Anna's husband left her three years ago with her higher salary and their 5-year-old daughter because, she thinks, she made more money than him. Two subsequent dates with whiners that complained about her not being "feminine" enough and too "in-control," she found herself crying at the dinner table and decided she needed to be a different kind of woman. Did she get actual post-divorce therapy? It doesn't sound like it, because if her accounting of the end of her marriage is true, she keeps dating the same exact asshole. Her ex-husband was intimidated by not being a high earner, so she's going out with a series of men who are intimidated that she's not a 25-year-old opinionless bimbo with no self-control. Does she stop to consider that the problem might not be that she's not feminine enough (or that it won't be solved by putting on a little make-up), but that the problem is with the men she's with and their outdated ideas of what is attractive in a woman?

My dad and I had a little conversation this weekend — he is, after all, married to my mom with whom I have a lot in common. He'd read a little drunkenly miserable blog post of mine in which I'd worried that being single at 30 was reflective of some fundamental problem with me and not the various issues of the idiots I spent my twenties dating. My dad told me (as dads are wont to do) that my single status doesn't mean that there's a goddamn thing wrong with me — and that my exes obviously all had problems in their own ways. He added that if there's anything wrong with me, it's that I keep choosing to get into relationships with idiots who can't deal with me being strong and independent, and that it's far better to end up strong and independent and still myself than to try to hide me under a bunch of frou-frou pink girly bullshit to get a man to stick around for a while and find out in 10 years that I lost myself and couldn't hold onto him either.

Anna, my dad is available for sympathetic, platonic drinks whenever you want. But, for free, he suggests you take a second look at that male friend who liked you when you were make-up-less, Botox-free and stressed out.

Fast Track To Femininity: Why Competing With Men Has Left Women Out Of Touch With Their Feminine Side [Daily Mail]

Dorries' calls America "The Abortion Capital of the World" because the rate of abortion per 1,000 women is 19.4 to Britain's 18.3 (Australia's is the highest in the world, at 20.0). The Daily Mail has a chart comparing abortion laws in 9 different countries; in it, the newspaper lists the "Upper Limit" of legally-acceptable abortions in the U.S. to be 26 weeks. But the reality is that getting an abortion after 12 weeks in many states is outright impossible.

According to NARAL, the pro-choice organization, "23 states have unconstitutional and unenforceable bans that could outlaw abortion as early as the 12th week of pregnancy, with no exception to protect a woman's health." In addition, "15 states have unconstitutional and unenforceable near-total criminal bans on abortion." Zoe Williams points out that "If you really wanted more abortions to take place earlier in the pregnancy, then you would work towards improving access to terminations on the NHS." Similarly, if Americans really wanted fewer late term abortions, they would provide better sex education in public schools and easy and cheap access to birth control. As we said earlier, 87% of counties don't even have access to an abortion provider. And anyway, Dorries is just picking on America because we're so loud and crass and angsty over the abortion issue. If she were really being accurate, she'd go after those abortion-happy Aussies, who "kill babies" even more than we do.

Britain Is 'Becoming The Abortion Capital Of The World' Claims Tory MP Fighting To Lower Legal Limit [Daily Mail]
Fact, Fiction And Foetuses [Guardian]
Abortion Bans After 12 Weeks [NARAL]
We Had Our Babies Under The 24-week Abortion Limit - And They All Survived [Daily Mail]

Earlier: Pro-Life Teen Says "I Feel Like We're All Survivors Of Abortion"

"In its mild form, men often take to their bed in the week following the birth, complaining of everything from a stomach ache or migraine," claims Dr. Odent. "And in the most graphic example, one perfectly healthy man had his first experience of schizophrenia two days after watching his wife give birth. Was this his way of escaping reality?" Normally, such a statement would have us laughing so hard we'd be curled up into the fetal position but another article — this from the much-respected Guardian — is reporting that male postnatal depression is not only a reality, but a harbinger of future child behavioral problems. Certainly, the story — which comes out of a study at the University of Bristol — makes absolutely no correlation between paternal depression and childbirth, but we have a feeling that Dr. Odent will be taking this latest news and running with it all the way to the NHS maternity wards.

A Top Obstetrician On Why Men Should NEVER Be At The Birth Of Their Child [Daily Mail]
Male Postnatal Depression Affects Child Behaviour, Study Shows [Guardian]

Related: A Perilous Journey From Delivery Room To Bedroom [NY Times]

• Matthew McConaughey baby mama/former model Camila Alves is doing something to really make a difference: She created a handbag line, called Muxo. "We wanted to create something that was unique and not already in the market, and it took us that long to create this. My main goal was to create something where people didn't have to compromise, that it could be exactly what they needed." Someone grab me a tissue, I think she just gave me a reason to keep on livin'. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Say what you will about the Daily Mail but it did put Anna Wintour on its worst-dressed list. [Daily Mail]
  
• Naomi Campbell is rumored to be the face of the Fall 2008 Yves Saint Laurent campaign. Maybe it will have an S&M theme? [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Can we please discuss the placement of Victoria Beckham's breasts in the latest Marc Jacobs ad? [Sassybella]

• Minnie Driver is still solvent, y'all! At last week's L.A. Prada party last week she announced: "I'll have you know I dressed myself tonight. These are my own Prada clothes which I came in and bought!" God bless. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Lauren Conrad's makeup. [BellaSugar]
• An anonymous buyer for an English retailer confesses: "I haven't bought a pair of shoes I can walk in for about two years." This is just great; we are sort of revisiting that whole "bound feet" tradition they had for so long in China. [Telegraph]
• Victoria's Secret looks cheap? No shit! [AdAge]
• Is Madonna done with England and ready to pretend she's Italian? She's wearing (vintage) Dolce & Gabbana on the cover of her new album Hard Candy and Roberto Cavalli for the video of her single "Four Minutes" (which omg co-stars Justin Timberlake.) [WWD, 2nd item]

Finally, more than 50% of women "asked maths questions by their children or family said they struggled to answer them," reports the BBC. If the vintage calculator ad above is any indication — "If you can't remember numbers, Rapidman can!" displayed with a picture of a smiling, groceries clad couple — it's not that the average woman is worse at math than the average man, but that, as the BBC implies, she's just less confident in her abilities. (Age also was a major factor in the poll, as men and women over 55 were the most confident in their mathematical abilities, while 25 to 34-year-olds were the least sure of themselves.) Studies have shown that in the bell curve of mathematical ability, most women end up clustered around the middle, while men more often fall on the high and low ends of the ability spectrum, and in American schools, girls and boys are now equal in their math courses. Once again we say to the Daily Mail: sod off. Your proclamations about women's frivolousness are only discouraging their latent math skills. Danica McKellar, Winne Cooper from the Wonder Years and the co-author of a scientific paper about a theorem in mathematical physics is our new math deity.

[Image via Vintage Ads.]

Earlier: Do We Suck At Math Because Of Biology Or The Patriarchy?
It All Adds Up
A Blast From The Past Brings A Glimmer Of Hope For The Future

But that's not the only singleton news out of England this morning. A report has shown that abortions are more likely among the young and unwed. The Office for National Statistics says that while seven percent of pregnancies among married women are terminated, 35% of pregnancies among single women end in abortion. Additionally, "Women under the age of 20 were most likely to end their pregnancy, with 41.9 per cent ending in termination in 2006," according to the Telegraph. Not that any of this is really shocking news, but if the Daily Mail were writing this article, they'd probably be shaming all those slutty unwed mamas for having premarital sex.

A third story from the Telegraph manages to entwine both the abortion and the suicide statistics. Emma Beck, an artist with a history of depression and anxiety, killed herself after aborting twins. Beck had recently broken up with her boyfriend, "Ben," because he had "reacted badly" to the pregnancy, according to the Telegraph. There was no counselor on duty after Emma terminated her pregnancy, according to her mother, Sylvia, who requested an inquest into the hospital. The doctor who performed the abortion said, "She had a long history of anxiety and depression. Despite my best efforts, she was not willing to see a counselor after the termination." Considering her mental state, Emma was probably not in the ideal position to become a mother — which has nothing really to do with the fact that she was unmarried.

Oh, and by the way: it's Leap Day, traditionally known as the one day out of the year women are supposed to propose to men. So get crackin' on those proposals, so you don't end up offing yourself! Happy February 29th, y'all!

Being Unmarried 'Makes A Woman A Higher Suicide Risk' [Daily Mail]
Abortions More Likely Among Young And Unwed [Telegraph]
Artist Hanged Herself After Aborting Her Twins [Telegraph]
There's No Good Time To Leap Into Marriage With Mr. Good Enough [Seattle P-I]

The women we surveyed (meaning: ourselves) cried more than the men. Three of us, in fact, are huge weepers who will cry at just about anything, while others tear up at things like photos of Harry Connick, Jr. and his daughter, or the injustices of the world. But: almost all of us cry when we're angry or frustrated and can't express it.

As for the dudes, well, most of them (5 total, one gay) fit the Daily Mail's own assessment: two cry in regards to general bereavement (friend who passed away, sick mom); one says he cries over heartbreak, two weep nostalgically about the good old days, and a whopping four dudes say they well up over cliché sports movies: Rudy, Best of the Best and Stomp the Yard among them.

But you know what? Not one guy said he cries because he is angry. We (Anna and I, that is) think it's because male anger is something that's more culturally encouraged and accepted, while women are never really taught how to express their frustration or disgust in a productive way, instead stuffing such unladylike emotions until they explode into weeping.

Personally, I hate that I cry so much. I don't feel like I have control over my tears, and often they derail real discussion; those little salty rivulets can get in the way of real progress. But what about you? Do you cry because your poll numbers are down? Because your boss just denied you a day off? Because you're marinating in your own hormones? Do you get down on yourself for crying, or, do you subscribe to Dodai's philosophy — "Better out than in," which she admits she might have stolen from Shrek. I'd be curious to know.

Tears Are Every Woman's Most Powerful And Manipulative Weapon, But Can Hillary Weep Her Way To The White House? [Daily Mail]

Earlier: Democratic Tear Ducts

As for those who've decided to take the plunge officially, another new study shows that married couples who suppress their anger towards one another are more likely to die. The research, done at the University of Michigan, says that 27% of couples who both suppressed their anger had one member die during the study and 23% of the couples died off in pairs.

The take-away? That couples don't even have to be married to make each other miserable for the rest of their days, and that laundry, dishwashing and domestic duties in general can not only extinguish the flame of passion but literally kill a couple. A suggestion for the Brits: why don't you take that extra £17,370 (the average cost of a UK nuptial these days) and blow it all on housekeepers?

Married Couples Are No Longer The Social Norm [Telegraph]
Goodbye Married Couples, Hello Alternative Family Arrangements [Guardian]
The Equality Hypocrites: It's OK For Women To Work - As Long As They Do The Ironing, Say MEN [Daily Mail]
A Good Fight May Keep You And Your Marriage Healthy [EurekAlert]

Ms. Coppa had this to say: "People who aren't in the situation can say they'll stay and love is enough, but until you're in the situation (living in a hospital, giving catheters, pouring food down a G-tube, hearing a doctor say you might never be able to have kids) you have no fucking clue what you would do. I don't condone cheating (I sure didn't cheat), but I also don't condone people that think a wheelchair or a disability is some sort of life-long binding agreement. Big deal, she took vows. Last time I checked 50% of marriages end in divorce." Uh, our sentiments exactly! What's more, a survey just came out in which half of married Brits are unhappy, and would consider getting a divorce if financial stability were not a problem. Reading that Daily Mail article again, it seems that maybe Linda's only real crime was wearing that awful blue eyeshadow on her wedding day.

*Full disclosure: Christine and I worked together for a brief, shining moment at the doomed Cocktail Magazine.

Holly, 26, met a guy in a bar and, after they'd been seeing each other for two months, found out that he'd been married for three years. Emma, 29, cheated on her boyfriend, Sam, but felt "horribly guilty" about it. Ruth also cheated on her boyfriend and not only felt "terrible" about it, but was "anxious about being caught." Although the article's author, Sadie Nicholas, would have us believe that this posse of women are cocktail-swilling homewreckers, aren't they actually just representative of the rough conditions in any urban dating pool? Since when are married men willing to cheat on their wives victims? And while cheating on a boyfriend isn't ideal behavior, at least the women didn't enter the legally binding contract of marriage and then have an affair. Since the climate around them is such that trust is hard to come by and promises mean little, is it so shocking that these women are a product of their environment? The article's headline asks the questions: "Liberated feminists? Or selfish and deluded?" We think the answer actually "Neither".

Liberated Feminists? Or Selfish and Deluded? Meet the very Modern Mistresses [Daily Mail]

Earlier:
Woman Who Dates Married Men Makes No Apologies But Plenty Of Excuses
Why Do Wives Blame The "Other Woman" For Their Husbands' Wandering Weiners?

There were lots of laughable things about Liz's collected columns, but the best has got to be her attitude towards spending. According to Private Eye, "The failure of Nirpal Dhaliwal to spend more than £375 on his gift for wife Liz Jones last Christmas was a major contributing factor in their subsequent separation." I guess £375 is chump change to a woman who spent £585 on a pair of leggings. On 12/31, Jones wrote: "You have to be careful when wearing leggings...I bought a silver pair by Les Chiffoniers for £585 to wear on Christmas day, but made sure I wore them under a sheer chiffon skirt and a gray cashmere sweater."

A mere week later, Jones has this to say about wasting money: "Rare is the school-age child in this country who has ever been allowed to experience hunger...I have a friend with three young children who admits to spending more than £400 a week on food. There is no longer any concept that you might make do towards the end of the week." Are you making do because you spent all the children's food money on leggings?

The next day Jones asks herself, "What will be my number one style resolution for 2008?" The answer: I must look at myself long and hard in a full-length mirror." Maybe this narcissist will never write another column because she'll be so busy gazing at herself! Ah, we can only dream.

Private Eye [Private Eye]
Liz Jones: I'm Finally, Finally, Finally Divorcing My Husband

Earlier:
Daily Mail Columnist: American Women Are "Mindbogglingly Stupid"

"Do I think female doctors are less able? No, but I know who I'd rather have looking after me," Epstein says. "It's not that I take issue with female success," she continues, but "when power is absolute - say, keeping 200 passengers suspended in mid-air at 500 miles an hour or carrying out life-changing surgery - I want a man to be in charge."

And the fun doesn't stop there! Angela says all women have what she terms the "princess gene":

My chauvinistic feelings may be sourced in the fact that every girl inherits the princess gene which dictates her desire for a strong male role model to cosset and comfort her. I see it in my three-year-old daughter who runs to her older brothers or her daddy when a dog barks at her in the park. She trusts them more than me to protect her.

Moving on, there's also an article in the paper's Femail section about the trials and tribulations of menopause, another one about a a scandalous aristocrat who used to be a dude? Or a hermaphrodite? It's unclear, though she honestly sounds like a lot of fun, and finally, there's an article pondering why women succumb to "slenderlust" that urges women to not be too hard on themselves (an idea we can get behind).

The occasional gem aside, I think we want to mark this (fe)mail return to sender.

I'm A FEMALE Male Chauvinist [Daily Mail]
Requiem For A Lost Youth: Hitting The Menopause [Daily Mail]
A Very Unlady-like Lady: Why High Society Is Terrified Of Lady Colin Campbell [Daily Mail]
Why Are Women So Helplessly Consumed By Slenderlust? [Daily Mail]