New DKNY Designer Rachel Bilson Can Neither Sketch Nor Sew

• DKNY Jeans has announced a "partnership" with Rachel Bilson, who will be doing her own denim line for the brand. "Fans of 'The O.C.' really like DKNY Jeans, and I know they make great stuff, so I thought it could be good... I can't draw at all, so I won't be doing any sketches, but I am learning to sew," she says. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Good for designer Bradley Bayou for organizing a forum on the fashion industry and eating disorders. Bayou said fashion editors and the CFDA are at great fault for the growing number of young women developing eating disorders: "We have girls getting very sick because they can't beat the system and look like what's on the cover of the magazine...There are two ways to become a size zero: Starve yourself or take drugs. Or both. And yes, [models] all do it." [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• "She is a very modest woman." That's Fashion Fringe co-founder Colin McDowell on Donatella Versace. Um, sure. [Fashion Week Daily]

Agyness Deyn's Mother Reveals The Reason Her Daughter Is So Fat

• Agyness Deyn's mom Lorraine Collins is as amazed as we are that someone as FAT as Agyness could ever make it in fashion: "She has wonderful curves and a bit of meat on her. When she's home, she eats everything." [Mirror]
  
• Poor chivalrous BF-of-Marc-Jacobs Jason Preston! When he tried to stand up for a girl who got a drink thrown at her at a club, Preston got something worse thrown at him: a punch in the face. $10 says Marc incorporates a black eye makeup look into the Spring 2009 collection. [Page Six]
  
• Richard Chai is the latest designer to do a Target collection! [Who is Richard Chai? I asked Jennie. He's "very respected." And Asian. Okay. -Moe] [Nylon]
  
• But even more exciting: Alice McCall is designing for Topshop. [Who is...meh, forget it. I'm not the one reading the fashion news roundup.] [Sassybella]
  
• While we buy that Barack would smell like bergamot and musk, no way in hell is Hillary Clinton a "delicate floral." [BellaSugar]

Fashion Week Runways Were Almost A Total Whitewash

Donna Karan's Hideous Orange Fashion Week Bikes Set Free From Chains By Vigilante Jezebel Readers!!

• Locked up and therefore unusable
  
• occupying valuable parking spaces that might otherwise be used by actual bicyclists
  
• and/or chained illegally to trees
  
• shamelessly/tastelessly aping the "Ghost Bike" phenomenon whereby bicyclists killed in the line of carbon footprint reduction are memorialized with decorative bikes chained near the intersections at which they died.

Heidi Klum Makes It Work; Designs For Jordache Jeans

• The facts speak for themselves: Heidi Klum is designing a capsule collection for Jordache, for which she has been modeling over the past year. Think she'll offer hair extensions to cover nipples as well? [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Kathy Hilton just released her own perfume. It's called "My Secret." We don't really want to think about what Kathy Hilton's secret might smell like. [BellaSugar]
  
• Gloria Steinem would not approve: Georgina Chapman, Marchesa designer and wife of Halston co-owner Harvey Weinstein, was named "Georgina Weinstein" on her front row seat at Halston yesterday. Only, as Chapman herself put it, "I didn't change my name, they did it for me." [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Jimmy Choo's CEO Tamara Mellon thinks that boyfriend Christian Slater should take a more active, or acting, role in fashion. Mellon says Slater would be "perfect" to play Halston in any upcoming biopic on the designer. [WWD, 1st item]

This Fall, We'll All Be Flappers On Acid In French Boarding Schools

Posh Spice Would Rather Go Naked And Get Cancer

• Victoria Beckham is depicted buck-nekkid on a Marc Jacobs T-shirt that supposedly celebrates the prevention of melanoma. But like, Posh is not wearing any clothes and neither Marc nor Posh are exactly a poster children for the tanning bed avoidance movement, so, again, mixed messages! [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Marc Jacobs to world: "Some people think I've lost my mind. But I feel good. I feel very strong....In the past, I've been very quiet. Now I'm just being very honest. I don't know if people are ready for that. I've learned over the years to first please myself because you can't please everyone." [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Karl Lagerfeld on his favorite memory of Valentino: "Let's just say it involved more than a red dress." Yikes! [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Naomi Campbell's former assistant committed suicide over the weekend. We won't make a joke, even an obvious one. [Sunday Mirror]

A Kennedy Clothing Line At Last!

• Alina Shriver, who is part of the whole Shriver-Kennedy clan, is getting in on the whole rich socialite starting a fashion label thing. We hope it evades the Kennedy "curse"! [NYPost]
  
• He speaks! Notoriously hermetic, recently-ousted Dior Homme designer Hedi Slimane will be interviewed in French newspaper Le Monde this weekend. We're suddenly glad we didn't take a more useful language in school! [WWD, last item]
  
• Actress and ridiculous person Nicole Kidman makes her modeling debut today at London Fashion Week, albeit via video like Princess Leia because she's a ghost or something, for label Antoni & Alison. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• The super-exclusive fete for the opening of the new Barneys New York outpost in San Francisco was hosted by Danielle Steele. Which is awesome. [Fashion Week Daily]