Every time I see my mom crying, no matter the circumstances, I absolutely have to start crying too, and vice versa. We don't really get emotional/share-y in other ways, so that's kind of the key to the bond. So yeah, I believe it.
I get headaches every time I cry. All my life. I wish it felt good! It does feel good in other ways. But I know I'm going to pay for it if I start, so I try not to.
@Imogen Quest: I'm not the only one! I hate it when people talk about about a "good cry", and "letting it out" I cry pretty often and it does not feel good to me. I get a killer sinus headache, I get congested, I bawl, my face gets red, my eyelids and nose stay swollen for hours, and If I cry right before bed, they will still be swollen in the morning.
The worst is that I can't stop crying, long after, say, my husband and I have sorted out some misunderstanding and made up. It's like a snowball effect. I'll explain to him that I'm not still upset, I'm just continuing to cry because I can't help it, but, understandably, this is pretty difficult for him to process.
Honestly, it's those times that I can hold myself back from crying that I feel better, physically and emotionally.
I cried watching the Best Damn 50 Baseball Plays last night, and I was alone on the couch. But my personal relationship with Babe Ruth is stronger than ever.
I cried for the first time in ages recently, I'm going through a period of massive upheaval in my life just now and I have been having a lot of very difficult (mostly financial) problems that have all descended upon me at once. I did feel better for it afterwards, though at the time it felt a bit shitty as I was alone and I really just wanted a cuddle.
@Penny: Thanks. I'm getting there. I'm not much of a crier (unless it's a sad movie involving animals - Watership Down destroys me!), normally if I get frustrated or angry I'll just rant and rave to the nearest available ear. But it just all got to be too much. It did help though, I was able to think much more clearly and rationally afterwards.
Since my default emotional response to anything major--happy, sad, angry, etc.--is to cry, my personal relationships must be like titanium. Adamantium, even.
@la.donna.pietra: I am the same way. I cry when I'm sad or angry or tired or frustrated. I hate that I do it and I've tried countless things to stop by that just ends up making it worse, like putting a lid on a boiling pot of water. I just end up exploding.
YES! I have no shame in crying. I hate the fact that being a cryer in society pins me as weak and not worth listening to. The only problem with crying is the resulting headache; maybe due to dehydration?
I find there's a bit of a bell curve. A few tears, I like, intense crying that results in my passing out, that's cool. Anything in between sucks, mostly because I end up with burning, puffy eyes and a clogged nose.
I've never been much of a crier, probably because I grew up in a way too hysterical (manipulative tears and narcissism) household . I treasure calm and serenity. My sisters say I'm in denial, but it seems to be working for me.
Sometimes tears feel cathartic but I think they'd feel a lot physiologically better if they would STOP COMPLETELY CLOGGING MY NASAL PASSAGES. I hate being congested.
Yes, I know why it happens. I just hate that it does.
@redqueenmeg: For reals. I'm always on the brink of congestion due to allergies held just barely at bay by otc medication, and crying unleashes the snot. So, on the one hand, yes, I do feel better (I very rarely cry, and when I do it tends to be a huge release). On the other, I'm a mouth breather for the next six hours.
I don't know that crying helps relationships. I do believe that people who are comfortable with crying are probably more adept at relationships. Being comfortable with crying usually means being comfortable with the vulnerabilty and honesty that feeds relationships. I am not one of those people but Im learning. It aint easy.
So I finally told the BF the other day that I love him (huge!!) and I pretty much cried while telling him. It took me a good 10 minutes to actually say it. I have no idea why I cried, they seem to suggest that I would have been doing it to elicit some sort of emotion from him, which it wasn't. I think it was just a big deal for me to say it, and quite stressful as I have been going over it in my head for a few weeks now for the "perfect moment" and realised that there was no such thing.
In addition, if I have been really stressed out, having a good old cry always helps me out and relieves the stress.
@cuteasabutton: Oooh, congrats! I tend to say that to someone for the first time after much alcohol has been consumed, so I applaud your bravery. Was the response good?
@cuteasabutton: The first time that anyone told me that they loved me, I threw up. When I tried to flush the toilet, the toilet clogged and vomit water went all over the bathroom floor.
You may have cried, but your boyfriend didn't throw up, so you're way ahead of me.
@BiteMeMitchell!: Haha! I've done that with many a stranger met in a bar...The response was good! I didn't get it back, but I told him not to as I wanted him to do it when he feels comfortable too. He did say that he is pretty much there, he cares for me, he just wants it to be special as well. So all good, thanks! :)
@cuteasabutton: Oh I cried the first time I told my boyfriend too! You're not alone. I think having a strong emotional reaction to something like that is better than being ho-hum about it. You'll definitely remember it.
I don't know that crying feels good at the time, but afterward I often feel like a storm has passed and poured over me, washing my mind clean at least for the moment.
For example, it is rarely acceptable to cry in front of your boss at work
Let's see, how many times have I welled up during a meeting that ultimately ends in termination? I tell myself to be strong, but I find that situation the most difficult to control.
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The worst is that I can't stop crying, long after, say, my husband and I have sorted out some misunderstanding and made up. It's like a snowball effect. I'll explain to him that I'm not still upset, I'm just continuing to cry because I can't help it, but, understandably, this is pretty difficult for him to process.
Honestly, it's those times that I can hold myself back from crying that I feel better, physically and emotionally.
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YES! I have no shame in crying. I hate the fact that being a cryer in society pins me as weak and not worth listening to. The only problem with crying is the resulting headache; maybe due to dehydration?
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Yes, I know why it happens. I just hate that it does.
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doesn't help right now that I'm pregnant and can't take much allergy medicine anyway plus I always feel like crying. I am a soggy mess. Ew.
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I don't know that crying helps relationships. I do believe that people who are comfortable with crying are probably more adept at relationships. Being comfortable with crying usually means being comfortable with the vulnerabilty and honesty that feeds relationships. I am not one of those people but Im learning. It aint easy.
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In addition, if I have been really stressed out, having a good old cry always helps me out and relieves the stress.
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You may have cried, but your boyfriend didn't throw up, so you're way ahead of me.
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Let's see, how many times have I welled up during a meeting that ultimately ends in termination? I tell myself to be strong, but I find that situation the most difficult to control.
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