• Diane Kruger nabbed a L'Oréal contract. [Elle UK]
• And yes, Siriano provides the contractually-obligated fierceness. [Racked]

• Asked to nominated a 21st Century "heroine" by Harper's Bazaar magazine, Sarah Brown chose Naomi Campbell, for her work with women's charities. Brown calls the supermodel "impatient in a good way." [Guardian]
• Iman says David Bowie loves SoHo. "It's a perfect place for my husband," says the cosmetics company owner/legendary model. "Everyone's dressed better than he is, and they all think they're stars — so no one bothers him!" [TheMoment]
• The Stockholm department store that was set to carry NoKo jeans — the only jeans made in North Korea, by a trio of Swedish entrepreneurs who convinced the communist regime to allow production of its $215 jeans — decided at the last minute to back out. [AP]
• "Chanel in Shanghai: China goes from Mao to wow." No, that's the headline, really. [Telegraph]
• "Within East Africa, Kenyans are renowned for being the worst dressed." And, sadly, the photos accompanying this story are not helping. [BBC]
• Christopher Bailey, the Burberry creative director, went to Buckingham Palace to pick up his MBE for services to the fashion industry. [Elle UK]
• Rei Kawakubo of Comme des Garçons — the label White House social secretary Desiree Rogers wore to the state dinner — has designed a limited edition Barbie dress. Comme des Garçons Barbie looks surprisingly normal, and costs £225. [DazedDigital]
• Christian Louboutin's Barbie, and her four not-sold-separately plastic Louboutin shoes, goes for a mere $150. That would be the Barbie Louboutin redesigned to eliminate her cankles. [People]
• Oh, look: Someone from the Daily Mail went to cover the Elite Model Look competition and forgot to Google Gérald Marie. [Daily Mail]
• Gucci is opening its third Indian store, in New Delhi, through a company the brand owns in partnership with two local entrepreneurs. Previous stores in India were franchises. [WWD]
• Vans and Robert Crumb are doing a collaboration. Two of Crumb's legendarily skeevy cartoon characters will adorn Vans sneakers, for $52-$60. [Independent]
• The Australian wool industry was supposed to end the practice of mulesing — amputating excess skin from lambs' hindquarters to prevent painful and life-threatening maggot infestations — by 2010. Having failed to do so, the Gap has bowed to PETA's pressure and announced it will stop sourcing wool from Australia. [PETA]
• Lord & Taylor has agreed to ban raccoon dog fur from its stores after the Humane Society filed a lawsuit against the company for mislabeling some fur garments. [WWD]
• Ksubi is in trouble over allegations of animal cruelty at one of its events in Sydney. Forty white homing pigeons were hired by the brand as live party props, and at least one died. [DailyTelegraph]
• What what what? Zappos is launching a printed catalog. Isn't that like going back in time? [NYTimes]
• Macy's will roughly triple the number of Sunglass Hut outposts in its department stores over the next year. [Crains]

I like that the detailing on Anna Kendrick's dress can double as a deterrent to close-talkers.


Here's the thing: doesn't Dana E. Glauberman's dress defeat any and all purposes of having sleeves? But to each her own.


Do you think director Kathryn Bigelow (The Hurt Locker) deliberately matched the fall of her necklace to the slit in her skirt? Or is it serendipitous?


Tippi Hedren looks Melanie Daniels pulled-together. (Pre-birds, I mean.)


Diane Kruger can wear flats and a jumpsuit. This is the sort of thing a fairy gifts you with in the cradle.


Zoe Saldana's really running with the whole futuristic thing. In this case, futuristic bombshell!


Susan MacLeod is a special effects supervisor. Which is maybe how she supervised the theft of this Klimt.


Nikki Reed needs the jacket to tone down the blinding brilliance of her frock. It's like looking at the sun.


Her bracelet strikes me as confusing, but given that Zooey Deschanel I'm going to go ahead and assume it's actually adorable.


Well. It wouldn't be a Hollywood event without Kat Kramer propping up the red carpet. And by "wouldn't" I mean, "would."

[Images via Getty]

Blake Lively looks incredible. And that with a ball of tin foil around her neck, no small feat!


If Nina Garcia is the ultimate authority on style, and yet her proportions are obviously problematic - is it the rest of the world who's wrong? Philosophy.


Eleanor Ylvisaker's staticky dress reminds some of us to get legal cable one of these days.


Charlotte Ronson's ragamuffin glamourpuss is kind of adorable!


Starrett Zenko, clearly having fun with 80s glam.


Diane Kruger too, except for the "fun" part, which is impossible when one can't breathe.


As a frequent wearer of somewhat ridiculous, random and jaunty chapeaux, I must recuse myself from commenting on Lottie Oakley's (amazing) outfit.


Meg Braff: Hold my hand, it'll be over soon.
Claudia Overstrom: And no need at all to mention the war.


Jennifer Creel looks like she's about to make a run for it. Somebody man the doors.


It's actually really refreshing to see Leigh Lezark in something so soft and pretty - and she does Bright Young Thing so well!


I get what Lauren Santo Domingo's doing here, but there's always something slightly disconcerting about curtains opening over a crotch.


Helen Lee Schifter, a Vogue regular, clearly never has actual scabs on her shins like some of us with little boy legs, or she'd avoid tights like this.


When it comes to Ann Caruso, I must quote Singing in the Rain: "The sleeves are lined with monkey fur to lend a dash of drama."

[Images via Getty]

Let's get one thing clear: I do not accept Katie Holmes as a fashion icon; she has not earned it, IMO (which counts for exactly nothing, but still). And yet: this is pretty fab.


Emily Blunt, on the other hand, has shown chic and confidence and a distinctive style from the get-go. And yes, I'm psyched about The Young Victoria.


Speaking of signature looks: Renee's sticking with the classics that won her that "best-dressed-list" inclusion.


And while the furbelowed trousers may confuse me a bit, no one does suits better than Robin Wright (Penn?).


Willa Holland's super-flattering LBD is one of the night's prettiest.


Unlike Sofia Vassilieva, I rarely feel that leather trim adds that hard-edged je ne sais quoi.


Kind of digging Jenna Elfman's consistent commitment to flapper-maternity.


Miranda Cosgrove's take is more questionable, although she pulls it off by a hair. (Not the Chris March kind.)


Not digging? Julianne Moore's bizarre earth-mother sack. Although it's very...nurturing.


Speaking of "not the most flattering thing she's ever worn," I give you... Diane Kruger.


It's hard to know how to feel about Kat Dennings' trench-dress, because her 10-ton shoes draw all attention, gravity.


Why so modest, Zoe Saldana? You look gorgeous!


It's nice to see Dianna Agron out of a cheerleader's uniform. Not, specifically, in these shoes.


Obviously, everyone's a winner. But if we had to have a least-favorite? Might be Cat Deeley's 90's nostalgia.
shoes.


What more could we ask? Answer: nothing. Maybe an umbrella.

[Images via Getty]

The story, shot by Dusan Reljin, opens — ahem — with a crotch shot. Now, a crotch shoot in and of itself is not necessarily low brow, but those jean shorts? In a hotel room? With the words "naughty by nature"? It just doesn't look very high end.

The very next image is not much better; Amber's famous asset is the focal point, instead of her absolutely glorious face. She's been signed by Ford, and she is capable of having a fresh, clean look. this ain't it.

While there's nothing wrong with Amber Rose showing off her famous derriere, there is a problem with it being in Elle. Because, in the context of a fashion magazine, it doesn't seem right, it doesn't seem "fashion." All we ever see of Amber Rose is her posterior. We've seen Kanye grab it, Madonna touch it, and Complex put it in a cage. As LaToya wrote about black models pictured nude while white models are photographed clothed, "It's about the roles of black women in fashion being limited to animals, sex objects, and advertising, but banned from higher fashion and catwalks." Elle had the chance to photograph Amber Rose like we've never seen her before — in couture, maybe, or just a head-and-shoulders beauty shoot. Instead, they chose to sexualize an already sexualized model. What's new, fresh, inventive, interesting about that?

This shot of Amber lying submissive on a bed — with the camera looming over her from the position of power — is almost as disheartening as the ass shot. What's additionally upsetting is that there are other celebrity models inside, and they are not photographed this way.

Posh, of course, gets the Posh treatment. Amber Rose would probably look amazing in a $3,000 cashmere dress, but they just didn't give her the chance.

Or, if they wanted to go sexy with Amber, why not sensual and cinematic, like (former model) Diane Kruger's shoot?

Better yet, they could have turned Amber's overtly feminine physique on its head and put her in menswear, as they did for (former model) Jamie King.

It's not that they didn't pull some good stuff for Amber's shoot: Her sunglasses are Fendi; the butt-baring bodysuit is $3,775 from Giorgio Armani; the dress on the bed is Blumarine, ringing up at $4,255. But the concept, vision and execution of the shoot is a shame, and a waste. But maybe you saw on the first page: It was styled by Kanye West.

• Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley: Headed for divorce? According to sources:

She's been "partying hard and hanging with a number of male admirers." The two, married in 2006, have not been photographed together since last December. [Gatecrasher]

• Chris Brown sat down with Larry King last night for a "no-holds-barred chat." Expect it to air sometime next week. Interesting that it wasn't not live — no one could call in or Tweet and tell Chris how they really feel about him. [E!]
• Meanwhile Rihanna went dancing with Serena Williams, Queen Latifah and Paula Patton. [Gatecrasher]
• At her concert in Bucharest, Madonna spoke out against the discrimination of Gypsies. She said it made her "sad" that the Roma peple were discriminated against. The crowd booed. [AP]
• These blurry pix are the "three slick hipsters" who allegedly ransacked Lindsay Lohan's house. [NY Daily News]
• WTF: Some fans were escorted from their seats by security for "dancing too provocatively" at the Britney Spears concert in NYC on Tuesday. This is the same woman who shimmied half-naked with a snake while moaning "I'm a slave for you," right? [Page Six]
• Jon Gosselin's reaction to Kate Gosselin's interview with Larry King: "She didn't say anything. She just kept on redirecting and avoiding answering the questions." Jon adds: "When Larry's ready for me, I can answer questions." [MSNBC]
• Cops have located Jasmine Fiore's Mercedes, missing since her murder. Ryan Jenkins was seen leaving a hotel near San Diego on August 14 in the car — carrying a suitcase — it was the same suitcase that was later found to contain Fiore's body. [TMZ]
• Uh-oh: Gerard Butler's pug, Lolita, got into an "altercation" with a greyhound. The greyhound allegedly bit Gerard's dog twice — but the greyhound's owner says that Gerard's dog wasn't on a leash and that Gerard hit his greyhound on the head and shouted, "That dog should be put down!" [MSNBC Scoop]
• Ashley Olsen wore corduroy trousers and a turban to a Girl Talk concert in Brooklyn on Saturday. It was 90°. [Gatecrasher]
• Heidi Klum gets naked in her new coffee-table book, Rankin's Heidilicious, out in October. She says: "It's very naughty. I've been shooting with this photographer, Rankin, for seven years, and working with him is fun because he always makes me look different. And he always gets me to take my clothes off for some reason. We'll do some job, and then he'll say, 'Why don't we shoot some more things,' and I'll wind up without anything on." [E!]
• Lily Allen looks effing hot on the cover of Elle UK. Inside she says: "I wish I'd never written [my song] 'Not Fair.' You know, the thought honestly - really, honestly - never even occurred to me that it would scare men. I thought it might empower women. I thought women would go: 'Oh God, yes, at last somebody is saying it.' I didn't think it would put me in a position where guys would be like, 'Whoa, no, I'm not sleeping with you in case you write something about it!'" [The Sun]
• Derek Jeter and MInka Kelly: Secretly engaged. [Page Six]
• Anne Heche was on Letterman last night and bashed her ex-husband, Coley Laffoon. She called him a "lazy ass" and when asked by Letterman what Lafdoon does for a living, Heche said: "He goes out to the mailbox and he opens up the little mailbox door and goes, 'Oh! I got a check from Anne! Oh! I got a check from Anne! Yay!'" [People]
• Evan Rachel Wood spills some details about her True Blood character Queen Sophie-Ann: "She's not necessarily a lesbian. Her human partner is a girl, but I'm pretty sure she goes both ways [laughs]. I think vampires are like that in general." In addition, that interview links to an Alexander Skarsgård shower scene. Le sigh. [E!, E!]
• Singer, songwriter, Mandy Moore's husband and now blogger: Ryan Adams will be writing a video game column for website The Awl. [Page Six]
• Mad Men's Christina Hendricks on the big screen! She will star alongside Katherine Heigl and Josh Duhamel in the romance Life As We Know It. [Variety]
• Blake Lively has joined the cast of Ben Affleck's crime thriller The Town, which also stars Jon Hamm. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Paulina Porizkova blogs: "I feel the need to constantly prove I'm not some dumb model." So she reads "lengthy sagas set in hot foreign lands." Her choices include: A Suitable Boy, The Soldier of the Great War, and Rain of Gold. "None of these books are under 500 pages," she writes, "so once read, they can be used to tone biceps or in step class." [Page Six via Modelinia.com]
• Are we supposed to be focusing on Carrie Ann Inaba's crotch in this "spay or neuter today" PETA ad? [People]
• Tom Sizemore: Charged with spousal battery. [TMZ]
• Bob Dylan's Christmas album: Not a joke. [NY Daily News]
• "Malaysia's government has barred Muslims from a concert by U.S. hip-hop stars the Black Eyed Peas next month because the event is organized by Irish beer giant Guinness, an official said Thursday." [AP]
• The new Darren Aronofsky film Black Swan has an explicit sex scene — "not just nice sweet innocent sex, we're talking ecstasy-induced, hungry, angry sex." This paper claims: "No wonder Darren didn't want Rachel Weisz, mother to his three-year-old child, to star." Huh. Well. Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis will star instead. [Daily Express]
• Joanne Woodward will take over her late husband Paul Newman's film project, Lucky Them, starring Marisa Tomei, which starts shooting in the fall. [Page Six]
• T-Mobile is pushing myTouch 3G, the product competing with the iPhone, and Whoopi Goldberg will star in some of the ads. Way less creepy than that Palm Pre lady. [AdWeek]
• A source close to Ryan O'Neal says there is no truth to the rumor that Redmond is getting his own reality show. [UPI]
• Robin Williams decided to get rid of his body hair for new movie World's Greatest Dad. "I shaved because if you don't, it's, like, animal-rights issues," he says. "With this, I said to [writer-director Bobcat Goldthwait], 'I think for this scene, I should take everything off because at this point he's literally shedding everything.' It's a breakdown, but in a weird way, a positive one." [LA Times]
• Isaiah Washington and his wife have fallen behind on their house payments and face eviction; the landlord claims the former Grey's Anatomy star owes $100,000 in rent. [USA Today]
• "The less and less you 'act,' great. I had a great acting teacher at Juilliard who said, 'Sometimes, Method acting can be like urinating in brown corduroy pants: You feel wonderful, and we see nothing.' " — Robin Williams. [LA Times]
• "I think women are bitchy. That's the difference. They'll smile at you and then kill you. The men just give it right at you. Oprah's just very cold. Oprah, if she don't need you, she don't know you. Streisand, they say she's desperately shy. I think when you've got $600million, take lessons on how not to be shy. If you've got $600million, say hello to everybody. They gave it to you." — Joan Rivers. [Daily Express]
• "Someone is going to take a tweezer to those brows, and I think her hair's going to change up a little bit. It's definitely time for her to sort of grow up a little bit. People are freaking out. There's a huge sort of battle, half the people are like, get them off! And other people are like, no! It's Betty! She's always going to be Betty, but yeah, the braces are gone, the brows are being trimmed, and she's going to get a little bit more of a swoop." — Ana Ortiz, aka Hilda on the upcoming changes on Ugly Betty. [NY Mag]
• "Being German, I had a pretty precise idea of what a German movie star would be like. But I've never been shot at in a film. Most of those scenes are actually quite funny to shoot. The blood is sticky, everything sticks to you and you're pretending to be in pain… I'm a big fan personally. Most actors are. All his movies are performance driven and he writes incredibly well for women. I loved Pam Grier in Jackie Brown." — Diane Kruger, on being in Tarantino's Inglourious Basterds. [HuffPo]
• "Man, we got so beaten over the head for that! It's not like the four boys and I wrote it. You get hired to do it, they give you a script and you learn your lines. If I could have, I would have done the whole thing in German, with subtitles-everyone in dirndls and on swings and milking cows. Each nominee would have had to ride in on a big cow and milk it." — Heidi Klum, on hosting the Emmys last year. [E!]

[New York, August 18. Image via WENN]

• A rare, left-handed Michael Jackson glove — the one the star wore when he unveiled his moonwalk at Motown's 25th anniversary in 1983 — is to be auctioned in November at the Hard Rock Café in Times Square. [CTV]

• Pictures of the +J women's collection are starting to trickle out. Isabeli Fontana stars in the campaign, and my god are we excited for Jil Sander's return to form. Not least because the godmother of minimalism is re-materializing after her long absence at Uniqlo's sensible price point; the full range will cost between $21 and $155. [WWD]
• Diane Kruger, on Karl Lagerfeld: "Karl is like a dad. I've known him since I was 16 – I would do a lot for Karl. I was once on his plane flying to China. He wouldn't stop talking. After a while, I said to him, ‘I have to sleep now Karl.' When I woke up 10 hours later he was still talking to some poor assistant!" [SassyBella]
• Designer Tory Burch and Marchesa co-founder Georgina Chapman are both making cameos on Gossip Girl's next season. [WWD]
• Mad Men's Alison Brie, on the wardrobe: "You wear girdles and tight clothes you can't really breathe in that make you sit up straight. That alone is kind of oppressive and really makes you feel how these women were feeling at the time." [TVGuide]
• From the horse's mouth: Kanye West isn't interning at the Gap. Quoth designer Patrick Robinson, on the occasion of the launch of the Gap's new 1969 Premium Jeans Collection, "He's a friend of mine, and he just likes to see what we do. I tell him, if he wants people to take him seriously in fashion, they have to see blood first! They have to see the blood and the sweat, to see that he really wants it — but he definitely has the capability." [FWD]
• Harlem resident Sessilee Lopez cooks to unwind. "I just made a pepper steak, rice and beans for Wendell the other night. I grew up watching my grandmother cook and she can make anything taste good. So I try to apply what she does. I'm also getting into baking, but I think that might be dangerous for my career." On role models: "Definitely Tyra [Banks]; I would love to benchmark myself after her. She went from being a pretty face to a mogul. It would be great to follow in her footsteps." [W]
• Justin Timberlake's Givenchy perfume ad has a behind-the-scenes video — the behind-the-scenes video now being de rigueur — so you can double up on your Justin pleasure. [People]
• Oscar de la Renta, on not dressing women with double-digit dress sizes: "Well, you cannot be a jack-of-all-trades. You must do what you do best." [VF]
• Robert Geller has a men's capsule collection with Levi's that hits stores next month. [WWD]
• The body of a man was found on the roof of Opening Ceremony, the downtown Manhattan boutique. Signs indicate the death may have been accidental, and the man a vagrant, but police investigated the scene for seven hours yesterday. [Gawker]
• London police have made one arrest in connection with the Graff jewelry heist that netted $65 million worth of jewels last week. A 50-year-old man, who is not believed to have been one of the two robbers who held up the store, was arrested and bailed. [WWD]
• Jewelry designers Arielle de Pinto and Pamela Love are each doing standalone presentations at New York Fashion Week this September, and Bliss Lau — whose original necklace was shamelessly re-cast and copied by Erin Wasson for the supermodel's jewelry line — Philip Crangi, and Eddie Borg are all working on collaborations with unnamed designers for September. [Style.com]
• Anna Wintour has confirmed she will be attending London Fashion Week in September. Although Wintour normally skips the London shows, this year, a special effort by British designers to show on their home turf has resulted in a glut of bold-faced names on the schedule — Burberry, Christopher Kane, Jonathan Saunders, Gareth Pugh, Matthew Williamson — that Wintour simply can't ignore. [Grazia]
• Helena Christensen is naked and gorgeous on the cover of Citizen K. [Sun]
• Ralph Lauren is being sued over shirts he made that say "Lifeguard" on them. The Lifeguard Licensing Corp. says it registered that trademark in 1937. [NYPost]
• Artist Hugh Hayden: "I do dinner parties. The most famous one, in college, was called "Smooth." I wanted people to focus on the taste of food but make everything else a constant. We puréed all the food, had the guests wear all white and arranged them in chairs, facing the wall, around the perimeter of the room. We tied their hands behind their back and fed them through this device, which looked like a snorkel with a funnel attached. So you focus on the taste of what you're eating." Label Hayden-Harnett hired this guy to give their NoLiTa boutique a sporty temporary makeover, and to work with them on the Spring 2010 presentation next month. We're kind of scared, because that dinner party sounds like it would have a long and troubling afterlife in one's subconscious. [W]
• One thing we actually do not want to wear or even see is a "sneaker/boat shoe hybrid," but thanks anyway, Lacoste. [WWD]
• JC Penney's has a line called Twelfth of Eleven that comprises mainly t-shirts, and they won't reveal who designs it. Racked.com thinks it might be Rachel Roy, who designs a line of similar t-shirts (at higher prices) for Macy's. [Racked]
• Wal-Mart's second-quarter results were positive; the world's biggest retailer's profits rose 1.4%, to $3.45 billion. Urban Outfitters' income declined by 14%, to $49 million, but sales rose 1%. [WWD]
• Kohl's second-quarter profit fell just 3%, to $229 million, and sales actually rose slightly, by 2%. [AP]
• Same-store sales at Macy's this quarter fell by 9.5%, but the retailer clung to profitability by cutting costs, and turned in a better-than-expected result of a $7 million profit. [Reuters]

• Heidi Montag's Playboy shoot: Not that X-Rated. Sources say the mag had strict instructions when photographing her:

"No nipples, no vagina, no ass." Guess that's where she keeps her good Christian values? [TMZ]

• Madonna has signed on to appear as a mentor in the new season of UK reality show X Factor. Also guest starring: Robbie Williams, Whitney Houston and Rihanna. [Telegraph]
• Kate Hudson is dating Alex Rodriguez and Friday Night Lights actress Minka Kelly is dating A-Rod rival Derek Jeter. Word is: "Things between the two photogenic actresses are frostier than the new stadium's $9 beer." [Page Six]
• Mary-Kate and Ashley: Double-dating, chain smoking, tickling. [Page Six]
• Seth MacFarlane says Family Guy's Stewie is gay. "We had an episode that went all the way to the script phase in which Stewie does come out. It had to do with the harassment he took from other kids at school. He ends up going back in time to prevent a passage in Leviticus from being written: 'Thou shalt not lie with mankind as with womankind. It is an abomination.' But we decided it's better to keep it vague, which makes more sense because he's a 1-year-old. Ultimately, Stewie will be gay or a very unhappy repressed heterosexual. It also explains why he's so hellbent on killing [his mother, Lois] and taking over the world: He has a lot of aggression, which comes from confusion and uncertainty about his orientation." [Gatecrasher]
• When Kourtney Kardashian says she is "so shocked" by her pregnancy, you've got to wonder what she means: She knows how to get knocked up, right? Anyways, she says: We were in the Everglades and I kept feeling nauseous and sick. I just kept thinking something wasn't right. I went to the doctor and he confirmed the news. I was just so shocked." Kourtney has not revealed who impregnated her, but in the past she was linked to skateboarder Scott Disick, whose website notes: "As for girls, he was known as being able to manipulate them into anything." [People]
• Anna Faris and Chris Pratt: Married. And it happened it Bali on July 9. As you'll recall, they were seen on what was thought to be a wedding trip in Hawaii in late July, then her rep said it wasn't true that they'd gotten hitched in Hawaii. Which wasn't exactly a lie. [People]
• Kate Gosselin on Jon Gosselin's relationship(s): "It is hurtful. Very hurtful. To be very honest, the most hurtful part is when his decisions directly affect our children. That's the hardest part for me." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Michael Jackson's "Will You Be There" will be remade with John Mayer, Lionel Richie, Whitney Houston, Usher, Dionne Warwick, Wyclef and Jermaine Jackson. Larry King's wife Shawn is spearheading the tribute, which will either be awesome or awful. [TMZ]
• …And Shawn King has just pulled out of a duet with Jermaine Jackson she was supposed to do in Vienna. [Page Six]
• Jennie Garth basically confirms that Robert Pattinson is dating Kristen Stewart by saying, "I can't say [which New Moon costar] …but he is dating one of them!" Oh man, it's Buff Werewolf, isn't it? Remember when they held hands? [Gatecrasher]
• "David Beckham disappoints Chelsea and Tottenham by insisting AC Milan is most likely destination for England star." [Daily Mail]
• "Beckhams set to swap LA for Italy?" [Mirror]
• Is Denzel Washington — like so many other Hollywood types — looking to make a living in TV? He's considering an executive producer role on a cop drama called Billy Stiles, written by Virgil Williams, who has penned scripts for 24 and ER. [Reuters]
• Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett: Expecting a boy.
  "Whether this little guy is a jock or not, he's definitely going to be a mama's boy," Kendra says. "And there's no doubt he's gonna be a handsome one … just look at his dad!" [People]
• Rebecca Romijn is giving husband Jerry O'Connell diaper duty while she works on new show Eastwick. This column calls him Mr. Mom, but shouldn't it just be "Dad"? [People]
• Glenn Close used to be in Up With People?!?!? [Page Six]
• Michael Douglas has released a statement regarding his son, Cameron, being busted for meth and thrown in jail for heroin: "The family is devastated and very disappointed in Cameron's recent behavior. Any family who has dealt with substance abuse knows how devastating it can be." [People, NY Daily News]
• "A New York City judge says a jury can decide whether the author of a best-selling book about the death of Playboy playmate Anna Nicole Smith defamed her lawyer by calling him a pimp." [USA Today]
• "Anna Nicole Smith pal Howard K. Stern wins OK to sue writer for libel over gay sex video tale" [NY Daily News]
• Mickey Rourke is not impressed when you "make it rain" in the club. [Page Six]
• "Jon Hamm and Jennifer Westfeldt are ready to take on Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell for the title of Longest Dating (and Unmarried) Couple." [Gatecrasher]
• Acting legend Charles Dance, whom you may have seen in Gosford Park, says Paris Hilton's British Best Friend series is "a show for airheads, starring an airhead." Her show is bumping his university drama, Trinity. [The Sun]
• Paul Giamatti will replace Sean Penn as Larry in the Three Stooges movie. Benecio Del Toro will play Moe, and Curly has yet to be cast. [NY Daily News]
• Kim Basinger may play Zac Efron's mom in The Death and Life of Charlie St. Cloud, a flick about a grieving family. [Variety]
• Bachelorette Jillian Harris stands by Ed Swiderski, but other continue to women talk about how shady he is, blah blah blah. [MSNBC]
• Blind item! "Which scorned reality star is in talks with a major R&B singer to have a faux relationship - just to improve her image?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Today some people in traffic tried to sell me a baby. A live human baby. I didn't know what to say. I said a little prayer for the kid. Wow. It all happend so fast. I was trying to figure out if they were serious, and i think when my reaction was not a good one, they just took off. I mean look. Chances are they were joking. The scary part is i really couldn't tell. Maybe i'm just one gullable fool (sic)." — Joel Madden, via Twitter. [News.com.au]
• "Ran into the people that tried to sell me their baby today on melrose.Told me to tell you all they were joking. I thought 10k was a bit high." — Joel Madden. [Twitter]
• "I learned 30 pages of dialogue in German and English and went to the audition dressed like the character. I killed it. I did everything except sleep with the director to get that part" — Diane Kruger, to Playboy on landing her role in Inglourious Basterds. [Page Six]
• "I got stuck being searched in Toronto, and she waited for me. I totally wasn't expecting to see her when I got through my Toronto search, and she was there, patiently waiting. Some people wouldn't have waited. That's all I'm saying." —Eric Bana on The Time Traveler's Wife costar Rachel McAdams. [USA Today]
• "What was I gonna do? I was worried about you. What if you'd been sent to jail or something and I had to alert the studio?" — Rachel McAdams to Eric Bana. [USA Today]
• "You know, in the old days it was very difficult to make movies 'cause you had to have 35 millimeter cameras, which were phenomenally expensive. Or you had to have rich parents that could send you to film school. Nowadays, anybody, any kid or young person with a desire to make films ... (has) access to this equipment. You have great video cameras and the quality's fantastic. You can make soundtracks and do visual effects. You can do very competent computer effects quite easily. There are no excuses anymore. If people really want to make movies, they can go out and do it. And I think we're going see in the next 20 or 30 years a real influx of creativity to the world of entertainment because I believe a lot in the young generation coming along ... the pop culture generation who now can grab these cameras and go make films with them." — director Peter Jackson. [Reuters]
• "I definitely got doughy. I started eating like crazy and drinking dark beer. Between meals on set, I'd eat a No. 1 Value Meal at McDonald's and then Doritos on top of it. It was absolute heaven." — Matt Damon, on gaining weight for his role in The Informant. [Gatecrasher]

Angelina Jolie channels Lara Croft - or Megan Fox - and it looks really uncomfortable in all kinds of ways. Not that, as her PR flacks would remind us EVERYONE IN THE WORLD DOESN'T STILL WANT TO SLEEP WITH HER STRAIGHT MEN GAY MEN LESBIANS STRAIGHT WOMEN BOW DOWN!


Yeah, everyone kinda misses the Buffalo 66 look. But there's something to be said for Christina Ricci just embracing Blythe Doll.


I'm sure we've seen this dress before (yay!), but - maybe because of her loyalty to former employer Kaiser Karl - when I picture Diane Kruger it's always in something like this: feather-embellished and fuzzy and haute.


Okay, I don't think Jenna Fischer's Grecian is the most flattering on her, although if she'd worked in a more structured fabric, it could have succeeded. Sometimes it seems like, instead of angels and devils, she's got a little "dowdy monster" on her shoulder whispering bad fashion advice.


Okay, so, I always love me some slightly-mature Valley of the Dolls, and Carla Gugino's rocking it. You will notice I am making no objection to the grape hue. I am working on it. I even - get this - just got a vintage bike with a carriage the color of Beaujolais Nouveau. It's called "The Sophisticate." And since my nom de guerre is "the petite sophisticate," it's like the universe was telling me that it was time to put aside my purple issues and move on.


I'm actually very interested to see what happens when Maria Menounos lifts her arms: does it suddenly skew poncho? Skirt? Or mini?


Do I love this corset action? No. Does it feel a little "romanticized bordello?" Yes. Does Melanie Laurent look stunning? You betcha.


See, I think I could like Jessica Lowndes' frock if my eye weren't distracted by her equally shiny accessories - which I just want to pick up in my beak and hoard in my nest.


Sue me. I love Bridget Fonda's 50's bohemian. You just know she cooks with garlic and likes folk music.

[Images via Getty]

• Mel Gibson's pregnant girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva says she wants the public to get to know her (now that she has an album coming out), adding, "I thought he was happily married until I was reassured otherwise. And then it happened..."

• "It's not like I was planning to meet Mel specifically. Life happens," she said. "I'd like to be judged if so, by my art, by my music. That's primarily why I'm here. Of course, if the tabloids wrote the truth about most of people, maybe it would be really boring... How can I be judged for falling in love? We live in the same city. I don't control who I meet. I meet many people in art and music and film, but love is inexplicable." [Reuters]
• Jon Gosselin defended his new look on Jon and Kate Plus 8 last night, saying, "It's just the way I've always been expressing myself. Things are just coming out a lot more now... This is who I am and this is who I'm gonna be." He said he's had his ears pierced since he was 15 and just decided to start wearing earrings again. He added, "It's not a midlife crisis. Everyone thinks it's a midlife-I'm nowhere near midlife. I'm 32-years old. I've always liked motorcycles and cars and fast things and I have four tattoos." [E!]
• A source says Kate Gosselin understands she needs Jon and Kate Plus 8 as a source of income, but Jon Gosselin doesn't. "Jon thinks that he's bigger than ‘Jon & Kate,' but he isn't and it's frustrating to her," said the source. "He needs to focus and make sure the show does well so the family can be well." [MSNBC]
• After Miley Cyrus' pole-dancing routing on the Teen Choice Awards she was criticized on Twitter as "the next Britney Spears." Miley responded by Tweeting, "For all the people calling me the 'next Britney,' THANK U. I couldn't ask for a better compliment :)" [MSNBC]
• Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are officially back together. Linds surprised Sam in Chicago this past weekend by taking her out for her birthday. Later they went to a club and an eyewitness saw them "fighting over which drink belonged to whom." [N.Y. Post]
• Renee Zellweger and Bradley Cooper boarded a flight from New York to Barcelona together and have been seen together at hotels in New York and Los Angeles. [N.Y. Post]
• When asked if she'd like to work with Brad Pitt again, Angelina Jolie said, "I would love to, but we have a lot of kids to raise," and added that they will "always" want more children. [E!]
• Naked photos of Twilight's Ashley Greene are going around the internet. Her lawyer has confirmed the photos are real and says she's planning to sue. [TMZ]
• The mayor of Laglio, the Italian town George Clooney lives in, is imposing a €19 on people who stalk Clooney saying, "We've arrived at the point when hordes of people are yelling his name from the street at the top of their voices. Some of the cheekier ones are even going up and ringing the bell." [The Independent]
• Jay-Z will appear on The Oprah Winfrey Show, prompting rumors that Oprah lifted her 10 year ban on rappers and made a deal with Beyonce when she was on the show last season. A rep denied both stories. [MSNBC]
• Oprah has committed the sin of eating, despite announcing earlier this year that she's watching her weight. She took girls from her school in South Africa to New York and ate shrimp fajitas and potato skins at Planet Hollywood in New York. [N.Y. Post]
• Sources say Sadie Frost is furious that ex Jude Law got Samantha Burke pregnant because seeing their dad in the news is upsetting their three children. "It's really hard for the children and they're her main concern," said a source. "She is deep down furious with Jude – not for having the fling but for being irresponsible – and wants him to pay whatever it takes to keep the family protected from further embarrassment." [Daily Express]
• Jessica Simpson's arrival in Tokyo on Sunday coincided with two earthquakes and a tropical storm. She Tweeted: "Thought I was hallucinating. I have never felt anything like this in my life. Laying in bed watching CNN." [The Sun]
• After returning from North Korea, Bill Clinton had his staff call Sony and ask for a screener of The Ugly Truth. [E!]
• ABC's entertainment president has responded to Katherine Heigl's public whining about long days on Grey's Anatomy saying, "I think it's unfortunate... People are going to behave in the way they choose to behave. There are so many people who work so hard on ‘Grey's,' and all of our shows, without any notoriety and those are the ones I'd be concerned about, people who feel like they're being criticized or looked down upon." [MSNBC]
• Simon Cowell is finalizing a deal to continue judging American Idol for at least three years. [Reuters]
• Victoria Beckham got a new tattoo on her wrist to celebrate her 10-year marriage to David Beckham with a tattoo that says "together forever, eternally" in Hebrew. [Daily Mail]
• Lady Gaga got a tattoo on the inside of her upper arm in German. "It says 'In the deepest hour of the night, confess to yourself that you would die if you were forbidden to write. And look deep into your heart where it spreads its roots, the answer, and ask yourself, must I write?'" she said. [N.Y. Daily News]
• The IRS has placed liens on two New Orleans properties Nicolas Cage put up for sale. When the property is sold the IRS must be paid over $6.26 million dollars because Cage didn't pay his income tax in 2007 and didn't pay enough between 2002 and 2004. [Nola]
• Paul Reubens will star in a stage version of The Pee-wee Herman Show in Hollywood. Many of the original cast including Miss Yvonne, Cowboy Curtis, and Jambi the Genie will return. [Variety]
• Katie Price had a ruined the vow renewal ceremony of her make-up artist Gary Cockerill and Phil Taylor by climbing onstage and screaming at the guests, "You're all fucking cunts," then announcing that ex Peter Andre is a "fucking asshole." [The Sun]
• Pete Doherty will appear in court today to face drunk driving charges. He previously plead not guilty to dangerous and drunk driving but admitted to drug possession charges and not having a license or insurance. [The Mirror]
• Candy Spelling says, "I have been trying and I'm never going to stop trying to reconcile with Tori. I love her. She is my child." She also insists that while Tori Spelling's TV show made it look like she just didn't show up to her granddaughter's birthday party, she actually emailed Tori on the day of the party to cancel. [OK]
• When asked about Candy Spelling's claim that her grandchildren are being used as "reality show props," Tori Spelling pretended she hadn't read her mom's recent statement but husband Dean McDermott said, "We don't use our children as props, we take really good care of our children, we love our children... everyone's entitled to their opinion." [TMZ]
• Leighton Meester and Sebastian Stan are getting serious. A friend says they're planning on moving in together soon and this weekend they went to a club with Demi Moore and his Spread co-star Ashton Kutcher. [N.Y. Post]
• The Georgia home of Lisa Wu-Hartwell of Real Housewives of Atlanta and her husband, football player Edgerton Hartwell was foreclosed on last week. Their rep says, "Ed and Lisa are fine. They have settled in their [new] home, that sits on 10 acres and they OWN it!" [TMZ]
• Thom Yorke says Radiohead may release single songs but won't be making another album anytime soon because, "we've all said that we can't possibly dive into that again. It'll kill us." He added, "None of us want to go into that creative hoo-ha of a long-play record again. Not straight off." [BBC]
• Country duo Kix Brooks and Ronnie Dunn posted a message on their website saying they've agreed to "call it a day" after 20 years of performing together. Brooks & Dunn will release a greatest hits album next month and do a final tour in 2010. [AP]
• Diane Kruger, who is dating Joshua Jackson, said she's not interested in marrying again because her first marriage ended in divorce. She explained, "I felt terribly responsible for someone else's feelings and their life. It's painful to love each other but not be able to be together." [Daily Express]
• "I'm glad I'm not coming up now. I would never be able to deal with that kind of media attention that these actors do now. I really feel fortunate that I lived my life and raised my family and did all of that without being hounded." — Jessica Lange [E!]
• On the show Who Do You Think You Are Kim Cattrall discovered her grandfather was married to two women at the same time. "I knew he was gutsy, but now he's a criminal. Unbelievable," said Cattrall, "I'm quite angry about that. As a woman I find that quite despicable." [Daily Mail]

• Lindsay Lohan is on the cover of Elle UK — the shoot where jewelry went missing! — and here's what Editor-in-Chief Lorraine Candy writes in her Editor's letter:

"Lindsay Lohan wrote me a note during this month's cover shoot. It read, 'Let's do it again some time.' I've put it on my office wall because, in all honesty, I don't know if I could. This was the most unpredictable, and confusing cover shoot in my magazine career. First, Lindsay was about to arrive. Then she was in Paris. She was almost on set, then she disappeared into her hotel room. She was ready for her interview, then she had to have a fake tan! But we got there. And what we got was amazing. This shoot is truly original, just like Ms Lohan herself. In the end, she did her job brilliantly and, I hope you'll agree, so did we." Here's video from behind-the-scenes at the shoot [Elle TV]

• Chris Brown will be sentenced on Wednesday and appear on Larry King Live afterward: He'll apologize for assaulting Rihanna on TV. [Radar Online]
• Was Chris Brown forcibly removed from an upscale bowling alley in NYC last week for "partying too much"? [Fox 411]
• Take note: Tom Cruise is David and Victoria Beckham's "relationship guru." [Daily Express]
• "David Beckham is to star alongside Arnold Schwarzenegger in TV ads promoting California to tourists." [The Sun]
• Ryan O'Neal says of Farrah Fawcett's funeral: "I had just put the casket in the hearse and I was watching it drive away when a beautiful blonde woman comes up and embraces me. I said to her, 'You have a drink on you? You have a car?' She replied, 'Daddy, it's me - Tatum!' I was just trying to be funny with a strange Swedish woman, and it's my daughter. It's so sick." Tatum O'Neal says: "That's our relationship in a nutshell. You make of it what you will." [The Sun]
• Vanity Fair produced two different covers for its September issue: Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett. These deaths bumped a scheduled Mad Men cover, so now the actors from the show will be inside. Boo. [WWD]
• This paper spoke with the grandmother of the Samantha Burke, woman that Jude Law got pregnant. Delores Burke, 80, says: "What I want to know is how a girl gets pregnant in this day and age? Yes, it takes two people but he is the older and wiser man and he should have made sure nothing like this happened. I'm mad at him, we all are. He has other children. Didn't he think about how his actions would affect them?" [Daily Mail]
• "Samantha, her mom, and her family can affirm that Jude has been responsive and supportive throughout the relationship and pregnancy, and know that he will remain so as a father once Baby Sophia is born." [People]
• Video of Samantha Burke talking to the media at the link. TMZ]
• Apparently Samantha barely had any boyfriends, hence the headline: Prude Until Jude. [The Sun]
• A source says: "Jude sleeps with so many different women. A lot of names were going around as to who the mother of his baby could be." [Page Six]
• Jude's ex, Sadie Frost, is the oldest of 10 half brothers and sisters and mother of four kids from two marriages, so she's "understanding" and wants her kids with Jude to meet the new child. [Mirror]
• Jude Law allegedly told Sadie Frost that he only slept with Samantha Burke once, after a drunken party. [Daily Mail]
• Jessica Biel sings! She's playing Sarah Brown in Guys and Dolls at the Hollywood Bowl, and says she would love to to go Broadway: "That is one of my eight-year-old dreams. That's like my little eight-year-old inside me is cartwheeling around, thinking about that idea." [AP]
• Mariah Carey's new CD will have ads. Actually, the CD booklet will be a 34-page mini magazine in co-production with Elle… with ads from Elizabeth Arden, Angel Champagne, Carmen Steffens, Le Métier de Beauté and the Bahamas Board of Tourism. [BrandWeek]
• Paris Hilton's estranged manager Jason Moore is hopping a book about how he molded this blond piece of clay into a global icon." [Rush & Molloy]
• Dr. Conrad Murray was getting $150,000 a month to be Michael Jackson's personal physician. But many of his previous patients were low-income. "There are many, many patients that thank God this man was here for them," says one. One patient said Murray performed angioplasty on him three years ago without ever being guaranteed he would be paid. [CNN]
• If you have $30 million or so, you can big on the Andy Warhol portrait of Michael Jackson, going up for auction soon. [BBC News]
• Jon & Kate Plus 8 will not become Jon & Kate Plus Dates. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Leslie Mann says her husband Judd Apatow gives her anecdotes to tell while she's promoting new film Funny People: "He has trained me to be ultra-prepared, to have five stories ready to go. He gives what I say a beginning, a middle, and an end. Whereas I'd just barf it out," she says. "It's really lazy of me to depend on him to make me sound sensible, but so what? I'm lazy." [The New Yorker]
• Milla Jovovich: Getting hitched for the third time; filmmaker Paul W.S. Anderson is her fiancé. [Daily Mail]
• Tilda Swinton and 40 other people are pulling a film screen through the Scottish Highlands "on an eight and a half day odyssey through the mountains, camping each night in a different village." [Guardian]
• In this interview, Diane Kruger says she is a "country girl" and "definitely not sophisticated." The reporter writes: "What utter hogwash! Kruger spent most of her childhood summers on a scholarship to the Royal Ballet School in London, then five years as a top-drawer international model, based in Paris, before becoming a film actress." [Times of London]
• Liev Schreiber says kids make you youthful: "I'm older physically, but spiritually much younger." [People]
• Kate Middleton, aka Prince William's girlfriend, has had a series of meetings with Sir Richard Branson, in an effort to "sharpen her business acumen." [Daily Mail]
• Editors at British magazine Pride are apologizing for manipulating comments made by Nia Long, which made it seem like she was ranting about Beyoncé's acting skills. [Daily Express]
• Liza Minnelli will not be on Ugly Betty, but she will be on Drop Dead Diva. [AP]
• Whoops! Emile Hirsch and an Emile Hirsch impostor both attended the same party. [Page Six]
• Eric Bana is hot and talking about his attraction to cars. [Daily Mail]
• Sienna Miller on GI Joe: "If these films are well done I can find them quite entertaining. But…I prefer indie, arty films really. It's not the kind of film I'd normally go and see." [Guardian]
• In addition, Sienna's GI Joe wig cost cost £4,800. [Telegraph]
• Carey Hart says he and Pink are going to have a baby… Eventually. "She still has another 18 months of touring, and I'm pretty heavy in competing again in all my businesses, so it's definitely going to happen, but just not anytime soon." [E!]
• Q: A character with special needs or a prostitute-those are usually the two paths to Oscar. Had you considered that? Hugh Dancy: "I genuinely didn't. But now that you've said that, if it doesn't work out for me with Adam, I'll play a hooker next. There was the worry that if we didn't pull this off, I would look doubly exposed. Like, 'Really? You thought that was going to work? Better luck next time! There's this great prostitute movie coming out-maybe you should give that a shot.'" [BlackBook]
• Kevin Costner and his band were set to perform in Canada when suddenly the stage collapsed. One person died and at least 60 people were injured, including 2 members of Costner's band. [TMZ]
• Funny interview with Michael Ian Black and Michael Showalter, at the link. [BlackBook]
• Sheree from The Real Housewives Of Atlanta seems psyched that she was the number one trending topic on Twitter last week after her "Who's gonna check me, boo?" argument. She says: "You don't want to be on the wrong side of Sheree. You really don't. I tell them all the time, 'Don't let the cute face fool you!'" [E!]
• He's done Ali G, Borat and Brüno.What will Sacha Baron Cohen do next? How about a Eurovision music mockumentary? [The Sun]
• Kathleen Turner spills about living the last 17 years with the pain of rheumatoid arthritis, taking steroids which made her puffy and bloated and then turning to vodka to kill the pain — and becoming a drunk. [Daily Mail]
• Omarosa will be on TV One in a new series called Life After. [WaPo]
• "In Cold Souls, opening Friday in limited release, the actor Paul Giamatti plays an actor named…Paul Giamatti." [LA Times]
  
• Billy Joel is "distraught" over his breakup with Katie Lee Joel and "obsessed" with getting her back. [Page Six]
• People you may or may not have hear of had a kid: "Survivor & Amazing Race's Rob and Amber Become Parents." [People]
• Hollywood is out of ideas, part MCDXLIV: Steven Spielberg will direct a remake of Harvey, about a man and his friendship with an invisible six-foot tall rabbit. The original flick was released in 1950 and starred James Stewart. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Will Ferrell has left the film project Neighborhood Watch. [Variety]
• Dustin "Screech"Diamond: purposely excluded from the Saved By The Bell reunion by his castmates. [NY Daily News]
• Whatshername will celebrate her divorce with a televised "party extravaganza." [The Sun]
• Whatshername is on "yet another" holiday, and her cagefighter boyfriend is with her. [Daily Mail]
• Whatshisname has been crying himself to sleep and wishes he were stronger. [Mirror]
• "They did try to submit in the comedy category in the '90s and suffered from doing it in an era of juggernaut comedies like Friends and Seinfeld and Cheers and whatnot. And The Simpsons was as well written, if not more so, as any of those — but suffered from the prejudice against the medium. So I think perhaps in reparation for that, they should give them an honorary achievement Emmy." — Seth MacFarlane. [LA Times]
• "At 21 I married Luc Besson and we bought a beautiful 13-room chateau in Normandy. I was totally happy, drinking wine, walking in the forests and riding horses in the beautiful farmland. It didn't work because he was so much older. I was young and staying up late, playing the guitar and hanging out with my friends. He was the early riser who went to sleep early. He expected me to be the perfect wife, which was natural - the hostess entertaining his friends. But I was like, 'Aaaargh! I don't even like those people.' It's too bad it didn't work because he was an incredible person and I was an incredible girl, but the timing wasn't right." — Milla Jovovich. [Daily Mail]
• "I think Hillary Clinton is one of the most amazing women of this time. I don't know her and I don't know — should I call her? I'm sure she's busy. But I know they know this movie's being made. And I just want to call and say: Do you have any thoughts or feelings I should be aware of? Of course I can't make that call. I feel like saying, 'I'm going to play you in this movie and I have a lot of respect for you and is there anything you want me to say?'" — Hope Davis. [LA Times]
• "Whatever I say, I get myself into trouble." — Sienna Miller. [Guardian]
• "When I'm not working, I feel like a Ferrari in the garage. You have all this potential and you just want to break out." — Glenn Close. [LA Times]
• "I would talk my wacky language to him and he'd interpret it to the drummer. I'd say, 'I want it to sound like Zeus woke up from a nap and he's pissed and there's an opening in the clouds and he starts handing out lightning bolts,' which is crazy, but that's how I hear the rhythm. And Omar, he whispers some things to the drummer, and that's exactly what it sounds like. It really encouraged the songwriter within me." — Juliette Lewis, on recording her band's new album, produced by The Mars Volta's Omar Rodriguez-Lopez. [Reuters]
• "I have a theory that people feel as attractive as they did as a child. I was a really hideous child. People who were attractive as children have a sense of entitlement. I have a sense of awkwardness." — Kate Beckinsale. [Times of London]
• "Troy launched me but it launched me as the face that launched a thousand ships and not as an actress. I want roles where I have to expose my soul." — Diane Kruger. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "I have never come across a female character that is written with Blanche's level of complexity, in that she's vulnerable, she's pathetic, she's a monster, she's nasty, she's tender, she's kind – she's so many things that you never know quite what she's going to do next. I've never come across so rich a character before." — Rachel Weisz on being in A Streetcar Named Desire in London. [Telegraph]
• "My life has gotten more surreal in stair steps. from the blog to the book to the movie to 'Oh my God, Nora Ephron's directing it! Oh my God, Meryl Streep's in it!' So right now I'm at this sort of surreal-is-the-new-normal phase. I'm cool with it." — Julie Powell, whose blog became the movie Julie & Julia. [NY Daily News]
• "I'm so not the relationship go-to girl. But I'm much clearer about what a relationship is, which is why I will never marry again. Gabriel and I have a great partnership and a lovely daughter. But I once was stupid enough to say, in a previous relationship, 'I'm going to be with this person for ever,' and realized, as I grew, that I don't know if for ever is possible. Gabriel and I don't look at our relationship in terms of for ever, we look at it as right here today. And today means being the best people we can be, the best parents we can be. It's wonderful, but neither one of us feels the need to attach ourselves to each other for life – because it may not be that." — Halle Berry. [Daily Mail]
• "I hate alcoholics and AA. If you can't drink responsibly, don't drink at all. Don't go to meetings, whine about your character flaws and blame the fact that you are a sociopath on booze" — Roseanne Barr to Heeb. [Page Six]

Okay, despite the bandage-spawn fatigue, gotta say that Diane Kruger's working this futuristic iteration!


I was scared of Xenia Seeberg's Stevie-Nicks-at-Playboy-Mansion look even before she assumed this...position.


Actress Jennifer Ulrich demonstrates why the exposed zipper screams "2009."


I almost want to ask Nadine Warmuth: why wear such an easy, comfy-looking frock and then such wickedly uncomfortable shoes?


What woman among us wouldn't wear Yvonne Hoelzel's crisp ensemble? I'm not saying it would look as good, but I don't like "facts."


Hannah Herzsprung makes this simple tunic look like a million bucks. Which, in the current climate, I guess means quite a bit again.


Uh oh! Anna Thalbach is wearing a suspiciously similar dress! Good thing she had a belt to throw on. Recently I was at a wedding and it turned out three women were sporting the same (lovely) frock. One of them took a look around, darted out, and came back an hour later wearing something else.


Nora Tschirner: Hef called, he wants his loungewear back. Because the line was busy, Louis XIV couldn't get through to demand his shoes.


Jana Pallaske is looking seriously deco-futuristic! Can't you see Elsa Lanchester rocking this? Or Flash Gordon's nemesis? Make of this what you will.


Aww, now I'm imagining designer Michael Michalsky painstakingly detailing his jacket in his room. While listening to Pat Benatar.


Dresses that do the "breast-sling" thing make me seriously nervous. Dennenesch Zoude is less neurotic, more awesome.


Even though it looks like an Anarchist is about to leap out and denounce Brad Pitt's suit lining, he's cool as a cuke.


Where was Katja Riemann coming from? The gym? The boudoir? A Chaplin movie? The set of The Wild Bunch?


[Images via Getty]

• American Idol runner-up Adam Glambert has been vague about his sexuality, but a source says:

He'll come out, officially, on the cover of the next Rolling Stone. [Page Six]

• For the love of Zeus: Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer might be back on. Here is an actual quote from a "source" o the set of The Baster: "[John] wasn't calling her or texting her. But, as she got lonelier and the shoot for her new movie wore on, she started reaching out to him, sometimes very late at night and sometimes after a few too many glasses of wine." Boozy old lonely sad tragic drunk dialing! [MSNBC]
• Jen Aniston's movie is filming near her ex-roommate's restaurant; the roomie is the one who wrote a memoir and depicted Aniston as "weight-obsessed." Unscripted dramz. [Page Six]
• Pierce Brosnan saved Uma Thurman from an out-of-control van on the set of Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief! He saw the runaway vehicle "hurtling down a hill" towards Uma and jumped into the drivers' seat and slammed on the brakes. [Daily Express]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Nicole Kidman dyed her hair red and has a "poochy stomach," so clearly she must be pregnant. [Page Six]
• Kate Hudson and Alex Rodriguez have been dating for about a week but she is "already following A-Rod around." [Page Six]
• Order in the court! Al Roker got in big trouble yesterday for snapping pictures while on jury duty. [NY Daily News]
• Daniel Craig and Hugh Jackman together on Broadway? Can your ovaries stand it? [NY Daily News]
• The ex-wife of Jon Cryer (aka Duckie Dale) has been arrested for felony child neglect. [TMZ]
• Is Demi Moore going to the UK without Ashton Kutcher? Well that would mean a woman acting independently of her husband! Sound the alarm! [Mirror]
• "Carla Bruni: I feel pain when people criticise my husband... and mock my low-heeled shoes." [Daily Mail]
• Will Susan Boyle bail out of Britain's Got Talent? At this point, she could get a record deal without actually finishing the program. "The producers of the show are going to do everything in their power to make sure she is there on May 30," said a source close to the show. "Whatever Susan wants between now and then, she'll have." [MSNBC Scoop]
• This report says that network bosses will not get rid of Susan Boyle, despite the fears that she's not coping well with her new-found fame. [Mirror]
• Before he joined the cast of SNL, Andy Samberg worked as a writer for the MTV Movie Awards. So the fact that he's hosting Sunday's show means he's coming full circle, in a way. He says: "It's going to be action packed. There's going to be some surprises - nothing I can divulge, but it will involve celebrities. It's going to be great. There's going to be some pre-taped stuff, some digital shorts-style stuff, and a lot of fun collaborations." [AP]
• The rules for I'm A Celebrity…Get Me Out Of Here state that there is to be "no bullying, nonconsensual touching, racist or homophobic language, romantic advances (at least ones 'which are not desired or returned'), assault or sex in camp." Can Heidi and Spencer abide? [Gatecrasher]
• Four words: Bridget Jones The Musical. [NY Post]
• Is Disney being cheap with Miley Cyrus? She's getting "only" $5,000 for a week of work to guest star on The Suite Life On Deck. [TMZ]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin spent Memorial Day apart: She took the kids on a boat ride in North Carolina; he was seen in an upstate New York bar with two women. [People]
• Here's video of the Gossip Girl cast talking about various things; Blake Lively has been traveled through Asia on her break from the show and is halfway to getting certified for her scuba license. Penn Badgley went with her and grew a beard, saying, "I looked like a homeless person." [E!]
• The Jonas Brothers do not fight, says Nick Jonas. "We get along very well. I think it's just because we have a different kind of respect for one another, being in the band together. We consider each other as equals. There's no picking on the youngest, it's just not that way." Boo. Zzzzz. [Mirror]
• "Her sunglasses gleam. Her skin is scrubbed, her body pneumatic, her vast white teeth dazzling in the sunshine. Meeting Kruger is, in fact, an almost entirely predictable experience. She is pleasant and pretty and punctual […] She looks extraordinary on screen, but disarmingly normal face-to-face. She is not alienatingly gorgeous […] bland, malleable beauty […]" — from a profile on Diane Kruger. [Guardian]
• Lily Allen will have a cameo appearance in the Aussie soap Neighbors. [Independent]
• Cate Blanchett's Sydney Theatre Company is thankful to Tom Stoppard, whose play Rock and Roll sold the largest number of tickets over the last 12 months. [Telegraph]
• So Mayim Bialik is the first celeb on What Not To Wear, but Stacy London and Clinton Kelly had some restrictions: the woman formerly known as Blossom doesn't wear pants or leather. [People]
• Sherri Shepherd will be taking WWE superstar wrestler Montel Vontavious Porter (MVP) to the prom. No, really. [Page Six]
• Dr. Dre appears in a Dr. Pepper ad, and so do eight seconds of his new, long-awaited album, Detox. [LA Times, Reuters]
• Comedian Zach Galifianakis gets a lot of big-screen time in The Hangover, which could make him into a movie star. [WSJ]
• NBC CEO Jeff Zucker says Seinfeld would not make it on TV today, since shows have less time to mature. [CBS News]
• An Australian woman was sentenced to more than two years in prison today for stalking American Idol's Diana DeGarmo over the Internet. [AP]
• Amy Adams will star in Leap, about a very detail-oriented woman who plans to propose to her boyfriend on Leap Day — "and things sort of go off course with the help of a very handsome, roguish Irishman." Matthew Goode is her co-star. [USA Today]
• Break out the jazz flute: Will Ferrell's in talks to do an Anchorman sequel. [NY Daily News]
• Emily Mortimer has purchased a house in Amagansett, Long Island. [Daily Express]
• Chris Martin has lost his voice and Coldplay had to cancel a show in Saratoga Springs, NY. [The Sun]
• Steve Martin's banjo music CD means the actor is on the U.S. pop album chart for the first time since 1981. [Reuters]
• Lucy Gordon, the Spider-Man 3 actress who was found dead in her paris apartment last week, apparently hanged herself, two days before her 29th birthday. She had just finished filming her role as British model-actress Jane Birkin in the biopic of Serge Gainsbourg when she died. [People]
• Phil Spector will be sentenced today. [UPI]
• The Rockabye Baby! CD has hits by Nirvana, Queen, AC/DC, Bob Marley and Pink Floyd — done in lullaby version. With the lights out, it's less dangerous? [The Sun]
• Blind item: "Which former newscaster was so drunk at a recent fete that she could barely remember her own name, never mind what day it was?" [Gatecrasher]
• "There are people who take the quest for youth too far. Madonna – she's from the show-off brigade. She makes my skin crawl. I call her desperate. I know she's got a wonderful willpower and beauty regime but talk about the ‘me' generation wrapped up in one! I think as you get older, you get the face you deserve. I'm hoping that good habits will get me through." — former Dynasty actress Stephanie Beacham. [Daily Express]
• "I tried really hard not to be who I am. I tried super hard. It was a difficult journey for me to come to terms and be whole and happy with who I am." — Kelly McGillis, who says coming out as a lesbian has not been easy, either. [People]
• "It is sad that Linda Hogan continues to attempt to throw her family under the bus to gain publicity. In terms of the ongoing divorce suit, Hulk Hogan and his legal team would gladly take Linda up on her offer to submit to a legally supervised drug test and certainly Terry would do the same. We believe the results would speak for themselves and reveal that Linda's idea of a good time would definitely not be appropriate for Mass or a family restaurant." — An attorney for Hulk Hogan. [Perez]
• "The Tonight Show means everything to me. I'll have good moments and bad, but I'll keep coming at it. At 4 a.m., I do wake up sometimes and go, 'Oh my God, it's The Tonight Show. But nothing funny comes out of reverence. I'll take care of this franchise. The key is to put aside the fear and say, 'Let's just make some people laugh.'" — Conan O'Brien, who plans to host the show "Until I'm 160, because there will be medical advancements. Fallon will take over for me when I retire at 108 to travel with my family. But it won't be Jimmy, it'll be his brain in a jar." [USA Today]
• "As I look around my friends' Tweets I see banality on all sides. I think if people were able to take these 140 characters (allowed in each post) and develop a poetic Western form - a haiku of our own in which all human existence could be compressed into those 140 characters - that would be a satisfying thing, but that's not what I see when I read them." — Hugh Laurie on Twitter. [MSNBC]
• "Tattoos are sexy. I love my name on a woman; it lets me know I'm serious" — Tyrese Gibson to InStyle. [Page Six]
• "I really want to work with Madonna. It doesn't seem a likely pairing, maybe, but I just think that she is so creative and has such vision." — Adam "Glambert" Lambert. [Mirror]

• Chris Brown is being sued for assault and battery, but not by anyone you know:

The suit is being filed by Robert Rosen, who took a photo of Brown playing basketball at a gym in L.A. Rosen ran away when Brown's bodyguards noticed him; but fell down the stairs in his rush. Then, according to this report, one of the bodyguards "picked him up by his shorts and physically assaulted him, causing further injuries." [Radar Online]

• Chris Brown's lawyer, Mark Geragos, says: "This is a specious and frivolous lawsuit by one of the paparazzi seeking publicity and a payday. [Rosen] has done this before and lost. We will vigorously defend against this." [Radar Online, TMZ]
• Depeche Mode singer Dave Gahan has undergone surgery to remove a cancerous tumor from his bladder. Be well. [BBC News]
• RED ALERT! PRINCE HARRY ARRIVES IN NYC TOMORROW! GINGER CANDY FOR EVERYONE!!! [NY Daily News]
• Courtney Love "failed and refused to make payments" on her American Express cards, and the company's taking her to court, claiming she owes $352,059.67 in unpaid charges and fees. Ugh, they always get you on the fees! [E!]
• Hey, did you notice how Michael Lohan, who looooooves publicity, hid the fact that he was arrested in April for allegedly threatening to kill himself and his fiancée??? [MSNBC]
• Will you root for Michael Lohan in his "celebrity" boxing match against Johnny Fairplay? [TMZ]
• Director McG says the of the Christian Bale rant: "I'm to blame for the whole thing." Really? Do tell! "First and foremost it's my job to create a safe environment on the set at all times so that actors can explore any given emotion and always believe in the sanctity of the film… The fact it was leaked was inexcusable and I'm ashamed and embarrassed on behalf of Hollywood that that would happen. It's very unfortunate." He goes on to explain that he deliberately aggravated Bale so that his character would be more on edge: "I'm on the set getting in Christian's face… Now that's going to get him fired up in the spirit of creating a real life and death performance and that's never meant to get outside that arena… The truth is simply Christian's a good guy. Don't accuse him of being a bad guy because he's not. He loves his family, he has no entourage, he's an actor's actor and he operates from a place of passion. He'll be the first to admit, 'Wow, I flew off the handle,' but he was very much involved in what I was driving him to." [Telegraph]
• Lionel and Nicole Richie talked to CNN's Larry King in a joint interview which will air tonight. Larry asked Nicole if she's going to get married, and she said, "Eventually, yes… I think for both of us, we are going to do it because we want to, not because that's what you do." And! As a grandfather, Lionel is "very animated. He smiles like this all the time, and so he's nothing but fun for Harlow. She absolutely loves him." Larry asked Lionel if he wanted Nicole and Joel to get married, and Lionel said: "I want them to take their time. I'm more interested in whether they like each other and whether they're best friends. Because that means they'll be great parents forever." Wise man! [CNN]
• "'Jon & Kate Plus 8' madness: Why do viewers care about the Gosselins, anyway?" [NY Daily News]
• Kylie Minogue wedding rumors: Persistent. This paper says she's in Rome, among "engagement whispers." [Daily Mail]
• MSNBC Scoop's Courtney Hazlett says it should come as no surprise that voting blocs were part of the American Idol process; writing: "The bottom line is this: it was a group of organized [Kris] Allen fans who went to the trouble of getting AT&T to their viewing parties and Fox has a system in place to discard power votes." [MSNBC Scoop]
• After being with Def Jam for years — and being the CEO of that label — Jay-Z is close to signing a deal with Sony. [Reuters]
• Wait, this report says Jay-Z is in talks with Warner Music Group. [Gatecrasher]
• Eminem's album had the best first-week sales of 2009. Then again, it's been a crappy year for music. [Daily News]
• A journalist did something to upset or tease Susan Boyle, and she lost her temper in a hotel lobby. Details are sketchy. [Mirror]
• T.R. Knight will not be returning to Grey's Anatomy next season, according to sources; apparently he has been frustrated by his character's lack of storyline. [E!]
• Kelly Ripa's lawyers have sent cease and desist letters to some internet weight loss product which uses Ripa's face in its ads. [TMZ]
• Emily Blunt will be honored as British Artist of the Year at the 2009 BAFTA/LA Brittania Awards on Nov. 5. Her upcoming films include The Young Victoria and The Wolfman, with my übercrush Benicio Del Toro. Congrats! [The Hollywood Reporter]
• The Sydney Theater Company, run by Cate Blanchett and husband Andrew Upton, is experiencing a cash crisis. [Jill Zarin tried to get on Inside The Actors Studio, and James Lipton had to tell her it was for ACTORS. [Gatecrasher]
• If you would like to see a video of Kristin Cavallari "making an entrance" at Spencer and Heidi's wedding, by all means, click the link. Warning: it looks staged as all hell. [Perez]
• Gossip Girl's Chace Crawford may be hooking up with Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Esti Ginzburg. [Page Six]
• Chace Crawford on being in Footloose, the movie based on the musical based on the movie, which Zac Efron was supposed to star in: "I know Zac and we're actually friends. He's gotta make the best choice for his career at this point and I have to make the best for mine and luckily it worked out for both of us." Chace also says: "I don't know if the gymnastics [high bar] scene is going to make it. I've got some movement in me, but I'm not a dancer… I need to start stretching now." [EW]
• Tom Cruise has a job! He'll star in action comedy Wichita, with Cameron Diaz as a costar. The gist: Cruise will play a secret agent who pops in and out of the life of a single woman. Do you think they will make out? [Variety]
• "Barbra Streisand has finished building her dream house and started to think about her life." [AP]
• Do you care about Katie "Jordan" Price? Do you care about her ex-boyfriend, former boy band singer Dane Bowers? He was arrested on suspicion of drink driving after a car crash.[Independent]
• The Little Britain guys are going after Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow; David Walliams told an interviewer that in order to sort out the "important issues" of the world he had to dress like a star from Les Miserables musical and call his first born child after a piece of fruit. [The Sun]
• Something about this picture of Kelis pregnant and in a bikini makes me smile. [Concrete Loop]
• Peter Falk's wife and daughter continue to battle over conservatorship of the 81-year-old actor, who suffers from dementia. [LA Times]
• Phil Spector's lawyers are trying to get his sentence reduced. [AP]
• Blind item! "Which Great White Way star tries to rock girls he's crushing on by sending them X-rated photos of himself?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I hope this doesn't sound narcissistic because I have a supporting part in the movie, but I can't wait to see it again. I've never been a part of a movie I've so thoroughly enjoyed." — Justin Long, on the Sam Raimi thriller Drag Me To Hell. [CBS News]
• "Most of the stuff I don't tell her about, and she doesn't want to know about. She wants me to come home safe. A lot of it, she's just shook her head at. We've made a few trips to the hospital. That's how you know I am hurt, when I come home and voluntarily go by the emergency room. I've busted a few ribs and bruised my back and cracked the bone in my elbow. I think I got a concussion. It's my job." — Jesse James, who withholds information about his show Jesse James Is A Dead Man from wife Sandra Bullock. [USA Today]
• "I was really interested in seeing what the routine is, and it's really shocking, no matter what you've done, you stole, you killed or whatever, if you're in prison, everybody gets treated the same - I kinda thought that was really shocking. When they strip away your basic human rights, there's a routine of going anywhere - one door closes, another one opens. If they have a suspicion that you have anything on you, they strip-search you. You can't do what you want to do anymore. And that to me was a lot more shocking. "They don't make a difference - like he raped 58 women and killed 10 or if you didn't pay your parking tickets and you're in prison for six months, it doesn't matter, it's the same." — Diane Kruger, who researched prison life for her new French thriller Anything For Her. [Mirror]

The Good: Marion Cotillard's Poiret-esque confection may be one of the year's loveliest!


The Good: Zoe Saldana's draped ecru is Uhura-worthy, and compliments don't get higher than that.


The Good: Dita Von Teese's frock is not only delightfully cheeky, but also reminiscent of the "No Two People Have Ever Been So In Love" number from Hans Christian Anderson.


The Good: Say what one will about Peaches Geldof, she can afford some really gorgeous gowns.


The Good: Really, can you - and more to the point, Claudia Schiffer - go wrong with New Look?


The Good: Robin Wright (Penn?) is on fire this week! Clothes-wise!


The Good: Okay, Kerry Washington is teaching a master class in printed slink!


The Good: Eva Green's dramatic fuschia is so Mysteries of Udolpho!


The Good: It's hard to get "diaphanous sea nympth" right: Lily Cole does.


The Good: We've been hard on Ms. Stone this week, but it's not easy to find a gown that's both elegant, good for goose-stepping!


The Good: Love it or hate it, you gotta admit that Carine Roitfeld works this!


The Bad: Elodie Bouchez does not avoid controversy, does avoid not-creepy dresses.


The Bad: Elsa Zylberstein has revealed herself to be a master of disguise. Her schoolgirl-who-just-watched-Fassbinder-for-first-time is fool-proof!
What Say You about Yamina Benguigui's evil witch costume?


So, what do you think about Diane Kruger's Chanel 4.0?


The Ugly: Paris Hilton has - wait for it - exceeded our expectations.

[Images via Getty]

Inglourious Basterds, like many of Tarantino's other films, is an elaborate revenge fantasy, which follows a group of Jewish-American soldiers as they seek out Nazis to murder and mutilate in German-occupied France. With the name lifted from an old, little known Italian film, and inspiration drawn from spaghetti westerns, Tarantino crafts Inglourious Basterds from an interesting hodgepodge of influences, which sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. Brad Pitt plays the lead as a Tennessee-born hillbilly-turned-soldier who enjoys carving swastikas into every Nazi he encounters. While Pitt is ostensibly the star of the film, Austrian actor Christoph Waltz steals the show with his portrayal of a SS officer nicknamed the "Jew Hunter." Other big names include Dianne Kruger, Mike Myers, Rod Taylor, and Tarantino's personal friend and director of Hostel, Eli Roth. Clocking in at almost three hours, Inglourious Basterds outlives its welcome with most every critic, but some more so than others.

Let's start with the really bad before moving into "just OK" territory. The Guardian compares the film to "some colossal armour-plated turkey from hell":

Quentin Tarantino's cod-WW2 shlocker about a Jewish-American revenge squad intent on killing Nazis in German-occupied France is awful. It is achtung-achtung-ach-mein-Gott atrocious. It isn't funny; it isn't exciting; it isn't a realistic war movie, yet neither is it an entertaining genre spoof or a clever counterfactual wartime yarn. It isn't emotionally involving or deliciously ironic or a brilliant tissue of trash-pop references. Nothing like that. Brad Pitt gives the worst performance of his life, with a permanent smirk as if he's had the left side of his jaw injected with cement, and which he must uncomfortably maintain for long scenes on camera without dialogue.

And those all-important movie allusions are entirely without zing, being to stately stuff such as the wartime German UFA studio, GW Pabst etc, for which Tarantino has no feeling, displaying just a solemn Euro-cinephilia that his heart isn't in. The expression on my face in the auditorium as the lights finally went up was like that of the first-night's audience at Springtime for Hitler. Except that there is no one from Dusseldorf called Rolf to cheer us up.

Telegraph misses the blood-soaked finesse of Tarantino's earlier work:

The problem is that there's not enough roaring or headhunting. Tarantino, one of the most exceptional choreographers of blood-ballet working today, should have wielded a cleaver to whole sections of this 154-minute non-epic. There is far too much yakking, some of it thickly accented and hard to follow, most of it without the rhythmic zing of his best work. The violence – Brad Pitt as one of the Basterds wiggling his finger inside Diana Kruger's wounded leg – comes as a relief. A second plot, in which a Jewish woman whose family was butchered by Nazis organizes a film screening to assassinate Hitler and Goebbels – is more succinctly and powerfully handled.

Variety has a slightly more positive take, but still, not exactly glowing review:

While World War II has probably inspired as much fiction as any other single topic in film history, "Inglourious Basterds" is one of the few to have brazenly altered history to such an extent. Because he carefully sets up the approach at the outset, as well as through his sense of style, Tarantino gets away with it, and is in a position to fine-tune the picture before locking a final cut. Other scenes ripe for pruning are all those featuring Hitler prior to the grand finale, interludes that come off as cartoony, unconvincing and unnecessary.

In a true ensemble picture, Waltz stands head and shoulders above the rest with a lusty performance in the juiciest role. Laurent is appealingly thoughtful and observant as the young lady awaiting her chance, Fassbender cuts a dashing figure, speaks with a wonderfully clipped accent and rather resembles Daniel Day-Lewis here, and Kruger is far more engaging and animated than she's heretofore been in her big international pictures. Pitt clearly enjoys rolling his former moonshine runner's accent around in his mouth, although his performance is overly defined by constantly jutting jaw and furrowed brow. Inferring a measure of self-evaluation by Tarantino, some viewers will take exception to the film's final line, in which Aldo admires his climactic bit of brutal handiwork: "I think this just might be my masterpiece."

The Daily Beast criticizes Tarantino for being too "talky":

Inglourious Basterds fails to be a masterpiece because if you make an epic about a little topic like avenging the Jews, you need some emotion. You need a little bit of soul stuck in with the wit and the cool and the trademark film geek insider references. I don't mean you have to get verklempt. But you want someone to hate a little bit-and someone to root for. You felt something when Thurman, as the pregnant bride in Kill Bill, was shot on her wedding day and her child taken away from her. By the time she killed Bill, you wanted him dead as much as she did.

Masterpieces also need a protagonist to carry the story, or at least one who's visible. The star of this film is really Tarantino, telegraphing us in interviews prior to the film and while we watch it what a masterpiece it is while we search for someone to lead us onscreen. Pitt's energy and hilarious character helps. Waltz is a revelation. Kruger, playing a German actress and double agent named Bridget von Hammersmark gets to hold a cigarette like Marlene Dietrich and speak her native German. But there's no hero, or anti-hero, to give the film traction beyond its series of gorgeously shot, imaginatively written and acted scenes.

And finally, the most positive review, from the BBC, still isn't great:

In the words of Tarantino, it's "the power of cinema bringing down the Third Reich".

Once again, the US director has blurred film genres. Essentially it's western meets war movie, with David Bowie on the soundtrack.

And it becomes positively camp-operatic in parts - particularly in its portrayal of a shrill, semi-hysterical Adolf Hitler and British generals who could have been lifted from 'Allo, 'Allo.

Pitt may get top billing, but he's not the star of the show.

That honour goes to Christoph Waltz, a German TV star who plays SS officer Colonel Hans Landa.

Inglourious Basterds opens August 21st.

[Cannes, May 19. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Paris, May 7. Image via Splash.]