Label Closures

Christian Lacroix's namesake house teetered on the brink of collapse for the better part of this year. After filing for bankruptcy in Paris this May, owners the Falic Group announced a "restructuring" plan that would see the couture house shuttered, and the Lacroix name live on only in ready-to-wear and accessories licenses. After it became known that the house of Lacroix had never turned a profit in 22 years of operation, Christian Lacroix told the press he was "too angry to cry," and that he had been working without pay for over a year.

A frenzied campaign to save the business ensued. One couture client made an offer to buy; but during the bankruptcy process, suitors like France's Bernard Krief Consulting and Italy's Borletti Group dropped out. A relative of the Sheikh of Ajman in the United Arab Emirates made a serious offer, and seemed to speak seriously of Christian Lacroix private jets and Christian Lacroix yachts and Christian Lacroix lifestyle products; for a while, it seemed all would end well, and a fantastic couture collection was shown in July despite the cash-strapped state of affairs. However, the sheikh could not provide financial assurances to the bankruptcy court, and on December 1, Falic Group's own worst-case-scenario plans were put into place. At least 100 people lost their jobs. Christian Lacroix lost the rights to his own name, and started designing uniforms for French railway workers.

Luella, the critically acclaimed and very popular British label founded in 1999 by Luella Bartley, closed less than 12 months after being named Designer of the Year at the British Fashion Awards. The distributor withdrew its backing after the Italian company that produced Luella clothing went bankrupt. Bartley said at the time that she hopes to revive the label, when the credit crunch eases.

More avant-gard designers also have not fared well this year, as perhaps might be expected. Yohji Yamamoto announced it had filed for bankruptcy protection, with debts of around $68 million, in Japan this October. (It is continuing its operations while in bankruptcy.) Belgian designer Véronique Branquinho was forced to shutter her 12-year-old line in May. New York-based Phi, founded by billionaire's wife Susan Dell and designed by Andreas Melbostad, announced it would close up shop just this week.

Photo: A model in a 2004 Véronique Branquinho show in Paris.

Jennifer Lopez has had bad luck with her clothing lines. The star founded JLO clothing in 2007, and closed it two years later. Replacement label Justweet lasted two seasons. This June, her latest effort, Sweetface, also bit the dust. Good thing she's still raking in the dough from her perfumes.

You're Fired

After rumors swirled for months, Olivier Theyskens was finally fired from Nina Ricci. His last collection included towering heel-less Gothic boots, which later turned up in an evening ensemble worn by none other than Daphne Guinness. Peter Copping was his replacement. Anna Wintour, who allegedly gasped, "How could you do this to me?" when told the news, was so upset by the whole episode that she wrote a letter from the editor about it:

Olivier Theyskens's recent departure from Nina Ricci suggests to me that the vital role of artistic talent has been obscured in the current economic climate. My staff and I were shocked to learn that Theyskens's contract would not be renewed; and I am very concerned that the business of fashion is undervaluing the most important asset our industry requires: creative visionaries. There's a reason we continue to see Theyskens's influence everywhere, from catwalks to the mall. He'll be back, but fashion must hold its nerve. This is the mission that we at Vogue happily shoulder.

Despite this ringing endorsement, by the end of this year, all we've heard of the gifted Belgian is that he's writing a book and "discussing" a "retail concept" with Tory Burch's husband.

The whole situation at the house of Ungaro this year is just Kafkaesque in its web of intricate reversals of fortune and surprise non-sequiturs. After many strenuous denials that any such move might even be considered, might even be on the table, C.E.O. Mounir Moufarrige summarily fired young Colombian designer Esteban Cortazar for failing to generate sales and buzz for the esteemed, though somewhat dusty, fashion house — and, we later learned, for refusing to work with Lindsay Lohan.

New designer Estrella Archs was brought on board — with La Lohan as her "artistic adviser" sidekick. ("It could work," said Moufarrige.) Their collection of very short, very tight, and very embellished dresses was widely panned by critics and the line was dropped by most of its U.S. distributors; Lohan later distanced herself from the decision to style the show models with heart-shaped sparkly pasties over their nipples. Then the Times of London visited her and found a disturbing scene:

The room looks like the aftermath of one of those home-alone teen parties advertised on Facebook that then gets horribly out of hand. Chaos rules. Designer clothes are strewn everywhere; most of them from a sweep of the Emanuel Ungaro boutique that Lohan made upon her arrival in Paris, walking away with an estimated £90,000 worth of free clothes. Shoes, make-up, jewellery, even a stray lampshade obscure the hotel carpet. Her passport is in here somewhere. She's been looking for it for days.

Even Ungaro himself spoke out to attack Archs and Lohan's efforts; Moufarrige denied the disastrous reception had caused any tensions, and said Lohan would stay. Then he himself abruptly quit. Stay tuned for what happens next!

That Old-Time Revival Feeling

Halston was revived. Again. This time designer Marios Schwab was chosen to helm it, and former designer Marco Zanini and stylist Rachel Zoe were ditched.

Halston book published by Phaidon


Former Valentino chief executive Matteo Marzotto and Marni chief executive Gianni Castiglioni bought the rights to the house of Vionnet in February. The clothes, when they came, were perhaps the biggest disappointment of the year. Hint to designers: There is so much you can do with Vionnet! The real Vionnet frikking invented cutting on the bias, okay? Have the temerity to at least try something daring.

Bill Blass was one of the recession's earliest casualties. The talented creative director, Peter Som, and all the other employees were fired unceremoniously just before Christmas last year; the bankrupt label was later sold, for a bargain basement price of $10 million. (In January of this year, just before his planned show at New York Fashion Week, Peter Som lost the financial backing for his own label, too.) Just this month, the new owners, Peacock Holdings, announced Jeffrey Monteiro would be taking over the designing reins. We'll see his first collection — the Times called Monteiro's clothes "nothing startling" — next winter.

Photo of a model wearing Peter Som's Fall 2008 collection for Bill Blass, the bankrupt company's most recent.


Biba. Again.

Beyond Biba documentary poster via FashionTribes


You're Hired!

Jil Sander has the unusual distinction of having been fired from her namesake label by its new owners not once, but twice. After being told her services were no longer required by Prada group owner Patrizio Bertelli for the second time, in 2004, the German designer began a long period of fashion exile. (Perhaps she had a non-compete clause to abide by.) This year, she was spotted at an industry textiles fair scouting for fabrics — and tongues started wagging. A collaboration with Uniqlo was the surprise result, and Sander's minimalist eye is now employed as the Japanese fast-fashion chain's creative director. Her second +J collection launches in the new year.

Clothing Lines Of The Stars

In 2009, everyone who was anyone got a clothing line. (Or that potentially even more remunerative consolation prize, a namesake perfume.) In the stormy waters of a recession, perhaps it's no surprise that plenty of megabrands would seek the safe harbor of a celebrity and her or his contractually obligated promotional heft.

Not one month after finally shuttering Christian Lacroix, the Falic Group announced the launch of an Eva Longoria perfume. Despite the fact that Longoria is allergic to perfume. Miley & Max Azria did a clothing line for Wal-Mart. Toby Keith sold plaid shirts; he had that much in common with the Kings of Leon. Kevin Federline announced a children's line. Mischa Barton said, of her headband line, "People want to see that you can deliver and do, like, a good job."

Richie Rich rebounded from the 2008 closure of Heatherette with an "eco-friendly" swimwear line he created with Pamela Anderson. (I actually saw the launch of this live, in New Zealand. Richie Rich rollerskated, and the runway show concluded with Anderson, clad only in a scarf, accidentally flashing the audience during her bow.) Brad and Angelina did a serpentine collection for the jewelers Asprey. It started at $525, for a baby spoon.


Whitney Port tried to get Bergdorf Goodman to buy her clothing line in the finale of The City. The Olsen twins, after a couple years hitting the top of the market with The Row and Elizabeth and James, returned to their mass tween roots with a JC Penney's collection called Olsenboye. Emma Watson said the idea of a perfume named after her made her want to vomit, but did an ethical clothing collection with People Tree. (Mischa's other line, Tree People, sadly remains hotly anticipated, at least by me.) Katie Holmes released weird jumpsuits with stylist Jeanne Yang under the label Holmes & Yang.

And I leave you with news of the strangest star collaboration of all 2009: the announcement, in June, that John Malkovich would show a line called Technobohemian at Milan's men's wear week. We may not be John Malkovich, but we can dress like him.

What will 2010 bring? This was the year of huge falls in sales and constant readjustments; 2010's shocks, coming after this raft of closures and downsizings and layoffs and consecutive quarters of declining year-on-year results will, hopefully, seem and be modest. Nobody in the fashion industry is out of the woods yet, but perhaps it's not naïve to hope that the rate of attrition should at least slow down.

The rate of stupid celebrity fashion collab debuts, however, is a trend I expect to remain strong. At least Lindsay Lohan's second collection for Ungaro should be worth watching.

• Wait wait wait wait. Did Lindsay Lohan spend the night at Jason Segel's house?

Apparently he came outside and told nosy paparazzi that she was not inside. An hour later, she emerged. [Daily Mail]

• The photographer who shot Lindsay Lohan in a ménage-à-trois situation for Muse magazine, Yu Tsai, says: "When you see her nipple, it just happened in the moment. She was playing the role of Kate Moss — you're at a party and you are with a guy you really love and another girl. She is stunning and radiates in the pictures. Lindsay is incredibly focused where it comes to her career and fashion is her passion. It's raw, it's exposed, this is her at her best. She told me: 'I want to make this iconic.'" So; the nipple shot was in the moment, huh? What about the bare-assed shot? [Page Six]
• Madonna could possibly adopt again. "Never say never," she told a TV news reporter. [Daily Express]
• Is Britney's dad's conservatorship coming to an end? Jamie Spears actually has two: one over Britney as a person; another over her business affairs. The business conservatorship will likely continue, but Britney may get some freedom back. [TMZ]
• "Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman, the American actors, have made it into Who's Who 2010, adding a 'touch of Hollywood glamour' to the list of new entrants." [Telegraph]
• Diane Sawyer has announced that this is her last week on Good Morning America. She will take over the World News anchor chair for Charles Gibson, who retires December 18. [Good Morning America]
• Christopher Cuomo has resigned from ABC, where he was the is co-anchor of Good Morning America and a regular contributor to ABC Evening News. Is it because people are saying George Stephanopolous will take over for Diane Sawyer? [Radar Online]
• mediabistro.com's TV Newser column declares: "Reports of Chris Cuomo's Resignation Untrue." [TV Newser]
• Alexa Ray Joel is out of the hospital. [Showbiz 411]
• Sources claim that Alexa Ray Joel took pills after fighting with an ex-boyfriend. [Extra, People]
• Alexa Ray Joel's ex-boyfriend, Johnny Riot, says: "I don't know how she's doing." [NY Daily News]
• Drew Barrymore and Justin Long are heating up again, and you know, I hope those crazy kids make it work. Adorable. [Gatecrasher]
• Over the weekend, Jake Gyllenhaal said: "Obviously I exist in my girlfriend's world and my sister's world in a different way, but [being around their kids has] opened my heart and I feel much more grown up and want to be grown up as a result of it." Does using the word "girlfriend" mean that he and Reese have not broken up? [Gatecrasher]
• Tiger Woods is a regular at two bars in Orlando, FL — people who work at the Blue Martini say that Tiger is "really friendly" with the waitresses and at a bar called 23, the private lounge is called the Tiger Room — where Tiger's tab is around $1,500 a night. [TMZ]
• Tiger Woods' fourth alleged mistress, Jamie Jungers, is a former Trashy Lingerie "Trashy Girl," as you can see in the pictures at the link. [E!, E!]
• This post claims that Tiger Woods made the decision to pay off Rachel Uchitel after a "secret phone call" in which she made it clear that was not the one who leaked the story of their affair. And: "Tiger felt it was important to silence Uchitel more than any other woman because his relationship with her was current and intense." [Radar Online]
• More women may come forward to say they've been involved with Tiger Woods. An anonymous Las Vegas nightclub owner says: "He wasn't one to send away someone who was interested. There was a revolving door of women with Tiger. I can think of half a dozen off the top of my head." [MSNBC Scoop]
• One alleged mistress says that Tiger Woods told her his marriage was a sham and "only for publicity." [NY Daily News]
• Tiger Woods' best friend, Byron Bell — the one who bought tickets for Rachel Uchitel to join Tiger in Australia — is getting married next week. Tiger is the best man. [TMZ]
• Wait, what? "Tiger Woods Alienates Black Community With White Lovers." You mean golf didn't do it? One blogger says: "If Tiger Woods had cheated on his gorgeous white wife with black women, the golfing great's accident would have been barely a blip in the blogosphere." [NY Daily News]
• Hey, look who's on the January cover of Golf Digest? Tiger Woods. And Barack Obama. [The Life Files, WSJ]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Amy Adams is pregnant. She and fiancé Darren Legallo have yet to set a wedding date. [NY Daily News]
• Clothingus strippis! The new Harry Potter flick will feature a "very sexy" love scene in which Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson are NAKED. Doubt that we'll see Harry's wand, though. It ain't Equus. [Telegraph]
• Susan Boyle is still at the top of the album charts in the UK. [Mirror]
• Matt Damon thinks a fourth Jason Bourne movie will happen "someday." He adds: "It's gotta happen - we've just got to get a script, and we don't have one." The thing is, he wants to do it with director Paul Greengrass, who recently said he wasn't interested in returning to the franchise. "I wouldn't do it with anybody else." [MTV News]
• Rihanna high-fived a young woman wearing the same outfit at her album launch party. [Gatecrasher]
• Shakira will speak at the Oxford Union debating society in front of Oxford University students. [The Star]
• Helen Mirren keeps her Oscar, SAG Awards, BAFTAs, Golden Globes and Emmys in her attic. At the Women in Film and TV Awards – where she won a Lifetime Achievement award — she was asked how a Lifetime Achievement prize made her feel. She said: "Old." [Telegraph]
• A Mexican governor plans to empty a prison in Veracruz in January so that Mel Gibson can film a movie there. [AP]
• "Harvard Medical School professor contends U.S. talk show host Nancy Grace is partially to blame for the suicide of a mother of a missing boy three years ago." [UPI]
• I didn't read this item about how Hulk Hogan wants his antique toilet seat back from his ex-wife because I don't want to know. [TMZ]
• Hotel Gramercy Park premieres tonight on the Sundance Channel, and luminaries such as Debbie Harry, Julian Schnabel, Karl Lagerfeld, Ben Stiller, Winona Ryder, Russell Simmons and Kanye West make appearances in the film. [Page Six]
• John McEnroe and rocker wife Patty Smyth: Spotted smoking a joint at an art exhibit. [Page Six]
• "I've tried, but I get too crazy with that guitar arm and the things coming toward you… I think the game is great… I think the graphics are great."— Ringo Starr has never played Beatles: Rock Band. [Mirror]
• "I didn't really have that many friends at school. Kids would just heckle me: 'Oh, go sing that country beep.' It just dawned on me that I had to love being different or else I was going to end up being dark and angry and frustrated by school. Sometimes I felt like I was some sort of spy because I would go to school during the day, and then, after school, I had this life that was completely different. I definitely was more nervous walking into my first day of freshman year in high school than I was walking up to record labels and handing them my CD." — Taylor Swift. [NY Times]
• "I felt like that was fun. I would do it exactly the same way. You know, I am who I am." — Adam Lambert wouldn't change a thing about his AMA performance. [Gatecrasher]
• "We definitely got bigger than we wanted to be. You feel like you've done something wrong. That woman in mom jeans who'd never let me date her daughter? She likes my music. That's fucking not cool. You almost start doing damage control: When people ask you to do stuff, you're like, ‘No, because I can already tell this record is going to get to a level where people will fucking hate us.'" — Caleb Followill of Kings Of Leon. [Gatecrasher via Spin Magazine]
• "I hid out for a while, but that just drove me crazy. I got cabin fever. I was ready to make music again. It was a hard time, but I found peace in the studio." — Rihanna, on the making of her new album, Rated R. [USA Today]
• "The bottom line is, I really don't know how to relax to the degree that I could just stop. So when something comes along and is presented to me, and I think, 'Gee, I could have some fun doing that,' or 'I think I could bring something to that,' I'll do it."— Angela Lansbury, who is on Broadway in A Little Night Music with Catherine Zeta-Jones. [CBS News]
• Where do you live? "The May Fair hotel." But you must have a home somewhere? "My home is onstage." Where do you keep your things? "I have storage." Not even an apartment? "No. I don't care about those things. I tell my fans this little poem I wrote: For every minute of the day, The truth is that I'm dead, Until I'm here onstage with you -Then I'm alive instead." — from an interview with Lady Gaga. [Times Of London]
• "I'm not trying to be the girlfriend. I'm just kind of game. Often the role they send me is a man's role, written with a man in mind. But character is character; it's not about gender. Writers write these male stereotypes, and it makes it ten times more interesting if a woman says the lines." — Sigourney Weaver on the kind of roles she gets or looks for. Also, she says she once went to the White House, during the Reagan administration, when an 11-year-old Saudi Arabian prince and Ghostbusters fan had requested her presence at a dinner… he was disappointed that she didn't turn up as Zuul. [New York Mag]
• "He hissed at me yesterday. I tried to explain to him but he doesn't understand concepts such as international travel and work. He certainly doesn't understand the concept of a bikini. I am getting him a pet passport which means he can travel around as much as he likes. Unfortunately, they don't do photos. I was really looking forward to that." — Russell Brand on his cat, Morrissey. [Mirror]
• "I started auditioning here and I had the accent, the body and the attitude for the Latin woman, but they don't associate 'blond' with us. I went for a screen test, and they asked me to come with dark hair. I thought it looked better because I have darker eyebrows. So now they believe me that I'm Latin. [Laughs] I always joke that if they throw me in a chlorine pool, all my Latin is going away — my hair and my self-tanner!" — Sofia Vergara, on her role on Modern Family. She also says: "When I came to L.A., people started telling me I had to lose some weight. No one has ever told me in my life that I'm fat. Or that my breasts were too big! When I told my mother that my reps want me to get a reduction, she went crazy. 'God is going to punish you if you cut your [breasts].' …Mine are natural, so they go here and they go there and there's no dress that picks them up! When they told me to lose weight, I was like, are they playing a joke on me? I've always been known for my body! . . . . The thing is I did lose a little weight because I understand that standing next to the stick figures, I don't look as good in pictures. My friend says that the other actresses look better than me on TV because they're skinny. And I'm like, 'Yeah, but I look better naked!'" [LA Times]

• Remember when Nicole Richie was on The Simple Life? She's planning on returning to primetime TV — this time in a scripted comedy.

Nicole is producing and starring as "a professional woman with complicated family relationships" who is "struggling to figure out what role she'll take as her life and her family evolve." She came up with the idea for the show, and Daisy Gardner (Californication) will be writing the half-hour sitcom for ABC. There's no title yet, so maybe we can brainstorm one? Is Family Puts The Fun In Dysfunctional too long?!?! [Variety]

• Jennifer Aniston really loves her yoga instructor, Mandy Ingber. Jen has filmed a personal introduction for Mandy's new DVD, in which she declares, "Mandy brought yoga into my life. This workout will change your body and your mind." Jen works out with Mandy up to five times a week, and even takes her on vacation with her. What have you done for your yoga instructor lately? [Page Six]
• Jake Gyllenhaal's assistant was seeing taking luggage from Reese Witherspoon's house to Jake's house. Are they broken up? Does he have sleepover bags? Is he going on a trip? What does it mean?!?!?! [MSNBC]
• Breaking: Amy Winehouse was sober at her father's birthday party. [The Sun]
• BREAKING! Lindsay Lohan was also spotted sober, while out at a night club. End times? [Page Six]
• "Sources" say the news about Tiger Woods is not surprising: "He's a pro athlete. He's been in a lot of situations with women that would not look good… Most athletes of his stature fall under the same category, it doesn't mean he doesn't love his family." Apparently Tiger was often seen "in the company of women in public places" and "whether he crossed lines - that's not something anyone talks about openly, but I can tell you there are times things look that way." As always: grain of salt. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Roman Polanski will not be released on bail before Friday, according to Swiss authorities. [AFP]
• Ever the nonconformist, Cate Blanchett spent Cyber Monday shopping the streets of Manhattan. [Gatecrasher]
• In LA, George Clooney walked the red carpet at the premiere of his film Up In The Air with his girlfriend, Elisabetta Canalis, and his mom, Nina. [Daily Mail]
• Elisabeth Hasselbeck has been sued AGAIN over her book, The G Free Diet, by the same woman who sued her the first time. Susan Hassett claims Hasselbeck's book is a rip-off of her own work, Living with Celiac Disease. [TMZ]
• Emma Watson: Spotted vacationing in Jamaica with Brit cutie Jay Barrymore, mere days after she attended a hockey game with Spanish rocker Rafael Cebrian. Hermione plays the field! [Page Six]
• Charlize Theron will be the host of a 90-minute live show promoting — and drawing players for — next year's football Wold Cup in South Africa. Only two hundred million people in 200 countries will be watching. No pressure. [Reuters]
• Rihanna was incredibly upset when a man punched Leona Lewis in the face at an event a few weeks ago. I got so mad, like it was me. I couldn't believe it happened to her, of all people," Rihanna says. "It's so disappointing when people behave like that. Why? She's so sweet. She is just a beautiful, beautiful spirit. You don't want any bad things to happen to her." [Daily Express]
• Boys kissing boys and boys in boys' crotches are very much a no-no! ABC is trying to find a way to avoid a repeat of a performance like Adam Lambert's at the American Music Awards: "We certainly don't want to suppress artistry at any level, but we also have to be cognizant of who our audience is," Anne Sweeney, president of Disney/ABC Television Group, says. [NY Post]
• Richard Gere is being called a "tree-killer." [Page Six]
• Sherri Shepherd bribes her son with White Castle. [Gatecrasher]
• In a very graphic video at the link, bounce's from Jay-Z's 40/40 Club in Atlantic City punch and beat two "ejected patrons." The bouncers may face criminal charges. [NY Daily News]
• The gorgeous and talented exiled Iranian actress Shohreh Aghdashloo — whom you may have seen in House Of Sand And Fog — is maybe about to ink a deal for her memoir. And this column claims she is the "dark-horse Oscar contender" for her performance in The Stoning of Soraya M, a film we have been keeping tabs on. [Page Six]
• The next Harry Potter movie will mostly take place away from Hogwarts, and Rupert Grint says: "Harry, Ron and Hermione are just camping out in random places, living rough, in regular clothes… Me and Dan actually have some stubble." [USA Today]
• Check out this picture of the very limber Jaden Smith, son of Will, who is currently filming the Karate Kid remake, Kung-Fu Kid. [The Life Files]
• Roger Avary, who won a screenwriting Oscar for Pulp Fiction, sent tweets from jail, and now is under higher security; he had been on a work furlough program but is now back in routine confinement. [NY Daily News]
• Russell Brand met Katy Perry's religious parents! Katy's dad gave Rusty a book about God's intervention, Russell gave Katy's dad My Booky Wook, in which Russell details his former life of drugs and hookers. Everyone is okay with everything and all four of them are on vacation in Austria. [The Sun]
• Congrats to Susan Boyle, who could have the number one album in the US and the UK and whose disc has the biggest opening sales of the year. [NY Daily News]
• Gary Busey has been named the unsexiest man in Hollywood. [Daily Express]
• "Liam Gallagher Brands Noel The 'Kevin Keegan Of Rock." [Independent]
• "Michael Jackson" was the most-searched term on Yahoo this year. [AP]
• ''I would have done nothing differently. I think it worked out really well.
  ''I am really happy with what I am doing now — happy in my personal life and happy with my professional life. 'I apologized for the thing I did wrong to the person I did it wrong to." — Russell Brand, regarding the prank calls he and Jonathan Ross made to Fawlty Towers actor Andrew Sachs in October 2008. [Telegraph]
• "[My father] was scary and violent. He beat the living hell out of me, and there was constant verbal abuse. Looking back on it, he probably was disappointed that I was so drawn to the arts. He probably thought I was gay. I wasn't interested in sports. I didn't know the names of any baseball players. I liked films and books and records." — Tom Petty. [Advocate via Rolling Stone]
• "The only thing that came into my mind was a decade ago, when I hit 50, I was onstage in Philadelphia, and you realize, 'OK, this is exactly where I want to be right now. I wouldn't want to be any place else.' You realize there is a finiteness to it. We're playing to an audience now that will outlive us. There will be a seed of an audience out there tonight that's just going to outlive the band. But at the same time, the band is very, very powerful right now. And part of the reason it's powerful is that it's carrying a lot of very strong cumulative history. You come and you see 35 years of a speeding train going down the track and you're going to get to be on the front end of it. We look forward to many, many more years of touring and playing and enjoying it." — Bruce Springsteen. Much more in an extensive interview at the link. [Reuters]
• "I mean, it's fine if that's what they want to focus on. It's a movie that I think is beautiful and was a joy to make. But I can only make it. If people want to make that the thing they want to talk about, it's distressing, but that's their business." — Willem Dafoe wish you would stop focusing on his mutilated genitalia in Antichrist. [New York]
• "I don't have any interest in acting anymore. Movies are a part of my past. It's been 30 years. I'm not young, but I have time to do something else. I consider my entire movie career a complete failure. The goal of movie-making is to star in a film where your performance drives the film, and the film is either a soaring critical or commercial success, and I never had that." — Say it ain't so, Alec Baldwin! [MSNBC Scoop via Men's Journal]
• "I hate that. He has such a big mouth. It drives me crazy, and it makes me want to thump him in the side of his head… It's not accurate." — Kimora Lee Simmons, when asked if it's true that Russell Simmons gives her $40,000 a month in child support. [Page Six]

• Michelle Obama wore a sterling-silver sequined dress by Indian-born designer Naeem Khan to a state dinner in honor of India's prime minister. [USAToday]
• Desiree Rogers wore Comme des Garçons. Which makes this the most fashion-forward administration, ever. [Mrs. O]

• "I feel so happy to be a part of this historical event between the two countries where my heart lies," says Khan. [People]
• And Mrs. Obama has apparently ordered thigh-high leather boots from Robert Clergerie. [Telegraph]
• Daul Kim's recent video spots for the Chanel "Cocoon" bag line are still on the Chanel website. [Racked]
• Emma Watson went to a hockey game n New York with a Spanish rock star and YSL designer Stefano Pilati. This is, apparently, big news. [Elle UK]
• The mother of Catherine McNeil, the model who appeared in public in Sydney with cuts on her arms, says that her understanding is that McNeil fell down some stairs. (Her agency said the cuts were the result of a skateboarding injury.) Her mother also said that the loneliness and distance from her family of modeling often left her feeling "down." "She hasn't had it easy. She hasn't had much of a life. I never forced her into modeling, it was her decision, it was her choice," said McNeil's grandmother, who raised her. "But it's not as glamorous as it appears. There's a lot of pressure to maintain your looks and sometimes it gets her down." [News.com.au]
• Mounir Moufarrige says Lindsay Lohan isn't going anywhere: "Yes [she's staying on], she has a job to do." Her first collection as "artistic advisor" for Ungaro led to the label being dropped by major U.S. retailers like Neiman Marcus. (Moufarrige says the clothes are "selling well.") Even Emanuel Ungaro himself — who has not been involved in the running of his namesake company since 2001 — joined in the chorus of criticism, calling Lohan's work "a disaster." "Mr Ungaro has his views, he can keep them," said Moufarrige, tartly. [Reuters]
• Victoria Beckham is re-launching her denim collection. No longer will it be sold under the name dVb: she's opted for the more prosaic "Victoria Beckham Denim." Prices will start at £140. [Elle UK]
• Of course D&G publicist Ali Wise would be getting filmed for Tinsley Mortimer's reality television show. [NYDN]
• Adidas would like to move its production of NBA jerseys to Thailand, from a factory in upstate New York. Not if Chuck Schumer has anything to do with it! [AP]
• Meanwhile, Stefano Lattanzi's Manhattan store continues to sell $18,000 men's crocodile skin boots. Women's cost $25,000. Arnold Schwarzenneger is allegedly a fan. [NYDN]
• Refinery29's list of ten fashion catchphrases — from "smize" to André Leon Talley's "I look authori-taaay!" — is dead-on, perfect, the end. [Refinery29]
• Target has announced its first ever collaboration with a millinery designer. Next April, a line of hats by Eugenia Kim — who previously did a lower-priced line for Urban Outfitters — will go on sale at the retailer. A shoe collection by Cynthia Vincent will also hit the chain on the same date. [Stylelist]
• Don't hold your breath for such a collab with Michael Kors. "We don't need to," says the orange one. [Independent]
• Jimmy Choo's collection for H&M cost up to 45% more in Ireland than it did in England. H&M says the difference reflects "taxes and transportation costs" as well as currency fluctuations. [IrishTimes]
• Christian Restoin, longtime partner of Carine Restoin-Roitfeld, is teaming up with Current/Elliot's Serge Azria to relaunch Equipment shirts. [Elle UK]
• Irina Shabayeva, of Project Runway near-fame, designed a wedding dress for Kelly Ripa. Since Ripa eloped with her husband, she wore it on national television instead of to her wedding. [People]
• Fashion blogger Lindsay Ibarra, on fashion bloggers: "What has been a pertinent trend throughout the most popular fashion blogs is the sort of self-indulgent act of getting dressed up, striking an adorable pose and writing a few witty words about what you're wearing and what you did that day. While this is all well and good for the purposes of creative journaling, what is happening more and more is that these faces are starting to be considered the new voices in fashion. Sea of Shoes blogger Jane Aldridge recently designed a line of shoes for Urban Outfitters, Julia Frakes and Rumi Neely (of Bunny Bisous and Fashion Toast, respectively) have both been signed to Next and Tavi from Style Rookie has her own fan club of editors and stylists championing her as the next Diana Vreeland. What's interesting about fashion is that it is one of few industries where you need virtually no education to be a star. Dressing and presenting yourself well take the place of a diploma or experience and in some cases even dressing yourself badly works, too." [EvilMonito]
• J. Crew's quarterly results were so far above analysts' expectations that its share price rose 7% in after-hours trading. Same-store sales for the period rose 8% on last year, and revenue rose 14%, to $414 million. [Crain's]

• Kate Moss says her motto is, "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels." [WWD]

• In December Harper's Bazaar, Victoria Beckham reveals that she is itching to dress Emma Watson. [People]
• Alexander Wang is now 100,000 Euros richer, thanks to the Swiss Textiles Award. [WWD]
• Bridget Moynahan is becoming a face of Garnier Nutritioniste skincare. [WWD]
• It took a while, but someone finally got around to identifying what Sasha and Malia wore in the official White House family portrait, and putting together a press release. (Turns out it was French children's label Dino e Lucia.) [WWD]
• Miss J, on fun times with André Leon Talley: "I was working for Lars Nilsson at Bill Blass and André Leon Talley came over to the studio with Elizabeth Taylor's epic movie Boom!, which Karl Lagerfeld did the costuming for. We got down on some fried chicken, corn bread and popcorn shrimp and were in fits of hysterics well into the night. We went from working with models who don't eat all day to watching all of us get down on some soul food!" Says Miss J, "Sticks and stones may break your bones, but fabulous gets you most places." [The Moment]
• Naomi Campbell held a Fashion For Relief runway show to raise money for maternal health in Dar Es Salaam, Tanzania. (Previous stops have included Mumbai and New York, and have raised $1 million in aid for Hurricane Katrina and the Mumbai terrorist attacks.) Campbell walked the runway for the first time in the continent of Africa, and talked about the importance of diversity in fashion. "There's definitely space [for more black models] but has there been enough effort? It was getting better but it's slipped back this year," said the model. "The world is not made up of blonde hair and blue eyes. We need to share ourselves." [Reuters]
• Claudia Schiffer wouldn't rule out starting a clothing line. "I would consider it but it would have to be the right thing. They would need to be clothes that I would want to wear." [Telegraph]
• Liu Wen will be the first Asian model to walk in the Victoria's Secret fashion show. [Modelinia]
• Marc Jacobs' fiancé, Lorenzo Martone, and Ryan Brown, formerly of Elite, are starting a talent PR agency for models together called ARC NY. Lydia Hearst has signed on. [P6]
• Mango might ink a distribution deal with a U.S. department store, like JC Penney, Macy's, Bloomingdales or Saks, to help its retail expansion. [WWD]
• What other fashion house has ever inspired poetry upon its demise?
  "Luella, we will miss
  The frills
  The spills
  But know this

  Your work will live on
  In a sample sale shirt
  I once purchased
  Cheap as chips." [Guardian]

• As one exits, another enters: Biba is being revived. Again. [Catwalk Queen]
• Jimmy Choo has opened a Chinese restaurant in London. [Elle UK]
• For $8,500, you could own a sofa in the shape of the Chanel logo. [FWD]
• Bamboo fabric, though made from a plant that can be grown without pesticides and fertilizers, is processed with toxic solvents, just like rayon and viscose are made from wood. Eco-friendly it is not. [WSJ]
• Nordstrom's revenues for the third quarter jumped 17% on last year's results, but the company missed its earnings forecast by one cent, which sent the share price tumbling. [TS]
• Abercrombie & Fitch's quarterly profit fell to $38.8 million, from $63.9 million a year ago. [Reuters]
• Sales of department store fragrances fell by 11% on last year during the first three quarters, to $1.38 billion. [WWD]
• That hasn't stopped Gwen Stefani and her perfume partners, Coty, from putting out five new Harajuku Lovers fragrances. [WWD]

• Jon Gosselin is demanding TLC stop filming Jon and Kate. He posted a sign on his gate reading, "NOTICE: NO FILM CREW OR PRODUCTION STAFF FROM TLC IS PERMITTED ON THIS PROPERTY UNDER PENELTY [sic] OF TRESPASS. JOHNATHON [sic] GOSSELIN"

• Last week Jon was fine with his kids filming, but now that he's been dropped from Kate Plus 8 he suddenly doesn't want his kids to be on camera. [TMZ]
• Jon Gosselin's manager, Mike Heller, told Perez Hilton: "Jon Gosselin is the new David and TLC is the new Goliath. Jon is empowered by his new attorney, Mark Jay Heller, to take back control of his family. Even if it means the revenue stream will be cut off. Jon's priority is family not money. THIS IS NOT A NEGOTIATION TACTIC TO get more money from TLC. We are completely cutting ties with TLC. This is something that he has been trying to do for a while now." [Perez Hilton]
• TLC responded: "We are aware of Jon Gosselin's recent statements, and remain deeply disappointed at his continued erratic behavior. He and the family were shooting as recently as last Friday, without incident, and his latest comments are grossly inaccurate, without merit and are clearly opportunistic... Despite Jon Gosselin's repeated self destructive and unprofessional actions, he remains under an exclusive contract with TLC. Direct filming of the children has been currently suspended, pending further conversations between both parents." [People]
• Kate Gosselin is similarly disappointed in Jon. She says: "I'm saddened and confused by Jon's public media statements. Jon has never expressed any concerns to me about our children being involved in the show and, in fact, is on the record as saying he believes the show benefits our children and was taping on Friday with the kids. I check in regularly with each of the kids to be sure they want to participate in and continue with the show and will continue to do so..." [People]
• Michael Lohan has weighed in on the matter saying, "All I can tell you from my conversation with him two days ago is that he does want to pursue the Divorced Dads Club... Michael Heller, he and I represent Jon on a business level, wants him to do the show. Mark is trying to get him out of the TLC contract so he can." [Radar Online]
• Sources from both sides are explaining what's really going on... or rather, their version of events. TLC sources say Jon Gosselin wanted off the show so the network offered to give him his full paycheck and take him off Jon and Kate Plus 8. But they wouldn't let Jon do any other reality show, which Jon found unacceptable. His lawyer threatened to shut down production by claiming the show wasn't good for the kids. Jon sources say the kids really have been complaining about the show, and that the show being renamed Kate Plus 8 means they'll have to be on camera a lot more to fill the void left by Jon. [TMZ]
• The most shocking thing about Michael Jackson's autopsy? He was actually pretty healthy. His heart and other organs were strong and functioning normally and at 136 lbs he was in the acceptable weight range for a 5-foot-9 man. He had arthritis in his lower back and some fingers and his lungs were chronically inflamed and had reduced capacity, but his lung condition wasn't serious enough to contribute to his death. As this is MJ, there has to be something odd: He had tattooed on eyeliner, eyebrows, and lipliner and covered a bald spot with a tattoo from ear to ear. [AP, The Telegraph]
• In a new interview with Britain's Channel 4, La Toya Jackson says that in the hospital after Michael Jackson died, Paris told her, "The cardiologist was the best, so how could this happen? What happened is they worked him too hard. He never got the chance to rest. It was non-stop work." La Toya continues, "She said, 'No, you don't understand. They kept working him and Daddy didn't want that, but they worked him constantly'. I felt so bad." [The Mirror]
• Michael Bearden, the musical director for Michael Jackson's "This Is It" tour, says the coroner's finding prove that the allegations Michael was too weak to perform weren't true and he was definitely up for performing 50+ concerts. [TMZ]
• The Jackson kids spent time with their longtime nanny, Grace Rwaramba, yesterday. [TMZ]
• Emma Watson was "quite shaken" when a group of students from the Harvard Voice stalked her at a Harvard-Brown football game. They Tweeted the progress of their "stalking mission" and posted a picture of her, calling it a "success." [Extra]
• The Voice says that their Emma Watson-stalking live blog was a "parody." The magazine responded to complaints left on their website writing, "There seems to be much ado about nothing over this photo and liveblog. Understand that these live tweets were made to be intentionally outrageous and overblown." [People]
• Could a prenup put an end to Kevin Jonas' plans to marry Danielle Deleasa? She hasn't signed yet and is reportedly taking time to come "to terms with the request." [Perez Hilton]
• Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and Colin Egglesfield got "touchy-feely" between filming scenes on Melrose Place. Watch out Pete, a source says she was even doing the "hair flip thing!" [Star]
• David Copperfield wants a judge to temporarily shelve a personal injury lawsuit filed by a woman who says he sexually assaulted her on his private island because Department of Justice prosecutors are already investigating the case. [The Smoking Gun]
• Ryan Jenkins' father has hired a private investigator because he refuses to believe that his son killed Jasmine Fiore. He says, "We just want the truth to be told ... It is just unfathomable to us that he could be responsible for anything that has been reported." [TMZ]
• John Travolta's lawer Michael McDermott testified today that the plot to blackmail Travolta was hatched because one of the defendants was star struck. McDermott says paramedic Tarino Loightbourne kept the document instead of turning it in because it was singed by a celebrity and he thought it was evidence that Travolta had either killed his son or recognized he was negligent in his death. [TMZ]
• Dennis Hopper's manager says he's "feeling much better" after checking into the hospital yesterday. He had severe flulike symptoms and was treated for dehydration. [AP]
• Randy and Evi Quaid's former private investigator claims that they scammed an 87-year-old lady named Lois. She says, "Lois worked out an agreement with Randy and Evi that they would rent her mobile home for $1,000 a month... But they never paid her and they left her place a disaster. To take advantage of an 87-year-old lady who trusted them like that is really sad." [Radar Online]
• Top Chef host Padma Lakshmi is pregnant. Her rep says, "she is carrying her first child after years of struggling with endometriosis, a cause for which she has co-founded the Endometriosis Foundation of America. As a result of her condition, this pregnancy has been referred to by her physician as nothing short of a medical miracle, and due to its delicate nature, we ask/implore the press to respect Ms. Lakshmi's privacy at this time." [Us]
• Flavor Flav dropped out of high school in 10th grade and now he's shopping a reality show about going back to school. So basically this will be a Strangers With Candy reality show. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Bethenny Frankel is getting her own reality show. It doesn't have a title yet but "will showcase her career as a natural foods chef, as well as the Gotham socialite's love life." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Intrawest, which operates nine ski resorts including the one Natasha Richardson died at six months ago, will implement a new rule this season, recommending that all skiers and snowboarders wear helmets. [AP]
• A preliminary hearing in the Anna Nicole Smith drug case against Howard K. Stern will be held on October 13. [TMZ]
• Ryan Seacrest hit on Madonna on his radio show today and she told him he's "too old" for her. She says she's dating a 22-year-old because, "Younger people are more adventurous. Have you met many guys my age? They're usually grumpy and fat and balding." She says as long as men are "old enough to dress themselves" she'll date them. She adds, "My body is a part of my job. I look in the mirror and say "more work.....less cake, more work." On the topic of Kanye West she says he's "impulsive" and that she wants to "give him a good talking to" because "he needs to put a lid on it." Finally she explains that she didn't notice Ryan in the front row of her concert because Jennifer Lopez was giving her "sharp looks." [KIISFM]
• Michael Bay announced on his website today that Transformers 3 will come out a year earlier than expected and wrote in a postscript (that came before his signature for some reason) "P.S. Megan Fox, welcome back. I promise no alien robots will harm you in any way during the production of this motion picture. Please consult your Physician when working under my direction because some side effects can occur, such as mild dizziness, intense nausea, suicidal tendencies, depression, minor chest hair growth, random internal hemorrhaging and inability to sleep. As some directors may be hazardous to your health, please consult your Doctor to determine if this is right for you." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Kevin Smith has compiled transcripts from his podcast into the book Shooting the Shit: The Best of SModcast. He says, "I don't feel like an author most days. John Grisham is an author. John Grisham sits down and is like, 'All right, I'm gonna write a story about this shit and it's gonna happen in Memphis and involve a couple lawyers, as per usual.' That's an author. I'm like, at best, a backdoor author. That sounds very homoerotic, but it's not gay porn - it's backdoor, man. I didn't intend for it to happen, I didn't go through the front door." [N.Y. Magazine]
• Drew Barrymore says of Whip It, "I didn't want it to be just another chick flick. I wanted it to stay true to girl empowerment. I wanted to make something that was also irreverent and relevant for boys. I wanted it to be emotional and yet romantic and also have action and have girls doing things you'd normally see boys do. That wasn't easy." [Reuters]
• Mo'Nique has done almost no press for Precious despite the fact that people are saying she's a possible Oscar nominee. Now her publicist of two weeks has quit and Mo'Nique is refusing to show up to the New York Film Festival on Saturday. [Showbiz 411]
• Mariah Carey has finally overcome her debilitating left side insecurity and is now allowing people to photograph either side of her face. She says, "I don't feel like, 'Oh, I have to be on this side, or I have to be on this side' — I really had specific things that someone told me when I was 19 starting in the business and I listened to them ... I don't care anymore. Sometimes I like that [left] side — and Nick likes that side better anyway." [Us]

• Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel: Photographed holding hands on Monday. A source says they've been vacationing together in Santa Barbara; As for Justin and Rihanna?

They're just "working on a track together." [Page Six]

• Mariah Carey stumbled coming out of a restaurant late at night, but was she drunk? Or just wearing 7-inch Louboutins? [Page Six]
• Harvard kids: Stalked Emma Watson when she came for a football game; thought it was hilarious. [Page Six]
• A whole column of unsolicited uterus updates! Kate Hudson: Not pregnant. Halle Berry: Not pregnant ("I've got to stop with the burgers or something!"). Penelope Cruz: asked if she was pregnant, but "answered no — in a rather baroque, roundabout way." [Gatecrasher]
• This column calls Britney Spears' new track, "3," "maddeningly repetitive." [NY Daily News]
• Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson keep being seen in public together, because ZOMG Twilight is real. [People]
• Amy Winehouse and Blake Fielder-Civil have been writing cutesy notes to each other on Facebook. A sample: "Love you too innit and vairvair proud of youse, know dis lioness civilishous. X" [The Sun]
• Add Penelope Cruz, Harrison Ford, Gael Garcia Bernal and Natalie Portman to the list of people crying "Free Roman Polanski." [Shakesville]
• "John Travolta testified Wednesday that would-be extortionists threatened to go the media with stories implying 'the death of my son was intentional and I was culpable somehow.'" [CNN]
• Kate Gosselin thinks Jon Gosselin's divorce delay is a publicity stunt; I think it has to do with making sure any TLC cash gets split up properly. [MSNBC via Radar Online]
• Wait, what?!?! "Jon Gosselin has put TLC, the cable network behind Jon & Kate Plus 8, on notice to 'cease and desist' any television production of the show and leave his property." [ET]
• Miley Cyrus has a sore throat. Will she be able to do her concert dates? [Mirror]
• Randy and Evi Quaid — who were accused of ditching a $10,000 bill at the San Ysidro Ranch — claim they never got the bill because they moved. They have now paid. [TMZ]
• Kevin Federline: Gaining weight on purpose, so he can get ready for Celebrity Fit Club. A source says: "He thinks that if he goes on the show, loses a ton of weight, and seems really likeable, he'll get more deals afterward." Probably true. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Melissa Ethereridge played on an airplane — 10,000 feet in the air — to help raise money for The Breast Cancer Research Foundation. Looks like he peeps in her audience were wearing pink! [People]
• GLAAD likes Glee. So do I! [NY Daily News]
• Jermaine Jackson is going to judge a new BBC talent show called Move Like Michael Jackson. Too soon? [Reuters]
• Joe Francis might lose his house — over a gambling debt. YAWN. [TMZ]
• Alyssa Milano thinks $3 is too much to pay for a Twitter iPhone app; the "iPhone developer community" is amused, yet angry. [Business Insider]
• In a battle between Jay-Z and Fat Joe, Jigga wins. [Page Six]
• Conan O'Brien is sorta banned from Newark Airport. [NY Daily News]
• Two weeks after giving birth, Ellen Pompeo hit a sneaker party in L.A. and announced: "I feel great." [People]
• Congrats to Will Ferrell and his wife, who are expecting their third child. [People]
• Mindy McCready, who was on Celebrity Rehab with Mackenzie Phillips, says she "absolutely" believes that Phillips had an incestuous relationship with her father and "Nobody has the right to say what they do or don't believe unless they know her." [UPI]
• Kevin Dillon: Seen flirting with women who were not his wife. [Page Six]
• Pete Doherty will be on trial in December after being charged with driving a car erratically over the summer. This story notes: "He has yet to plead to a charge of being over the legal alcohol limit while at the wheel." [Reuters]
• Male model Jamie Burke, Mark Ronson, Milla Jovovich, Simon Le Bon and Marion Cotillard are covering the song "Beds Are Burning"for the Time for Climate Justice campaign. [Page Six]
• "Former INXS and Noiseworks frontman Jon Stevens' condition has "deteriorated" nearly three weeks after emergency heart surgery." [News.com.au]
• Get well soon, Dennis Hopper. [Page Six]
• "It drives me crazy… It's just very hard to get a day's work done and concentrate." — Sarah Jessica Parker, on filming SATC on the streets of NYC with mobs of fans. [NY Daily News]
• "Honestly, I never thought I'd live this long. I always thought that I wouldn't be here at this point. I was thinking, 'Okay, I've got another year of my life left. This has got to be the end of it. Finally, [Nick] was like, "Stop talking like that." — Mariah Carey. [NY Daily News via In Touch]
• "I mean, a zombie movie? Come on. There are good zombie movies -I Am Legend and 28 Days Later- but those are the exceptions. Then I read it and I was absolutely knocked out. I thought it was just so funny and compelling." —Woody Harrelson, on Zombieland. [USA Today]
• "I always sort of cringe when people say, you're that creepy guy. Sinister I can live with, that's fine. But creepy is like someone you wouldn't sit next to at a diner. I'm probably being sensitive about it." — Michael Emerson, aka Lost's Ben Linus. [MSNBC via PopEater]
• "I'm a parent, but I always considered that slightly separate from my work. And, suddenly, I'm reading this script that really explores parenting. I felt very involved with it, because I've got two young girls and I could relate to an awful lot of it. Often, I find family movies a little cute and not very real. This felt honest." — Clive Owen on new film The Boys Are Back. [USA Today]
• TOC: You've also said, "I related to a girl who, against all odds, finds her inner strength and believes she can do what boys do." Have you felt yourself working against the odds in a Hollywood boys' club? "No, I really don't, and I actually find those women-I'm like, get that bitter, ugly, unattractive chip off your shoulder. I'm doing what any guy could be doing, and I don't do it by needing to wear a power suit. Women have made incredible strides; we're in a really balanced or better-balanced culture, and we should be celebrating that…rather than, like, 'Oh, men have all the power.' I'm like, 'Oh, boo-hoo, shut up, make it happen for yourself and get over it.'" — Drew Barrymore. [Time Out Chicago]

• Miley Cyrus will indeed be in Sex And The City 2:

The teen queen will have a scene with Kim Cattrall: Samantha Jones wants to look "hot and young" and winds up on the red carpet with Miley — wearing the same dress. Hilarious? [NY Daily News]

• Rumors that Johnny Depp will be replaced in the next Pirates of The Caribbean movie: "Completely unfounded," says a Disney spokesperson. [Mirror]
• Just yesterday, Jon Gosselin's girlfriend Hailey Glassman was on the Gosselin family website. Today? She's been deleted. [RadarOnline]
• Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom's wedding: A circus. A guest says: There were so many helicopters overhead, you couldn't hear the vows." Ok! magazine made a $250,000 deal for "exclusive" wedding pix, so when paparazzi pictures of the bride popped up on Sunday, the mag had to spend $50,000 on the shots to keep them off the market. As you may know, E! paid for the wedding, after insisting that it be held immediately so it could be on the season premiere of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. [Page Six]
• Ryan Seacrest is thinking about doing a reality show focusing on Khloe and Lamar as newlyweds. It worked out so well for Nick and Jessica! [NY Daily News]
• In other Kardashian news, Kim Kardashian is back together with Reggie Bush. Professional athletes for everyone! [NY Daily News]
• A second suspect in the Lindsay Lohan burglary has turned herself in. [NY Daily News]
• Should Kanye West go to rehab as an apology for his MTV VMA incident? Columnist Courtney Hazlett says "no, no, no." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Speaking of rehab: Amy Winehouse met a "faith healer" named Peter Hippolyte when she was in St. Lucia, and she's planning on flying him to England to help her stay off drugs and booze. Hippolyte says: "We will say prayers together and she will drink bush tea with antioxidants." [Daily Mail]
• Video: Amy Winehouse rapping. Sorta. [The Sun]
• "The timing of Roman Polanski's arrest in Switzerland on Sunday on a 31-year-old rape conviction couldn't have been better for Brett Ratner." Hours before Polanski was arrested, Ratner announced he'll be producing a sequel to Marina Zenovich's 2008 documentary, Roman Polanski: Wanted and Desired. [Page Six]
• Mariah Carey says Precious director Lee Daniels helped her shed some insecurities — he made her arrive to the set without any makeup, and forced her to leave the diva act at home. "That was such a freeing experience for me… By making me look so bad he brought out the ability to never be self-conscious again, and that was a gift that he gave me." On the rumors that Mariah and Nick Cannon are trying to get pregnant, she says: "Well, we enjoy practicing." [AP]
• Jon Hamm and Elisabeth Moss are on the October cover of LA Confidential, and inside Jon says: "The [show] is not meant to be on while you're doing dishes, it's meant to be enjoyed and savored and focused on, and it rewards that attention…" [JustJared]
• At Teen Vogue's 7th annual Young Hollywood party, Kelly Osbourne was overheard telling a friend that she was "shocked" how short the skirts of the young party girls were. [Page Six]
• Randy and Evi Quaid are called "Hollywood's Nightmare Couple" in this extensive piece. Evi allegedly self-medicated with Demerol three times a day, snorting it so it would go right to her brain to cure her migraines. A source says: "She also … believed [Michael] Jackson was murdered along with Heath Ledger, Chris Penn, David Carradine, Natasha Richardson, and other stars who (had been) in movies with Randy." The paranoia that someone was out to get them, and that they weren't safe anywhere, lead to a string of unpaid hotel bills. [The Daily Beast]
• "The enormous sign Evi Quaid made last week — which accused her arresting officer of taking bribes — somehow caught fire this weekend…" [TMZ]
• Emma Watson was "shaken" at the Harvard/Brown football game when security guards had to protect her from gawkers. [Page Six]
• Mel Gibson is asking a judge to remove his 2006 DUI from his record, now that he has completed the terms of his 3-year probation. [TMZ]
• Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York, has announced that a major US film company has bought the rights to her series of children's books. She says: "The films will run as a series… America has been so good to me. I failed in Britain, and when I gave it a go in America I was ready to fail there, too — but they have really embraced me." [Daily Mail]
• Emmy Rossum, who kept her marriage a secret all year, will be officially divorced in about 180 days. Court documents reveal that she married record label exec Justin Siegel in February, and that he wants Emmy to pay his legal expenses for the divorce and give him spousal support. He's all, "That's all I ask… of youuuuuu." [E!]
• Emmy is currently dating Sideshow Bob Adam Duritz. [People]
• American Idol castoff Adam "Glambert" Lambert's CD is available for pre-order on Amazon, and is currently number 2 — ahead of Madonna and the Beatles. [NY Post]
• Darrell Hammond's name is missing from the opening credits of Saturday Night Live, and a source says: "He's interested in pursuing acting more, but he's loyal to Lorne Michaels, and Lorne will always have a place for him on SNL for as long as Darrell is willing to come back." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Barbra Streisand's new CD is nostalgic, though the recording process was not: "For the first time, she worked with jazz artist Diana Krall as producer, and did it Krall's way. She performed with Krall's quartet of musicians first, then added orchestration later, instead of her usual practice of performing with an orchestra at the outset." [AP]
• Malaysia has banned Bruno because of the gay sex scenes. According to this column, "Gay sex, or 'carnal intercourse against the order of nature,' is punishable by up to 20 years in jail and whipping in Malaysia." Their views on homosexuality suck, but as far as the film goes, they're not missing anything. [Mirror]
• Mary-Louise Parker, 45, is dating musician Charlie Mars, 35. [NY Daily News]
• Jaime Pressley and new hubby Simran Singh got into a huge fight on their wedding night, maybe because Jaime had too much to drink. [Radar Online]
• "The Inside Scoop on Starting in TV" is the story of how Lara Spencer got her start. [WSJ]
• Jon Cryer and his wife, Lisa Joyner, have adopted a baby girl. [People]
• 90210 2.0's AnnaLynne McCord actually wants to be on the cover of Cosmo. [Page Six]
• "A former aide to Danielle Steel is facing time in federal prison after admitting she stole hundreds of thousands of dollars from the romance novelist." [AP]
• Al Sharpton and actress LisaRaye: It's on. [TheYBF]
• Police officials now have the hard drive found with Ryan Jenkins when he was discovered dead in a hotel room back in August. There was no suicide note, so cops are hoping the computer will shed light on the murder of Jasmine Fiore. [TMZ]
• Whatshisname does not have an eating disorder. [The Sun]
• "In terms of the stress there's just no comparison. For me, at least, writing a novel is a great pleasure. There is stress but it's a different kind of stress: more mental than physical. In a film you're working nights and 16-hour days. Here I am saying poor me, when I've been paid pretty well for that work, but it's a fact. It doesn't matter how much you're being paid. At my age I just feel I don't want to do that any longer. So, the writing is really a godsend." — Gene Hackman, who has quit acting for writing, He and Daniel Lenihan have written three works of fiction, and their latest, Escape From Andersonville, is a Civil War adventure. [The Daily Beast]
• "I am enrolling in Berklee College in Boston to get my bachelor's degree in music! That's how important education is to me. I plan to work with Rev. Al Sharpton because that's how important stressing the importance of education to children is to me." — Wyclef Jean. [BV Buzz]
• "I wasn't nervous because I'd got my body and mind into shape for it. My aim is to become an iconic sex symbol and the Playboy shoot is the first step. I wanted to be toned and curvaceous with a nice butt–I didn't want to lose weight and look skinny." — Heidi Montag on her Playboy shoot. She also says: "I'm a C cup but I want to upgrade to a DD cup. I have a curvy butt now and bigger boobs will enhance my shape." [Prz]
• "Seriously, I feel exactly the same now turning 50 as I did when I was 40 or 30. I am enjoying myself. I happen to think that I am just extraordinarily lucky. I am doing something that I am passionate about and that I enjoy doing. There are a couple of charities I am involved with that would appreciate a donation. But please, no presents from anyone." — Simon Cowell turns 50 tomorrow and will throw a big party this weekend. [Telegraph]
• "We're having Gore Vidal on. Larry David is booked. Those two are favorites of mine. And the usual suspects: Ann Coulter. Susie [Essman] will be on. Barbara [Walters] might be on the first week because she's the queen. Alec Baldwin- I can't get him on the phone. I saw him recently at a U.N. function. He's the funniest. He trusts me because I'm not out to get him. I'm not. Last time I interviewed him, his daughter was there and they were really close." — Joy Behar on her new HLN show, which starts tonight at 9pm. [USA Today]
• "She speaks like this weird white-person ebonics. She has this weird language. She doesn't technically read. But it's OK; she doesn't have to." — Kathy Griffin on Paris Hilton. [Page Six]
• "Come on over and see me after you finish." — Ellen Barkin to Matt Damon. [Page Six]
• "With ratings falling, this might be the last season of Jon & Kate Plus 8. I'm not sure yet." — Kate Gosselin, on her Facebook page. [NY Post]

MK returns to her haute sac-dame roots, albeit a grown-up version.


A refined, Victorian twist on the trench!


Check the hem: runway to reality!


Absurdly romantic! Not in the bad way!


Emma Watson's such a genius direction for the company to take.


Fur: Anna should be pleased.


Liv Tyler demonstrates the best costume for the front row.


Kind of digging the literal recasting.


Victoria Beckham, even clad in classic clean lines, never looks less than Victoria Beckham - it's a talent.


Runway...


...to reality!

[Images via Getty]

[London, September 21. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

• "It has been the most incredible gap-year project," says Emma Watson on her new ethical fashion line. What happened to Habitat for Humanity? [WWD]

• Quoth the Chanel-clad sorceress: "I wanted to help People Tree produce a younger range because I was excited by the idea of using fashion as a tool to help alleviate poverty and knew it was something I could help make a difference with." [Telegraph]
• Coco Rocha takes a more traditional path, going with her church to work in Costa Rica. "My religion has always been important to me." [FashionWeekDaily]
• Christian Audigier, the man behind douche-outfitters Ed Hardy and Von Dutch, is for some reason going to be in a movie. "Explains" his agent, "The guy is a natural... Christian is into fighting, boxing, martial arts. And he wants to show people that side. That skill set." Oh, he's also cutting an album. [GQ]
• Speaking of multimedia: Versace has launched Facebook and Twitter accounts. As Karl Lagerfeld could tell them: demode. [WWD]
• If you don't feel you can exactly pull of Aretha's inaugural chapeau, here's a more wearable option: the Queen of Soul, avec chapeau, immortalized on a limited-edition tee. [New York]
• Whoa: Gaultier for Target? We could use a $20 cone bra...[WWD]
• And speaking of collabs: Christopher Kane for Topshop is awesome, selling brilliantly. Bring. It. Here. Now. [Independent]
• Says LVMH's prez: "There are four main elements to our business model-product, distribution, communication and price. Our job is to do such a fantastic job on the first three that people forget all about the fourth." They're not there yet. [Economist]
• Leigh Lezark, the somewhat vacant, sinister and inexplicably beloved former Misshape, has been tapped as the "brand ambassador" for Charles Worthington's new range. [ElleUK]
• Speaking of celeb faces, Alexander Wang: "Today, more than ever, it definitely makes a difference. But for us, it's always about finding the right person, whether it's an A-list celebrity or someone on the Internet who understands our brand and has a lot of influence on people." [WWD]
• A Coach employee is suing his supervisor for sexual harassment. "It was one of those weiner dogs and he would say, 'Ok, I have a big weiner, you wanna come see my weiner?'" [NYDN]
• Oh noes! Prescriptives - and its awesome custom-blend foundation - is a recession casualty. Parent company Estee Lauder is shutting the brand down as a cost-cutting measure. [WWD]
• Apparently Emmanuel Ungaro chose Lindsay Lohan for the role of "artistic adviser" over Madonna and Paris because the troubled starlet brings "something younger, more cool, with a different attitude." That and she has bullshit-fashion experience from Project Runway! [AP]
• "Microluxury" - teeny-tiny dolly-sized luxe accessories - are, maybe, the wave of the future. Or maybe not. [Time]
• Ann Taylor's flaks must be working overtime: the working-gal's label, working hard to change its frumpy image, got a whole laundry-list of celebs to go to the runway show. In attendance: Jennifer Esposito, Vanessa Williams, Mena Suvari, Gretchen Mol, Kelly Rutherford, Kelly Bensimon, Laila Ali, Katherine McPhee and Amanda Bynes. [WWD]
• Speaking of brands trying to turn it around: Gap is experimenting with a "Results-Only Work Environment" in which "employees are empowered to work whenever and wherever they want as long as the work gets done." Were guessing it's not quite as fun as that sounds. Because we can fold from a bar just fine. [BW]
• The skint Lacroix has a number of "suitors of means." Await reports on possible saviors. [WWD]
• Well, this one will work for sure: new cellulite-busting tights have crystals in the weave that'll shear the bumps right off. [Daily Mail]
• Tommy Hilfiger is a rebel: his new flagship is on Fifth Avenue. "Donna, Ralph, Calvin, Oscar, Michael? They're all on Madison," a block away, he declares. [Style.com]
• British psychiatrists are warning that London Fashion Week, with its accompanying trigger for ED-prone girls who regard the models as "thinspiration." [Telegraph]
• Meanwhile, anti-sweatshop protesters are taking on the tents. Celeb faces of "Love Fashion Hate Sweatshops" include Gael Garcia Bernal. [Mirror]
• At Peter Som's show, "the especially young models, perched in shiny chrome or deep-blue pumps, posed in groups of three on white pedestals while the crowd milled below them." The designer was inspired by "cruise ships, antique photographs and Japanese prints." [Observer]
• Isaac Mizrahi, meanwhile, celebrated his return to Fashion Week with the theme "Astaire Case or Obstacle Course." [Yahoo]
• Celebrity stylist Philip Bloch is filling the need for another style manual. The Shopping Diet: Spending Less and Getting More is, he says, "something all of us shopaholic recessionistas need — a self-help on excess shopping." [NY Post]
• Inevitably, teens can now buy a copy of the prom dress Bella Swan wore in Twilight - from the very town where Bella got hers! Can a vampire escort be far behind? [NYDN]

• Emma Watson is doing a clothing line with ethical fashion company People Tree. We're still waiting for Mischa Barton's collection, Tree People. [Guardian]

• Rachel Zoe, on extra-curricular fashion week activities: "I went to a meeting with a potential book publisher, because I am starting to wrap my head around doing my next book, which I am really excited about. I've gotten a little bit of my creative writing fill with doing the Zoe Report, my daily newsletter, and really remembered how much I love writing." Funny, because I met the Zoe Report's ghost blogger a couple weeks back! (Nice girl.) [Time]
• Jil Sander's line for Uniqlo, +J, starts hitting stores on October 1. The legendary German perfectionist says, "I like the concept of basic clothes in a democratic world. Uniqlo reminds me of Apple computers; fantastic design for everyone. And I like what is Japanese about Uniqlo, a strong sense of tradition, the orderly approach to everything, great know-how and logistics." Uniqlo dreams of taking over the position of Inditex — parent company of Zara — as the world's largest apparel company by 2020. The success of the retail chain's planned expansion will rest in large part on Sander's talents. [Telegraph]
• Journalistic pet peeve #1: Confusing "discrete" for "discreet." Journalistic pet peeve #2: Spending ten minutes reading an article that tediously explains events that happened a year ago. Who doesn't already know that last fall, "upscale department stores...started slashing prices to unload a glut of inventory. Saks fired the first volley, slapping 70%-off signs on luxury designer clothing in early November 2008. Neiman and Barneys frantically followed suit." [Time]
• For some apparel trade news that is actually, you know, news, how about this: apparel sales rose 2.4% from July to August, the biggest month-to-month increase since February. Sales were still down 5% on last August. [NYTimes]
• If more couples are staying home to have sex because of the recession — sex being, as Chip Lambert pointed out in The Corrections, one of the few pleasures in life that's actually free — wouldn't we be buying fewer pajamas, not more? [Telegraph]
• Courtney Love's fashion week highlights, so far: "Me playing at Alexander Wamg. That was certainly the fucking best. And then the second best was me playing at Alexander Wang." Anything else? "The Rodarte bitches were awesome." [The Cut]
• Abercrombie & Fitch has lost its appeal in the discrimination case brought by the family of an autistic girl who was not allowed to go into a changing room with her sister at the Mall of America store. The then-14-year-old was shopping with her then-17-year-old sibling, who notified a sales assistant that her sister had a disability and could not be left alone. In court, Abercrombie trotted out a psychologist as an expert witness who said that, "this experience is best considered to be a desirable outcome of active community involvement." Because having Abercrombie refuse to make a reasonable accommodation "offers the parents the opportunity to model social problem solving and coping skills to their daughter, as they have done so well throughout her life, and thus prepare her for such future natural community experiences." Abercrombie was fined $115,264. [MPR]
• Dan Ariely, the professor who studies branding and behavior and who concludes that wearing counterfeit designer goods makes people more dishonest in their every day life — on the basis of one study, which lacked a control group — is back to explain his nifty ideas in video format. How about this new rule for science: No studies where the scientist explains his methods thus: "We got Chloé to give us sunglasses..." And no studies that are presented at conferences convened by Harper's Bazaar. [BigThink]
• Dan Caten, one half of DSquared, on the brand's new eyewear line: "It's a way that people can buy into the brand. Maybe some people can't afford to buy the clothes or fit in the clothes." Instead of making clothes above a size 10, let's license out some sunglasses! (Average price: $391.) Perfect solution. [WSJ]
• Ann Taylor is holding an in-season runway show tonight in New York, with a real fashion quotient: Kate Young will be styling. It's all part of the retailer's attempt to turn around its dowdy image. (You may have noticed the new ad campaign starring model Cameron Russell.) [WWD]
• Heidi Klum, whom you may have heard of, is taking Cameron's spot for the retailer's holiday ads. But don't expect her at the show, because she's expecting, and can't fly to New York. [NYPost]
• Vogue's publisher, Tom Florio, doesn't want to talk about McKinsey — but he will take a softball on why he goes to fashion shows: "I look for trends in the business. Like the whole idea of luxury at a better price point, which is something Tory Burch is doing. I try to get a sense of the sociological trends which our editors will adapt. It just adds a little context. You need to understand the business trends like global warming and fabrics getting lighter and more transitional pieces in fashion. If you can speak intelligently about these things when you sell ad pages, you can sort of take their [advertisers'] point of view." [NYObs]
• Burberry, which already has around 600,000 Facebook friends, is launching its own social networking site at artofthetrench.com. Christopher Bailey has commissioned Scott Schuman to take pictures of people wearing Burberry trench coats around the world for the site. Users will also be able to send in pictures of themselves wearing Burberry trench coats. [FT]
• The British brand will also stream its Prorsum fashion show live over the Internet. It's scheduled for September 22, 6:30 p.m., London time. [WWD]
• Avon president Elizabeth Smith is leaving the company. No replacement has yet been named. [Crain's]
• French Connection has laid off 50 workers at its head offices and closed its offices in Denmark and Sweden as a response to continued weak sales. [Independent]

• Unsolicited uterus update: Nicole Richie is in labor!

She has been admitted to the hospital to give birth to her second child with Joel Madden. Details to come. [ET]

• Spoilery secrets from Sex And The City 2: Gay wedding! And Jesus on Manolos, if Miley Cyrus is in the movie that has got to be one of the signs of the apocalypse. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Cops rushed to Halle Berry's house yesterday when someone tripped an alarm on the property by accident. [TMZ]
• Janet Jackson will open the MTV Video Music Awards with a musical tribute to her brother, Michael Jackson. [USA Today]
• It's been decided: Michael Jackson's three children will not enroll at the school Tito's kids attend; they will continue to be home schooled by the same tutors they had under Michael's supervision. [TMZ]
• "Various members of Michael Jackson's family tell TMZ they are already talking about lawyers who might rep them in a wrongful death lawsuit against Dr. Conrad Murray… In California, Jackson's immediate family could sue for the economic loss they have suffered by Jackson's death — e.g., the financial support Jackson could have provided had he lived. Here's the problem — Jackson's death may actually be an economic gain. It's already becoming clear Michael Jackson is more profitable in death than he was in the last years of his life." [TMZ]
• Emma Watson's first days at Brown University: Not going so great. The paparazzi shot her doing orientation activities, and a Twitter user wrote: "My dad made Emma Watson mad by taking a photo of her going inside the Financial Aid office at Brown. She was with her mom & boyfriend." And now: A CNN story! [CNN]
• Rihanna's dad: Not too thrilled about Rihanna topless (but wearing pasties) in Italian Vogue: "The photo was disturbing," he told Us Weekly. He was, however, amused by Chris Brown on Larry King Live: "The costume he wore was so funny. That bow tie thing. He needs to bury that." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Uh-oh. According to this column, even though a judge ordered Chris Brown and Rihanna to stay away from each other, they can't. A source says "They spoke to their lawyers to see what was allowed, and are now planning two weeks in Mexico." As always, consider the source on this. [MSNBC via Britain's Star]
• Tila Tequila's lawyer claims that Shawne Merriman's version of events is "spin." In a statement, Tila's rep says: "Fortunately, we as a society will not tolerate a 6'4", 270 pound all-pro NFL linebacker physically assaulting a young lady who is 4'11" and 93 pounds. It is never justifiable to brutally assault, choke, strike and imprison a woman." [TMZ]
• Shawne Merriman's ex-girlfriend says "he never laid a hand on me" and "it's out of his character" to lash out at a woman. [TMZ]
• Kate Hudson was spotted wearing a diamond band on THAT finger, so speculation is that it's a meaningful gift from A-Rod. [Gatecrasher]
• Amy Winehouse's dad caught his daughter in bed with none other than "druggie and former jailbird" Blake Fielder-Civil. Mitch Winehouse allegedly threatened to "punch his lights out." [The Sun]
• Brody Jenner met with cops yesterday to make a statement about the altercation between his girlfriend Jayde Nicole and Girls Gone Wild mastermind Joe Francis. [Radar Online]
• Antonio Banderas told Ellen that knee operations after a skiing accident required Melanie Griffith to use narcotics again, which is why she went to rehab. Antonio says: "In March, she came to me and said, 'I'm feeling a little bit weak in my determination for this ... so I just thought to go to rehabilitation by myself. So the whole entire family is supporting her, and I am supporting her, and at this particular time more than ever. I'm very proud of her." [People]
• Jay-Z will perform at Madison Square Garden on Friday at a special September 11 benefit concert, and tickets — originally priced at $55 — are being scalped for $200 to $3,000. Jay says he's "disheartened." [AP]
• Yoko Ono allegedly told Britain's Sky News channel that the entire Beatles' music catalog will be made available on iTunes; then the news item was removed. Is an announcement imminent? [MSNBC]
• This report claims that the Yoko/iTunes story is untrue. [CBS News]
• Kourtney Kardashian baby shower "secrets" at the link. [People]
• Kourtney Kardashian's baby daddy, Scott Disick, hangs out with Kevin Federline. [Page Six]
• Pamela Anderson has been dating this electrician/surfer for a while now, but People calls it a "new shocker." [People]
• Pam Anderson plays a scantily clad security guard who strips passengers of animal products in a new PETA ad, which the CNN Airport Network has deemed too racy, saying "children make up part of the demographic in airports." [Page Six]
• Simon Cowell is planning a massive, $400,000 party for his 50th birthday, with Elton John, Kevin Spacey, Denise Richards and Donald Trump attending. [MSNBC]
• Robert Rodriguez is taking over Austin, Texas as his new flick, Machete, starts filming. Look for Jessica Alba, Robert De Niro, Michelle Rodriguez and, yes, Lindsay Lohan. [Page Six]
• Lil Wayne's North American tour grossed about $42 million and drew nearly 804,000 fans, making it the highest grossing hip-hop outing of the year — and the most lucrative rap tour that Billboard has ever tracked. Plus, that kind of cash buys a lot of whatever Weezy drinks out of that styrofoam cup. [Reuters]
• Halle Berry is in talks to star in action-thriller Dark Tide. Penned by Amy Sorlie, the story concerns a diving instructor who returns to the deep after a near-fatal incident with a Great White shark. [Variety]
• Rapper Eve was in the VIP area of a club when she got hungry, so she asked for "something vegetarian, like grilled cheese or chicken fingers." [Page Six]
• Everything you never wanted to know about Sydney Andrews, the Melrose Place character played by Laura Leighton. [People]
• Laura Krafft — who once worked for Stephen Colbert — will head the writing team for Wanda Sykes' new show. [Page Six]
• Spandau Ballet: Making a comeback. [Daily Mail]
• "For a while I thought, well, maybe I just don't want to work any more, or work now, because nothing was appealing to me. It actually was a little nerve-racking. But I read this and I thought: 'Here's something.'" — Edie Falco on Nurse Jackie. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "9/11 has been the pretext for the systematic dismantling of our Constitution and Bill of Rights… the official story behind 9/11 is a fraud" — Charlie Sheen. [Page Six]
• "The second time I had plastic surgery I got it done for free. People was covering it and I met a team of doctors that had a publicist who kept adding procedures. The guy who did my LASIK surgery wanted to do a 'tune-up' and now I've had five surgeries on my eye. I have partial blindness in one of my eyes, actually. It was very much like Nip/Tuck where they'd be like, 'Tell me what you don't like about yourself,' and then they'd draw all over you with markers to highlight your 'problem' areas. […] Besides, I actually have a theory that my original nose has grown back. I heard that your ears and nose continue to grow as you age so I think that I'm right back to where I started." — Kathy Griffin. [Time]
• "We never wanted to be parents, with all that entails: the loss of freedom, total dependency. I didn't have a work ethic for such a long time. Imagine if I had a child like me? I didn't start earning until I was 36. I'm the sort of person who has to check three times that I've shut the door, so I'd probably stare at a kid all day to check it was breathing." — Ricky Gervais on he and partner Jane Fallon's decision not to have children. [The Sun]
• "I'm not the kind of woman who waits a lot. [Laughs.] I take life as it is, and it just happened that my masseuse, Su-Man, asked me, 'Do you want to dance?' I was lying on the table having a massage, and I said, 'Yes.' Then I met with Akram, and they proposed, 'Do you want to do three days of trying something together?' But I never think of time, because when you're inside of your life, you don't think of time. It's a learning process with my body, and it's challenging, but I love it because it allows me to enter different worlds, spaces, and fears. I don't want to go to the same place. Otherwise, I'm bored." — Juliette Binoche, on In-I, a dance performance she choreographed with Akram Khan, in BAM's Next Wave Festival. [Village Voice]
• Q: Paparazzi get photos of celebrities doing pretty much everything, but they never seem to get pictures of stars after surgery. Why is that? A: Oh, there's a whole system you need to know about. First of all, the plastic surgeons in Beverly Hills all have secret celebrity doors. After the surgery, you leave the plastic surgeon's office covered in a sheet that's not unlike a burqa. Your assistant takes you to an upscale hotel where you hide in a dark room of shame until you're better. There are bandaged rich ladies walking around the hallways of the Four Seasons and the Peninsula in Beverly Hills right now. It's not unlike being a war criminal or a terrorist. — Kathy Griffin. [Time]

• Emma Watson has arrived at Brown University… And so have the paparazzi:

That's why there are these pix of her super-casual and hanging with other students on the quad of the Rhode Island campus. [Daily Mail]

• Following reports of an assault, San Diego Chargers linebacker Shawne Merriman says he did not hurt Tila Tequila and was only trying to restrain her from leaving his home while she was drunk. Merriman's statement reads: "I was concerned about her welfare given the intoxicated state she appeared to be in and I encouraged her to stay until safe transportation could be provided." But Tila called 911 and she signed a citizen's arrest form alleging that Merriman choked and restrained her. [LA Times]
• Tila Tequila's Twitter feed has more than 243,000 followers, and following the incident, she tweeted that she was safe at home and thanked fans for their concern. But she added: "I am allergic to alcohol. It has been publicly known for years. That is how I got the name Tila 'Tequila' cuz the irony. I can't drink." Which seems to dispute Shawne Merriman's take on the incident. Later she tweeted: "I am only 93 pounds and 4'ft 11...." [CNN, TMZ]
• Shawne Merriman's lawyer says other people were in the house at the time of the incident and "witness after witness after witness will back up his story 100 percent." [CNN]
• Shawne Merriman says of his alleged assault on Tila Tequila: "We would all do our best to help a friend if we considered their actions to be detrimental to their personal safety. I'm still glad I did what I did." [NY Post]
• Lindsay Lohan is such a big True Blood fan that she posted this picture of herself wearing a studded choker and vampire fangs on her Twitter with the words "my dream." Is she trying to audition? [NY Daily News]
• Tyra Banks is talking about her decision to appear without a weave or extensions on Tomorrow's episode of her show: "I feel like it's my responsibility. I've shown myself with no makeup, cellulite on my butt, untouched photos of myself, but I haven't really shown my hair.
  "It's a mystery. People are like, 'Does she have any hair?' Young girls come up to me all the time and say, 'I want to look like you, be like you.' I want to show them what I really look like." [Digital Spy via Entertainment Tonight]
• More from Tyra: "It's just me coming straight out of the shower with wet hair. My hairdresser's going to do my hair live on stage." Tyra is also launching an online "magazine," Tyra: Beauty Inside & Out. "I'm really interested in helping women take control of their futures, take control of their destiny. One of my lines in my manifesto on the Web site is to be the CEO of your own life, be in control of your own life," she says. [AP]
• Tyra made Perez Hilton promise he wouldn't mock celebrities under the age of 18, and in return she invited him to be a guest judge on ANTM. A few days later, Perez mocked 15-year-old Tallulah Willis. [Gatecrasher]
• Lady Gaga was doing lots of coke when her dad gave her a talking to: "My father is a really powerful man, a telecom guy. So he looked at me one day and said, 'You're fuckin' up, kid.' And I looked at him and thought, 'How does he know that I'm high right now?' And he never said a word about the drugs, not one word. But he said, 'I just wanna tell you that anyone you meet while you're like this, and any friend that you make in the future while you are with this thing, you will lose.' And we never talked about it again." [Daily Mail]
• Prince Harry and Chelsy Davy: Reunited and it feels so good? [Telegraph]
• Dr. Oz is leaving Oprah Winfrey for his own talk show. Junk food is banned backstage and his show will focus on health "hot topics" like weight loss and swine flu. "There is no question we can save lives every day if we can motivate people to do what we're talking about. The challenge isn't what to say - because we know that - the challenge is how to say it so people are motivated." [AP]
• Plots near Michael Jackson's final resting place at Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Glendale have gone up $2,000 to $3,000 each; one person who owns a unit near MJ"s crypt is asking $34,000 for a double unit inside Jackson's mausoleum. Can't take it with you. [TMZ]
• Randy Jackson says that a helicopter "severely disrupted" Michael Jackson's funeral. [NY Daily News]
• Ralph Fiennes presented Vanessa Redgrave — Natasha Richardson's mother — with a lifetime achievement gong at the Harper's Bazaar magazine's Women Of The Year Awards, saying he had a "great friendship" with Richardson and calling Redgrave a woman of "truth, of loyalty, of integrity, of passion, of compassion." [Mirror]
• Singer Leona Lewis' cousin Adrian Henry, who has a previous conviction for rape, has just been sentenced to six years for robbing a "hard working family." [Daily Mail]
• Mischa Barton: Spotted outside of a gym with a bag of McDonald's, talking to someone who looked like a trainer and saying, "Do I have to?" [Gatecrasher]
• Jon Gosselin's "family day" was interrupted by an ambulance visit: His grandmother fell in his driveway. She'll be fine. (Those of us sick of Gosselin updates, on the other hand…) [E!]
• Jon Gosselin was convinced that Kate Gosselin was hiding a large sum of money in a "secret trust." His attorney gave her a deadline to reveal where the money is, and she complied: The cash is currently in a trust for the children's future. [Page Six]
• Jon Gosselin on Kate Gosselin: "I don't trust her anymore. I was abused ... I was beaten down ... I'm not going back to that life style." And! "In 10 years, I've never gone out... When she said, 'I don't want you going out,' I ... I used to say, 'OK, I'm not going to go out.' I was very passive. This is the first time I said, 'You know what? I want to see my friends. I'm going out. That was the first time in my life I ever stood up to Kate... I just felt like I had to take back some time in my life, and I did it. And I felt really good. I made my own decision... I was beaten down for so long, I couldn't even make my own decision. And when I did, I was like, holy cow! You know? Yeah, what's she gonna do? Divorce me? All right. Obviously. You know." Plus: "My mom and my brothers, they say to me, 'It's so good to have the real Jon back. It's so good to have the warm, loving, kind, caring person that we knew you when you were ... before you got married.' I've changed for her. Because I loved her ... But don't forget who you are. That's what happened to me." More from his Good Morning America interview with Chris Cuomo at the link. [Us Magazine]
• Jon Gosselin: "I can't sit on the sofa with that woman. I can't sit on someone right now that I despise." [GMA/ABC News]
• The tattoo parlor in New York where Rihanna inked a few people (her tattoo artist, BangBang, and his coworkers) has been fined for "operating with an unlicensed tattoo artist on site." [NY Daily News]
• Remember the fight between Joe Francis and Brody Jenner a couple of weeks ago? Joe was allegedly harassing former girlfriend Abbey Wilson when Brody and Jayde Nicole intervened. The latest is that afterward, Joe sent moving trucks over to Abbey's house to take her furniture away; he felt if she was going to lie about the incident, he wasn't going to let her keep anything he'd ever bought her. [TMZ]
• Joe Francis is being sued by a construction company for money owed for work on his Bel Air home. [TMZ]
• Joy Behar's new talk show debuts on HLN September 29, and the network formerly known as CNN Headline News is becoming incredibly lady-friendly. Joy's show is at 9pm, and she's followed by Jane Velez-Mitchell and Nancy Grace. [AP]
• How did Matt Damon gain 30 pounds for his role in The Informant? "I just ate everything I could see." More specifically: "I started eating like crazy and drinking dark beer. Between meals on set, I'd eat a No. 1 Value Meal at McDonald's and then Doritos on top of it. It was absolute heaven… Now I'm the Sexiest Man Alive's chunky cousin." [Daily Mail]
• Teri Hatcher is training for a triathalon. [People]
• Whoa: Sean Penn was spotted with Sports Illustrated swimsuit (and bodypaint) model Jessica White?!?! [Page Six]
• Rave reviews for Mo'Nique's performance in Precious! Forbes.com media critic Bill McCuddy says: "She doesn't steal the film — she kicks, screams and pummels it into an Oscar no-brainer." Trailer here. [Page Six]
• Taylor Momsen's band, Pretty Reckless, will play a Teen Vogue party tonight. [Page Six]
• Kourtney Kardashian's boyfriend has adjusted to her mood swings, so you can all just relax. [People]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Eric Dane put his hand on Rebecca Gayheart's belly at DJ AM's funeral, so she must be pregnant. [Page Six]
• "Paul Simon says he had nothing to do with the recent cancellation of a performance of the stage play The Sound of Silence in Sweden." [UPI]
• Samantha Burke, who is eight months pregnant with Jude Law's spawn, is "excited" with only one month to go. [The Sun]
• "Hip-hop artist and actor Ludacris' Ludacris Foundation and Nissan South gifted 20 needy people in the Atlanta area with cars Sunday, organizers said… Winners of the "Ludacares Stimulus Package" contestant drove away with used vehicles and are entitled to free gas for 30 days." [UPI]
• Actress Marley Shelton gave birth to a girl named West Flynn on Sunday. [People]
• Mohammed Ismail, father of Slumdog Millionaire child star Azharuddin Ismail, died in Mumbai on Friday; he'd been suffering from tuberculosis for over a year. Mohammed made the news earlier this year when he slapped his son for refusing to give interviews after returning from L.A. [Hndustan Times]
• Bianca Jagger lost a €200,000 platinum-and-aquamarine ring in Salzburg in August 2008; Austrian millionaire Reinhard Ringler found the ring and wanted a reward; the whole thing has turned into a mess with a three-month settlement period. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "A jury in San Diego County, Calif., has found in favor of TV actor Tom Selleck and his family in regards to a disputed horse sale." [UPI]
• Bee Gees reunion! [UPI]
• John Lydon — aka Johnny Rotten of the Sex Pistols — is reforming his band Public Image Ltd (PiL) after a 17 year hiatus. [Reuters]
• Click if you want to read Tom Jones recount a story about Elvis with his pants down. [Telegraph]
• Whatshername and Whathisname will be officially divorced today. [Mirror]
• "It kind of feels like graduating. I'm still really good friends with all the producers and directors and everyone, so it really only feels like a graduation." — Audrina Patridge on leaving The Hills for her "spicier, edgier, older" reality show. [People]
• "My brothers and I came home one day for lunch-I was at the Hackley School… and my mother, who was being pursued by creditors, had a TripTik map in her hand. She said, ‘We're going on a vacation. We're going to visit every man I ever went out with, from the time I was in Miss Semple's finishing school, to find out if I made a mistake.' She found the first one in St. Louis and told us, 'Most divine man I ever met-he made the winning touchdown in the Harvard-Yale game. I just don't want to surprise him with all of you.' So at the restaurant my brothers and I waited in the car. Twenty minutes later, she came out and said, 'Oh, my God. He's let himself go.' Further south, she'd tell the man, 'Meet me on the corner,' and we'd drive by very slowly and she'd say, ‘Oh, no. Oh, no.'" — George Hamilton, on My One and Only, a film based on an odd road trip that he and his brothers took with their mother in 1955. [The New Yorker]
• "The commitment and devotion of my fans in the UK, otherwise known as 'my little monsters', has made for a truly memorable and successful year for myself and The Fame. I am honoured to be the songwriter and performer behind the number one and number three all-time most downloaded songs in history in the UK." — Lady Gaga. [Mirror]
• "I think that's because it's just instinctual as a woman to be the caretaker of your home. Women complain that men don't do enough, but it's your own fault. You train your man to do nothing. You can't blame someone for not knowing what his or her job should be if you don't ask for it right off the bat." — Jennifer Aniston. [MSNBC via Australian Harper's Bazaar]
• "My cocaine soundtrack was The Cure. I loved all their music, but I listened to this one song on repeat while I did bags and bags of cocaine. ‘Whatever I do/It's not enough.' Isn't that funny? At the time I didn't think there was anything wrong with me until my friends came over and said, ‘Are you doing this alone?' Um, yes. Me and my mirror." — Lady Gaga. [ONTD via Showbiz Spy]

• Australian Vogue's September cover is out, and it features a stunning illustration of Cate Blanchett. [WWD]
• Meanwhile, Fashion Week Daily is reporting on a rumor that Victoria Beckham might be American Vogue's October cover model. [FWD]

• The Kanye West-Gap intern story is back, this time as written in the Chicago Tribune. But no sources are named — doubly so where the rumor-within-a-rumor that West is looking to launch a clothing line with the retailer is concerned. But it would be so perfect! Amber Rose could model it. [ChicagoTrib]
• Jessica Simpson, on her new lingerie line, produced by a licensee of a licensee: "Of course I love lingerie. What girl doesn't? My lingerie reflects the way I'm feeling when I wake up and helps me set the tone for my day." [WWD]
• Takashi Murakami for Louis Vuitton stuffed animals: no celebrity artist megabrand collaboration should ever be this goddamned cute. [FWD]
• French street style photographer Garance Doré has a new gig expanding her blogging coverage for Paris Vogue. [WWD]
• Balenciaga returned to Jennifer Connelly for its fall ads — and then had Steven Meisel photograph her very awkwardly. [SassyBella]
• Jean-Paul Gaultier, for his part, booked Raquel Zimmerman and Raquel Zimmerman for his fall campaign. Raquel Zimmerman plays the girl role and the boy role and looks mighty good doing it. [FWD]
• Gaultier's collaboration with Doc Martens — available only in France, hélas — features boots with perforated leather in a grid. And, as Fashionista points out, you could totally make a DIY version. [Fashionista]
• Roberto Cavalli's house involves significantly less leopard print than we might have imagined. [The Moment]
• Naomi Campbell may have attacked a paparazzo with her handbag on holiday in Sicily. [Daily Mail]
• Designer Paul Smith, on photographing his own ad campaigns: "The whole idea of a designer doing photographs is sort of pretentious: ‘I do everything, you know.' Like Karl whatshisname. I'm a snapper, not a photographer. I'm not Mario Testino. But my lot have been saying, ‘You take pictures; you do it.' So I thought, ‘Let's have a go.' My creative director and the marketing guy and the press people are all pleased with them." [ToL]
• Amber le Bon is to be featured in an upcoming issue of (British?) Vogue wearing her mother Yasmin's vintage clothes. [Daily Mail]
• Late on Friday, fashion writer Diane Pernet published an e-mail exchange between the stylist for "a well-known singer of color" and a PR representative for designer Alexander Wang; the PR was denying the singer's request to wear Alexander Wang clothing, and when the stylist wrote back intimating that the denial was based on her client's race, the PR seemed to agree, and said she was quitting her job. Although Blackbook originally reported on the story, both it and Pernet have pulled their posts about it — did Wang threaten legal action? — but Blackbook's Facebook note publicizing its post is still visible, and Homo Neurotic has reprinted the full text of the e-mails. [Facebook and Homo Neurotic]
• You can now count Yves Saint Laurent designer Stefano Pilati among the thundering horde descending on London Fashion Week in September. Pilati will be in attendance because of his mentor relationship with the label Veryta. [Vogue UK]
• The fashion industry's huge waste is a serious environmental hazard in the third world countries where most of our clothing is made. [UPI]
• A particular jean factory in Lesotho, which produces denim items for the Gap and Levi's, exposed locals to burns and chest infections because of its toxic fumes. [CBS]
• Juicy Couture's higher-priced line, Bird, is now hitting stores. Anyone who had her eye on Rachel Zoe's recommended leather leggings, now is your time. [LATimes]
• Emma Watson, despite her professed abhorrence of celebrity clothing lines, is rumored to be in the process of launching one with the London fair trade organic brand People Tree. There's a Mischa Barton coke joke in here somewhere. [Daily Mail]
• New York is still an attractive place for overseas tourists to go shopping, since the dollar is slightly lower again. London, where the exchange rate has only recently become more favorable, has seen a 4.7% increase in retail sales over last year for the month of June. [WWD]
• Astoundingly, teenagers in America are spending on average 14% less on clothes than they were last year. [NYTimes]
• Christian Dior's profits were down 27%, to $943 million, in the first six months of this year. [WWD]
• A collage of snippets of fabric used in the late Princess Diana's wedding dress is available on eBay for £15,500, if anyone wants it. [Daily Express]
• 13,300 Burlington Coat Factory boys' hooded sweatshirts are being recalled because their cords pose a strangulation risk. [UPI]

• Jon Gosselin said accusations made by Kevin and Jodi Kreider (Kate's brother and his wife) that his kids are overworked are absurd. He questioned the Kreider's credibility on the matter saying, "They were only in seasons one and two, anyway."

• Jon explained: "My kids probably film an hour and half to two hours a day and we only film three days a week... For Kevin and Jodi to go out there and say were filming eight hours a day and it's hard core, that's ridiculous." [Radar Online]
• Jessica Simpson is spending a ton of money to look good on her new show The Price of Beauty. "To get her camera-ready each episode will cost $25,000. She insists on using her own hair, makeup and fashion stylists, who are more expensive than J.Lo's." says a source. [The Daily Express]
• A source says Jessica Simpson is "bummed" about her split from Tony Romo, but it's for the best because, "[Tony] wanted her to be a house mom and be in Dallas, and he wants to go out and play – and not just football." The source adds, "Tony had his eyes on everyone but her towards the end... But let's not forget they lasted for a long time and he stuck with her even though the fans didn't like her." Should we really give Tony a medal for not dumping Jess when strangers complained about her? [People]
• Jessica Simpson Tweeted: "My godson Dylan giving me a hug after hitting me in the back with my louboutin leopard wedges." [Us]
• Kevin Federline is in Las Vegas filming scenes for a VH1 reality show about his life as a father of four, which hasn't officially been picked up. "He has been through a lot over the years, but handled himself very well. He's learned how to balance being a super single dad and the chaotic life of business, fame and fortune," says a source. "He strives to be a good father." [People]
• Kevin Federline was ordered to lose 45 pounds for the show. "Victoria Prince is supposed to have a big part in the show,"" said a source. They're billing her as Kevin's new Britney." [Radar Online]
• Marie Osmond will not be returning to TV this fall in a syndicated talk show. An executive at who works at the show's distributor said, "Our belief in Marie's creative vision for a new kind of talk show is unshakable, but in the end, the marketplace this year was simply unyielding." [Variety]
• Two Ohio police chiefs and a local mayor's son were arraigned on 10 felony charges, including burglary and tampering with evidence, related to a break in at the home of Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate. They plead no guilty to all charges. [E!]
• A lawyer for Dr. Allan Metzger, Michael Jackson's former doctor, says he warned Michael abotu Propofol in April. "Jackson was looking for propofol and Dr. Metzger turned him down and advised him how dangerous it was," says the lawyer. "Apparently, Jackson was shopping around for the drug or looking for someone to administer it to him." [People]
• Eminem makes fun of Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon in his new song "The Warning," but Nick says he's planning his next move. He Tweeted: "This ain't checkers. This is chess." Eminem must be so scared! [Perez Hilton]
• About 100 people attended the funeral of American Idol contestant Alexis Cohen last weekend in New Jersey. "I was shocked, stunned and mortified when I found out," said her ex-boyfriend James Kern, adding, "I can understand people having sympathy for the guy [who hit Alexis], but I hope he gets what he deserves, [People]
• Though Perez Hilton posted what looked like legal papers from Carrie Prejean suing the Miss California USA Organization for firing her, she says the papers were unsigned and unfiled. She said she doesn't intend to sue, but, "There's definitely some things that are false that they've said about me and I think definitely the book will - it's sort of like therapy for me. It's a way for me to just get out the truth, really. [Access Hollywood]
• A source says Reggie Bush broke up with Kim Kardashian because, "Reggie saw text messages on Kim's phone from Kanye West and flipped out on her... The texts referenced a night they hung out, how much fun he had, how hot Kim was, and more racy things that got Reggie's imagination running." [Fox News]
• The Chicago Bomb and Arson Unit investigated a suspicious backpack with wires hanging out of it that was found in a flowerbed outside of Oprah's TV studio this morning. After conducting tests they determined it wasn't a bomb. [TMZ]
• Design firm Delete is accusing Jane Fonda of stealing because her newly redesigned website looks almost exactly like theirs. [Media Bistro]
• Here's a video of an interview with Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and other stars of New Moon. Kristen and Rob are sitting next to each other, so clearly they're in love. [Pop Sugar]
• Dave Grohl's hometown of Warren, Ohio is naming a street after him. He'll appear at the town's naming ceremony to christen "Dave Grohl Alley." [Rolling Stone]
• OMG: Tyra Banks will appear on an upcoming episode of Gossip Girl. [People]
• Sebastian Stan says of dating Leighton Meester, "I'm a really lucky guy. She's the most interesting, sophisticated, talented and an extremely funny person that I know. She's really hilarious." He added that her kissing scenes on Gossip Girl don't bother him because, "The good part is I get to go home with her." [People]
• Penn Badgley and Chace Crawford ran into each other at Crate and Barrel, while they were both shopping with thier moms. Crawford says, "He was with his mom shopping for his new place, too... It was really funny. I was like, 'What are we doing here, man?' And he's like, ‘I don't know. Right now it looks like we came together with our moms to Crate and Barrel. What's going on?' It was embarrassing." [People]
• Jeff Fahey, the helicopter pilot from Lost is in a House of Representatives meeting for some reason. [Politico]
• RHONY's Bethenny Frankel continued her blog on E! today, writing about last night's premiere of RHOA. She writes: "I am so excited. Atlanta is by far my favorite Housewife outlet (including my own). It is so decadent, so juicy, such a ripe, sweet Georgia peach, and as is always the case with peach season, I never want it to end." [E!]
• RHOA's Kim Zolciak has filed a police report against NeNe Leakes, who Kim claims strangled her during a fight. [Entertainment Tonight]
• When asked why he's going to do stand-up again just seven months after having open heart surgery, Robin Williams joked, "I realized I was running out of merchandising money from Bicentennial Man." [People]
• Usher says mentoring at the Boys and Girls Club, "makes me a better man. It makes me a better individual... There's a difference between hard work and heart work, and this would represent heart work." [CNN]
• Christina Aguilera is working on her new record in a studio in her backyard. She says, "it just has been so perfect for me to just wake up in the morning, put on my flip-flops and sweat pants, and just go back in the studio and pretty much get into my creative cave and zone out that way, so it's been really convenient. So the paparazzi have probably been upset with me. I know they told my husband - they're like, 'Is she ever going to leave the house?'"[The Daily Express]
• Melissa Auf Der Maur says to ignore Courtney Love's announcements about a Hole reunion. She says, "My loyalty to the legacy of Hole is eternal. But there is no reunion mapped out at this point. I liked the idea of singing with her again, so I said yes, but no singing has happened and I am not aware of any plans for it. I have nothing to do with, and know nothing about, the legal beagle name game. It is true that Courtney and I have been in touch for the first time in a decade, in the context of female humans with significant history of sisterhood. We both love music and magic and are reconnecting because it's been too long." [The Daily Express]
• Chelsea Handler is upset her show wasn't mentioned in GLADD's report on the state of homosexuals on TV. "I can't speak for the rest of the network, but at Chelsea Lately, we're knocking it out of the park. We've hit a homo run," she said. "We always talk about gay issues and [sidekick] Chuy and I were king and queen of the Gay Pride Parade." She then pointed to various members of her staff she claimed were "the biggest gay in captivity" and "transitioning from albino man to albino woman," and said, "I'll be expecting an apology, which I assume will be on some hermaphrodite's stationery." [E!]
• Uma Thurman says, "The only thing that's more ridiculous than the film industry's obsession with eternal youth is trying to look ten years younger than yourself. I think it's very good to look healthy. I feel very happy to look healthy – but I don't want to live a tortured life of neurosis about it all." She adds that being pretty when you're young isn't all it's cracked up to be: "You know, it's like: ‘You're pretty, be quiet.' Pretty girls get self-conscious because they're constantly getting comments about how they look and they end up getting very shy or actually awkward. Even if they feel big about it – it sort of closes them down." [The Times of London]
• "I don't feel pressure to alter my appearance in any way, but being a girl, the media is more interested in what I choose to wear. People care about what I put on my body, which is strange." — Emma Watson [Ok]
• Satirical website Scrape.TV posted a fake story about Kanye West declaring himself the King of Pop now that Michael Jackson is dead. Unfortunately, other news outlets ran the article without realizing it was a joke. Kanye denied the story on his blog writing, "IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD THAT OBVIOUSLY I MADE PEOPLE FEEL THAT I WOULD BE CORNY ENOUGH TO SAY SOMETHING SO WHACK AFTER THE PASSING OF AN IDOL, A LEGEND AND MORE THAN THAT A HUMAN BEING WITH FEELINGS AND FAMILY.... I DON'T TALK TO PRESS OR DO TV OR DO PROMOTIONS OF ANY SORT. I'VE STOPPED CHASING AND BUYING INTO FAME. FAME IS LIKE CIGARETTES WITH NO SURGEON GENERAL WARNING. IT DESTROYS MOST PEOPLE AS IT DID TO THE TRUE AND ONLY KING OF POP. WE EXPLOIT OURSELVES AND EAT OUR OWN EGOS 'TILL THERE IS NOTHING LEFT. I HAVE A FEELING THAT THIS WON'T BE THE LAST FALSE STATEMENT WITH MY NAME ON IT, BUT THIS WILL BE THE LAST TIME I DEFEND MYSELF. I'M DONE." [Rolling Stone]

• Jude Law got someone pregnant, but not Rachel McAdams' sister Kayleen — her rep (she's a makeup artist) says "She has never even met him." [Star]
• So. The mother of Jude Law's unborn spawn is:

Samantha Burke. She's an actress/model. Naturally. [TMZ]

• A source says that Samantha Burke wants Jude's cash! She expects "a large maintenance payment and financial costs, including a percentage of Jude's future earnings, agreed in writing." [The Sun]
• According to this report, Samantha Burke is from a wealthy family. Also, she looks good in a retro swimsuit. [Daily Mail]
• "Even Seth Rogen Now Hating on Katherine Heigl." He's talking shit about how she talks shit. And dissed The Ugly Truth: "That [movie] looks like it really puts women on a pedestal in a beautiful way." Plus: "I gotta say, it's not like we're the only people she said some batshit crazy things about. That's kind of her bag now." [NY Mag, LA Times]
• Carrie Prejean is planning to sue the Miss California USA organization for slander, libel, public disclosure of private facts, religious discrimination, intentional infliction of emotional distress and negligent infliction of emotional distress. This should be a big old mess. [Perez]
• Need beach reading? Three celebs have "written" new memoirs: Slumdog Millionaire's Rubina Ali; former Playmate Kendra Wilkinson and Good Charlotte's Joel Madden. [NY Daily News]
• Haterade Headline of the Day: "Tony Romo and Nick Lachey rebound with Jessica Simpson look-a-likes while she's left smooching a dog." [NY Daily News]
• Police chiefs suspected of "snooping" at Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate's home have been arrested. [NY Post]
• Emma Watson is related to a 16th century witch! Her distant relative Joan Playle was excommunicated from the Church of England for witchcraft in 1592. [E!]
• Eminem's new track, "Warning," is an answer to Mariah Carey's song, "Obsessed." He raps: "You probably think since it's been so long if I had something on you I woulda did it by now, on the contrary, Mary Poppins, I'm mixing our studio session down and sending it to mastering to make it loud, enough dirt on you to murder you, this is what the fuck I do... Mariah, it ever occur to you that I still have pictures?" [Yahoo News via E!]
• Amy Winehouse's wedding album: Found in trash. Seems Blaaaaake threw his copy away. [The Sun]
• Nora Ephron says she hopes Julie & Julia will remind everyone that before EVOO, there was BUTTER, which has now been demonized. "I just do not get that at all," Ephron says, since Julia Child and her husband lived into their 90s. "And they drank like fish," she says. "I don't believe that anything has to do with what you eat, if you don't overeat. All these people who think they can cut down on their cholesterol by eating those awful egg-white omelets. There's something I really hate. It is simply not going to make any difference if you have a couple egg yolks in your omelet." [USA Today]
• Will Katie Holmes be in the Sex And The City 2: Electric Boogaloo? A source says: "The character they want her to play is a really ballsy, high-powered company executive who tangles with Samantha." Sometimes you sort of forget she's an actress, for Xenu's sake. [The Sun]
• Jeepin' jeewillickers! Even though Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar named each of their 18 children a name beginning with the letter J, their first grandchild (from son Josh) will be named Mackenzie. Whether Josh and his wife will have 18 kids with M names remains to be seen. [Star]
• So much sadness: This report claims that Michael Jackson may have had collapsed veins and needle marks all over his body — plus — he may have been dead as early as 8:30 a.m. — four hours before paramedics were called. [ET]
• Warrants filed yesterday allege that Michael Jackson was an addict. It's a violation if Dr. Conrad Murray was "prescribing to an addict." [Yahoo News via AP]
• The Michael Jackson autopsy report: Delayed. [TMZ]
• How will TLC balance Jon & Kate's popularity with the family's right for privacy? Network exec Eileen O'Neill says: "It's a sensitive situation and we navigate that as we go along… It's the family's decision to be involved in the show… We want to stay with them as long as they want to stay with us." [Variety]
• What you'll see when Jon & Kate Plus 8 returns: "Jon and Kate have never said they were perfect," Eileen O'Neill says. "You're still going to see two parents that love their kids, but you'll see them parenting separately." [People]
• This columnist asserts that the return of Jon & Kate will help Kate's image. [MSNBC Scoop]
• And, because no one is sick of these people: Jon Gosselin (and Michael Lohan??) brainstormed a new show: Divorced Dads Club. [Page Six]
• Leonardo DiCaprio's ex, Bar Refaeli, has a new man: multi-millionaire Teddy Sagi, who is among Israel's top 30 richest men. [NY Daily News]
• BREAKING: Katy Perry and Rihanna have become inseparable. [Page Six]
• Mario Lopez says the Saved By The Bell reunion was a long time coming: "Everybody knew the 20-year anniversary was coming up. This People story has been in the works for over a year, long before [late night host] Jimmy Fallon started talking about it. We were all excited about it." But what's next? "Everybody is fired up. People keep coming up to me saying 'When are you guys going to do a show?'" [People]
• Mark Paul Gosselaar says of Dustin "Screech" Diamond: That's a disaster on so many levels… I don't know where his head is. I know probably as much as you know from watching things on TV." Plus, Gosselaar says that when he played Zack on Fallon last month, there was a reason he looked young: "I read a blog [where] some guy said, 'Dude, lay off the Botox.' I've never had Botox before. The wig was so fucking tight, it gave me a mini face-lift." [Newsweek]
• Penelope Cruz looked amazing at the premiere of Broken Embraces, but the airline had lost her luggage. [People]
• Penny Cruz: "I love London... but I have difficulties with the rainy weather." [Telegraph]
• Lost spoilers! CHARLIE. [E!]
• Details of the sort-of Seinfeld reunion on Curb Your Enthusiasm, at the link. [LA Times]
• Lawyers are getting involved in that Twilight recasting drama involving Rachelle Lefevre. [E!]
• Viva la revolucion? Benicio del Toro, Bill Murray, Robert Duvall and James Caan were in Cuba yesterday. [Reuters]
• Paul Giamatti calls some scenes from his new film, Cold Souls, "sort of awkward and painful." [WSJ]
• Billy Crudup will join the cast of Eat, Pray, Love the movie, which also stars Julia Roberts, Javier Bardem and Richard Jenkins. [Variety]
• "Bandslam's account of a teenager's awkward attempts to settle into a new school remind former Friends star Lisa Kudrow of her own adolescence." [Telegraph]
• "Singer Peter Andre has accepted "substantial" damages over a newspaper claim he was unfaithful to his estranged wife, model Katie Price." [BBC News]
• "I really felt this film, which had a love affair with boeuf bourguignon, should come out in winter." — Meryl Streep on Julie & Julia. [USA Today]
• "I heard what he had to say and I knew at this moment my life would never be the same. Life no longer seemed like a series of Random events. I also began to see that being Rich and Famous wasn't going to bring me lasting fulfillment and that it was not the end of the journey." — Madonna, on first hearing about Kabbalah when pregnant with Lourdes. [AP]
• "Phoebe was so spiritual and 'out there' — and I wasn't at all. Not. At. All. If anyone was it was Jennifer [Aniston]. She introduced me to certain books that gave me an insight into that world – Phoebe's supposed world – which was a more spiritual realm." — Lisa Kudrow. [Daily Express]
• "My mom and dad were big hippies and I spent time on communes. I just remember the smell of soybeans everywhere. People were making all sorts of strange things out of soybeans: food, clothing, paper, everything. I suppose if I'd gone to military school, maybe I'd be pining for something like Woodstock. But I'm certainly pining for what it represents, and I think that's what Ang was really after with the film." — Liev Schreiber, on Taking Woodstock. [Style.com]
• "I don't watch Jon & Kate, but I still want to punch that Jon douche in the face.his smarmy,fat alcoholic bloat&Ed Hardy wear piss me off" — Rose McGowan. [Twitter]
• "The Jay-Z controversy is great. We couldn't buy P.R. like this. I think Jay-Z said he saw Auto-Tune used in a Wendy's commercial, and that pushed him over the edge." — Marco Alpert, vice president of the company which markets Auto-Tune, on Jay-Z's latest single, "D.O.A. (Death of Auto-Tune)." [NY Times]
• "Fuck you Katy Perry, you fucking stupid, maybe 'not good for the gays,' title thieving, haven't heard much else, so not quite sure if you're talented, fucking little slut." — Jill Sobule. [The Rumpus]

• According to this report, Samantha Ronson went out with Sopranos actress Drea De Matteo last night, got into a fight with Lindsay Lohan about it, and threw LL's clothes out into the street.

Can't really tell if the supposedly illustrative pictures at the link actually reflect that, but whatever. [Daily Mail]

• Oy: Rumor has it that Kevin Federline is working with VH1 on a new reality show costarring his girlfriend, Victoria Prince, and his kids, Sean Preston and Jayden James. Just what the world needs. [E!]
• Meanwhile, Britney's conservatorship might be coming to an end, when her tour winds down in November. She seems like she's doing pretty good, no? [TMZ]
• Mischa Barton's model-centric CW show, The Beautiful Life, will go on with or without her — which means that producers are casting a new recurring character as a Plan B., in case Mischa is not ready for filming the last week of July. [EW]
• Madonna is in Marseilles, where she visited with the victims of the stage collapse which left two dead. She met with the widow of a worker and also went to the hospital where eight injured workers are being treated. [Daily Mail]
• Burn Notice actor Jeffrey Donovan was arrested for DUI in Miami Beach. Nice stubble in the mug shot. [NY Daily News]
• Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman were seen hanging out in an upstate New York park, and "They kept stopping to make out - and they made out a lot." [Gatecrasher]
• The reporter Jon Gosselin had dinner with over the weekend often "uses her charms" to get stories, and sometimes wears wigs when she follows celebrities, so as not to be recognized. [Page Six]
• "Are Kate Gosselin and Madonna workout buddies? The Jon & Kate star has arms that mirror Madge's." [NY Daily News]
• It's official: Emma Watson will attend Brown University in the fall. [People]
• Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy: Engaged! [Page Six]
• When Heidi Klum was followed by paparazzi as she took her kids to a NYC park last week, it was other parents at the park who were pissed: They asked the snappers to leave, and when the photographers didn't, the moms and dads threw water balloons at them. [Daily Express]
• Sienna Miller has seen her GI Joe action figure, and she is not impressed. "My doll is cross-eyed and has the biggest chin you have ever seen. Action figures are always a bit off, aren't they? Oddly enough from side on, it is definitely me but front on she looks sort of possessed." [The Sun]
• Here's a video of Katherine Heigl talking about T.R. Knight going to do Broadway now that he's not on Grey's Anatomy: "That really pisses me off," she says. [E!]
• David Beckham's coach is criticizing the player for confronting jeering fans at the first home game of the season: "We appreciate our players and fans passion for the team and the game, but we all must aim to hold ourselves to higher standards." [Mirror]
• Amy Winehouse's mom says the star is on the road to recovery: "A year ago, everyone was saying: 'Will she get through this, will she even survive?' And look at her now. We've got the old Amy back. I always knew she'd come through it. And I know she doesn't want to go back to the drugs. St Lucia was good in many ways because there were no hard drugs around, but she was bored, so she drank…She's put on a bit of weight and looks better than she has in a long time… She was busy cooking, so that's a good sign that she's actually eating. I think she's pleased to be home and I know she's happier now." [Mirror]
• Bonnie Somerville played Suzie Cavandish in Labor Pains, and she says of Lindsay Lohan: "She is supertalented. I had a great time working with her." [E!]
• A balloon company sent Jennifer Lopez a giant bouquet of balloons for her twins, which she promptly sent back. Maybe the colorful arrangement was not classy enough for Jenny from the block? [TMZ]
• Re: Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson: A source says: "Tony pulled the plug because he couldn't stand the constant heat Jessica was putting on him to get married… The final nail in the coffin was an argument they had over how to celebrate Jessica's birthday. She wanted a splashy Ken & Barbie-themed bash with all of her celebrity friends, and Tony wanted a quiet, low-key dinner for just the two of them." [MSNBC via National Enquirer]
• Susan Boyle will appear in an interview on the Today show tomorrow, in which she says of sudden fame: "The impact, like a demolition ball. You know, and anyone who has that kind of impact — finds it really hard to get a head around it. I guess I had to get my head around it, but through the — the guidance of a great team, and they are very good, I was able to see that in perspective and really turn that around a little." [Reuters]
• "Harry Potter's love interest rivals Emma Watson in fashion stakes… Emma Watson finally has competition as the most glamourous Harry Potter screen siren after Bonnie Wright who plays Ginny Weasley was photographed looking equally spellbinding." [Telegraph]
• Mark Lester, godfather of Michael Jackson's children, claims that after the memorial service, 7-year-old Blanket Jackson seemed confused about what was going on. "It is obvious to me that Blanket is still unsure about what exactly happened to his father.He said, 'Where's Daddy gone? On holiday?' It was a rhetorical question and it broke my heart." [Mirror]
• The Jackson family is still "agonizing" over the decision of where to bury the King of Pop, but his body is "temporarily interred" at Forest Lawn Memorial-Park and Mortuary in Los Angeles. [People]
• Joe Jackson was on Larry King Live, where he seemed to blame Dr. Conrad Murray for Michael Jackson's death: "The doctor gave him something to make him rest, and then he don't wake up no more. Something is wrong there," Joe said. [AP]
• Another report claiming that Katherine Jackson is being manipulated to dispute Michael's will. [TMZ]
• Joe Jackson says the rumor that he wants to take Michael's kids on tour as the Jackson 3 is "a bunch of jive." And when asked if he was abusive to Michael when he was a kid, he said: "That's a bunch of bull S." [CNN]
• August 29 would have been Michael Jackson's 51st birthday, and there may be two tribute concerts at London's O2 Arena in August to celebrate. [TMZ]
• Russell Brand. Goat farming. [RussellBrand.TV]
• Ciara is on the cover of Social Life magazine, but she skipped the party for the isue in East Hampton because she had a chance to go into the studio with Justin Timberlake. Social Life editor Devorah Rose has a much lengthier explanation, which you can read at the link if you wish. [Observer]
• There was some chaos at Chace Crawford's birthday party because the prettyboy didn't want to pose for photos. What the hell are we going to paste in our scrapbooks, hmm? [Page Six]
• Will Lizzie Grubman be on Real Housewives Of New York? Short answer: No. [Page Six]
• Jorja Fox: Returning to CSI. [UPI]
• Nicolas Cage is in talks to play the villain in The Green Hornet. Cameron Diaz is negotiating to play a reporter and love interest; Seth Rogen will star. [Variety]
• Uma Thurman will star in Girl Soldier, an indie film about a cleric who helped rescue 140 schoolgirls abducted in Uganda. [Variety]
• "Tyler Perry is paying for 65 children from a Philadelphia day camp to go to Walt Disney World after reading about allegations that a suburban swim club had shunned them because of racism." [AP]
• Ryan O'Neal says he is dealing with Farrah Fawcett's death by answering condolence notes from her fans. [UPI]
• Ryan O'Neal is also spilling about what Redmond O'Neal's last words were to his mother Farrah Fawcett on her death bed, which is maybe a little too intimate. [People]
• Marissa Jaret Winokur is still blogging her "weight-loss journey," although this week, it's "I Fell Off the Diet Wagon." Tons and tons of candy, thanks to her son's first birthday party. [People]
• Jamie Waylett, who plays Vincent Crabbe in the Harry Potter movies, has been ordered to do 120 hours of community service after admitting to growing 10 cannabis plants at his mother's house. [Daily Mail]
• "Bruce Lee's older sister and younger brother have authorized a Chinese company to make a series of biographical films about the late kung fu icon, saying they want to produce a historically accurate account of their brother's life." [AP]
• Whatshisname says he and Whatshername don't let the kids see them fight. [Mirror]
• Whatshisname fell off a stage, btw. [Daily Mail]
• Blind item! "Which indie starlet secretly has a house decorated entirely with Alice in Wonderland paraphernelia?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I would daydream about it all the time. I thought about the fact that there were children who didn't have anything, and I felt like I could help. It was something that weighed on me. It was something I did for the world and for my son and then for me." — Mary Louise Parker always knew she would adopt someday. [People]
• "It was fun. It was a new experience for me just to take my clothes off on camera. So to be able to scream, to be hysterical, to act out all that suffering and all those tears… well, it's not something you get to do every day." — Charlotte Gainsbourg, on controversial and violent film Antichrist. [Telegraph]
• "I'd like to go on record that he is a gentleman. He has not touched me in a bad place once." — Judd Apatow, on Russell Brand. [Mirror]
• "It's a coincidence. It's from a book called Once is Not Enough by Jacqueline Susann. Bad book… People think that I changed my name. I could've been an actress, a superhero, or a stripper." — January Jones, on her name and being born in January. Also, click to see her on the cover of Interview! [JustJared via Interview]
• "The double-edged sword of working with family is it can be the most fulfilling experience you've ever had, but the flip side is it can also be the most tortuous and most stressful, because it's your family and the lines can get blurry." — Shaun Cassidy, who, along with brothers Ryan, David and Patrick, is starring in a new ABC Family show, Ruby & The Rockits. [LA Times]
• "Stand-up is good when you're rolling. When it goes down you feel like 'why the hell did I come here?' and the same thing in acting. If it's not clicking you feel like an ass." — Adam Sandler. [Mirror]
• "This project was rife with opportunities for me to fuck it up enormously and, by doing so, prove my own limitations. To botch the whole thing would have been calamitous." — Hugh Dancy, on Adam, the film about a man with Asperger's. [BlackBook]
• "I see a lot myself in him, he is a Cancer, just like I am. I would love to meet him. He makes me smile just when I see him." — Lil' Kim on Nelson Mandela. [Mirror]

• According to this report, Mischa Barton was taken from her home last week because she was so high on coke friends were afraid she was going to kill herself. [NY Post]

• A source says of Mischa Barton: "She is a mess. She is a suicidal, uninsurable mess." [The Sun]
• Madonna has visited the family of a worker killed in a stage collapse in France and will meet with three other people hurt in the accident. [UPI]
• Someone stole three boxes of clothing from L.A. stylist Jennifer Rade Thursday night. Who was Rade's client? Who was she collecting dresses for? Angelina Jolie. [Page Six]
• "Single Jessica Simpson Keeps A Low Profile." You mean she's not running around in circles chirping "I'm single! I'm single!"? Huh. [People]
• Nick Lachey says there is no truth to the rumor that he and Jessica Simpson might reunite: "I haven't talked to her in probably two years," Nick says. "I wish her happiness. That's where it pretty much ends." [People]
• Prince was spotted on a first class flight from Minneapolis to La Guardia. He was reading Elle magazine, carrying a gold- and diamond-encrusted walking stick and wearing flip-flops with sparkly silver socks. Whoever spotted him has pretty much had the best day of his or her life and it's all downhill from here. [Page Six]
• Gwyneth Paltrow: "Furious" that Scarlett Johansson is upstaging her. See, ScarJo is on the new Iron Man 2 cover of Entertainment Weekly, and in the new publicity shots; Gwynnie is not. [The Sun]
• David Beckham played his first home game with the L.A. Galaxy this year — and was booed by haters. One fan jumped over some seats to confront Beckham and ended up getting arrested. [AP]
• When we saw this Jean-Charles de Castelbajac ensemble, we were like, who the hell would wear that? Well, the answer, of course, is: Lady Gaga. [BuzzFeed]
• Kate Gosselin and the kids were in New York on Saturday to do a photo shoot for TLC; there was some kind of kerfluffle between security guards outside of the photo studio and paparazzi — the guards used umbrellas, styrofoam boards and folding tables to keep the snappers back; the kids had to be hustled into the studio. "It must have been very upsetting for the kids," says one observer. [People]
• Jon Gosselin's girlfriend Hailey Glassman went to fat camp before college, but would cheat by going to Panda Express. Apparently this was before her alleged "coke diet." [Perez]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin have been split up and living separately since last year, and Jon didn't start dating until after the divorce. [People]
• Wait, what? Jon Gosselin is dating a Star magazine reporter named Kate Major? [Gatecrasher]
• Concert promoter AEG is auctioning off the rights to the rehearsal footage of Michael Jackson's "This Is It" tour, and no Jackson family members are involved in the sale. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Looks like Sony Pictures is close to closing a deal to make a feature film out of the Michael Jackson rehearsal footage. [Variety]
• La Toya Jackson penned a "tribute single" after her brother's death and it will be available on iTunes on July 28. [Mirror]
• TMZ reported that Jermaine, Tito and Jackie Jackson would be performing at the Jamaican Reggae Summerfest. But Jermaine says: "TMZ needs to get their facts straight. We're not going to Jamaica." [E!]
• Tito Jackson seems to blame Dr. Conrad Murray for Michael Jackson's death, saying: "My opinion is that he panicked when my brother didn't wake up… He did have a pulse but he couldn't bring him back. I don't know what the time lapse was between the doctor finding him and when he called paramedics. But I believe if he had immediately called for help we might still have my brother here today, he would definitely still be alive." [Mirror]
• An anonymous senior law enforcement official says there will not be a murder charge in the Michael Jackson case. [UPI]
• Is Katherine Jackson trying to object to the executors named in Michael Jackson's will? And if so, why? There's a "no contest" clause in the will, meaning anyone who files objections to the will automatically gets no money. Is she being manipulated… by Joe? [TMZ]
• This report claims that Janet Jackson has offered to raise Michael's children, and loves them like they are her own. [The Sun]
• Russell Crowe is a hero! No, really: He helped out "a real-life damsel in distress" on the set of his new Robin Hood film. A crew member's car went up in flames when she was on her way to work. She told her colleagues about her scary experience, and Russell made a joke about it — but then ended up giving her enough cash to buy a new car. [Mirror, NY Daily News]
• Paula Abdul does not have a new contract to appear on American Idol for another season, which is probably more of a publicity stunt than an actual possibility that she won't return to the show. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Nevertheless, there's a #keeppaula Twitter trend. [LA Times]
• One reason Paula Abdul might not have a contract: She's holding out for more money. Apparently she makes around $2.5 mil a year, compared to the $15 a year Ryan Seacrest gets. [TMZ]
• Gossip Girls Michelle Trachtenberg and Jessica Szohr, as well as Rumer Willis, Ali Lohan and Stephanie Pratt attended a Charlotte Russe event in NYC last week, where a model playing air guitar almost hit a waiter in the head. [WWD]
• 50 Cent has been trying to sell his is giant mansion in Connecticut — the one that used to belong to Mike Tyson — which has 19 bedrooms, 37 bathrooms and a club with stripper poles. He's knocked about $4 million off the price, so if you have $10.9 million, it's all yours. [The Sun, Hartford Courant]
• Emma Thompson is looking frumpy and old-fashioned: She's filming Nanny McPhee 2! [Daily Mail]
• Jon Stewart has sent Daily Show DVDs to a 32-year-old man with leukemia and has offered to give the guy a tour of the set. [UPI]
• When Kylie Minogue and Spanish beau Andres Velencoso were arguing in a NYC club last week, he pulled out a camera and photographed her while she was upset. A source says: "He's making a collage of Kylie and has already got three albums full of photos of her, which he hopes to publish some day." [Daily Express]
• A source says of John Mayer: "Several years ago when he was dating Jessica Simpson, he couldn't go to her birthday party because he was on tour. So the night of her birthday she had dinner with [hairdresser] Ken Paves and a few friends. Everyone thought John would forget her birthday, but then a gift arrived from him — it was a DVD of him in concert. Jessica spent the rest of the night watching the DVD on a loop, 'being with him.' It was so sad." [Page Six]
• Zzzz: Peaches Geldof fell asleep during a TV interview with Fearne Cotton. [The Sun]
• "Kim Cattrall and toy boy split because he 'refused to be a kept man'" [Daily Mail]
• Jay-Z sips white wine as he is interviewed about The Blueprint 3, his 11th studio album, due in September — eight years to the day after the debut of the original Blueprint. "I wanted to bring it full circle," he says. "The first Blueprint was based on soul samples and more of a place where I came from and the records I listened to growing up with my mom and pop. This Blueprint, I liken it to a new classic, simply because we — Usher, Justin Timberlake, Beyonce, myself — are becoming the people that we looked up to musically growing up, like Marvin Gaye and Frank Sinatra." [Reuters]
• "Sienna Miller: 'I nearly burnt my breasts making GI Joe.'" [Daily Mail]
• Morgan Freeman is in talks to star with Bruce Willis in Red, based on the WildStorm/DC Comic. [Variety]
• Singer Christina Milian and producer/singer The Dream: Engaged. [NY Daily News]
• Click the link if you'd like to see video of Willem Dafoe talking about Lars von Trier's controversial thriller Antichrist. You know, the one where Charlotte Gainsbourg takes a blunt object to Dafoe's [ genitalia? [Guardian]
• Dazed Digital: There's a lot of nudity in the film so, I have to ask, is that actually your…
  Willem Dafoe: … Penis? No, it's not mine. Lars used a porn actor for those scenes. It was a good decision because, if it was me, then that's all that people would talk about. Obviously Lars wants the characters to have genitals but it would become a distraction: ‘Oh, they really had sex!' If he had asked me to do it, I don't know what I would have said. [Dazed Digital]
• Once, David Byrne almost hit Paris Hilton with his bike. [Page Six]
• RIP Frank McCourt. [NY Daily News]
• Blind item! "Which troubled starlet got her first big break on TV by sending the producer a tape of herself having sex with another girl? The producer thought the ploy was so original, he cast her instead of dozens of other ingénues." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which perennial bachelor princeling should be more careful? While His Serene Highness was cavorting on a yacht in the Mediterranean with a hunky guy, he thought the servants on board would keep their mouths shut. He was wrong." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which creepy dude and his posse of pals take photos of their overnight lady guests while the women are sleeping and tack them up on a 'Wall of Shame' afterward?" [Gatecrasher]
• "He put my son to shame! I provided my son with the best martial artists in the world, and he could not be persuaded to try it. In just two months, Jaden had learned so much. He is truly a talented boy." — Jackie Chan says Will Smith's son, who will star in Kung Fu Kid, is better at martial arts than his own son. [NY Daily News]
• "Anderson was just amazing. He said that the seven most horrifying words you can hear from a mother are, 'I'm going to write an erotic novel.' But he's fine with it, and of course I gave it to him before I even sent it off." — Gloria Vanderbilt, on her new book. The 85-year-old also says: "I think it's a work of art. The age of the artist is not what we're talking about. I mean, it's as if you looked at a painting and said, How old was the person that painted this? You really don't think in those terms." [Time]
• "When I started out, I'm not sure I was actually in it for the right reasons. I wanted very much to be famous. I did expect to succeed and I did have faith that I would. In reality, though, it has turned out to be something very different to what I wanted. It's the work and not the adulation that has proved to be the most fulfilling." — Gerard Butler. [Telegraph]
• "I have a boyfriend now, but I've been linked to so many guys I sound like a wanton woman. People say to me, 'Oh, it must be so easy for you, dating and boys.' It's really not easy. I suppose guys are either intimidated by me and have their defenses up, or they take the piss out of me. And I'm surrounded by cute older guys on set. That's my problem. It's a minefield, to be honest. It's stressful." — Emma Watson. [Mirror]
• "I'm sure I would have liked to have seen my parents more, and at that time, we did come second. But I like to think of them in Paris, having fun, not thinking too much ... And it was a different time." — Charlotte Gainsbourg, on being the daughter of free spirits French singer Serge Gainsbourg and the English actress Jane Birkin. [Independent]
• "He was the most important voice in our lives for thirty years. And that voice made people reach for the stars. I hate the world without Walter Cronkite." — George Clooney. [Yahoo News via E!]

• Katherine Heigl and Gerard Butler were forced to evacuate the Four Seasons in Los Angeles during a publicity tour for their film, The Ugly Truth, when a bomb threat was called into the hotel. [People]

• Britney Spears has refused to bring her sons along with her when she plays Russia next week, as she's received a series of email death threats and doesn't feel it's safe for them to join her. [TheSun]
• Susan Boyle will appear on the Today show on Monday to hype her upcoming appearance on America's Got Talent, as well as to show off her new makeover. [People]
• Cindy Adams claims that the Jackson family was angered by Jackson's close connection with Elizabeth Taylor: "She was always Michael's friend, not the family's. They resented her. Elizabeth Taylor was crushed and she's still crying." [DailyExpress]
• Want to buy 50 Cent's Connecticut home? You're in luck, if you're a millionaire: the price was just slashed from 14.9 million to 10.5 million dollars. [Yahoo]
• Gwyneth Paltrow is reportedly "furious" that she was left out of a promotional campaign for Iron Man 2, and is afraid that Scarlett Johansson, her co-star, is getting all the attention. "Gwyneth was afraid she'd be upstaged by Scarlett and not being in the campaign was the final straw," says a source, "She is furious she's been left out." [DailyMail]
• A source claims that Dr. Arnold Klein, Michael Jackson's dermatologist, is now planning to fight to prove he is the biological father of Michael's children. "Arnie is planning to fight for custody of Prince Michael and Paris," says the source, "He says he can prove he is their father with Debbie." [Mirror]
• The remaining members of The Jackson 5 are reportedly in talks to go on a reunion tour. [E!]
• Kim Cattrall has split from her boyfriend, Alan Wyse, because Wyse was not willing to give up his job: "‘His job is too important to him for him to give it up," says a source, "It's quite a wrench for me that he has split with Kim, but I don't think Alan is too upset. He's a grown man. He needs his independence – to stand on his own two feet." [DailyMail]
• Madonna will travel to Marseilles to visit workers who were injured in a stage accident for her Sticky and Sweet tour; two workers died in the accident, which occurred on July 16. [People]
• Meanwhile, a source claims that Madonna has dumped her boyfriend, Jesus Luz, "Jesus has been accompanying Madonna on tour but they have been staying in separate hotel rooms," says the source, "Jesus is doing everything he can to persuade Madonna they should stay together. He's hanging in there like a lost puppy. Chances are they will be seen out again together, as it's good for both their images, but Madonna has made it clear it's only a friendship."[DailyMail]
• A source claims that Lindsay Lohan is in talks to appear on either the US or UK version of I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here. "Lindsay's the perfect person for a reality show like I'm A Celeb. She's young, fallen and there's an element of tragedy in her life," says the source, "Most people who go on the show are in need of a healthy pay chck and also want to raise their careers from the dead. Lindsay is perfect fodder for the show." [ShowbizSpy]
• Pete Peterson, the billionaire grandfather of NYC Prep's PC is reportedly quite embarrassed over his grandson's obnoxious behavior. "He was kicked out of several schools and the family cut him off at one point," says a source, "He's doing this show to get an acting career." [PageSix]
• When asked to describe herself, Emma Watson replied: "A bit of a feminist." [Mirror]
• Blind Item:"These two Celebs who have been known to feud and criticize one another publicly are trying to mend their ways. We hear there have been calls and cards sent with apologies. The problem is, one of the stars is still having a hard time getting over the fact that the other star slept with her boyfriend back in the day. Not Angelina Jolie." [BlindGossip]
• D'oh! Asher Roth tried to impress a crowd by telling them he was a Cornell grad, only to have fans yell back that they knew he was a dropout of West Chester University. [PageSix]
• "I would like to issue an apology for the comments I made on Fox and Friends. My intent was to be humorous and not offensive. I have nothing but love and respect for Latina women and women in general of all cultural backgrounds. What saddens me most is that it took away from the issue of Hunger in America, for which I was on the show to begin with. I work and a pantry in Venice California with a hispanic women named Delpia (who has been feeding people at St. Joseph's Center for 29 years) and she is my personal hero. Having been raised in Los Angeles I have grown up with a deep and profound love for the Latino culture."- David Arquette [HuffingtonPost]