On Michelle Obama, sarrible said: "I don't know if Barack understands my dreams, because right now I'm dreaming about me and Michelle, a pitcher of bourbon, and our plan for universal health care. We're doing each other's hair." I say: I wish I'd been at your party.

On Hillary's speech, BloyJoy said: "And that mic Tom Brokaw is using makes me think he's gonna break into Oops I Did It Again. " I say: At that point, I would've paid out all the cash in my wallet to fucking see that shit.

On Bill Clinton's speech, Lizwithazee said: "Yeah, my mailman is a superior Texan to what we've had. Also my paper boy, my gynecologist, and Leslie, the famous cross-dressing homeless guy." I say: I'm looking for a new gynecologist, and I do like a man to drawl when he's down there.

On Barack Obama, MeaniePants said: "I'd go straight for Anderson, but something tells me he wouldn't do the same. Sigh." I say, honey, I'd become a gay man for Anderson, but he's the only television personality I didn't manage to see even once this week. And Bill Hemmer even read my blog and still didn't call.

But, really, it wasn't until the Republican Convention that you guys hit your stride (and had some sort of local wheat beer spewing out my nose).

In the Rudy Giuliani thread, LilyBlueShoes said: "Rudy is a big fan of the drilling. Just ask Judy." I say: it didn't make the liveblog, but Spencer and I were IM'ing until my internet connection went dead and debated whether Rudy or McCain had a limper dick. I voted Rudy because of the prostate cancer. I'm pretty sure that's why my internet connection went dead — someone at the NSA vommed thinking of Rudy's flaccid cock and caused the wiretap to go kablooey.

On the Sarah Palin thread, Shewar won my heart with this picture, but I was a sucker for KarenWalker's Harry Potter reference: "I like how she won't say Obama's name. It's like he's Voldemort or something."

On last night's pre-McCain speeches, Sister Mary Martha summed up my liveblog better than even I could: "FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR EVIL HATERS KILLERS MUSLIMS BLACK PEOPLE FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR FEAR PROTECT YOUR DOLLARS AND PURE CHILDREN FEAR FEAR FEAR"

And while I was mocking John McCain with the reporters around me, KiddyKat and PilgrimSoul were getting a handle on the audience from afar, saying: "That is the stiffest dancing I've ever seen. Maybe because of the stick up their asses. Somebody should tell them how good it feels to be unecumbered by an butt stick." and "Several men in the audience just ejaculated. True story." Damn me for forgetting my binoculars!

Feel free to add your favorite comments from the convention coverage below.

A Note From The Editor: Obviously, these are just some of many (thousands!) of comments that went up on the DNC and RNC threads, and there are many, many others that we either missed or didn't have space to include here. (I would like to put out a request that commenters include more images in their comments - they are hilarious.) And I want to say this: The community of commenters you ladies have created constantly astounds and impresses me, and the passion, intelligence, humor, and creative cussing* on display have made for an inspiring and amazing kick-off to the election season.

*Hortense and I would like everyone to know that, starting next week, there needs to be a serious toning down of nasty name-calling towards our elected officials. And yes, that includes you know who.

1. For one, seriously, I was tired as hell when I met Bill Hemmer, but I am usually better about remembering to get at least an email address when I meet a cute guy. This was a decision I regretted when I saw him outside the media security line on Thursday and he was looking ever cuter and I was sunburned, sweaty and stuck in line.
2. Besides barely sleeping, I barely ate this week. And, while that's great for the fit of my pants — except when I'm out dancing and they start to fall off — it makes the tired thing way worse.
3. Speaking of dinner, the one time I did actually attempt to go eat some, I met these awesome women and did an interview that I am now going to publish because they deserved to get written about before. Linda Crayton, Bonita Bell, Sheila Gilmore, Stacy Cole and Antoinette Leon had no idea when they asked to share my table at dinner that they would end up doing an impromptu interview, but they were too much fun to talk to not to share! For everyone but Linda, who has attended 6 conventions, this is the first convention for all of them. Antoinette told me, "It's a beautiful thing, being here with so many different women, sharing their experiences about how they got here, got to be a delegate, were never into politics but now want to make a difference in their communities." She thinks that it's a testament to both Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. Sheila told me, "I wanted to come because I wanted to be a part of history. I wanted set an example for my children and their children." Bonita was encouraged by her friends to attend, and Stacy just felt she had to be here. Linda, who is a rather experienced conventioneer, said that this convention is different: "This is a historic convention in so many different ways — the first woman candidate to go this far, the first African-American man as the candidate, and the first time I've seen so many young people engaged in the political process." That, at least, is what Barack Obama is hoping for in November.
4. I earlier mocked the free condoms distributed by Planned Parenthood, and I regretted forgetting to take them out every single time I opened my purse because they were so bright pink it was obvious and I feel stupid carrying condoms around especially when I had no intention of using them. But then a friend needed one, like, badly and I was all, yay Planned Parenthood!
5. Our Unconventional Conventionaire and I ended up at all the same parties on Monday night, but only she had the balls for this:
   

   The insane ratio of men to women (and the conveniently alcoholic sponsorship) had me curious about what kind of shenanigans were going down — because aren't lobbyist parties the place where that sort of stuff happens? So while down in the below-ground bathrooms, I tried to bribe the bathroom attendant into spilling the goods, but it turned out she's a cheap talker because there wasn't a whole lot to spill. "Actually, it's really quiet down here," she offered helpfully. Which was true. And so there you have it: there was no sex happening in the bathrooms of last night's lobbyist party.

6. This probably goes without saying, but I utterly, utterly regret having left my sunblock in my suitcase before waiting 3 hours in the line(s) to get into Invesco Field for the Obama speech. I'm not peeling yet, though.
7. Not finding this bottle of wine myself: Not that I drink Pinot Noirs or anything bottled in 2007 (yet), but, still.
8. I really regret that my one friend who knows Cyndi Lauper didn't introduce me.
9. This guy was there live and in the flesh, but he was either too embarrassed to meet me or realized that I was insane and avoided me.
10. Oh, and everyone who I've neglected to call, text or e-mail back this week, everyone that I missed seeing, forgot to get in touch with or seemingly avoided, I'm sorry, I wasn't ignoring you. Really. Well, maybe that one guy, but not the rest of you.

MEGAN: What got you interested in politics as a young woman?

GOVERNOR GRANHOLM: Actually my folks — who were immigrants, and I'm an immigrant to this country, too, having been born in Canada, though we moved here when I was 3 years old — they were always very focused on service. And they taught me that we were put on this planet to do something more than serve ourselves and that we have an obligation to make it better, in whatever way people can do that. My parents are avid Republicans so, in high school, I worked for Gerald Ford, going door-to-door when he was seeking to be re-elected, or, elected for the first time since he ascended after Nixon.

But, when I got to college, post-high school, I moved further to the center and then further to the left. I ended up working for John B. Anderson, who was an independent Presidential candidate. Then I continued to move further left on the spectrum and became an avid Democrat, largely because I come from such middle class roots and knowing that, in my experience, the Democratic party has been the party that speaks to pocketbook issues for real people and speaks to equality and tries to make the playing field level for all citizens. So that's how I got interested in politics.

MEGAN: And what made you decide are all the kinds of service, of all the ways you could have served your community, to go into politics?

GOVERNOR GRANHOLM: I went to law school — I was the first person in my family to go to college at all and ended up going to Harvard Law School, which was a really big deal for my family — and at law school I wanted to be a civil rights lawyer. There just some truly great professors, especially women professors, who really motivated me to make sure that the law was used as both a sword and a shield for making sure that people had equal access to jobs or to whatever democracy has to offer. So when I got out, I thought I was going to be a public sector lawyer — I was going to be a civil rights lawyer, I ended up a prosecutor. I had a very good track record as a federal prosecutor. So, in fact, I wasn't thinking about political office for myself. I worked for campaigns and I supported political candidates, but I never thought of myself as someone who would run.

But when the attorney general of the state of Michigan retired, a number of people came to me and said, "You know, you should run for attorney general." And I thought, "Get out of here! Why would I do that?" My mother always told me three things you should do or not do:

1. Don't ask strangers for money.
2. Don't talk about yourself because no one wants to hear it, and
3. Don't wear your good clothes every day.

But when I started running, which was a really big deal because a lot of times women, I think, are used to being in the background and helping others, so it's difficult sometimes for women to say, "It's me." I'm a pre-title IX woman, so for our generation a lot of times the kind of competition and competitiveness and the sense of besting your opponent was not something we had a whole lot of access to in school. So it was a very bid decision for me to decide to run for statewide office when I'd never been elected to anything. But that's how I jumped in.

MEGAN: I've heard this from other women candidates, and you alluded to it earlier, this reluctance among particularly women candidates to ask people for money. On the other hand, women candidates — and you can see that from the women Senators, Governors and Congresspeople here —can be really great fundraisers. What has your experience been like raising money to continue to run for office.

GOVERNOR GRANHOLM: Well, I've raised record amount of money for a Democratic candidate in our state. But the reason why it becomes easier is that you realize that you're not asking for money for people about you. It's not about you. It's about what change you want to bring about. So if I'm going to advocate for and bring alternative and renewable energy jobs to Michigan, that's what you're investing in, that policy. If I'm advocating for early childhood education, that's what you're investing in. And it's a much easier thing when people realize this. Hillary Clinton the other night said, "Did you get involved in this campaign for me? Or did you do it for the woman with leukemia?" You did it for that. That's what it's all about.

So getting women to step out of themselves and to realize that this is about something much more important than just one person or one's self. It's not about ego. It is about getting things done. And that's the great thing about women candidates — it's that they get things done. They're used to being the ones who get things done and not necessarily having to be the one to take the credit. And that's why they're so effective as leaders and as candidates — because they're generous and gracious candidates, and they're generous and gracious leaders.

MEGAN: If you had one piece of advice that you could give to the women reading this site that might be interested in getting involved in politics, where would you advise them to start, or what would you advise them to do?

GOVERNOR GRANHOLM: There's a couple of places that have great resources. The Barbara Lee Family Foundation — now, I speak as a governor — in Massachusetts is focused on getting women to run for executive office. And they have a book called "The Keys to the Governor's Office" — but you could say the keys to any executive office that women might want to run for. It has specific steps that women should take if they are interested in running.

But I think the most important step that a woman needs to take is to be bold. To realize that change is not going to happen unless they jump in, and not to cede it to other people, not to assume that others are going to do it for them. If they are dissatisfied about something then they have the responsibility as a citizen on the planet to make that change themselves. So they need to get the backbone steel to jump in. And there's lots of tools out there for women once they've made that decision. But it's the threshold decision that is theirs. And I think they need to ask themselves why they were put on this planet.

She spoke at the DNC not because she's an old political hand, but because she's the poster woman for the unfairness of pay equity. Lilly was paid less than her male colleagues for 19 years while working for Goodyear and only found out near the end of her career from an anonymous tipster how badly she'd been screwed. She sued and won, but the Supreme Court ruled last year that, since she hadn't filed her case within 180 days from when Goodyear started discriminating against her, she wasn't entitled to a dime. Legislation that would reverse that ruling is pending in Congress, but John McCain has said that he doesn't support the bill and the bill is being subjected to a Republican filibuster to keep it from passing.

MEGAN: Is this your first convention? Were you politically active before your case?

LILLY: This is my first convention. Being politically active is a more recent thing. Recently, with my experiences, it's gotten very personal for me. Because it really does make a difference.

MEGAN: Why did those experiences make you politically active?

LILLY: When I found out [that she'd been discriminated against by Goodyear], I thought about just moving on, letting it go, retiring, but I just couldn't. So I went to court, to federal court with the lawsuit and I won $3.8 million which the court immediately reduced to $300,000. Then Goodyear took it all the way to the Supreme Court and they ruled against me 5-4. And so I lost my case at the Supreme Court. And what they said to me was, basically, those 5, they changed the law. So what I'm fighting for now is to change the law back to how it was before so that when people find that they are discriminated against they can do something about it.

MEGAN: What would your advice me to young women to avoid what happened to you, besides being politically active?

LILLY: Be very knowledgable about the companies you work for, their pay scales and their treatment. If it's a young person inside a corporation, it's good to pick up a mentor from within the company or even someone outside the company that's aware of the company's operations.

MEGAN: When John McCain said that he was opposed to the legislation that would change the law back, the bill that's known as the Lilly Ledbetter bill, and he said that we could fix sexism in the workplace and pay equality by giving women better training, how did that make you feel?

LILLY: That proved to me, without a shadow of a doubt, that John McCain was out of touch with reality. Because, I've met a lot of women that have been discriminated against, but one stands out to me. She was a medical doctor in New York and she ran the pediatric wing at the hospital but she was paid less than the two male doctors that worked under her. And when she complained to the hospital, they cut her title and they cut her opportunities to work outside the hospital. Now, John McCain's not right because, in that case, you can't get much more education than being a pediatric doctor. John McCain is out of touch with reality.

Related: TAP Talks with Lilly Ledbetter [The American Prospect]
Lilly Ledbetter [Matthew Yglesias]
McCain Dismisses Equal Pay Legislation, Says Women Need More 'Training And Education.' [Think Progress]
ACLU Disappointed in Senate’s Failure to Consider Fair Pay Legislation [ACLU]

MEGAN: I am so happy to have you back! (When you're back from getting coffee, that is).

MOE: Okay, here I am, having showered and resigned myself to brewing coffee because I can't leave the house twice in the same morning that is blasphemous, and watching Fox News. Wow, has John McCain cast a wide net for running mate! They are talking about Meg Whitman! Alaska Governor Sarah Palin! Mitt Fucking Romney! (God I would love it to be Romney!) But I suppose we should talk about last night's speech, even if I kind of think it's not worth talking about.

MEGAN: Well, the VP speculation was all the rage in the press box last night when no one was speaking. MSNBC was reporting it was Pawlenty, rumors were flying it would be Kay Bailey Hutchison, someone who doesn't have to be non-partisan was begging for it to be Romney, it was pretty amazing. And how is it not worth talking about?! It was amazing. People were crying. Like, hearing the way African-American people talk about this and the symbolism of seeing him be the standard bearer for the party, has been really interesting actually. One woman I interviewed for Glamocracy was like, black folks don't get invited to conventions very often, but we finally feel not just allowed but welcomed.

MOE: Yes, that is beautiful and moving and amazing and shit, but I gotta agree with what Noonan warned me about with that venue which is to say:

My own added thought is that speeches are delicate; they’re words in the air, and when you’ve got a ceiling the words can sort of go up to that ceiling and come back down again. But words said into an open air stadium…can just get lost in echoes, and misheard phrases.

Or cliches and tiresome pandering, which is, I believe, what that venue did for the speech. I love this guy, but if he is going to knock China within his first few minutes, if he has to take it to the illegal immigrants undermining our wages…well Jesus Christ, Barack Obama, this is your chance to point out, And I Say All This Not Because Illegal Guatemalan Meatpackers And Migrant Chinese Factory Workers At Heart Deserve America Any More Than We Do…but because we have to do right by the rights and values and ideals upon which this country was founded and improved before it is too late. And the "before it is too late" is where you get into the Iraq War, as opposed to — and here is what really sat badly with me — pointing out the Iraqi government's unspent surplus.

MEGAN: I'll be frank, by the time he got around to discussing policy issues, I was sort of bemoaning being the only woman (besides my friend Emily) anywhere near my section because if there had been more women, there would've been Diet Coke and I was ready to usurp ownership.

MOE: Which seemed tacky. But then! I switched to Fox News and Frank Luntz was yammering on about how it reminded him of Ross Perot circa 1992. Which I think means it was a success.

MEGAN: But I do recall without the benefit of the text, that he pointed out that he wanted to get out of Iraq, and used the surplus issue to make the point that they don't even really need us that much.

MOE: Those Perot voters are exactly who Barack Obama needs to vote for him! Unless he'd like to run himself.

MEGAN: Oh, God, Frank Luntz is so annoying! I'm glad I missed most of the punditry this week. I don't know that we need Ross Perot when we have Bob Barr.

MOE: Right! They don't really need us that much…WELL OKAY AGAIN YOU ARE RIGHT WHEN YOU SAY BARACK OBAMA THAT WHAT THEY REALLY NEED IS A TIME MACHINE. But yeah, no, they have some urgent needs in Iraq, and to dismiss them so glibly annoyed me. But speaking of Fox News, you know, it's what I watch when I have to watch TV news which is why I don't watch a lot of TV news. Are the other channels running those "I'm John McCain and here's looking at you kid" commercials?

MEGAN: Well, it all had to be done by the end of prime time without going so long that people tuned out. Plus, I actually thought that there was maybe too much policy in the speech, though I realize he was trying to counter inter-Democratic charges (all flash and no substance, etc.) with it. But a policy speech is a different thing. So I didn't get particularly exercised about it, though I'm pretty sure I lost 90% of my capacity for excitement on my second day of the convention.

MOE: See but, the genius of Barack Obama is that he has made substance his style, and that he has proven himself capable, in a speech, of teaching America little lessons, reaching the corners of the minds of average swing state Americans that seems to almost scramble their ideological codes, restoring in them intellectual honesty for a few seconds. I truly felt that when he "threw his grandmother under the bus" in that race speech. That race speech bowled people over and, more importantly, reminded them there's a trajectory here, that we don't give up hope on America precisely because we've encountered these little obstacles before…and this speech did not have this. Most offensively — and I do not get offended — this speech had "save our farms." Save our farms? Are you fucking kidding me?
Oh, but, loved Michelle's dress. What was that?

MEGAN: Well, you knew that was coming. He's from Illinois. I have no idea who made the dress, but Michelle has looked every single kind of awesome this week. So have Malia and Sasha, actually.

MOE: Now on Fox they're saying it's Sarah Palin as McCain's running mate. (Maybe)
Oh man Malia, Malia…she's just so very elegant! It is almost intimidating.

MEGAN: I mean, she's looked both pretty, elegant and age-appropriate, which I personally loved.
As for Palin, I don't know why she'd give up the governorship of the state of Alaska to be a running mate for John McCain. She'd be an inspired choice if he could get her, but I don't know why she'd do it, really.

MOE: Here's the other thing: I found the little documentary about Obama they showed in the lead up to the speeches — this was on PBS — I found it very inspiring because Obama talked about how his mother had impressed upon him the importance of putting himself in others people's shoes. And I think that's not an easy thing for a politician to pull off without making the other side cynical, what with so many of them being such profound narcissists, because all the conventional wisdom says "No, you don't understand, you have to put yourself in the shoes of a cliche." Put yourself in the caricature of his shoes!
Oh that is reminding me how Mitt Romney skipped the Timberland factory or something. That was Mitt Romney, right?

MEGAN: Nope, he went, he just didn't take their shoes.
Actually, I hated all of those videos this week, I found them super-annoying and disruptive to the energetic vibe I thought they were trying to create. I got on board with Michelle's, but then they just kept on coming. Sort of like the free bars but not the free food, which I'm sure has a lot to do with my current utter exhaustion.

MOE: I suppose that is enough until next time! Hey commenters, if anyone understands anything about the water supply, feel free to email me bc I need some help on a post. KTKSBAI
Oh fuck! Hold on. You can't leave without the funny David Brooks line.

MEGAN: Sure, what is it?

MOE:

For this election isn’t about the past or the present, or even the pluperfect conditional. It’s about the future, and Barack Obama loves the future because that’s where all his accomplishments are.

That is why it needed to be a better speech I think. But I'll hold out hope.

11:02 ET: For real, almost no one is leaving. And they're still cheering. I'm so tired I'm about to fall asleep at my computer and hit my head, so I'm going to call it a night. Stay fabulous, keep talking and I'll see you guys way too damn early in the morning.

10:59 ET: Watch them walk offstage... just as the clock strikes 11 and the stations all switch to their regular programming. There is one very scared bird flying about the middle of the stadium, but most people are probably watching the fireworks and confetti bombs.

10:57 ET: Michelle, Sasha and Malia arrive. Anyone else notice that backdrop looks vaguely like the set of "The West Wing"? Because it kind of completely does. And that gave me kind of a thrill.

10:56 ET: God bless us, everyone. Standing, flag-waving, foot-stomping, applause.

10:55 ET: "We can not turn back." My friend Emily just got the McCain campaign's statement about Obama's speech.

10:54 ET: MLK reference. I have a dream...

10:53 ET: American promise again. Promise, promise, promise-y promise.

10:51 ET: "Change happens because the American people demand it." I have changed from a normal colored person to a very, very red one and I didn't demand that. I demand to be normal-colored again.

10:50 ET: "I realize I'm not the typical candidate for this office" — because I'm not rich and I didn't come from some perfect family. Nice feint.

10:48 ET: Don't tell him we need mandatory AK-47s to reduce violence in schools. Or me, for that matter. Fuck you, NRA. Also, shouts out marriage equity.

10:45 ET: "What I will not do is suggest that the Senator takes positions for political reasons, because one thing we need to change about American politics is this idea that people cannot disagree without questioning each others motives or their patriotism." Well, that'll make one of the candidates not to be an ass like that..

10:43 ET: Don't tell him that Democrats will make America less safe, since it's the Republicans that put us into this war.

10:41 ET: "John McCain likes to say that he'll follow bin Laden to the gates of hell, but he won't even go to the cave where he lives." Some people snicker. I get a text message from a girl friend in New York: "Chills. Crying. I am in love."

10:40 ET: He'll debate John McCain. I mean, I think it means he's happy to argue because they always debate.

10:39 ET: Government can't replace parents and they can't make you shut off your TV. Hell, my parents didn't do a great job of that, either.

10:38 ET: Like every President before him, he's going to cut government waste.

10:37 ET: Yay equal pay! Also, much use of the word "now."

10:36 ET: There's a lot of use of the word "promise" tonight.

10:33 ET: Drilling is not the solution. Resisting...urge... to... make... joke about how getting drilled properly might solve some of my problems. Didn't resist that hard. (Heh, hard.)

10:32 ET: He's going to cut taxes! End our oil addiction! Etc, etc.

10:29 ET: "What is that American promise?" Whoa, he just flubbed a word. He never does that. Is this how he's going to combat McCain's whining about how good a speaker he is?

10:26 ET: Democrats measure progress differently — i.e., how Barney Smith is doing instead of Smith Barney.

10:25 ET: What the "ownership society" means is "you're on your own."

10:24 ET: It's not that McCain doesn't care about Americans, it's just he's too stupid to notice. "It's because John McCain doesn't get it."

10:22 ET: Barack tells Phil Gramm and his "nation of whiners" to suck it. Also, why did he wait until now to break out that line? It was a good line.

10:21 ET: People applaud John McCain's service. Then they boo that he votes with GWB. Then they shout "yeah" at another McCain line. People here are as schizo about McCain as the media is.

10:20 ET: "On November 4th, we must stand up and say '8 Is Enough!'" People start shouting it.

10:20 ET: John McCain gets booed.

10:19 ET: We're better than a country that lets a city drown. That could be cool if we were.

10:18 ET: GWB's failed policies get applause rather than boos.

10:17 ET: It's a defining moment for our country because we're at war and the economy sucks. He always makes shit sound more eloquent than me.

10:16 ET: "To the love of my life, the next First Lady, Michelle Obama." It is a really pretty dress. And those girls are still fucking cute enough to make my empty, empty uterus ache just a little.

10:14 ET: One journalist here asks his friends, "Did you ever think you'd see this?" The other guy said, "I though I'd be pretty old, if I saw it at all.

10:13 ET: "I accept your nomination for the Presidency of the United States." Everyone stands up again

10:13 ET: Makes first real effort to shut people up, which turns into chants and people finally sit down when he says "To Chairman Dean..."

10:11 ET: Obama appears. Everyone's on their feet waving flags and signs and shit.

10:10 ET: Is this supposed to pump people up? It's so... quiet.

10:05 ET: Because it's all dark in the stadium and light in the theatre, I finally saw myself in the window. I am 15 kinds of red, like going to be uncomfortable in the shower tomorrow, need to stay in poorly lit bars for at least another 24 hours until this starts to fade. My friend Emily: far kinder than she needed to be about the hilarious idiocy of being this red in public.

10:00 ET: Press box shaking from feet-stomping again. Now it's movie time! Thankfully, unlike at the Pepsi Center, they don't dim the lights in the press section. I feel like the music is something from "Field of Dreams."

9:55 ET: Dick Durbin. This is not helping my desire to sleep. I've been outed to the other, actually famous people sitting around me by John Koblin of the New York Observer. Apparently, my seat is awesome. My sunburn is getting progressively worse. My friend Emily shows the story to Matt Cooper who grumbled something at me. Oh, right, supposed to be paying attention to Dick Durbin, but that would be about the first time I've done so, and it seems late to start.

9:50 ET: Michelle has arrived. She's wearing a red dress.

9:42 ET: "Born In The USA" plays. I am dreaming of Diet Coke.

9:40 ET: Journalists explode in laughter at "You need a President that puts Barney Smith before Smith Barney." Until then, we were wondering why this guy went last.

9:38 ET: "I can't afford four more years like this." God, actually, speaking here, that would be fucking terrifying.

9:36 ET: Can I make it through this without falling asleep? Si, se puede.

9:32 ET: So many real people, so many inappropriate jokes I could make. Please note the swing state love: Michigan, Ohio and Florida so far, New Mexico, North Carolina and Indiana to come.

9:30 ET: She "discovered the truth" about Barack Obama. The truth is, he'll apparently let anyone give a speech tonight.

9:28 ET: Real people. Supposedly real talk. Can I nap now?

9:26 ET: He loves you.

9:24 ET: We love our troops. Right. Got it.

9:23 ET: Biden! Shouts out the Broncos

9:22 ET: Internet problems and boring speeches. None of us missed anything.

9:00 ET: Michael McDonald is killing the crowd, and not in a good way. Most common journalist question: "Who the hell is that guy?" The New York Times David Carr comes in with the assist from down the row: Doobie brothers.

8:58 ET: "Leeeeet the sun shine, leeeet the sun shine in!" Wave your American flag if you got one!

8:56 ET: "That inconvenient truth must be acknowledged..." Lame.

strong>8:55 ET: Al Gore mentions that Abraham Lincoln had only one term in Congress and was an Illinois state Senator, and "was known as a clear thinker and a great orator." Good point.

8:53 ET: This blog will not be responsible for the results of anyone who drinks every time someone says change. That takes a professional.

8:52 ET: Hope and change! There's no booze in the press box, so drink for me!

8:51 ET: Anyone else see An Inconvenient Truth? Me, too. Will be back with a picture in a moment.

8:48 ET: Don't tell Republicans, but Al Gore just mentioned that you can be pro-choice and pro-family.

8:46 ET: If it were up to him, we wouldn't be in Iraq or raping the Constitution but some people (cough, Nader voters, cough) thought there wasn't a difference between the candidates.

8:44 ET: The standing ovation stopped before he even asked them to stop.

8:43 ET: Al Gore is introduced to the strains of music from "Hair." Also, when everyone stomps their feet, the entire press box shakes.

JASON: Okay.

MEGAN: I think this might literally be the crappiest hour I have experienced in quite a long time.

JASON: I was going to say, this is the crappiest hour in Denver I've not spent waiting for a cab. I really need the HuffPo Oasis to open their Nap Room today.

MEGAN: Yes! I cannot tell whether the cabbies are all just kind of ruder assholes than in any other city in the United States or whether it's just me. But, for real, the dispatcher last night was like, fuck you, we might come, I won't tell you when so just stand on the corner and if a cab stops for you, it's because you called. And I'm all about the naptime.

JASON: I've had really great cabdrivers, but the dispatchers have been trying.

MEGAN: One guy literally cheated me, tried to drop me at the wrong place, argued it was my fault and refused to take a credit card.

JASON: Well, that's the worst.

MEGAN: Anyways, so, last night. Bill Clinton. Joe Biden. I haven't heard anyone call it Joe-mentum yet but someone has to, right?

JASON: I am within sight of the wall now. The only question is, when do I hit it. Do I have another long, hard, walk to the convention in me? Harriet Tubman might even tell me, "Fuck keep going. Curl up in a ball and surrender."

MEGAN: The wall reached out and smacked me upside the head, frankly.

JASON: I think Billmentum still outpaces Joementum, even when the Joe is a firebrand populist with the tendency to go off script, and not a malcontented heel with a withered finger of rebuke to wag.

MEGAN: Actually, on some level, I thought it was completely awesome that Bill's speech wasn't as good as Hillary's. As for Biden, he needs to find whomever wrote Hillary's speech and hire that person and never ever let him/her go. Because last night's was just a leetle repetitive for me. But it was awesome how the backstage staff wouldn't let him go offstage and he was the only person there that didn't know that Obama was in town.

JASON: And I have got to admit, I got unexpectedly misty at the afternoon's goings-on - that procedural maneuver during the Roll Call vote.

MEGAN: I missed the afternoon's machinations, I was in a "cone of silence" trying to get stuff written. Plus, procedural machinations don't tend to get me teary-eyed unless we're talking unanaesthetized medical procedures.

JASON: Well, it was pretty great theater.

MEGAN: It's been a long time since I was in high school drama club, but I vaguely remember that timing was key. Anyway, so, Obama showing up last night, kind of cool, right?

JASON: It's up for debate, actually. That's actually something my colleague Seth Colter Walls dug into last night.

"With President Bill Clinton a reported no-show for Barack Obama's acceptance speech tomorrow, this was the nominee's one shot to congratulate him in person on his address. Smart move. (As was his reference to the 1992 slogan "putting people first," a nice nod to the legacy Clinton is reported to be concerned about.)

The counter-argument, of course, is that Obama has been a touch too over-exposed of late, and that his surprise appearance might have upstaged Sen. Joe Biden's prime-time debut as vice presidential nominee."

MEGAN: I mean, it might be the fact that Hillary was so good, or I am so fucking tired, but I didn't think that Biden killed it last night, but Obama showing up to be like, you kicked ass, man, put it over the top in terms of excitement level, I think.

JASON: Now, I tend to think that it was a good idea to appear. From an optical standpoint it made sense. Tonight he's going to be at Invesco Field. It's not going to look like what we've come to know as the Democratic National Convention. It's smart that Obama places himself in the setting where he, you know, WON the nomination and got all that key Clinton family testifying.

MEGAN: See, that's a good point. I would make points like that if I didn't just want to die from exhaustion.

JASON: Plus, he looked a great deal looser then he has in a while. He was having fun. He got to do his famous enter-stop-look at the crowd-feign a WTF-wave-hop on the heel-stride in-own the space move he does so well.

MEGAN: Damn, the things I miss when I'm typing.

JASON: I hope these points are actually my own. Ana Marie and I debriefed at length at the Brown Palace bar, and between the beer and the bourbon its hard to know where she starts and where I end. Except I'm the less aesthetically appealing parts. Plus, I think Hillary picked up the tab, so, I hope people are still all about retiring her debt.

MEGAN: I'm sure if they knew their money was going for such a great cause, they'd be all about it.

JASON: Naturally, more money for Ana and I is less for Mark Penn. And that would have been a change we could believe in. I WANT TO DIE RIGHT NOW TOO. I cannot possibly walk to that shitshow tonight. Really I can't.

MEGAN: I'm not sure I can walk out of my own bed. Real talk.

11:00 ET: "We Are Family" cover. Man, how is Sister Sledge not in the house? Okay, now I'm done.

10:59 ET: More Bruce Springsteen. And lots of hugging, apparently. The end. Time to, like, make up for all the drinks I didn't drink yet tonight.

10:57 ET: "Change in America doesn't start from the top down, it starts from the bottom up." He's opening up the convention so that more people can see him and get on board the Change Train.

10:56 ET: Some of these people: legitimately shocked. They should get on Twitter.

10:55 ET: The whole Biden family is on his journey and Barack is happy. Mama Biden kicks Mama McCain's ass, dudes.

10:54 ET: That's right, bitches! Barack is back!

10:53 ET: Oh, and I wasn't talking about Jill.

10:52 ET: We're all ready, ad you're all awesome and he's so done! Only, don't stop refreshing because there's something is coming up next... A little surprise. And Bruce Springsteen tunes ain't it.

10:49 ET: Obama's always right, and John McCain is always wrong. "Should we trust John McCain's judgment, when...?" Man, seriously, repetition is a good public speaking technique but it isn't the only one. Please, Hillary speech writers, come back!

10:48 ET: That's right Afghanistan isn't a success. Just ask Spencer.

10:47 ET: Did he just call them "Great Powers"? I thought I was done with IR classes.

10:46 ET: I like the equal pay meme.

10:45 ET: Repeats the "good soldier/wise leader" line from his Saturday speech. I think we're seeing the results of picking someone so late in the process. God, how many fucking times is he going to say "change."

10:43 ET: "That's not change, that's more of the same." This is fucking lame, Biden speech writers. Four times? Oh, God, you know he'll hit 7.

10:43 ET: Change again! Drink up, drinky.

10:42 ET: John McCain's his friend, but he's kind of a stupid asshole. I mean, we all have friends like that.

10:42 ET: He said change three times! Three shots!

10:40 ET: Um, also, I'm gonna just guess here than 150,000 more children and families have health care in Illinois, not "150" as Joe just said.

10:40 ET: "Work is more than a paycheck. It's dignity. It's respect." Said by someone who ain't working for the weekend.

10:39 ET: South Side of Chicago! Drink again, people.

10:38 ET: Biden gaffe: calls John McCain "George Mc... whoops, Freudian slip!"

1036 ET: We're all equal! Also, equality of opportunity! It's the American dream, only it's slowly slipping away... so drink! Because they said it again.

10:35 ET: Oh, his mom calls him "Joey." Eh, 'ow you doin'.

10:34 ET: Standing O for Joe's mom!

10:33 ET: His pledge? "No longer will you hear the 8 most dreaded words in the English language: 'The Vice President's office is on the phone.'" People laugh because everyone hates Dick Cheney, not because the joke was funny. Joe needs to find Hillary's speech writers.

10:32 ET: He accepts the nomination, like, totally.

10:31 ET: "Beau-y, I love you." Aw, man, he sounds a little choked up

10:30 ET: Way better than Bill Clinton at stopping the applause.

10:29 ET Joe Biden introduced to "Pink Houses" cover. Man, does no one in America ever listen to the lyrics?

10:28 ET: Completely unsubtle reminder that Beau's heading to Iraq for George Bush's war.

10:26 ET: "Many people don't know" about Joe Biden's stutter? Anyone who's been watching this convention does because someone mentions it every day.

10:26 ET: "He, my brother and I married my mom Jill." Um, sort of ew?

10:25 ET: "He was sworn in at the hospital at my bedside." I don't want sappy Joe, I want mean Joe.

10:23 ET: Captain Beau Biden. I thought he'd be hotter. He did the McCain's thumbs-up.

10:19 ET: He has accepted the nomination. Video time!

10:18 ET: Pelosi asks for a second, and then it goes through.

10:17 ET: Quincy Willis places Senator Joe Biden's name in nomination

9:25 ET: Um, shortest speech by Bill Clinton ever? Yes, we can.

9:24 ET: Malia and Sasha are pretty fucking cute. But Bill Clinton maaaaaaybe ought not to talk about other men's hot wives. Just sayin'

9:23 ET: Bill Clinton was on the right side of history in 1992 he says.

9:21 ET: Fuck four more years. Let's not be polite.

9:19 ET: Extremist philosophy of the Republicans? Oh, wait, it's economic and not "Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran"?

9:17 ET: Autistic kids, and their parents having to get divorced to afford health care? Fuck yeah, that's the family values the Republicans want. Anyone remember John McCain's first wife? Yeah, he doesn't really either.

9:16 ET: First boo of the night for what the Republican party's initiatives. Ooh, Bill, talk to me about income inequality some more. I love alliteration.

9:15 ET: Man, I know this is Nat Sec night, but, seriously? Let's talk about health (care), baby, let's talk about you and me...

9:13 ET: Clinton Global Initiative anyone? Also, a renewal of a commitment to fighting AIDS at home? Yay. Use condoms.

9:12 ET: Yay for the Constitution? Hooray! Let's not talk about FISA. Yeah, I'm still going there.

9:11 ET: "The long... hard... primary." Snort.

9:10 ET: Foreign policy FTW. Except, you know, it's not 2004. Also, when did Bill Clinton start bringing the crowd down.

9:09 ET: "Rebuilding the American dream." That's a drinking line if I ever heard it 10 times.

9:07 ET: "Hillary did say last night that she was going to do everything she could to elect Barack Obama Obama. Actuall that makes two of say." [standing ovation] "Actually, that makes 18 million of us." Minus, you know, at least 3 P.U.M.A.s.

9:06 ET: Hillary's speech did kick ass last night.

9:05 ET: Second joke of the night. Also, his candidate didn't win but he's proud of here.

9:05 ET: Applause stops. "I am here, first, to support Barack Obama." Never mind, it started again.

9:04 ET: "Sit down!"

9:01 ET: Applause starts. They ain't shutting up for a while.

Megan: I don't know if you read Jezebel...

Rachel: Sure.

Megan: ... but everyone is a really big fan of yours, so the opportunity to speak to you is really exciting!

Rachel: That's so nice. I don't think of myself as existing in the world in a way that people can see me. But I can see Jezebel and you can see me, apparently. It's a strange dynamic.

Megan: It is! So what has it been like, this furor since it was announced that you'd gotten your own show? Obviously, seeing the crowd reaction here every time you open your mouth, it seems pretty positive.

Rachel: It is positive. I haven't been able to see any of our coverage, I've only been on it. So the thing that I'm worried about is that I don't know how much our voices carry over the sound of the crowd, and if we ought to be yelling in order to be heard and if we should stop talking when the crowd is yelling. So just as a physical matter I'm not sure what to do. And I also don't want to be rude to my colleagues here. I'm not running this show — I'm part of a four-person panel that is a tertiary thing. I am a very small cog in this machine, so I don't want to be a distraction. But, that said, I can't say that it's not nice that people are being so nice to me. It's very flattering. I don't know what to say but "Thank you," I just keep saying, "Thank you."

Megan: Do you read your own press?

Rachel: I read some of it. I actually haven't read really anything recently. I read a little bit of the response to finding out I was getting my own show. There was a strange thing that happened with The New Republic, they ran that piece and then Glen Greenwald at Salon having written that long rebuttal to it but I just thought that was like, whoa. That was a discussion of me as an issue rather than of me as an individual. And I found that fascinating academically. But I try not to read too much. It warps your sense of importance and your sense of self. I need to focus on what I think, so that I can stay original. Does that make sense?

Megan: Yeah, absolutely. Do you have some idea what you might do with your new show that's going to premiere in about a week to be original?

Rachel: [laughs] Week and a half! Week and a half! Two weeks from yesterday! I mean, the mission of the show is that at 8 pm there is "Countdown." And at 10 pm, there is "Countdown." At 9 pm, there is something in the middle that needs to hold that audience as much as it can. That's what the corporate mission is, and that's what the program I deal with was created, that's why they asked me to do it because they think that I'm the best person to do that. So, that's the mission. What's the strategy to get there? The consistent advice that I have received, and I've received it from — and I've received it from people in my personal life from whom I regularly take advice, I've received it from people who I don't know but who I respect in terms of what they've accomplished in media — across the board, the advice from everybody has been "Figure out a way to be yourself." And there's a big difference between TV and radio in the way that they are produced. Radio, it's me and one other person. The maximum size of me and my team is three people and two of them are part-time. I mean, it's a very solitary enterprise. And my reading, and my writing — my radio show is scripted — it's cone of silence, big time. A television show has a cast of thousands that are involved in producing it and therefore it is much more of a process. It is much easier to start off as me and end up losing it. It is much easier to start off as my show and end up with another approach. And so I want to find a way so it can be show.

I don't really think that I can compete on the level of "TV Bot," you know, the normal, generic TV host. I'm not that pretty. I'm not that accessible, I'm not that... all of these other things. I'm on specific things, they like what I've got already, so we need to find a way to reproduce that on a show every day. And that's been my entire purpose, figuring out a way to make it to most me as possible. And that's the strategy.

Spencer: As someone in whom the netroots and the blogosphere is very invested, someone that speaks our language, someone who tries specifically to bring our perspective out, do you think it will be hard? Do you think you'll be getting more scrutiny from MSNBC, from the corporate side, than a right-wing addition to the line-up would?

Rachel: I feel like I could answer that in theory and academically, but my experience thus far is that MSNBC has not nudged me. At all. The only experience I've had is to say, "I'm not interested in talking about this topic and if you guys are going booking me for a long time to talk about that topic, I've gotta say I don't have much to say about blank topic, so, you might not want to book me." And they've been like, "Oh, c'mon, you want to talk about it," and I've said, "Nope, I don't want to talk about it," and that's it. That's been the extent of my editorial back-and-forth as a guest on MSNBC. They've never gone there with me, ever.

And I have asked management, upon them offering me the show — and I have no idea how I would've responded if they answered the other way— but what I asked was two things. I asked "Are you looking for me to be different than I am? Talk about different things, or seem different that you've already seen?" Second question, "Do you want me to change the way I look?" I asked the questions because I was curious, but I literally have no idea what I would have said had the answer been anything other than "No, you're fine, we picked you because we like you." But the answer was, "No, you're fine, we picked you because we like you."

Megan: Did you think they would ask you to grow your hair out, dye it blonde and get Botox or something?

Rachel: I guess I was curious as to whether they secretly wanted that but felt they couldn't bring it up because I'd get mad. And who knows what it will eventually be like, and who knows from here on out. They're launching the show, and working on a very short time frame, but it's not been my experience so far.

Megan: Something I wanted to ask, that you brought up a little earlier, is this idea of being seen as An Issue as opposed to a person. Obviously your personal life has come into play in some of the coverage, in terms of being the first lesbian to have a news show. How does it feel to have your personal life out there in a way that it wouldn't be if you were heterosexual or divorced or whatever.

Rachel: Yeah, you know, there is definitely a fascination with the personal lives of people that are on television. I get that, it's a visual medium, that's how we connect to people. I have never been closeted, like, never — I came out when I was 17. I couldn't be closeted even if I wanted to. So I'm out, that's not an issue for me, it's not a decision for me, it's not something I've ever thought about my whole adult life. More than half my life, I've been out. I think it is something that of more interest to people that are thinking about me for the first time than it is for me in talking about it. I don't, this is going to sound crazy, I don't like talking about my personal life. I don't like talking about the media. These aren't my topics. I'm really interested in Afghanistan. That's what I want talk about. My radio show today — you know, I was here and then I ran across town to the Gates Center and was like "Okay, okay, okay, finally I get to talk about Iraq now! Ok!" I geek out on the news.

Earlier: Rachel Maddow For President (Of Cable News, That Is)

Former Virginia Governor (and current Senate candidate) Mark Warner was Hillary Clinton's lead-in tonight — how cool is it that a man was basically her warm-up act, by the way? Anyway, he's finished speaking, and we're waiting for Chelsea to start her introduction of her mother — this will be the largest crowd she's ever addressed, actually, and I'm pretty sure she'll kick Claire McCaskill's son's ass — and for the the evening's big event, which is really Clinton's speech (sorry Marky Mark, I'm sure you'll win in Virginia anyway). Will she rip McCain a new one? Convince the final P.U.M.A. holdouts to support Barack Obama? It all starts after the jump.

11:09 (ET): Oh, well, it helps when you keep 'em standing for a prayer. I'm out, people, I'll see you for Crappy Hour in the morning!

11:06 (ET): "Let's elect Barack Obama and Joe Biden for the future that our country deserves." Right on. That there is bringing the house down. Man, people ain't sitting down for a good long while.

11:05 (ET): "If you want a taste of freedom, keep going." Not gonna lie, I got chills there.

11:04 (ET): Just getting to the anniversary of the 19th Amendment.

11:02 (ET): Blasts John McCain on equal-pay-for-equal work and the crowd booed the loudest yet! And another good joke! "It makes sense that John McCain will be with President Bush in the Twin Cities because they're awfully hard to tell apart." Damn, seriously, her jokes were way flat in the primaries. I need to meet her new writer, for real.

11:01 (ET): "We don't need four more years of the last eight years." Ooh, hear the crowd boo John McCain!

11:00 (ET): Shout out to Michelle Obama! Man, I want them to hang out and be kickass together right now.

10:59 (ET): "I cannot wait to see Barack Obama sign into law a health care plan that covers every single American."

10:58 (ET): She sounds utterly convincing when she's like, Barack Obama kicks ass. This is a rabble-rousing kind of speech. Man, if she could've brought this in

10:56 ET: She calls out the P.U.M.A.s for being narcissistic assholes. "Were you just in it for me?" So glad she went there.

10:55 (ET): Another shout-out of the GI Bill McCain didn't support. Man, they are gonna fuck him up on that issue. Wish they'd started while it was going on.

10:53 (ET): She mentions all the shit Bush has fucked up. This might take a while.

10:51 (ET): Shout-out to Bill Gwatney and Stephanie Tubbs Jones. Right on. But where's the standing o?

10:50 (ET): "To my sisterhood of the traveling pantsuits." Man, why didn't she have these speech writers in the primaries?

10:50 (ET): I hate these "real people" stories.

10:48 (ET): "You made me laugh and, yes, you made me cry." She even said it with a smile. Way to fucking own it.

10:47 (ET): "No way. No how. No McCain."

10:46 (ET): Listing her accomplishments. She didn't work all these years for all that shit to watch another Republican fuck it up.

10:45 (ET): "A single purpose." Yeah, suck it Pat Buchanan and your psychoanalysis of what's in her heart.

10:44 (ET): Applause finally dies down. Holla New York! Standing ovation for her being a proud supporter of Barack Obama.

10:41 (ET): Um, disappointing introduction. What a let down. I can't say that I love the orange pantsuit, but, the way it drapes, it looks like raw silk and I love raw silk. Actually, it doesn't look terrible with her coloring, but could we have gone with peach? Or terra cotta? Actually, from behind, it looks like less of a saturated orange. The applause is so loud, this is why I'm contemplating.

10:39 (ET): "18 million cracks." Drink!

10:38 (ET): Actually, I really like Chelsea's narration. A little practice with inflection and she could be really great.

10:37 (ET): "American Girl"? Anyone ever listened to those lyrics? It's about someone who sleeps around and hates herself a lot.

10:35 (ET): Video starts! The Van Halen version of "You Got Me" as a soundtrack? Fail. And Lenny Kravitz "Are You Gonna Go My Way"? Wow, bad choices.

A couple of weeks ago, I set up an interview with Fox News' Megyn Kelly for Glamocracy (appearing soon, by the way, and she is super-nice) and mentioned to her fabulous publicist that I always really liked Bill Hemmer, with whom Megyn co-anchors a show. And, by "liked" I mean, "thought was completely cute." And there's nothing I like better to do than embarrass myself in front of a really hot guy, so I asked if it was possible that I could take a picture of Bill Hemmer just to gush, and his publicist did me one better and let me interview him... and then he insisted that I get in the picture with him. And he put his arm around me! Gushing aside, he was also super-nice and smart.

I asked him whether he gets more fan mail now or when he was at CNN — when he co-anchored a morning show with Soledad O'Brien and Jack Cafferty that first got me thinking he was cute. He told me that Fox News fans are more loyal than those of any other network, newspaper or publication, and that he feels that he gets a lot more fan mail now. He's actually been really impressed with how many fans of Fox News have come up to him and Megyn Kelly on the floor of the convention and said that they are fans (despite the netroots Fox News hatred). In fact, he cited off the top of his head a recent Pew study that shows Fox's viewership is pretty evenly split between Republicans, Democrats and independents.

We also talked a bit about the vibe at the conventions. When Hemmer interviewed Jon Stewart in 2004, Stewart told him that he sees the conventions as big Amway meetings — you bring your big sellers together and get them all geared up to go out and sell. But, this time he sees it a bit differently: what the crowds want to hear, he says, is simply how the hometown presidential candidate is good and his opponent is bad. (Of course, last night's message neglected the McCain-abuse, and tonight's not likely to be a particularly hit-filled evening either.)

Anyway, so Bill Hemmer is kind of a combination of endearingly doofy and really smart. I've heard people call him a himbo, and his role alongside Soledad and Jack was that of the endearing younger brother, which is what I liked about him (and them). But between fist bumping me (which he's always called "potatoes," by the way) and quoting statistics off the top of his head about both Fox News' viewership and recent polls, he convinced me that he's far from the airhead he's sometimes portrayed as being.

Key News Audiences Now Blend Online and Traditional Sources [Pew Research Center]

I finished with the Michelle speech, unplugged my computer and tried to meet up with friends. That was a poor decision to say the least, as it involved standing around the Pepsi Center, text messaging until we all realized it would be impossible to find one another indoors. I then went and found a friend outside who had no invites but a desire to be my plus-one for the night to see what would happen. What happened is that we ended up leaving so late that we had to walk to the event locations, which meant we were late to meet my friends for pre-drinks, which meant we were super-late getting to the first party.

That first party was the Planned Parenthood Party, which apparently was supposedly the place to be, as it was incredibly over-subscribed. There was a huge and motionless VIP line and an even longer general admission line, and people were passing out condoms to keep the crowd happy. Six of the seven people I walked over with bailed, and my plus-one and I had a discussion that involved me saying, "I have invites to 3 other parties, let's just bail." That got the list-girl interested, so she made a call to see if she could let me in, and her boss came out and in we went. We made a beeline for the bar. It was "open," but they weren't serving top- (or even middle-) shelf liquor, so I got a glass of wine, which was, in retrospect, a very poor decision. We weren't allowed into the VIP section because it was too full, and, trying to make our way back to the back corner to talk, someone elbowed me, spilling my wine all down the front of me. On the way out, I used my Tide Stain Stick to get the wine out of my shirt.

We made our way to a state delegation party to meet a friend of mine who was supposed to introduce me to make-up artist Bobbi Brown, but my friend and Bobbi were both gone and the party had already died. We drank anyway, and made our way up to the next party which featured cigars and fancy drinks. We ran into another reporter who said that she'd been in the line for the Planned Parenthood bash when the fire marshal arrived. Again, for it being barely midnight, the place was dying and there wasn't even a Congressman to brag about seeing. We drank our drinks, my friend got into some deep conversation about politics and I bailed for the night. What is with everyone going home early? How do I have more luck celebrity-spotting at the Atlanta airport?