1:10 PM
Ok in my seat @ duckie. Swag is a men's shaving kit (with a brush and everything) and a box of RIT dye. Mine is kelly green. I am going to try to spy in other people's bags to see what color they got.

Hmm, Guy next to me got green too. He seems super puzzled by the dye. Dude, aren't we all.

In the front row are these people I was chatting with before: A middle-aged-ish woman and her 13-yr old niece. The older cousin is friends with the designers and they met her cousin and invited her to the show
This is her first-ever fashion show, she told me, and the other kids in school are all really jealous. I am glad her first show is menswear. Now she'll just think fashion is cool and fun and quirky and not about anorexia. Also this crowd seems more...oh, how shall I put it? It's more gay men and less bitchy women.
As opposed to the usual 50-50 split at most shows. Subsequently, there is an air of bonhomie, as opposed to silent judgment, in the air

1:15
Ooh the music is starting. It almost sounds funereal; Lots of organ, think fast-paced phantom of the opera. Ok they're taking the plastic off the runway...

If I were a gay man, this music would make me want to dance around in a g-string and do poppers. Everyone's swaying in their seats to the music. If I didn't know better, I would think this was an episode of Pinky & The Brain. And that the music is here to make us never want to stop swaying in unison so the Brain can take over the world.

1:30
Ok lights are going down...it's starting...They turned the music all the way down. There's a very slim, tailored suit with an full blouse underneath. Very cool. And a wool coat I want for myself! Ooh and this hooded grandpa sweater in green. I would totally wear that.

Everything's in black and grey and green is the only color. Haha, someone just whistled at one of the male models - and considering we're sitting here in silence, it was awkward.

Ah - a purple hat! And a purple suit that almost looks like a dress from behind?

These slouchy knit caps are fierce. I even think I could talk my boyfriend into one of those

1:35 PM
A sheer crochet sweater, however? Not so much. Same goes for the glittery sweater. And the blouses being shown underneath the suiting

And...it's over. I think my straight man would wear the plaid shirt, the windbreaker-puffy jackets, and I would beg him to try one of those hats. And I want a hat and that green sweater for myself, all the way!
Gender roles: who needs 'em?

P.S. Overheard by a fellow attendee exiting the show: "I loved all the papery weirdness!"

Of course, the seating arrangements are a headache unto themselves: "Editors from important publications are seated in the front two rows. Those from regional magazines and newspapers usually sit farther back. Buyers from the same retailer are positioned near each other but far from the competition. Care is taken not to give junior executives better seats than their bosses." The PR companies also send private cars for celebrities — knowing that if they do, the celeb has a higher chance of actually showing up. Alison Brod, of Alison Brod Public Relations, which handled the Rosa Chá show, admits that the shows "aren't hugely profitable," but raise the profile of the designer and the PR company. But if this whole thing seems like a lot of wasted time and effort, rest assured that some restraint was exercised:

The size and weight of the invitation required postage of 97 cents, but the $1 stamp had beige and maroon tones that clashed with the envelope. [Pam Morris, the 27-year-old account supervisor] thought three 41-cent stamps with brightly colored flowers would look better, but chose the $1 stamps because she couldn't justify the added cost.

A Fashion Show's Backstage Drama: Luring Celebrities to the Audience [WSJ]
Earlier: First Impressions: Rosa Cha Show "Kind Of Like A Joke From Zoolander"

It's shocking, we know, but some people take Fashion Week really, really seriously. Designers shudder and quake in anticipation as the world's top "fashion journalists" pull out their best and most pretentious purple prose reviewing the Spring/Summer 2008 collections. In our final primer on what the major critics" have to say about the shows at New York Fashion Week, we've got Zac Posen, Heatherette, Donna Karan, Calvin Klein, and Betsey Johnson. First up, red-carpet favorite Zac Posen drops a touch of 'Little House on the Prairie' onto the runway.

"lacks...restraint", "inspired by Pilgrims, Amish, Mennonites and Shaker", "restraint was positively mandatory", "at his best with his day wear", "flirtatious white ruffles", "expressed a sweet exuberance" — Robin Givhan, Washington Post

"unlikely inspirations", "big-sky romance", "a softness that his more overtly sexy work lacks", "strayed into dangerous pastures", "as poufy as storm-whipped clouds", "more than a little showy", "a country no-no" — Nicole Phelps, Style.com

"vaguely safari", "smart, modern and controlled", "a lack of restraint is his biggest problem", "his greatest indulgence is the big, splashy finish", "more like the twilight zone" —WWD

"short and sweet", "endearing youthfulness", "wheat sheaves shaped as crystal brooches", "rural spirit", "puffy with volume", "thoughtful" — Suzy Menkes, International Herald Tribune

"evoked the wheat fields of the Great Plains", "dramatic beauty of the wind-tossed, open sky", "hand-painted and shadow-dyed", "bold and dramatic as a thunder-clap", "shot with lightning shafts of colour and extravagant shapes" — Hilary Alexander, Daily Telegraph

Heatherette
"fun", "surefire", "the models look like wayward brides in a sort of backward couture show", "big red-white-and-blue dose of Americana", "picnic-table print", "Wearable? Sure, a little" — Meenal Mistry, Style.com

"send-up of the U.S. of A.", "delightful high-energy romp", "wasn't all over-the-top camp", "their share of wacky red, white and blue getups", "some chic - and no less whimsical".— WWD

Donna Karan
"classy halter and shirt-dresses", "waist was the focus", "flattering", "recalled... women airing themselves on their stoops on a hot summer night, usually within sight of a man in an undershirt" — Cathy Horyn, NY Times

"women as urban warriors", "had the feel of an urban princess", "more comfortable in a garden setting than surrounded by the city's concrete and steel" — Robin Givhan, Washington Post

"worked both sides of the structure/flow divide", "portrait collars", "crisp, breezy", "confident sensuality", "the silhouette was lean and languid or full", "arabesques of silk ribbon" — Nicole Phelps, Style.com

Betsey Johnson
"petticoated party dresses dashed with decorations like sprinkles on a cupcake", "sequins, hearts, laces, and lamé", "deliberate act of indulgence", "huge crinolines", "Empire waists and daisies". — Laird Borrelli-Persson, Style.com

"cacophony of tulle", "no one does a party dress like Johnson", "sparkly", "polkadots and stripes galore", "pink-and-yellow paisley playsuits", 'downright patriotic", "modern-day sailor jumpsuits", "frocks didn't seem to vary much style-wise". — WWD

Calvin Klein
"a job well done", "will gain more meaning with time", "breezy", "egg-wash shades", "the hemlines of the dresses might have been better shorter", "all the models in the show were white", "seems out of touch" — Cathy Horyn, NY Times

"equivalent of a sexy whisper", "austere", "unforgiving fabrics", "faintest gray shadings", "sensuous drape", "its strength was in the purity of the design" — Robin Givhan, Washington Post

"spare, clean canvas", "wasn't enough", "quiet repetitiveness", "minimalist in the style of old-school Calvin" — Nicole Phelps, Style.com

"shimmer of silk", "subtle shades of sea and river water", "exceptional", "succeeded in reigniting minimalism", "modern and relevant" — Suzy Menkes, International Herald Tribune

We shop at Forever 21, so maybe we're not the best judges of what's new, fresh, of-the-moment (and other 'Lucky'-isms) in fashion. We have a few Marc Jacobs items, but they were on clearance at Century 21 and probably from five years ago, so that's why we've let the critics speak about the fashion darling's show the other night — you know, the one that started two hours late, and pissed off a bunch of people, including 'Vogue' editor Anna Wintour.

"...expressed perfectly the dislocating values of our culture", "an antidote to the cartoonish Jessica Rabbit sexuality", "stripped-down dresses to break the hold of flagrant sexiness", "erotic", "respectful of women", "beautiful, as well as realistic", "deal openly and imaginatively with sexuality without exploiting it". — Cathy Horyn, NY Times

"...could have used a little more time", "on their own, individual elements... were very attractive", "wearable clothes wasn't the point here", "clothes appropriate for warmer weather", "color-blocking, sheer overlays, sequins", "nude and natural colors with bright pops" — Samantha Critchell, Washington Post

"Extraordinary", "off-kilter and knock-your-socks-off", "a bonkers surrealist streak", "transparency was a key theme", "Gimmicky? You bet. But also fascinating", "gawky and awkward", "provocative", "sublime performance was about sex", "couldn't look away" — Nicole Phelps, Style.com

"a pseudo-Surrealist stab at fashion", "too-big shoes, raw seams, ugly juxtapositions of table-cloth plastic and metallic lace in virulent hues", "unfinished, underwear-exposing", "the height of designer-label luxury", "failed to impress" — Hilary Alexander, Daily Telegraph

"not his strongest, but still, it was great", "a succession of mad hair, mad shoes, kooky glasses and zany clothes", "all wasted, batty church secretary in 1953", "rejoices...in the weird and wonderful moments that make dressing unique" — Amy Larocca, NY Mag

"fairy-tale farce", "inventive layerings", "brilliantly fantastical", "will dazzle all as brightly in their retail incarnations", "haute florals and adorable animalia", "hussy sheers", "a delightfully costumed experimental sexcapade". — WWD

Earlier: Marc Jacobs Channels 'Grey Gardens'? We Beg To Differ
WaPo Fashion Critic Robin Givhan's Dog Molests Shoes; Marc Jacobs Is To Blame

Earlier: Marc Jacobs Channels 'Grey Gardens'? We Beg To Differ

[Images via AP]

Earlier: Retro Fashion: Edie Beale On The "Best Costume For The Day"