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"Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"

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whynotshesaid
07/14/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
I always say that when I get older, I want a full head of long, silvery hair. Women with hair like that look so beautiful and wise.

But I also worry that it's one of those "grass is greener" deals, and that when it really comes time to go gray, I'll be like every other woman in my family and frantically dying my hair to cover up even the tiniest wisps of gray.

How sad that we all fear aging as much as we do.
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krismry
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
Hair dye containing coal tar derivatives used over many years have shown a slight indirect correllation with some patients who suffered certain forms of non-Hodgkins lymphomas, so do read the label if you want fake hair that badly.
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CollegeCamel
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
I am so not the kind of person this article is talking about. In high school, my friend once discovered a very small collection of a few gray strands at the back of my head, under many layers of hair. Completely invisible unless you looked for it.

I made her pull them out for me.
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milominderbinder
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
i can't wait to go gray! i plan to just own it, i've watched my mom try to hide it ever more unsuccessfully over the years and i've been begging her to just let it go gray, she is stunningly beautiful and she would probably even look better.
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mirrorghost
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
i love love love women who have long gray hair. i dont know what it is, but i find it so beautiful. ive been dyeing my hair black for years, but that's because its's blonde, so i have no idea if i have any grays or not.
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Neopatra
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
Oh, thank goodness this topic came up. Now maybe the collective brilliance that is Jezebel can help me solve my dilemma. I started dying my hair over 6 years ago, not because of the grey, but because my natural hair color had darkened from blonde to a nasty ash brown. A close examination of my roots at this point reveals that my natural color is an awesome salt-and-pepper with white streaks at the temples. I'd let my gray grow out, but I have carefully cultivated the length of my hair, and am loath to cut it. Also, I am looking for a job and think it's a bad idea to go on interviews with half-grown-out color. What can I do? I want to give up coloring ($$$$!!!!!), keep my length, and avoid the awkward in-between stage. Please help!
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tiredfairy
07/13/09

@Neopatra: Unfortunately, there's no way to avoid some awkward grow out phase.

But, there may be ways to help ease it. If you're lighter in the front, try getting highlights wherever the hair is lightest so that when you start letting it grow out it won't be such a harsh contrast.

Eventually you'll have to deal with grow out, and the easiest way to deal with it is getting regular hair cuts. Sorry!
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Neopatra
07/14/09

@tiredfairy: Thank you.
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tiredfairy
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
I have streaky white and gray hair. I'm 30. It's been this way since I was about 22.

I once got stopped in a store by a woman who was APPALLED at my gray hair. She grilled me about my stress levels and nutrition. I pointed to my mother, whose hair is much whiter and silvery, and said "genetics". She kept pressing. I walked away.

It's not the only time.

I've also had the opposite. People asking me how I did it, like it's dyed this way. People who have been very complimentary because it is unusual. People who can't believe I'm as old as I say even with it.

Frankly, I don't care. I'm not superior or inferior due to my hair. I dye parts of it pink and purple or blue, because white hair soaks up fake colors like you wouldn't believe. It's fun. Sometimes I put a dark streak in to contrast with the white. I'm lucky, it's a very healthy, soft, non-wiry white. It can be "wild", but it's not coarse.

I mean, it's odd sometimes. I still think of myself as having darker hair. But it's just hair.
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Edited by tiredfairy at 07/13/09 6:18 PM tiredfairy was starred tiredfairy was unstarred

coconanas
07/13/09

@tiredfairy: I'd love to see what your hair colour looks like, it sounds really interesting. Oh and what kind of rude asshole pulls you up and gives you a talking to about your hair?
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gangey
07/14/09

@coconanas: I had it happen too, and I only have a single streak of grey. I think middle aged women who are terrified of aging themselves see younger women who could do something "easy" like dye it and they think they are doing you a favor by telling you that "you would look SOOO much better OMG." When really they are just being an ass and making you feel weird.
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whynotshesaid
07/14/09

@tiredfairy: Your hair sounds cool. And also, people suck. Who are these inconsiderate assholes who feel comfortable criticizing perfect strangers to their faces? I could NEVER imagine doing such a thing.
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PaintedTrollop
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
"Letting yourself go" is a constant meme for women of a certain age. I'm 53, and recently stopped coloring my hair. I dyed my hair red for a long time - and I loved being a redhead. On the other hand, I'm tired of being a slave to hair color and noxious chemicals. So, here I am. I have wonderful white streaks in the front, and the rest is going to progress slowly, apparently. My grandmother favored a light lilac tinted rinse, and my daughter and I swore that when it was our turn, we'd do the same, in homage to Grammy.
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AmericanSplendor
07/13/09

@PaintedTrollop:

My worry is making the transition from fully dyed to fully gray. My family goes gray very early (I'm 21 and have already found gray hairs, gah) so I'll be dyeing just to avoid being a gray-haired 25 year old. When is the best time to transition? Do you go in shifts? Just let it all go at once?
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Slumdog_Mamabear
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
My little brother went salt and pepper at eight years old. He has never dyed it, and I have always loved the way that it looks.
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queenieinmanhattan
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
I'm 29, and I've been going gray (with increasing rapidity) since college. I started dyeing the summer before I turned 26. I'm now about half gray, I'd say. I do still dye it, and I don't have any plans to change anytime soon.

Yes, the grays that are coming in are a nice, silver color, and they're not wiry (I've always been lucky in the hair department), but I'm just not ready. I like my hair dark; I suppose eventually my gray hair will be as close to blonde as I'll ever get. But, for now, I'm going to keep dyeing.

BTW, I live in Manhattan and only spend about $80 every six weeks on my hair color. Holly at Fringe on Broome Street rocks my world.

/shameless plug for my lovely stylist
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Edited by queenieinmanhattan at 07/13/09 5:39 PM queenieinmanhattan was starred

boss_lady
07/13/09

@queenieinmanhattan: Only spend $80 every six weeks?! Holy shit.
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queenieinmanhattan
07/14/09

@boss_lady: To be fair, that doesn't include tips!
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starfishtat is knocked up with baby boyfishtat
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
I'm pregnant and haven't been dyeing my hair. Today I got a cut that officially cut off all remaining dyed ends, leaving me totally salt-and-pepper at age 32. I do feel kind of distinguished, except I have a baby face so I feel the overall effect is a little odd. As soon as I'm able, I will go back to my L'Oreal medium brown. I hope I'm like my maternal grandma and dyeing my hair copper penny red into my 70s.
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sassyredhead
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
My auburn hair is going grey at the temples. At first I fought it with dye but I missed my natural color. So I quit with the dye and just let my hair go. It's long, auburn and grey at the temples. I LOVE it. But I keep hoping for a Bonnie Raitt streak!
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meritxell: an erotic life
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
Oh well sure, if you're Emmylou Harris you can do whatever the hell you want.
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Flackette Goes Retro
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
Is it possible to have your hair dyed/bleached gray? I'm just pondering whether, if I go only half gray, I could just bleach the rest of it out to match.
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Flackette Goes Retro
07/13/09

In reply to "Aren't You Afraid You'll Look Like The Picture Of Dorian Gray, Ancient Overnight?"
I really hope my gray either comes in as a bold streak in front a la Susan Sontag or Stacy London...or that it just all goes snow white. I love seeing older women with pure white or silver hair that they leave longish.
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