A&E IndieFilms, in addition to bringing us documentaries like Jesus Camp and co-producing The September Issue, is owned by Hearst Entertainment and Syndication. Hearst Entertainment and Syndication, as the name might suggest, is owned by Hearst. What else is owned by Hearst? Vogue competitor Harper's Bazaar, Glamour doppelganger Marie Claire, and a raft of other direct pendants to Condé Nast media properties. It's not clear that A&E IndieFilms' ownership status meant that anyone at Hearst enjoyed editorial control or creative influence over The September Issue, it is surprising that Condé Nast would accidentally put itself in its rival's hands.

And it does fit with reports that the documentary is notably harsher on Anna Wintour than previously thought.

Fashion Week Daily acquired a copy of the documentary, which isn't to be released in the U.S. and U.K. until September 11, and posted a detailed recap of its contents on the Friday before the long U.S. Memorial Day weekend. Cutler opens with a long discourse from Wintour, defending fashion on intellectual grounds, and calling people who criticize the fashion industry frightened:

"What I often see is that people are scared of fashion — because they're frightened or insecure, so they put it down. On the whole, people who say demeaning things about our world, I think it's because they feel in some way excluded or not part of the "cool group." Just because you like to put on a beautiful Carolina Herrera dress of a pair of J Brand blue jeans instead of something basic from K-Mart doesn't mean you're a dumb person. There is something about fashion that can make people very nervous."

It's often those who themselves are most desperate to be taken seriously who are quickest to project "insecurity" onto others. Perhaps it isn't a coincidence that Cutler, when he succeeds in getting Wintour to talk about her family, admits that her fellow high-achieving siblings — Patrick Wintour, political editor of the Guardian, Nora Wintour, deputy-general secretary of the Public Services International union, and James Wintour, an official with the Gravesham Borough Council who works in low-income housing — all regard her work with, she believes, "amusement."

What seems to emerge as a theme of the film, however, is Anna Wintour's relationship with Vogue stylist and former model Grace Coddington. Coddington, unhappy about the documentary team, threatened to quit the magazine and resisted Cutler's attempts to film her for months, the director recalled. (Coddington eventually relented, and Cutler's team's presence at one of her shoots led to a charming picture of Caroline Trentini and a cameraman, jumping together for an editorial.)

Wintour says that the cameraman's stomach needs retouching. "You need to go to the gym!" she says, not remotely in jest. (This is the woman who ordered Oprah to drop 20 lbs before shooting her for the cover, and who bullied André Leon Talley into taking up tennis, a sport he is filmed pursuing while decked out in Damon Dash pants, a Polo Ralph Lauren shirt, a vintage diamond Piaget watch, a Louis Vuitton towel, a Louis Vuitton racquet cover, and a Louis Vuitton gym bag.) Coddington rejects Wintour's criticism of the cameraman's body — "Everybody isn't perfect in this world. It's enough that the models are perfect. You don't need to go to the gym" — but she waits for her boss to leave the room before airing her disagreement.

The film also apparently gives an unprecedentedly detailed look at Wintour's managerial style and her level of involvement with the magazine. Wintour retains absolute creative control over every editorial shot. She does not shy from killing spreads by talented and proven long-time collaborators, such as Edward Enninful (Coddington's story with Trentini is a re-shoot of an Enninful effort) and Coddington herself. "I'm in a really foul mood right now because they've just killed another spread of my '20s story, and they're about to kill another one," says Coddington, at one point. "And they're all lying to me about it. It's just incredibly boring."

She also kills a spread with models Hilary Rhoda and Chanel Iman, jumping. (This was during Vogue's long, just-ended drought of faces of color on its editorial pages — it's interesting to note that Iman, who is black, was even in the running for inclusion in American Vogue in September 2007.)

It's no wonder, really, that her publication's creativity so often ends up channeled into the inevitable jumping editorial, the inevitable lavish-but-boring set piece. Wintour's nit-picking leaves even the talented eyes and minds around her too hamstrung to function.

If the full film is as critical as FWD maintains, then that means Anna Wintour has made one move worthy of respect: allowing Cutler to film her, no-holds-barred. But will Condé Nast be pleased at the results?

The September Issue, Revealed! [FWD]
More Details from The September Issue Vogue Documentary Featuring Anna Wintour and Grace Coddington [Fashionologie]
Hearst Takes On Condé [FWD]
Film reveals soft side to Vogue's icy style queen Anna Wintour [Guardian]

Earlier:
Vogue Documentary Is Delicious & Devil-ish

• Victoria Beckham reportedly owns 100 Birkins, with a $2 million value. Although Posh's penchant for the carryalls isn't in question, we do nonetheless note this story has two pictures of her holding Kellys. [Daily Mail]

• Right after settling the lawsuit brought against it by Woody Allen to the tune of a cool $5 mil, American Apparel released its quarterly results. And they were less than glowing. In the period ended March 31, the fashion giant lost $9 million, as operating costs rose 21%, to $69.3 million, and sales grew only 2.4%, to $114.3 million. Company stock fell by 20% during yesterday's trading. Because of the classification of its revolving credit facility as a long-term obligation, American Apparel may also be obligated to restate its previous financial statements. It has already reduced its full-year sales forecast by $25-$50 million. [Reuters]
• Michelle Obama cut the ribbon on the renovated American Wing of the Metropolitan Museum of Art wearing a purple Isaac Mizrahi sheath. Oscar de la Renta was heard to sob quietly into his pocket square. [WWD]
• Then, she went to the American Ballet Theatre's spring gala at the Metropolitan Opera House, where she wore an Azzedine Alaïa dress and a Thakoon jacket. Earlier, at the museum, she said: "The arts are not just a nice thing to have or to do if there is free time or if one can afford it. Rather, paintings and poetry, music and fashion, design and dialogue, they all define who we are as a people and provide an account of our history for the next generation." [AP]
• Anna Wintour's office chairs, glimpsed briefly in the 60 Minutes segment that aired Sunday, have been ID'd: they are classics of Art Deco design, and cost $250 apiece. [UnBeige]
• Brüno has a Twitter account, and you can expect Tweets in the character's voice until the movie hits theaters on July 10 (it is, naturally, a marketing effort). For now, enjoy witticisms such as: "Am I ze most gifted Austrian ever? Let's just say zat at 14 ich could play Rock Me Amadeus on ze flute. Falco didn't write it til he vas 29." And: "Ze vorld ist zo screwed up - vhy do zey give out Nobel Prizes for physics, medicine und svimming, but not for fashion?" [Brüno's Twitter]
• Isabel and Ruben Toledo, fashion designer and fashion illustrator, respectively, were honored with the André Leon Talley Lifetime Achievement Award at the Savannah College of Art and Design's annual fashion show. Talley told the crowd, "The Toledos represent a quarter century of love and brand building. They're like two oaks, branches intertwined forever." [Reuters]
• In other awards-show effusions, Betsey Johnson compared New York Fashion Week head Fern Mallis to David Bowie and Mick Jagger as she presented her with Parsons' AAS Icon Award. When students in the Associates in Applied Science fashion marketing program got a little rowdy, Johnson quieted them with four words: "I'm looking to hire." [WWD]
• For a taste of how the Valentino half lives, imagine this: fireplaces ablaze out of season, air conditioners running, and uniformed manservants depositing cool glasses of water onto linen napkins. Also: secret buttons inside the bookshelves. [Guardian]
• Marc Ecko has announced he'll be doing co-branded collections with DC Comics, incorporating the characters of Batman and the Rogues Gallery. Perhaps the superheroes can save his troubled business? [WWD]
• Burberry, in the year ended March 31, lost $9 million. Its core earnings fell 13%, but annual sales rose 21%. The main reason for the loss was a company write-down that cost £116 million. The brand, which has already laid off 800 workers, still expects to open 10-15 stores this year. [WSJ]
• Yesterday, we included a Rag Trade item, sourced to WWD, about designer Erin Fetherston. Fetherston was reported to be making a short film about her fall collection in New York's West Village, starring Juliette Lewis with music by Damon Dash, and her husband, the artist Hedi Firjani, told WWD that Fetherston was looking to launch a line with QVC, probably timed to coincide with New York Fashion Week this September. Both are untrue, according to Fetherston's PR rep, who contacted us shortly after we published. Fetherston is making a film, with director Marisa Crawford, but Juliette Lewis isn't the star. And the deal with QVC is not confirmed.

• Gwyneth Paltrow has tired of the cosmetics contract gravy train; no longer shall the actress concentrate on embodying the qualities of the Estée Lauder brand. Instead, she'll be the new, white Oprah! [Daily Mail]

• Nanette Lepore has added her voice to the save the garment center chorus. [HuffPo]
• According to Jesus Luz's Brazilian agent, Sergio Mattos, Luz was paid $100 for the two-day Steven Klein shoot with Madonna that ended up in W. Let me say this one more time: that kind of pay is entirely standard for an editorial shoot, no matter one's modeling experience or industry status. [NY Post]
• Christina Aguilera looks, um, Photoshopped to high hell in the new Stephen Webster jewelry campaign. [Sun]
• Jerry Hall got a $750,000 advance from HarperCollins to write a memoir that would include full details on her life with Mick Jagger. But the manuscript Hall rendered proved too tame and cagey on the subject of Jagger for the publisher's taste; the supermodel has agreed to return the advance. (Side note: how many times do you get to read a word like "priapic" in the Daily Mail?) [Daily Mail]
• Terry Richardson just shot next year's Pirelli calendar in Trancoso, Bahia, Brazil. Georgina Stojiljkovic, Catherine McNeil, Abbey Lee Kershaw, and Daisy Lowe are purported to be featured, along with actual Brazilians Gracie Carvalho and Ana Beatriz Barros. Glamurama got a NSFW snap of Richardson in action, shooting a topless McNeil on a white horse. [Glamurama via Fashionologie]
• Supposedly, Zac Posen is in the early stages of producing a scripted series for the CW network about the equestrian world. Might be a wise move to diversify, as we keep hearing wild rumors that his label is in trouble. [The Cut]
• Erin Fetherston is also shooting a short film this week, starring Juliette Lewis, and her fall collection. Music is by Damon Dash. Her husband also confirmed that the designer will launch a line for home-shopping giant QVC this fall, probably during fashion week. [WWD]
• Stacey Bendet Eisner — yes, last year she married the son of that Eisner — is the designer behind Alice + Olivia. And she says there are exciting things to come for the brand, including an expanded line of embellished t-shirts, a jewelry line with Erickson Beamon coming out this November, and a possible cosmetics deal. [Blackbook]
• Macy's says not to expect deep markdowns this season — but it does want a lower-priced outlet store bearing its name, since Saks and Nordstrom both have them. [WWD]
• Douglas Reker, one of the bracingly new designers I'm personally most excited about, has just been picked up for fall by Barneys Coop. [Crain's]
• Now that Lakshmi Menon — two-time Indian Vogue covergirl — has had her only-girl editorial debut in American Vogue, industry commentators wonder aloud: Why has it taken so long for a South Asian supermodel to emerge? Sarah Doukas of London mega-agency Storm says it's because Indians are culturally conservative and don't want their daughters modeling; Menon says agencies don't have scouting networks on the subcontinent, and if you don't look for something, of course you won't find it. [Independent]
• England's National Trust is in talks to buy the home of the late designer Laura Ashley. [Telegraph]
• Leigh Lezark, who is a member of this preposterous thing called the MisShapes, but who nonetheless finds time in her busy schedule to "model", might be Matthew Williamson's new muse. Because a perpetually black-clad stony-stared New Yorker would be the perfect match for his exuberant tastes. [Fashionista]
• Rosa Chá, which is just about the best-looking and best-fitting swimwear out there, barring perhaps Norma Kamali, and therefore heartbreaking for its extravagant price, is losing its founding designer, Amir Slama. Slama, who launched Rosa Chá over two decades ago, is going to start a namesake swim collection. Brazilian Alexandre Herchcovitz will take over at Rosa Chá. [WWD]
• Diego Della Valle, the head of Italian leather goods brand Tod's, has doubled his investment stake in Saks Fifth Avenue, to 5.9%. [WWD]
• Alberta Ferretti, Moschino, and Pollini are all lowering their prices. Their parent company, Italy's Aeffe SpA, experienced steep losses in the first quarter of this year, and has thus formulated a cost-cutting plan that is intended to save $13.6 million over the course of 2010. In addition to lowering prices, Aeffe is shrinking its collections and planning layoffs. [WWD]

• "Rumors are swirling" that Marc Jacobs and boyf may be adopting a baby girl. [New York]
• Damon Dash and Rachel Roy are divorcing. [NY Daily News]
• Why is Nicole Richie dressed as Lady Gaga? [BlackBook]

• Oy. Barneys eliminates 76 positions. [WWD]
• Tiffany's profits are down...although not as low as people expected! Silver linings...? [NYT]
• This 30-something reporter is worried that she's too old for "sheers." We feel her pain! "Then there is the problem of the sheer panel. You know the sort - where one five-inch peekaboo slot has the ability to make a slick cocktail dress look startlingly cheap." [Daily Mail]
• And another one down: menswear designer Mark Shale files for bankruptcy. [WWD]
• Lady Gaga has totally ripped off Hussein Chalayan's bubble dress. But they should feel honored! Besides, the original covers the vagina, a problem with Mme. Gaga rectified. [New York]
• Fashion types are awfully excited at the news of Marni's new summer capsule collection, which will feature "Marni's unmistakable abstract prints and block colour panels feature on easy-to-wear T-shirt dresses, casual jackets and mannish trousers." [ElleUK]
• So when she says, "her husband," is Michelle Obama really talking about "the media?" M.O. says: "He's always asking: ‘Is that new? I haven't seen that before.' It's like, Why don't you mind your own business? Solve world hunger. Get out of my closet." [New York Times via Fashionista]
• Taking the pulse of the times, Margiela opens a German flagship: "Eight white rickshaws and 10 white bikes ferried guests from the new shop on Maximilian Strasse to the art museum, while those who preferred to walk had only to follow the white Tabi toe-sock footprints and white helium balloons pointing the way." [WWD]
• Speaking of which: we can add nothing to this quote from VogueUK: "The yummy mummy enclave of London's W10 is set to become even yummier with the addition of Burberry's first UK childrenswear store on Westbourne Grove. [VogueUK]
• Fashion parties, on the other hand, are feeling the pinch: "At a recent soiree, there was a strict one tipple per guest rule." Accordingly, fashionistas are packing flasks. We know that game. [Fashionista]
• Patrick Robinson asserts, again, that he's changing the image of the Gap. Visits to the store fail to back this up. [VogueUK]
• Clarins is opening a series of in-department-store spas. [WSJ]

• Rihanna's maybe moving on! But: She was seen getting cozy with Wilmer Valderrama. Isn't that dude bad news bears? He's been linked to Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Ashlee Simpson, Mandy Moore… [Mirror]

• So you know how Lindsay Lohan has a new Maserati? It's already been in a minor car accident. LL wasn't driving — her assistant hit a Subaru in front of them. [Just Jared]
• Is Angelina Jolie on a "crazy" diet called liquid detox? [The Sun]
• WTF: Nadya Suleman has fired the nurse-nannies from Angels in Waiting! She felt she was being judged or something? How the heck is she going to take care of 14 kids by herself? Seriously? [E!]
• Did Jennifer Aniston dump John Mayer over his Twitter obsession? [Daily Mail]
• This one time, Mary-Kate Olsen was driven off the road by the paparazi. "It was never written about,"she says. [Just Jared]
• Designer Rachel Roy has filed for divorce from hip-hop mogul Damon Dash. He co-founded Rocawear but has since been struggling with debt and bad business deals; she has her own line of women's clothing. They have two kids. This should be interesting. [NY Daily News]
• Jesus Luz says he did not cheat on Madonna with some random woman in Brazil: "The press created this story." Welcome to fame! [The Sun]
• Uh-oh: "Madonna's fling with Jesus Luz and her rumored hookup with A-rod may foil adoption plans." An official from Malawi's Ministry of Child Welfare says: "Our official policy is that we do not encourage our children to be sent into broken homes." [NY Daily News]
• Um, this report claims that Jesus wants to adopt a kid with Madonna. Grain of salt. [ONTD]
• Angelina Jolie's mother owes $60,000 in back taxes, despite having passed away in 2007. How do you fix that? [TMZ]
• Diablo Cody and her homies all wear matching necklaces which read "Fuck My Face." Heart-warming! [NY Mag]
• Here is a photograph of Amy Winehouse climbing over a spiked fence and being compared to Sideshow Bob. [Daily Mail]
• Lindsay Lohan's former roommate and Tila Tequila's ex-girlfriend Courtenay Semel has checked into rehab. [Page Six]
• Someone blogging as Leighton Meester but decidedly not Leighton Meester likes poetry, goes to a shrink and complains about the paparazzi. [NY Observer]
• Nicole Richie channels Lady Gaga in her pix for BlackBook. [Just Jared]
• Cindy Crawford is naked in the April issue of Allure, with some strategically placed soap bubbles. [The Superficial]
• Jessica "Slimpson"'s body "has now fully returned to its former glory" so you can all relax. [The Sun]
• Geri Halliwell is on a "man-ban." [The Star]
• Another day, another story about Hugh Grant making out with two women at the same time. In public. [Page Six]
• Kim Kardashian couldn't pronounce "philanthropic" at a charity event, and people laughed at her. Tragic! [Gatecrasher]
• Is Fergie heading to Washington to play a private concert for Sasha and Malia Obama? Is this why she is brunette now? Will she teach them to spell duchess with a T? [Gatecrasher]
• Coldplay's Chris Martin met kiddie band The Wiggles, got super psyched and them covered their song, "Fruit Salad." So punk rock. [The Sun]
• Chris Martin can't get Michael Jackson tickets! [Mirror]
• Maybe Chris Martin should bid on this Michael Jackson stuff up for auction? A Swarovski crystal-encrusted white glove could go for a mere $15,000. [NY Daily News]
• Speaking of Michael Jackson, he's invited the stars of Harry Potter to be All-Access guests opening night of his sold-out UK shows. Naturally. [The Sun]
• Anne Hathaway will play Judy Garland in an upcoming film and theater productions of Get Happy: The Life Of Judy Garland. Question is: Will she sing or lip sync? [E!]
• People. For the last time. Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are not a couple in real life. Quit asking. Sheesh. [E!]
• But hey! Meet the New Moon wolf pack! Cute teenage Native American actors! [Socialite Life]
• Amanda Seyfried has pulled out of Zack Snyder's film Sucker Punch — described as Alice in Wonderland with machine guns — due to scheduling conflicts. Who should play Baby Doll, the girl in a mental institution in this big-budget action flick? [ONTD via Slashfilm via EW]
• "Syfy" is not a new kind of hip hop from the West coast but what the Sci-Fi Channel is calling itself now. It's also Polish slang for syphilis, so people aren't kidding when they say, "Sick name." [Jossip]
• Denise Richards went to see Charlie Sheen's new twins: "They're amazing." Isn't it nice when everyone gets along? [ET]
• Ooh, recession humor: Amanda Bynes has just signed to an ABC pilot called Canned, a show about a group of friends who are all fired on the same day. [ET]
• Kiefer Sutherland has signed on to play Jack Bauer for an eight season of 24. [Mirror]
• Anna Faris is on the new cover of Self magazine; cover also shills "1 minute abs." Huh? [Just Jared]
• Chelsea Handler's last night show has been extended through 2012. Bring back Russell Brand! [Reuters]
• Oh no: Problems with NBC's Parks & Recreation? Test audiences found it "unoriginal" and "too slow." [Deadline Hollywood]
• Kenny Rogers music helps stroke victims. [Wired]
• This article about Angela Lansbury contains the following sentence: "Ms. Lansbury, who describes herself as a homebody and a working actress, is described by pretty much everyone else as a 'living legend,' a phrase that makes her want to vomit 'a little,' she conceded." [WSJ]
• Blind item! "Which TV heartthrob had to wait until a young starlet's mom walked away before he could hit on her at a party?" [Gatecrasher]
• "This movie was never meant to be the end of Hannah Montana. The thing is, a lot of people put where the show's future lays in my hands — and it's not up to me. It's up to Disney and whether they want more episodes, and we hope that they do." — Miley Cyrus. [Yahoo via Billboard]
• "I had avoided getting married pretty good for, like, 23 years, and I ... secretly felt that men who were married admired me, like I was the last of the real gunslingers." — David Letterman. [People]

• 18-year-old Bristol Palin and her baby daddy, Levi Johnston, have sold pictures of their newborn baby boy Tripp to People for an estimated $300,000. That's a lot of moose burgers! [MSNBC]

• Of course, this is not as much as a Jolie-Pitt tot, but probably way more than than the average baby born to teen parents, and an Oxy-head grandma, in a small town in the great state of Alaska could ever earn. [MSNBC]
• Woody Harrelson wed his longtime girlfriend Laura Louie — mother to his three daughters — on Sunday, after two decades together, finally making it legal. He was too busy up until now trying to do the same for pot. [People]
• A Roc-A-Fella records documentary about the demise of former friends Jay-Z and Damon Dash's business partnership is in the works by former BET producer and Roc employee Choke No Joke. Apparently a lot of it had to do with Dash's signing of Ol' Dirty Bastard and his proposal of Cam'ron as a vice president of the label. According to Joke, "Jay wasn't feeling none of that [bleep]." [Page Six]
• Mia Farrow's first daughter, Lark Previn, whom she adopted from Vietnam with her then-husband, musician Andre Previn, died on Christmas Day. Lark was only 35, and although the cause of her illness was not released, she's said to have been sick for a decade. She had two daughters, who are 12 and 13. [NY Daily News]
• Eliza Dushku and Family Guy creator Seth McFarlane were an item but she dumped him for, get this, Brent Bolthouse, Heidi Montag's fake boss on The Hills. [Page Six]
• Michael Lohan has called a temporary truce between himself and his daughter's girlfriend Samantha Ronson, posting this on his blog, asking people not to post comments about it on other blogs: "I respectfully ask that all sources, so called friends and mouthpieces refrain from any more comments or suggestions on her blog." [Perez HIlton]
• Tom Brady may sit the 2009 season out, which means he'll get to spend more time with fiancé Giselle. [TMZ]
• Is singer Jason Mraz totally high in this interview? And if so, on what? [ONTD]
• Eurythmics star Dave Stewart has designed £1,000 vibrator "made of solid steel with a satin finish and a band of 28 diamonds—but bizarrely has a guitar pick attached and the lyrics from Stewart’s latest solo song, 'Let’s Do It Again,' scrawled on it." He obviously doesn't think the recession will affect the price of orgasms for his two or three fans who would even consider buying this. [The Sun]
• Brody Jenner's new show Bromance, about dudes who cry because they want to hang out with him, premiered last night. These are the first two guys to go home, which we're not sure makes them slightly better than the rest, or way lamer. [ONTD]
• Apparently Mariah Carey annoyed the scientific community because she didn't understand math well enough to name her album E=MC², which came out in April. The scientific community should be more annoyed that it took them over six months to realize that Mariah Carey wasn't a math whiz. [MSNBC]
• Nick Cannon was seen out, sans Mimi, drinking a virgin daiquiri instead of booze. Maybe he's not allowed to drink because she's not allowed to drink because maybe she's pregs? [E!]
• In more awesome pussy-drink news you can't use: Dane Cook and Wilmer Valderrama were drinking diet Gatorade together on Christmas Day. [E!]
• LudaCrismas is a real thing that involves rapper Ludacris, and not just what the holiday office party is called on 30 Rock. [E!]
• A sequel to American Pie that isn't straight to video and features the original cast? Yes, please! Anything for more Tara Reid and Natasha Lyonne red carpet moments! [Moviehole]
• Madonna pisses another $2.6 million on "charity" aka Kabbalah. [Fox News]
• USA Today has released it's 2008 Celebrity Heat Index. Britney Spears is number one and her sister Jamie Lynn joins her in the top 10. [USA Today]
• Oh boy. Brit wants to go to Iraq to entertain the troops. Too bad this probably means she wants to sing and not talk about time travel. [Showbiz Spy]
• Johnny Depp to guest star on Little Britain USA? Computer says yes. [The Sun]
• Donald Trump is all pissed off that CNBC's Rebecca Jarvis' on-air promo bio for the network doesn't mention the fact that she was a fourth season contestant on The Apprentice. He actually wrote to her about it, he was worked up over it. [Page Six]
• Barbra Streisand said that she loves couches now because she didn't have one growing up, since her family didn't have a living room, and there were like six people living in a two bedroom apartment. Somethings never change in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. [People]
• Prince's sister Tyka Nelson has released a gospel album. The press release for it billed her as "only full-sister of 'Rock Legend' Prince." [Star Tribune]
• “Look seans an old friend of mine and i didnt buy his performance at all—thought he did an average pretend acting like he was gay besides hes one of the most homophobic people i kno [sic]" - Wrestler star Mickey Rourke being a bitch about Oscar nominations and trashing "old friend" Sean Penn in an intercepted text message. [The Daily Beast]
• "I’d like to put my tongue through her hair and lick every part of her head for the rest of her life. It would probably be appalling to her, but not to me." - Somewhat self-aware David Gest, talking about Texas singer Sharleen Spiteri, whom he's never met (lucky for her and her hair). [The Sun]
• "I’m wearing a fat suit! It’s suffocating. Unfortunately, we live our life in public, so any weight gain or pimple is a national story. I don’t get this obsessions with weight. It’s not only Hollywood; it’s our society.” - Eva Longoria [Parker? Is she still adding that?] in her interview for February's Glamour, for which she graces the cover. (More pics here.) [Just Jared]
• "I never expected that kind of thing, to be honest. I think that comes with my age, the whole sex-symbol thing. I'll grow out of that. It's a phase. And people want to turn you into merchandise in some way, don't they?" - Scarlett Johansson wants to be taken seriously as an actress, dammit! [Showbiz Spy]

• Britney Spears's comeback includes a stop at NBC’s Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree Lighting Ceremony on December 3. Will she perform? Will she push the button and light the tree? Will she ice skate? So many questions. [MSNBC]
• Wait a minute: In this report, Britney says her new life sucks! "There’s no excitement, there’s no passion. I have really good days, and then I have bad days. Even when you go to jail you know there’s the time when you’re gonna get out. But in this situation, it’s never ending. It’s just like Groundhog Day every day. […] I think it’s too in control. If I wasn’t under the restraints I’m under, I’d feel so liberated. When I tell them the way I feel, it’s like they hear but they’re really not listening." B-but- you're doing so well! [The Sun]
• Brit's new CD leaked all over the internet yesterday, probably deliberately. Fans dig it. [The Sun]
• Barack Obama's barber in Chicago says the President-Elect doesn't mind having gray hair. "It's not like he has a head full of gray hair," says Zariff, who only goes by one name. "It's just a few gray hairs, so it's nothing to get excited about." Oh! And Zariff might visit DC! "I said, 'I'm going with you' [if you win]," Zariff told Obama. His reply? "Absolutely. I'm not changing barbers, man." [Us]
• Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer had a romantic candlelight dinner. It's so on. [People]

• Have you seen Rihanna's new video, the one with Justin Timberlake? She slithers on the hood of a car, he's dripping wet in a wife beater. They embrace. It's HOT. [Concrete Loop]
• Jessica Simpson says her sister Ashlee may induce labor. What is she doing?
  "Different foot massages and stuff," Jessica told Ellen DeGeneres on her show (which airs Wednesday). "I don't know. I think she's really just jumping around trying everything right now." [People]
• Angelina Jolie was on BBC radio last night, talking about Changeling. There's video, so if you want to see her ignoring the camera, being incredibly reserved and looking down and being quiet, by all means, watch. [Perez Hilton]
• Angelina got super emotional while talking about her mom at a press conference in London. Tears! [Perez Hilton]
• When asked if the public could expect her to add to her enormous family with Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie replied: "Sure you can." [Mirror]
• By the by, Angelina's dad Jon Voight says he has one wish before he dies and it's "to work with my son [James Haven] and Angie again, in a movie. The three of us together. That would be nice." [MSNBC]
• Get psyched: Miley Cyrus will perform on the finale of Dancing With The Stars, just two days after her 16th birthday. Her song is called "Fly On The Wall," maybe you want to get the lyrics and sing along? [People, UPI]
• Jennifer Lopez loves motherhood and wants more babies. Cashmere onesies for everyone! [MSNBC]
• Tim Robbins has written an open letter to Gregory C. Soumas of the New York City Board of Elections. It begins: "I would like to publicly apologize for being such a dim-witted dilettante on Election Day. I was under the naïve assumption that I could vote where I voted in the last two elections." And it ends: "I was thinking of returning that favor by publishing your home address in this letter but then I thought that maybe one of the thousands of New Yorkers that were taken off the voter rolls in the last two months might not understand what a patriotic upstanding man you are and might show up at your doorstep with the misguided assumption that you are a petty vindictive corrupt scumbag." [Huffington Post]
• Christian Siriano: Engaged! He also might appear on Gossip Girl and says his next collection is "a little bit inspired by Egypt." Oh, and he saw the Victoria's Secret fashion show and declares: "Tranny Klum is fabulous." That's Heidi to you and me. [E!]
• William from Stylista has written a goodbye letter, in which he says: "I want Ashlie to win! Hands down! Team Ashlie all the way! She is, quite possibly, the only sane person (minus the hysterics) left on the show. Now, that's not to say that I don't like a little crazy, but honestly, I could sing Ashlie's praises all day." [Elle]
• Authorities found "multiple prescription bottles" by the body of Paula Goodspeed after she allegedly overdosed near Paula Abdul's house last week. [TMZ]
• An extra in a courtroom scene on NBC's Medium was so disruptive, he was kicked out of the jury box. Turns out he was Sasha Baron Cohen, dressed as Bruno. Guess Patricia Aquette didn't see that one coming. [EW]
• Lipstick Jungle: Not canceled. Yet. [NY Mag, NY Times]
• Jennifer Love Hewitt's trailer on the set of Ghost Whisperer was burgled. [TMZ]
• Michael Jackson will not go to London, despite being sued by former pal Prince Abdullah of Bahrain. The cash was an advance, in exchange for two albums, a musical, and an autobiography. None of which Jackson has delivered. The trial started yesterday and continues today, without Jackson's presence; his lawyer says he is to ill to travel. [Fox 411]
• Courtney Love went on some kind of blogathon on Sunday, posting 60 times. Now she writes: "I didnt know that style.com would put all those links together, i dont ingest alchohol and to even make the merest suggestion of a Cr__k P–e is insane and mean.and a lie, wichyou know perfectly well." She also says: "i am not suicidal, occasionally very occasioanly like all of us i get depressed, and that was over a year ago and i had a mini little depression attack well big one, and the Lanvin show made me happier, i dont know quite why it happened but i find that mediciation is not the answer to this, working out and doing daimoku ( chanting) is as is yoga and eating correctly and i want somemore Kombucha tea i think that stuff is miraculous for glow and health. those things work far better than this chemical culture of numbing our rage and numbing our pains and demons." There's a [sic] on all of that, obvs. [Perez Hilton]
• Simon Cowell and Terri Seymour wer on Extra. They were asked why they broke up. Simon said: "Because Terri decided to dump me. You sent me a text." Terri replied: "I didn't dump you. It was just time. We had a great six years, and we're the best of friends." Simon denied that Terri got a £5 million "golden goodbye." He laughed: "If anything I should be getting the money." [Daily Mail]
• Russell Brand's girlfriend, Sydney Jo Jackson, is cute and curly-haired, but this paper says she is "equally barmy in the barnet department." [The Sun]
• Lenny Kravitz is having trouble selling is sexy penthouse, a "moody orgy palace" priced at $18 million. It's been on the market for six years; dreadlocked rockstar not included. [NY Mag via Curbed]
• What's in Julianne Moore's makeup bag? Kiehl's Original Musk, Tarte Cheek Stain in Blushing Bride, Olay Complete Defense Daily UV Moisturizer. And more. [Marie Claire]
• Jessica Lange has a book of photography and it is gorgeous. Click to see some black and white shots. [NY Mag]
• Brandon Walters, a 6 year old aboriginal boy who stars with Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman in Australia, is suddenly famous, but Nicole says: "I feel very protective of him. If the film does really well he is going to need a lot of protection." His mom says: "If it does become a problem for him we'll just go out bush, get away from it all. Now he's at school, he's happy and never stops talking. The film made him confident. He's no longer shy." [Reuters]
• Seth Rogan wants to make a porno-based comedy for Showtime. It would be a series about three twentysomethings who learn about life and love while running a pornography shop, and it's in development. [Variety]
• Rashida Jones: Back on NBC! She'll star in Amy Poehler's new show. [Page Six]
• Beef between Damon Dash and Jay-Z: Kanye West is involved, as are diamond chains. [Rush & Molloy]
• Speaking of Kanye, 50 Cent says Mr. West's new album is "interesting" and that the public "won't forgive him for it" and that it's actually "T-Pain's album." Ouch. [The.Life Files]
• Celine Dion has been forced to postpone several tour dates due to a respiratory virus. Her people say: "Her physician has instructed her to refrain from singing in order to completely recover." [Perez Hilton]
• Heather Locklear: Formally charged with DUI after that incident when she was arrested in September. She's been charged with one count of driving under the influence of prescription drugs. [Extra, TMZ]
• Actress Heather Matarazzo was supposed to marry girlfriend Caroline Murphy in California, but now that Prop 8 has passed, she jokes, "We're breaking up. I'm going to get together with [MSNBC's] Keith Olbermann. We'll have babies, lots of babies!" [Rush & Molloy]
• Spotted: Natalie Imbruglia snogging Will.i.am from the Black Eyed Peas. [Mirror]
• Meg Ryan has won a German lifetime achievement award for best international actress and will pick up the statuette at a gala ceremony November 27. They're calling her the "queen of romantic comedy" and seem to think it is still 1989. [Yahoo News]
• Stan Lee and Olivia de Havilland both received the National Medal of Arts and the National Humanities Medal at the White House yesterday. [Washington Post]
• The Daily Mail apologizes for its "inaccurate" article about David Duchovny and his tennis coach. [People]
• "So how did Steve Martin and Maureen McCormick end up on a date? Florence Henderson knew Chevy Chase, who knew Steve Martin, who wanted Maureen's phone number. They had dinner and made out and the kissing was good, but Maureen was out of it. It would be their only date." [Huffington Post]
• This story, called "Producers' fury at George Takei for boldly going where he shouldn't have" is about how Takei urinated in the camp in the middle of the night on I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here. Producers are pissed! [Daily Mail]
• So far, George Takei is the favorite to win the show! [Mirror]
• Katie "Jordan" Price and husband Peter Andre are not on the rocks; here is a picture of her wearing a giant "P" necklace to prove it. [The Sun]
• Mindy McCready, who was released from jail two weeks ago, says she isn't proud of an affair she had with baseball great Roger Clemens. She met Clemens when she was 16 but didn't have sex with him until several years later. "Roger Clemens is one of the most wonderful men I've ever known. He treated me like a princess." But! She says she now has "nothing but remorse and nothing but sympathy for what [his wife Debbie] had to go through with this situation, and she has my utmost apology." [UPI]
• Coming to Broadway: Priscilla Queen of the Desert, the musical! [UPI]
• Mary Delgado , a former NFL cheerleader and winner of The Bachelor in 2004, is out of jail after being arrested in a southwest border-town bar for unruly behavior. Drama! [AP]
• Cheech and Chong: Gonna get roasted. Not baked, roasted! [UPI]
• A poem handwritten by Sir Paul McCartney for his friend Spike Milligan is to be sold at auction next week. It's called "The Poet Of Dumbswoman Lane." [Telegraph]
• Five year old Beatrice McCartney is on her dad's new track, a Sir Paul ditty called "Two Magpies." [Mirror]
• Bogota, Colombia hearts Duran Duran. [Guardian]
• "'Climb every Mountain' is a beautiful statement of philosophy. Critics may think The Sound of Music is saccharine, but I think it's profound." — Jon Voight. [MSNBC]
• "I've gotten more stylish since I've been with my husband. I was always making fun of him because he has so many leather coats, jackets and shoes. But he looks hot. I want to look good for him. So I kind of stepped it up a bit." — Heidi Klum in In Style. [People]
• "There's no smoking. The lights never go out, 24/7. You can't cover anything. You can't even put your head under a blanket. All the cells have cameras in them. I was told, you know, 'You'll have your own cell.' But I didn't for the first two or three weeks; I had a cell mate. He got out – but not for long. He came back in pretty quick." — Keifer Sutherland on his stint in jail, in Men's Vogue. [People]
• "Pete and I laugh about it. We can’t win. If we’re smiling for the cameras they say we’re setting it up to gloss over the cracks. If we’re not together they think we’ve split up." — Katie "Jordan" Price on the breakup rumors about her and husband Peter Andre. [Daily Mail]
• "Yes, I have solar panels and all that sort of stuff. However, the more I learn about the subject matter, I also realise that people find it patronizing. They feel like they're being told what to do when somebody like me talks about the fact I have solar panels. Not everybody can get solar panels and not everyone can drive a hybrid car. It's not about blame or telling people how to live, it's just about saying, 'Let's all be aware of these issues.'" — Leonardo DiCaprio. [Daily Express]
• "In terms of my future as an actor and stuff, I don't know. I am in a place in my life where... I've had some great opportunities and I may just choose to have some more children. I've no idea what is in my future but I am very at peace with where I want to be. There are many things I want to do besides act." — Nicole Kidman. [Reuters]
• "Sometimes I lie in bed and I'm like, 'Oh my god, there's Seal lying next to me. What's he doing there?' I get a smile on my face immediately. Our honeymoon period is definitely not over." — Heidi Klum in In Style. [People]
• "We feed the chickens and the pigs — I have two pigs, and boy are they really pigs. They just get down in that mud and roll around. I like getting down in there and working in the garden. Oh, I want someone to build me a good chicken coop… like a man who can just get down there and build it…ooh." — Reese Witherspoon, on taking her kids to her farm outside of L.A. [USA Today]

• A Britney Spears/Justin Timberlake duet! In the works! [Page Six]
• Jennifer Garner has confirmed that she is expecting her second child. But you knew that. "It always makes me laugh when people say 'Is she?' 'Isn't she?' It's like eventually you will know, so just chill out for a minute," she says. [People]
• Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt plan on hosting a soirée — as suggested by the mayor (?!?!) in their town in Southern France. They want to get to know the locals and be good neighbors and all that. [Daily Express]
• Matt Damon and his wife welcomed their second daughter into the world on Wednesday. Her name is Gia Zavala Damon. [Reuters]
• Details on Madonna's Sticky & Sweet tour: 100 pairs of out of stock fishnet, pantyhose in old style weave, purchased for Madonna via ebay and local dance shops; 12 traveling trampolines, 3 Romanian gypsy musicians, 1 chiropractor, 1 personal trainer, 1 masseuse. Four sections of the "journey": Pimp, old school, gypsy and rave. [Perez Hilton]
• Hot new L.A. property: Paparazzi-proof condo. [U.S. News & World Report]
• Nasty blind item! "Which two perky Olympian teammates are really bitter rivals? One spiked the other's protein shake with laxatives before a big competition, but her plan backfired when her nemesis not only powered through the competition but beat her so-called friend anyway." [Rush & Molloy]

• Three adult patients died unexpectedly and a teenage patient was raped at Aurora Las Encinas Hospital, the Pasadena psychiatric facility known for its association with celebrity physician Dr. Drew Pinsky. [L.A. Times]
• Is Jodie Foster making nice with her ex-partner, Cydney Bernard, so she doesn't have to pay her $25 million in alimony? [Perez Hilton]
• Lindsay Lohan's bralessness makes headlines. [The Sun]
• Sam and Lindsay "fled the scene" of Sam's birthday party Tuesday night, because there were too many photographers. [Page Six]
• Courtenay Semel, Lindsay's alleged "first girlfriend" wound up in jail in Vegas Tuesday night after a drunken altercation with security. She's dating Tila Tequila now, btw. [Page Six]
• Catherine Zeta-Jones attended the funeral of her grandmother, Zeta, today in Swansea, UK. [The Sun]
• 90210 promo: Shannen Doherty asks, "Miss me?" [ET]
• Tori Spelling on 90201: "As of now there are no plans for me to be on the show. I hope it turns out to be a really great show, just for my dad’s legacy." [People]
• Blake Lively responds to that video clip of America Ferrera rolling her eyes! Blake says: "I haven't even heard about it. I don't ever pay attention to that stuff. She's one of my best friends in the whole world and honestly, when you're sitting in a room for three hours doing satellite interviews — we were staring at a Post-It with a smiley face — so I think I probably rolled my eyes a hundred times." [EW]
• Uh-oh, music mogul Damon Dash owes $7.3 million in mortgage payments on two Manhattan apartments. Foreclosure proceedings have begun! Where is (former Roc-A-Fella Records partner) Jay-Z when you need him? [Rolling Stone]
• Someone's suing Salma and Sami Hayek. Investment deal gone bad. [TMZ]
• Peaches and Bob Geldof have smoothed things over by going for tapas in Majorca. Crimminy. I wish I were in Majorca right now. [The Sun]
• Rhys Ifans started a drunken brawl at gf Kimberley Stewart's birthday party. Apparently some dude tried to chat up Kim, and Rhys screamed: "Fuck off, don't touch my bird! Let's take this outside, you think you're a big man." Haha, wow. [Mirror]
• James McAvoy has landed the lead role in Gnomeo And Juliet, in which he is a garden gnome who falls in love with an ornament. [Mirror]
• Cher helped Bill Clinton celebrate his birthday Monday in Vegas. Do you believe in life after love? [Page Six]
• Is Oprah sick of being on the cover of O magazine? [Page Six]
• An animated Amy Winehouse stars in a new online game called "Escape From Rehab." The goal: To get out of a clinic and rescue Blake Incarcerated from jail. Your weapons: A beehive, a crack pipe and a syringe. Sigh. [The Sun]
• Jason Wahler's upcoming civil trial could dig up some dirt, like his battles with alcohol and substance abuse, his previous arrests and the time he called the plaintiff, a tow-truck driver, the N-word. [E!]
• Angie Harmon and Jason Sehorn: Expecting baby number 3. [AP]
• Jerry Seinfeld will be the new celebrity pitchman for Microsoft and appear in ads with Bill Gates. Will the campaign be better than the Apple commercials with Justin "I'm a Mac" Long? Uh, if by better you mean nerdier, then, yes. [WSJ]
• James Brown's children, the woman who says she's his last wife, and the state of South Carolina are nearing a settlement over the late soul singer's estate. There should be an inheritance for 6-year-old James Brown II, who had to take a DNA test in April. Hopefully, he feels good. [USA Today]
• Gary Glitter returned to Thailand after being refused entry to Hong Kong. He's in some kind of international limbo. [Guardian]
• Coming to theaters August 29: Mamma Mia!: The Sing-Along Edition, with lyric subtitles. Plug your ears or join in! [MSNBC]
• "Mr. President, are you aware/Our flesh and blood is dying over there?/When the coffins come back, do you care?/When only the poor kids die, is it fair?/Don't get me wrong. I respect the flag/But it hurts to see a kid in a body bag/He fought for his country with all he had/Now we have a family without a dad." — LL Cool J's new track, "Mr. President." [Rush & Molloy]
• "I wish I had been nude from the time I was 12 until I was 28. I looked great! I want to tell all young girls to walk around in bikinis all summer — and enjoy it. I want to tell them to never, ever feel bad about anything, because there will be that one day in your 20s when you’ll eat a hamburger and actually see the hamburger on the side of your leg." —Jennifer Love Hewitt. [MSNBC]
• "I love horses. I've learned from them. Once you master a horse — but it also masters you — you gain more confidence in yourself. [Riding horses] has a rhythm that's rather Zen-like. When you can mount it and move it and move along with it, that is a hard-won and very real accomplishment." —Christian Bale. [Yahoo News]
• "I won’t say I’m never going to do drugs again. I just know I’m not a good person on drugs." — Lily Allen. [The Sun]
• "The majority of times I go to the cinema, I want a bit of everything. I want to be challenged intellectually, and then again I don't want to be too challenged intellectually. I believe my wife to be very creative so of course I'm interested in how she thinks, and there seems to be no end to the desire to be creative; I find that invigorating and interesting. You know, you have conversations, some deep, some shallow. That's the same in everybody's relationship." —Guy Ritchie. [Telegraph]
• "I don't think running for office is anything I'm prepared for or could even prepare myself for. I work really long hours and work a lot and have done press tours and junkets, but there is nothing like a presidential campaign that I have experienced before... I think at one point we visited three different cities in one state in 12 hours. It's exhausting." — America Ferrera on campaigning for Hillary Clinton with Chelsea Clinton. [E!]

• Jennifer Lopez finally gave birth to her twins: She and Marc Anthony are the proud parents of a boy and a girl. The names have not yet been announced, but we're hoping they don't pick Jenny Jr. and Marc Jr. How about something like Luz and Libertad? [People]
  
• The 5-pound, 7-ounce girl arrived first, followed by her 6-pound brother minutes later. Jennifer and Marc are "thrilled and over the moon." [CNN]
  
• Amy Winehouse "trashed" her hotel room before the Brit Awards: Booze was spilled, cigarette butts were scattered, bottles of champagne and "unwashed knickers" were all over the floor. She also blackened the tub by using it to dye her hive. And there was a large mirror taken off the wall and lying on the floor. She's only a half-naked groupie shy of the full rock cliché box set! [The Sun]
  
• The restraining order finally served to Sam Lutfi means he must not contact Britney — including via telephone — through March 17. Progress! [TMZ]
  
• A bartender at NYC hotspot Socialista has hepatitis A, so Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore, Madonna, Lucy Liu, Salma Hayek, Kate Hudson and Bruce Willis had better get shots! [Page Six]
  
• Hip-hop mogul Damon Dash during the lunar eclipse: "I'm a little scared." LOL. [Page Six]

• Dating Natalie Portman a while back made Moby "a target of a lot of nerd wrath." Poor baby! [Page Six]
• Prince is throwing a post-Oscars bash! Expected guests include Katie and Tom, Will Smith, Salma and Penelope. [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which member of the Black Enterprise 'Top 25 Hollywood Money Makers,' whose sexuality long has been in question by fans, was seen trying not to be seen with a same sex pal at an L.A. restaurant Wednesday evening? "They were trying not to look like they were together, but they looked together," says a witness." [Gatecrasher]
• Aaron Carter, 20, was pulled over for speeding in Texas and cops found two ounces of marijuana in his car, uh-oh. Not found: His career. [TMZ]
• Heather Mills is on FHM's list of the world's most sexiest women. She's 95th, but that's ahead of Gwen Stefani, Paris Hilton and Kirsten Dunst. [Mirror]
• Does Lindsay Lohan have a new man? Does she love anyone as much as she loves leggings? [The Sun]
• Beyoncé is going to play legendary singer Etta James in an upcoming film; Ms. James says, "It's a privilege and an honor to have somebody like that girl. I don't think she looks like me, but that's all right. I wasn't as bourgie as she is, she's bourgeois. She knows how to be a lady, she's like a model. I wasn't like that... I smoked in the bathroom in school, I was kinda arrogant, so those are some of the things I would want to tell her." [Concrete Loop]
• Angelina and Brad are cohosts of an Oscar party on Saturday — and so is Jennifer Aniston. The bash is being held by the pool of the Beverly Hills Hotel, we can only dream of a scenario in which the ladies wrestle and fall into the water, then Brad has to strip down and break them apart. What? It could happen. [MSNBC]
• An entertainment news agency has apologized to Will Smith for distributing a story alleging he called Adolf Hitler a "good person." [Guardian]
• A portrait of Heath Ledger is up for a prominent art prize in Australia. The portrait was painted by Heath's friend Vincent Fantauzzo, who says, "When you paint someone, you meditate over them. I was painting Heath every day for 10 hours a day." [People]
• Harrison Ford blames his decision to sport an earring on Jimmy Buffet and Ed Bradley. [UPI]
• Valerie Bertinelli says she and Eddie Van Halen cheated on each other, if you care. [People]
• Delta Burke, who checked into a psychiatric hospital in January, says she suffered from anxiety as early as kindergarten. Also: Her hoarding is a problem! "At one time I had 27 storage units. I don't have a big enough house!" she claims. "My mom had it, it's my mother's fault. She saved the diaper I came home from the hospital in!" [USA Today]
• OMG Tori Spelling's autobiography is gonna be awesome! On Shannen Doherty: "Shannen had everything, but she could be arrogant and carefree. Jennie [Garth] was outspoken when she thought Shannen was out of line. Sometimes they got along, but there were explosions. Once they got into a fistfight. A night with [Shannen] meant going to the hottest club and drinking until the early hours. I knew she was a 'bad influence,' but I liked her anyway." [Perez Hilton]

• Britney Spears found out that her 16-year-old sister Jamie Lynn was pregnant when everybody else did... Last night as the new issue of OK! was dropping. She was said to be "frantic" when she heard. [TMZ]
  
• Then Brit told a group of photographers and fans, "My sister's not pregnant." [TMZ]
  
• Then she issued a statement: "Britney is aware of the news regarding Jamie Lynn's pregnancy. She wishes her sister nothing but the best and asks for privacy during this time." She can ask, but she's not gonna get it. [Perez Hilton]
  
• Oh, and Lynne Spears' book on parenting is being delayed. Good idea! [People]

• But anyway, a source says "Jamie Lynn was the family's big hope. With Britney, one minute you're in, the next you're out. Brit had been supporting her family for years, and now all eyes were on Jamie Lynn." No pressure! Also, JL met her babydaddy in church. They must have been so into each other that they skipped some important sermons. [MSNBC]
• Lily Allen is also preggers! The 22-year-old found out she was expecting last month, but just told her family. The dad is 37-year-old boyfriend Ed Simons from the Chemical Brothers. Sources say Lily is "thrilled." [The Sun]
• But yeah, Lily will have to quit smoking. [Daily Mail]
• Is American Idol alum and Color Purple star Fantasia Barrino also knocked up? Is unprotected sex the new hot trend? Doesn't anyone use condoms anymore? Sigh. [Page Six]
• Did Lindsay Lohan say to "roommate" Courtenay Semel "lezzbe friends, breast friends"? They were seen holding hands at the party of a power lesbian. But maybe Courtenay was just holding LL back from non-sober fun? [Page Six]
• Lindsay's dad Michael played the role of Joseph in a Nativity scene in Times Square. Not a joke. [Page Six]
• A woman in Atlanta claims she became bipolar after Damon Dash exposed himself to her. Genitalia trauma! [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which diva songstress, as much a legend for her attitude as her pipes, demanded that an L.A. hair salon close for her on a busy Saturday, only to cancel the appointment?" [Gatecrasher]
• Helena Bonham Carter's "push present" from Tim Burton? Four pairs of lace-up biker boots. The gift that says, "Darling, you kick ass." [Daily Express]
• Kate Moss is taking her man, Jamie "Hotel Hince, her daughter, her mother and her stepfather on a sunny £30,000 vacation — maybe to St. Bart's. We wanna go too! [Daily Mail]
• Prince William took girlfriend Kate Middleton on a pheasant shoot. She carried dead birds and her man kissed her for being a good sport. Romantic! [Daily Mail]
• Ooh, are the Prince and Kate secretly living together? [Daily Express]
• Psychiatrists were called to calm a "screaming and sobbing" Amy Winehouse before her arrest yesterday. She was questioned for over two hours and then released on bail. Hey, at least she's not with child. Yet. [Daily Mail]
• Princess Diana had a half-empty package of contraceptives among her belongings before she died, her inquest has revealed. This makes it less likely that she was pregnant at the time of the crash. [Mirror]
• Tom Cruise's film Valkyrie is being delayed until next fall, because a pivotal scene has not been shot. Or because the buzz is that it sucks. [MSNBC]
• Chris O'Donnell and his wife Caroline gave birth to their fifth child. Soon they'll have enough for a dodgeball team! [People]

• Marc Jacobs wants a reality show, and Project Runway's Tim Gunn wants it for him. "The whole thing's sort of egotistical, I suppose, but I do find myself entertaining," says Jacobs. And says Gunn, "God knows Marc has a fascinating life, and he looks great. I'd watch." Well, if it has Tim's vote... [NY Mag]
  
• Marc Jacobs' kidswear line Little Marc is opening up a little store. [WWD, 5th item]
  
• Sex and the City wardrobe spoiler. Says Patricia Field: "Without giving too much away, there is a shoe from Dior that Carrie wears all the time that I am sure will be on fire... My intention in the movie was to approach it realizing that four or five years have passed... there are little twists on Carrie that will be an opposite approach from the image we have of her, like a heavier shoe or studs." [WWD, 2nd item]

• Jason Schwartzman is the new face of indie fashion label Band of Outsiders. Is that name sort of self-awareness wrapped in irony wrapped in self-awareness wrapped in sincerity? Or is Jason Schwartzman just a bad fit? [WWD, 2nd item]
• Fila has launched a contest on its website, asking brand-devotees to submit photos of themselves that answer the question "How do you Fila?" Not that it's an invitation for teenage boys to submit photos of themselves "fila"-ing up girls who are "fila"-ing horny or anything. [MediaPost]
• Kohl's, meanwhile, answers this question and says, "With us!" A new Fila for Kohl's line will be in stores next fall. [WSJ]
• Giorgio Armani visited Australia this weekend so he could, um, bond with the beneficiaries of the "biggest single financial donation to an Australian theatrical institution," his declaration of "patronage" to the Sydney Theatre Company, helmed by Cate Blanchett. [WWD, sub req'd]
• And in other self-congratulatory Armani-speak, Giorgio also says, "Cary Grant is still the man. He managed to look good in a suit even while running across a field being chased by a plane. My friend George Clooney has that quality too - he looks effortlessly smart whatever he is wearing. I'm flattered that he chooses to wear my designs." [Vogue UK]
• Valentino: Also humble! "People say, 'Oh, Mr. Valentino, fashion without you is very sad.'" [Fashion Week Daily]
• Damon Dash-better half Rachel Roy just got an undisclosed amount of funding from TSM, a firm that also just purchased 22% of English label Matthew Williamson. Not sure why she needs the money, but, ha ha, just kidding. [Vogue UK]
• Bebe: No longer designing with fur! PETA likes this! Bebe: Still selling fur! PETA does not like this. [PETA]

• Ooh, awkward! Alice+Olivia designer Stacey Bendet flew Molly Sims out to walk in her show today. Simms told New York magazine that the models at Alice+Olivia are underfed, in response to the magazine's statement that high-end shows have well-fed girls and low-end shows do not. Stacey Bendet = Pissed. Molly Sims = Stupid. [NY Post]
  
• Do not fuck with Anna Sui. In the goody bags at her show yesterday, attendees were gifted with t-shirts which read: "Forever Wanted: Don Cassidy & The Sundance Jin, Reward $21,000. Thou shalt not steal; Exodus 20:15," a reference to Sui's current lawsuit against Forever 21 owners Don and Jin Chang and their hardcore Christianity. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Now Reese Witherspoon thinks she's a fashion designer too. The maybe-girlfriend of Jake Gyllenhaal is claiming to have played an integral part in designing Olivier Theyskens most recent collection for Nina Ricci. Delusional much? [Sassybella]

• Burberry and Iconix: No longer fighting about prints in raincoats and copyright infringement. Us: No longer carrying about prints in raincoats and copyright infringement. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Damon Dash might have sold his stake in Rocawear, but now he's establishing a partnership with Keds. Which is much, much cooler than seeing Mischa Barton's alien face hovering above a pair of slip-ons. [WWD, 2nd item]
• A hearty welcome to Sarah Cristobel, who joins Harper's Bazaar online as their Senior Web Editor after having been Associate Editor at Style.com. We congratulate her on defecting from the tribe of Naste, and ask her to please brace herself for our wicked ways. [WWD, last item]
• Elizabeth Smith is the new president of Avon, having formally been the head global marketing officer. We'll take some of that Super Shape Anti-Cellulite & Stretch Mark Creme, thanks! [WSJ]
• Maggie Rizer threatens to destroy our street cred, and pride, with her blogging gig for ELLE.com, saying of her new gig, "Nothing about it is really hard. You just have to force yourself to sit down and type." This is the sound of our hearts breaking. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Paging Oedipus? When asked for a comment about his father Ralph Lauren's 40th anniversary, David Lauren said, "Those shoes are too tough to fill!" Well, that is unless you kill your father and have sex with your mother. Just sayin'... [Fashion Week Daily]

• Larry King won the "prize" that is an interview with the dumbest person alive. [LA Times]
  
• Prince William is trying to win back his beloved Kate Middleton. [People]
  
• George Clooney "won't even look at a picture of a goat again" after getting the runs while touring Africa. [The Sun]
  
• Cameron Diaz got in a lot of trouble for carrying a Mao Zedong bag to Peru, where the Maoist guerilla movement Shining Path did not make a lot of friends in the 1980s. What no one points out is that Mao did a leeetle bit more damage to the country where Cameron bought the thing to begin with. [USA Today]
  
• Now that she's put her MySpace blog to bed, singer Lily Allen is using Page Six to babble about antagonizing socialite Tinsley Mortimer in the Hamptons and racking up a $10,000 a month hotel bill. [Page Six]

• Paula Abdul's birthday party was sponsored by a brand of alcoholic water Smirnoff clearly invented just for her. [Rush & Molloy]
• Record exec/designer Damon Dash is a drunk, which may be why his designer wife Rachel Roy cheats on him. [Page Six]
• Celebrity stylist Jessica Paster held an open cattle-call for assistants during which her little dog peed all over the clothes and she offered prospects Lean Cuisine and Red Bull to drink. [Page Six]
• Cute nerd Gideon Yago gave $1,450 to Wesley Clark's campaign last election while covering it for MTV News and isn't apologizing for it. "I don't understand. Things that I do as a private citizen? I mean, what the [blank], man?" [Washington Post]