• Lady Gaga was seen partying in West Hollywood with a "boy-toy."

They were dancing and drinking and wearing matching studded ensembles. They drank champagne and left early. Get it girl! [E!]

• Steven Tyler has entered rehab to deal with his addiction to pain killers. In a statement, he says: "With the help of my family and team of medical professionals, I am taking responsibility for the management of my pain and am eager to be back on the stage and in the recording studio with my bandmates… I love Aerosmith." Apparently Tyler has suffered injuries over the last decade that left him with "severe chronic pain" and he'll need additional surgeries on his knees and feet. [People]
• Peaches Geldof started — or fueled — a Twitter rumor that Miley Cyrus was dead. Not cool. [Perez]
• A judge has ruled that Britney Spears will remain under the conservatorship of her father for six months to a year. Say what you will, but it seems to be working. [TMZ, Radar Online]
• Cue Twihard squee: The first still from Eclipse, the third Twilight movie, has been released. FLOWERS. SPARKLE VAMP. MOPE. [ONTD via MTV]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Tiger Woods' ladyfriend Rachel Uchitel is not, repeat, not pregnant. You may hear otherwise, especially if you read Star magazine. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Jake Gyllenhaal was spotted partying in New York with Matt Dillon, Justin Theroux and Mark Ronson. An axis of hotness. [People]
• Lindsay Lohan was seen drinking in L.A. with Kevin Connolly and Leonardo DiCaprio. [People]
• Recently-released FBI documents show that police thought that terrorists would attack Michael Jackson's trial because of the "worldwide media coverage" it would attract. In addition, the FBI monitored MJ for over a decade. [ABC News via AP]
• Dr. Conrad Murray, who is still being investigated in the death of Michael Jackson, will star in a TV special. A British documentary crew shot footage of him as he returned to work. Of course, the show can't air until the investigation is complete, which could be a couple of years. [TMZ]
• Brittany Murphy was working on multiple film projects before her death, and one director she worked with says: "She knew her material, and she was on her game. She was professional. She was there for me. She was healthy." He adds that her husband and her dog were often on set with her: "The two of them really took care of each other,. He was her teddy bear, and she was just his little princess." [AP]
• Brittany Murphy's role in a romcom called Shrinking Charlotte will have to be recast. [TMZ]
• An expert — forensic pathologist Dr. Cyril Wecht — is convinced that Brittany Murphy's death was the result of an overdose. "One [drug that she took] was involved with Michael Jackson, Ativan. One of them was a drug that was involved with Anna Nicole Smith, Klonopin.'' [Miami Herald]
• Information about which prescription drugs were in Brittany Murphy's house was posted on TMZ, and the Coroner's office is "furious" that the details were leaked. How does TMZ get this stuff? [Mirror]
• Brittany Murphy's funeral will be held tomorrow, Christmas Eve. [Radar Online]
• Why didn't Gabby Sidibe win an African-American Film Critics Association best actress award? A nefarious theory, at the link. [NY Mag]
• It seems that instead of Dr. Watson, people are calling Jude Law "Hotson." Jude says: "Mostly I was only hot because I was wearing those thick tweed suits, massive overcoats and hat and gloves. I was always the one perspiring on set." [ABC News via AP]
• For the final show of Pink's tour, her husband Carey Hart came out on stage and had her dancers strip him down to his underwear. Then Pink straddled him. God I love these two. [Perez]
• Mischa Barton tried to take her dog into Whole Foods and was pissed when she wasn't allowed. She should have shown the security guy her mangled hand, maybe he'd have some sympathy! [Gatecrasher]
• Christina Aguilera was in a minor fender bender last night. [TMZ]
• T.I. is out of prison already? [AP]
• The stalker/fan accused of harassing Ashanti's mother was convicted yesterday and faces 2 years in prison. [ABC News via AP]
• Rihanna went to a comedy club with Ludacris. [E!]
• Heiress vs. heiress: Casey Johnson is jealous of Paris Hilton? [Page Six]
• If you think Sarah Silverman and Demetri Martin are funny, you're in luck: They're both returning to Comedy Central in February. [NY Mag]
• The Karate Kid remake starring Will Smith's son looks okay, except that Jackie Chain's stache is creptastic. Trailer at the link. [NY Mag]
• An animated version of Ricky Gervais's podcast: In the works. [NY Mag]
• The Edge says that U2 wrote a song for the soundtrack of the Tobey Maguire/Natalie Portman/Jake Gyllenhaal movie Brothers after being asked by director Jim Sheridan — and after seeing the film: "We didn't have anything (ready) but were just going to work on some music. We had a couple of interesting beginnings, but then we saw a rough cut of the film, and that gave us the inspiration." [USA Today]
• Ugh, Dance Your Ass Off got renewed. Season 2 begins next year; there were auditions in NYC yesterday. [ET]
• Kristin Scott Thomas has dropped out of an upcoming Paris production of A Little Night Music because she injured her foot. [Variety]
• True Blood scoop: Lafayette is getting a boyfriend. [EW]
• The LAPD held rapper Kid Cudi at gunpoint yesterday in a case of mistaken identity. Driving while black? [Reuters]
• Megan Mullally will return to Broadway in a Terrence McNally's play Lips Together, Teeth Apart. I miss Karen! [LA Times]
• Boy George wanted to be on Celebrity Big Brother, but a British court is saying that he can't, since he's still on probation and could make thousands from the appearance. [AP]
• Randy and Evi Quaid were in court yesterday and pleaded not guilty to skipping out on a $10,000 hotel bill. [AP]
• Does the $42,000 the Balloon Boy parents have been fined seem like enough? [Daily Mail]
• The Vatican hearts The Simpsons. [AP]
• The recession has hit Oscar campaigns, which are more low-key than usual. [Reuters]
• And yet: For the first time, U.S. and Candadian ticket sales have crossed the $10 billion mark. [Reuters]
• Paging Nurse Jackie fans: Mo-Mo the gay guy is off the show. [Gatecrasher]
• Justin Long gave out toys to homeless children, who look unimpressed by him in these photos. [ONTD]
• "I've been active all my life. And I haven't smoked in a long time. The reason and I can get through this show is that I eat right. I don't eat red meat. I eat chicken and fish. And salad. And steamed vegetables, occasionally roasted. I don't eat desserts. And I don't drink, well, maybe a glass of wine now and then. This sounds like a laughable way to live. But it's me. It's a good, healthy life. I'm not good at doing nothing… I don't know what retirement means." — Estelle Parsons, 82, who has just landed a role in Tony Award-winning play August: Osage County. [Reuters]
• "I can't say that I noticed anything that led me to believe, 'Oh my God, this person is messed up.' But one hears rumblings. It's a small town, and you hear from other people on other crews, but that's all rumors and stuff. [When she did 8 Mile] I was feeling — maybe not just then at that particular time, but over time — that she was maybe being pressured to be a certain body type and a certain kind of actress as far as playing the sexy, blonde, thin girl… And that she was buying into what she was supposed to be, rather than just being a wonderful, innocent young girl." — Clueless director Amy Heckerling, who says she is "shocked and angry" about Brittany Murphy's death and doesn't understand why no one was "watching out with what was going on with her." [ET]
• "It's too hard to live on a planet where you're a monster for not being moved by Susan Boyle's performance." — Michael Cera, to Maxim. [Page Six]
• "I hate Christmas. When I used to drink, it was a good excuse to get drunk for two weeks. Now I just hate it. [In 2003[ I was in a coma for a while, so I missed Christmas. Thank God." — Ozzy Osbourne. [Gatecrasher via Contact Music]
• "I have read the first two episodes and I can tell you that I will be singing and dancing. I can't tell you what I'm singing because it's top-secret. It's a very cold song." — Jane Lynch, aka your fave misanthrope, Sue Sylvester, on the next chunk of episodes of Glee. [ONTD via SheWired]

• Tom Cruise is being sued by Michael David Sapir, who he sued in 2001 after Sapir claimed he had a video of Cruise "engaged in a homosexual relationship." Now Sapir says Cruise hired a P.I. to wiretap his phone.

He says the wiretapping took place during the 2001 case, which was later settled. Afterwards, both parties issued a statement saying the tape never existed. [TMZ]

• An autopsy was performed today on Brittany Murphy. Sources say there were no signs of foul play, but nothing that pointed to a cause of death either. Now the coroner is waiting for the toxicology report and other lab tests come back. [TMZ]
• The LAPD has concluded its preliminary investigation into the death of Brittany Murphy and sources say there is no evidence of foul play. [TMZ ]
• In this article, Brittany Murphy's "friends" say she got addicted to prescription drugs after having plastic surgery, used cocaine, and had an eating disorder. "We have been very worried something like this was about to happen. Brittany has been living life on the edge. She definitely had a drug problem and we have all begged her to seek help. Sadly our words fell on deaf ears," said the source. [The Sun]
• Ashton Kutcher, who dated Brittany Murphy, showed up to a book signing for Kabbalah leader Yehuda Berg on Sunday afternoon, but an eyewitness says he "looked visibly shaken when he arrived. He was physically there to support Berg, but mentally he was on another planet." [Star]
• This video isn't all that interesting, but it now seems creepy in light of Brittany Murphy's death. At a public appearance, she says to a reporter, "Can I have your hair in my next life please?" The reporter replies, "Can I be you in my next life?" [TMZ]
• In an e-mail to ABC News, Brittany Murphy's half-brother Jeff Bertolotti said, "I haven't seen my little sis for eight years or so now due to family issues and Hollywood politics, but never have i lost my heart for that sweet little child... I'm torn up in side beyond belief. It's just not natural for a man of 54 to see his kid sister of 32 leave in such an abrupt manner as this. The loss is just unbearable to us all." [ABC News]
• A clip of Abby Elliott impersonating Brittany Murphy on the December 5 episode of SNL was removed from Hulu last night. [EW]
• Hockey player Mike Fisher confirmed that he and Carrie Underwood are engaged at a press conference before an Ottawa Senators game tonight. "It's true," said Fisher. "We're both obviously excited and very happy." [Ottawa Sun]
• Her rep says: "I'm happy to confirm that Carrie Underwood is engaged to Mike Fisher, and the couple couldn't be happier... No wedding date has been set at this time." [People]
• There's a rumor going around that Jay-Z and Beyonce have changed their legal names to Shawn and Beyonce Knowles-Carter. A source says Beyonce wanted to keep the Knowles name alive because her parents had no boys. [Media Take Out]
• Britney Spears' manager posted a "BS Alert" on her blog listing the 75 most outlandish stories published about Britney last year. He lists a story about Britney dating Indian choreographer Sandip Soparrkar as the most ridiculous, but we think Courtney Love posting on her Facebook page "britneys dad molested her" is more disturbing. [Us]
• The FBI was supposed to release 333 pages of formerly-classified documents about Michael Jackson today, but they've been delayed by a day due to the snow storm. Source say the documents show that in 1993 Johnnie Cochran contacted the FBI and claimed the family of the boy who accused Michael Jackson of child molestation was just trying to extort money from MJ. [TMZ]
• Wave goodbye to Tiger Woods: Sources say he and some friends took off on his yacht from Florida this weekend and they're cruising to the Bahamas. [E!]
• It seems all of Tiger Woods' neighbors knew that he was cheating because he'd take women out to dinner and bring them to his home. "Elin feels that Tiger made a fool of her and that's not something she can forgive," said a source. [Radar Online]
• Sources say the husband of Theresa Rogers, the woman who had the longest affair with Tiger Woods, found out about their affair but made some kind of arrangement so she could keep sleeping with Tiger. [Radar Online]
• Moments after Pete Doherty escaped a prison sentence by admitted to careless and drunken driving in court, he was arrested on suspicon of possessing a controlled drug and taken to the police station across the street from the court house. [The Telegraph]
• Boy George is appealing his probation sentence for imprisoning a male escort because it prevents him from appearing on Celebrity Big Brother. [BBC]
• Are Randy and Evi Quaid on the lam? This morning they posted bail and later they were seen packing some belongings into their car and driving off into the sunset. [Perez Hilton]
• Check out Evi Quaid's mug shot from her arrest on Saturday here: [Radar Online]
• New Zealand TV host Paul Henry, who said Susan Boyle was "starved of oxygen at birth" and "she is in fact retarded," has apologized saying, "I am sorry that some people have taken what I said in a way that I never intended." [AFP]
• Want to party with the cast of Jersey Shore? It's going to cost you. Michael Schweiger of CEG Talent says, "We get the most requests for Mike (aka The Situation) and Pauly D. They're $7,500 per person." [E!]
• One of Bon Jovi's sons was taken to the hospital in New Jersey this morning. Authorities said the incident wasn't serious and he's already been released. [Perez Hilton]
• Taylor Swift is in talks to star in the remake of the 1984 flop Supergirl! The Love Story. [The Wrap]
• Taylor Swift has been named the Associated Press Entertainer of the Year. "I am so honored and so excited," Swift said. "This was so unexpected, and I could not be more grateful." Tina Fey won last year and Stephen Colbert won in 2007. [AP]
• The AP says Michael Jackson's death was the biggest entertainment story of 2009 (obvs.). [AP]
• No surprises here either: Entertainment Weekly named Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag's How To Be Famous the worst book of the year. [EW]
• Jessica Simpson posted this video of herself using an ear candle, which was a Christmas gift from her hair stylist Ken Paves, on her Twitter for some unknown reason. [Buzzfeed]
• Some previously unseen letters Princess Diana wrote in the 1980s have been released. In one letter she tells a friend, "I could not resist opening my present, as a parcel of any shape or form has never been safe with me and I fear that William has also picked up this dreadful habit from his mother, as I find wrapping paper undone in the most extraordinary places!" [Daily Mail]
• Nancy Meyers says Alec Baldwin demanded a butt double for It's Complicated. "He said, 'Mine's beautiful. However, I don't want to do that,'" she reported. [Us]

• Amy Winehouse was in the audience for a performance of Cinderella and, reportedly, heckled the cast. She shouted things like:

"He's fucking behind you" and "Fuck Cinders, Prince Charming, marry me." She also called the ugly stepsisters "bitches." When a manager tried to usher her from the venue, she kicked him between the legs. Allegedly! Police are investigating… [The Sun]

• Foul play is not suspected in Brittany Murphy's death. [People]
• Here, sources say that Brittany Murphy was sick and vomiting before she died and was taking prescription meds for flu-like symptoms. In addition, she had diabetes. [TMZ]
• Brittany Murphy was fired from a horror film called The Caller two weeks ago. In addition, an insider on another horror/thriller, Something Wicked, says she was "barely there" when called on to shoot her scenes and would "go in and out of consciousness in the middle of takes." This source and the crew assumed she was on prescription drugs. But apparently, in 2001, she told a reporter that "even if she wanted to she couldn't take drugs because she'd had a heart condition since she was a little girl." [The Wrap]
• In this piece, Hollywood insiders claim Brittany Murphy was "a mess," had "too many drugs and not enough food" and "was a space cadet." [The Daily Beast]
• Here, a neighbor describes how rescue workers tried to save Brittany's life, although the woman says, "I think she was dead already." [Radar Online]
• The medical staff at the hospital tried to revive Brittany Murphy three times. [Radar Online]
• Leave it to The Sun to keep things classy and tasteful; the headline here is "Brittany 'Killed by Jacko Drugs.'" [The Sun]
• Brittany Murphy's family has released a statement: "The sudden loss of our beloved Brittany is a terrible tragedy. She was our daughter, our wife, our love and a shining star. We ask you to respect our privacy at this time." [ET]
• Madonna and Guy Ritchie are reuniting. For Christmas. A source says: "Madonna is flying in for 24 hours so Guy can spend Christmas Day with the children. Things are amicable between them and the children love Christmas at Ashcombe House in Wiltshire, which Guy has turned into a Santa's grotto." Listen: "Grotto" is for moss-covered sex playpens. Not for Kris Kringle. [Daily Express]
• Madonna is "the most written-about celebrity of the past decade in Britain." [The Sun]
• Tiger Woods' wife Elin Nordegren is allegedly seeking sole custody of their kids and half of his $600 million. [Radar Online, NY Post]
• Tiger Woods' mom: "Hurt, angry and disappointed" with her song. Apparently she likes Elin and — no shock here — adores her grandkids. [NY Post]
• Tiger Woods's yacht, Privacy, has set sail from Florida. A source says it's headed to he Bahamas. Will some alone time on the open seas be good for the golfer? [People]
• Strippers have found that Chris Brown acts like "a perfect gentleman." [Page Six]
• Charles Barkley is hosting SNL in 2010, and this columnist asks, "Could [good friend] Tiger Woods appear with him?" [MSNBC Scoop]
• This entire article is about how Sarah Jessica Parker's dress clung to her after a gust of wind. Eyeroll. [NY Daily News]
• Breaking: Catherine Zeta-Jones has a great rack. [Page Six]
• No surprise: The ratings for Jersey Shore are up. An interesting, voyeuristic anthropological study? Comedy gold? Trainwreck? Doesn't matter. America's in love. [TV BY The Numbers]
• In this column, Jersey Shore's Pauly D. explains how he gets his hair to do what it does: "It takes me 25 minutes to do the whole process and get it right." [NY Daily News]
• Barbara Walters and Frank Langella??!?! Apparently he's been her plus one at a bunch of events. She says: "Frank and I have been friends for many years and will continue to be friends for many years, but it's not a romance." [Page Six]
• "Roman Polanski is finishing the edit of his latest movie Ghost from his house arrest in Switzerland, surrounded by family and bombarded by telephone calls of support." [AP]
• Um, if you, like, me, enjoy handbags, be sure to click here and see Gossip Girl's costume designer, Eric Daman, in the dreamiest closet of your dreamy dreams. [NY Post story, slideshow]
• Tila Tequila has tweeted: "BIG ANNOUNCEMENT: I am going to become a SURROGATE MOTHER for my brother & his Wife!!! That is my xmas present to them. Im pregnant!!!!" This should be interesting. [ONTD via Daily Express]
• One of Jon Bon Jovi's sons was taken to the hospital yesterday, but there are no further details. [TMZ]
• Guys! I could not even read this item about Jude Law and Robert Downey Jr. because the picture accompanying the piece makes it look like they're going to make out and I got excited/distracted. [Gatecrasher]
• Evi Quaid was arrested in Marfa, Texas on Saturday — she and husband Randy did not show up to court appearances after being busted skipping out on a steep hotel bill. [Radar Online]
• Randy Quaid has also been arrested. [Radar Online]
• Did Claudia Schiffer get special treatment when she was on the train that got stuck in the Chunnel? [Daily Express]
• Was PETA postergal Bethenny Frankel wearing fur over the weekend? More importantly: Was she on the subway?!?! [Gatecrasher]
• Hollywood is out of ideas, part CXXIII: Taylor Lautner might star in a remake of Vision Quest. [Daily Express]
• Let's not even talk about the 21 Jump Street movie starring Jonah Hill. [ONTD via Variety]
• The third Jackass movie will be 3D. [ONTD via Coming Soon]
• Rage Against the Machine pissed off Simon Cowell by hijacking the UK charts and landing the Christmas No. 1 spot. (One of his X Factor contestants was on track to score number 1.) [Daily Mail, Gawker]
• In a poll of 1,000 children under 10, Simon Cowell came in first as "the most famous person in the world." The Queen was second and God was third. [Mirror]
• Kate Winslet was "undone," meaning moved, by Crazy Heart, starring Maggie Gyllenhaal and Jeff Bridges. [Page Six]
• In 2010, Mary J. Blige will be a guest judge on American Idol, come out with a line of sunglasses and a fragrance. She says of her photograph on her new album cover: "Look at my shoulders, where I carry everything. Look at the strength of this person who continues to have trials and tribulations like everyone, and who by the grace of God makes it out." [USA Today]
• Did Nancy O'Dell leave Access Hollywood because Billy Bush is a diva and a jerk? [Gatecrasher]
• Wait, what? Def Leppard is developing a cartoon series?!?! [Reuters]
• "I don't want to just be a kind of bouncing board for men to flex their muscles and look brave and courageous and understanding, while I just look bleary-eyed in the background. No, I don't want to do that. You can also do leading roles that are riveting, but they tend to be – well, certainly in my world – they're the lower-budget, more arthouse films, because I'm not on the right list to be asked to do those really great meaty roles that you see Meryl Streep or Cate Blanchett doing." — But dammit, Kristin Scott Thomas, you're amazing! She also says of Botoxed actresses: "I can't bear is seeing [people who look] like photocopies. And there's that strange waxy look that I find disturbing." [Guardian]
• "Some women can buy their own shoes, some women don't want to go to lunch, some women like to cook, but they all need sex therapy. It's the one thing every woman's going to need sooner or later. Except a nun. So this album is not for nuns." — Robin Thicke. [AP]
• "Well, I know I'm not Quasimodo but as far as I'm concerned, you know, I think I'm not aesthetically beautiful. I have a broken nose here. I had a tracheotomy when I was a kid. I had broken capillaries. I always ask my husband, do I look fat in this dress? Can you see that spot on my face?" — Catherine Zeta-Jones. [Daily Express]
• "I always felt connected to her as we shared a very special experience in our lives together. I feel love in my heart for her – and hope she is at peace. This is truly sad." — Alicia Silverstone on Clueless costar Brittany Murphy. [People]

• In the December Elle Sarah Jessica Parker (over?)shares her thoughts on her new twin girls revealing, "I love the smell of diapers; I even like when they're wet and you smell them all warm like a baked good..."

• "I love the smell of Balmex. Love it." As for her decision to hire a surrogate to have the girls, she said, "I knew there would be lots of opinions about, ‘Well, why didn't you adopt? Why didn't you do this? Why didn't you do that?' and the truth of the matter is, it wasn't one or the other for us. We had explored, and continue to explore all options, and this one just happened first. This isn't the period at the end of the sentence." [Just Jared]
• Yesterday ,Lindsay Lohan Tweeted that Michael Lohan used to threatened to kill her mother Dina if she tried to leave him. Today, Michael responded, "That's a lie... I guess Lindsay is on more drugs than I thought to say something like that … No wonder why God is taking her entire career away from her. Because she's forsaken everything He's given her and she's done nothing but misuse all the gifts she's given." [People]
• Lindsay Lohan missed a business meeting today because she was partying into the wee hours of the morning. "This meeting was very important for her career," said a source. "She simply failed to appear and never called to even cancel." [Radar Online]
• Police sources say they searched the Las Vegas home of 19-year-old Rachel Lee and found clothing belonging to Lindsay Lohan and Audrina Patridge, and three personal photos of Paris Hilton. [L.A.T.]
• Justin Timberlake wants his temporary restraining order against Karen McNeil, the woman he says is stalking him, made permanent. Two of his bodyguards filed testimony against her but when the judge said he wanted JT to show up in court on Monday and speak for himself, his lawyer moved to get a different judge. [TMZ]
• Star's cover story this week featured ridiculous stories about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's "secret life of binge drinking, mind games, drugs, lovers, and more!", ostensibly based on Ian Halperin's upcoming book Brangelina Exposed. "I was stunned... I never spoke to [the magazine]," says Halperin. "In fact, I finished writing the book late last night which was hours after the Star story broke!" [Us]
• In "Party In The USA" Miley Cyrus sings about listening to a Jay-Z song, but in the interview at the link she admits, "I picked that song 'cause I needed something to go with my clothing line, I didn't write it... I've never even heard a Jay-Z song." N.Y. Magazine]
• December 14 has been set as the first court date in TLC's breach of contract lawsuit against Jon Gosselin. [Radar Online]
• According to court papers filed by TLC, several of the network's advertisers complained about Jon Gosselin's "erratic, widely publicized behavior." [Radar Online]
• A man named Ronnie Newt who is trying to prove that a 12-year old boy named Prince Michael Malachi Jet Jackson is Michael Jackson's son says the Jackson family is harassing him. He asked for a restraining order against Randy Jackson and Joe Jackson, saying, "I was told to stay out of the M.J. love child story. That some one could get kill [sic] for that kind of money." [TMZ]
• This Is It has only been out for two weeks but it's already passed the $100 million mark at the international box office. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Randy Quaid sent a letter to a judge claiming that he and his wife Evi Quaid never received the hotel bills they're accused of skipping out on. He also mentions that Evi has earned many people's respect, "including Karl Rove, who on a recent visit to Marfa made more than one flirtatious advance toward Evi!" [Radar Online]
• Paula Abdul has reunited with Arsenio Hall, after dating him 20 years ago. "Arsenio reached out to Paula because he thought she needed a friend to talk to, someone she could relate to. Arsenio knows what it's like to leave a hit TV show. One phone call led to another, and the next thing you know, they were making a date," said a source. "This could be the perfect situation for the two of them. Paula and Arsenio know each other inside and out." [Contact Music]
• Carrie Prejean was removed from a conservative "Defenders of the Family" event in New Jersey after word that she made a sex tape got out. [TMZ]
• Usher's divorce from Tameka Raymond was finalized today. [USA Today]
• Joe Francis avoided jail time today when a judge sentenced him to time served,$250,000 restitution and a $10,000 fine for pleading guilty to filing false tax returns. [TMZ]
• Peter Andre and Katie Price saw each other for the first time since their split in May when their son Harvey was taken to the hospital with breathing difficulties. He's OK and has been discharged. [The Mirror]
• "Becoming a parent is the most selfless act, and you need to be at a point in your life where you can give up anything and everything for a child. I don't know if you know how to that when you're in your 20s," says 32-year-old new mom Sarah Michelle Gellar. Her husband, 33-year-old Freddie Prinze Jr., adds, "I'm so happy we didn't have kids in our 20s – I just didn't know a thing. You have so much more patience in your 30s, and I feel like I appreciate this so much more." [People]
• Jemaine Clement says Flight of the Conchords may not return for another season because, "Bret and I are both fathers," Clement told us during an interview to promote his (troubled) new film Gentlemen Broncos. "We know if we take on another season, that means we're not gonna see our family for a year." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Thandie Newton says she "fell madly in love" with her husband Ol Parker in 1997 when she appeared in a movie he wrote. "I'd never experienced that before. Up until then, my relationships had always been more based on people wanting to be with me. When I met Ol, I was dating a really sweet, lovely man and I had to leave him straight away, even though I wasn't even going out with Ol!" she said. "But as soon as I met Ol, it kind of cut off any other blood vessels to anywhere else. We got married about two years later; we've just had our 11th wedding anniversary." [Daily Express]
• In Precious Erica Watson plays a small role as a little girl's abusive mom. When asked if it was hard to scream at the girl she said, "Not at all! The inner bitch in me was finally allowed to come out, and I had a ball! (laughs) But on a serious note, I was a little nervous about being mean to her, but she loved it! She knew that we were just 'pretending' and she made it very easy for me to treat her horribly!" [The Frisky]
• Jon Hamm once said in an interview that he thinks Don Draper and Rachel Menken were soul mates. Maggie Siff, who played Menken, says she agrees: "I think Matt Weiner is an incredibly smart storyteller, and everybody knows from the beginning that this is a guy who's going to go through a lot of women. But I think that the way that our story ended up getting set up within the series is that you feel her absence. She's gone, and then you're like, Well, where did she go? And I think there are a lot of things in that show that come and go, and you feel their echoes. And so in a way I feel like that's probably true between them." [N.Y. Magazine]
• John Slattery says of Roger Sterling, the character he plays on Mad Men, "I think he may've invented a few of his own S.T.D.'s. There has to be some strain of sexual disease out there that he's responsible for. He was patient zero. It's his namesake. His S.T.D. is a Sterling Transmitted Disease." [Vanity Fair]

• Jon Gosselin has been doing some soul searching (or hired a better publicist). Today, he publicly apologized to Hailey Glassman and insisted there's no Nadya Suleman-Jon Gosselin reality show, though his recent behavior "lent credence to such outrageous stories."

• Gosselin responded to Hailey Glassman sobbing about his emotionally abusive "mantrums" on The Insider, saying Hailey, "has paid a significant price to live under such a media microscope. I am grateful for her emotional support and I regret any pain that my actions have caused her as she has selflessly born the pressures I have endured under the media glare. I am committed to making things right with Hailey as well as Kate and especially my children. I ask you to please give me the opportunity to prove myself." [The Insider]
• In Jon Gosselin's second mea culpa of the day, he said he's "troubled to learn that the media has accepted as true the scurrilous rumor that I would appear in a reality television program with Nadya Suleman" but he understands why the rumors are plausible. "I am well aware that my behavior over the past few months has not always reflected my personal and religious values," he says. "I further accept that I have allowed myself to become somewhat severed from my own moral anchor and be carried away by the challenges of fame. It is for this reason that I have endeavored of late to reconnect with my deeper, more spiritual, more altruistic self with regular study sessions and counseling." [E!]
• Nadya Suleman says the reality show, "was a joke. No offense to Jon Gosselin but I'm all about my kids right now. I don't have time for a man in my life. As far as the reality show goes, I can't speak for Jon but as far as I know presently there are no definitive plans for a TV show." [Radar Online]
• TLC is grooming the Hayes family of Table for 12 to replace the Gosselins. The Hayes already have them beat because they have sextuplets and two sets of twins. [N.Y. Post]
• While Madonna was visiting the Malawi orphanage where she adopted her son David, one of the children reportedly told her, "You are our God. Where could we have been without you?" An onlooker said Madonna looked bemused by the comment but "seemed cool with it." [The Sun]
• Department of Justice Investigator Danny Santiago testified today that Anna Nicole Smith's former nanny, Nadine Alexie, told him she saw Howard K. Stern and Dr. Khristine Eroshevich force drugs on Anna Nicole. She would be knocked out for days and wake up with feces and vomit in her bed. [TMZ]
• Taylor Swift was photographed with a guy who had a swastika painted on his shirt as part of the fabric paint shenanigans at Katy Perry's birthday party last weekend. The dude in question, A.J. English, says Swift may not have realized what he had on his shirt when he pulled her in for a photo. He adds that the symbol on his shirt started out as a "X" but got "perverted," and he's not a racist or a Nazi sympathizer. [TMZ]
• Lady Gaga is planning to celebrate her father's successful open-heart surgery by getting a tattoo. "I'm gonna get a tattoo for him this week; I'm gonna get a heart that says 'Dad' in it," she says. "I told him I was gonna get it and he got all teary-eyed and he said, 'Well, you're running out of real estate, so don't get it too big.'" [Contact Music]
• Lady Gaga is including a lock of her hair in every super deluxe box set of The Fame. [The Mirror]
• Italian performance artist Francesco Vezzoli is creating a production called Ballets Russes Italian Style (The Shortest Musical You Will Never See Again) starring Lady Gaga and dancers from the Bolshoi Ballet for a November 14 performance at the Museum of Contemporary Art in L.A. [N.Y.T.]
• Slumdog Millionaire stars Azharuddin Mohammed Ismail and Rubina Ali may lose their monthly stipend and trust fund because they are both have less than a 37% attendance rate at school. [USA Today]
• Another man has been arrested near Miley Cyrus' Georgia movie set. 22-year-old soldier Sean Christian Mathis allegedly came by the set in June and yelled at Miley's stunt double, "Hey, it's Miley Cyrus, I'm going to fucking kill you." [TMZ]
• Literature professor August Coppola, Nicolas Cage's father and Francis Ford Coppola's brother, died on Tuesday of a heart attack. He was 75. [AP]
• Evi Quaid showed up to a town hall meeting in Marfa, Texas last night and allegedly vandalized the building and screamed at one of the clerks. She was upset because she and Randy Quaid are renovating their home but don't have the necessary permits. [Radar Online]
• Randy and Evi Quaid failed to show up for a court date in California again today; extradition papers are now being prepared and the couple will be arrested if they show up in California. [Radar Online]
• A judge ruled today not to punish Picewell Forbes for causing the John Travolta extortion trial to result in a mistrial because he's been, "rightly ridiculed locally and internationally ... It is my opinion that you have suffered enough." [TMZ]
• Several people whose lawsuits against Sacha Baron Cohen and 20th Century Fox over Borat were thrown out have banded together for a single appeal. They say they were tricked into signing a release form for the film and want their case to be heard by a jury. [Daily Express]
• Mary-Kate Olsen's rep insists her boyfriend Nate Lowman didn't propose to her in Paris. "Even though this information continues to be reported as 'fact,' the stories regarding Mary-Kate being engaged are not in any way accurate," says her rep. [People]
• Jessica Simpson says of traveling for The Price of Beauty, "I couldn't have had this journey at a better time in my life, to seek out beauty, to seek out confidence and to seek out the power of a woman... It really is about who I am and what I want to become, and what's going to make the best version of myself." [People]
• "Listen, I know I'm not easy to deal with. I'm controlling, and I want everything orderly, and I need lists. My mind goes a mile a minute. I'm difficult on every single level. I'm aware that I can be annoying." — Sandra Bullock [Parade]
• Possible Lost spoilers: Executive producer Damon Lindelof says, "The decision to kill Juliet was absolutely brutal... [Carlton Cuse and I] have to really love you to give you a finale death." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Robbie Williams has pulled out of the MTV European Music Awards next week due to "scheduling conflicts." [3 am]
• In an interview that airs today on Entertainment Tonight Chaz Bono talks about his transition from being a woman to a man saying, "I always felt male ever since I was a child." [ET]
• In her first interview since being attacked at a book signing Leona Lewis said, "It could have been worse. I'm still alive. It is just something you have to deal with when you have fame and the positives far outweigh the negatives." [The Sun]
• BREAKING: Paris Hilton hates the people who robbed her house. [TMZ]
• America's Next Top Model contestant Brittany says she had no problem with Tyra Banks' "biracial" photo shoot. "I think this is one of the best shoots of the cycle. Fashion, hair, wardrobe, makeup. Everything was incredible," she says. "She was going for something that was unique and fashiony and editorial. And it was at the same time appreciating history and culture... For Hawaii, she brought up the idea of the cane-sugar factory, where tons of people immigrated from all over the place. So it's just more celebrating the biracial lines that came from this...the lineage of Hawaii." [E!]
• Calista Flockhart says she never thought the dancing baby on Ally McBeal was ridiculous. "Honestly, I was quite intrigued by it," she says. "I thought it was smart! Obviously, it was symbolic of Ally's biological clock ticking away, and I thought, what a great way to do that. I loved the fantasy sequences; I loved that we got to see her imagination come to life." [Newsweek]
• Reese Witherspoon says that, for her new Avon fragrance Bloom, "I just wanted a scent memory of my childhood in Tennessee growing up. A lot of it is white flowers and gardenias and things that I grew up in the backyard loving. Things that I smelled on my mother and my grandmother that really inspired a feeling of being back home." [People]
• Sting joked that Barack Obama may be the divine answer to the world's problems. "In many ways, he's sent from God," he said, "because the world's a mess." Someone alert Madonna that the U.S. President has stolen her thunder! [AP]
• Sting wants to stop global warming because it may be making the winter shorter. He says: "I think the winter for the psychology of people who have lived in the northern hemisphere for thousands and thousands of years is incredibly important. We need this psychological time to recharge our batteries, to rethink, to reflect. Without that I think we would probably go crazy. We need the winter, so I worry greatly about global warming. We need to do something radical to stop it." [CNN]
• Mo'Nique says she was able to play an abusive character in Precious because, "I knew Mary Jones. [The family member] was a monster to me as a child. I was excited to play that role, if that makes sense, for that story to be told. So maybe a young lady, or a young man, won't go through life having to carry it around as if you have this great secret." [WSJ]

• Roman Polanski's victim, Samantha Geimer, has filed papers urging a California appeals court to dismiss the criminal case against him. She says she's received nearly 500 media calls since his arrest and just wants people to "leave her alone."

• Various TV shows including Larry King and The Oprah Winfrey Show have asked her for an interview and "The pursuit has caused her to have health-related issues," says the document. "The pursuit has caused her performance at her job to be interfered with and has caused the understandable displeasure of her employer and the real possibility that Samantha could lose her job." [AP]
• On Howard Stern's radio show Rosie O'Donnell said she and Kelli Carpenter split because they have "different living styles," but said they are "working through it. I think we're working through what is best for us. ... It's all okay... Kelli and I have a very strong connection. ... I love her very much." [Entertainment Tonight]
• Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift attended a hockey game together yesterday in L.A. Later they were seen in the lobby of a hotel. "Taylor Swift was all dolled up and looked super pretty," said an eyewitness. "She didn't seem to mind the attention … Taylor Lautner, on the other hand, was hiding under a hoody." [People]
• Kanye West may make a "surprise" cameo on SNL when Taylor Swift hosts in November. [Perez Hilton]
• Around midnight Chris Brown posted a fan-made video montage featuring pictures of himself and Rihanna set to R.Kelly's "The Way We Used To Be" on Twitter along with the message: " IM SORRY YALL. JUST HAD TO POST IT." Minutes later he wrote "FOR THE FELLAS: showing emotion doesn't make u weak... BEING HONEST MAKES U STRONG." [TMZ]
• In his new unauthorized biography Andrew Morton accuses Angelina Jolie of sleeping with her mother Marcheline Bertrand's boyfriend. "Marcheline had a live-in boyfriend whom she was very much in love with, but Ange slept with him when she was 16 and barely out of school," said a source. "When Ange admitted the story to her brother James just a few weeks ago, even he turned on her. She has hardly anyone left in life who likes or trusts her." [The Sun]
• Jon Gosselin has paid back the money he took from his joint bank account with Kate Gosselin. Jon appeared in court today, but Kate just sent her lawyer. [People]
• Kate Gosselin's lawyer said, "We are clearly pleased that the monies taken by Mr. Gosselin have been returned to the marital account, and we look forward to recouping additional monies taken by Mr. Gosselin at the time of the parties' private arbitration hearings." [TMZ]
• In the video at the link Jon Gosselin's lawyer gets a little confused about his nursury rhymes. He says Kate Gosselin is "like the old lady who lived in a shoe" ... but really lives in a glass house. [TMZ]
• During her trip to Malawi Madonna will meet the biological father of her daughter Mercy James. "Madonna wants to meet Mr. Kambewa because she does not want to deny Mercy her background. Madonna wants to assure Mr. Kambewa that Mercy will not be delinked from her roots," says a source. [Daily Express]
• Jessica Simpson is going to India to interview Bollywood star Neha Dhupia for her show Price of Beauty. [News.com.au]
• Earlier this month Joe Jackson claimed that the media would "tear This Is It apart" because it's "mostly body doubles." The film's producers have replied: "This story is pure garbage and there are no body doubles. Audiences will begin to see the film tomorrow and every time they see The King of Pop they will know that every frame is unquestionably Michael as he rehearses and prepares for the London concerts that were to have begun this past summer." [TMZ]
• This Is It is riveting... according to Jackie Jackson. He reports: "Michael is electrifying! We get a glimpse of a true genius at work. His passionate message for healing the world, saving the planet and our children's futures is something he was always striving for in his lifetime." [TMZ]
• LaToya Jackson has revealed that Michael Jackson's kids are in therapy to help them deal with their father's death. She says "Prince just doesn't want to speak about it," Paris, "is doing very well, writes a lot and she wears his shirts every day," and Blanket, "cries – he really does cry. It's so painful for him. No one can bring his daddy back and it hurts so much." What does their therapist have to say about their aunt talking about them with the press? [People]
• Levi Johnston's manager, Tank Jones, says he's "90 percent sure" his Playgirl photo shoot will feature full-frontal nudity. [People]
• Jay-Z will perform his song "Empire State of Mind" with Alicia Keys at Game 1 of the World Series. [AP]
• Jennifer Aniston's rep says she is not filming a weekly show for Oprah Winfrey's OWN network. [Extra]
• Amy Winehouse was supposed to present at the Q Awards, but she missed her cue... twice. Her co-presenter Don Letts handed out an "inspiration" award to The Specials alone. Then Amy wandered out during their acceptance speech and declared them "the most inspirational band of all time." [The Star]
• At the Q Awards in London Lily Allen announced that she's setting up her own record label. "I think things need to change in the music industry and we need to rethink a lot of stuff," she said. [The Star]
• Jordan's maid of honor bridesmaid and (former) friend Michelle Clack says, "She's a monster. She is a nasty, selfish bitch and a shameless liar who needs serious therapy. She is spiralling out of control and it's getting worse." [News Of The World]
• Soccer fans: David Beckham is "keen to play for Milan to maximize his chances of making the England squad for the 2010 World Cup." [BBC]
• Ricky Gervais will host the Golden Globes in January. "Not only is this the biggest Hollywood celebration of the industry, which includes both film and TV, but also an environment where I feel I can get free reign as a host," Gervais said. "I have resisted many other offers like this, but there are just some things you don't turn down." [People]
• At Katy Perry's 25th birthday party Russell Brand had his arm around her dad's shoulder as they sang "Happy Birthday." Then she started a food fight with her cake. "There was cake all over the floor, and the crowd started dancing on top of it to 'Like a Virgin,' a source said." [E!]
• Scarlett Johansson and Liev Schreiber will star in Arthur Miller's A View From the Bridge on Broadway beginning in December. [N.Y. T.]
• Randi and Evi Quaid missed a court date last week over charges that they ran out on a $10,000 hotel bill and though they said they'd be be in court today in California to be arraigned on felony charges they didn't show. They offered to show up in court on Thursday, but the D.A. replied, "I'm proceeding with the extradition [from Texas]. I'm not holding my breath for them." [People, TMZ]
• Jerry O'Connell has sold his memoir Cry, Feed, (Make Love to Wife), Burp, which is about being a stay-at-home dad to he and Rebecca Romijn's twins. [Media Bistro]
• Woody Allen's new film starring Antonio Banderas, Josh Brolin, Anthony Hopkins and Naomi Watts will be called You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger. [Hollywood Reporter]
• "I have songs that I'll never, certainly never tell anyone about," says Lyle Lovett. "Because they're that bad." [Reuters]
• Eva Longoria is going to visit Longoria, Spain, the town her ancestors left in 1603 for the Americas. She says: "The Longoria name comes from Asturias. I'm going to Oviedo [the provincial capital] with my parents in November. They've always wanted to see where our family came from." [AFP]
• When asked if he likes the cover of his new album Soulbook, Rod Stewart shrugged and said, "At least it's not too airbrushed like some of the other ones. It's embarrassing when they do that." [CNN]
• Reese Witherspoon recently said in an interview that at her farmhouse she and Jake Gyllenhaal "have chickens, and we grow cucumbers and tomatoes. I love it. It reminds me of where I grew up in Tennessee." A Tennessee resident says, "Really? There are chickens on Woodmont Boulevard in Green Hills? At your parents' house? Really? Rex guesses that the only chicken she saw when she lived in Nashville was Kentucky Fried or in the salad at the Belle Meade Plantation restaurant. Thanks for playing up the country bumpkin image of Nashville, Reese." [ONTD]

• Today a judge ruled that Jon Gosselin must pay back $180,000 of the money he removed from his shared bank account with Kate Gosselin in violation of an arbitrator's order. As for the rest of the money...

• Kate's lawyer said, "The remaining sum of $55,000, which Ms. Gosselin used for household bills and expenses relating to the children, will be subject to further determination by the arbitrator at a later date." Jon has to pay by October 26 or be held in contempt. Kate has until that date to detail what she's been spending the money on. [TMZ]
• Lindsay Lohan Tweeted: "@samantharonson doesn't respond 2me b/c her family will cut her off if she contacts me…They control the one I love & im incapable of making any sort of difference. I'm in love with her, as she is in love with me….but her loved ones-hate her brilliance & resent her happiness" [Perez Hilton]
• In the video at the link, a Dallas news anchor asks Oprah, "Would you like to take this opportunity to apologize to America for introducing us to Dr. Phil?" She laughs and says, "Aren't you proud of your boy from Texas?" to which the anchor replies, "No." [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson was nominated for five American Music Awards today. His death made him the biggest-selling artist of the year and he was nominated for favorite male artist and favorite album for Number Ones. [Reuters]
• Sources who have heard unreleased Michael Jackson recordings say there are at least two albums worth of material, and some are better than "This Is It." [TMZ]
• Helen Harris-Scott, who once claimed Michael Jackson communicated with her through his music, has filed a creditor's claim for $50 million. She says Michael installed a tracking device in her car, wiretapped her phone and had "organized criminals watching me inside my house in L.A. and reporting to him." [TMZ]
• Robert O'Ryan, Shawn Johnson's alleged stalker, will stand trial for felony stalking, felony commercial burglary and two misdemeanor counts of carrying a loaded firearm in his car. A judge threw out an attempted kidnapping charge because although he had zip ties, duct tape, and a shot gun in his car the judge said there was so much junk in the vehicle that he could not have fit Johnson inside. [TMZ]
• Deputy James Davis, the police officer who arrested Evi Quaid and Randy Quaid, is suing her because she was photographed hanging a hand painted sign accusing him of taking bribes outsider her home. Now another sign has appeared that accuses him of being a "Deputy with Underrated Intelligence." [TMZ]
• NBC has cancelled Southland, but TNT may pick it up. [Hollywood Reporter]
• A Richard Prince exhibition has reopened at the Tate Modern in London after a nude photo of Brooke Shields when she was 10-years-old was removed for possibly violating obscenity laws. Prince was consulted and the picture was replaced with a photo of Shields as an adult. [N.Y. Times]
• The first witness in the preliminary hearing over Anna Nicole Smith's death testified today that she was found with a bottle of the anti-biotic Cipro and a baby bottle full of Pedialyte, which is used to rehydrate children who have diarrhea and vomiting. Anna had the flu. [TMZ]
• The paparazzi caught Maria Shriver talking on a cell phone while driving, which was outlawed by a bill Arnold Schwarzenegger signed last year. [TMZ]
• Paparazzi caught Famke Jannsen with feeding her dog while dining on the patio of a New York restaurant. In New York it is illegal to bring a dog into a restaurant. [TMZ]
• The cover of Q magazine featuring a topless Lily Allen with panthers won a Maggie for the best UK magazine cover of the year. [Guardian]
• Lily Allen is preparing to move in with her new boyfriend Sam Cooper, who is a builder. "They have made enquiries about several terraced properties in Primrose Hill in London," says a source. "Sam's brilliant at planning and design so it makes sense for him to advise on any business ventures. They're so into each other, it's very sweet." [Ok]
• Though they've only been dating for a few weeks Katy Perry wants to introduce Russell Brand to her parents. "Katy is as besotted with Russell as he is with her. However, her parents are extraordinarily strict Christians," says a source. "Katy is sure that, after a bit of getting used to him, they would approve of Russell, but she wants to get that initial meeting out of the way as early as she can." [The Sun]
• Isla Fisher and Sacha Baron Cohen saved a lost dog they saw other drivers swerving around in Los Angeles. Sacha called the owners to set up a meeting and said he'd recognize them because, "I'm very tall and my fiancée is really tiny. You can't miss us." [E!]
• PETA is attacking Paris Hilton for buying a pet mini-pig recently, saying she sets a "wretched example" by treating animals like they're "as disposable as her friends and fiances." [TMZ]
• Karina Smirnoff says the rumors she's hooking up with her Dancing With the Stars partner Aaron Carter are "really funny" because judge Len Goodman keeps accusing them of not being sexy enough on the dance floor. "Let me tell you, if that was the case, the dance would have been very raunchy, as Len wanted it to be," she said. [People]
• The autopsy of Boyzone star Stephen Gately, who was found dead on Saturday, shows he died of natural causes. [USA Today]
• Ethan Hawke is on the new cover of Hobo magazine, sitting on a swing looking scruffy and dejected. [Just Jared]
• Tilda Swinton is trying to prevent Donald Trump from developing a golf course in Scotland. He responded: "Where was Tilda Swinton three years ago when everyone else was petitioning? She's a little late in the game don't you think? Swinton is a part of a tiny little group of people who are hanging by a thread. 93% of the public in Scotland are in favor of the project. I have all of my permits and approvals and we're going to start construction in 3 weeks." [TMZ]
• Heidi Klum says she and Seal won't be having any more kids after their new daughter Lou Sulola. "I think that it's a wonderful experience to be pregnant, definitely, but you have to look at what you can do, and four children is a lot!" she said. "It's a big family. We drive a really big VW bus. Now in September, all three children will be going to school. Try to fit three car seats in the back of the car!" [People]
• T.R. Knight told Ellen DeGeneres, "I want a baby... I don't know if it's going to end up working out, but that would be something I would like." [Us]
• Former Spice Girl Emma Bunton's two-year-old son Beau was taken to the hospital last week because he had a bloody lip. Bunton says, "It's been an emotional week for me as Beau had his first accident, which left both of us in tears. He fell over his scooter and his tooth pierced his bottom lip, so there was blood everywhere." He was sent home the same day. [Daily Express]
• Claire Danes says she likes to walk across the Brooklyn Bridge but has never ventured much further into the borough. "That's terrible. I sound terrible," she said. Her husband Hugh Dancy added, "Basically, you're speaking to the most politely pro-Manhattanite person that you've ever met, right here." [N.Y. Magazine]
• "They've turned the word rock into nothing. It's a meaningless word. "It rocks." "That food rocks." "She's rocking in that outfit." They've taken the word and stripped it of all its menace, of all its dirt, of all its sex." — Joan Jett [Esquire]
• Jane Birkin says Serge Gainsbourg "was scared stiff of all breasts. Which was why, when he met me, he said: 'Wow – you have a body just like the ones I drew in art school.' He didn't like bosoms to be high and pert; he liked them lower down, which was just as well, as I'd had a baby. 'I've always dreamt of a girl who had the top of a boy and the bottom of a girl,' he once told me – Serge did like a bottom." [The Telegraph]
• Sharon Stone says she likes the men of old Hollywood like William Powell and Spencer Tracy because, "They're chivalrous and funny and not too politically correct. They still smack a gal on the ass, which I just think is swell. They wear a suit, they have a hat, they drive a car, they have a job. They stand up when you come in the room, say please and thank you. All those old fashioned things go a long way with me." [Showbiz 411]

• Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel: Photographed holding hands on Monday. A source says they've been vacationing together in Santa Barbara; As for Justin and Rihanna?

They're just "working on a track together." [Page Six]

• Mariah Carey stumbled coming out of a restaurant late at night, but was she drunk? Or just wearing 7-inch Louboutins? [Page Six]
• Harvard kids: Stalked Emma Watson when she came for a football game; thought it was hilarious. [Page Six]
• A whole column of unsolicited uterus updates! Kate Hudson: Not pregnant. Halle Berry: Not pregnant ("I've got to stop with the burgers or something!"). Penelope Cruz: asked if she was pregnant, but "answered no — in a rather baroque, roundabout way." [Gatecrasher]
• This column calls Britney Spears' new track, "3," "maddeningly repetitive." [NY Daily News]
• Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson keep being seen in public together, because ZOMG Twilight is real. [People]
• Amy Winehouse and Blake Fielder-Civil have been writing cutesy notes to each other on Facebook. A sample: "Love you too innit and vairvair proud of youse, know dis lioness civilishous. X" [The Sun]
• Add Penelope Cruz, Harrison Ford, Gael Garcia Bernal and Natalie Portman to the list of people crying "Free Roman Polanski." [Shakesville]
• "John Travolta testified Wednesday that would-be extortionists threatened to go the media with stories implying 'the death of my son was intentional and I was culpable somehow.'" [CNN]
• Kate Gosselin thinks Jon Gosselin's divorce delay is a publicity stunt; I think it has to do with making sure any TLC cash gets split up properly. [MSNBC via Radar Online]
• Wait, what?!?! "Jon Gosselin has put TLC, the cable network behind Jon & Kate Plus 8, on notice to 'cease and desist' any television production of the show and leave his property." [ET]
• Miley Cyrus has a sore throat. Will she be able to do her concert dates? [Mirror]
• Randy and Evi Quaid — who were accused of ditching a $10,000 bill at the San Ysidro Ranch — claim they never got the bill because they moved. They have now paid. [TMZ]
• Kevin Federline: Gaining weight on purpose, so he can get ready for Celebrity Fit Club. A source says: "He thinks that if he goes on the show, loses a ton of weight, and seems really likeable, he'll get more deals afterward." Probably true. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Melissa Ethereridge played on an airplane — 10,000 feet in the air — to help raise money for The Breast Cancer Research Foundation. Looks like he peeps in her audience were wearing pink! [People]
• GLAAD likes Glee. So do I! [NY Daily News]
• Jermaine Jackson is going to judge a new BBC talent show called Move Like Michael Jackson. Too soon? [Reuters]
• Joe Francis might lose his house — over a gambling debt. YAWN. [TMZ]
• Alyssa Milano thinks $3 is too much to pay for a Twitter iPhone app; the "iPhone developer community" is amused, yet angry. [Business Insider]
• In a battle between Jay-Z and Fat Joe, Jigga wins. [Page Six]
• Conan O'Brien is sorta banned from Newark Airport. [NY Daily News]
• Two weeks after giving birth, Ellen Pompeo hit a sneaker party in L.A. and announced: "I feel great." [People]
• Congrats to Will Ferrell and his wife, who are expecting their third child. [People]
• Mindy McCready, who was on Celebrity Rehab with Mackenzie Phillips, says she "absolutely" believes that Phillips had an incestuous relationship with her father and "Nobody has the right to say what they do or don't believe unless they know her." [UPI]
• Kevin Dillon: Seen flirting with women who were not his wife. [Page Six]
• Pete Doherty will be on trial in December after being charged with driving a car erratically over the summer. This story notes: "He has yet to plead to a charge of being over the legal alcohol limit while at the wheel." [Reuters]
• Male model Jamie Burke, Mark Ronson, Milla Jovovich, Simon Le Bon and Marion Cotillard are covering the song "Beds Are Burning"for the Time for Climate Justice campaign. [Page Six]
• "Former INXS and Noiseworks frontman Jon Stevens' condition has "deteriorated" nearly three weeks after emergency heart surgery." [News.com.au]
• Get well soon, Dennis Hopper. [Page Six]
• "It drives me crazy… It's just very hard to get a day's work done and concentrate." — Sarah Jessica Parker, on filming SATC on the streets of NYC with mobs of fans. [NY Daily News]
• "Honestly, I never thought I'd live this long. I always thought that I wouldn't be here at this point. I was thinking, 'Okay, I've got another year of my life left. This has got to be the end of it. Finally, [Nick] was like, "Stop talking like that." — Mariah Carey. [NY Daily News via In Touch]
• "I mean, a zombie movie? Come on. There are good zombie movies -I Am Legend and 28 Days Later- but those are the exceptions. Then I read it and I was absolutely knocked out. I thought it was just so funny and compelling." —Woody Harrelson, on Zombieland. [USA Today]
• "I always sort of cringe when people say, you're that creepy guy. Sinister I can live with, that's fine. But creepy is like someone you wouldn't sit next to at a diner. I'm probably being sensitive about it." — Michael Emerson, aka Lost's Ben Linus. [MSNBC via PopEater]
• "I'm a parent, but I always considered that slightly separate from my work. And, suddenly, I'm reading this script that really explores parenting. I felt very involved with it, because I've got two young girls and I could relate to an awful lot of it. Often, I find family movies a little cute and not very real. This felt honest." — Clive Owen on new film The Boys Are Back. [USA Today]
• TOC: You've also said, "I related to a girl who, against all odds, finds her inner strength and believes she can do what boys do." Have you felt yourself working against the odds in a Hollywood boys' club? "No, I really don't, and I actually find those women-I'm like, get that bitter, ugly, unattractive chip off your shoulder. I'm doing what any guy could be doing, and I don't do it by needing to wear a power suit. Women have made incredible strides; we're in a really balanced or better-balanced culture, and we should be celebrating that…rather than, like, 'Oh, men have all the power.' I'm like, 'Oh, boo-hoo, shut up, make it happen for yourself and get over it.'" — Drew Barrymore. [Time Out Chicago]

• Miley Cyrus will indeed be in Sex And The City 2:

The teen queen will have a scene with Kim Cattrall: Samantha Jones wants to look "hot and young" and winds up on the red carpet with Miley — wearing the same dress. Hilarious? [NY Daily News]

• Rumors that Johnny Depp will be replaced in the next Pirates of The Caribbean movie: "Completely unfounded," says a Disney spokesperson. [Mirror]
• Just yesterday, Jon Gosselin's girlfriend Hailey Glassman was on the Gosselin family website. Today? She's been deleted. [RadarOnline]
• Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom's wedding: A circus. A guest says: There were so many helicopters overhead, you couldn't hear the vows." Ok! magazine made a $250,000 deal for "exclusive" wedding pix, so when paparazzi pictures of the bride popped up on Sunday, the mag had to spend $50,000 on the shots to keep them off the market. As you may know, E! paid for the wedding, after insisting that it be held immediately so it could be on the season premiere of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. [Page Six]
• Ryan Seacrest is thinking about doing a reality show focusing on Khloe and Lamar as newlyweds. It worked out so well for Nick and Jessica! [NY Daily News]
• In other Kardashian news, Kim Kardashian is back together with Reggie Bush. Professional athletes for everyone! [NY Daily News]
• A second suspect in the Lindsay Lohan burglary has turned herself in. [NY Daily News]
• Should Kanye West go to rehab as an apology for his MTV VMA incident? Columnist Courtney Hazlett says "no, no, no." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Speaking of rehab: Amy Winehouse met a "faith healer" named Peter Hippolyte when she was in St. Lucia, and she's planning on flying him to England to help her stay off drugs and booze. Hippolyte says: "We will say prayers together and she will drink bush tea with antioxidants." [Daily Mail]
• Video: Amy Winehouse rapping. Sorta. [The Sun]
• "The timing of Roman Polanski's arrest in Switzerland on Sunday on a 31-year-old rape conviction couldn't have been better for Brett Ratner." Hours before Polanski was arrested, Ratner announced he'll be producing a sequel to Marina Zenovich's 2008 documentary, Roman Polanski: Wanted and Desired. [Page Six]
• Mariah Carey says Precious director Lee Daniels helped her shed some insecurities — he made her arrive to the set without any makeup, and forced her to leave the diva act at home. "That was such a freeing experience for me… By making me look so bad he brought out the ability to never be self-conscious again, and that was a gift that he gave me." On the rumors that Mariah and Nick Cannon are trying to get pregnant, she says: "Well, we enjoy practicing." [AP]
• Jon Hamm and Elisabeth Moss are on the October cover of LA Confidential, and inside Jon says: "The [show] is not meant to be on while you're doing dishes, it's meant to be enjoyed and savored and focused on, and it rewards that attention…" [JustJared]
• At Teen Vogue's 7th annual Young Hollywood party, Kelly Osbourne was overheard telling a friend that she was "shocked" how short the skirts of the young party girls were. [Page Six]
• Randy and Evi Quaid are called "Hollywood's Nightmare Couple" in this extensive piece. Evi allegedly self-medicated with Demerol three times a day, snorting it so it would go right to her brain to cure her migraines. A source says: "She also … believed [Michael] Jackson was murdered along with Heath Ledger, Chris Penn, David Carradine, Natasha Richardson, and other stars who (had been) in movies with Randy." The paranoia that someone was out to get them, and that they weren't safe anywhere, lead to a string of unpaid hotel bills. [The Daily Beast]
• "The enormous sign Evi Quaid made last week — which accused her arresting officer of taking bribes — somehow caught fire this weekend…" [TMZ]
• Emma Watson was "shaken" at the Harvard/Brown football game when security guards had to protect her from gawkers. [Page Six]
• Mel Gibson is asking a judge to remove his 2006 DUI from his record, now that he has completed the terms of his 3-year probation. [TMZ]
• Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York, has announced that a major US film company has bought the rights to her series of children's books. She says: "The films will run as a series… America has been so good to me. I failed in Britain, and when I gave it a go in America I was ready to fail there, too — but they have really embraced me." [Daily Mail]
• Emmy Rossum, who kept her marriage a secret all year, will be officially divorced in about 180 days. Court documents reveal that she married record label exec Justin Siegel in February, and that he wants Emmy to pay his legal expenses for the divorce and give him spousal support. He's all, "That's all I ask… of youuuuuu." [E!]
• Emmy is currently dating Sideshow Bob Adam Duritz. [People]
• American Idol castoff Adam "Glambert" Lambert's CD is available for pre-order on Amazon, and is currently number 2 — ahead of Madonna and the Beatles. [NY Post]
• Darrell Hammond's name is missing from the opening credits of Saturday Night Live, and a source says: "He's interested in pursuing acting more, but he's loyal to Lorne Michaels, and Lorne will always have a place for him on SNL for as long as Darrell is willing to come back." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Barbra Streisand's new CD is nostalgic, though the recording process was not: "For the first time, she worked with jazz artist Diana Krall as producer, and did it Krall's way. She performed with Krall's quartet of musicians first, then added orchestration later, instead of her usual practice of performing with an orchestra at the outset." [AP]
• Malaysia has banned Bruno because of the gay sex scenes. According to this column, "Gay sex, or 'carnal intercourse against the order of nature,' is punishable by up to 20 years in jail and whipping in Malaysia." Their views on homosexuality suck, but as far as the film goes, they're not missing anything. [Mirror]
• Mary-Louise Parker, 45, is dating musician Charlie Mars, 35. [NY Daily News]
• Jaime Pressley and new hubby Simran Singh got into a huge fight on their wedding night, maybe because Jaime had too much to drink. [Radar Online]
• "The Inside Scoop on Starting in TV" is the story of how Lara Spencer got her start. [WSJ]
• Jon Cryer and his wife, Lisa Joyner, have adopted a baby girl. [People]
• 90210 2.0's AnnaLynne McCord actually wants to be on the cover of Cosmo. [Page Six]
• "A former aide to Danielle Steel is facing time in federal prison after admitting she stole hundreds of thousands of dollars from the romance novelist." [AP]
• Al Sharpton and actress LisaRaye: It's on. [TheYBF]
• Police officials now have the hard drive found with Ryan Jenkins when he was discovered dead in a hotel room back in August. There was no suicide note, so cops are hoping the computer will shed light on the murder of Jasmine Fiore. [TMZ]
• Whatshisname does not have an eating disorder. [The Sun]
• "In terms of the stress there's just no comparison. For me, at least, writing a novel is a great pleasure. There is stress but it's a different kind of stress: more mental than physical. In a film you're working nights and 16-hour days. Here I am saying poor me, when I've been paid pretty well for that work, but it's a fact. It doesn't matter how much you're being paid. At my age I just feel I don't want to do that any longer. So, the writing is really a godsend." — Gene Hackman, who has quit acting for writing, He and Daniel Lenihan have written three works of fiction, and their latest, Escape From Andersonville, is a Civil War adventure. [The Daily Beast]
• "I am enrolling in Berklee College in Boston to get my bachelor's degree in music! That's how important education is to me. I plan to work with Rev. Al Sharpton because that's how important stressing the importance of education to children is to me." — Wyclef Jean. [BV Buzz]
• "I wasn't nervous because I'd got my body and mind into shape for it. My aim is to become an iconic sex symbol and the Playboy shoot is the first step. I wanted to be toned and curvaceous with a nice butt–I didn't want to lose weight and look skinny." — Heidi Montag on her Playboy shoot. She also says: "I'm a C cup but I want to upgrade to a DD cup. I have a curvy butt now and bigger boobs will enhance my shape." [Prz]
• "Seriously, I feel exactly the same now turning 50 as I did when I was 40 or 30. I am enjoying myself. I happen to think that I am just extraordinarily lucky. I am doing something that I am passionate about and that I enjoy doing. There are a couple of charities I am involved with that would appreciate a donation. But please, no presents from anyone." — Simon Cowell turns 50 tomorrow and will throw a big party this weekend. [Telegraph]
• "We're having Gore Vidal on. Larry David is booked. Those two are favorites of mine. And the usual suspects: Ann Coulter. Susie [Essman] will be on. Barbara [Walters] might be on the first week because she's the queen. Alec Baldwin- I can't get him on the phone. I saw him recently at a U.N. function. He's the funniest. He trusts me because I'm not out to get him. I'm not. Last time I interviewed him, his daughter was there and they were really close." — Joy Behar on her new HLN show, which starts tonight at 9pm. [USA Today]
• "She speaks like this weird white-person ebonics. She has this weird language. She doesn't technically read. But it's OK; she doesn't have to." — Kathy Griffin on Paris Hilton. [Page Six]
• "Come on over and see me after you finish." — Ellen Barkin to Matt Damon. [Page Six]
• "With ratings falling, this might be the last season of Jon & Kate Plus 8. I'm not sure yet." — Kate Gosselin, on her Facebook page. [NY Post]

• Supposedly, Johnny Depp doesn't want to make another Pirates of the Caribbean because he knows the last two "sucked." Disney will offer him a huge paycheck and if he refuses, he'll be replaced by a younger Zac Efron-type.

• The book On Stranger Tides, upon which the fourth Pirates film will be based, leaves room for a younger character to take the lead, but could someone like Shia LaBeouf or Robert Pattinson really fill the void left by Captain Jack? [MTV]
• Claire Danes and Hugh Dancy got married earlier this month in a small ceremony in France. [Life And Style]
• Jessica Simpson is doing some damage control after the negative reaction to her complaints about having to sleep under a mosquito net in Uganda on Friday. Her rep said, "The accommodations were certainly interesting, but Jessica enjoyed being a part of a totally different culture." And the next day Jess Tweeted on Sunday: "Uganda was truly a beautiful adventure... I will carry the spirit of all the people with me always. God Bless." [People]
• Roman Polanski's lawyer called into Good Morning America today to say that though his client was arrested in Switzerland on Saturday, he's in "very good shape" and he believes it will be possible for Polanski "to obtain his freedom." [TMZ]
• French foreign minister Bernard Kouchner called Roman Polanski's arrest a "bit sinister" and a petition protesting his detention is going around Hollywood. So far Monica Bellucci and Fanny Ardant have signed. Harvey Weinstein said, "We're calling on every film-maker we can to help fix this terrible situation." [BBC]
• Roman Polanski has refused to be extradited from Switzerland to the United States. [AFP]
• Two previous attempts to arrest Roman Polanski when he travelled to countries that have extradition treaties to the U.S. failed because he learned of the plans and cancelled his trips. But he travels to Switzerland frequently and "had no suspicion he'd be entrapped" according to a source. [People]
• TMZ has obtained the 911 call that lead to David Hasselhoff being taken to the hospital last week. In the first, one of his ex-wife Pamela Bach's friends calls 911 to report an incident at Hasselhoff's home, but when the dispatcher calls the house and get his daughter Hayley, she says, "Turn around ... we're completely fine... My mom is trying to cause something ... nothing happened here at all." [TMZ]
• Burglars broke into Gwen Stefani's London mansion to steal her jewelry on Saturday night while she was at a concert in Singapore. They got into a flat Stefani rents to Dame Elizabeth Forgan, head of the Arts Council, but were unable to get into Stefani's flat. [Daily Mail]
• Britney Spears went to the Sugar Factory candy store in Las Vegas this weekend and spent $3,000. She bought three Halloween baskets, two buckets of Swedish Fish, a box of milk chocolate, and 25 of her own Circus Tour lollipops for $25 a piece. [TMZ]
• Pleasant Bridgewater, the Bahamian senator who was charged with extortion over a document regarding medical treatment for Jett Travolta, may have destroyed the document in question, a Refusal of Treatment/Transportation order signed by John Travolta. [People]
• Pamela Anderson is denying that she didn't pay contractors who worked on her home because she's broke, explaining, "I'm financially secure... It is true that I am in a dispute with some of the contractors working on my home. This is because after paying millions of dollars to build the house I continue to get bills from the contractors." [People]
• She adds, "Mistakes may have been made in calculating taxes owed and we are now in the process of ensuring that any taxes owed are paid." [TMZ]
• Kim Kardashian Tweeted after her sister Khloe's wedding: "Tonight was one of the best nights of my life!" [People]
• The day after Khloe's wedding Kim Kardashian supposedly took a flight to New Orleans to see Reggie Bush. "The wedding made her miss him, so she flew to see him," says a source. [E!]
• This week, Lady Gaga will be honored as Billboard's "Rising Star" as the publication's annual Women in Music event. [AP]
• Evi and Randy Quaid's former private investigator Becky Altringer says that Evi frequently used a bad credit card under the name Janet Cross. [Radar Online]
• Altringer adds, "Randy told me that none of his family will see or talk to him because of Evi... He told me that he really misses his mother and his brother Dennis, but that they are all afraid of Evi. I used to see him tear up when he'd talk about them." [Radar Online]
• Mackenzie Phillips says of her family's reaction to her incest allegations, "Don't get me wrong, I understand that my family doesn't want this played out nationally, but the people who are saying that I'm lying have known about it for such a long time. [They're] trying to discredit me in a public way to either protect the brand of The Mamas and the Papas or to protect the memory of [my father.] ... I absolutely loved my father, but he wasn't a good man. He was deeply flawed." [CBS News]
• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt adopted a second puppy. Nine weeks ago they got a maltipoo puppy named Dolly and they says, "We're getting Dolly's brother and naming him Inky the Ninja!" [People]
• In the audiobook of Patrick Swayze's book Time of My Life, which he narrates, he says he felt "anger, bitterness and despair" when he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. [People]
• Ben Lee and Ione Skye welcomed a daughter, Goldie Priya Lee, on Thursday. [People]
• First Republic Bank has put a hold on Frances Bean Cobain's $1.2 million trust fund because there's a dispute over whether Courtney Love or the Laird Norton Tyee Trustee Company has the right to access her account. Love's attorney says the band is just stalling because she and the trustee had agreed to move the money to a different bank and First Republic doesn't want to lose the account. [TMZ]
• Jaime Kennedy is claiming that a now-former assistant is responsible for the reports that he was cheating on Jennifer Love Hewitt. Perez Hilton suggests that Kennedy himself may have called and accused "Miguel" of making the rumors up. [Perez Hilton]
• Fred Durst and wife of two months, Esther Nazarov, have split up. He announced on Twitter: "For those of you inquiring, I will confirm that Esther and I have decided to go our separate ways and we both thank you for your support." He added, "We remain very positive and wish only the best for each other." [Perez Hilton]
• Jude Law says of playing Hamlet on Broadway, "He demands such a reveal of your inner feelings and thoughts that you have to open yourself up to him and see where he takes you." [Style.com]
• Kristin Cavallari says of working on The Hills, "I pretty much do anything they have me do because I don't care... I mean, we're filming a TV show. Let's make it interesting. Let's have a good time with it."
  [L.A. Times]
• Jeremy Piven's RocknRolla co-star Ludacris is clearing up the murcury poisoning rumors once and for all. He says: "A lot of people thought he was making up the mercury poisoning thing. I'm telling you, as his friend trying to look out for him, when he was around me, he definitely OD'd on fish."
  [N.Y. Observer]

• At a concert on Sunday Marilyn Manson blew phlegm from his nose all over the stage (there's video). The next day he wrote on Facebook: "So I have officially been diagnosed, by a real doctor, with THE SWINE FLU..."

• He continued, "I know everyone will suggest that fucking a pig is how this disease was obtained. However, the doctor said, my past choices in women have in 'no way' contributed to me acquiring this mysterious sickness. ... Unfortunately, I am going to survive." [TMZ, UPI]
• The Sun has admitted Lily Allen didn't insult the Beckhams, and paid her $16,000. The paper printed an apology, saying, "We now accept that Lily didn't say these things to the magazine and we apologize to Lily for the upset and embarrassment caused by repeating them." The incorrect quote was taken from a French magazine called SoFoot. [E!]
• Though Lily Allen told fans she has no plans to make another record, her spokesman is reassuring fans that she's not retiring from music. He said: "Lily is not retiring from music. She is still promoting her current album which is why she said she is not thinking about her next record right now." [The Mirror]
• People has seen a videotape of John Travolta's lawyer and the two Bahamian defendants accused of trying to extort money from him. The men asked for money for a document called a Do No Transport form Travolta signed when considering whether to have his son taken to the airport or the nearest hospital. Travolta's lawyer asks, "Where the hell did you get a number of 25 million bucks?" [People]
• After Randy and Evi Quaid were arrested yesterday for skipping out on a hotel bill they sent in a $5,546 check — about $5,000 less than they owe. [TMZ]
• Deputy James Davis, the police officer who arrested Evi Quaid, says she showed up to his office today and screamed at him, accusing him of being "a crooked, corrupt cop" who concocted "a plot against her and her husband." He described it as a "psychotic episode." [TMZ]
• The Quaids have been formally charged with felony burglary, conspiracy and defrauding an innkeeper. The Santa Barbara D.A. said, "They're going to need to come to Santa Barbara and deal with these charges. Any restitution that's been paid will help facilitate a resolution of the criminal case, but that doesn't mean it will automatically go away." [TMZ]
• Last night Angelina Jolieand Brad Pitt went to the dedication of the Jane Pitt Pediatric Cancer Center in his hometown of Springfield, Mo., which was named after his mom and financed by a $1 million donation from Pitt. [Star]
• In a statement read on today's Oprah, Bijou Phillips said she was 13 when she learned that her half-sister Mackenzie Phillips had sex with her father. She is now 29 and says the information was confusing and scary and it was "heartbreaking" that her family still left her alone with her father. [AP]
• For some unknown reason, Vivica A. Fox was asked about Mackenzie Phillips' revelation that she had sex with her father. She said: "The fact that her father is not here to defend himself, I don't like it. I don't think that's fair." Yes, clearly it's Mackenzie who needs to be worried about being fair! [Radar Online]
• Vincent D'Onofrio, Kathryn Erbe and Eric Bogosian will be phased out of Law and Order: Criminal Intent this season and Jeff Goldblum will take over as the lead detective. [Reuters]
• Martha Stewart apologized for making insensitive comments about Jessica Simpson losing her dog on her TV show today. "I said that she should have been watching her dog more closely, but I feel very, very sorry for anybody that loses a pet," said Martha. "Jessica, I hope you find your pet, but if you don't, I'm really sorry that you lost one." [People]
• Blind item: Which "on-screen duo" doesn't get along in real life?" Michael Ausiello writes: he "claims his leading lady is unprofessional and extremely difficult to work with. Even worse, he has accused her of behaving 'inappropriately' at times. He's made it known to TPTB that he doesn't want to be in scenes with her, least of all love scenes. But there's no getting around those anytime soon. 'They told him the love scenes are unavoidable,' says my spy. 'Their characters are supposed to be having a torrid affair.'" [Entertainment Weekly]
• This week's episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8 was the lowest rated ever, drawing in only 1.7 million viewers. Their high was the divorce episode, which had 10.6 million viewers. [Radar Online]
• Elizabeth Hurley's husband, Arun Nayar, was badly burned on his face and right hand while lighting a bonfire at his home. He said, "I had an accident, but I am recovering well now." [The Telegraph]
• Justin Guarini is getting married this weekend to Reina Capodici, with whom he has a four-year-old daughter. His friend and publicist said, "This is the happiest I've ever seen him. He's smiling from ear to ear. I don't know what's bigger – his teeth or his hair." [People]
• Jaime Pressly is marrying Simran Singh on Saturday. They announced their engagement in July. [Radar Online]
• Isabella Rossellini, who starred in the experimental online Green Porno films says, "The web is a double-edged sword," she said, speaking in Italian. "It has a huge potential for distributing content, creating contacts. There are a lot of advantages. The problem is that money is spent on technologies, not on content." [Reuters]
• Gisele Bunchen says she and Tom Brady decided not to find out the sex of their baby. "We will only know when it is born, in December," she said. "I want the emotion of finding out then if it is a boy or a girl." [People]
• Jamie Lee Curtis criticized paparazzi for creating a "hostile environment for celebrities" and rushed past photographers at Variety's Power of Women Luncheon. She explained: "My knees happen to have some bruises on them because I just did a stunt where I was under a sink on my hands and knees with exploding water in my face. I had very bruised knees and I worried they would focus on that and make some bad story about why my knees are bruised!" [The Mirror]
• Hugh Hefner says he wants Megan Fox to pose for Playboy explaining, "Megan is a fox." However his new girlfriends want Kelly Osbourne to pose. "She's losing weight and she's blond now," Crystal Harris says. "She looks good. I want to see what she looks like naked." [E!]

• Gerard Butler is not, repeat, not dating Jennifer Aniston.

"I love her to death," he says. "She's the coolest and she's become a great friend, but there's nothing going on. And if there was, I'd be happy to say it!" Next week's tabloids covers: JEN'S HEARTBREAK! REJECTED BY GERARD! [E!]

• Starbucks barista to Nicole Kidman: "You know who you look like — that lady who used to be married to Tom Cruise. What's her name?" [Page Six]
• Randy and Evi Quaid were arrested yesterday, but they posted bail last night after the Presidio County Sheriff was kind enough to drive them to an ATM. Apparently law enforcement sources believe Randy and Evi have a pattern of staying in pricey hotels and not paying when they leave. [TMZ]
• Jude Law is the biological father of a newborn child, but he has told his one night stand Samantha Burke that he will not see their daughter for three months. He needs to finish Hamlet on Broadway first. [Telegraph, Telegraph]
• Bruce Willis doesn't like Facebook: "It's frightening, I think it's like the fall of Rome. Three years from now, after all the bees are dead..." [Mirror]
• In her book, Mackenzie Phillips claims she had sex with Mick Jagger when she was 18 (he would have been around 35). "I've been waiting for this since you were 10 years old," Jagger allegedly told her. She says: "I'd known Mick since I was a kid, and maybe most people think their parents' friends are old and gross. But this was Mick Jagger. Mick Jagger! He was hot. He had the most perfect ass in history." [NY Post]
• Britney Spears' 50/50 custody split with Kevin Federline will continue, at least through the end of the year. [TMZ]
• Chris Brown has booked his first show since assaulting Rihanna in February: He'll play Power 105.1's Powerhouse '09 concert with Keri Hilson, TheDream and Trey Songz. A source says: "Chris isn't advertiser-safe yet - his image has a long way to go… But for this show, he'll draw a crowd, so the producers of the show are willing to pay." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Jessica Alba's one-year-old daughter Honor is becoming bilingual. "I am a mother who shoves information down her throat, poor thing," Jessica says. "I sing her songs about colors in Spanish and English when I'm cooking. Literally I integrate learning into everything I do. We're into colors because I feel that's something a 15-month-old can sort of identify. So now she kind of points to blue and says 'azul' and I say 'Yes, azul, muy bien!' It's slow going but she's sort of picking it up." [People]
• How is Travis Barker doing after surviving a plane crash and the death of his good buddy DJ AM? Friend Rob Dyrdek says he's doing "better than I would probably think anyone would really expect." [People]
• "Mariah Carey is in a happy place with projects, love life." [USA Today]
• Brody Jenner's girlfriend, Jayde Nicole, is suing Joe Francis, alleging assault and battery. Joe Francis' response: "Jayde Nicole is an absolute and total liar. The only thing that Jayde Nicole is famous for is having a tattoo of the word 'respect' above her vagina." What does that have to do with anything? [TMZ]
• Khloe Kardashian's fiance, Lamar Odom, called off his bachelor party, which was to be hosted by Joe Francis and Khloe's brother Rob. Lamar opted for a private dinner with his teammates (and Joe and Rob) instead, which sounds like a smart move. [TMZ]
• Lamar Odom's bachelor party was supposed to have "stripper poles, midgets, and tons of candy." Because Joe Francis is classy like that. [Page Six]
• Sources says Ok! magazine will pay $300,000 for an exclusive on Khloe Kardashian's wedding. The money will go to Khloe and her mom. [Gatecrasher]
• Holly Madison, Hugh Hefner's former "number one" girlfriend, is getting her own reality show, Planet Holly. Holly says: "It's the perfect excuse for me to be normal in a lighthearted comedy romp. Think Mary Tyler Moore.' Um… MTM did not pose nude or have implants, though, right? [NY Daily News]
• Gossip Girl's Kelly Rutherford has filed court documents alleging that her stressful relationship with her ex husband has affected her ability to produce breast milk for her three-month old daughter. [Extra]
• Kelly Rutherford has been granted a temporary restraining order against her ex-husband, claiming he follows, threatens and scares her, her nanny, and her mother. [NY Daily News]
• Even though Kelis and Nas have been pictured together, their divorce is still on; there will be a hearing November 20. [TMZ]
• Jermaine Jackson's Michael Jackson tribute: "badly organized." [BBC News]
• Anne Heche says that she doesn't plan on marrying the father of her six-month-old child: "I want to stay in love." [E!]
• "Dancing with the Stars goes recession chic by reusing Shawn Johnson's costume for Natalie Coughlin." [NY Daily News]
• Click to see a picture of Emma Thompson is a Morris dancer outfit. [Daily Mail]
• Ricky Gervais explains how he got Philip Seymour Hoffman to do a cameo in his new film The Invention Of Lying: "I didn't know Philip Seymour Hoffman, but I sent him an email saying, 'Dear Philip, please do my new film. There's no money as I spent the entire budget on testicular implants. But don't think of them as my testicles, think of them as our testicles.' He loved it, and it worked." [Telegraph]
• From a great piece on Catherine Deneuve: "When we are talking of her role as a fashion model, and we reach the face, she confirms that she has never had any work done on it, while many of her age have. 'I haven't had the time,' she jokes. Then she adds: 'If you want an explanation, you would have to meet my mother. She is 98. It's genetic.'" [Times Of London]
• Edward Norton will play The Hulk in the Avengers movie. Norton says: "The thing about [Marvel's] universe that's fun is that it all cross-pollinates. Even when I was working on the script [for 'The Incredible Hulk'], I tried to plug in the whole Super-Soldier Serum from Captain America." [MTV News]
• "Olivia Newton-John claims to have seen UFO." [Telegraph]
• Justin Guarini, whose nose job nose is kind of insane, is getting married this weekend in a "spiritual," "intimate" service, which means Kelly Clarkson probably won't be there. [Prz]
• Brigitte Bardot is about to turn 75, and this column "reveals a life lived between bed and bedlam." [Daily Mail]
• Redmond O'Neal has been moved from jail to a an in-patient drug rehab facility. [People]
• Charles Manson follower Susan Atkins, who admitted killing actress Sharon Tate 40 years ago, has died. [NY Post]
• "As ailing showbiz mogul Dick Clark prepares to celebrate his 80th birthday in November, a new documentary threatens to tarnish his image by recounting his controversial beginnings." One word: Payola. [Reuters]
• "Richard Pryor's two children say they were never told their late father set up a trust for them…" [TMZ]
• "I haven't watched Vampire Diaries. And I haven't seen Twilight either." — True Blood's Stephen Moyer. [E!]
• "I think that by understanding Chanel's character and different sources of inspiration, you understand the rest of her life." — Audrey Tautou. [WSJ]
• "It's the first time that I really want to have kids. I've been very fortunate in my career, and my life has been about that for so long that you get bored of it. You're ready for your life to be about other people and other things." — Vince Vaughn, recently engaged... Will this turn into another "poor Jennifer Aniston" story? [People]
• "I wanna eat my potatoes and French fries and sponge cakes. When I play a role like this, I can't have my carbs and it makes me crazy." — Gerard Butler. [E!]
• "It's odd for my kids when they turn up at the theater and see me being a parent in a film. I know they're thinking, 'Who are these kids that are around my dad?' But they seem OK with it. Actually, my girls completely boss me. I have no power in my house whatsoever. I am the geek of my household. I am so low-status in my house, you wouldn't believe it. I'm definitely not treated like a movie star." — Clive Owen, who plays a widower dad in his new film The Boys Are Back. [Parade]
• "I love playing Peggy [Olson]. Finding the balance between playing her, finding new things, and not losing her, and constantly finding enough new stuff to keep her remaining herself…Playing her is an exercise in remaining simple, despite the fact that she is becoming more complicated. [She's] not out to hut anyone, she's just trying to figure out who she is. But it still is agenda-free. She is looking for her place in the world." — Elisabeth Moss, who is on the September cover of Vanice magazine. [JustJared]
• "Hitler was a genius orator. To make that many people turn and change and hate, he had to be a showman and he was." — Michael Jackson, on Rabbi Shmuley Boteach's tapes, which are now a book. [Daily Mail]
• Michael Jackson was asked by Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, "Is there a lot of jealousy in your profession?" "Absolutely," Jackson says, "and 'M' is one of them. Madonna." [Page Six]
• "We're more in love than ever. It's great." — Patricia Arquette, who filed for divorce from husband Thomas Jane earlier this year but is now back with him. [People]
• "Atheism has been on the rise for years now, and the Bible of the atheists is [Darwin's] The Origin of Species. We have a situation in our country where young people are entering college with a belief in God and exiting with that faith being stripped and shredded. What we want to do is have student make an informed, educated decision before they chuck their faith.… I am proud to bring this to people's attention. You see things in the world that are truly distressing and you think, 'What can I do?' Well this is something I can do." — Kirk Cameron. [People]

• Did Amy Winehouse's husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, overdose on heroin in jail? He was reportedly found passed out in his cell and rushed to the prison hospital. [TMZ]
  
• Amy went out in London and "left a pair of boob enhancers, like chicken cutlet things to push up your boobs, and some hair extensions in the toilet." Whoops! And hey, what was she doing in there, anyway, that she needed to ditch her cutlets and hair? [Page Six]
  
• This report claims that Blake traded signed pictures of Amy for drugs. [The Sun]
  
• Post-overdose Blake has been banned from all contact with the outside world. That means no visitors. Amy is going to freak the fuck out. [Perez Hilton]
  
• Diva alert! There's an empty private room with a luxurious brown leather couch in North Shore University Hospital on Long Island, patiently awaiting for Jennifer Lopez to give birth. "No one's even allowed in there until she gets here. It's just sitting there for her," says a source. [Page Six]
  
• After she gives birth, People magazine will probably pay J. Lo and Marc Anthony between $4 million and $6 million for photos of the twins. [Ad Age]

• David and Victoria Beckham renewed their vows — and got matching tattoos of the event's date — nearly two years ago, but kept it a secret until now. [UPI]
• Rihanna caught her father smoking crack when she was nine years old. He's since kicked drugs and joins the singer when she's on tour. [Mirror]
• Blind item! "Which recently divorced fashion editor is rumored to be spending more time in Los Angeles these days? Word is she's taken up with the recently jailed Kiefer Sutherland." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which movie star recently suffered a miscarriage? The heartbroken actress is now talking about adopting." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which celebrity sibling who can't stay out of trouble has a girlfriend-of-record, but also a much-talked about romantic incident involving a same-sex pal in the Hamptons last summer?" [Gatecrasher]
• Naomi Watts teared up at a tribute to Heath Ledger is Sydney, Australia. [News.com.au]
• As reported, 47-year-old Tilda Swinton has a 29-year old boyfriend named Sandro and a 67-year-old partner and baby-daddy named John. But did she steal Sandro from his 26-year-old girlfriend? [Daily Mail]
• Heather Mills' manicurist spills: "I'd sum her up by saying she can be charming but, on the other hand, nuts." [Daily Mail]
• Heather will destroy all the evidence she has accumulated about Paul McCartney's wealth; and all video and audio evidence on their four-year marriage. [Daily Mail]
• Jared Leto attacked a fan with his microphone while crowdsurfing at a show in the UK. [Perez Hilton]
• Kirstie Alley and Jenny Craig: Dunzo. [UPI]
• Britney Spears went out on the town with her father over the weekend. Better than Sam Lutfi! [TMZ]
• The lawyer who claims to represent Britney in an effort to try to move her conservatorship case from L.A. court to federal court may not have a snowball's chance in hell. [USA Today]
• Still, he says, "I see the case as a civil rights case. These are issues of confinement. Very serious confinement. Not allowed to contact her friends. Not allowed to use the phone. Not allowed to come and go as you please. Bodyguards controlling you and so forth." [People]
• Heidi Klum says she'll take Britney in. "She can call me and come live in our house with us for a couple of months. I would help set her straight." [People]
• Madonna's new songs: Uptempo, urban, dancey, clubby; produced by Nate "Danja" Hills (who did Britney's Blackout), Timbaland and Pharrell. [Rolling Stone]
• There's a feud between Evi Quaid, wife of actor Randy, and the Actors Equity Union. Randy is banned from the union; Evi allegedly became apoplectic and kicked a 76-year-old receptionist in the shin. Drama! [Page Six]
• "Two girls I kissed turned out to be gay. I kissed Jodie Foster. She played my girl on 'The Partridge Family,' and look what happened" — Danny Bonaduce [Page Six]
• George (Tailor Made) Weisgerber from I Love New York was slapped with a disorderly conduct summons for flipping the finger to a cop in NYC. Hey, whatever it takes to stay relevant. [Gatecrasher]
• Demi Moore, Ashton Kutcher, Penelope Cruz, Salma Hayek, Sharon Stone and Gwen Stefani: Into Mexican Train Dominoes. Yeah, who knows. [Gatecrasher]
• Us Weekly says the writer who identified herself as a reporter for the magazine and pissed off Scarlett Johansson outside of the Today show was not assigned by them and not representing the mag. Whoops! [Gatecrasher]
• Bill O'Reilly forces some underling to wipe the sweat off the exercise equipment when he's done. The "poor kid" just follows him around the gym. No spin zone, indeed. [Rush & Molloy]