• Katie Holmes doesn't see anything wrong with 3-year-old Suri wearing high heels. "Like every little girl, she loves my high heels," says Katie. "They're actually ballroom dancing shoes for kids... I found them for her and she loves them." [Us]

• Katie Holmes didn't do much cooking on Thanksgiving. "I do love to bake, but this year my sisters did all the baking and I just sort of enjoyed it," said Holmes. "I ate all of their baking!" [Extra]
• Tiger Woods won't play at the Chevron World Challenge golf tournament this week due to "injuries sustained in a one-car accident last week." He posted a statement on his website saying, "I am extremely disappointed that I will not be at my tournament this week ... I am certain it will be an outstanding event and I'm very sorry that I can't be there." [TMZ]
• A source claims Tiger Woods yelled at his wife "You've ruined our Thanksgiving! Are you happy now?" before storming out and crashing his car early Friday morning. His neighbor Joy Williamson says, "Everything has to be perfect for Tiger. Something at home must have upset him. I think he was probably just furious about something, got in that big Escalade and drove off." [Radar Online]
• The security cameras at Tiger Woods' home caught him leaving and the Florida Highway Patrol wants the tapes. [TMZ]
• Two Florida Highway Patrol troopers visited the hospital where Tiger Woods was treated on Friday morning. Witnesses say they were looking for information about his visit, though they aren't formally seeking a warrant yet. [TMZ]
• An eyewitness says at the scene of the accident Tiger Woods was unconscious on the ground and had a bloody cut on his lower lip. His wife Elin Nordgren was upset and brought out two pill bottles when EMTs asked if he was on any medications. [TMZ]
• Jude Law and Sienna Miller: Totally back on. They were offered a seat at the back of a New York restaurant on Thanksgiving night, but decided to sit in the front where everyone could see them kissing. [Perez Hilton]
• "They came in holding hands and kept touching each other and kissing throughout the entire meal," says a source. "They had no problem flaunting their love right in the middle of the restaurant. They definitely looked like they were head-over-heels for each other." [Star]
• Ojani Noa's agent threatened to file the 11 hours of racy home video he took while married to Jennifer Lopez as public evidence. J.Lo's lawyer responded that his "attempt to romanticize his threatened unlawful conduct and turn it into a Jimmy Stewart movie does not make his conduct any less illegal or make him any less culpable." He pointed out that making the videos public would violate a temporary restraining order. Both parties are due back in court tomorrow. [Radar Online]
• Chris Judd, Jennifer Lopez's other ex-husband, married Kelly A. Wolfe last week. [Us]
• There's a picture of White House party crasher Michaele Salahi attending a 2005 event for former Washington Redskins cheerleaders, but the team has no record of her being part of the squad. [TMZ]
• Countess LuAnn de Lesseps of The Real Houswives of New York said of the incident, "I was surprised that they got in. That's the most unbelievable thing: that they were able to get through. I do believe that Bravo really didn't know... I believe these people said that they were invited, they kind of made them believe that, and then they got in!" [N.Y. Magazine]
• Roman Polanski won't be released into house arrest at his Alpine chalet for a few more days, according to the French consul. Polanski still hasn't deposited his $4.5 million bail and the electronic monitors need to be set up. [Reuters]
• French diplomat Jean-Luc Faure-Tournaire visited Roman Polanski in jail today and reported, "He is in good spirits. He is very happy about how he has been treated here." [AP]
• Law enforcement sources say the decision on whether criminal charges will be made against Dr. Conrad Murray for Michael Jackson's death is "months rather than weeks away." [Reuters]
• Brittany Murphy was fired from a film she was shooting in Puerto Rico because she was being difficult on set. She was replaced by Twilight's Rachelle Lefevre. In a possibly related incident, Murphy's husband Simon Monjack got into a fight with some locals, then seemed "incoherent" when he arrived back at LAX. [Perez Hilton]
• Lady Gaga slipped at a performance in Canada. She got up immediately and kept dancing. Video here: [TMZ]
• Police say Anthony Michael Hall bit his girlfriend Diana Falzone's forehead and "pushed, shoved and spit at her" during a fight earlier this month at her apartment. The next day he came back drunk and banged on her door until police removed him. She obtained a temporary restraining order against him. [Radar Online]
• Pete Doherty has apologized for singing the Nazi anthem "Deutschland, Deutschland ueber alles" during a Munich concert that was broadcast live on Saturday. He was booed offstage and threw his mic at the moderator after she asked him to leave. "He was unaware of the controversy surrounding the German national anthem and he deeply apologizes if he has caused any offence," said Doherty's spokeswoman. [Reuters]
• Adam Shankman, the director of the upcoming film adaptation of the musical Rock of Ages, says the rumors that Miley Cyrus will star in the film aren't true. "It's way too soon," Shankman said. "I love it, though. She went to see the show and she loved it and then I had to email her and say, 'I hear you're starring in my movie. Fantastic! Congratulations!' It was just so crazy. She saw the show and that was all." [E!]
• Q: "Did you catch any flak for doing those raunchy GoDaddy commercials? Danica Patrick: "Like I said, they are incredibly successful and are growing every year. They definitely know how to direct traffic to the Web site and drive their business. I'm excited to be part of a successful company." [AdWeek]
• While speaking to a group of secondary school students at a workshop on homophobic bullying, Sir Ian McKellen said, "Being gay was a topic that was never mentioned when I was your age. We had not really invented the word gay - at school I used to be called Oscar, after Oscar Wilde. If you were gay there was nowhere to go and no one to talk to, there was no other gay person as far as I knew. So to come back to school for the first time in 50 years and see this is heartening, to see that as a nation we have so rapidly grown up. When I was 29 it was illegal for me to make love, I had a boyfriend and we slept together but the law said that we should be in prison. It was very hard to walk out in the street and say to him don't touch me or brush your hand against mine, there may be a police man around the corner." [The Telegraph]

• Lindsay Lohan channels Marilyn Monroe on the August cover of Spanish Vogue. [ONTD]
• Fornarina also decided to go another round with the actress — but in these fall ads, they Photoshopped the Lohan to look like Heather Graham. [Sun]

• Lara Stone, who looks like nobody so much as herself, says she wasn't interested in fashion before she started modeling. "I thought modeling was a big joke because I was just a funny-looking teenager." Also, she has no hobbies: "What qualifies as a hobby, anyway? I don't collect stamps." [W]
• Pixie Geldof, Alice Dellal, and Daisy Lowe all left their London agency, Select — possibly because Select closed its celebrity division, possibly because their booker, Sarah Leon, left the company. The trio were snapped up by Next. [Grazia]
• It's fairly obvious why Madonna would begin filming her new music video, "Celebrate," in Milan with her friends Domenico Dolce, Stefano Gabbana, and Jesus Luz. Less clear is why WWD would put in scare quotes what they drank on the set, "limoncello." Don't they know that's a real thing? Danny DeVito advertises it! [WWD]
• Danica Patrick is to be the next face of the watch brand Tissot. The race car driver was photographed in the rooftop swimming pool of the Soho House, and the campaign will hit men's magazines, like Details and GQ in September. Patrick's Twitter page is also sponsored by Tissot, an arrangement she says is "a great way to show my personality, unfiltered and on my terms." Presumably terms that involve lots and lots of money. [WWD]
• André Leon Talley wears monogrammed shirts and alligator loafers without socks — and his new obsession is gardening. "I don't plant. I go to auctions at Doyle and buy gardening ornaments or furniture. That's my idea of planting, it's arranging!" The occasion for this revelation was the book release party for Gloria Vanderbilt's Obsession, an erotic novel which Diane von Furstenberg compared to The Story of O. Fellow guest Salman Rushdie expressed his amazement that the 85-year-old Vanderbilt could even stomach writing an entire novel of sex scenes, which he called "very difficult" and said he used to avoid in his novels. Rushdie also hopes that "when I get around to being 85 that I'm A, able to write anything and B, that I'm still interested in sex." [NYObs]
• If you've ever wondered why there couldn't be a "natural" product for treating pimples — something with willow bark extract, say, instead of the lab-synthesized form of salicylic acid — then the new Burt's Bees acne skincare line is for you. If you grumble more at the idea of "natural" being used as if it had some kind of absolute, timeless, positive meaning than you do at the thought of spots, carry on. [WWD]
• Kylie Minogue is launching her first fragrance for men, and it's called "Inverse." [WWD]
• Pictures of Urban Outfitters' collaborations with milliner Eugenia Kim and jeweler Annie Costello Brown are out — the collections themselves will hit stores this fall. [Blackbook]
• Rumor has it that makeup artist Tom Pechaux, who frequently works his magic for the top magazines and brands, is launching his own namesake makeup line with a cosmetics company partner. [Fashionista]
• There is a picture of Catherine McNeil in a cone bra at the end of this link. Also: Bunny ears are happening. Prepare. (Link potentially NSFW) [Models.com]
• Jon Gosselin and Christian Audigier are in the throes of a full-on international bromance. (Hailey Glassman is now the former's "stylist.") [LATimes]
• Tweets from Forever 21 indicate that a magazine for the brand is in the works. [Racked]
• L'Oreal has added actress Kate del Castillo to its roster of pretty makeup-selling ladies. [UPI]
• The possible bankruptcy of lender CIT Group, which provides financing to many apparel vendors to cover their accounts receivable during the period between when they ship orders to retailers, and when the retailers pay for the goods, has many in the fashion industry alarmed. Nearly 60% of U.S. apparel and footwear makers use CIT, and squeezing out that liquidity will almost certainly drive some of them out of business. CIT owes over $1 billion and has another $10 billion coming due; a bail-out is apparently not an option. [Crain's]
• Nanette Lepore is one of those upset. "They are the only bank that still lends money to small businesses. There is no one else to take CIT's place." [HuffPo]
• Steve Madden's Australian division has gone into voluntary bankruptcy administration. [News.com.au]
• Bankrupt Eddie Bauer was bought by Golden Gate Capital for $286 million. [NYTimes]
• Joshua Walter, a 20-year-old model from Queens who walked for Hugo Boss, was arrested for his role in an alleged robbery ring. The armed five-man gang would target delis and gas stations, rob the register, and then rob all the patrons. Walter allegedly pistol-whipped one patron during a robbery at a Dunkin' Donuts. [NYP]

In the spirit of Hortense's Faceoffs, here goes:

Danica McKellar played Winnie Cooper on The Wonder Years, then went on to study math at UCLA, help prove the Chayes-McKellar-Winn theorem, become the only undergraduate to speak at a statistics conference, and write two books, Math Doesn't Suck and Kiss My Math. She also continues to act.

Danica Patrick started racing go-karts at age 10, was the first woman to win an IndyCar race, and this year placed third in the Indy 500.

Advantage: McKellar, for renaissance-womanness.

Danica McKellar posed in lingerie for Stuff, and a swimsuit for Details.

Danica Patrick posed in a bikini for Sports Illustrated (twice) and in a minidress for Playboy.

Advantage: Tough to call, but Stuff folded, so you can only find McKellar's underwear photos at places like Guns, Girls, and Other Things and, um, GolfHos.com. So, advantage goes to Patrick, I guess.

Danica McKellar did a Volkswagen commercial once, but she also did public service announcements for a Math-A-Thon to fight childhood cancer
and spoke before Congress about getting more women and minorities involved in math.

Danica Patrick played out several frat boy fantasies in her GoDaddy commercials: showering with another woman, and watching a hot female cop strip and pole-dance (this always happens when you speed).

Advantage: Hmm, taking a shower vs. doing math while fighting cancer. McKellar wins.

On girliness, Danica McKellar says,

I think that being girly, and playing with glamorous make-up and fashion is fun. I don't see anything wrong with it, as long as you don't think that it's the most important thing. [...] To all those who'd say or argue are you dumbing down math for girls?' I'd say, 'only if you think there's something inherently dumb about being girly.'

And Danica Patrick says,

There's nothing I can't do in a race car because I'm a girl. These days I love being a girl.

Advantage: Both seem comfortable with both their sexuality and their chosen career. Draw.

On intelligence, Danica McKellar says,

I certainly want to do my part to show girls that the more you develop your intelligence, the better equipped you're going to be able to handle the decisions you'll be making in your life. And hopefully you'll make better decisions, and not think that you need to be reckless and irresponsible in order to be glamorous.

And,

To all those who'd say or argue are you dumbing down math for girls?' I'd say, 'only if you think there's something inherently dumb about being girly.'

But Danica Patrick says,

I've never claimed to be a handy person. [...] I used to be able to do a lot of stuff. I'm sure I still could, but I play dumb and say I don't know how. It's easier when you don't have to do it.

Advantage: McKellar.

The verdict: While McKellar's Stuff spread crosses the line between being comfortable with your body and using it to further your brand, her brand still has a lot more substance than Patrick's. Both women inhabit sort of uncomfortable territory — by being sexy and successful, are they showing girls merely that it's possible to be both, or that they must be both? McKellar is more firmly in the former camp, spending a lot more time telling girls they can achieve — and achieving herself — than she does posing, showering on television, or talking to Sports Illustrated about not wearing underwear. And while Patrick's image may have something to do with the sexist nature of sports culture (Sports Illustrated asked her about underwear, after all), she seems to be buying into this culture wholeheartedly. McKellar's not perfect, but of the two Danicas, we'd still rather see her on a teen girl's wall.

What Danica Patrick Could Do for Nascar, Sponsors [AdAge]
Danica McKellar [Official Site]
Danica Patrick's Q&A [Sports Illustrated]
Danica Patrick 20Q Interview [Playboy]
Danica McKellar [Wikipedia]
Danica McKellar Interview [UGO.com]
Danica Patrick Shower Commercial For The SuperBowl 2009 [YouTube]
Speeding - Internet Only [Commercial, GoDaddy.com]

[Indianapolis, May 8. Image via Getty]

INDIANAPOLIS - MAY 08: Danica Patrick drives of the #7 Motorola Andretti Green Racing Dallara Honda during practice for the IRL IndyCar Series 93rd running of the Indianapolis 500 on May 8, 2009 at Indianapolis Motor Speedway in Indianapolis, indiana. (Photo by Jonathan Ferrey/Getty Images)

Sports Illustrated group editor Terry McDonell says this photo was selected for the cover because Refaeli's hair, swimsuit, and visible freckles make this photo "natural," according to Yahoo News. He adds, "Her body is amazing and she looks intelligent." Israeli-born Refaeli, who (until now) was best known as Leonardo DiCaprio's girlfriend, said she had a special feeling about this particular shot too. "This is the one I felt the most comfortable with," said Refaeli, "I liked that the top of the suit was on."

Her miniscule bikini top is technically on, though it seems like any slight movement on her part could change that. But what of the bottom? Was there really so much fabric that it needed to be rolled down so the world can see the extent of her bikini wax?

The "removing the bikini bottoms" shot is nothing new for the Swimsuit Edition. Tyra Banks was the first Swimsuit Edition model to put the pose on the cover in 1997.

And just last year Marisa Miller looped her thumb under the string of her bikini, suggesting that though topless, she longed to be wearing even less.

Throughout the new magazine, bikini bottoms are being yanked down or are almost non-existent to start with, according to Back in Skinny Jeans. As evidenced by this galllery of previous covers, the magazine has been looking more and more like Playboy over the years. McDonell explains the cover is just a reflection of the "athleticism and sexiness of the culture" at the time. The "athleticism" in the new issue is mostly supplied by Indy Car driver and GoDaddy spokeswoman Danica Patrick who once again is featured half naked in a bikini, this time draped over the hood of a car.

We actually prefer the "sexiness" supplied by the culture of 70s. In 1970, supermodel Cheryl Tiegs was cold and refused to remove her long-sleeved top or sunglasses when the photographer asked her to take them off. The cover below is evidence that the Swimsuit Edition and our idea of sexiness has changed a lot over the years.

We'll have our Anonymous Model, Tatiana, weigh in on this tomorrow.

[Images via SI Vault Covers.]

SI Cover Girl Refaeli Nudges Her Swimsuit South [Yahoo]
Is The 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover Too Risque or Not? [Back In Skinny Jeans]

As the New York Times reports, the ads this year were mostly a letdown, relying on the same gimmicks used in Super Bowl ads again and again over the past 20 years... including sexist portrayals of women.

The ad below, for GoDaddy.com, features race car driver Danica Patrick at a "major league enhancement hearing."

The Bridgestone tire commercial below is both sexist and tarnishes the reputation of a beloved children's toy, Mr. Potato Head. The concept of getting a nagging wife to shut her trap is so unoriginal it's hard to imagine even the Mad Men of Sterling Cooper coming up with such a tired concept.

But the most sexist ad of the night was the Teleflora.com ad, in which a woman gets a box of flowers that starts insulting her because she owns a cat and reads romance novels. The flowers end with the exclamation, “Nobody wants to see you naked.”

As Wired's Ken Denmead puts it, "We like a bit of off-color fun once in a while. But these ads were so full of violence, cruelty, and sexism that something needs to be said."

Your turn, in the comments.

Ads That Pushed Our Usual (Well-Worn) Buttons [New York Times]
The 4 Worst Superbowl Ads by Quarter [Wired]

[Daytona Beach, FL. January 24. Image via WENN.]

• None other than the National Fisheries Institute has responded to Entourage actor Jeremy "Thermometer" Piven's claims that he has suffered from mercury poisoning.

The organization says: "People in Japan eat 154 pounds of fish a year on average. If Piven ate 6 ounces of fish a day for his whole life, he'd still eat less than the average Japanese. Despite this, there is no public health concern about mercury in Japan." [YouTube]

• The good news? We have more info about Amy Poehler's new sitcom: She'll play a mid-level bureaucrat in an Indiana city parks and recreation department who's looking to get ahead. It's a "comedic take on how government works in an American town." The bad news? It doesn't start until April. [AP]
• Hollywood will descend on Washington, D.C. for the inauguration festivities. Between the Creative Coalition party, the MoveOn.org bash, the Huffington Post party and the DNC Hispanic Caucus Gala, the town will host Sting, Adrian Grenier, Anne Hathaway, Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins, Trudie Styler, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Peter Saarsgaard, Rosario Dawson, Michael Stipe, Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez, Halle Berry, Sheryl Crow, Tom Hanks, Ed Harris and Ron Howard, among others. Oh, and, of course, Oprah. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Aretha Franklin loves Barack Obama! She says: “I heard him sing a fabulous version of "Chain Of Fools" at an event in Detroit last year. He has a good, melodic voice.” [Daily Express]
• Beyoncé will sing for the Obamas' first inaugural dance. Will it be a version of Etta James' "At Last"? [Concrete Loop]
• Sigh: The end of the Bush administration means the end of David Letterman's "Great Moments In Presidential Speeches." There will be a retrospective tonight! [AP]
• What's up with the Sex And The City sequel? Even though Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Cattrall seem to think the next flick is a realistic possibility, Chris Noth "doesn't think it's gonna happen" and Evan "Harry Goldenblatt" Handler says: "I have no idea whether it will happen or not." Maybe there are no dudes in part 2? [E!]
• Toni Colette says of United States Of Tara: "When I read the script, it was like a juicy page-turner that was full of surprises, and it made me laugh out loud. It was very moving, and as soon as I finished reading it, I was like, 'Yep, I'm doing it.'" The series starts Sunday! [USA Today]
• Uh-oh: Hollywood studios are going to cut back on the lucrative pay deals movie stars get due to a decline in DVD sales. This is how it starts! Next thing you know, you're merely rich instead of incredibly wealthy. [FT]
• St. Lucia's Tourism Minister is thanking Amy Winehouse for bringing publicity to the Caribbean island; he says every picture shows Winehouse smiling or interacting with the locals, and the overall impact has been positive. "Any edge that you can get, you hang on to it," says Allen Chastanet. [Mirror]
• Lance Bass has been talking about a 'N Sync reunion, but JC Chasez says: "No. We haven't discussed anything like that. I don't know. Honestly, I can't speak for him or as to why he would say that but I know nothing about one." Ouch. Tearin' up my heart! [Perez]
• Little Edie enthusiasts: How do we feel about this "first look" at Drew Barrymore and Jessica Lange in Grey Gardens? [Just Jared]
• Lily Allen has done this before, but she recently showed Dutch TV her third nipple. In addition, she reveals she has a Homer Simpson tattoo, but when she finds out that Krusty The Clown also has a superfluous nipple, you can almost see her thinking "Dammit, maybe I should have gotten the clown." Click for video! [Perez]
• Oh, Lily Allen is not wearing pants on the cover of Spin. [ONTD]
• Isla Fisher's eyebrows sorta jump out at you from the cover of Allure, but maybe that's due to the nude lip? [ONTD]
• A dude who runs a head shop talks about how Brad Pitt used to come in all the time. "He came in once and was excited about smoking with one of his very big-name co-stars. 'We blaze (smoke pot) every day in his trailer,' Brad boasted. He had a huge grin on his face." [ONTD]
• Edie Falco is coming back to TV: She'll shoot a Showtime series called Nurse Jackie, which airs this summer. And! She might return to 30 Rock as Jack's love interest, even though she says when she first worked on the show: "I was actually very scared. You watch Alec Baldwin and Tina Fey; it's like they are speaking Swahili. It's like, 'What the hell is this?' " [E!]
• Conan O'Brien will officially be out of work come February 20, and Jimmy Fallon starts March 2. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Cindy McCain was supposed to be on Dancing With The Stars, but John put the kibosh on it? [Page Six]
• Blind item! "What funnyman’s wife caught him in bed with another man? Sister straight-up dumped her dude after catching that class act." [Gatecrasher]
• So. The Gossip Girl spinoff. A teen romance between Lily van der Woodsen and Rufus Humphrey. Set in the '80s, in the L.A. music scene. Could be awesome, could be awful. [Gatecrasher]
• Whoops, Whoopi Goldberg accidentally called Josh Brolin James at an awards show. [Gatecrasher]
• Whitney Houston will perform at Clive Davis' pre-Grammy party? We want to see! [Page Six]
• Ugh: Why the hell is accomplished race car driver Danica Patrick showering in this web domain commercial? [USA Today]
• This paper says of Kylie Minogue's new Spanish hunk, who sorta looks like Olivier Martinez: "He's tall with smouldering Latin looks and a fear of commitment. Is it true love for Kylie or DEJA PHEW!" [The Sun]
• Casey Affleck is directing a documentary feature on Joaquin Phoenix, his friend and brother-in-law. Phoenix's new career? He is becoming a rapper, and his album will be produced by Sean Combs. This is not a joke. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Sean Combs says of the Notorious BIG movie: "My experiences with Biggie happened when we were still young, and to be honest, it was kind of weird to see myself that way on screen." [WSJ]
• Howie Mandel says that since he's a germaphobe, being in the hospital for an irregular heartbeat was very difficult: "I wouldn't put on the gown or the customary clothing. I remained clothed and in my boots on the gurney and in the hospital!" [People]
• Billy Ray Cyrus was seen riding his motorcycle without a helmet in L.A., which is illegal. Doesn't he know the helmet gives you anonymity? Ask Brad Pitt! [Perez]
• Congrats to Monica Seles, who was elected to the International Tennis Hall of Fame yesterday. [UPI]
• TV adventure man Bear Grylls and his wife Shara have a new baby boy: Huckleberry Edward Jocelyne Grylls. Welcome to the world, Huck. [People]
• Aerosmith's in Venezuela and Joe Perry's in the hospital; he had a knee replacement last March and suddenly needed a second operation, stat. [E!]
• By the by, Steven Tyler says he and Joe Perry never battled over women: "Well, we didn’t compete, but we did share. And the crabs won." He also says his first sexual experience: "was at the age of seven with twins." And the band had a rule: "You didn’t have sex for 10 days at the end of tour, but that was so you’d be sure to go home with a full cup of chowder." As the kids say: Vom. [ONTD]
• Oh dear, is there bullying going on in the Celebrity Big Brother house? And is Coolio at the center of it? A communications watchdog organization is investigating. [The Sun]
• Boy George will be sentenced today for falsely imprisoning a male escort. He could get three months in jail or 300 hours of community service. [Daily Express]
• Guy Ritchie was seen dining at a NYC restaurant and not paying attention to the table full of "young model types" he was with. [Page Six]
• Nostalgia alert: The Trumps used to race the Kennedys on the ski slopes. [Page Six]
• "The reality is that Kids was my first film, and when I did it people thought that I was like the character, and that is one of the reasons that Spike Lee wanted to hire me for He Got Game. When he met me and saw that I wasn't that person he appreciated that I had actually acted in that part, and he was really great with me and forced me to be stronger in my acting." — Rosario Dawson. [Independent]
• "I still love everybody that I’ve ever had a relationship with. I am friends with them all. When I met Chris [Robinson] it was like nothing else. I had no question that I was going to have a kid with him. Every rule went out the window. We were telling each other we loved each other by the fourth day and I moved in within a week. I had no question that we were going to get married. He’s still a permanent fixture in my life, But I believe our love changed its form, it shifted. I don’t think we were meant to be married, but I think we were meant to have a child and we have this amazing little boy together – therefore we’ll be together our entire lives. Whoever he ends up with, whoever I end up with, we’ll always be together." — Kate Hudson. [Mirror]
• "I have never really understood how I should feel or behave in a relationship,” the former child star reveals. “I didn’t have the kind of childhood or family life that would have given me any perspective on what a happy home or relationship would feel like. So I haven’t had as much success in my relationships as I would have liked… You can’t live your life blaming your failures on your parents and what they did or didn’t do for you. You’re dealt the cards that you’re dealt. I realised it was a waste of time to be angry at my parents. The best thing I can do is use all the things I’ve learned from them, good and bad, have my own family someday and just keep on going." — Drew Barrymore[Mirror]
• "Every time you buy a Nirvana record, part of that money is not going to Kurt's child, or to me, it's going to a handful of Jew loan officers, Jew private banks, it's going to lawyers who are also bankers." — Ladies and gentlemen: Ms. Courtney Love. [Page Six]

The Good:
As Christian Siriano would say (first and last time, I promise), Posh looks so Audrey I can't stand it.
I'm sure it says something terrible about me that when Lauren Conrad wore this exact same Dolce & Gabbana to the Dark Knight premiere, I made her a "Bad." But somehow it works on Michelle Kwan!
I should admit here that I've never watched One Tree Hill. Yet for some reason I've always liked Sophia Bush, who always seems to look far more elegant than anyone would expect.
Lisa Leslie knows how to work her long lines.
College softball player Angela Tincher looks adorable and summery.

The Bad:
Obviously, Kate Walsh is stunning — but what's with the Malibu Barbie costume?
I feel kinda bad calling out poor Alan Thicke's wife — but then, she's not exactly trying to fly under the radar with this one.
I have the non-driver's reverence for racer Danica Patrick, and I totally get wanting to wear the most inappropriate driving shoes on your day off. But the look's just not working, and GW-style, I cannot tell a lie.
Kourtney Kardashian seems to kind of want to go classy with this one. But she's conflicted about that desire.
Brittny Gastineau is not troubled by any such conflicts. She makes her priorities clear. Also her breasts.

The Ugly:
Now here, my friends, is a dilemma. Will the prize go to:
Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson...
Fellow GND Bridget Marquardt
...or Playboy model Sara Jean Underwood?

Images via Getty

The Good:
Christine Lahti looks classy in her red shift, albeit somewhat stiff.


Danica Patrick's dress is exactly what "flirty and feminine" should be.


Faye Dunaway is still rocking her Bonnie and Clyde look. But whatever: It works for her.


Fred Durst's ladyfriend has a pretty dress.


Is it weird that I would like Holland Taylor's dress? It's so old-school cool.


I'll take Maggie Grace's Audrey Hepburn-esque dress too, thanks.


What a relief to see a starlet not in a boob-flaunting dress. Thanks, Kristen Bell.


Please God let these be Lorne Michaels' daughters.


Molly Shannon's mod-styled dress and cutie-pie husband are both winners in my book.


Rachel Dratch once helped me hide when the Arctic Monkeys' publicist attempted to throw me out of a Saturday Night Live after-party. Her sweet dress is clearly a representation of her sweet-as-can-be disposition.


Tina Fey is like an old-fashioned glamor girl in this dress. (So why can't she seem to relax and enjoy it?)


The Bad:
Honestly, Amy Poehler's dress could be indeed hiding a bump.


Annabella Sciorra is bordering on caricature in the vampy dress and tousled bedroom waves.


Though I love Padma, I do not approve of her styled-by-Lauren-Conrad-esque look.


Sigourney Weaver: The elementary school art teacher you never knew you had.


The Ugly:
Dear Alice Kremelberg: Your moccasin booties sure do look comfy. But why are you wearing them outside of your house?

[Images via Getty.]

• Britney is doing another episode of How I Met Your Mother. Mere weeks after Neil Patrick Harris said he didn't want the pop star back! "Our show does not need stunt casting in order to succeed," he said in early April. Today's report claims "the show is ecstatic and so is Britney." [People]
  
• Prince William landed a military helicopter in his girlfriend's yard. Not exactly Standard Operating Procedure. [AP]
  
• Lindsay Lohan supported Samantha Ronson as Sam DJ'd at the Hawaiian Tropic Zone in Times Square. She danced and "really got into the music." Oh, and she was drinking. [People]
  
• Sandra Bullock and husband Jesse James were hit by a drunk driver Friday night in Gloucester, MA. No one was injured; the couple walked away from the accident. The woman driving the Subaru that jumped lanes and hit Bullock and James blew a .20 on the Breathalyzer - two and a half times the legal limit. [People]
  
• Kirsten Dunst and Ryan Gosling were making out at a New York City club. It's on. [Perez Hilton]

• There's a rumor that Paris Hilton wants to have a double wedding with Nicole Richie, so they can sell pictures from the ceremony and make millions. A rep says it's not true; we sorta suspect Paris would if she could, but Nicole ain't having it. [Page Six]
• Justin Timberlake and John Mayer attended the memorial service for Cameron Diaz' father on Sunday. A source says hardly anyone wore black to the service in Seal Beach: "Lots of people were wearing Hawaiian shirts. It looked more like a party." [People]
• Still-jailed Pete Doherty's been evicted from his nine-bedroom mansion (?!?!) because the landlord found blood on the walls and a stench from Pete's abandoned cats. [Mirror]
• Oh, and since there were reports that Pete was doing drugs in jail, authorities raided prison cells. They found stashes of heroin and cocaine. Sigh. [UPI]
• Jessica Simpson doesn't need hair and makeup people around 24/7 because Tony Romo likes her casual. Eyeroll. [MSNBC]
• Harrison Ford decided to pierce his ear years back after a "semi-drunken lunch with Ed Bradley and Jimmy Buffett, who were both wearing earrings." [Page Six]
• Madonna is asking the court in Malawi to delay her adoption hearing because she has business in the US to take care of. (Promoting her new album?) [Reuters]
• Gross! Some dude stole the bottom half of a replica of Jenna Jameson's body from an adult store in Fullerton, CA. I don't even want to know what he plans to do with it. [UPI]
• Kelly Clarkson sang for the pope, yawn. [People]
• Enrique Iglesias says he's been trying to get Anna Kournikova to marry him for years. Anna says: "I'm never getting married. Everything is good." [People]
• Pictures of Miley Cyrus in her bra are circulating? Is that legal? [Perez Hilton]
• Shia LaBeouf doesn't know how to pick up girls. [Page Six]
• Elisabeth Hasselbeck is a Bret Michaels fan? LOL. The lure of the weave! [Page Six]
• Naomi Campbell: Seen smiling and being friendly at Heathrow airport. [Page Six]
• Marla Maples, 44, has been seen making out with Andy Baldwin, 31, who was on The Bachelor. Get it girl! [Page Six]
• Amy Winehouse's Bond theme is "going to be a classic," sources say. Bring it on! [Mirror]
• A new biography of Heath Ledger claims Naomi Watts wanted to have his baby. [News.com.au]
• The jerk who told John Travolta and Tom Cruise that he was Heath Ledger's dad says he's not sorry because he doesn't remember doing it. Also: He has more than 40 convictions for deception, including pretending to the The Rock to get free soccer tickets. [The Sun]
• Jennifer Aniston was on Oprah's Big Give. Did anyone watch? [People]
• Jude Law's son Rafferty, 11, will play the younger version of Jude's character in a sci-fi flick, Repossession Mambo, that comes out next year. [Mirror]
• Eli Manning married his college sweetheart, Abby McGrew, in Mexico on Saturday. [People]
• Another wedding: Tia Mowry from Sister, Sister married actor Cory Hardrict in Santa Barbara on Sunday. [People]
• Waitresses from Olive Garden, naked in Playboy??!! Cue loss of appetite. [Page Six]