• Elin Nordgren isn't leaving Tiger Woods, but she is revising their prenup. A source claims she's "being paid a hefty seven-figure amount - immediately transferred into an account she alone controls - to stick with her husband."

• Elin has reportedly demanded a total rewrite of the couple's prenuptial agreement. Others say they're in marriage counseling, and a friend of the couple adds, "She and Tiger have had problems in the past, this is obviously as bad as it's ever been, but she's not leaving as of now." [MSNBC]
• Elin Nordegren reportedly called Jaimee Grubbs, Tiger Woods' alleged mistress, to confront her about her affair with her husband on Friday after his car crash. Grubbs told her co-workers that a woman called from an unidentified number and when she asked who it was, the woman said, "You know who this is because you're fucking my husband." [TMZ]
• Jaimee Grubbs told Us: "Elin has never called me as far as I know. I did get a call from an unknown number last Tuesday (the same day as Tiger left me a message), but I never picked up." [Us]
• A "friend," who claims Jaimee Grubbs told her all about the affair, says she asked her about Woods being married, "and she said that she just put a blind eye to it... She just played the dumb card and whenever it came up she just changed the subject or never let on that she knew he was married." [E!]
• Jaimee Grubbs told all of her co-stars on Tool Academy that she was having an affair with Tiger Woods. "We all knew about Jaimee's affair with Tiger Woods because she told us," said her castmate Aida Menaska. She also talked about the affair on camera. " I guess they cut it out because VH1 didn't want to cause problems for Tiger Woods and his wife," said Menaska. [Radar Online]
• Us editor Bradley Jacobs says that before the magazine posted the voicemail Jaimee Grubbs claims is from Tiger Woods it was vetted by the Us legal team. "It's very clear that this is Tiger's voice," Jacobs said. "He's a very recognizable figure. He's a billion dollar brand. We all know his voice. As soon as you hear it, you know it's Tiger." [CBS News]
• An attorney for Tiger Woods' neighbors says they saw him after his accident on Friday and his injuries were "consistent with a car wreck and inconsistent with him being beat up... The scratches on his face were consistent with someone who maybe was in a minor car accident and hit his head on the windshield. ... None of his injuries looked like he was beat up by his wife." [ESPN]
• Rachel Uchitel (Tiger Woods' other alleged mistress) and her lawyer Gloria Allred have been complaining about the paparazzi hounding them... so they had lunch at Spago and fed the photographers cookies afterwards. [TMZ]
• Roman Polanski will be placed under house arrest at his Alpine chalet on Friday. He will have to wear an electronic bracelet and stay in the house as officials decide whether to extradite him to the U.S. [AP]
• Michael Lohan gave a two-and-a-half hour deposition today against his former BFF Jon Gosselin for TLC's lawsuit against Jon. "They asked questions regarding my involvement on a business level with Jon Gosselin; deals that were negotiated, transactions that did occur and basically my deal with Michael Heller," said Lohan. "I think they have a very, very strong case, one that I definitely don't think they'll lose. So good luck to Jon." [Radar Online]
• Four people accused of breaking into the homes of Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, and other celebrities pleaded not guilty to felony burglary charges today, including alleged ringleader Nicholas Prugo. [AP]
• A judge has thrown out a defamation lawsuit filed against the Dixie Chicks by the stepfather of one of the three 8-year-old boys killed in Arkansas 15 years ago. The man says Natalie Maines accused him of being involved with their deaths because she made statements supporting the "West Memphis Three," the teenagers convicted of the crimes. [AP]
• BREAKING: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie held hands at a party hosted by George Clooney and Brad asked people how their Thanksgiving was. [Us]
• According to USA TODAY's Celebrity Heat Index, which measures media exposure, Angelina Jolie is this month's hottest celebrity, followed by Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. Kourtney Kardashian is the most popular reality star, to which we say, "Her?" [USA Today]
• Lily Allen has confirmed she's going to take "one or two years off from recording and performing music" after a concert at the O2 in London in March. She says she's going to start a record label, set up a fashion shop with her sister, and "spend some time in the home I've built for myself." [BBC]
• Sad news: David Beckham's 83-year-old grandfather died today of lung cancer. He and Becks were very close. [The Mirror]
• British Prime Minister Gordon Brown referred to Reese Witherspoon as Renee Zellweger when she visited Parliament to promote Refuge and Avon's global campaign against domestic violence. It wasn't just a slip of the tongue either. He said, 'I'm very grateful that Renee Witherspoon is leading this campaign. She spoke movingly at the funeral of Anthony Minghella and I welcome her to the House today," but Zellweger spoke at the memorial. [Daily Mail]
• Kate Hudson said of the pictures of her kissing A-Rod at the AMAs, "There's a guy that's shooting probably 60 frames a minute. That was a sideswipe on the cheek. That wasn't even a kiss. I quickly kissed the cheek. And I remember one of the headlines the next day said, MAKEOUT SESSION. What is wrong with people?" [People]
• Redmond O'Neal appeared in court today for a progress report and told the court, "I have been doing treatment awhile your honor... I want to do something different. I want to stay clean." The judge said, "I told you to turn it around, and it looks like you did." [Radar Online]
• Ugh. In the TV special Psychic Hollywood: The Search For Truth, which airs next week, Alana Stewart asks medium James Van Praagh to contact Farrah Fawcett. He says, "She (Fawcett) wants to thank you... and she's bringing these beautiful flowers." [Daily Express]
• Camila Alves, Matthew McConaughey's girlfriend, will hose the new season of Shear Genius. [People]
• Stevie Wonder broke down and nearly cried at the Rock and Roll 25th Hall of Fame Anniversary Concert while performing Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel." John Legend gave him a hug. [TMZ]
• Pamela Anderson is being sued for $5,000 by a contracting company for allegedly refusing to return tools and other supplies to one of the people who worked on her Malibu estate. [Radar Online]
• American Idol winner Fantasia Barrino is starring in a new VH1 reality show called Fantasia For Real, which debuts on January 11. [N.Y. Post]
• Sara Rue, the new spokeswoman for Jenny Craig says, "My weight has fluctuated my whole life, and because I've been on television since I was 11 years old, everyone has seen it." [People]
• A judge denied a request from Verne Troyer's ex-girlfriend to make her temporary restraining order against him permanent. [TMZ]
• Kimora Lee Simmons may return to judge America's Next Top Model next season. [E!]
• Kimora Lee Simmons would like you to know that, "Djimon Honsou and I enjoy discussing anything from politics to wine, and we have enriching, private, happy, balanced lives together... That's probably the thing that would shock people most: We do things like go to the grocery store and have fun with our kids. We're a normal family, doing the best we can." [People]
• "I don't want my children to feel they have a sense of entitlement," says Sarah Jessica Parker. "I want them to work hard and be challenged. That's hard to do when you have everything you need and want, so I am working on those values all the time." [People]
• When asked what she thinks of White House party crashers Michaele and Tareq Salahi, table-flipper Teresa Giudice of The Real Housewives of New Jersey said, "It's a little crazy... I wouldn't go to any place I wasn't invited to. It's poor etiquette. It's not my style." [Us]
• "It's just so natural for me to be married," says Khloe Kardashian. "I was never somebody who was a serious relationship person. Now I'm all in and it's so easy. It's so comfortable for him and I both." [People]
• "I would not advise any actor necessarily, if he was really thinking of his career, to come out," says Rupert Everett. "It just doesn't work and you're going to hit a brick wall at some point. You're going to manage to make it roll for a certain amount of time, but at the first sign of failure they'll cut you right off. And I'm sick of saying, 'Yes, it's probably my own fault.' Because I've always tried to make it work and when it stops working somewhere, I try to make it work somewhere else. But the fact of the matter is, and I don't care who disagrees, it doesn't work if you're gay." [The Sun]
• Will Ferrell says, "I would love to play Simon Cowell in a movie - heck, I would love it. It would be my dream role. He's become a legend in five years, nobody knew who he was five years ago and now he's one of the most famous people on TV. It wouldn't be that hard for me to play him because I see a lot of Ron Burgundy in Simon Cowell." [Daily Express]

• Nicole Richie has been complaining that she doesn't feel well for days, and now she's been hospitalized at Cedars-Sinai for pneumonia. Her rep says she's "doing well."

• On Sunday she Tweeted: "ok cold, it's been 6 days. Lets part ways graciously & keep it moving." [People]
• Amy Winehouse has spent a third night in the hospital after being admitted for mixing cold medications. [People]
• Michael Barrett has been officially charged with one count of interstate stalking for allegedly filming Erin Andrews in hotels around the country. [TMZ]
• Jennifer Lopez's ex-husband Ojani Noa claims he's been receiving death threats since threatening to sell the video they made during their honeymoon. "She's having him followed. We just ran the license plate of the car . . . and it goes directly back to Jennifer Lopez. Ojani's scared," says his lawyer. [N.Y. Post]
• Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt reportedly got into such a bad fight this morning that the police were called. An eyewitness said Doug got in his car, but Paris screamed, "don't go, don't go." He got out of the car and they started shoving each other. [TMZ]
• Paris Hilton denies that she and Doug Reinhart were fighting. She said: "Doug and I were in bed, sound asleep, when Doug's houseguests from hell got into an argument. We had nothing to do with it. Doug told the LAPD that his guests' fight was over and that we had nothing to do with it." [TMZ]
• Kate Major is planning to sue Jon Gosselin for breach of contract for violating their handwritten agreement. Kate resigned from her position at Star because, "Jon told her he would match the salary she was making at the magazine if she came to work for him as his personal employee," says a source. [Radar Online]
• Cindy Crawford's alleged extortionist, Edis Kayalar, cannot be extradited to the U.S. He turned himself in to German police on Monday, but the country doesn't have an extradition policy with the U.S. He is still facing charges because he's accused of emailing about transferring the money into a German bank account, which is against the law. [TMZ]
• The court has notified Roman Polanski's lawyers that a request has been made to allow TV coverage of his bail hearing on December 10. A judge hasn't decided if the cameras will be allowed or not. [N.Y.T.]
• Sarah Palin invited Levi Johnston to her house for Thanksgiving dinner on Oprah but he won't be attending. He told Playgirl it's "a nice gesture, but she didn't mean it." He said having dinner with the Palins would be "awkward." [People]
• The Sarah Palin interview gave Oprah Winfrey her biggest audience in two years. [Politico]
• We thought everyone knew this already, but Radar Online his confirmed that Carrie Prejean was over 18 when she took those nude pictures by analyzing her tan lines in various states of undress. It's unclear why she couldn't have tan lines at 17. [Radar Online]
• Carrie Prejean's dad says of her sex tapes, "The personal information they are bringing out against Carrie is irrelevant to anything." Will Prejean continues, "Carrie is supposed to be doing all of these TV appearances to promote her book, and everyone can only focus on the tapes... I'm not someone who looks backwards. I think we need to look to the future. Why isn't anyone talking about the charity work and all of the charitable organizations that Carrie's involved in?" [E!]
• In an interview on Good Morning America, Janet Jackson admitted that Michael Jackson's family staged several interventions about his drug use but "weren't very successful." She says he understood "that it was out of love," but in these situations, "people tend to be in denial." [TMZ]
• Somehow "Michael Jackson's estate" is fighting with Janet Jackson because her new song "Make Me" includes the line "Don't stop till you get it up," even though the people in charge of MJ's estate say they're unaware of the dispute. [ET]
• Sources say Evan Chandler, the father of the boy who accused Michael Jackson of molesting him, had been estranged from his family for three years before he committed suicide earlier this month and had changed his appearance with plastic surgery to avoid a backlash from the case. [Radar Online]
• Michael Jackson's kids attended the L.A. premiere of New Moon and avoided the paparazzi by sneaking in a side door. A friend says, "They loved it." [Showbiz 411]
• Whoa. Miley Cyrus may be the only 16-year-old who isn't into Twilight. "I've never seen it and nor will I ever," said Miley. "I don't believe in it... I don't like vampires. I don't like the wolf that pops out of the screen when I'm watching my TV at night. I don't like it. I don't want anything to do with it. I don't like the shirts. I don't like any of it." [People]
• Kristen Stewart says her character Bella "Has a lot of really innate female qualities... For a character in literature, I think it's awesome that so many girls can look up to her, because she's fickle and unabashedly (so)." [Reuters]
• Robert Pattinson says in his pre-Twilight life, "I loved driving around L.A. I know not a lot of people say that, but if you don't have to get anywhere, L.A. is the best place to drive 'round in. I used to have this little car, a convertible ... and I really do miss doing that, as the sun is going down, driving over the mountains. It's a great thing and I kind of do miss that a little bit. It's not really the same thing when you've got 10 cars following you." [AP]
• "I don't think there's something particularly alluring or topical about vampires right now that our generation takes to. I think it's more just that Stephenie [Meyer] wrote these characters with really creative, really gloried character traits. He's a vampire - he sucks blood and all that - but being a vampire is really just a symbol of who he is. I think if you take all of the mythical aspects away from the story, these characters would still be interesting. And they'd still stand. That's what people have become addicted to. At least concerning the fans. I don't think it's a vampire thing." — Kristen Stewart [Time]
• New Moon director Chris Weitz says he's quitting making movies after doing one more film. "Every time I make a movie I'm pretty much convinced it's the last time I'm going to be able to do it and that really it's a rather silly occupation to undertake," he says. "But I think I have maybe one more film in me." [People]
• Pamela Anderson says she has told her sons about the sex tape she made with Tommy Lee. "I knew the kids were going to watch [Borat] and there was a reference to the tape in the movie and they're that age and, you know, people are going start saying things," she said. "I just said, 'Look, Mummy and Daddy were massively in love, we videotaped everything, everything was videotaped, and you're probably going hear about something at school.'" [The Sun]
• Pamela Anderson says, "I've tried it (cocaine) and I don't like it. I'm completely hyper and it actually doesn't work for me. I've dabbled in things." [Contact Music]
• Nicolas Cage, a U.N. ambassador, went to a jail in Kenya to talk to the suspected Somali pirates. "Then I'm in a position where I can actually make some sense and talk about it when I go back to the States where I go talk to different U.N. councils and discuss the matter," Cage said. [AP]
• Andrew Lloyd Webber has be re-admitted to the hospital after developing an infection following surgery for prostate cancer. [AP]
• Penny Marshall has liver cancer, according to The National Enquirer. "Most people would have been devastated, crying on the shoulder of friends and family. But not Penny - she was angry!" said a family source. "The last thing Penny wants is for anyone to feel sorry for her." [National Enquirer]
• Jennifer Hudson will play Winnie Mandela in Winnie, Clint Eastwood's movie about Nelson Mandela's ex-wife. "I was compelled and moved when I read the script," Hudson said. "Winnie Mandela is a complex and extraordinary woman, and I'm honored to be the actress asked to portray her. This is a powerful part of history that should be told." [People]
• Clint Eastwood says the U.S. is "becoming more juvenile as a nation. The guys who won World War II and that whole generation have disappeared, and now we have a bunch of teenage twits..." [Daily Express]
• The Black Eyed Peas' manager, Liborio Molina, won't face charges for punching Perez Hilton in the back of the head. Here's what Molina wrote: 'I apologize for what I did on June 22 of 2009, even though you engaged in highly offensive comments, including a homophobic slur to my clients, I acknowledge that these kinds of issues should not be resolved through a physical response." [TMZ]
• Liborio Molina has also agreed not to contact Perez HIlton and cannot carry any weapons for a year. [AP]
• Precious will be awarded the Producers Guild of America's Stanley Kramer Award, which goes to a film that tackles provocative social issues in a constructive way. [N.Y.T.]
• Kirstie Alley Tweeted about being the butt of Conan O'Brien's fat jokes saying, "ONE BITCH I'm gonna knck [sic] out next time I see her is CONAN O'BITCH O'BRIAN [sic]. That guy acts like I bit his dick off." Star Jones Tweeted back: "You know Conan probably 'wanted some' and you chumped him...I know a few brothers from Brooklyn who owe me! LOL" [Us]
• Roger Moore was named the 2009 Person of the Year by the U.K. branch of PETA for campaigning against foie gras. [Reuters]
• Mariah Carey was late to the British show This Morning, so host Phillip Schofield Tweeted: "Sitting here twiddling our thumbs waiting for Mariah Carey. la la la laaa," before adding: "It's her album... which we will talk about IF she hurries up!" [The Sun]
• Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair got into a fight at a press conference in Australia. Some say it was staged to promote a wrestling even, but in the picture at the link Hogan's head is coated in blood. [TMZ]
• Fantasia Barrino's fans are upset because she's dating a married father of two who left his wife and kids to move in with her. [Star]
• Robin Williams, who split from his wife of 19 years in 2008, has found love again with graphic designer Susan Schneider. A source said, "Robin truly believes it's no coincidence that Susan came into his life right before his heart operation. He told a pal, 'She saved me - she helped me heal.'" [Daily Express]
• Tyra Banks tried to get model Jessica White, who has been seen holding hands with Sean Penn, to confirm that they're dating, but she said, "I hold hands with my friends." [Us]
• Daniel Radcliffe will guest star in The Simpsons' "Treehouse of Horror XXI" next season. [ONTD]
• Hugh Jackman has forgiven his mother for abandoning the family when he was young, and was spotted spending time with her in New York yesterday. "My mother was not well," Jackman has said. "I always hoped she would come back, but I never blamed her for anything that went wrong. At the time, I was miserable and angry, and my brothers and I used to fight all the time." [News.com.au]
• Carrie Underwood says she isn't moving in with her boyfriend Mike Fisher. "Call me old-fashioned. He's there. I'm here... We're both doing our thing and it's good. The next guy I move in with will be my hubby. Whoever that is. I'm not saying it's going to be him." [People]
• Jessica Simpson Tweeted about her sister Ashlee Simpson-Wentz's Broadway debut: "I can't wait to watch @ashsimpsonwentz on broadway in all of her glory!!! I get chillbumps from toes to noggin thinking about it!!! YAY!!!!!" [Us]
• Pete Wentz said, "I just spent the last weekend – Mom was rehearsing for Chicago – being Dad without a nanny, without Mom, and didn't burn the house down, so I'm pretty excited about that." [People]
• Jessica Szohr says "we had fun" shooting the Gossip Girl threesome. "Penn is really easy to work with and very professional and [so is] Hilary," Szohr said. "We just went with it and tried to make it as easy as possible." [Us]
• Sandra Bullock says her family didn't like her going blonde for The Blind Side. "It was entertaining for a couple of months but it's not really my color palette," she said. Her husband didn't like it either. "Thank God an important person in my life didn't want me being blonde. He was like, ‘I don't like the blonde on you. You want him to say that!" [People]
• "I want boobs, a gentle six-pack and a perky butt," says Amanda Peet. "If I could choose an ideal body, I'd take Gisele Bunchen's. I challenge anyone to say she wouldn't want Gisele's body, deep down... Actually, I'd take a number of people's bodies. I'd take Jennifer Aniston's, too." [People]
• Susan Sarandon is going to meet table tennis legend Jan-Ove Waldner when she travels to Stockholm to receive an award next week. "It was on her initiative, we just made the effort to find him," says Git Scheynius, director of the Stockholm Film Festival. "She's actually involved in a table tennis club in New York — that's one of her greatest hobbies." [Reuters]
• "I feel like I have learned a lot. The movies could not be more different," says Penelope Cruz of her upcoming films Nine and Broken Embraces. "To be able to sing for the first time professionally and dance, it was a scary experience. Broken Embraces is like three women in one. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world." [Reuters]
• Vera Farmiga says she was drawn to the film Up In The Air because, "I thought it was a refreshing spin on feminine desire. It's something you don't too often get to see, a woman being so demanding and libertine and unapologetic about her sexual prowess. She's an adventuress; she's a full-blown romantic operative. That was pretty exciting. And tricky. Because usually, female characters who are so masculine in their needs can come across as lacking dignity. Alex represents to me what's so hard about being a woman, post-feminist. Wanting it all: a family, a career. That sort of pendulum between romance and respectability, virgin-whore, all these lady problems we have to contend with and there will never be an answer to. A modern heroine of sorts." [L.A.T.]
• Heidi Klum says she's wearing something sexy when she hosts the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show, even though she wants to lose weight. "I have some great one-of-a-kind latex pieces that were made for me. I figure why not? I embrace that I have more curves right now," said Klum, "I'm definitely one of the heaviest of the bunch of the 30 girls in the show. And I still have 20 lbs. to go... But why not? I like my outfit. I like the way it looks on me." [People]
• "I have a really big scrapbook. I still actually have these notes that Marty Scorsese wrote to me while we were making The Age of Innocence. I save everything. I definitely have that gene in me. Someone was telling me about this show called Hoarders. I was like, 'Oh no!' I save everything. I'm scared I might be a hoarder." — Winona Ryder [Daily Express]
• Martha Stewart says Rachael Ray is "more of an entertainer ... with her bubbly personality, than she is a teacher, like me. That's not what she's professing to be," adding, "To me, she professed that she could — cannot bake... She — just did a new cookbook which is just a re-edit of a lot of her old recipes. She — and that's not good enough for me." Rachael Ray responded: "Why would it make me mad?... Her skill set is far beyond mine. That's simply the reality of it... I'd rather eat Martha's than mine, too." [Us]

• Justin Timberlake will attempt to finish what Ann Curry started: He'll head to Tanzania and climb Mount Kilimanjaro.

Timberlake's goal is to raise awareness of the global water crisis. Rapper Lupe Fiasco and singer Kenna are going with him (?!). He says: "I've been training four times a week to get my VO2 (oxygen consumption) levels up to expand my lungs. We'll climb a week straight, carrying 30 pounds on our backs. It's going to be intense, but it's going to be so rewarding. We're going to be ready for it." [Mirror via GQ]

• High times: Amy Winehouse and Snoop Dogg collaborated last year, but were too stoned to finish the tracks! [The Sun]
• But Amy has been getting all detoxed in St. Lucia — she does a lot of mud treatments to draw out impurities. [TMZ]
• Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are mentioned as a cheap ploy for attention in this beyond stoopid press release. [Breitbart]
• Mel Gibson has "fled" to Costa Rica with his "mystery blonde." [Daily Express]
• Why hasn't Eminem been on the scene for three years? He's been on drugs. He says: "I wasn't ready mentally. I wasn't ready to give up the drugs. I didn't think that I had a problem. Basically, I went in, and I came out. I relapsed, and I spent the next three years struggling with it. Also, at that time, I felt like I wanted to pull back, because my drug problem had got so bad." He was also impacted by the death of his friend Proof: "I think it kind of hit me so hard. It just blindsided me. I just went into such a dark place that, with everything, the drugs, my thoughts, everything. And the more drugs I consumed, and it was all depressants I was taking, the more depressed I became, the more self-loathing I became." [XXL via The Sun]
• ZOMG Lindsay and Sam ran into each other. [Page Six]
• This report insinuates that Justin Long is super into Drew Barrymore, while she's all, we're just friends. [Gatecrasher]
• Kate Moss had to cut short a vacay in the Maldives because her boyfriend and her gal pal weren't getting along. [Daily Mail]
• Jennifer Aniston and Steve Zahn have a sex scene in the new movie Management. But poor Jen still can't escape being compared to Angelina; this column notes: "While it's no Mr. & Mrs. Smith, let's just say Mike (Zahn) ends up with his shirt off and his pants down to his ankles and Sue (Aniston) on her back on top of a table." [E!]
• The producers of Slumdog Millionaire have donated $740,000 to children living in Indian slums. [People]
• Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia has renewed Martha Stewart's contract and will pay Martha Stewart at least $2 million for the next three years so she can continue living as Martha Stewart. [WSJ]
• Even though In Touch reported that Kate Hudson would be on , she apparently doesn't "do" TV. The rumor is "not true," says her rep. [E!]
• Matthew Perry on Lost? "It is not true," says Perry. "I really don't know why those rumors have been floating about. I have admitted I am a Lost junkie. And at the press junket for [17 Again] I was asked what my favorite TV show was and I said [Lost], so maybe that's how they started." [EW]
• Mandy Moore got help for her new acoustic rock album Amanda Leigh from her "in-home teacher," husband Ryan Adams. [Mirror]
• Lady GaGa rocked the gay bash known as the Palm Springs White Party. She has said: "I love the gay community. Like bleeding heart love the gay community…it's a genuine love I have for them." [NBC Bay Area]
• Audrina on her new reality show: "It's my life after The Hills, my journey. It's going to be a little spicier, edgier, older." We think this means drunken makeout sessions. [People]
• Keisha Knight Pulliam, aka Rudy from The Cosby Show, is getting her own reality show on Oxygen, which involves her live-in boyfriend and will "explore what it's like to be "young, rich, single and co-habitating." The show will be called "Keisha and Kaseem." [AP]
• Guess who else is getting a reality show? Fantasia Barrino. [Reuters]
• Which Idol judge should go: Kara or Paula? [MSNBC]
• It seems that Bruce Springsteen is the "victim" in that NJ divorce scandal where the wife was calling him the other man in her marriage. A source says: "The wife pestered Bruce, but he didn't have an affair with her. He's freaked out that he was named in her divorce because he barely knows her." [National Enquirer]
• Daniel Radcliffe says the kissing scene between Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley is awkward: "Harry's got a real thing for her, and that is slightly odd because when we met I was 11 and she was nine." [Telegraph]
• Speaking of Harry Potter, the Half Blood Prince flick will open two days sooner. [NY Daily News]
• Uh, they are really squeezing the life out of this franchise: There will be a 5th Fast and Furious film. [NY Daily News]
• Miss USA contestants will wear swimsuits from the Jessica Simpson Collection Sunday night. [NY Daily News]
• Real Housewife Jill Zarin had a breast reduction and "feels 20 lbs lighter." [Page Six]
• Sean "Diddy" Combs has just been cast in a Judd Apatow flick, along with Elisabeth Moss and Rose Byrne. Get Him To The Greek stars Jonah Hill and Russell Brand, and the gist of it is that a record label intern (Hill) is hired to get an out-of-control rock star (Brand) from London to a gig at the Greek Theater in L.A. While it might have been interesting if things were shaken up a bit, Diddy plays the record label boss while Moss and Byrne play girlfriends. Of course. [Hollywood Reporter]
• David Duchovny and Tea Leoni are so back on they have matching tattoos now. [Daily Express]
• Catherine Keener has been cast in a fantasy/adventure flick called Percy Jackson, in which she will play a mom whose son is half human (his father is Poseidon). [Hollywood Reporter]
• Here's a profile on legendary producer Jon Peters, whose memoir is "filled with outrageous tales of Jack Nicholson and hookers, and Barbara Walters in her undies." he may have told a room of people that Baba Wawa had "a great rack and nice ass." [The Daily Beast]
• After saying that he "totally understands OJ" Simpson, Hulk Hogan has issued a statement, claiming he "in no way condones the OJ situation. As part of a larger conversation, he referred to it to exemplify his frustration with his own situation." [ET]
• Meanwhile Linda Hogan says she is "taking these recent comments seriously." [ET]
• "Electroclash godmother Peaches and voodoo loving rave producer Drums of Death get together in the latest issue of Dazed & Confused to talk about drugs, power ballads, performance art, their favourite fancy dress costumes, and working together on her new album I Feel Cream." [Dazed Digital]
• Former "pin-up" Heather Thomas has written a novel called Trophies, about Hollywood wives and fundraising. She says: "I researched this and found these wives are responsible for directing about 80 percent of the foundation monies in America. It is the wives who have the time and can draw things to their husband's attention. Trophy wives are seen as charms on a man's arm, but I have come in contact with a lot of billionaires and their wives are busy and often have PhDs and are brilliant businesswomen. I've yet to meet a bimbo trophy wife." [Reuters]
• A former publicist for James Brown is suing for control of his estate. [USA Today]
• Actress Tawny Kitaen has settled a fraud suit against her ex, so you can go back to not thinking about her. [AP]
• Blind item! "Which funnyman doesn't even bother to hide his drug habit? When pals come to visit his pad, they're just as likely to see baggies of cocaine lying around as they are to see throw pillows." [Gatecrasher]
• "Your blob [sic] is very funny and clever. You have so much fun with it. No wonder everyone loves it." — Diablo Cody's mom. [Page Six]
• "When the show started it was such a different beast. It was exciting and dangerous and funny and edgy and bizarre. [Then] it started feeling a little complacent, and that was very frustrating… When you have a jewel, why not polish it and put it out there for all to see?" — Nicolette Sheridan on Desperate Housewives, which she felt never gave her character enough attention. (Her last episode airs Sunday.) [LA Times]
• "Edie's already slept with most of the guys on the street and has caused about as many problems as she could. We will find a new kind of sexiness coming through Wisteria Lane. What I won't do is cast another fortysomething sexy blonde. [Sheridan] performed the aging neighborhood tramp better than anyone has ever done before." — Desperate Housewives creator Marc Chery. [LA Times]
• "I think a wedding is about love, friends, family and fun. I think spending millions of dollars on a wedding is ridiculous and it has never been my dream. I would never do that." — Salma Hayek, denying she is planning an extravagant $2 million ceremony to follow her City Hall nuptials in February. [People]
• "I think this movie presents the relationship between the media and the government - and it's kind of interesting because it says that the institutions are both a little bit corrupt." — Ben Affleck, on State Of Play. [LA Times]
• "I have a little blog that I do with some friends, but beyond that, I'm kind of clueless when it comes to the Internet. I just got e-mail down pat. So I've got to speed it up, I guess. But I tend to get my news from the radio. I don't know why, it's just the way I like it." — Rachel McAdams. [LA Times]
• "I kind of value having people not know where I am or what I'm doing." — Zac Efron, who avoids MySpace and Facebook. [Reuters]
• "I have never seen that (From Justin to Kelly), other than the time I had to sit through it at the premiere. I was contractually obligated to, and I fought that with tears - I did not want to do that movie." — Kelly Clarkson. [MSNBC Scoop via Rolling Stone]

• Nancy Pelosi left a health-care forum at the White House to meet with Brad Pitt. This piece calls them "Brancy." [WaPo]

• Everybody on Capitol Hill was atwitter over Brad Pitt being in their midst; Rep. James E. Clyburn says: "I did not realize when the Speaker asked me to chair the Katrina/Rita task force that it would lead to my getting in a position to make my grandchildren so envious of me, because this effort brought the two of us — Brad Pitt and myself together." [Politico]
• This headline sums it up: "Capitol Hill Goes Gaga Over Brad Pitt." [USA Today]
• Back in September, Amy Winehouse was involved in some kind of "incident" (uh, which one?) and now she has been charged with assault. Run back to St. Lucia! [People]
• Oh yeah: It was when she punched a fan who asked for a picture. [The Sun, Daily Mail]
• Um, Amy's husband Blake Fielder-Civil is "besotted" with Francesca Morralee, who is 17. [The Sun]
• Chris Brown appeared in court yesterday but did not enter a plea. His arraignment was delayed until April 6. [People]
  
• Here's a picture of two "fans" outside Chris Brown's court hearing yesterday, with signs which read "I love you Chris." [Concrete Loop]
• After Chris Brown was charged with two felonies, one of Rihanna's relatives told People: "It's about time." [People]
• Rihanna's lawyer told Chris Brown: "I think Rihanna would like this over as quickly as possible. It benefits everybody." Then Brown's own lawyer told Brown: "I've explained it to you that the best thing that could happen in this case is, Don [Rihanna's lawyer] is involved. Didn't I tell you that?" [LA Times]
• Nine days passed before Chris Brown apologized to Rihanna for beating her. [Fox 411]
• The reason Usher backed down on his criticism of Chris Brown? Rihanna. Trying to show support for Rihanna. [MSNBC]
• Chris Brown "hit the town" after his court appearance. Not really… He hung out at a hotel bar with bodyguards. [TMZ]
• What the goop was Gwyneth Paltrow doing getting into a chauffeur-driven car with Christiane Amanpour? [Page Six]
• Jewel and Nancy O'Dell have both withdrawn from Dancing With The Stars due to injuries suffered during rehearsals. What the hell goes on at that show? [People]
• Girls Next Door star Holly Madison will replace Jewel and Nancy. [NY Daily News]
• It may have sounded like there were screaming masses at Michael Jackson's press conference, but there were only 25 people including press. [Gatecrasher]
• But! People trying to get "pre-sale" tickets for Jackson's show are complaining that the website is effed. [Telegraph]
• Even though Heath Ledger's dad told a reporter that the family planned to keep Heath's Oscar "forever," it will actually go to Michelle Williams. Today. She will hold it for Matilda. [LA Times]
• WTF. This report begins, "Madonna has offered a gnarly old hand to Sienna Miller…" [Daily Star]
• Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony were "in tears" watching American Idol finalist Jorge Nuñez. [E!]
• "Regis Philbin Blackmail Shocker!" [National Enquirer]
• David Beckham will stay with AC Milan until the end of the season and will return next season, but he'll be "timeshared" with the LA Galaxy between July and October. [Daily Mail]
• "Flip-flopping" Bachelor Jason Mesnick swears he is not a jerk. [MSNBC]
• Shh! Don't tell anyone, but Lucy Liu is an artist, painting under the pseudonym Yu Ling. Snap up her portrait of two people kissing for a mere $28,000. [Page Six]
• It's all baby-talk all the time on the set of Ugly Betty. [People]
• For an episode of Oprah's show, Dennis Quaid and his wife returned to the hospital where their twins were given an overdose of blood thinner. [AP]
• Vince Vaughn is engaged and the lady is named Kyla Weber; she's a Canadian real estate agent. [Gatecrasher]
• Simon Cowell and ex Terri Seymour went on a dinner date. Cue the "ooooohhhh!" [Daily Mail]
• Gossip Girl's Matthew Settle and his wife welcomed a daughter, Aven Angelica, yesterday. [People]
• "LSD, Easter Island, science fiction and, of course, Lorne Michaels, all played a role in developing the Coneheads sketch for Saturday Night Live. [Page Six]
• Joe Francis denies he accidentally bumped into Brody Jenner's girlfriend at a club, which sparked a screaming match. Joe, ever the pacifist, says: "There was no physical contact, but if you're Brody Jenner and dating an ugly piece of trash…you should expect these types of altercations." [Page Six]
• Ghostface has written a song for Rihanna. Sample lyrics: "Shake it off, wake up… Pretty lady, come about yourself…" [Concrete Loop]
• Fantasia Barrino returns to the musical The Color Purple for a five week stint in Washington DC. [Variety]
• Mark Wahlberg will star in a "dark thriller" which this piece calls "one of the hottest scripts in town." It's set in Boston, so Wahlberg can do his best "Say hello to your mother for me." [The Hollywood Reporter]
• DNA tests prove that Jerry Lewis has a daughter — he mother had an affair with the entertainer back in 1952. He has not publicly acknowledged the woman as his daughter, but his son agreed to a DNA test because "everybody deserves to know where they came from and who they are." [UPI]
• Blind item: "Which flowery former wild child had a bad sexual experience with the creator of a hit TV show - but went for another round because 'she'll try anything twice'?" [Gatecrasher]
• R.I.P. Sydney Chaplin, Charlie Chaplin's son and Tony-award winning actor. [AP]
• "My dad is more of a rock star than me. He embraces the lifestyle. People think having your dad on tour would cramp your style. But I don't have any style - he's got all the right moves. He's living the dream. I am going to check he hasn't trashed the hotel room before we leave each city." — Chris Martin. [The Sun]
• "The biggest thing for me is that I am now going to have to choose between work - this script or that script. Until now, my roles have chosen me; my career has been shaped essentially by never saying no. But now I will have to say no. I just hope l'll be wise in my choosing." — Melissa Leo, about her life post-Oscar nomination. [Guardian]
• "So when I do go out with him I sit and get progressively more pissed, and he's one of those annoying people who remembers everything. I go to him, 'Just have a fucking beer! One beer!' And he says to me that if he has one beer he'll probably end up in a crack house in Kings Cross within 40 minutes. I'm like, ‘Brilliant, I'll come with you.'" — Noel Gallagher, on hanging out with Russell Brand, who does not drink. [The Sun]
• "It's fine if Tori wants her own reality show or wants to write books about her childhood. I just wish she'd leave me out of it. She has plenty to talk about without saying things like, 'I wish I were closer to my mother,' or 'Did you see what my mother wrote on her Web site?' I wish she would call me, rather than say on television, 'I should call my mom.'" — Candy Spelling, whose autobiography, Stories From Candy-Land, is out at the end of the month. [Gatecrasher]
• "Dave [Stewart] and I talk to each other only rarely these days, and I can't see another reunion. He lives in America and I'm over here. We're both working on our own things. For me, it would feel like a step backwards and I want to keep moving forward. I enjoy multi-tasking, so I want to do a lot of different things. I want to keep all the plates spinning." — Annie Lennox. [Daily Mail]
• "I am in perfect health. I'm in very good shape and feeling very good." — Hugh Hefner, knocking down reports that her was "far from his normally alert self" at a recent party. [Yahoo News via E!]
• "It doesn't vacuum, it doesn't wash the dishes or stuff like that." — Charlize Theron, joking about her Oscar. [The Star]
• "I'd love to work with Amy Winehouse. She has a very distinct, sexy, soulful voice and she writes great lyrics." — John Legend. [Mirror]
• "[The role reminds me of ] a period of my life where I had to work several jobs to pay my bills. Something would go wrong and you'd have to take another job to get your car running. That was very real for me." — Amy Adams, on Sunshine Cleaning. [WSJ]

[Los Angeles,March 20. Image via INFDaily.com]

• It goes without saying that the biggest news of the week was Jamie Lynn Spears' underage spermination.
  
• But she's not the only one! Fantasia and Lily Allen are also up the stick.
  
• Stars are also pregnant with hair. A look back at the year in weaves.
  
• In other news, ur-douche Paul Janka did not date rape Moe. Imagine that!
  
• But if he had, British politician John Redwood probs would have let him go, but not without a stern talking-to. Because it wasn't stranger rape or anything.
  
• The beauty and fashion industries are still trying to sell us a lot of whitewashed models and junk science.
  
• But it's the holidays, bitches! So go fall into an egg nog coma whilst watching the Spice Girls, you fucking dykes!