Come On, How Often Do You Really Have to Poop on a Date?

I'm not trying to stir up, er, poo, but I have to ask: How often do you really need to drop a deuce on a date? Isn't this precisely the sort of thing you would do before a date, like, as part of your whole getting ready for the date thing? Shit shower shave is not just for dudes, k? But a book out soon promises to… » 3/21/14 7:00pm 3/21/14 7:00pm

Here Is a Photo of Bright Blue Toddler Poop

I am not a person who is easily shocked, especially when it comes to shit. One time I watched with a blank face as a man took a dump on 40th Street and 10th Avenue and then wiped his butt by dragging his crack up the corner of a building. Whatever, it happens. But the unnatural rainbow of crap that's come out of my… » 12/13/13 1:40pm 12/13/13 1:40pm

Jezebel's Advent Calendar of Crap, Day 10: A Rosemary's Baby Remake???

It wasn't enough for NBC to announce it would annually desecrate a beloved musical, in what may be the worst commercial holiday tradition of all time (worse even than the Lexus December to Remember Sales Event). No, today the network also announced it's green lit a four-hour miniseries remake of Rosemary's Baby.… » 12/10/13 5:20pm 12/10/13 5:20pm

If You're Not Examining Your Poop, You're Not Living

What goes in, must come out — and when it does come out, it's basically a murky crystal ball into your gastrointestinal health. Poo is the funky combo of water, fiber, bacteria, cells, and mucus that fills your toilet bowl — and that's all good. However, when weird colors, textures, and consistencies get up in the… » 4/10/13 12:05pm 4/10/13 12:05pm

Marketers Can't Wait to Use Olympic Gold Medalist Gabby Douglas to Sell…

If you're anything like me, when you watched American gymnast Gabby Douglas compete in the individual all-around finals, you had much less composure as a spectator than the eventual gold medalist did as a competitor. And when she won and waved with the poise and calm confidence of tiny American royalty, you may… » 8/03/12 7:00pm 8/03/12 7:00pm

The Catholic Church Urges Women to Not Be So Darn Picky

The Catholic Church is quite fond of giving women impractical and terrible advice, but one priest in Australia is taking it to a whole new level. New statistics suggest that there are far fewer eligible men in Australia than there are women between the ages of 25 and 34. Cue a marriage crisis! Father Tony Kerin… » 5/07/12 10:00am 5/07/12 10:00am

An Open Letter To Chuck D: What Do You Think Of Flavor Flav Now?

Dear Chuck D, So last night I checked out Flav's new show Under One Roof — the MyNetwork sitcom that can best be described as The Fresh Prince of Bel Air meets a KKK cartoon — and I was wondering if you checked it out. 'Cause if you had, you woulda seen that it's horribly minstrel-y, stupid, sexist, and most offensive… » 4/24/08 3:00pm 4/24/08 3:00pm

The One Thing (Besides Take A Dump) You Never Do In Front Of Dudes

About ten of you have emailed from Esquire about the things a man should never do in the company of a woman, like cleaning your gun or talking about the girls you used to fuck or "rapping" or blow-drying their hair. It's fun but not incredibly accurate; most of the dealbreakers, like calling a girl a "whore" in a way… » 2/26/08 5:30pm 2/26/08 5:30pm