• Happy New Year, little Jewzebels. It's starting off pretty rocky, but we guided you through the rough shoals of the VP debates with a steady hand and a drunken heart.
• This Palin supporter sounded like she was drunk with her garbled endorsement of the moosetest with the mostest.
• Times are tough for this country, and for weepy Prodge Run contestants.
• You know who always has a stiff upper lip and a lot of fun? "Spinsters."
• Thankfully we can reminisce fondly about the days before we knew what a mortgage was. Check out the Jezebel school pictures and remember this: the older they are, the cuter they ain't.
• You know what else ain't cute? Elisabeth Hasselbeck when she gets all yelly.

• Even less cute: a mother and son who do it. That's like, the inverse of cute. That's etuc.
• You know, some people think Michael Cera and his Earnest Fumbling Manchildren are pretty adorable, but we beg to differ.
• We might be irked by EFMs, but they're still more enlightened than what ladies had to put up with in the days of Joan Holloway.
• But you know, it's Friday, and guess what? WEEKEND JEZEBEL is here! So kick back, relax, and enjoy the new content.

Sure, he's cute for the 120 minutes of a movie, but how annoying would it be to make all the decisions while a hoodie-clad yes-man stands sweetly off to your side? Actually, there's a pathetic paucity of boyfriend material in film these days, and it's because the men of romantic comedies are forced into one-dimensional stereotypes just as often as the women are.

We're always railing against Hollywood for forcing women to choose from roles that are either hookers, victims, doormats or pixies, but the options for men are similarly limiting. There are three categories of men in romantic comedies. They're either EFMs like Cera, Hugh Grant in Four Weddings and a Funeral and Notting Hill and Zach Braff in Garden State, personality-free perfect cyphers like James Marsden in 27 Dresses, Colin Firth in Bridget Jones's Diary (don't let the fact that it's Firth fool you. This character is not well developed or realistic!) or Mark Ruffalo in 13 Going on 30, or stonery slackers like Seth Rogen in everything or Kal Penn in the Harold and Kumar movies.

I tried to think of dudes in romantic films with fully developed, complicated, non-stereotypical characters whom I'd actually want to date/screw in real life, and the list is pretty flimsy:

• Ryan Reynolds in Definitely, Maybe or Just Friends
• Ryan Gosling in The Notebook
• Paul Rudd in Clueless
• Taye Diggs in The Best Man
• Cary Elwes in The Princess Bride
• Gael Garcia Bernal and Diego Luna in Y Tu Mama Tambien
• John Cusack in Grosse Pointe Blank

I can't even include Cusack in Say Anything, because Lloyd Dobler is borderline EFM. Is there an untapped well of boyfriend material that I'm missing? Where are the Paul Newmans of this modern world? Help a girl out!

On The Brink [Hollywood Elsewhere]

Earlier: Manic Pixie Dream Girls Are The Scourge Of Modern Cinema
Cool Hand Paul: Thinking Woman's Sex Symbol