The British Fashion Awards were such an amazing mix of weird and chic and high fashion and train-wreck and Daphne Guinness that you're just going to have to see them for yourselves!

• Retailers are crossing their fingers that you will buy some shit on Friday. Pretty please? Sam's Club is opening at 5a.m. — with complimentary breakfast. Target and J.C. Penney open at 4 a.m., with the latter offering 300+ "doorbusters." [WWD]

• A beige-clad Keira Knightley jumped on a beige Ducati to film a Chanel ad this weekend. [Fashionologie]
• Kim Gordon's Sportmax line retails for $135-$275. But Gordon doesn't shop at Sportmax herself. "I can't really afford their stuff." [WSJ]

Just when the "curvy" debate with regards to female models is heating up, New York magazine reports that display mannequin manufacturer Rootstein has debuted a new item, the "Homme Nouveau." This "new man" has a 27-inch waist.

• Alexa Chung hates: "Bad manners," "When people talk about The Wire beyond season one," and "That I have a far-from-pretty voice. This, coupled with the fact that karaoke is basically my favorite activity, makes for some very sad evenings." [Blackbookmag]

Atten-hut! The Fall/Winter 2010 Burberry Prorsum show today in London was armed and dangerous. On the runway: Military looks sharp enough to slice mess hall meatloaf. In the crowd? Lots of names, sweetie. Names.

• Jourdan Dunn returned to the catwalk at London Fashion Week two months after giving birth. [Vogue UK]
• Alexa Ray Joel is the new face of Prell shampoo, 24 years after her mother, Christie Brinkley, had the same gig. [Daily Express]

• Kim Kardashian isn't just coming to the tents to show her Bebe line — she'll join Felicity Huffman and Estelle, among other celebrities, in a fashion show to raise awareness of heart disease. [WWD]

• Madonna goes all Italian neorealist for spring's Dolce & Gabbana campaign. You'd almost swear these images were by Vittorio de Sica, not Steven Klein. The advertising shots ran as editorial content "previewed" in Italian Vanity Fair. [Swide]

• Model Lara Stone, size 4: "I don't want to be the fat one anymore, so, I have just started doing Pilates every morning, then going to the gym, running, and swimming." [ElleUK]

• No plain yearbook headshot for this year's CFDA nominees: Jason Wu, Marc Jacobs, Alexander Wang, et al posed for Craig McDean while wearing their own creations. [WWD]
• Leggings impresario Lindsay Lohan is rumored to be seeking a position as Ungaro's "creative consultant." Designer Esteban Cortazar is allegedly spitting…

• Naomi Campbell stalked the runway like a thoroughbred in Mumbai for a charity show. Last time Campbell blended fashion and philanthropy, the supermodel raised over $1 million for Hurricane Katrina survivors. [Daily Mail]

Herewith, the cream of the GBU archives - the frocks that made us salivate with envy and bow down with awe!

• "Rumor has it" that Madonna-maybe-estranged-hubby Guy Ritchie is gifting the material 50-year-old with "a specially designed, bespoke diamond necklace from Bulgari worth, £250,000" for her Golden tomorrow. [ElleUK]
• Apparently Diddy's "I Am King" campaign will involve Bond-like shots of him in a dinner jacket hanging…

• Kate Moss's fifth collection for Topshop launches today. It's inspired by "travel." Oh, bite me. [Vogue UK]
  
• Spanx bras — to flatten your back fat, of course — in stores now! [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• You will be so proud of Eva Mendes! She overcame that whole nasty rehab debacle to be chosen as the face of Calvin Klein…

• Who will win the Council of Fashion Designers of America's Womenswear Designer of the Year award, the "Best Picture" of fashion? The nominees are: Marc Jacobs, Francisco Costa of Calvin Klein, and Lazaro Hernandez and Jack McCollough of Proenza Schouler (who tied last year with Oscar de la Renta.) Bets? [WWD, sub…

• Now the face of Versace menswear, Patrick Dempsey has started referring to Donatella Versace as his "Italian mother." [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Model Erin O'Connor musing on the end of another fashion season: "...yes I'm howling, oh how woeful I was when the mini cab rocked up early Sunday morning to collect the regal…

• Clothing line Anchor Blue has signed Heidi Montag to be its new face. Because execs want to appeal to a "slightly older" demographic. No, really. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Would you like to be Erin O'Connor's escort to a show during London Fashion Week? Well lucky for you she's holding a contest with Vogue UK. To win her hand…

Last night in London, the fashion elite and the society set both turned out for the opening of the Burberry-sponsored exhibit Vanity Fair Portraits: 1913-2008 at the National Gallery. And while Lily Allen, shown at left, kept it pretty (I know she does the long floral dress and suit jacket look all the time, but it…

• Designer Vivienne Westwood is switching party allegiances from the (liberal) Labour to the (conservative) Tory, and will even be the keynote speaker at her new political party's Christmas party. Warns Westwood: "I'm going to take the opportunity to put them right on a few things. They're not going to get what they…