Drake's Penis Is 'Weird, Thin, and Pointy,' Says Future Shakespeare

Today is the day that I read several conflicting accounts about the shape of Drake's celebrity penis and what he likes people to do or not do with his butthole while he touches said controversially shaped penis. Today is also the day that I realized that every other non-today day of my life has been wasted. » 7/14/14 8:00pm 7/14/14 8:00pm

Woman Who Filmed Justin Bieber Sleeping Starred In Porn

Tati Neves, the woman who shot the video of Sleepy Time Jusing Beiber seen around the world, is back in the headlines this morning. Some place called HotMovies.com (where you can probably get the latest E.M.Forster adaptions)* is claiming they shot a pornographic video with her before she became mega Internet famous. » 11/16/13 11:30am 11/16/13 11:30am

Jenny McCarthy Thinks You're Gay If You Don't Immediately Intercourse…

Heads up, casanovas! Good to know! Jenny McCarthy went on some radio show and talked glowingly about her blossoming relationship with old kid on the block Donnie Wahlberg. Turns out, he waited two weeks to call her after they first hung out, so of course she assumed he was a vagina-hating gay guy. » 9/11/13 8:00pm 9/11/13 8:00pm

Jenny McCarthy and Donnie Wahlberg Are Dating. Like, Each Other.

So, Jenny McCarthy and Donnie Wahlberg spent the 4th of July together (with Jonathan Knight and his boyfriend HARLEY!!!) and word on the street is that they are officially official. Like, as in, penis-in-vagina-probably. Late at night, in the witching hour, when the world feels like it's closing in, Jenny buries her… » 7/12/13 8:30pm 7/12/13 8:30pm

Christina Applegate Is 100% Cancer-Free

  • A month after being diagnosed with breast cancer, Christina Applegate is now cancer-free. "I'm clear," she told Robin Roberts of Good Morning America earlier today. "Absolutely 100 percent clear and clean. It did not spread — they got everything out, so I'm definitely not going to die from breast cancer." She went…
  • » 8/19/08 9:00am 8/19/08 9:00am

New Kids On The Block Reunite On Today

Joey McIntyre, Donnie Wahlberg, Danny Wood, and Jordan and Jonathan Knight of New Kids on the Block are gettin' the band back together, and the quintet went on Today this morning to talk about their upcoming album and hype up their May 16th Today performance live in the Plaza. Joey is still cute, Donnie was wearing a… » 4/04/08 11:00am 4/04/08 11:00am