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Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
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Grim Reaper of the Forest
03/16/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
I am so intrigued by the line "Maria might have done so as well". Can he not remember if she expressed interest in having a kid, or could he not imagine that a sexy, ambitious woman (just like his wife used to be) might someday want a child?
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Gretchen is a new kitten mom!
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
Let me start by saying this shitweasel is the very definition of narcissistic asshole. Put himself first? Hah! As many have pointed out he has obviously been doing just that all along.

But... part of me wonders what Maria was seeing in all this. If she had wanted marriage and children, did the way he treated his first wife and daughter not cause her to pause and think about this whole thing just a bit? I mean, a dick like this CANNOT possibly have an affair without bitching about his home life. That would certainly cause my douchemeter to go into the red zone no matter how much in love I thought I was at the time.
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clevernamehere
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
He's putting HIMSELF first?!

What about your two children asshat?

The truth is, this guy has always put himself first. He didn't worry about not being a good father or husband, all he thought about was whether or not he wanted to find a new sex partner. When he didn't want to, he went along with marriage and kids.
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ceejeemcbeegee is not here
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
I have a question I just gotta ask: is sex so that damned important it's worth breaking up your marriage and screwing up your kids for? I mean, really?!? Don't get me wrong I like sex A LOT, but... is NOT getting some such a horrible thing, like being denied water or air, that you have to take any means necessary to get some, consequences be damned?! Are men's libidos really that uncontrollable!?!? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!
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bowleserised
03/15/09

@ceejeemcbeegee: Bachelor at Large: Last year the Times ran an annoying article by some Tod guy that did the rounds of the interweb and caused much anger here on Jez too. They got lots of hits, he wrote more articles. Hence, then commissioned an absolute douche to repeat the success this year.

Says more about the Times' editorial policy than mankind, fear not.
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sweaterqueen resents the implication
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
How is it that people like this routinely find partners and mate when decidedly non-asshole-y people like me are perpetually single? Do I need to start lying to every dude I meet and handing out blowjobs at (my imaginary) work?
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Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC
03/15/09

@sweaterqueen resents the implication: Well, you could do that, but then you'll just be perceived as a sex kitten. Then any dude you meet will be all mad at you when you express having interests outside of looking sexy and being childless.
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ceejeemcbeegee is not here
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
But shouldn't women want to overcome this?"

Why? To fuck your sorry ass? No thanks.
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bowleserised
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
This man should have a vasectomy.
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Ulookinatmyjunk, JOC
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
God, I hate women with needs and desires who feel committed to parenting the children they bore.
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R-V
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
"I realise that complex factors kick in after a birth, such as tiredness and self-image issues, and that high levels of the hormone prolactin while breastfeeding reduces a mother's libido. But shouldn't women want to overcome this?"

What's that, Simon? You mean I can somehow control my hormones by sheer force of will?! Thanks for the tip! I think I'll start ovulating TWICE a month now just for kicks!
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gangey
03/15/09

@R-V: Yeah, just like those monks in Tibet that can will their body temperatures up, you should be able to will your hotness back. Should only take a couple decades of meditation.
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Eric Northman is mine
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
What does the Simpsons picture have to do with the article, i'm confused? Articles like this scare me because though i'm not in the getting married/having kids stage and i know people change and all but seriously if i start wearing mom jeans and become one of those women you avoid at parties/functions because they can only talk about her kids and nothing else, i'm pretty sure i'd hate myself.
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Hiroine Protagonist
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
What kind of fuckery is this?
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Brigit
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
Wait... I think this was written by my dad.
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gangey
03/15/09

@Brigit: Oh you poor thing!
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Brigit
03/15/09

@gangey: Meh, by now I think he's hilarious. Mr.B also had a crappy dad.

We sometimes play the "my dad's such a douche that..." game.
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MissGaramond
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
His douchebaggery is not up for debate, but I gotta say, this is what happens to women who follow "the rules," believing that all men are commitment-phobes who have to be lured and tricked into a relationship. Women who keep quiet about their real needs in fear that they'll scare a man away; they end up in loveless relationships with these asshats.
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Kali Mama
03/15/09

@MissGaramond: That's on them. It's the children I feel for, living with (or without!) a parent that resents them for being.
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SarsDoesntSave
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
I usually don't bother reading comments on non-Jez sites, but I was pleased today to see that the readers of the Times Online were pretty much on the same page as us feminazi lady bonerkillers.

My favorite:

Sounds as though there was only room for the one big baby in those relationships.

Emma, Cambridge, UK
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LaComtesse
03/15/09

@SarsDoesntSave: Ha! Let's fly over to Cambridge and give Emma her feminazi bonerkiller badge.
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Plum-Pie
03/16/09

@LaComtesse: I like to think she's already on here in another guise!
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maude_flanders
03/15/09

In reply to Simon Jones Blames "One-Dimensional" Motherhood For His Crappy Marriages
Yes, he sounds like a dickhead, especially b/c he made the same shitty mistake twice...lucky children. And the way he talks about mothers (women who make no effort to make themselves appealing to men...perhaps they're busy and tired and already attached, shitface) is disgusting.

All that said--what if it was a woman telling this story?

Coercive impregnation (rape) or birth control sabotage is one thing...I'm talking about women who are cajoled into having a kid or have a kid b/c they think it'll make the guy stay around, or they themselves have kids b/c they think having a baby will be romantic...all without really thinking it through, all without considering whether or not they can parent a child/whether their partner will be a suitable parent.

If it had been a woman who'd made a completely f*cked up mistake--bullied/weepied into having a child by her boyfriend and then feeling regret only when it was too late--we would be so angry? (Or are we repulsed specifically b/c he comes off like SUCH a wishy washy obnoxious sexist prick?)

Don't woman do awful things against their own interests, and against the interest of their children for men they "love" (at least, at the time) all the time? Don't they do stupid, self-destructive things for relationships all the time only to feel resentment and regret AFTER an unfortunate child has entered the picture?
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gangey
03/15/09

@maude_flanders: Yes they do. Do they then publish enormously self-indulgent essays excusing their own share of blame in the situation and going on about how men who are fathers are no longer sexually attractive? Not that I've ever seen.

So I guess to answer your question: Yes, we are repulsed because he is a cowardly, sexist, obnoxious prick.
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clevernamehere
03/15/09

@maude_flanders: I don't think this has anything to do with gender. I can't see a woman who went along with marriage and a kid who used that as an excuse to cheat getting much sympathy here.
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