That sound you hear? The one that sounds like glass breaking softly into a thousand pieces? That's this kid's innocence being crushed into the fine dust that will settle on him as unending disappointment. Because today this boy became a man. Today, he's 300% done with life. This kid? He. Can't. Even.
"I think Hillary and Bill, properly, want to keep this thing for Chelsea and her soon-to-be husband," the president rationalized, looking calm despite the sting of embarrassment. "Y'all probably will not be getting invited to Sasha or Malia's wedding, either."