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British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
Marlee Matlin Talks About Abuse On Good Morning America
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Campaign Against Teen Dating Abuse Launched With Chris And Rihanna PSA

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BytheSea
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
British to English translation of "naturally" is "of course." He's saying, "of course they should be taught it, but..." Not "instinctively, kids should know..."
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whynotshesaid
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
Sure, children SHOULD know these things, but the fact - ooh, it's that scary f-word! - is, they don't, and a lot of parents aren't teaching them.

I could have used all of the education I could have gotten in this realm. Instead, it was just assumed that I would know these things, which is how I ended up in my fucked up situation at the age of 18.
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gherkinfiend
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
I could really have done with something like this when I was at school. My parents didn't teach me about abusive relationships because bless them, they didn't know anyone who was in one and it never occurred to them that their smart, privileged middle class daughter would ever be in one. And yet I ended up in several abusive relationships by the time I was 17...

I didn't feel I could talk to my parents, I was ashamed to tell my friends and didn't think I could contact a domestic violence charity because I didn't live with the men who were abusing me. Having been given the tools to tackle the situation at school would have been very useful indeed.

Sometimes parents just aren't equipped to deal with everything their kids encounter. What's the harm in having some support and back-up for everyone?
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alula
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
I can't take seriously anyone who non-ironically uses the term "youngsters" or, for the most part, "political correctness."

I tuned out most of my high school health class,* but I think a conversation about relationship dynamics would have been really useful, and more relevant, than a lot of what we were taught.

*although I do remember the movie in which sex was literally compared to a travelling carnival--it looks shiny and pretty and fun, but really the rides are broken and dangerous, the games are rigged, and the people serving the food didn't wash their hands. It was brilliantly ridiculous. Also, during the discussion on birth control, the options for sterilization were described as hysterectomy or castration. Uh-huh.
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whynotshesaid
11/25/09

@alula: LOL, we were taught that one of the possible side effects of having sex was suicide. Gotta love sex education that prioritizes abstinence above all else!
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Peebers says what?
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
Reminder to Margaret Morrissey and Nick Seaton: no one has to prove that they are emotionally or intellectually capable of raising a child in order to procreate. The price of this fundamental right is that there are many parents ill-equipped to deal with the subtle yet important issues like teenage abusive relationships. There are also many children being raised in emotionally/ physically abusive environments. What you are claiming children should "naturally know" is only that which an average child is able to deduce from experience and exposure to cause and effect/ behavior and reprimand. It is important that mental/physical health issues like this are address by schools and the community at large so that everyone has a chance to learn what is/is not a healthy way to interact. \\end rant
I am so glad this program has been created, and that it is being geared to boys equally with girls.
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pond-side-over
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
This is a fantastic idea - I think kids would learn more from an open, albeit carefully monitored, peer-to-peer discussion then simply adults telling them the dos and don'ts. School would be idea place for this sort of thing.

I also like the accusation of turning kids into "mini-adults," as if kids behaving responsibly and respectfully towards each other would be the downfall of society. TBH, I think there are a lot of adults who could stand to attend these classes too.
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whynotshesaid
11/25/09

@pond-side-over: I wonder if the pair of critics let their children run around naked and screaming, and if they let them eat whatever they want with their hands and throw dog poo at each other and all of the other shit I've seen children do when they are left unattended. We start socializing our kids to associate with adults and other kids as soon as we can. I'm not sure why this should be any different.
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mordicai
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
They should know this...naturally! Which is why Nature naturally prevents domestic abuse. Wait, it doesn't? Oh, someone should do something about that, then.
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LutherNipperkin
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
I'm all for this. My mom didn't offer anything in the sex ed department aside from "Don't do it, God doesn't like it" and "I have the option of pulling you out of sex ed but I'm not going to because it's good stuff." I don't think it even occurred to her to sit down and talk with me about unhealthy relationships, but even if she did, it's not something she and I would really be able to talk about.
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cinematheques
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
I think the problem here is that some parents are in denial. They think they have their child's temperaments under control and feel that some duties should be naturally delegated to them.

I wish parents could see that the overall message here is extremely positive and schools are actually looking out for their children. What schools do that nowadays? This is remarkable and yet makes me sad that it can be so poorly received.
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Plum-Pie
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
Should anyone be particularly interested, this is a really good article
about various UK schools sex ed programmes, including how they incorporate relationship education, peer-to-peer education and being a religious school.

[www.thisisgrimsby.co.uk]
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Anne
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
I really wish my school had had this. I learned all about STDs and condoms, and nothing about healthy relationships and power. I know about protection. I didn't know that what he was doing to me was really not ok.

Teach kids what abuse is. Some of them are already experiencing it but don't have a name for it, and others will experience it soon.
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MediumMac
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
Oh no, let's not be proactive and actually prevent someone being brutalized, by all means!

Because things like silence on domestic violence and birth control have worked out so well, and all. I can kind of see their point. Seriously?!

As for, "Youngsters should naturally know not to do these sort of things and must be called to account if they do," if it was so fucking obvious, we wouldn't have the statistics and victim blaming that we do now. This woman needs to read the comments left by "youngsters" re: Rhianna and Chris and then see if she can wax poetic about the pureness of today's youngsters.

Yeesh.
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Bitingpika
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
But teachers have enough to do in teaching English, maths and science to a reasonable level without addressing issues that parents should be dealing with.

Except parents often don't deal with these issues, which means the schools have to deal with bullying, assault, and harassment because it is impossible to fucking teach in an unsafe, hostile environment. Would you be able to do your phony-baloney job, Mr. Seaton, if you lived in constant fear of being hurt or humiliated? No? Well, children can't either, you utter dillweed.
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curiousgeorgiana
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
I love the idea of this program. I hope it gets implemented. There can be no harm in talking about these issues. It only empowers both boys and girls (future men and women).

Also, stop saying "political correctness" like it's a bad thing. I'm fracking sick of this nonsense. I'm not for equality because it's "political correct". I'm pro-equality because it is correct. FULL STOP.
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Diziet_Sma
11/25/09

@curiousgeorgiana: Whenever anyone starts attacking 'political correctness', I always imagine them as a frightened little bunny, scared of any change.
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curiousgeorgiana
11/25/09

@Diziet_Sma: Like this, but not as adorable and with more bigotry.
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Diziet_Sma
11/25/09

@curiousgeorgiana: Awwwww, that's far too cute to be a bigot. More like this
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curiousgeorgiana
11/25/09

@Diziet_Sma: Just a scratch.
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Diziet_Sma
11/25/09

@curiousgeorgiana: A mere flesh-wound.
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whats_in_a_name
11/25/09

In reply to British Schools To Help Kids Prevent Domestic Violence
"An unnamed contributor to the plan says that the classes would be separate from sex education"

I can understand why they're choosing to present their program in this way, but in the grand scheme of things how is this not sex ed? Not sex ed as in learning about stds and practicing putting condoms on bananas, but sex ed as in how to interact with another person within a relationship. It could just be that I've that that type of information should be included as a part of sex-ed for so long that when I see it happening I immediately conflate the two but they, at least to me, seem to be very tightly locked together.

Best of luck with your new program British school system.
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Anna N.
11/25/09

@whats_in_a_name: I wonder if not calling it sex ed is a political move to make it more palatable to parents of young children. I could see parents with a less holistic view of what sex ed constitutes not wanting their five-year-olds learning about sex.
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