• Michaele and Tareq Salahi, the now-infamous White House party crashers, have "postponed" a planned appearance on Larry King Live in an attempt to instead make "hundreds of thousands of dollars" by selling their story to the highest bidder. [NYTimes]

• Tiger Woods reportedly told a friend he needed to "run to Zales to get a 'Kobe Special.'" (meaning: a giant ring) last Friday after having a fight with his wife. Kobe Bryant, you might remember, purchased a $4 million ring for his wife, Vanessa, after being accused of sexual assault. [TMZ]
• Rachel Uchitel, Woods' alleged mistress, is reportedly meeting with high-profile attorney Gloria Allred. [TMZ]
• Uchitel vehemently denies that she and Woods had an affair, though she notes that even rumors of such a thing might cause drama: "Despite it being completely untrue, it still must have certainly caused some problems at home - if I was his wife, I probably would have killed him. This is nothing to do with me. The claims are completely false. We have never had an affair, talked on the phone or sent any type of text, sexy or not. I'm really upset about it because I'm being portrayed as a home-wrecker, when it simply isn't true." [NewsOfTheWorld]
• Audio of Woods' 911 call after the accident may be released to the public at some point today. [TheSun]
• Rupert Everett says his friendship with Madonna was destroyed after Everett wrote about her in his book, Red Carpets and Other Banana Skins. "I think it is very affectionate, and certainly with her I was very careful to only write things that were," he says of the book, "But she felt it was an infringement of privacy." [Guardian]
• "I'm most drawn to characters who are compelling and repellant at the same time, very often right at the same moment, and who are frightening and funny all at once."-James Spader[NYTimes]
• "You know, a day doesn't go by where you don't think about him. It's always there, in every sense. But it will get better. It's not easy, but I know with time it will get easier. But it will never be easy. It's my brother."-Janet Jackson, on losing her brother, Michael. [TimesOnline]
• Alec Baldwin says he's lost his interest in acting and plans to give it up after his 30 Rock contract expires: "Movies are part of my past. It's been 30 years. I'm not young, but I have time to do something else," he says, "It's a difficult thing to say, but I believe it: I consider my entire movie career a complete failure." [ShowbizSpy]
• Heidi Klum has posted a picture of her (adorable) new daughter, Lou Samuel, on her website, writing that Lou is "beautiful beyond words and we are happy that she chose us to watch her grow over the coming years. From the moment she looked into both of our eyes it was endless love at first sight." [DailyMail]
• "Ive always been a businesswoman, because there's no way you can be in the music business and not be a businesswoman. It's always been a part of ever since I began in music, Since I was 16. I've always been very inclined to really just take control of the things that I want to see happen and to really be proactive about it so to extend and to expand into different ventures my entrepreneurial spirit has definitely been calling to me just because there's so many ways to express yourself and jewelry is such a beautiful expression, it's a self expression."-Alicia Keys on her new jewelry line. [WSJ]
• Martha Stewart was spotted at the Four Seasons on Thanksgiving, alongside Barbara Walters, Helen Gurley Brown, among others. Am I the only one whose mind is kind of blown by Martha Stewart going to a restaurant for Thanksgiving dinner? [PageSix]
• Jay-Z and Sean "Diddy" Combs rented out a $5000 a night room, complete with "padded walls and a couch, eight ounces of beluga caviar and a magnum of champagne," to just have a drink together and listen to some music. [PageSix]
• When the NYTimes pointed out that Lil' Wayne's music "is not necessarily lady-friendly," Beth Ditto replied: "No, but he's such an artist, and he's obsessed with [performing oral sex]. I think that's really cool and really girl-positive in a way. I think for hip-hop that's really rad." [NYTimes]
• In somewhat unsurprising news, Morrissey says he's thought about suicide, and that he thinks "self-destruction is honourable. I always thought it was. It's an act of great control and I understand people who do it." [Mirror]
• Brittany Murphy's husband was taken to the hospital yesterday for what Murphy believes was an asthma attack while on board an airplane. [TMZ]
• Fergie says she watched several Fellini films to get a feel for how Italian actresses carried themselves, in preparation for her role as an Italian prostitute in Nine. [DailyExpress]
• "I kind of became the poster girl for teen angst, which is a kind of crass way of saying it. But the teen roles that I was playing, they were bright and they were atypical. There was room there for that particular kind of character to mature, so I didn't face a great amount of resistance in that respect. But I think everybody has to fight to become a diverse artist because people are inclined to associate you with one thing or are a little unnerved by your daring to do something."-Claire Danes, on her role in My So-Called Life [WashingtonPost]
• Cindy Crawford admits that she used to receive Botox injections, "but I haven't done Botox for ten years. And I didn't do collagen, I don't think." [DailyMail]
• Though Toni Braxton's marriage of 8 years ended just days after she kissed Trey Songz onstage at the 2009 Soul Train Awards as part of a performance, Braxton claims the two are in no way related. [E!]
• Taylor Lautner was a bit shocked when Jamie Foxx approached him on the set of Lopez Tonight to ask for an autograph: "All of a sudden I hear this deep voice behind me: 'Taylor, Taylor!' .... And this guy walks up to me and he goes 'Hey ... my daughter is a huge fan, and I'm a huge fan is there any way I can get a picture with you. I'm Jamie Foxx.' I was like, 'Are you kidding me? Can I get a picture with you?'"[People]
• Interesting news for our SNL live thread crew: both James Franco and Taylor Lautner are set to host Saturday Night Live this December. Thoughts? [EW]
• When asked about Kate Moss' recent comments on how "nothing tastes as good as thin feels," Rihanna replied: "I can't believe she said. That is SO crazy. I love food because I'm from Barbados. If I was a catwalk model I'd be considered fat which I know is ridiculous." However: "I don't think people should discriminate against thicker models OR skinny models. If you're size zero you shouldn't be banned from the runway." [NewsOfTheWorld]
• "I don't care how talented you are: doing things like that is not nice. So fuck off ... Kanye just wants attention. As simple as that. He was like it before his mum died. So let's not make excuses. It's not fair to judge other people and to try to destroy their careers. Come on! Just stop it. Be nice!"-Joss Stone, who also thinks Russell Brand is "a disgusting pig. Mean, mean, mean." [Independent]

• Katie Holmes went with a group of her friends to see New Moon in New York. An eyewitness reports: "Katie talked through all of New Moon. It was unbelievable – they talked nonstop about the movie and everything else."

• The source continues: "Some people wanted to tell them to be quiet, but when they realized who it was, they stayed silent. No one wanted to shush Katie." [Fox News]
• The 17-year-old Michigan girl who claimed a man bit her on the neck after a screening of New Moon on Friday has admitted that the alleged culprit was just kissing her on the neck and she was a "willing participant." She's facing criminal charges for filing a false police report. [TMZ]
• There are three versions of Entertainment Weekly's new cover, featuring either Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, or Taylor Lautner. [Pop Sugar]
• Anderson Cooper is reportedly moving in with his boyfriend of eight months, gay bar owner Ben Maisani. A friend says, "Anderson has found his 'Mr. Right' in Ben. Their relationship is so solid they want to move in together, and they've been looking at Manhattan real estate." [National Enquirer]
• The Swiss court on Roman Polanski's release: "The 76-year-old appellant is married and the father of two minors... It can be assumed that as a responsible father he will, especially in view of his advanced age, attach greater importance to the financial security of his family than a younger person." His previous bail offer of his home as collateral was rejected and the court demanded money instead. Peter Cosandey, a former Zurich prosecutor, said it's unusual for a non-resident to be granted bail, but "cash is king." [AP]
• The Jackson family had an early Thanksgiving dinner on Tuesday. "That's really, really important because we're a family and throughout the years, the managers, the agents and Hollywood have tried to come between that," Jermaine Jackson said. "What they don't know is we were together before we came out here and we're going to continue to be together." [CNN]
• Now that Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman have split, he won't be spending Thanksgiving with her family. He can't visit his kids either, because it's Kate's day. "I won't be home," says Jon. "I'm going to my grandma's." [Us]
• Kim Kardashian posted a list of the 10 things she's most thankful for including her family, friends, fans, "Lamar for making Khloe the happiest girl in the world" and "My glam squad for always making me fabulous!" [Us]
• Courtney Love took her Hole bandmates to a strip club yesterday. "Courtney Love brought in a group of guys who all looked like Keith Richards, some of whom were in her band. They arrived about 12:30," a source reports. "She was saying she used to be a stripper and appreciated what the girls do. Courtney left in a limo with a female friend after 45 minutes, leaving the band to enjoy themselves." [N.Y. Post]
• Oprah Winfrey's former rival Phil Donahue says he understands why she wants to retire. "She's a remarkable story," he said, "But you're on air every day. Eventually you think, 'do people really want to hear me talk anymore?'" [N.Y. Post]
• In an email sent to Oprah.com subscribers, she writes: "Fifteen years ago, I wrote in my journal that one day I would create a television network, as I always felt my show was just the beginning of what the future could hold." Also, the Post is calling her "Prah" now, because it's just too difficult to type that "O." [N.Y. Post]
• Fergie experienced Daniel Day-Lewis' method acting while filming Nine. She says: "Daniel is very charming. I'd go into my dressing room, and I'd find this little note. I'd open it, and it would be Guido's stationary. He would write me little notes as Guido. They were very cute and very charming." [Popeater]
• The Real Housewives of New York were frolicking on the beach in St. John over the weekend, where they're filming an upcoming episode. [N.Y. Post]
• Hugh Jackman and Daniel Craig raised $7,000 for the charity Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS when they sold the sweaty vests they were wearing after a performance of A Steady Rain. One female audience member yelled, "How much for the pants?" to which Hugh responded: "By pants, we are talking about the trousers right?" [The Star]
• "I didn't fit in in high school and I felt like a freak," says Lady Gaga. "So I like to create this atmosphere for my fans where they feel like they have a freak in me to hang out with and they don't feel alone." [People]
• Kelly Osbourne says she's not upset that Donny Osmond won DWTS "Everyone kept coming up to me and saying, 'Are you okay? Are you okay?'" she said. "And I'm like, 'I never fucking thought I was going to win anyway!'" [Us]
• Levi Johnston has rethought his position on joining DWTS. "I think if my phone were to ring right now, I would probably say yes," he said. "Dancing isn't really my thing but I think I could do it... I mean, I'm pretty athletic so I think I could do just about anything." [ET]
• Kim Cattrall is posing nude to raise money to keep the painting "Diana and Callisto" by Titian in Britain's National Gallery and prevent it from being sold to a private foreign bidder. [Contact Music]
• Good Morning America cancelled a scheduled Adam Lambert appearance this morning, so he appeared on CBS's Early Show instead, along with the man he made out with at the AMAs. [TMZ]
• Liza Minnelli says the greatest moment in her career is yet to come. "I'm a Minnelli, so there's always something to do," she said. "I'll think of something. I always do." [Reuters]
• T.I. and Lil Wayne's daughters have joined with two other girls ages 11 to 13 to form the group OMG Girlz, which is managed by T.I.'s fiancée, Tameka 'Tiny' Cottle. [MTV]
• Sylvester Stallone is facing charges after he was photographed this weekend driving his Mustang with two little girls sharing one seat belt in the passenger seat. [Daily Express]
• John Mayer's new album Battle Studies topped the Billboard chart this week with 286,000 copies sold. [N.Y.T.]
• Erik Estavillo, who is suing the makers of World of Warcraft for creating a virtual environment that he says has given him various emotional problems, has subpoenaed Depeche Mode founder Martin Lee Gore because "he himself has been known to be sad, lonely, and alienated as can be seen in the songs he writes," and Winona Ryder because she'll be able to "explain the significance of alienation in Catcher in the Rye and will also testify to how alienation in the book can tie to alienation in real live/video games such as World of Warcraft." [Game Politics]
• James McAvoy usually won't do films with his wife Anne-Marie Duff, but he made an exception for The Last Station. He said, "We've been offered a hell of a lot of parts playing opposite each other in films and TV and we just turn them down. If you do work together you put yourself up, you make yourself a target and you make your relationship a target and all of that. We're very keen not to do that. But in The Last Station we don't play opposite each other hardly at all. It was nice to spend those two months together rather than spending those two months apart, while she's off somewhere doing God knows what and I'm off doing God knows what. So it was fine. It was quite easy with this one." [Daily Express]
• Viggo Mortensen says his role in The Road was difficult physically. "We had good makeup and all that, but because it was such a tough journey physically and emotionally, as I gradually got closer to [the character], I literally was getting weaker and weaker and it took more energy to just focus — which was right. So it was this gradual decline into character that in some part was real. I mean, I was pretty beat by the end, and so was Kodi. And it shows. There were things that are on screen that are beyond whatever we prepared." [Inside Movies]
• "I was playing truth or dare when I had my first kiss," says Kellan Lutz. "I was probably 7. I learned to hold the girl and I won as best kisser. They picked me because I actually held the girls when I kissed them. I loved kissing them because they had flavored lip glosses on, which was great." [People]
• "Nothing surprises me in terms of reviews," says New Moon director Chris Weitz. "Having been a reviewer myself, there are only two ways to spin this story. You can either be the one guy who says this is a great movie, or more likely, take a more jaundiced view of the whole thing. And given the media blitz that has accompanied New Moon, it's rather unsurprising. I do wish there was more appreciation for cinematographer Javier Aguirresarobe. I think he's a genius, and I think he made something beautiful." [Us]
• "I have (my Oscar) in my house in Spain and I still haven't found the right place for it. But for the first month when I won I was so excited about it, I took it everywhere with me. I took it — this is true — I even took it to the beach one day and put it under a towel." — Penelope Cruz [UPI]

Know what's great about Carrie Underwood's dress? You just know from sense memory that it feels like one of those Barbie gowns.


Don't worry, Selena Gomez, there's enough glitz to go around!


So, over the weekend I was considering the purchase of a pair of silk tap shorts. And the saleslady said to me, "the great thing is, when you can't decide between a skirt or pants, you reach for the shorts." Wonder if that was Chani Christie's process.


I like how Melissa Etheridge always puts just enough thought into her selections to make you think. Think about...life. And sequins.


Ah, the barber pole. The last refuge of a scoundrel.


Reba McIntyre may or may not have ridden here. Through a briar patch. Western-style, presumably.


Shakira looks adorable, is apparently going to walk through a Medieval town square filled with excrement for an audience with the king.


That's good: otherwise we might not have been sure where Kelly Clarkson's breasts were.


It's like Toni Braxton's leg is about to perform a Gypsy Rose Lee-style striptease.


What Phoebe Price has to do with American Music, I can't say. What she has to do with "never disappointing" is a lot.


Oh, but you know what's apparently over my head? Leona Lewis's dress.


Paula Abdul, once again, dressed for a ball that only she is attending. This may be genius. It may be tragic.


Rihanna's die-cut doily: the evening's most creative - and prettiest - look.


Is Alicia Keys' frock a) for a figure-skating engagement later in the evening b) a bet she lost c) Andy Kaufman-style performance art or, and I very much fear it's this, d) none of the above?


Kristen, psst...there's a strip missing from your dress. Oh, it's supposed to be like that? I'll just...walk over here. There's Val Kilmer. In a hat.


Remember those weird "toys" where there were a bunch of pins in a box and you stuck your hand or, if you were brave, your face in, and it sort of hurt, but at the end you had a really neat, ephemeral impression of it? Fergie does!


I'll say this for Bobby Trendy. He's gotten his picture up on Getty.

[Images via Getty]

[Los Angeles, November 20. Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

• How do we feel about the fact that Miley Cyrus dressed as Julia Roberts' Pretty Woman hooker-with-a-heart-of-gold character for an '80s party to celebrate her 17th birthday Wednesday night? [Page Six]

• ANTM winner Nicole Fox had a "secret" meeting with Robert Pattinson… meaning, she ran into him backstage at Regis & Kelly. She says: "I was backstage going to the bathroom-in a bathroom I probably wasn't supposed to be using. But when I came out, [Pattinson] was in the hallway, like two feet away from me, [just] standing there. He was surrounded by his throng of people. And so I didn't want to feel like a dorky fangirl. I just looked down at my shoes and walked away." Of course Nicole admits: "I haven't seen the Twilight movies… Perhaps I will begin to watch [them] now that I saw him in real life." [E!]
• Madonna visited a "lawless favela" in Rio — and wore a bullet-proof vest under her leather jacket. Doesn't she know that music makes the people come together? Doesn't she know that music makes the bourgeoisie and the rebel? [Page Six]
• Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony's guard dog, Floyd, attacked a flight attendant on a private jet; and an animal behaviorist says the German Shepherd is a menace who needed counseling. [NY Daily News]
• Monday is the series finale of Jon & Kate Plus 8, and in the ep, the two "continue to make the transition into single parenthood." Kate takes the kids to milk a cow; Jon takes them to a fire station. [NY Daily News]
• MSNBC's Courtney Hazlett suggests that this Thanksgiving, we should be grateful for the end of Jon & Kate. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Roman Polanski's lawyer says while the director is imprisoned in Switzerland, his wife and two children are "very upset psychologically by this separation that is a true heartbreak" for them. [MSNBC via AP]
• Tila Tequila says her naked Ustream rant — which has since been removed from the interwebs — was caused by "flashbacks" and "pressure" related to her allegedly violent incident with her ex, Shawne Merriman. [TMZ]
• Lady Gaga is set to do some songs at this year's Royal Variety Performance — which is attended by the Queen. This column questions whether she will actually pretended to stab herself to death while playing the piano and then hang from the ceiling, covered in blood — when the Queen is watching. [Daily Mail]
• Remember when hip-hop had beef? Beanie Sigel and Jay-Z are bringing it back. [Gatecrasher]
• Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens — known in the tween mags as Zanessa — have not broken up, despite rumors. Things are going well, they are rich and young and sexy and happy, etc, etc, etc. [Us]
• Jon Gosselin's lawyer says Kate Major's lawsuit is a joke. Finally we agree on something! [Radar Online]
• Audrina Patridge from The Hills and Mark Sallin, aka Puck from Glee: Spotted flirting and leaving a party together. [Page Six]
• Breaking: Amber Rose spotted without Kanye. [Page Six]
• Kathy Hilton has been in touch with the Jacksons and says that Paris, Prince and Blanket are "wonderful" and their "grandmother is incredible" and they "could not be in better hands." [People]
• Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate testified yesterday, saying that she was living in a West Virginia motel around the time a police chief allegedly broke into her home in Ohio. [NY Post]
• Fergie, the Duchess of York, went to Turkey last year with daughter Princess Eugenie to investigate the treatment of mentally and physically disabled children in orphanages. The Duchess wore a dark wig and headscarf and posed as an aid worker to get the story for a TV exposé; now she's been served papers and may have to stand trial in Turkey — she's is accused of breaking laws that ban secret filming and trespassing on government property in the country. [Mirror]
• Jordin Sparks had an appendectomy yesterday. [NY Post]
• Sigourney Weaver believes that the James Cameron film Avatar will make all the money back, because people will see it several times. She also says Cameron was "always sweet" to her during Aliens. [NY Mag]
• The Jonas Brothers are promoting Xbox 360 with Jonas-centric ads. [NY Times]
• "Do lesbians rule Hollywood? Ask Jane Lynch." [Guardian]
• This video of Hayden Panettiere is bukkake/facial-esque. [The Life Files]
• Ruh-roh: Eddie Cibrian is suing Life & Style, because the mag published stories which allegedly "falsely portray Eddie as being unfaithful to LeAnn Rimes, as currently being in a romantic relationship with [some other woman] and as having abandoned his children." Can they get out of the lawsuit if, at the end of each story, the copy reads, "Aoccirding to a source"? [TMZ]
• Sadie Frost is publishing her autobiography, which will probably have details about her BFF Kate Moss, the catty fashion world, and ex husband Jude Law. [Daily Express]
• When Jamie Cullum said that girlfriend Sophie Dahl "has a face for radio," he was probably joking. [Daily Express]
• Uma Thurman will play Robert Pattinson's wife in a film called Bel Ami, based on a Guy de Maupassant's short story. [The Hollywood Reported]
• James Van Der Beek has filed for divorce from his wife of six years. [USA Today]
• James Caan has filed for divorce from his wife of 14 years. [USA Today]
• At the link, Freddie Mercury's mother talks about her son eighteen years after his death. [BBC News]
• "I think probably the first thing that was an incredible hurdle was that I wasn't going to be able to do this privately like most people, and that took a really long time to get over." — Chaz Bono, on the hardest part of his sex change. [People]
• "She sent me sexy pictures of herself in a bikini and stuff, but nothing worse than the stuff you find now by just Googling her name." — one of Carrie Prejean's ex boyfriends — and not the one she sent the "solo sex tape" to. [E!]
• "It was scary, but it was so much fun. It was great seeing that we were all feeling the same way. There was a great support system on that set, all the actors with each other and with Rob [Marshall]. I had danced classical ballet before, so this was very different from what I had studied. We had a room in our building and we were all taking different classes. We would all pass each other in the hallway. All day, training. We all felt so free and so happy. Music was so present everywhere. That elevates people, music. It was so addictive, that experience." — Penelope Cruz on the six-week rehearsal period she, Kate Hudson, Nicole Kidman and Marion Cotillard had for Nine, in which they took dancing and singing lessons. [USA Today]
• "What people don't realize is, I am managing my image, more than maybe the editor of OUT magazine likes to give anybody credit for. My team is a team. And I really feel fortunate that 19 Management and Simon Fuller said to me, from the get-go, 'We want to do what you want to do. You need to tell us how you want to do things, what interests you have,' and they've been incredibly supportive of me. I really mean it. I'm not being puppeted around. I didn't want to jump onto a gay magazine as my first thing, because I feel like that's putting myself in a box and limiting myself. It was my desire to stay away from talking about certain political and civil rights issues because I'm not a politician. I'm an entertainer. That is not my area of expertise. I can talk about relationships and personal experiences because as an artist those things involve writing lyrics and that part of my process. But I didn't feel comfortable talking about the March on Washington. I didn't feel comfortable, so I asked my publicist to ask the interviewer to stay away from the political questions. I take full responsibility for that. I think that the editor has his agenda and has his opinions, which I respect, but they're not necessarily my opinions. And I wish there was a little respect for that. Not every gay man is the same gay man." — Adam Lambert. [EW]
• "I've never told anyone this before. This is a hair scoop. Shower before you go to bed, and then sleep on your wet hair. Towel-dry it. In the morning, it's all messed up naturally. If you have that messed-up thing going when you wake up, it's more willing to stay that way. That's Zac's hair tip." — Zac Efron. [Time]
• "[When I was younger] I wasn't confident in my sexuality but I had these thoughts, these desires and these passions inside me. I never knew how to exorcise them until probably the first time I had sex, and it was a great experience. I felt like, why should I be so hindered about this? [I thought about porn] …I thought, why should sex have to be dirty or scary? And if it is, why can't you turn that into a positive thing and work through that sensually and find something good out of that, something pleasurable." — Sasha Grey. [Telegraph]
• "I would not say that I lost faith in Twitter, I would say that I lost faith in my ability to negotiate it. I don't know about you but whenever I read a blog I do not let my eye drop below half the screen in case I accidentally hit the bit where the comments reside. Of all the stinking, sliding, scuttling, weird, entomological creatures that inhabit the floor of the internet those comments on blogs are the most unbearable, almost beyond imagining. Their resentment, their desire to be heard at the most vituperative level, at the most unpleasant and malevolent, genuinely ill-willed malevolent, level is terrifying and I am very often simply not able to cope with that. Twitter is usually not like that... [but] I found that the @ mentions were just getting... I could see these comments that would just make me upset." — Stephen Fry. [Guardian]
• "I've had some bad moments where I've woken up under a car with the engine still running." — Zach Galifianakis. [Page Six]
• "She wears really, really attractive underwear." — Bono on his wife. Well, not on. But maybe. [Gatecrasher]
• "They made a porn movie about Sarah Palin and the same actress, Lisa Ann, played me in the porn version of 30 Rock. Weirdly, of the three of us, Lisa Ann knows the most about foreign policy." — Tina Fey. [Page Six]

• According to documents filed by the FBI and U.S. Attorney's office today, an acquaintance of Cindy Crawford's former nanny threatened to sell a picture of her 7-year-old daughter bound to a chair in revealing clothing.

• Cindy Crawford's rep has issued a statement saying she and her husband Rande Gerber had no knowledge of the photo and that it was taken as part of a game. [Radar Online]
• As you'll recall, Michael Lohan just released a tape in which Dina Lohan talks about Lindsay Lohan cutting herself. The tape is from last year, but Radar Online found pictures of Lindsay with new cuts on her arms from this summer. [Radar Online]
• Before running out of Crown Bar on Thursday to cry in an alley, Lindsay Lohan ordered a bottle of champagne but when she was given the bill, "Lindsay pointed over at Kellan Lutz and told the waitress just to charge his card," said a source. [Fox News]
• Someone pulled the fire alarm at Dorchester in London in the middle of the night yesterday, forcing Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, and Taylor Lautner to stand out on the street. [E!]
• "If I was friends with Bella I'd be like, 'Please make life easier and date Jacob,'" said Kristen Stewart. [People]
• Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke has confirmed that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are dating — sort of. "After I cast him, I told Rob, Don't even think about having a romance with her. She's under 18. You will be arrested," she said. Though she "didn't have a camera in the hotel room" while they were shooting Twilight, "In terms of what Kristen told me directly, it didn't happen on the first movie. Nothing crossed the line while on the first film... I think it took a long time for Kristen to realize, O.K., I've got to give this a go and really try to be with this person." [Radar Online]
• Balloon Dad Richard Heene has surrendered himself to authorities. You can check out his mug shot here: [Radar Online]
• Though Donald Trump denies Carrie Prejean's accusation that he rated Miss USA contestants back stage, audio has surfaced of him implementing "The Trump Rule," in which he and his staff select the women who will automatically make it past the first round. [TMZ]
• Carrie Prejean pulled out of a talk she was supposed to give today at the Capitol Hill Club in Washington, D.C. because she didn't want to be asked about the new allegation that she was actually 20, not underage, in her sex tape. [TMZ]
• Miss California USA pageant director Keith Lewis says, "The public is finally getting a glimpse of the real Carrie Prejean who lives in her own delusional world. The childish behavior, her negative attitude, the sarcasm and condescending tone, the disrespect and continual lying she is demonstrating now is only a fraction of what we endured during her reign and after... I sincerely hope she is able to get the psychological help I believe she has shown to clearly need." [TMZ]
• Many fans are selling their tickets to Britney Spears' upcoming Melbourne and Sydney shows because they're distraught over her Australian lip synching scandal. [News.com.au]
• Britney Spears worships Satan and is hoping the "new world order" will arrive soon... or her Twitter account was hacked. [TMZ]
• This was bound to happen eventually: Levi Johnston is reaching out to Jon Gosselin saying, "He's a good guy... He's kind of in the same situation I am right now. He's a good dad and he gets a lot of bad press. He's getting the same bad image as I am and it ain't true. I can relate to that." [People]
• When asked about the size of his penis Levi Johnston said, "A lot of people ask that, but you're just going to have to wait until next week when the magazine comes out. You will have to wait and see. I'm sorry, you're going to have to." [N.Y. Magazine]
• In the video at the link Chris Brown is posing with fans at Footaction in New York when a woman in the crowd screams, "fucking beater" and "I hope someone beats the fucking crap out of you." Chris smiles and walks past her, but one of his fans yells "Smack that bitch up." [TMZ]
• Rihanna says the new music video, which will be released tomorrow, is "kind of twisted but it's going to make people think. There's a great message and story behind it. 'Russian Roulette' is all about a fear, whether it be fear of love or a fear of getting hurt, whether it be emotionally or physically." [The Mirror]
• Nicole Forrester, the stripper who claims she slept with Josh Duhamel, has apologized to Fergie. "I thought, 'Nobody's gonna find out. It's not gonna hurt anybody," she says "I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I didn't think of it at the time like I think of it now." [Extra]
• Fergie's mom, Terri Jackson, defended Josh Duhamel saying, "My daughter's life is amazing and Josh is a great guy - that story is bullshit as far as I'm concerned... It was totally ridiculous and absurd and I'm confident their marriage will weather the media storm." [Radar Online]
• Two of Nicholas Cage's New Orleans homes were auctioned today because he didn't pay the mortgages. [TMZ]
• Joe Perry says he doesn't consider Steven Tyler a part of Aerosmith anymore even though he sang with the band on Tuesday. "[Tyler] wants to take two years off from the band. The rest of the band wants to keep on working. We have so many different options to fill up that time. Anything is possible at this point," said Perry. [Contact Music]
• Tara Reid has been wearing a new pink diamond ring. She says, "I got a beautiful ring from my boyfriend for my birthday last weekend, but we're not engaged ... yet!" [People]
• Extra claims Joe Torre said Kate Hudson is "relaxing" A-Rod, but all he said was, "Somebody is relaxing him, that's all I can say, because he certainly looked like he enjoyed himself this year." [Extra]
• Leona Lewis says she's getting over being attacked by a fan because, "I'm from Hackney, so I'm hard - I'm not going to let something like that bother me." She added, "When you grow up where I did you learn to move on. There was always some kind of craziness going on in my neighborhood. The boys were always fighting each other and there was loads of street crime. I know how to look after myself." [The Mirror]
• George Hamilton has joined the cast of the UK version of I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out Of Here!" [AFP]
• Check out spoilers for Big Bang Theory, Grey's Anatomy, Glee, and a slew of other network shows here: [Entertainment Weekly]
• Stephanie Pratt says her recent DUI arrest was, "The worst thing to happen to me and, at the same time, it was the biggest blessing. I learned to not fall apart, which is something that I usually do when something goes bad in my life. I learned that it is all about temptation and that I am being tested." [People]
• Court officials in Arizona say Mike Tyson punching a paparazzo at LAX yesterday may have been a violation of his probation. If it's found that he broke the law he could do 2.5 years in prison. [TMZ]
• This Is It has taken in more than $200 million worldwide in the past two weeks. [Reuters]
• John Branca and John McClain have been named the executors of Michael Jackson's estate. [TMZ]
• Listen to Lady Gaga and Beyonce's Video Phone here: [Perez Hilton]
• Robert De Niro says he's glad it took him a little while to become famous. "I think it's important to have had at least a few years of obscurity, where people treat you like everybody else," he says. "Then it goes crazy, and all of a sudden people behave differently toward you, they're agreeing with you all the time, they're not telling you no." [Parade]
• Elizabeth Hurley has a new diet trick: "I don't miss having a glass of wine because I've switched to vodka," said the hawt momma. "I don't really like vodka that much but if I'm at a party I have a small one with a lot of fizzy water and a huge squeeze of lime. Initially it's like medicine but I've got used to it now." [Perez Hilton]
• James Franco's "frequent artistic collaborator" Carter is behind his guest appearance on General Hospital. "It's for several different things," says carter. "It was an idea that I posed to him, and it's tied to another film that he and I are working on now. It's not specifically for another project, because I know that he's really enjoying the challenge of working on a soap - it's a very taxing job, and an interesting thing for him to be doing - but it does have to do with another film that he and I are working on." [Movieline]

• Some people were offended by the jokes Alex Borstein made about Marlee Matlin's speaking voice on Sunday's Family Guy special. She says, "It was sick. It was twisted. It was rude... and I was glad to be part of it."

• "People love [Seth MacFarlane's] stuff. They don't pay him the big bucks for nothing," Matlin wrote in an email. "I want to do it again and BE the voice. BTW, it only would've been offensive if I hadn't laughed and I loved that you couldn't quite figure out if I was seriously angry at Alex or not!" [Hollywood Insider]
• Jon Voight says he and Angelina Jolie have reconciled. "We're in touch, but not regularly," he says. "We love each other and that's the most important thing." [Us]
• "Amy Winehouse is addicted to table tennis." [Mirror]
• John Travolta, who recently started playing tennis, says, "I play at midnight... Kind of vampire style." [People]
• The Twilight kids are on the cover of Entertainment Weekly this week and in the mag Taylor Lautner says, "Jacob and Bella are so open, and they can tell each other everything. So it was very important for me and Kristen to grow very close before doing this." [Just Jared]
• "The highlight of playing Jane [in New Moon]was getting to wear the costume and the red contact lenses and to play an evil character," says Dakota Fanning. "I think red eyes make everyone look very evil." [L.A.T.]
• If you want to watch Robert Pattinson talk about his facial hair, check out this video: [Pop Sugar]
• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt have written a book called How To Be Famous: Our Guide to Looking the Part, Playing the Press and Becoming a Tabloid Fixture. [Ok]
• In the video at the link, Robert Halderman's lawyer explains that he wasn't trying to blackmail David Letterman, he was just giving him the right of first refusal on his screenplay. [TMZ]
• David Letterman's lawyer says he's "absolutely" ready to testify against Robert Halderman and is "fully prepared to see this case through to the end." [CBS News]
• Sad news: Though Celine Dion announced she was pregnant this summer, it was a misdiagnosis. Her husband Rene Angelil said, "We're living the reality of the majority of couples who face these procreation techniques." [Us]
• Sources say TLC's lawyers are watching all of Jon Gosselin's TV appearances so they can run a tab on how much money he's making since he allegedly violated his contract with the network. [TMZ]
• Shanna Moakler says she's "looking forward to seeing" Carrie Prejean's sex tape. [TMZ]
• Last night Susan Boyle sang on DWTS and got to meet her idol, Donny Osmond. "It is quite something to be in Hollywood," she explains. "This is a world I've never seen before and never dreamt that I would get to see," said Boyle, who added that Hollywood is, "Nothing a woman like me was used to. I have found Americans to be incredibly warm and friendly and very open." [People]
• Susan Boyle says after she became famous, "There were phone calls 24 hours a day. They kept me awake for three weeks, until I changed my number. It was constant... "It got to the stage where I couldn't even go outside because the media - American television crews, too - surrounded the house... Everything had built up, and I was exhausted. You have to understand, my life ceased to be normal." [Show Biz Spy]
• Joey Lawrence and his wife Chandie Yawn-Nelson are expecting their second child. [Us]
• Mickey Rourke says after his divorce from Carre Otis, "I don't want to live with an actress again, no matter how they look. I'm working opposite Megan Fox and Eva Green next, and I'm certainly not complaining. But I'll tell you, once bitten..." [Daily Express]
• Though Steven Tyler played with Aerosmith on Tuesday, Joe Perry says he still doesn't know if that means he's staying in the band. "I was totally surprised. I had no idea he was going to show up," said Perry. "All I know is we walked off stage and were sitting taking our break [before] the encore and there was a bunch of commotion and I looked up and Steven was there." [People]
• Halle Berry says she decided to get involved with Jenesse Center, a L.A. domestic violence shelter, because, "My mother was a battered woman and that was my childhood for a good chunk of it... I care, I really care about these women and children." [Us]
• John Cusack on being called an "everyman": "I've been called worse, but I'm not the best person to ask about that. I think it's a compliment if it's sort of a leading-man type compliment. You get the audience to sympathize with you ... it's kind of a cool thing to be an 'everyman' I guess." [BlackBook Magazine]
• Ian McKellen says sometimes gay actors ask him for advice about coming out and he says, "When I act, some people fancy me and some of them are women. There we are! What's the problem? They don't believe me when I say I am in love with a woman?...They don't believe me when I say I am a wizard? They believe me even though they know I am not. It's all nonsense. Everyone knows we are acting." [Reuters]
• Tori Amos says she did a lot of research before recording her holiday album Midwinter Graces because, "In order to make this kind of record and to have it work, I needed to know what the carol writers were doing, then you need to know the theology of where it came from in order to change it. I did change it in making it more inclusive rather than exclusive. Because some of these lyrics were written, it was in a very puritanical time. Women had no rights, they couldn't vote. Some of the music would've been fifteenth century." [N.Y. Magazine]
• You can stop holding your breath — Pamela Anderson says she'll never rekindle her romance with Tommy Lee again. "You can't get heartbroken any more over all the disappointments or how he is as a father or anything like that. He doesn't think he's doing anything wrong. I do tell him the truth, but it's been 10 years of suffering over him so I'm over it," she says. "Whatever it is, it is - as long as my kids are happy and we're happy and we're safe, let him run around the world. I support him." [New]
• Ronnie Wood of the Rolling Stones has been very openly dating much younger women for over a year, but his wife Jo Wood just filed divorce papers accusing him of adultery. [TMZ]
• "I definitely keep myself secret," says Leona Lewis. "I went on a show watched by millions of people, so this might sound ridiculous, but I had no desire to be famous, and I still don't. I have this media persona – "She's a shy girl, really nice" – but you can't get to know someone like that. Unless you talk to me every day, you're not really going get a sense of me." [The Telegraph]
• James Franco says he doesn't think he can study in Columbia University's Butler Library anymore. He explains: "Last night I went in, I went into the restroom and this guy was in there and he's mumbling like, 'You're James Franco, right?' I'm like, 'Yeah, how's it going?' Basically, he said he was annoyed with me that I came to the library and that there are girls in the library. He didn't express himself. I think what he meant was that he thought I came to the library to meet young girls and he said it wasn't fair. And I tried to apologize for any disruption my presence had, but he was still annoyed. So I left and I went to the writing building, which is a little more private, but I have to sit there alone in the dark." [Gothamist]
• Jason Schwartzman, whose mom is Talia Shire, said, "I think it's an amazing thing that two words like 'Yo, Adrian' have been so unforgotten. People yell it out when you achieve something, or you've spent a lot of energy and you accomplish something. You yell it out like, 'I did it!' Growing up a lot of kids didn't know my mom [Talia Shire] was in Rocky. And we'd go to P.E. class and we'd have to go jogging; everyone would run up stairs and all the kids would yell it out. They didn't even know my mom was in the movie. It made me feel kind of awkward but also kind of so happy." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Hip-hop artists are "completely gay-friendly. Are you kidding me? Look at how they dress!" said Fergie. "Kanye West really did a great thing for hip-hop and made it very mixed and open." [MTV]

• Dina Lohan is pissed that Michael Lohan keeps leaking recordings of Dina and Lindsay's phone calls to him. "The tapes were from a long time ago, and for a father to stoop this low is unforgivable," she says. And:

"My ex-husband has been in and out of jail for 10 years. My children and I gave him a chance to get to know them again, and he clearly blew that chance!" And: "I have had a criminal order of protection from the domestic violence sector since 2005. He was not supposed to even be harassing me by phone." Lastly, if you're still listening: "My heart is breaking for my children that he could do this. He has no visitation anymore and is six months behind in child support. The authorities have been alerted!" [E!]

• Hey, guess what? Michael Lohan has released another recording of a phone conversation between himself and Dina Lohan. She blames him for Lindsay cutting herself, and says: "It's bad." And Dina believes that "something's gonna happen" and it'll be all Michael's fault. [Radar Online]
• Rosie O'Donnell and Megan Fox are afraid of Angelina Jolie. Kristen Stewart says she doesn't want to be like Angelina Jolie. This column asks, Is Hollywood turning on Angelina Jolie? Eh, do you think she gives a shit? [MSNBC Scoop]
• This daytime noir Donnie Darko-esque promo for James Franco on General Hospital is kind of fucking awesome. "Anyone can die at anytime!" [NY Magazine]
• Miss J says of his 7-year-old son: "He insists on wearing nice shoes. I think somehow my fashion genes must have slipped in there." [Us Magazine]
• Kate Hudson is "pushing" A-Rod to elope. Because that's what women do! [Gatecrasher]
• Rihanna spent more than $50,000 to fly her family to New York from Barbados for the Glamour Awards. [Page Six]
• You can watch Rihanna's speech from the Glamour Woman of the Year Awards at the link. A snippet: "Maya Angelou, I love you, but you make this terribly difficult for me." [YouTube]
• LOL headline of the day, via Russell Brand: "Katy Can't Do Your Show… She's Doing Me Instead." [The Sun]
• Kristen Stewart on those who ask whether she and Rob are an item: "The only way that I'm able to stay sane is to protect myself, and like, I know that it doesn't matter how you answer a question, it's going to tip. Someone's going to say, 'She's totally with him,' or, 'No, I don't think she is,' so it's sort of like, I don't care. You just have to seriously be like, have it, have it all. Take my, you know what I mean, just like, you want my shoes? Here you go, what size do you wear?" [ET]
• The 40-year-old women following Zac Efron around were just trying to get his picture for their daughters. No, really. [Page Six]
• Emma Thompson made some comments about her adopted Rwandan son had been subjected to racism at the University of Exeter, and now the Culture Secretary has said: "Miss Thompson is a great actress, but her comments about Exeter… are insulting… Any incidence of racism is one too many, but Exeter comes top or near top in every survey of places for friendliness and quality of life." [Telegraph]
• Sharon Stone was at a fancy Madison Avenue salon and used a private room; Queen Noor of Jordan was also there to get her hair done, but sat in the main area with the plebes. [Page Six]
• The David Letterman blackmail case is "all out war." [NY Post]
• Michael Jackson's funeral bills are in. Total cost: $855,730.31. [TMZ]
• Janet Jackson, called here "the only Jackson who was flush with cash," fronted $49,000 for Michael Jackson's funeral. She'll be reimbursed via his estate, which will also pay the remaining balance. [TMZ]
• Joe Jackson, who was trying to object to Michael Jackson's will and executors, has been shut down by a judge. [TMZ]
• An Andy Warhol portrait of Michael Jackson sold for $812,000 in an auction last night. [NY Post]
• "Winona Ryder and Barry Pepper have been cast to star in the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie When Love Is Not Enough: The Lois Wilson Story." It's the true story of the co-founder of Al-Anon and her alcoholic husband, who lived the high life in the 1920s but a downfall by the 50s. [Variety]
• Playgirl wanted to shoot Levi Johnston in the penthouse of a certain downtown hotel but didn't have enough cash to pay the fee. [Page Six]
• Dominique Swain, who once posed for PETA, has reportedly been "caught" dumping unvaccinated puppies at an animal shelter. [ONTD, Fox 411]
• Heather Locklear's return to Melrose Place is a desperate attempt to get people to care. Is it working on you? Then check out this clip from the show in which Heather — playing Amanda — says, "When I hired you to give this place a makeover, I didn't mean smear it with lipstick and turn it into a five-dollar hooker." [People]
• Celine Dion is adding a "pool complex" to her home in Jupiter Island, Florida — with "two giant pools, waterslides and a lazy river, much like an amusement park." One neighbor complains: "Distasteful is what it looks like - the whole thing sounds like a Michael Jackson fairyland to me." [MSNBC Scoop via Life & Style]
• Some dude is suing Bon Jovi, Time Warner and Major League Baseball for $400 billion, yeah, BILLION, dollars. He claims that he wrote an ode to the Boston Red Sox entitled, "(Man I Really) Love this Team." During the 2007 playoffs, Bon Jovi released a song, "I Love This Town," and the guy took the case to court. One judge dismissed it, but the guy is appealing. [Reuters]
• George Lopez's new late night talk show debuted with strong ratings. Did anyone watch? I found it only mildly funny, with too many race jokes. But I didn't watch the whole thing. [Reuters]
• Steven Tyler supposedly quit Aerosmith, but last night he showed up at an NYC club for Joe Perry's show, announced he wasn't leaving Aerosmith, and joined in on "Walk This Way." My friend Matt says: "If anyone can save the future of Aerosmith by settling the feud between Steven Tyler and Joe Perry, it's got to be Tyler Perry." [Roger Friedman's 411.com] 
• Shakira hugged and 11-year-old fan and it is news. [Page Six]
• Sir Ian McKellan mocked Jude Law at a charity event; Jude swore, "I go home religiously every night after Hamlet." Sir Ian joked, "I guess the night I saw you, you went home via [popular NYC nightclub] the Box." [La Dolce Musto]
• Julianne Hough and Chuck Wicks have broken up. [People]
• "A rare collection of Beatles autographs and photographs, given to a 14-year-old who traipsed across Salisbury plain in the rain to catch a glimpse of her heroes on the set of Help!, sold for £2,200 at auction in Berkshire yesterday." [Guardian]
• Rod Stewart, father of seven, is trying to have another baby with wife Penny Lancaster. Forever young? [People]
• Whatshername will be on I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here but arrive late and earn five times more cash than other contestants. [The Sun]
• "I think there's a lot of persuasive and powerful people around Obama. For a president to make his own decisions, I think that's a rarity. Even someone who we think of as our guy — this is a guy with integrity, a guy who cares, for the first time in a long time — in the Oval Office, even with him we don't really know who's pulling the strings. I think of every president as being a marionette. Whether he's any different, I don't know. Certainly his military advisers all want him to prosecute this war to the end, just as they did in Vietnam with LBJ. It's just too depressing, I think we're going to have to hit the streets. Obama has the chance of becoming JFK or LBJ. I think JFK was one of our last great presidents, although I thought Carter was pretty great too. LBJ could have been a great president if he hadn't gotten bogged down in war, but that was quite a war to get bogged down in. Notwithstanding the fact that the war was wrong and they were talking about the Red Scare and the domino effect, if you go and read the Pentagon Papers they were also talking about rubber, tin and oil. They killed two and a half million people. What was it all for? In Korea they killed four and a half million. Like, we're liberating these people?" — Woody Harrelson plays a soldier in his intense new film The Messenger and, at the link, has lots of thoughts about war, death, the military and President Obama. [Salon]
• "They got in trouble because my children are riding their dirt bikes through the whole trailer park, going crazy, doing flips — and everyone's concerned for their safety. And mom's like, 'Oh, they've been riding the whole weekend, they're having a blast!' I was like, 'They're not allowed to ride their dirt bikes in the trailer park!' They terrorize the neighborhood the whole time." — Pamela Anderson's sons — 13 and 11 — are tiny terrors. [Contact Music]
• "I don't have to play scenes with actors standing on buckets." — Sigourney Weaver, 6 feet tall, says that she doesn't believe her height has ever intimidated leading men. [Telegraph]
• "I had a great time with Hef and the girls when they came to see Peepshow and hang out in Vegas.  I don't watch the other episodes though, because it kind of makes me mad. The girls need to focus on what makes them unique and not doing the same things Bridget, Kendra and I have already done on the show.  Even camping in the backyard was an idea I had for an episode that we never got around to shooting.  And guess what they just showed? The girls camping in the backyard.  I don't want to look behind, I want to look forward." — Holly Madison is annoyed by the new Girls Next Door. [Fox 411]
• "I don't know that [Oprah] and Gayle are necessarily doing each other, but I think they are the emotional equivalent of.. [a gay couple]. When they did that road trip, that's as gay as it gets, and I don't mean it to be an insult, either. I'm just saying, listen, if you ask me, that's the couple." — Rosie O'Donnell. [ONTD via Times Of The Internet]
• "These jeans are a few days old, but the top is probably fresh because it gets to the point where even I can't stand the air around me. I don't know, my personal hygiene - it's so disgusting! Really it's just that I have very few clothes that I like and I'm travelling all the time, so I can't really get any more." — we get it, Robert Pattinson, you're filthy. [MSNBC via New! magazine]
• "I love clothes, and fashion is a great art form. Being a woman and my femininity are very important to me. But with my work I have to check my preferences at the door and personify the character I am playing as best I can. Your character isn't who you are. That's the great thing about my job. I get to step into somebody else's shoes – whether that's a pair of flat brogues or some stilettos." — Hilary Swank. [Daily Mail]
• "I'd love to have kids… But I'm much to young to get married." — Shakira. [Gatecrasher]
• "The funny thing is that I was very open and honest about [my bisexuality] from the very beginning, and everyone was acting like it was some new trend. Go back four or five years, people, and you'll see the same answer. I've been very honest with him from the get-go. I think women are beautiful. I've had a lot of fun with women, and I'm not ashamed of it. The problem is that I also love a well-endowed man. But just because I enjoy women doesn't mean I'm allowed to have affairs in my relationship. I learned through talking with my therapist that it is still cheating even if it's with girls, so there is a rule there." — Fergie. [Us Magazine via The Advocate, Page Six]
• "Lady Gaga stole your act." — President Obama to Cyndi Lauper. [La Dolce Musto]

In the December issue, we learn all about what men are really thinking. Or rather, what Cosmo editors pretending to be guys think men are really thinking. The article "Guy Love Diaries" ostensibly features relationship journals from two real men, but we have a hard time believing "Paul, 29" used the term "BFF." Also, he writes:

"When girls get together at showers and bachelorette parties, they usually talk about boys and swap sex techniques. Sara always comes back with new sex tricks and great fellatio.

How could a man know that "wedding shower" is really code for "getting sex tips from Grandma and Aunt Janet?"

In both guys' diaries, they mention that they like it when women pig out in front of them, but stay skinny. Cosmo explains:

"Men fear they will marry a gorgeous girl, and then a couple of years later, she'll let herself go and put on 100 pounds. If you're not eating in front of him, he's nervous about what might happen when you let your guard down later on.

Josh Duhamel must have been terrified when Fergie had to gain 17 pounds for her role in Nine. Yet curiously, he didn't stop loving her! Fergie's secret?: "In Italy, Catholic boys are raised to believe that there are two types of women: the Madonna and the whore. And me? I'm both."

That may work for pop stars, but Cosmo advises you drop the whole "Madonna" thing in the bedroom. There's one dirty move guys "crave" and "you're gonna want to drop the magazine and do it on the spot." Thing is, it isn't actually a "move"; guys just "want to be wanted." Tips? Try sneaking up behind your boyfriend while he's on the phone and grabbing his penis, putting lotion on your nipples and dragging them across his chest, or taking his dick to "massage his tip all over your upper body — lips, cheeks, breasts — all while maintaining eye contact." That should give him a hint.

(Click to enlarge.)

• Jennifer Lopez is suing her ex-husband Ojani Noa for $10 million and demanding he stop production of the film How I Married Jennifer Lopez, which includes video of the couple in "sexual situations" on their honeymoon.

• A judge has granted a temporary restraining order blocking distribution of the film until the next hearing, which is scheduled for tomorrow. [Reuters, AP]
• Michael Lohan has released another taped phone call. This one is between Michael and Lindsay Lohan's former assistant, Jenni Muro, who says she thinks Lindsay may hurt herself. Muro says she wants to quit because, "I am trying to save your daughter's life every day," but, "I don't want it on my watch either" if she does kill herself. She also calls Lindsay's relationship with Samantha Ronson "unhealthy" and "an addiction." [Radar Online]
• Jenni Muro says she's planning on sending Michael Lohan a cease and desist letter for secretly taping their conversations. She calls his behavior "way beyond low." [TMZ]
• The Consumer Product Safety Commission says Jon Gosselin should have never let his five-year-olds on his ATV because, "Children under 6 should never be on an ATV — either as a driver or a passenger... Children are involved in about one-third of all ATV-related deaths and hospital emergency room injuries." [Radar Online]
• Jon Gosselin is counter suing TLC for $5 million. [Radar Online]
• Justin Timberlake's lawyer was furious in court today that a judge is demanded JT testify in court if he wants his restraining order against alleged stalker Marty Singer made permanent. He says Justin is currently filming a movie and can't miss a day to appear in court. [TMZ]
• The judge granted Justin Timberlake a permanent restraining order after his lawyer submitted a written declaration from Justin. [TMZ]
• In the video at the link, stripper Nicole Forrester is shown taking the polygraph test, which supposedly found she's telling the truth about sleeping with Josh Duhamel. She says, "I honestly didn't know he was married... I said, 'Are you Fergie's husband?' He was like, 'Don't ask me any personal questions. You know what you know so let's just drop it.'" [Radar Online]
• Fergie and Josh Duhamel spent the weekend apart because she was working in the U.K., so clearly their marriage is on the rocks. [Us]
• Jermaine Dupri and Janet Jackson are back together and there are rumors that they're planning a wedding, but he says, "They've been saying that for years and you don't see a ring on my finger... I guess it just sounds good to have that rumor this time of the year or something." [People]
• Just so you know, Jackie Jackson say's Dr. Arnie Klein's admission that Michael Jackson liked to pee in cups in front of other people is not true. [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson's former doctors are feuding. Dr. Steven Hoefflin says Dr. Arnold Klein, "knew Michael was a narcotic addict yet he repeatedly injected him, probably with others in his office assisting him, 51 times over three months with a minimum of 100mg of Demerol and charged him a large amount of money." [TMZ]
• Madonna is heading to Rio to visit the city's slums. State Governor Sergio Cabral says, "She will get to know some social projects; she is enchanted with Rio and wants to help." [Reuters]
• The manager of Guy Richie's London pub The Punch Bowl is asking Richie's celebrity friends to sign a petition to keep the bar open to fight local residents who say the bar is too noisy. [Daily Express]
• In her new book Carrie Prejean accuses Miss California USA director Keith Lewis of pushing her to get a boob job and says he ran his hands all over her body and examined her breasts while she was standing in Shanna Moakler's living room in a bikini in front of other pageant judges. [Radar Online]
• Oksana Grigorieva says Mel Gibson is a "very hands-on" father to their newborn daughter. "He has been very dtoing and nurturing," she says. [People]
• Paris Hilton is threatening to sue a New Zealand company for advertising empty billboard space by posting her picture with the word "vacant" stamped across it. [Daily Express]
• Russell Brand is selling his London home and you can check out pictures of the interior here: [London Brick Work]
• Ashee Simpson will play Roxie Hart in the Broadway production of Chicago for six weeks starting in December. She has already played the role in London. [People]
• John Travolta says that, since his son Jett's death, "We've been working very hard every day as a family to heal... We have our own way of doing it, and it has been helping." Kelly Preston says the family has been receiving an "outpouring of love from, really, worldwide. It's been our friends, our family, our church. We partake in spiritual counseling pretty much daily." [ET]
• Rihanna made a surprise appearance last night at Jay-Z's concert at UCLA. Watch it here: [Perez Hilton]
• Kristen Stewart says since she started filming of New Moon Taylor Lautner has, "Literally become a different person. He's just grown up. He's so confident and the nicest guy that I've ever met. I know that I'm using this grammatically incorrect but he's the funnest guy I've ever hung out with. So he's great. I'm so proud of him." [People]
• Taylor Lautner was asked if it's weird to date Taylor Swift because they have the same name. "It gets confusing definitely," he said. "And it's weird calling somebody your name." [Extra]
• Backstage at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame 25th Anniversary Concert Art Garfunkel asked for a tissue. A staffer said they were running late but could stop in a bathroom. "He literally stopped walking and refused to go another step until he got a tissue," a source said. "He was behaving like such a child. He was very agitated and angry. And this is a guy who's been busted for marijuana possession! Shouldn't he be calmer?" He was offered a paper towel but threw it back yelling, "I said a tissue!" [Radar Online]
• Ryan Seacrest's alleged stalker, Chidi Uzomah, sent the campus of Cal State Dominquez Hills into a panic last year when he walked around in camouflage holding a dummy rifle after ROTC training. [TMZ]
• The Disney Channel has ordered a second season of Jonas, the Jonas Brother's show. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Kate Winslet has been nominated for a European Film Award for The Reader. [Daily Express]
• When asked if the rumors that she's starring in Resident Evil: Afterlife are true Eva Mendes said, "God, no! No, no, no! Never!" [Daily Express]
• Though it was assumed that Joe Halderman would try to make a plea agreement in the David Letterman extortion case, his lawyer said, "there's nothing in the pipeline other than preparing a case for trial." [N.Y. Observer]
• Tiffani Theissen and her husband, Brady Smith, are expecting their first baby in May. [People]
• Maksim Chmerkovskiy has already been voted off DWTS, but he advises, "Mya needs to step it up because she has been a frontrunner the whole time and now she's kind of ‘pfft.'" [People]
• Lamar Odom was in a car accident in 2007 and offered the victim a settlement, but she refused and has filed a lawsuit against him. [TMZ]
• A judge has ruled that Warren Beatty can go ahead with his lawsuit against the Tribune Co over the right to the Dick Tracy comic strip. [Reuters]
• Mario Lopez introduced his girlfriend Courtney Mazza to his mom at a recent dinner in San Diego. "Everyone was laughing and having a good time," says an eyewitness. "There was never an awkward moment." [Star]
• W editor Kevin West said during her cover shoot Demi Moore, "was like a newlywed in love, talking about how wonderful [Ashton] was and how much the relationship meant to her. She basically said when they met it was love at first sight." [W]
• Jennie Garth says her character won't break up Debbie and Harry Wilson on 90210. "I'm not a big fan of that storyline," she said. "It's just bizarre and weird. I don't think it's going to go anywhere. I'm not going to let Kelly be a homewrecker, so there's no place for it to really go." [E!]
• Leighton Meester says she's never been intimidated by fashion. "My mother always had a great sense of style. I always looked up to her. Ever since [Gossip Girl] I can differentiate between the character and myself. It gave me a launching point to develop my own sense of style," she says. [W]
• Peter Andre is still mad at Jordan for revealing that she had an abortion during their marriage. "Pete has always been passionately anti-abortion and Jordan knows that," says a source. "It's terrible she feels the need to talk about this so publicly. It drags up a whole lot of emotions for Pete when he just wants to move on. Pete keeps thinking about those lost children." [News Of The World]
• Sophia Loren says of working with Daniel Day-Lewis on Nine, "Daniel is incredible. He is hypnotic, magical, beautiful and brilliant; but he is also very scary. Every time I did a scene with him he was so deep and so real that it was almost intimidating." [Daily Express]
• Last night's third-season finale of Mad Men drew 2.32 million viewers, making it the most watched finale in the show's history. [Media Week]
• In an interview with John Slattery and Talia Balsam, who are married in real life and divorced on Mad Men, Slattery says it's different working with your spouse because, "You don't have to create a history – we did that scene where I have a heart attack, she comes in and I mean I fell apart because you're pretending to have a heart attack, it's supposed to be scary, you conjure up whatever it is that's going to get you to that place, then Talia walks in and if someone who wasn't Talia walked in playing my wife, it probably wouldn't have been as emotional." [If Magazine]
• Jon Hamm says, "A lot of people, especially this season, are very frustrated and angry with Don and his choices and his decisions. But something to understand about the guy is he's significantly damaged... I do think he loves his family very much. I think he's hard time expressing — or at least maintaining — that and still be true to himself. It's a difficult line to walk. What I enjoy about him as an actor is walking that line. And that's what makes it difficult to watch as a viewer. You're by turns transfixed and repulsed by this guy." [AMC]

• Maybe all those hysterical parents were right about Marilyn Manson. In his latest video he violently beats a woman who looks like his ex-girlfriend Evan Rachel Wood, then leaves her bloody, dead body in a bathtub.

• You can check out the video for "Running To The Edge Of The World" here, if you must: [Perez Hilton]
• Sharon Osbourne said of Susan Boyle: "I like everybody to do well. Even somebody that looks like a slapped arse. God bless her. It's like, ‘You go girl'. She does look like a hairy arsehole... [God] gave her the talent. Yes he did. [And] he hit her with a fucking ugly stick." [BlackBook Magazine]
• Kate Gosselin has the kids for Thanksgiving so Jon Gosselin will be eating with Hailey Glassman. "My family and I would never let him eat Thanksgiving dinner alone in an apartment," said Hailey. "He's coming to our house for Thanksgiving. I don't care." Then she bickered with Jon and informed him that he's "not doing my family any favors," by coming. [Us]
• TLC is planning on calling some bombshell witnesses in their case against Jon Gosselin. The court has allowed the network's lawyer to depose Hailey Glassman, Jon's bodyguard, Jon's former lawyer Mark Heller, and Michael Lohan. [Radar Online]
• Stripper Nicole Forrester says she and Josh Duhamel "had lots of sex" at a hotel after he came into her strip club while he was married to Fergie. Her lawyer adds, "They fell asleep together, and he kept waking her up to have more sex." [Us]
• Josh Duhamel has issued a statement about the cheating allegations saying, "This is not the first nor will it be the last time that a stripper was paid a large amount of money to sell a false story about a celebrity. This story is absolutely ridiculous. It is unfortunate that we have to respond to a story that was created because money was exchanged between a tabloid and this woman." [ET]
• Fergie says: "These allegations are nonsense." [ET]
• Fergie had to gain a little weight for Nine and she says Josh Duhamel, "was excited. He enjoys having both: the extra meat to grab when it's there and the tight stomatch when that's there." [Us]
• Beyonce will perform in Egypt for the first time on Friday, but Islamic conservatives are calling her show an "insolent sex party" that threatens the Muslim nation's "social peace and stability." [USA Today]
• Authorities in Malawi threatened to arrest protesters blocking the construction of Madonna's girls school. The 140 villagers are demanding more money for the land the government leased to her charity Raising Malawi. [Reuters]
• Adidas has ended their $3 million sponsorship deal with the University of Central Florida because Michael Jordan's son, Marcus Jordan, wore his father's brand of Nike shoes to an exhibition game last night. [ABC News]
• The jury in the John Travolta extortion trial had enough votes to convict Pleasant Bridgewater and Tarino Lightbourne before the judge declared a mistrial. [Radar Online]
• Keith Lewis, executive director of the Miss California USA organization, is writing a Carrie Prejean tell-all book titled Pageant Bitch. [Perez Hilton]
• Sources say when Miss California USA officials started playing Carrie Prejean's X-rated tape she said, "that's disgusting," then insisted it wasn't her... until the camera panned up to her face. [TMZ]
• U2 is performing in Berlin to mark the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall, but people are upset because a two meter wall barrier was built around the venue to keep those without tickets out. [BBC]
• Rue McClanahan has been hospitalised after suffering from acute cardiac illness. A tribute to Rue that was planned for November 14 had to be cancelled. "My darlings, I'm just devastated that I am going to have to miss my own tribute at the Castro Theatre," she said. "Unfortunately, my doctor has laid down the law, and I'm currently having some maintenance on the old ticker. Trust me, I'd much rather be in San Francisco having fun and being adored by all of you." [ONTD]
• Adam Lambert just broke up with Drake LaBry and he already has a new boyfriend: singer/songwriter Ferras Alqaisi, who worked with him on his new album. [Star]
• Emmy Rossum Tweeted: "Just saw the first half of the interview of Diane Sawyer speaking to Rihanna about domestic violence. She speaks honestly, bravely... So many of my friends have experienced this, it's very close to my heart. I urge young women - & really women of any age - to watch it... If someone is hurting you, or has hurt you, I urge you to tell someone. Do not be afraid to come forward,tell your friends, tell your family." [Perez Hilton]
• Sources say Debbie Rowe is headed back to court because in the four months since Michael Jackson died she hasn't seen their kids. [Showbiz 411]
• ANTM's Sundai declared winning the competition was "more important than living" so naturally people were worried about her when she was elminated last night. She says, "I'm OK now. It's funny how many people called me and said, "Oh my god, it was so sad...are you OK?" [E!]
• Could Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami be fake?! Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian claimed NBA star Rashad McCants cheated on Khloe after they hacked into his voice mail and found messages left by a female fan. But McCants said they "made the whole thing up" because they didn't have his phone number and had "already called it quits" when the segment was taped in January. [Us]
• Levi Johnston is demanding a retraction from NBC because he claims the Tweets that William Shatner read last night on the Tonight Show were fake and that he did not write "anybody know where I can get some good weed?" [TMZ]
• Elton John has left the hospital after being treated for the flu and a "serious case" of e. coli infection. [People]
• Demi Lovato Tweets: "There's been a lot of rumors lately that I'm dating one of my best friends Joe [Jonas]. I can promise my entire career that I am not. It's unfortunate that some people out there are so desperate for attention that they have to make up gossip to keep their site alive." [People]
• Uma Thurman says she's excited about training again for the third Kill Bill movie. She says: "They train you so hard that when you come to shooting, it's actually quite comfortable. It's not the same as real kung-fu, and I could not defend myself now if someone picked a fight! It was a transforming experience; I was part of a fight team for almost nine months, and that changed my life. They taught me to work harder than I had ever done before, physically, and it's an incredible thing to discover that your breaking point is actually much higher than you think. It's a great gift." [Daily Express]
• "I thought I was going to be one of those easy-going brides," says Jenna Fisher. "I never really thought about it. Whatever … a piece of paper, words – send it out." But then she went to the store to buy wedding invitations. "Three hours I sat there with the all the books," she says. "I turned into a crazy person. My fiancé was like, 'What about the slap it on the piece of paper with crayon and send it out?' But now I'm pouring over the paper quality!" [People]
• Will Smith's first marriage in 1992 ended in divorce and he says it's "Probably the most painful loss of my life. I quit. I could have fixed it. It really was not that bad. With Jada, I stood up in front of God and my family and friends and said, 'Till death do us part.' So there are two possible outcomes: we are going to be together till death or I am dead." [Daily Express]
• Chiwetel Ejifor, who stars in 2012 says, "When I started reading the script it was impossible to put it down. The film is incredibly fast-paced but doesn't sacrifice any of the moral or characteristic drama that is necessary to work in conjunction with all the epic destruction and CGI stuff." [The Telegraph]
• Bret McKenzie says he's not sure if Flight of the Conchords will come back for a third season, "and if we do it will take a while because we need to write a lot of material," he said, explaining that it could take "ten years," and not for the whole season. "That's for one episode. So to do a season of say six episodes, would take 60 years. We could be getting very old." [The Independent]
• Patricia Clarkson says of her new film Cairo Time, "I've always been the secondary, the tertiary character. And now here I am, playing not just a wife, but the Wife. You know, move aside, boys. And if I can be vain about it, it's a real treat to play a lovely, enticing, sexual woman. But it required so much of me. It was kind of brave of Ruba to really write this part for an actress of my age, 49." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Were you aware that Mariah Carey had to make herself look uglier in Precious? "I had to lose all vanity," Carey said. "I had to change my demeanor, my inside, layers of who I am, to become that woman." [L.A.T.]
• Vincent Kartheiser says Mad Men co-star Elisabeth Moss' wedding to Fred Armisen was, "Not a lot of hoopla and waiting around. Really simple and beautiful. Elisabeth said stuff that made me cry... They were really just speaking to each other and the people they loved." Christina Hendricks' wedding to Geoffrey Arend "was much smaller" he says, "Everyone seemed to know each other. I also cried in that wedding!" [Us]

• Lindsay Lohan is taking legal action against Michael Lohan, who has been talking about kidnapping her and putting her in rehab. Her lawyer says she's seeking a restraining order and may file a defamation lawsuit against him. [TMZ]

• Sales for Chris Brown's comeback tour are pitiful. He used to sell out 20,000 seat arenas, but after tickets went on sale this weekend for 1,000-2,5000 seat venues many are still available. [Perez Hilton]
• At the link is a preview of Chris Brown's MTV interview that airs on Friday (hours before Rihanna's 20/20 interview). Chris says of the assault, "What was I thinking?" [MTV]
• Mariah Carey says she "can't imagine" what Rihanna went through when Chris Brown beat her. "I was very sequestered, as you know, when I first started out and if I were just allowed to be young and with a young boyfriend who's also a star and you know, you're working and you're both — I don't know what goes on," she says. "You know what I mean? So it's like, I wasn't really allowed out of the house, so I can't imagine what she went through." [Us]
• No Doubt is suing the makers of the video game Band Hero because they say they only authorized the use of their likenesses to play three No Doubt songs, but the game has "transformed No Doubt band members into a virtual karaoke circus act" by having them "sing, dance and perform over sixty songs." They're also mad because Gwen Stefani's avatar can sing with a man's voice and perform the song "Honkey Tonk Woman," which has lyrics about sleeping with prostitutes. [TMZ]
• Reps for Josh Duhamel and Fergie deny that he cheated on her saying, "This is not the first nor will it be the last time that a stripper was paid a large amount of money to sell a false story about a celebrity... This story is absolutely ridiculous." [People]
• Britney Spears paid $1.32 million in the past seven months to the lawyers who represented her conservatorship. [TMZ]
• Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are on the cover of Harper's Bazaar (despite him also being on this month's Vanity Fair). Kristen says, "Rob can barely jump rope," and this has inspired her nickname for him. "I call him Flippy because when he does his stunt rehearsals, he flips around," she says, imitating a penguin's walk. "And God, when he tries to run..." She also calls Flippy's singing "heartbreaking." [Us]
• When asked about her romance with Robert Pattinson again, Kristen Stewart told Entertainment Weekly, "I've thought about this a lot... There's no answer that's not going to tip you one way or the other. Think about every hypothetical situation: ‘Okay, we are. We aren't. I'm a lesbian.' I'm just trying to keep something. If people started asking me if I was dating Taylor, I'd be like ‘Fuck off!' I would answer the exact same way." [Entertainment Weekly]
• Sean Penn's 16-year-old son Hopper Jack won't face drug charges following his arrest last week because police have determined the pills he was carrying were actually prescription medication in his name. [Radar Online]
• Though Winona Ryder recently told BlackBook Magazine that she never got a thank you from Angelina Jolie for getting her the role in Girl, Interrupted that launched her career, Angie did thank her — in her Oscar acceptance speech. [L.A.T.]
• The National Enquirer claims Jennifer Lopez is fighting with her ex-husband Ojani Noa, who wants to release 11 hours of home movies that show her fighting with her mother, "playing sexy bedroom games," and staring at her butt in a mirror. [National Enquirer]
• Penny Marshall has been diagnosed with a brain tumor and secretly underwent brain surgery last week. This story is from the National Enquirer, so hopefully it's not true. [National Enquirer]
• Dennis Hopper says he's being treated prostate cancer with "an experimental thing at USC." He said it's "no big deal" and he "feels great." [TMZ]
• Though Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman say they broke up, they went out to a Manhattan bar on Halloween. "Staff were ordered to keep the fake Jons away from him," said a source. "Someone asked to take a picture but he said he wanted to be left alone. Once the crowds were away he and Hailey looked like a normal couple." [Us]
• Jessica Simpson and Dolly Parton are bonding over their big boobs. Dolly Tweeted: "Aahhh chiropractor... Hurts so good :-) you lug these around and see if your back don't hurt!" Jess replied: "Amen sister :)." [CNN]
• Yet another creditor's claim against Michael Jackson's estate: Atkins Thomson Solicitors in London is asking for $209,204.36 for advising MJ on the sale of Neverland. [TMZ]
• Sadie Frost says of Jude Law, "We're continuing to have a very close relationship and I'm here to support him as a friend. That won't stop. He's a wonderful person and I'll stand by him forever. For all the silliness and difficulties, we've always really cared for each other and we're both a hundred per cent committed to the kids and doing the right thing by them. Everything's fine." [Daily Express]
• The terms of the settlement between Carrie Prejean and Miss California USA have been leaked. The Pageant will pay $100,000 directly to paying her lawyers and publicists, and Carrie gets nothing but the organization's promise not to fight her for writing a book without permission. [TMZ]
• Carrie Prejean was demanding more than a million dollars in her settlement negotiations with Pageant officials, until they revealed that they have a XXX home video of Prejean that has never been released publicly. [TMZ]
• Looks like the lawsuits may be back on. Carrie Prejean's lawyer says she may sue because of the sex tape rumor. "It seems as if someone has acted in an unethical and unlawful manner by even raising this issue," said her lawyer. "We are weighing our options and if this is a breach of contract we are considering suing for punitive damages." [Radar Online]
• Terrence Howard and Taraji P. Henson insist they are not dating. "I've known her too long. She knows what I'm thinking!" says Howard. [Us]
• Frances Bean Cobain threw a tantrum when she found out there was a problem with her train ticket from Boston to New York. A source says: "She caused a huge backup on the line because she refused to pay herself. She was causing a scene and saying her name loudly to the guy behind the counter, but he had no idea who she was. Finally, she got out of line to call her business manager, who paid for her ticket." [Daily Express]
• Katy Perry says she's gotten some tips on hosting the MTV European Music Awards from her boyfriend Russell Brand, who hosted the VMAs. "We're stepping on each others turfs. I've learned a couple of things from Russell over the last months that might not be appropriate for this!" she said. [The Sun]
• Porn star Janine Lindemulder, who is fighting her ex Jesse James and Sandra Bullock over custody of her 5-year-old daughter, says she wants to sit down with Bullock as "two women" because, "It hurts tremendously, the accusation, especially from Sandra... Even more so because we've never sat down and talked. You know, that's the one thing that I wish more than anything, for a remedy for what's happening here, is just communication." [ABC News]
• Liz Hurley has launched a line of organic foods like oat and fruit bars and jerky. "It's compulsory portion control. I've never been able to chop a Jaffa Cake in half and just eat one piece," she said. [Style.com]
• A 27 foot-tall firework-filled effigy of Katie Price will be burned this weekend in England. [The Mirror]
• Robbie Williams says he though he was destined to remain a bachelor until he met American actress Ayda Field. He said: "I thought I was going to be a bachelor ... I was introduced to Ayda and things just changed - she's a wonderful person and I'm in love." [The Mirror]
• David Spade says he doesn't regret resurrecting a scene from Tommy Boy featuring Chris Farley for a DirecTV ad. Chris' brother Kevin Farley added that the commercial is "an honor to my brother." [TMZ]
• Mischa Barton says: "I'm just figuring out what my next move will be and really looking at a lot of different projects and figuring out what I want to do," now that The Beautiful Life has been cancelled. [Us]
• Farrah Fawcett's college boyfriend Greg Lott told Inside Edition that he and Farrah had rekindled their relationship and were together for the last 11 years, but Ryan O'Neal kept him from her funeral. [UPI]
• Jennifer Hudson says she's not done having kids. "Maybe one more. I'd like to have at least one more, a little girl," says Hudson. "I want a girl and then maybe another one. You know, one baby at a time." [People]
• Natalie Portman says of the role of the short shelf life imposed on actresses, "You see people who were stars five years ago and already they're waning... As actresses approach 40, it starts becoming really, really difficult." [People]
• At the link is a short film made by Richard Heene which shows the Henne family driving down a deserted road in a Jeep, and Heene playing the harmonica while a woman dances on the roof of the car." [Radar Online]
• The Kardashians charity boxing event went awry when Rob Kardashian's mask fell off and he had to be taken to the hospital. Kim Kardashian made it out with just a black eye. [E!]
• When Oprah Winfrey asked Hilary Swank if she plans to marry her boyfriend of three years John Campisi she said, "It's not something we're talking about... I don't know. We'll see." [People]
• Ryan Seacrest's production company is developing a show called Bank of Hollywood in which rich Hollywood celebrities will take pitches from ordinary people who need cash, ranging from people raising money for charity to a grad student who can't afford a ring to propose to his girlfriend. "The idea's simple," Seacrest said. "We are giving away tons of money to everyday people to alleviate the stress of today's climate and have fun." [Live Feed]
• When asked if she would like to marry Mel Gibson, Oksana Grigorieva said, "Yes, but right now we're just so happy to be having this child together." [People]
• Debi Mazar says, "Madonna and I have been friends for almost three decades — dear friends... Our children have had play dates, and we will always be friends." [Us]
• Barry Gibb of The Bee Gees says he and his brother Robin Gibb are, "Like a non-violent version of Oasis... The competition between Robin and I is so strong, we both want attention so badly, that it actually brings something better out of both of us. It's like a basketball team, one player is pushing the other to rise to a different level. If I didn't have Robin to compete with, I wouldn't be able to do what I do." [The Telegraph]
• Jeremy Piven's rep says his recent comments on growing man boobs were taken out of context. "[Piven's comment] was taken from a silly Q&A piece that he did for a U.K. [movie] magazine called Empire," said his rep. Piven's rep. "They asked him, 'How much is a pint of milk?' to which he responded, 'I don't have a clue.' He said he used to drink soy milk, found out it had too much estrogen, made a funny remark about growing breasts and that was it." [TV Guide]
• Anti-rape activist Gabrielle Union says of the Richmond gang rape case: "I'm sad more than anything. After googling the gang rape story in Richmond and reading comments on blogs, it just leaves me sickened and really sad. The fact that race and socio-economics have been used to explain away a brutal gang rape...just sad...maybe I just have seen every kind of rapist and survivor...every race, color, religion, socio-economic status group...it's all the same...a lack of regard for violence against women. Tolerated, and in this case encouraged by the mob surrounding the perps...laughing, joking and taking pics." [Shakesville]
• Dustin Hoffman says his favorite memory of the New York Public Library is, "It's the first place I ever got laid... It was in the nonfiction section in 1958." When asked if he was being serious he replied, "I wasn't serious, but she was." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Alec Baldwin said he's heard about less than 5,000 people watching 30 Rock when it premiered in Germany. "It was so low that we didn't even have a rating," he said. "We didn't even get one rating point... We have work to do in Germany." [N.Y.T.]
• Alec Baldwin started a rumor about Julianne Moore guest starring on 30 Rock by saying, "I won't say who it is, but someone very near to us who may be coming on to play my girlfriend for four episodes," while standing near her on the red carpet. [E!]
• Hugh Jackman praised the the two men taking over as Oscar hosts this year, Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin, saying, "They are both fantastic. Steve actually gave me a lot of funny hints last year ... I rang him and he was really helpful. He is really funny and he knows what he's doing. He's done this before. Alec Baldwin is also a true genius. I think the both of them together have hosted Saturday Night Live like 100 times, so you know they must be funny." [N.Y. Magazine]
• "Living in New York, I feel stronger and more like a woman than ever before. In high school, it was like, what power do I have - I have long blonde hair, you know? But working as hard as I do now, I feel a sense of power and respect, too. And I've learned an incredible amount about fashion on Gossip Girl. Clothes are a personal expression, and my style is as ever-changing as I am: I'm growing, maturing, developing, I'm going through new things in my life, and with that, what I choose to wear changes." — Blake Lively [Just Jared]
• When UK Glamour asked Leighton Meester if she's a "good girlfriend," she said, "I don't know... it's not really the goal of my existence." [ONTD]
• Woody Allen has explained how you can tell whether one of his films is good or bad. "If I look at the film and it's no good, I don't like to give it an aggressive title, I give it ... the kind of title that is low-key and promises nothing, so people are less disappointed by it." As for his next film You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger he says, "Well, that was a very aggressive title, so you can hope that it's a good movie. If I didn't think it was a good film, I would give it a quiet one-word title to deflect attention from it - so now you know the secret." [N.Y. Magazine]

• Nicole Kidman to British GQ: "I've explored obsession. I've explored loss and love in terms of being in a grief-stricken place, I've explored strange sexual fetish stuff…"

"…I've explored the mundane aspect of marriage, and monogamy." She glosses right over that sexual fetish stuff and talks about marriage: "You work on it," she says. "It's a very extraordinary, adventurous place to be: incredibly raw, incredibly dangerous and you're very much out at sea. You're exposed. You could drown. When you commit to someone like that, you live and die together by that decision." Oh! And: "I became famous very young. I became very famous because I was the wife of somebody. I did a lot of good, worthwhile work in Australia between the ages of 14 and 19 and then I married someone famous. And really, despite the huge profile that brought to me, I was still finding my feet. I know my agents at the time were like 'Do not get married! It will ruin your career!' and I was like 'But I'm in love.' All I know is that I wasn't someone interested in fame. And that's not why I got married. I wanted to work with people who intrigued me." [Daily Mail via GQ]

• Nicole Kidman may have crazy info about her 10-year marriage to Tom Cruise, but she's not talking: "I have never discussed the intricacies of it and I never will," she says. "I am not writing a book. I will go to my grave with all my secrets, all my stories." [Telegraph]
• Brad Pitt says his motorcycle crash was "a little mishap." He explains: "No injuries, except my ego. I was trying to get away from some paparazzi and instead gave them a good story. It was my favorite bike, so that is really sad." He's in Tokyo right now, and he says he will "definitely be looking at motorcycles" while there. [AP]
• Ladies and gentlemen, your Oscar hosts are Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin. What say you of these choices? I like Baldwin, though I can't recall the last time I saw him — or Martin, for that matter — in a movie. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Alec Baldwin on hosting the Oscars: "I got lucky. Today's my lucky day." [NY Mag]
• Speaking of Alec Baldwin, that Lil' Wayne cake his daughter had for her birthday was not his idea. [NY Mag]
• Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have requested to do press separately for New Moon. An insider says: "They want to avoid being seen together. Any time they're photographed in the same place, the rumor mill just starts all over again, and that makes the paparazzi hound them even more. They requested to do things apart so the scrutiny around them will be a little less intense." OK, which has already claimed ENGAGED!, WEDDING and SPLIT! will have to find a new angle. [Gatecrasher]
• Chris Martin's publicist says the married Coldplay frontman did not, repeat, NOT make out with Kate Bosworth, though a tabloid recently reported otherwise. [UPI]
• Nicolas Cage is suing his former money manager for $20 million but sources say Nic is a compulsive spender who bought houses, motorcycles, a jet, yachts, vintage and new cars, expensive watches, meteorites, dinosaur skulls, an enormous pet collection, massive amounts of jewelry for the women in his life, group vacations for his entire entourage, and on and on and on. "He lived like a sheik," an insider says. "Spent money like it was water." Click here for a gallery of his pricey assets. [The Daily Beast]
• Roman Polanski has re-appealed to the Swiss courts to be released from prison on bail. [NY Post]
• Why was Sean Penn's 16-year-old son arrested at school last week? Drugs. [Radar Online]
• Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman went to dinner on Halloween and there were people dressed up as Jon in the restaurant. Awkward! [Page Six]
• Did Jon Gosselin orchestrate Hailey Glassman's tearful confessions so they could get paid? [NY Daily News]
• Josh Duhamel says he did NOT cheat on Fergie and have a one night stand with a stripper from Atlanta. The stripper, Nicole Forrester, told an Atlanta radio station: "We did hook up and had lots of sex and we had a really, really good time." [People]
• The folks at Radar Online gave the stripper, Nicole Forrester, a polygraph test and she passed. An expert says "One of those questions was had she had sex with Josh Duhamel. And she answered yes." [Radar Online]
• Russell Brand is a changed man, thanks to Katy Perry. Or as this paper puts it, "The dinkle is dormant… except for his girlfriend." [The Sun]
• An insider says that Ashlee Simpson was kicked off of Melrose Place because "she was a total diva on set, late all the time, and deeply disliked by fellow cast members. t created a lot of discord among the cast." Oh, and "she could barely act. [Fox 411]
• Frances Bean Cobain caused a scene at an Amtrak counter. Dare we say like mother like daughter? [Page Six]
• So the reason a young boy could describe Michael Jackson's penis in the 1993 molestation case is not because he was molested but because MJ liked to pee in front of people? Makes sense, sorta, and yet: Do Not Want. [EW]
• David Hasselhoff has launched a new online series, Mitch Winehouse's Showbiz Rant. Yeah, Amy Winehouse's dad has a show. [Mirror]
• DJ AM's home in Beverly Hills is on the market, so if you'd like a four bedroom place with a lushly landscaped backyard with pool and spa — and you have $3,795,000 — act now. [Real Estalker]
• Bruce Springsteen is "quietly working" on his autobiography, which could be "the biggest rock music autobiography of all time." [NY Post]
• At the ACE awards, Lady Gaga left baby powder on Marc Jacobs' blazer. [NY Daily News]
• No one cares about Gossip Girl anymore. [NY Daily News]
• Kerry Washington is making her Broadway debut in David Mamet's play Race and says: "I had been missing theater for a long time, so I've been looking for the right play. To make a Broadway debut doing David Mamet and to originate a David Mamet role-this is the kind of shit you tell your kids about." [Village Voice]
• Kate Beckinsale's daughter will play the young version of Kate in a film; Kate says: "The producers harassed me for a long time saying 'can she audition?' and I said no because she would probably be on the set anyway, if she auditions and doesn't get it then she's going to feel horrible. Eventually she got wind of it and asked if she could and she got it fair and square." [Mirror]
• Mario Lopez and his dimples will host the Miss America pageant, which airs on TLC January 30. [AP]
• Sienna Miller is dating someone called DJ Slinky Wizard. [Page Six]
• The Glee cast can't walk in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade since it's an NBC production, so the parade is getting the next best thing: Jimmy Fallon and The Roots. Because that's who kids want to see. [MSNBC Scoop]
• At the link is one of the most distasteful things I have ever read. It's about Ryan Jenkins and a Halloween party. [TMZ]
• On the ABC soap One Life To Live, a gay character this week dumped his fiancé for another man mid-ceremony. [NY Post]
• The scene from Bruno in which LaToya Jackson is "interviewed" — and Bruno tries to get Michael Jackson's number out of her cell phone — will be included in the DVD release as an extra. [People]
• Q: What do you think when people throw the word "Oscar" around?
  A: "It makes me nervous. Because I don't know what an Oscar-winning film is. I don't know what an Oscar-winning actress is, other than the obvious examples — Halle Berry and Kate Winslet and all these people. I can't see it because it's too close to me. I haven't been in this business very long and I don't know what it looks like… If you interview me in two years and I have a couple of Oscars, I probably knocked someone out for [them]." — Precious star Gabby Sidibe. [LA Times]
• "I think we must all remember that the ultimate accessory is the condom." — Lady Gaga. [Page Six]
• "You can't read somebody's diary. You shouldn't read it. I burnt most of my journals after I remarried… You're only going to find out bad things." — Nicole Kidman. [Daily Mail via British GQ]
• "I can't keep always playing long-haired, scruffy men, otherwise my career would be limited. I was hoping one day to play Napoleon, but I can't play Napoleon as this shaggy-haired, bearded raconteur. But I did also want to play Rasputin, so that'll be good, I can look like this." — Russell Brand might cut his hair so he can get film roles. [The Star]
• "I do not believe in diets. I have been on diets in the past, and they are a bunch of bologna. This is a lifestyle change. It's not about being skinny. It's about getting in the best shape that you can be." — Tyra Banks. [Us Magazine]

• No one saw this coming: Jon Gosselin dumped Hailey Glassman on the advice of his spiritual advisor, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach. "They're taking a break," said an insider, "[Jon] decided he needed to spend some time on his own." [Extra]

• Jon Gosselin is trying to connect with his "deeper, more spiritual, more altruistic self" through regular study sessions with Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, who is famous for serving as Michael Jackson's spiritual advisor. Jon said he plans to publicly apologize "in a sacred space to those whom I have hurt" on Sunday at Manhattan's West Side Synagogue. [People]
• Jon Gosselin sent a statement to the producers of Jon - Kate = Jon + Octomom saying that while he "appreciates the consideration and the potential revenues that it offers, after reviewing with both the management team and his spiritual advisors Jon has decided it is not in his best interest to pursue a show of this nature." [TMZ]
• Though Jon Gosselin claims he didn't hear about the show until it was reported in the media, emails between Jon and the producers have surfaced that detail the plot of the show, Hailey Glassman's role, and how much he would be paid. The producers write: "Pretty easy work for a million dollars." [Radar Online]
• The 53-year-old man who said Miley Cyrus sends him secret messages through his TV and was arrested for stalking her will be set free after pleading guilty to two misdemeanors. He has been sentenced to two years probation and must undergo a mental health evaluation. [TMZ]
• Miley Cyrus says of shooting her cameo in Sex and the City 2: Electric Boogaloo, "Literally, I shot for like an hour and a half, and I was done... it was a total dream come true." [People]
• A man accused of stalking Ryan Seacrest has been arrested inside the E! building. [TMZ]
• Seacrest's stalker, Chidi Uzomah, was sentenced to 3 years probation and ordered to stay away from Seacrest after attacking his security guard last month. He had a knife on him today. [TMZ]
• Chidi Uzomah showed up at the KIIS FM radio studio looking for Ryan Seacrest earlier this month and Ryan's people asked the police to arrest him for a parole violation. [TMZ]
• An Ohio prosecutor has dropped the charges against one of the three men accused of spying on Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate because he wants him to testify against the other two. [AP]
• Nicole Richie is seeking a restraining order against the paparazzi who hit her car. [TMZ]
• Paris Hilton's neighbors called the police because she was throwing an incredibly loud party at 4 am, but by the time the police got there at 5 am it was totally quiet. [TMZ]
• Lindsay Lohan's bodyguard was detained yesterday because he tried to cross a police barricade. [TMZ]
• Matthew Morrison of Glee has "almost finalized" a record deal. "It's going to be different. I would consider it a classier Justin Timberlake album," he said. "It's going to be me and a big orchestra, but also with beats." [Access Hollywood]
• Cindy Crawford will guest judge the next episode of Project Runway. [People]
• Eddie Murphy will appear on the season finale of ANTM but he won't be a judge. He'll been supporting his daughter Bria Murphy, who will appear on the show. [E!]
• Vanessa Paradis, Johnny Depp's girlfriend, pushed a photograph on the way out of a Betsey Johnson store and yelled, "Are you mad?!" [ONTD]
• It was revealed on last night's RHOA reunion special that NeNe and Kim's feud is over. [People]
• A source says the rumor that Pamela Anderson is pregnant again are not true. The source says: "She's not pregnant... just happy. She doesn't have to say anything because they (rumours) are not true. She actually gets upset because her kids go to school. Of course, she cares. She's a human being. We're all human." [Daily Express]
• Earlier this week a stripper said she had a fling with Josh Duhamel after he married Fergie. Today a woman in the Air Force called in to a radio show and claimed that he slept with a few other women in the Air Force while he was filming Transformers 2. [Perez Hilton]
• A lady who has intimate knowledge of A-Rod's bedroom reveals "He was so vain. He had not one, but two painted portraits of himself as a centaur. You know, the half man, half horse figure? ... It was ridiculous." [Us]
• The preliminary hearing in the Anna Nicole Smith drug case has concluded and a judge decided there was enough evidence for Howard K. Stern, Dr. Sandeep Kapoor, and Dr. Khristine Eroshevich to stand trial. [TMZ]
• FYI, Dr. Mehmet's Oz's drink is tequila straight. [N.Y. Magazine]
• At the link Jimmy Fallon does another spoof of Robert Pattinson's sulking. [People]
• Steven Soderbergh has written a play about the Caylee Anthony case called Tot Mom that will be staged in Australia in December. [CBS News]
• For his Showtime documentary Poliwood director Barry Levinson followed Anne Hathaway, Susan Sarandon and other politically-active members of the Creative Coalition as they navigated the 2008 political conventions. He says, "I was fascinated at the level of criticism for those celebrities who have some genuine interest in the political process. You try to navigate through this media circus and hopefully don't end up the clown." [W]
• Tom Hanks says he loves Beyonce's "Single Ladies" because that' what he told his wife Rita Wilson when they first met: "I'm gon' put a ring on that finger. I'm gon' take that thing home." [AP]
• Mario Lopez says the persistent rumor that he and Eva Longoria once dated isn't true. "We get asked that a lot but I've known her for a long time and it would seem incestuous," he said. "We're both the same culture, same age, our families both know each other, so we go back. It would be weird. It would never happen." [Daily Express]
• Jude Law's rep says he and Sienna Miller aren't dating. "Jude and Sienna are just friends and are seeing each other socially occasionally as they are both on Broadway, performing just one block apart." [People]
• Michael Buble says he's happy for ex-girlfriend Emily Blunt and her fiance John Krasinski. "We talked and I congratulated her. Emily is amazing, so this guy also has to be," said Buble. [Daily Express]
• "I never expected to make a living at this when I was growing up. My whole career is pretty much by accident." — Weird Al Yankovic [CNN]
• Chaz Bono says that his girlfriend of four years, Jennifer Ella, stood by him through his recent gender reassignment surgery. "She's been amazing," he said, "I feel really grateful to be going through this with a partner." He adds: "Our relationship always modeled a heterosexual relationship, emotionally and intellectually. So now it does physically as well." [People]
• As just about every geeky guy has done at some point, David Beckham is growing a beard to try to look more like Wolverine. He says, "Halloween is coming up and I was thinking of Wolverine from X-Men. It's not some play-off ritual. I'm just lazy and can't be bothered to shave. And everybody keeps telling me to cut it and I'm stubborn." [Ok]
• Victoria Beckham says her solo singing career was a mistake. "People never believed the solo singing career, and it wasn't the real me - I was a little bit lost at the time. I don't mind making mistakes. I just can't live with anyone else's mistakes." [The Mirror]
• On Oprah today Lisa Niemi, Patrick Swayze's wife of 34 years said, "I feel him here. I feel like he hasn't left. I can feel every contour of his hand in mine." [People]

• Victoria Beckham might be adding shoes and accessories to her dress collection, because she's apparently sick of advertising other designers' goods. [Sun]
• Fergie says she wanted her Avon scent to smell "fresh, and yet modern at the same time." [People]

• There is one image from Sonia Rykiel's lingerie collection for H&M on the Internet. The collection, modeled by Caroline Trentini, Anne Vyalitsyna, and Lara Stone, features a lot of rosettes, some in perhaps ill-considered places. (Rosette nipples, anyone?) [Nitrolicious]
• Lady Gaga says during the filming of Beyoncé's video for the upcoming single "Video Phone," she aped Beyoncé's style and choreography so well the crew took to calling her "Gee-yoncé." Gaga also says she and Beyoncé are working on music together next. [People]
• Meanwhile, if anyone were ever destined to receive an Accessories Council Excellence Award, it's Gaga. [WWD]
• Fashion's Night Out: becoming an annual event, according to Mayor Bloomberg. Who should know. [WWD]
• Christian Lacroix says, in this annoying all-caps interview, "THE TRIBUNAL WILL DECIDE ON OCTOBER 27TH WHICH « DOSSIER » THEY'LL FAVOR. FALICS SUBMITED ONE, SOME OTHER FINANCIAL PEOPLE DID TOO AND I CHOSE TO GIVE MY SUPPORT AND SIGNATURE TO THE SHEIKH OF AJMAN WHO SEEMS TO BE THE STRONGEST SOLUTION. WE'LL SEE...WHATEVER WILL BE THE NEWS ON NEXT TUESDAY IT WILL BE A RELIEF." The designer also said, of his house's erstwhile collaborations with Pucci and Hermès, "IT WAS NO MORE POSSIBLE WITH OUR LAST AMERICAN BACKERS. WE'LL SEE WITH THE NEXT. IF I'M STILL PART OF THE VENTURE." If? If? If he's still part of the venture? It's too early in the morning for this heart-rending inconstancy. [UnNouveauIdeal]
• And with that, hearings on the $100 million Emirati bid to take over the house of Lacroix have been delayed until November 17. The bankruptcy judge nonetheless says it is "likely" the sheikh's bid will be the one approved. [AFP]
• Don't expect a Givenchy H&M collection anytime soon. Although the brand put together a capsule collection, at 40% off its regular astronomical pricepoint, for Barneys New York, designer Riccardo Tisci says of mass-market diffusion collaborations, "It's too early. I'm still building the brand, and we want to stay on image." Tisci also revealed he's in New York to work on costumes for a secret show. "I'm here for work on an upcoming show in 2011, which I'm doing all the costumes for. I can't say much more, but the performance is a combination of music and opera, and will travel worldwide. A project like this has been my dream." Sounds intriguing. [Fashionologie]
• Julianne Moore says working with Tom Ford as a director was easy. "Tom is incredibly, incredibly meticulous and has a work ethic like nothing I've ever seen," says the actress. "He works very, very hard and is always very prepared and cares about every tiny detail." [People]
• Eric Ripert, chef of Le Bernardin, on Roberto Cavalli's habit of sitting down at Italian restaurant Serafina and ordering from Manana, the Mexican place next door: "I would find that very insulting. And I won't let him! It's like me going to Roberto Cavalli and then asking the designer next door to bring a dress for my wife, and then dress her in his boutique. I would not do that. I would go to Hermès." Burn, Cavalli! [Grub Street]
• The Sun has its nose out of joint about the press copy accompanying Kate Moss's new perfume. "The fragrance opens with illuminating pink pepper, white freesia and invigorating mandarin. Warm base notes of tonka bean, vanilla and skin musks add a depth and refinement," is kind of disgustingly over-the-top as PR speak goes. But anything that prompts a cranky old Englishman to write the words "Nobel Prize for shit-erature" goes back to being OK in our book. [Sun]
• Steve Madden, everybody's favorite just-like-the-runway-but-made-of-pleather-and-still-over-$100 shoemaker, is getting into the clothing business. It will be women's wear, made under license, and expect to see its "Bohemian flair" in department stores early next year. [Crains]
• There's now a bullshit term for world leaders wearing jeans: Power Jeans. [WSJ]
• And there's a new bullshit term for idiotically priced jeans, too. $300-and-up denim will no longer be known by that hideous pre-recession term, "Premium Jeans." It is, instead, "Artisanal Jeans." [NYTimes]
• Ellen Von Unwerth says, of her favorite shot, "I took this maybe three years ago, on a fashion shoot for Italian Vogue. We developed a romantic story to go with it: a woman comes back to the place where she grew up, and finds it all dusty and falling apart. We shot it in a chateau in Paris. The girl was a model, and it was the only time I worked with her. After this, she disappeared. She was from eastern Europe, Romania maybe, and even the agency couldn't find her again. So she's like a ghost. The picture certainly has a ghostly feeling." For some reason, we find this really disturbing. And sad. What happened to this girl? [Guardian]
• Carlos Falchi sure seems like an upright guy. Reports the Times: "Once he said to a girl, 'That's my bag.' She didn't care for the remark, but then it sank in that this pot-bellied, gray-haired guy with silver bracelets was really him, the designer Carlos Falchi. Maybe in an age of brands and manufactured nostalgia she didn't even think he was real. She called her mother, who bought the bag 30 years before, and put Mr. Falchi on the phone and then closed the celebrity moment with a photo." Falchi's Target line debuts on November 1. [NYTimes]
• Duckie Brown co-designer Steven Cox got to thinking about men's and women's fashion after Miuccia Prada said recently that men's wear should be more influenced by women's wear. "Originally we had this whole conversation about using women's fabric. I don't really agree with that," said Cox, of the Duckie Brown collection. "Because what makes a fabric women's? You know, there is no penis or vagina in a fabric. Like, why is chiffon women's and why is it not men's? I don't know." [The Cut]
• Saks, eyeing the success of sample sale e-tailers like Gilt, is looking to replicate their tactics, and host its own online sample sales. [WSJ]
• Avon earned $156.2 million in the third quarter. Last year, during the same period, the company made $222.6 million. [Crains]

• In an interview with The Insider that airs tomorrow, Hailey Glassman says her boyfriend Jon Gosselin will "take his anger out on me... He has 'mantrums.' I shouldn't have to put up with being emotionally abused."

• "...I cry and say, 'Why are you so mean to me?'" Hailey says people have been criticizing her since she started dating Jon and "I get threats everyday. I get called a home wrecker and a fat whore. People will stare or point. It gets worse everyday." Yet, she still doesn't want to leave him. "I don't want to leave him all alone," she says. "At the end of the day, I love him but I dislike him at times. When I love someone I would never hurt them." There's a tear-filled preview here. [People, The Insider]
• Jon Gosselin's former nanny/lover Stephanie Santoro says she saw Jon smoking pot when the kids were in the house. "He said they were in bed and that he was out back smoking when we got there," says Santoro. "It was just Jon there that night with the kids…[Jon said], ‘That wore off quick – but it was just seeds…My good stuff is in New York." [Perez Hilton]
• On The Ellen DeGeneres Show Ellen asked Kate Gosselin about dating again and she said, "I'm not thinking about it, but the thought has crossed my mind at some point [that] it's going to be scrutinized... Let's not talk about it." [People]
• Jon Gosselin's rep denied In Touch's claim that a Jon Gosselin-Nadya Suleman reality show is in the works, but a rep for the reality show insists, "We've been developing this show for months." He says Jon is only denying it because, "After someone brings it to the media, it just freaks people out, but we're not BS-ing. This is going to end up on a network. We're talking to all four of them...Fox, ABC, NBC and CBS." The source says the show would start off as a one-time special and "We're even talking about scheduling it around the Superbowl. We think it could be that big. We think it could be American Idol-type" big. [E!]
• Katie Couric is dressing as Aaden Gosselin for Halloween. "I met Kate and she seems very nice," Couric said, "and I told her I was gonna be Aaden, and she said, 'You have to make sure you wear the glasses at the end of your nose.'" [Extra]
• Jessica Simpson just can't catch a break. Now PETA is giving her "whale-sized grrrs" for performing at Sea World. [U.S. News]
• Ed Meyer, who is producing a mockumentary called How I Married Jennifer Lopez: The J-lo and and Ojani Noa Story, says he intends to sell home videofootage of Jennifer Lopez and Ojani Noa. [The Wrap]
• The LAPD has handed over the "Hollywood Hills Burglar Bunch" case to the District Attorney, who said he'd file charges against Courtney Ames, Nick Prugo, Diana Tamayo, Roy Lopez Jr. and Alexis Taylor later today. [TMZ]
• Add Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green to the list of celebrities robbed by the "Burglar Bunch." Green's gun and some of Fox's t-shirts were stolen from his home recently, but he didn't realize there had been a break in because he was out of town shooting a movie. [TMZ]
• This Is It has already earned $2.2 million from late-night screenings, which distributor Sony calls "unprecedented" for a Tuesday in October. [AP]
• According to Dr. Arnold Klein's medical records he injected Michael Jackson with an intra-muscular drug labeled "I.M. Injection" 51 times in three months. An L.A. dermatologist says "I.M. Injection" is commonly used as billing code for Demerol. [TMZ]
• A medical board investigator testified today that Dr. Sandeep Kapoor kept a stash of Anna Nicole Smith's medical records hidden in his kitchen and on the floor of a closet at his home. The files had notes like, "opioid dependence on methadone" and "benzo addicted? To avoid" that were not included in her official medical records at his office. [AP]
• The People cover featuring Nicole Richie and her new baby was one of the mag's worst-selling issues. Just over a million magazines were sold, compared to People's usual average of 1.4 million a week. She was reportedly paid in the "mid-six figures" for the photos. [N.Y. Post]
• Bob Barker donated $1 million to Drury University to establish a professorship on animal rights that he hopes will lead to a full undergraduate degree program. [AP]
• Check out Adam Lambert's new album cover here: [Buzzfeed]
• Lisa Kudrow will guest star on Cougar Town as a "mean" dermatologist who treats Courteney Cox's character. [N.Y. Post]
• Kanye West and animator/cartoonist Bill Plympton are releasing a book called Through the Wire: The Words and Lyrics of Kanye West next month, which includes illustrated versions of 14 of Kanye's lyrics along with commentary "that gives insight into the man that we know." [Publishers Weekly]
• Jim Weatherly, the man who wrote "Midnight Train to Georgia," sings the original version. [Extra]
• Abigail Breslin will star as Helen Keller in a Broadway revival of The Miracle Worker with Alison Pill playing Annie Sullivan beginning in February. [N.Y.T.]
• Hayden Christensen and his brother Tove have filed a lawsuit against producer Philippe Martinez, who claimed to have secured $250 million for the production and distribution of independent films. They had entered into an agreement with Martinez to give him first-look rights to film projects from Hayden's Forrest Park Pictures. [The Wrap]
• Stephanie Pratt was formally charged with suspicion of DUI today. She was arrested two weeks ago after two breathalyzer tests registered .08 and .09. If convicted she could face up to six months in jail and a $1,000 fine. [TMZ]
• According to The National Enquirer, Josh Duhamel has been cheating on Fergie. He's having an affair with a "buxom, blonde stripper" named Nicole Forrester who claims their fling started when Josh introduced himself as "JD" and said he was in town making a porno movie. [National Enquirer]
• When asked if she and Taylor Lautner are dating, Taylor Swift said, "I don't know, he's an amazing guy and we're really close … and ah … yep... We're in a movie together and I am really excited about seeing it." [People]
• Denise Jonas says her son Kevin Jonas is marrying "the right girl." She says she's very similar to his fiancée Danielle Deleasa and she teases Kevin, "You're marrying your mother – but she is just thinner and prettier." [People]
• The recession is hitting everyone hard. 50 Cent says, "I buy diamonds on a very regular basis, but now I am selling my old stuff before I get something new. These are times when you learn about the value of money." [The Telegraph]

• The Kardashian sisters are going to put on their thinking kaps and hopefully kome up with a kollection for Bebe. [Kim Kardashian]
• Which makes about as much sense as Jermaine Jackson's rumored clothing line. [Times Of India]

• Megan Fox has been gunning for her just-announced Armani campaign, for which she was paid a rumored $2 million, for years — or approximately as long as she's been famous. She has worn Armani to events and finally met the designer at his couture show this summer. [AP]
• After missing the opportunity to release a Sarah Jessica Parker scent to coincide with the Sex And The City movie, Coty, the clever clogs company behing the actress' perfume deal, vowed to be prepared next time around. And lo, SJP NYC, a cute little pink thing in a beveled bottle, will launch next May, just in time for Sex And The City 2: Electric Boogaloo. [WWD]
• Fergie of the Black Eyed Peas has signed a perfume deal with Avon, the preferred perfume partner of Reese Witherspoon, Courteney Cox, and Patrick Dempsey. [WWD]
• See how Selena Gomez's new clothing line, Dream Out Loud, stacks up against the luminaries of tween clothing collections past: the Olsen twins' Wal-Mart line, Miley Cyrus and Max Azria's concatenation of sequins, and the criminally God-awful Stuff By Hilary Duff. [Refinery29]
• Yeohlee Teng has been honored by the Smithsonian Cooper-Hewitt National Design Museum. She says, "Fashion is so often about the Eighties, about the Seventies, but not about original thinking." Teng's preferred design philosophy? "Construct a cube, then put it on the body and watch the body activate it." Check out her current show at the Crow Collection of Asian Art in downtown Dallas. [DN]
• In some kind of grand, music-fashion-industry circle jerk, Michael Stipe will give an award to Renzo Rosso, Jon Bon Jovi will present something to Kenneth Cole, Oscar de la Renta will receive a prize from Grace Coddington, and Dita Von Teese will bestow something on Stephen Jones. In fashion, everyone's a winner. [WWD]
• Coach creative director Reed Krakoff is not only getting an eponymous fashion line, but a New York Fashion Week debut. Expect to see Krakoff on the schedule for February. [FWD]
• When I, like the Italian luxury — luxury as in $30,000 suits — label Brioni, turn 65, remind me to celebrate by releasing a limited-edition perfume and selling each of my 7,000 bottles for $399 (100 ml) r $830 (300 ml). Then, inexplicably, I'll invite Bryan Ferry to the launch. [WWD]
• Nitrolicious was given a free pair of Steve Madden's "Seryna" booties — the alleged knock-off Alexander McQueen is suing Steve Madden over — and posted an understandably glowing review, with photos. But with praise like, "These are really a good copy of the original boots but cost a fraction of the price," not to mention the fact that posts like these serve as timestamped evidence that Steve Madden is continuing to promote the product, could the company only end up developing Alexander McQueen's case? [Nitrolicious]
• We know Vera Wang won't be on the next season of Dancing With The Stars, but is it because the producers wouldn't let her design her own costumes? [FWD]
• Wang's president of creative direction, Constance Darrow, announced her resignation from the company yesterday. The designer is understood to have offered Darrow a promotion to stay. The senior vice president of worldwide marketing and communications, Elizabeth Musmanno, left Vera Wang last week. These developments could be related either to Wang's rumored reality television show, or to the arrival of new company president Mario Grauso, who starts work today. [WWD]
• Thus says model Liya Kebede: "Mothers are the world's best stimulus package because they invest in their families and their communities. When a mother dies, her children are up to 10 times more likely to die within two years. They are less likely to be immunized, more likely to be malnourished, more likely to contract HIV, and more likely to be exploited. When a mother lives, her children are fed, attend school, and know that someone exists who will do absolutely anything to make their lives better." [TDB]
• The American launch of A*Muse, Richie Rich and Pamela Anderson's eco-friendly swimwear line, sounds much like the international launch, at New Zealand Fashion Week in September. Even down to Richie's rollerskates. (I'm beginning to feel bad for the models who have to wear the samples, no doubt well-rubbed with body makeup and other people's sweat, by now.) [People]
• Ruffian's new collection for Anthropologie, Mise en Scene, is out. It's less whimsical than the retailer's typical fare, though the connection to vintage fashion is still obvious. [WWD]

• Avril Lavigne has officially filed for divorce from Sum 41's Deryck Whibley.

They were married 3 years and 1 month, and Avril cites "irreconcilable differences." She also doesn't want to have to pay him any money. If he does want spousal support, she'll be forced to ask, "Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?" [TMZ]

• Interesting: The guy arrested for allegedly burglarizing Lindsay Lohan's house, Nick Prugo, is friends with Teen Dream Drake Bell. [TMZ]
• Jon Gosselin would like for you to know that he will "continue on television" and that he's "not worried about future employment." Great. [NY Daily News]
• Alex Rodriguez flew from New York to Miami for one night to "wine and dine" Kate Hudson, who was in South Beach. Romantic! Oh but A-Rod's ex-wife, Cynthia, and their two daughters live in Miami, and Alex also wanted to see his kids. Romantic? [Page Six]
• "Leona Lewis hit in the face by maniac who then screamed ‘I love you.'" Don't get it. [Mirror]
• Apparently the guy was at the bookstore event where Leona Lewis was signing autographs for 90 minutes. A witness says the man walked up with the book, she signed it, and as she looked up he punched her. People could hear the impact. Then security jumped on the man — who was laughing — and Leona was hustled out with her hand over her eye. Leona says she is "ok." [BBC News]
• Taylor Swift will host Saturday Night Live next month. Will there be a Kanye West sketch? Taylor says: "I've been thinking about skit ideas for a long time. There are definitely some hilarious things that have happened to me over the past couple of months that I think will be pretty substantial skits." The problem is that SNL needs more black people. Keenan would not make a good Kanye. Or Beyoncé, frankly. [AP]
• Love love love this 10 Questions With Tracy Morgan column. When asked, "What are the cast members for 30 Rock like to work with? Tracy answers: "I don't know what they do when they're at home. Tina - she's a mother and a wife. We don't hang out. But at 30 Rock, everybody pretty much gets along. Jack McBrayer, we're very close, and it was an honor to be nominated [for an Emmy] in the same category with him. If he would've won, that means we would've won. If I would've won, that means I would've won. I'm not sharing my award with nobody." Also, his healthcare advice is interesting. [Time]
• Kanye West is "thankful" that a law was named after his mother. The measure will protect people from "unnecessary bodily trauma" that could result from elective cosmetic surgery procedures, if they are not physically fit to undergo surgery. [Radar Online]
• As you may recall, Fox NFL Sunday showed a skit mocking Jessica Simpson's weight. Now Fox says: "Burger King Corp. did not have any editorial input in the creation of the animation that ran last Sunday, and no one from Burger King Corp. approved it before it aired. Upon reflection, our poor attempt at humor was insensitive and we deeply apologize to anyone who might have been offended." [Us Magazine]
• The shitty sound of this dumb video of John Mayer partying in a gay bar nearly blew out my speakers, so beware. [ Radar Online]
• "Howard K. Stern helped Anna Nicole Smith crush, cook, inject Valium, ex-bodyguard testifies." [NY Daily News]
• Maria Shriver has issued an apology for illegally using her cell phone while driving and will donate her favorite old cell phone to the HopeLine program that helps domestic violence shelters. [TMZ]
• Will the editors really choose to put Tara Reid on the December cover of Playboy instead of Kelly Bensimon? [Fox News Pop Tarts]
• Michael Jackson's This Is It is selling out all over the world. [NY Daily News]
• Ew, Mariah Carey calls Nick Cannon "DJ Sex Fingers." As the kids say: Vom. [Page Six]
• "Spike Jonze had ex-girlfriend Karen O of Yeah Yeah Yeahs record Where the Wild Things Are music." She says: "It's the best way to continue the relationship in a professional way." [Gatecrasher]
• Is Kids Incorporated to blame for Fergie's meth habit? She says: "What happens when you're a child professional is that you have to be, well, professional. You're taught not to have tantrums, to always people-please. That's part of how I got into (drugs) later." Hmm. [NY Post]
• So you know how Jimmy Kimmel's girlfriend Molly McNearney works for his show? "Staff members are said to troubled by the romance and the unfair promotions it's earned McNearney." [MSNBC via Radar and Gawker]
• In the David Letterman case, the prosecutor wants to keep search warrants sealed and for a hearing to take place behind closed doors. [E!, AP]
• It's CBS vs. CBS in the David Letterman investigation. [NY Post]
• "Stephen Gately smoked cannabis on the night of his death." [Telegraph]
• Jodie Foster, Mel Gibson and Mel Gibson's beaver were hanging out in a high school in White Plains. [Page Six]
• Jeremy London (Mallrats, Party Of Five) may default on his mortgage unless he pays $12,856.81. [TMZ]
• Andrew Keegan was accused of abusing a former girlfriend, but a judge rejected the woman's request for a restraining order after hearing evidence. [TMZ]
• The Beckhams were named "best modern family" in a random online poll. [Mirror]
• "And I think for Letterman to get up there and say ‘I'm the innocent victim and I had some consensual sex'-and he actually said some interesting things: He used the word ‘creepy'-well, the last time I tried it, consensual sex wasn't creepy." — defense attorney Gerald Shargel, who has represented John Gotti. [The Daily Beast]
• "If I see Brody Jenner, he is dead… [He] has the smallest penis I have ever seen." — Always classy Joe Francis, who apparently has experience with seeing Brody naked? [Page Six]
• "I'm afraid it's because they are good. When [co-star and ex-wife] Connie and I wrote them we took about six weeks to write each episode, which is unheard of. People who care a lot spend 10 days, most people do it in a week. But the fact is, we used to write 135 to 140 pages (per episode) ... There was so much in the shows that people could watch them a lot of times because they would forget the things that are in them ... And secondly, in the character Basil we nailed a certain kind of English lower-middle-class type who people are aware of and who, I think, does exist in quite a lot of people." — John Cleese, on Fawlty Towers. [Reuters]
• "Just as what you are feeling in your life affects your acting, what you act in definitely affects what you are feeling in your life. And whether you want it to or not, and even if you don't know it, it bleeds into your life. I made 'Heat' when I was 14 and played a girl who died. A year later, I got into a fight with my mother and cut myself. I had never done it before and I never did it after that, but I think having my wrists bloody in a movie definitely affected my psyche." — Natalie Portman, whose film New York, I Love You starts Friday. [LA Times]
• "People have told me, 'You could just go out there and play guitar and sing your songs like Paul McCartney,' but I'd be too bored. Most of the joy of the shows is the magic of creating them — theater. I'm a perfectionist. I like hard work. I like to sweat." — Madonna. [Page Six]
• "Listen, I would love to tell you that I was this wonderfully smart and full-of-integrity kinda guy. But at the same time, man, I wanted to get laid. That was a big part of it! This is why I wanted to be different and why I wanted to have power and fame and money: because I wanted to be attractive to the opposite sex. I'd be lying to you if I didn't say that was a big part of it." — Michael Bublé. [Telegraph]

• Lady Gaga, Gay Activist! She "was the highest-wattage celebrity to attend both the Human Rights Campaign dinner Saturday night and the National Equality March on Sunday." Reporter Dan Zak writes:

"Nearby rally-goers screeched her name. She had marched with the crowds from her hotel after shrugging off security concerns, and had just finished a short speech to an enraptured throng of tens of thousands on the West Lawn. Glittery signs reading 'Gay for Gaga' and 'Lady Gaga {heart} Equality, U Should 2' poked up from the rainbowed masses." "I will never turn my back on my friends," said Lady Gaga, before disappearing from the rally. "Today is not a one-off performance."She also said: "In the music industry there's still a tremendous amount of accommodation of homophobia," she said. "So I'm taking a stand… I'm not going to play one of my songs tonight because tonight is not about me. It's about you." She sang John Lennon's "Imagine," but changed some of the lyrics. [WaPo]

• Miley Cyrus and her sister Brandi ate $70 worth of meat and mac 'n cheese at the Outback Steakhouse in Burbank last week. Miley paid with a $100 bill… and kept the change. Her spokesperson explains: She didn't know she was supposed to tip unless she was eating inside." Pardon? When has that ever been the case? [Rush & Molloy]
• Christina Hendricks married Geoffrey Arend — he was hilarious in 500 Days Of Summer! — at Il Buco restaurant in New York on Sunday. Congrats! [People]
• Jon Gosselin says that he wasn't the only one who took cash out of the joint account; Jon filed papers claiming Kate withdrew over $60,000 from their joint account between July and September 2009. But a source says Kate's transactions were legal; Jon didn't have permission. [TMZ]
• Jon Gosselin believes that Kate has control of more than one million dollars and that if she doesn't have a job, it's not his fault. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Jon Gosselin will light a menorah this year, partly because of gf Hailey Glassman. "This is the first year I will celebrate Chanukah. Everyone in my life is Jewish now, my attorney. I love it. I'm now half Jewish and half Korean. The family values are great… They gave her a free tummy tuck, worth $20 grand." I'm sure I'm not alone here when I say: Oy. [Rush & Molloy]
• Dina Lohan says that Lindsay's brother Michael is on academic scholarship at Ithaca (college)… and "He's also is doing a movie!" This paper reacts with the headline, "Oh no! Not another one!" [The Sun]
• Katie Holmes wants to send Suri to Catholic School, and noted Scientologist Tom Cruise is okay with it. Suri is already enrolled in Catholic Charities Yawkey Centre For Early Education And Learning in Boston, where Tom is filming the movie Wichita. [Daily Mail]
• Angelina Jolie is in talks to replace Charlize Theron in the thriller The Tourist. [JustJared]
• Prince Harry and Chelsy Davy: So on. [People]
• Nick Cannon is married to Mariah Carey. He's also a stand-up comic, a rapper, an actor, a D.J., a screenwriter and a television host and the chairman Nickelodeon's TeenNick division. [NY Times]
• At the BET Hip-Hop awards on Saturday, T.I. won, though he is in prison; Jay-Z was honored as MVP of the year; the late DJ AM won "DJ of the Year." Kanye West did not attend. The show airs October 27. [AP]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Kourtney Kardashian is expecting a baby boy. [NY Daily News]
• Mad Men's John Slattery doesn't want a garbage trucks garage in his New York neighborhood. [AP]
• "Fergie is Condoleezza Rice - if Condi knew how to execute a booty shake…" claims this profile of the singer, in which she talks about ecstasy; crystal meth ("it ruins you"); dating Mexican gang members and being a child star. The reporter also writes: "There is some speculation that Fergie is older than she lets on (seems unlikely; she grew up on TV), as her unquestionably sexy features can look a touch - how can I put this? - ravaged." [Times Of London]
• Kelly Bensimon was doing man-on-the-street interviews for Gotham magazine yesterday… and her efforts were taped for Real Housewives. [NY Post]
• Debi Mazar helped Maksim Chmerkovskiy get over ex-fiancée Karina Smirnoff with home cooked meals. Heartache doesn't mean stomachache. [People]
• Remember when Michael Jackson played a character on The Simpsons? The folks of The Simpsons were freaked out by him. [NY Post]
• Speaking of Michael Jackson, a snippet of his song "This Is It" has hit the interwebs; listen at the link. [TMZ]
• By the by the illuminated white glove Michael Jackson wore on his 1984 Victory tour sold for almost $70, 000 at auction. [The Sun]
• Katherine Jackson will not inherit 40% of her son's estate. [Carey Hart are HOT in this photo shoot for his tattoo shop's clothing line. [Daily Mail]
• Amy Winehouse "looked frail and unsteady" singing backup for her goddaughter on the TV show Strictly Come Dancing. [Mirror]
• Couples Retreat raked in $35 million at the box office; this column suggests the film "offers a lesson in moviegoing: add one beautiful location to a comedy that is not very funny, add to it actors who aren't really very famous, and you can make a movie that opens to reviews that aren't very good, yet still make cash hand over fist." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Saturday Night Live's Bill Hader has a new baby and says of fatherhood: "I think it's going to be awesome." [Celebrity Baby Scoop]
• In a poll of 100 New Yorkers, 26 women and 27 men think David Letterman is a "hypocrite for making jokes about the affairs of Bill Clinton and other politicians." 22 women and 31 men have worked at a place where the boss was having an affair with an underling. [NY Mag]
• Singer Stephen Gately, of Irish group Boyzone died Saturday while vacationing on the Spanish island of Majorca. [CNN]
• Stephen Gately may have chocked on his own vomit after a "drinking session." [Daily Mail]
• "Matt Lucas will not return to his stage role following the death of his ex-partner, it has been announced." [The Star]
• Mickey Rourke talks about using the word "faggot." Sorta. [TMZ]
• Dannii Minogue was judging X Factor when this guy Danyl Johnson sang "And I'm Telling You" from Dreamgirls. Danni insinuated that he was gay by telling him he didn't need to change the gender references in the song. Simon Cowell was pissed about that. [Daily Mail]
• Arnold Schwarzenegger is on Twitter now, posting pictures of the happy face in his morning oatmeal and so on. [NY Post]
• Sigourney Weaver is trying to promote a Gorilla Rehabilitation and Conservation Education, (GRACE) in the Congo, which will rescue and rehabilitate orphaned gorillas, saying: "These little gorillas just steal your heart. They're very sensitive creatures. So it's no surprise that this is a very demanding and ambitious project, the GRACE Center, but we need it. We have to have it." [AP]
• "Pierce Brosnan almost turned down the chance to star in his upcoming flick, The Greatest, about two parents struggling to move on after their son dies in a car accident — because his own son Sean survived a similar crash in 2000. "When I first got the script, I looked it over and put it under my bed for a week," he says. "I eventually decided to do it because I liked it, but it was hard to go to those deeper places in my heart." [Gatecrasher]
• Director Mike Nichols has been selected to receive the American Film Institute's 38th AFI Life Achievement Award. Nichols won an Oscar for directing The Graduate; was nominated for a best picture award as a producer for The Remains of the Day and his credits include Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, Catch-22, Carnal Knowledge, Silkwood, Working Girl, Primary Colors, Angels in America, Closer and Charlie Wilson's War. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Horn Lake, Mississippi's Circle G Ranch — also known as the Elvis Ranch, is up for sale, if you have $6.5 million. [UPI]
• High-brow PBS soap opera Upstairs Downstairs is being remade. [NY Post]
• Blind item! "What Oscar-winning actress and her Oscar-winning husband are said to be close to splitting? She's telling friends, 'We've grown apart.'" [Rush & Molloy]
• "I get why chicks dig him. He's extremely kind, incredibly intelligent, thoughtful, creative and respectful. I don't discuss my love life because it's always misinterpreted or put under the microscope. It's especially annoying when you're dating someone else who's well-known, which is why I normally would never go out with a famous guy. Let's put it this way… I'd be flattered if someone hit on me tonight, but I really can't say if I'm available or not." — Emmy Rossum on Adam Duritz. She also says: "I used to be an artsy, quiet, kind of chubby kid — which no one believes. But now I'm really comfortable with my body and my sexuality. I can be naked with the lights on." [People]00
• "My hair has never been that great. I had a Jheri curl at one point in my life. I had to go to rehab and confess, 'I'm Chris, I have a curl.' But, I don't think men are into their hair that much. Guys are concentrating on other things. When I was younger, I had a complex, and probably still do, about just not being buff and big. I think that's what guys are into. There are some right here in Hollywood, men on television right now, with fake pecs and stuff." — Chris Rock made Good Hair, but he doesn't think about his own that much. [Parade]
• "I think if she were playing something that was going to be really hard for her psychologically or damaging, I'd be more concerned, but she had a really good time with the sex thing, She plays a woman who, as far as I can tell, is really in charge of her life and is not a victim. So it sounded to me like it would be a blast. I've already seen little bits and pieces of some of the nudity and she looks beautiful. If you have it, why not?" — Susan Sarandon, on her daughter playing a student by day and a stripper by night in Californication. [Gatecrasher]
• "I've been corresponding with Anya Camilleri [the director] and we've been looking at historical paintings where the concept 'cougar' was depicted to try and see where it came from. I think 'cougar' is a way to make it appear as women are looking at their men as prey, and gaining something from it. Like when men are enhancing their own virility by going out with younger women. Why is there not a term for older men with younger women? I don't think Mrs. Robinson was a cougar — I think she was a woman having a breakdown, and it was played wonderfully." — Sharon Stone, who will play a woman who hires a much-younger gigolo in upcoming flick Satisfaction. [Gatecrasher]
• "I had dairy a few weeks ago by accident and I knew because the next day I was all phlegmy. And I was farting and it was gross. And then I knew. It was dairy. Plus it makes you fat. Instantly. [There] was a time in my life where I was not interested in health at all; health was a dirty word. And when I look at pictures now, I see that I looked tired and puffy and stressed." — Alicia Silverstone, whom this paper calls "the most non-annoying vegan on the planet." [NY Post]
• "I guess everyone has their wild side, and mine was halfway between being really shy and kind of a goofy spazoid. I never bit anyone, like Max, but I slapped a lot of butts. I don't know if you've seen kids do that-butt-slapping. Like, slapping the butts of my grandparents and babysitters. When I wasn't shy, I overcompensated." — Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, who did the soundtrack for Where the Wild Things Are. [NY Mag]
• "In an interview, Lars said he thought he reminded me of my father… and now, of course, I could make that link. He's very sincere with his questions and fears. He's a real artist in that way. He never censors himself... It was a weird relationship. The moments when it was just the two of us were pretty awkward… [Still] I had the feeling that he was inside me. He understood every blink, every detail. I felt as if I were portraying him, even though we were dealing with female sexuality. The anxiety and fear in my character was pretty much him." — Charlotte Gainsbourg, on Antichrist director Lars von Trier, whom this article notes has been called "Misanthrope. Misogynist. Pornographer. Xenophobe. Enfant terrible. Child." [BlackBook]
• "President Obama seems very authentic… I wonder if there's a white man inside of him." — Lars von Trier. [BlackBook]

[Melbourne, October 9. Image via Getty.]