"The license plate on this Morris MIni may say '70, but we're living like it's the late '60s! Jack Kerouac's not dead yet! He'd love my $498 chain-strap bag!"

"No, really. We're doing this. We don't trust anyone over 30. Get out of the way, narc."

"My life line is longer than this romper."

"Remember the time we tripped on acid and hung out in a graveyard? Oh. Hmm. You're right. I saw that in Easy Rider. It looked like fun. Anyway, yeah. My outfit. The tee is $118; the jeans are $248; one necklace is $148; a bracelet is $138 and the belt is $68. Authentic, huh? Looking like a hippie takes a lot of bread."

Click "full size" to enlarge.

"Which way to the love-in? I brought extra skirts."

"Do you like my $148 bullet bracelet? It's like, a statement. About war. Which is heavy. As in not cool. But bullets are."

"Am I the first one at the sit-in, or did I get the date wrong?"

"All we are saying… Is give flea-market chic a chance."

"Sure, my romper is $180, and makes me look pre-pubescent, especially when worn with lacy ankle socks, but it's a free country, man. And this is Free People. So cut me some slack, Jack. I'm just trying to hang loose."

WE INTERRUPT THIS CATALOG TO DRAW ATTENTION TO THESE $78 SHORTS. DO NOT ADJUST YOUR COMPUTER. THEY ARE COTTON AND FRAYED AND $78. YOU MAY NOW RETURN TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED BROWSING.

This is gorgeous. No snark. A pretty shot. A pretty top. A pretty girl. Fire Fly top, $88; Hammered Gold Earring, $158; Mising Piece Heart Necklace, $358. Golden California sunlight: Priceless. New York is cold. Brr.

"Remember that Aerosmith video with Liv and Alicia? We should reenact it!"
"When was this?"
"In like, 1994."
"First of all, I was 3. Second of all, this is supposed to be 1969."
"Hmm. So… no stripping and running into a lake then?"
"No."

"I got my first real six-string… Bought it at the five-and-dime… Played 'til my fingers bled… Was the summer of '69… Oh, wait. That's from the '80s, isn't it? Am I at the wrong photo shoot?"

"Someone told us this is how people dress in The Haight. My sweater is $168; her onesie is $315. Aren't we groovy?"

Click "full size" to enlarge.

Free People [Official Site]

Earlier: Anthropologie's Hazy Shade Of Winter
Fetchdog, Drs Fosters & Smith: Howliday Humiliation For Dogs & Cats
Dear Santa: Have You Seen The December J. Crew?
Barneys: Wooing With Witticisms & Wallet-Emptying Wares
Ashro: Stop Being Such A Slob And Get Yourself A Suit, Hat & Wig
19 Crappy & Crazy Christmas Gifts From Sky Mall
Silver Belles & Butt Floss: Christmas At Frederick's Of Hollywood
Preclears On Your List? Shop The Scientology Holiday Catalog

Related: Free People Wishes You Hippie Holidays
Free People: Winning Us Over With Cute, Cuddly Critters
Free People's Tops Can Be Worn Many Ways, Several Of Them Stoopid
At Free People, Spring Has Sprung, And It's Hideous
Free People: More Overpriced Thrift Store Crap Masquerading As Vintage Chic
'Free People', August 2007: Luxuriating Lolitas and $400 Shoes
Free People: Hideous Iron-Curtain Nostalgia Will Set You Back A Few Rubles
Free People: Someone Watched The Darjeeling Limited Before Booking This Photo Shoot

Also: All previous catalog posts

[New York, December 7. Image via Getty]

NEW YORK - DECEMBER 07: A model walks the runway at the Oscar De La Renta pre-fall 2010 show at 583 Park Avenue on December 7, 2009 in New York City. (Photo by Jemal Countess/Getty Images)

Onee-kei is about looking pulled together - cute, but still practical - and features combinations of clothes to wear to the office or after hours. S Cawaii, Vivi, JJ, Classy, and Glamorous are Japanese magazines that reflect the current trends. Other titles, like Kera or Pretty Style reflect different versions of the same thing. As with most fashion magazines, however, all the titles adjust depending on the dominant trends.


These magazines have one major difference from their American and British counterparts - though Elle, Vogue Nippon, and the other usual suspects all have Japanese versions of their magazine - these glossies are really just look books... page after page of how to put together stylish outfits, a little advice on hair and makeup, and some small sections (food and lifestyle) near the very end. As you can see, many of the pages revolve around a theme, and different ways to play to a trend.


(They also feature handheld gaming systems as a fashion accessories. And run ads with women playing games. I love this.)


Clothes geared toward the office are more functional, but planning a striking outfit for going out is apparently the fashion equivalent to preparing for war. (I'm also wondering what's beneath the orange jacket - perhaps the tiniest LBD on the planet?)


The day wear and casual items are often basic - simple tops, jeans, shoes, many of which readers can obtain state-side. But it's the pairings (and attitude of the models) that keeps it fascinating.


Models are rarely seen jumping, and are often posed in sexy or goofy positions, in a variety of locations around town. This shot leans artistic - however, S Cawaii is also known for having its models give sexyface on one page and then stick out their tongues in a teasing gesture in the next.


Looking through the merchandise can get frustrating. I would love to rock that Sesame Street cardigan.


Domani magazine is on the edge of onee-kei style - it typically features professional career women of means (ads for high end brands are dominant), and women who are in their 20s, 30, and 40s. Despite being out of the general age range for onee-kei (which generally stops in the mid-twenties), the glossy still has the same visual aesthetic, just more work (and luxury) focused.


Domani demonstrates how a look can go from casual to pulled together with simple accessories, or perhaps a change of shoe. This is helpful to those of us inclined to be non creative with our daily wardrobes. Especially, if you're like me and unemployment/working from home/working in a casual environment means you tend to forget how to dress when you need to go somewhere.


The look books often take a trend - like the no collar jacket, and provide ideas on multiple ways to incorporate the style.


Accessories are often given full focus, like the studded leggings that make a plain dark gray top and denim shorts more visually stimulating.


The moderate but unusual pairings are a good reminder to try being less conservative with both clothes and accessories: A leopard print shoe would work with a variety of looks.


Another reason to love J-fashion mags? The freebies, which are often bundled into the magazine. (I am currently wearing the star socks shown.) Over the years S Cawaii has also gifted me a tote bag which says "I heart Moussy" and a small red pouch with black skulls on it that I use as a makeup bag.


"Thou shalt be fly" is the onee-kei philosophy when it comes to fingernails - they are often an artistic extension of your outfit. Interested in recreating these in the U.S.? It will be tough, I warn you. But if you really like these nail designs, the best way to get them (and keep costs down, lest you find yourself with a $100 manicure) follow on the next slide.


(1) Embrace the two finger design. Pick whichever art you like the most and ask for that on two fingers, with a more basic complementing design. (2) Bring a picture and look for a nail tech who is interested in learning the design. (I sometimes sweeten the deal by offering to let them see all the designs in the book. Scanning color copies also works.) (3) Have your own tools on hand - most places do not stock much beyond colors and rhinestones. Nail accessories can be found in specialty stores, online, and in craft stores (some of the designs you see on nails are actually stencils or small charms. (4) Tip well.


With a little patience and skill, some designs are achievable at home, with some effort.


While some magazines prefer to dazzle with designers, S Cawaii lets you know there is no shame in going faux. They even announce the "fake wool coat" the model is wearing.


Sure, these glossies focus a lot on attainable fashion, but they occasionally build in fantastic images. The nod to Alice in Wonderland is fabulous, yet the elements of the outfit are surprisingly wearable.


This isn't my style at all, but it's cute.


Unfortunately, as time goes on, the onee-kei magazines are absorbing more and more American style. Paris Hilton, Nicole Ritchie, Kate Moss, Lindsay Lohan and Lauren Conrad are taking up page space (in keeping with onee gal style, which places a heavy focus on celebrity) and twelve dollars is a lot to pay for fashion I see for free.

[Hula Valley, Israel; December 6. Image via Getty]

Israeli supermodel Bar Refaeli poses inside a vintage car during a photo session on December 6, 2009 for a new campaign for the Israeli fashion house Fox at the northern Israeli Hula Natural Reserve, remnant of a once larger lake and wetland and a bird reserve. AFP PHOTO / ANCHO GOSH (Photo credit should read ANCHO GOSH/AFP/Getty Images)

It's not terribly surprising to see, after Vogue Paris's noble flag-bearing effort to make blackface directional, the white model, black makeup look become a trend worth imitating. In this case, the online magazine Tangent chose to one-up Carine Roitfeld and Steven Klein by opting not just for a blackface fashion spread, but a blackface cover. The cover image has apparently leaked ahead of its publication date, because Tangent's website still features Issue 1's cover. But this picture was shot by the magazine and intended for use.

Does Harry Connick, Jr., need to come explain it to you again, Australia?

Meanwhile, there is a near-complete absence of any actual Asian people acting the Asian roles in Karl Lagerfeld's just-released movie, Paris-Shanghai. The film relates a journey Coco Chanel takes around China: visiting workers in the 1960s, dropping in on Marlene Dietrich in the 1940s, gambling with Wallis Simpson in the 1920s, being received by the Empress Dowager and her adopted son, presumably sometime before 1898, when she put him under house arrest. And then Coco wakes up and it was all a dream. Actually, it's worse than that, because you see her falling asleep on her office couch after the conclusion of the interminable opening scene, so you know even going into it that it's going to be one of those just-a-dream endings. There, I just saved you 23 minutes.

The plotting is trite, the acting atrocious — Edita Vilkeviciute, as young Coco Chanel, seemingly makes no attempt to hide her thick Lithuanian accent, and Heidi Mount, as Dietrich, gets peevish and sulks like a bored American teenager — and between the tedious pacing and Lagerfeld's failure to indicate what exactly is going on whenever something minorly climactic does occur, it's a hard film to get through. (Turns out Lagerfeld's genius reaches its limit where the task of making beautiful and effective moving images begins.)

What unfolds is a classic orientalist narrative that treats China as the interesting backdrop to an intrigue motivated by and created for white Europeans. No mention is made of the various upheavals that were actually going on in China during the early part of the 20th Century — like, uh, the end of the monarchy, the struggle for unification, and the Civil War — or of the 1960s, the period of the Cultural Revolution. In 1923, Sun Yat-Sen proclaimed the Three Principles of the People as the basis of the modern Chinese state, and Mikhail Borodin arranged the first Soviet arms deals with China — but the year is represented in the film by a craps table back-and-forth about palm reading between Chanel and Simpson. Lagerfeld told Women's Wear Daily his film "is about the idea of China, not the reality. It has the spirit of, and is inspired by, but is unrelated to China." Far easier indeed to investigate your own "idea" of a country than to contend with the reality of it as a place in itself.

But what is most worthy of note is Lagerfeld's consistent choice of European actors to play Chinese roles. This is obviously intentional. "It is an homage to Europeans trying to look Chinese," says Lagerfeld. "Like in The Good Earth, the people in the movie liked the idea that they had to look like Chinese. Or like actors in Madame Butterfly. People around the world like to dress up as different nationalities."

WWD calls it like it is: yellow face. The Empress Dowager is played by Lagerfeld's longtime muse, the Briton Amanda Harlech. Her son is played by Lagerfeld's latest boy-toy, Baptiste Giabiconi, an Italian. Giabiconi, in an earlier scene, plays a Chinese peasant alongside the Dane Freja Beha Erichsen. Erichsen then pops up in the gambling scene, as the "Chinese Courtesan":

There are a handful of Asian actors who warrant small roles. Tao Okamoto, a model who is, incidentally, Japanese, gets about two minutes of screen time as Anna May Wong, the actress who played opposite Dietrich in Shanghai Express. Some of the men in background scenes, and the train conductor, are Asian. But what the sight of Erichsen and Giabiconi in their various Chinese roles conjures most for me is this:

Image of Mr. Yunioshi via Hokubei

Will Tangent Be Left Red-Faced By 'Blackface' Cover? [Imelda]
Karl Lagerfeld Talks Shanghai And Fashion [WWD]
Chanel Paris-Shanghai Part I [YouTube]
Chanel Paris-Shanghai Part II [YouTube]
Chanel Paris-Shanghai Part III [YouTube]

[Shanghai, December 3. Image via Getty.]

A model displays an outfit by German-born fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld during the Chanel Paris Shanghai fashion show in Shanghai on December 3, 2009. The show featured Lagerfeld's new collection Paris-Shanghai under the Chanel brand. AFP PHOTO/PHILIPPE LOPEZ (Photo credit should read PHILIPPE LOPEZ/AFP/Getty Images)

Forgive me if I revert to a 16-year-old Valley Girl version of myself, but ohmigawd, grody. This is soap wrapped in felt. My bathroom pet peeve is hair on soap. SOAP, BY DEFINITION, SHOULD BE CLEAN. If there's pube hair on your Lever 2000, your shower is VOID. Ew ew ew.

The sweater seems nice and all, but my lust is reserved for that Clothbound Penguin Classic version of Sense and Sensibility. Actually, my favorite designs in the series are the chandelier-covered Great Expectations and the peacock-feathered Picture Of Dorian Gray. You have Coralie Bickford-Smith to thank for the exquisite patterns.

This "message in a bottle" thingy is $16 for a little glass jar and some blank paper. Blink. Blink.

Is the "in-the-clouds scarf" pretty, in a shabby chic/grandma's attic kind of way? Yes. Is it $168 pretty? No.

Someone's been in the Ugly Betty wardrobe department.

My problem with Shabby Chic is my same problem with Olsen twins chic. It's not hip to be homeless, so why is it hip to LOOK homeless? Derelicte your own balls.

The "noble lore" blouse is probably cute and Blair Waldorf-esque, but the "hazy" photo treatment makes it hard to tell. It's worse than the time they shot shit underwater, because it makes me feel like I have glaucoma.

If I have one gift, it's the uncanny ability to look at a page of items and only like the most expensive thing pictured. In this case it's the "Enveloped Petals Cardigan," ringing up at $248 — the Upended Poppy tee is $68; the In-A-Moment dress is $118 and the Waltzing Daphne blouse is $98.

"He said he was a painter… He asked me if I wanted to get plastered… I didn't know it he painted walls… Still, he made me feel dizzy and weak in the knees! Or was it the fumes? All I know is I haven't spackled like that in a long time."

Excellent things about this shot:
1. Eyebrows
2. Eyes
3. Masculine/feminine combo of blazer and lace

Terrible things:
1. Blazer wouldn't look good on me/fit my rack
2. Doesn't come in my size anyway

AAAAAHHHH my eyes! Make it stop.

More lovely books. The striped "Saturation Point" heels are cute, too: $88.

She is humming "Smoke Gets In Your Eyes." Mark my words.

The "Great Heights Shift," $148: Cute or corny? As a city girl, I'm a sucker for a skyline.

Oh, Anthro. This always happens. I hate you, then you do something sweet — like pairing a girl "For Flora Skirt" ($168) and pindot tights ($18) with retro "Carved Celadon" heels ($168). Le sigh.

Anthropologie [Official Site]

Earlier: Man Shops Globe: The World Is Your Boho Bazaar
Man Shops Globe: The World Is Your Boho Bazaar
Anthropologie: Sartorialist-ic "Real" People Impossibly Pretty, Well-Dressed
May Anthropologie Catalog: Totally Watered Down
Anthropologie "Adorned": Critters & Kids Steal The Spotlight From Bags & Baubles
Anthropologie "Revival": TV-Ready Fall Fashion
Pottery Barn, Anthropologie & West Elm: Bedding Porn For Sleepyheads
CB2, Anthropologie & Delia's: More Bedding Porn For SleepyHeads
Please Do Not Look The Anthropologie Model In The Eye
Anthropologie "Vignettes": Forcing Us To Look Forward To Fall
Anthropologie "Giving": We Love To Hate & Hate To Love It
Urban Outfitters, Free People & Anthropologie: What's The Difference?
Anthropologie Doesn't Care About Black People

Related: Fetchdog, Drs Fosters & Smith: Howliday Humiliation For Dogs & Cats
Dear Santa: Have You Seen The December J. Crew?
Barneys: Wooing With Witticisms & Wallet-Emptying Wares
Ashro: Stop Being Such A Slob And Get Yourself A Suit, Hat & Wig
19 Crappy & Crazy Christmas Gifts From Sky Mall
Silver Belles & Butt Floss: Christmas At Frederick's Of Hollywood
Preclears On Your List? Shop The Scientology Holiday Catalog

All previous catalog posts

[Paris, November 1. Image via Getty]

Models display creations by designer Sonia Rykiel for H&M 2009-2010 ready-to-wear collection on December 01, 2009 at the Grand Palais in Paris. AFP PHOTO FRANCOIS GUILLOT (Photo credit should read FRANCOIS GUILLOT/AFP/Getty Images)

Caption: PARIS - DECEMBER 01: Models are seen during the rehersal of Sonia Rykiel and H&M underwear collection launch at Grand Palais on December 1, 2009 in Paris, France. (Photo by Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images)

If Jonathan Saunders's eight-benjamin tee (it has, like, colors) isn't quite twee enough for you, you can shell out just $70 for a wifebeater that says some bullshit about an "imposter chicken" who drives a bus. The same annoying hipster who enjoys this gift might like a class on pickling things in Brooklyn (can Vena Cava's designer Chuck Taylors be pickled? What about that wooden iPod dock by Vers?). Or perhaps a volunteer vacation — because nothing says "happy holidays" like forced WWOOFing. And for your "overstressed and undersexed" friend, why not a free checkup for adrenal fatigue — a vague and ill-defined condition best cured by the innovative treatment of getting enough sleep. Sadly not included in December Vogue is the much-needed pull-out greeting card: "Merry Christmas! I'm concerned about your glands!"

Santa, it's kind of cool to send models to Chile's Andes Mountains and all, but really, even though the girl in the coat looks adorbs as she "poses" or drunkenly weaves through the snow, the dude in the poncho and hat in the back looks more interesting. Bad-ass, even. Even the horse is like, "Bish plz. Nay."

Santa, don't you love this shot? The textures and colors! And if you, Mr. Claus, feel bringing this girl a pearl twisted hammock necklace ($98) and a pearl-and-crystal avalanche necklace (135), that would be awesome, because I'm loath to pay those prices for them. And I've been good.

Have you ever tried this, St. Nick? Going out it lots of cute layers instead of a coat? Does it work for you? Really? Are you warm enough? Can you still move your arms? Huh.

Aw, Santa, as a girl who dresses up for Dorothy almost every Halloween, my heart skips a beat when I see glitter heels. Then again, I dig pretty much everything glittery here — the tank, the cardigan, the necklace.

Yum! Ladylike coats in sugary-sweet colors!

Ooh, this hearkens back to boat on dry land trend of 2008! Unless that's a frozen lake.

(Click "full size" to enlarge)

Dear Santa, don't you think it would be nice to entertain at home in a velvet jacket and silk pajama pants? And, more importantly: Sneakers? Oh, it's all very well to squeeze into something short and/or tight, and strap on heels and teeter around at holiday parties. But imagine being able to eat! And walk!

Dear Kris Kringle: The "Ellington" skirt is named after Duke, right? It's all jazzy and whatnot, designed for dancing on top of a piano or for pretending you're in a repertory theater production of Chicago. Too bad it's styled with those hideous socks and shoes.

Riddle me this, KK: Is "bling" ever going away? Not sparkles — sparkly stuff we love. But the word. Bling. Just a question. While you're thinking about it, bring me this cardigan in light berry, fresh guava, soft violet and heather fossil.

Yo. Sinterklaas. File this under "good in theory but less elegant in practice."

Dear Santa: Bet you can't guess who the most awesome person in this picture is. Go ahead, click "full size" to enlarge. Nah, it's not the gray lady on the left in the Ellington skirt. Try again.

Ding ding ding!

Hey, Santa, did you know J. Crew hired Chanel Iman? Exciting, right? She looks super pretty! Young! Fresh! Bright-eyed and bushy pony-tailed! And, you know: Yay for black models.

Another yay! Is this Arlenis? Her skin is to die for, as are these soft, candy colors.

Oh, Santa. If only I looked like this right now. Put-together! Joyous! Like a flattering light and some peachy blush are emanating from within me! Instead I'm wearing pajamas with cupcakes and ice cream on 'em and my hair looks like a Brillo pad that needs to be thrown away and my face is like :-/

Dear Santa: Everything but the boots. And maybe you could throw in a little somethin' extry?

Thanks!

J. Crew [Official Site]

Earlier: October At J. Crew: Pretty, Preppy, Preposterous
J.Crew's Ovary-Busting Child Models Should Come With A Warning
Fall At J. Crew: Romantic Ruffles, Destroyed Jeans, Hideous Shoes

J. Jill Vs. J. Crew: It's A Fashion Showcase Showdown

Related: Barneys: Wooing With Witticisms & Wallet-Emptying Wares
Ashro: Stop Being Such A Slob And Get Yourself A Suit, Hat & Wig
19 Crappy & Crazy Christmas Gifts From Sky Mall
Dean & Deluca Thanksgiving: Mouth-Watering, Wallet-Emptying
All previous catalog posts

[Tokyo, November 25. Image via Getty]

A Model displays a weddingdress during a collection of British designer Vivienne Westwood at a boxing stadium in Tokyo on November 25, 2009. AFP PHOTO / Yoshikazu TSUNO (Photo credit should read YOSHIKAZU TSUNO/AFP/Getty Images)

For starters, those earrings on the cover are $19,600. They're not just earrings, see, they're 7.67 natural amoeba diamond slice earrings in 18K gold with colored diamonds. Plus, they possess the power to hypnotize!

This, friends, is a candle. A pretty candle, and yet: something you set fire to. $395. Are you feeling witty yet?

Rose gold chain with diamonds, $4900. Skinny jeans, $194. Hairdo that involves refereeing a cock fight: Priceless.

This Lacoste polo featuring a crocodile clusterfuck is a limited edition collaboration with Brazilian designers Humberto and Fernando Campanas and "reflects their commitment to creative chaos and triumphantly simple solutions." Witty! And $165.

"You can pretend to be serious; you cannot pretend to be witty." — Sascha Guitry

Honestly, I like the idea of peppering the catalog with witticisms, like this one, even though I had never heard of Sacha Guitry. I looked him up! He was a French actor, dramatist and director who wrote his first play at age 17. He wrote and directed and acted in Pasteur, a biography of the famous scientist; and there's something in his IMDb biography about how he lived a lavish lifestyle while the Germans occupied France in the '40s… He was jailed for a few months after the liberation of Paris. He was married five times, all to actresses who co-starred in either his plays or films. And! His name was apparently spelled Sacha, not Sascha.

But none of this is the point! The point is: That hair bauble, which would most certainly instantly fall out of my hair and through a sewer grate, is $1,990.

"Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you." — Carl Jung

"Show me someone willing to pay $2,900 for these earrings and I will show you someone rich and dumb." — Yours truly.

There's a Dorothy Parker quote on the lingerie page, where $125 gets you a strip of silk for romantic, light BDSM evenings.

Dammit, if I had $365 and poor eyesight, I would love a pair of Albert Maysles glasses. He directed Grey Gardens! He's avuncular! He rocks! And the Maysles Institute in Harlem is a nonprofit organization that provides training and apprenticeships to underprivileged individuals. And you can see movies there, too!

A "choosing between two evils" quote on page where both items are made of rabbit fur? Witty?

"If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?" —Abraham Lincoln.

New idea: LOLFoundingFathers.

Oh, hey, if this loose, body-disguising psuedo-homeless style looks familiar, it's because these garments are from The Row, aka Mary-Kate and Ashley's clothing line. $490 for the cardigan, $225 for the tank and $1,700 for the pants. That's $2,145 to look like you just rolled out of bed and threw on some laundry from your floordrobe.

Since alligators have been seen in the Mississippi River, a Mark Twain quote on this page is actually an inspired choice.

Barneys New York [Official Site]

Earlier: Ashro: Stop Being Such A Slob And Get Yourself A Suit, Hat & Wig
19 Crappy & Crazy Christmas Gifts From Sky Mall
Dean & Deluca Thanksgiving: Mouth-Watering, Wallet-Emptying
All previous catalog posts

The slight came after Rosie O'Donnell told the designer, "On behalf of every plus-sized woman in the world, I just want to thank you." And Fisher's distancing, Rosie said on her radio show, "was like someone stabbed me in the heart." What was so weird about the whole thing was, it made us all wonder, Who does Eileen Fisher think her demographic is? After all, if she didn't know its perception, they wouldn't be trying so hard to change it. I think of it as a brand my mom feels good in - reliable, well-made, maybe overpriced, but in quiet good taste and modeled by "real women" - albeit of the ethereal, Joan Baez school. And there's nothing wrong with that; it's great, in fact. And why would any designer deny it? I get wanting to expand appeal (although in this case it seems even more Sisyphean than Ann Taylor's makeover), but biting the well-kept hand that feeds you seems...imprudent. (Also: I don't remember ever seeing Rosie in Eileen Fisher. But then, I don't hang out with her regularly. Anyone?)

The mini-fracas prompted WWD to run a very interesting piece on exactly who designers think is wearing their clothes. Obviously a high-fashion line - hell, each individual collection - has a perspective and maybe even a muse in mind, but Eileen Fisher? Surely she designs with her actual customer in mind, right? Says Kathy Griffin,

I know women who buy Eileen Fisher, and the reason they buy Eileen Fisher is the same thing Rosie was talking about, which is, the women I know who buy Eileen Fisher, they want comfort, they're soccer moms, so Eileen Fisher can act like she's playing to the size 2 woman, but the truth is, I think what makes her brand successful is that there are a lot of women that love to go to that store and feel like they can get seven pieces that go together that they never have to worry about again.

Here were a few of the most interesting quotes from designers in the piece on their ideal customer...versus their reality.

Angela Missoni: "I tell our sales staff not to sell an outfit just for the sake of selling it if it doesn't look right. Knitwear is tricky and can make you look much bigger, so when I see a woman squeezed into one of my outfits, I'm not thrilled." So, what, they're supposed to wrest sweaters from the grasp of larger women?

Tory Burch:

We recently added a size 14, because I felt we were not meeting all the needs of our customer. I love to dress all types of women and certainly all ages, so, for me, that's part of the success of our brand. When I see someone who's a larger size wearing my clothes, I'm completely flattered that they're making her feel good. That's why I'm designing, to make women feel good about what they're wearing."

"Feeling good," apparently translates to "being able to fit into clothes." They ask so little!

Stella McCartney: "When you meet a larger lady and she says, ‘Oh, I love your stuff, but there's nothing for me' - it breaks my heart. I feel like I haven't done my job properly when women say that to me." Well, it's too bad she's not in a position to do anything about that!

Andrew Gn: "Not everybody is Kate Moss. Everyone has the right to look great. I'd love to dress Beth Ditto. When I see someone wearing my clothes, I am proud, often. Puzzled, sometimes. Horrified, never." Okay, for the last time,"Beth Ditto" isn't a "get out of jail free" card.

Who Wears the Clothes? Balancing Branding And Customer Reality [WWD]
Eileen Fisher's Shifting Silhouette [NYT]
Rosie: Eileen Fisher "Stabbed Me in the Heart" [NBC]

For one thing, putting a hastily-snapped, haphazardly lit runway shot on a major magazine cover (especially one that prides itself on premium photography) would test even the most transformative powers of Photoshop. And really, why bother? They actually shot Moore, the gallery of photos indicates the actress is indeed extremely slim and toned — even if not to the full extent of the post-production wizardry. And for everything else, of course, there's retouching.

Demi Moore's Body Replaced By W Magazine [Pop Culture Madness]

Earlier: The Curious Case of Demi Moore's Left Hip
Photographer Bets $5000 On Demi Moore W Cover

Details of Kim's death are still emerging. This morning, Paris Match wrote that sources inside the police investigation say the model left a suicide note. Fellow gossip title Le Parisien stated that "multiple sources" are saying that Kim's father, a Samsung executive, does not believe his daughter killed herself. Kim's mother flew to Paris on Friday, and her father arrived in the city today. An autopsy is to be performed tomorrow — standard police procedure for violent deaths — and the pathologist's findings may be known as soon as the end of this week.

Friends of the young model are also speaking to the press. Several people told the Telegraph that Kim, in the words of reporter Kim Willshire, "had become fed up with modeling and its demands, considering her life was too frenetic and incompatible with forming the sort of long-term relationship she hankered for." Another anonymous friend said Kim would sometimes dodge her agency's calls in order to carve out some time for herself. One of Kim's former agents said, "She was an excellent model, but she used to say she had hard times off the job."

But the richest source of information on Daul Kim remains her blog. The temptation of recent posts that referenced feeling "mad depressed and overworked," a poem that reads in part, "i just know / the more i gain / the more lonely it is," and, most of all, the fact that her last post was titled "say hi to forever," has apparently been too much for major news sources to resist. These mostly quote selectively, ignoring the fact that Kim said she felt depressed and overworked in Seoul and was happy to be leaving for Paris, that Kim titled virtually all of her posts with "say hi to..." and that the post in question was just a YouTube clip of one of her favorite house DJ's tracks, and that in her poem, the lines about feeling lonely were followed directly by lines about falling in love. "but when people grow together," wrote Kim, "its something that is not easy but is nice / and that is something."

It's probably a good thing Kim died in Paris, not in New York, or else we'd have to contend with Geraldo Rivera's opinions of her verse, and television cameras filming the removal of her body, as we were treated to last year, when 20-year-old Kazakh model Ruslana Korshunova jumped to her death in the financial district.

It's understandable that reporters would look to a blog for insight into its author's mind when the author is no longer available for questioning, but it should be done in such a way that the excerpts accurately reflect the whole. Kim often wrote about being busy, yes, and sometimes seemed lonely — but she also wrote about loving Milan Kundera, Klaus Kinski, and Boy George, joked about how she would make a good wife one day, and posted pictures of her paintings. (She had a solo show in Seoul in 2007.) In one of her earliest posts to I Like To Fork Myself, she wrote mock-seriously about ending her life, and then immediately followed up: "KIDDING. I'm fine. Just tired." The overwhelming impression given in her blog wasn't that of a depressive lost soul crying out for help in post after tragically ignored post: it was of a smart young woman with an interesting life, managing bewildering array of responsibilities with a wickedly dark sense of humor. And some issues with insomnia. Not everything in her life should now be re-evaluated in light of her death. To try and turn it all into a series of "signs" diminishes the person that she was.

While it's natural that her next of kin would want to put a stop to quoting out of context, Kim's words have already been featured in articles published from here to Australia. The "I know I'm like a ghost" quote, the "mad depressed and overworked" quote, they're out there. They will be repeated from article to article, from broadsheet to broadsheet to tabloid to tabloid, until all context is erased. Ending access to Kim's blog, while it may tamp down interest in the short term, in essence only serves to deny interested parties a chance to glimpse the wider context of Kim's life. Or at least to see her life as she wished it to be understood. While of course, in the case of a 20-year-old's death, there are no parties more "interested" than her actual family, blogging was evidently important to Kim — she found time to write sometimes several times daily, even as she traveled to three or four countries in a week — and in my opinion, it would be a shame if the record of her life Kim chose to publish were to go permanently dark after her death.

I Like To Fork Myself [Official Site]
Daul Kim: Model 'Had Become Fed Up With Work' [Telegraph]
Daul Kim, La Jolie Fleur S'est Fanée [Paris Match]
Daul Kim S'est-Elle Vraiment Suicidée? [20Minutes.fr]
Enquête Relancée Après Le Suicide Du Mannequin Daul Kim [Le Parisien]
I Know I'm Like A Ghost: A Cry For Help Before Dying [Sydney Morning Herald]

Earlier: 5 Fashion Model Blogs That Are Actually Interesting

Whatever you're planning to wear to your company Christmas party is nowhere near as good as this. A red suit is clearly what your life has been lacking. Don't like this one?

Try one like this instead.

Or this.

Or perhaps emerald green is more your thing.

It goes on like this for pages and pages and pages! After a while, you start wearing down — believing that, yes, what you need to be wearing is a fancy skirt suit and a hat.

An elegant black ensemble is probably what I'd choose. No word on whether it comes with Jeeves, to help you out of cars.

All-over floral worries me. And I am, admittedly, a magpie maximalist: I like sequins and flowers and rhinestones and doodads. But I fear that wearing something like this would make me look like the new Von Trapp nanny who's gotten into the curtains. Or wallpaper.

Statuesque posture, unshakable confidence: Required; not included.

Sometimes overtly "feminine" fashion — adorned with flower blooms or buds and other veiled vaginal references — can be delicate, demure… almost weak. This, for some reason, reads "strength." …And "vulva-esque."

Did I mention that Ashro has a wig section?

Man, I love that the wigs come in gray. That means that somewhere out there, some sassy grandma is wearing this sassy cut.

Asymmetrical even!

So, here's why I have the Ashro catalog: I once ordered a caftan. To blog from home in. Feels slightly more appropriate than pajamas when the UPS guy shows up.

I can't vouch for the "approrpriate-ness" of the other casual wear Ashro offers, however…

Ashro [Official Site]

Earlier: 19 Crappy & Crazy Christmas Gifts From Sky Mall
Dean & Deluca Thanksgiving: Mouth-Watering, Wallet-Emptying
All previous catalog posts

Last week, easyJet distanced itself from the photographs — which appeared in a recent issue of its inflight magazine in a package pegged to the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin wall — by recalling the issues and apologizing publicly. EasyJet implicitly blamed custom publisher Ink, which has contracts to produce inflight magazines for dozens of airlines, saying they were "not aware of the images until they appeared in print. As a consequence we are now reviewing our relationship with the publisher and are withdrawing this month's issue from all flights."

Now, Ink has broken its silence on the issue with a statement on its website that simultaneously apologizes but stops short of condemning the concept:

Ink Publishing sincerely apologises to anyone who may have been offended by the fashion shoot in the November issue of easyJet inflight, in which a model is photographed in front of Berlin's Holocaust Memorial. Far from trivializing the Memorial, on the contrary the intention was to encourage passengers to visit for themselves.

The aim of each monthly shoot is to highlight an easyJet destination and tell a relevant narrative. The shoot was intended to not only promote local design talent and the city itself, but to raise awareness. From an educational perspective, it is of the utmost importance that visitors to Berlin see the Jewish Museum (who gave us written permission to shoot in their grounds) and Holocaust Memorial first hand. We absolutely regret any offence caused.

Note the distinction between the Jewish Museum, where they apparently had permission to shoot, and the outdoor Fields of Stelae, which is operated by the Foundation Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe, where, according to the Foundation's director, they did not.

Ink Publishing Statement - EasyJet Berlin Fashion Shoot [Ink Publishing]
Related: easyJet Grounds In-Flight Magazine After Holocaust Gaffe [The New Statesman]

Earlier: Inflight Mag Apologetic Over Holocaust Memorial Fashion Shoot

The magazine didn't have permission to shoot at the Memorial, but apparently it wasn't hard to sneak by security. In its apology, first reported in Britain's The New Statesman, easyJet said,

"The magazine is produced by INK — an external publishing house, and easyJet were not aware of the images until they appeared in print. As a consequence we are now reviewing our relationship with the publisher and are withdrawing this month's issue from all flights."

"easyJet prides itself on bringing together a wide range of cultures and beliefs and is appalled by this insensitive and inconsiderate photo-shoot, the aim of which was to highlight some of Berlin's iconic landmarks and certainly no offence was meant."

No word on who the photographer and stylist on the shoot were. We called over to INK Publishing's Brooklyn offices asking for more info and were referred to their London headquarters. We'll update when we hear back.

easyJet Grounds In-Flight Magazine After Holocaust Gaffe [The New Statesman, via The Awl]

I felt bad for her, I really did. But the thrill is gone! You done me wrong, PR. And it's not me: It's you.

Anyway: Here's what happened last night. Carol Hannah cried. She was comforted by the Aryan arms of Logan.

Carol Hannah cried some more, and was comforted by Christopher.

Later Carol Hannah bucked up and put on some mascara.

Tim Gunn had a mothertrucking meltdown. Don't make Snagglepuss angry! Or he will exit! Stage left!

Here's Althea's show. She said that she was inspired by sci-fi movies of the '50s and '60s.

I thought her show was more '80s.

Or '90s.

Carol Hannah's show was basically just stuff she wanted to wear. Here are the notes I took last night:
yawn
baggy satin
preggo top
bottle brush dress
cleopatra sea anemone

Irina was inspired by New York, and the armor a woman needs to protect herself in this city. Although I found her distasteful as a "character" on the show, her collection had some really nice coats and was more cohesive than the other two. Still, was it as good as collections by Kenley, Leanimal or Christian Siriano?

In the end, judges Heidi Klum, Michael Kors, Nina Garcia and Suzy Menkes agreed that Carol Hannah's collection had "impeccable tailoring" but was not cohesive and had too many ideas. The panel thought that Althea's collection was "plugged in to the street" and that she "knows what's cool," but Irina's "edgy" "armor" made her the winner. I was watching with a friend who declared, "this is terrible television." I sighed and agreed, but felt the need to point out: It didn't used to be like this!
So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen. Adieu.

(Except the show returns in January!)