• Heidi Klum is changing her name to Heidi Samuel! Did you know that her husband's real name is Seal Henry Olusegun Olumide Adelo Samuel? Short and sweet. [TMZ]

• Last night, David Letterman apologized to female staffers and his wife, saying: "She's been horribly hurt by my behavior. If you hurt a person and it's your responsibility, you try to fix it. At that point, there's only two things that can happen. Either you make some progress and get it fixed, or you're going to fall short and perhaps not get it fixed… Let me tell you folks, I've got my work cut out for me." [NY Daily News]
• David Letterman may have violated CBS rules about supervisor/subordinate relationships. But. David Letterman doesn't work for CBS; he works for Worldwide Pants, his production company. WWP says, "We have a written policy in our employee manual that covers harassment. It is circulated to every employee every year. Dave is not in violation of our policy and no one has ever raised a complaint against him." [TMZ]
• Former Late Show staffer Stephanie Birkitt's diary reveals that she continued having sex with David Letterman even after moving in with her CBS-producer boyfriend. Birkitt told her boyfriend that the relationship was platonic and that she was "just his best friend." [NY Post]
• Craig Ferguson defended David Letterman last night: "The person you work for, the person you admire and respect, is caught in an embarrassing situation," he said. "And your job is to be funny about that, whilst trying to keep your own job." [AP]
• Roman Polanski will find out whether he will be granted a release from prison sometime this week. His legal team filed an appeal on September 29, and the Swiss government should issue a ruling by Friday. [AP]
• Uh-oh: A woman named Regina Kimbell says she showed Chris Rock her 2005 documentary, My Nappy Roots, on the set of his TV show Everybody Hates Chris back in 2007. She believes he stole her idea and turned it into Good Hair, which opens Friday. She's looking for $5 million. [TMZ]
• The judge in the Gosselin case has did not make a decision yesterday regarding the cash Jon withdrew from the joint account. We should hear something soon, though. [TMZ]
• Zondervan, the publishing house that printed Kate Gosselin's earlier books, Multiple Bles8ings and Eight Little Faces is not promoting her third book, Love is in the Mix: Making Meals into Memories on its Web site any longer. The book was supposed to come out in the fall… [MSNBC Scoop]
• OMFG: Lady Gaga on Gossip Girl? Whee! My head is exploding! [Gatecrasher]
• An LA judge ruled Friday that Dr. Arnold Klein — Michael Jackson's dermatologist — does not have the right to raise concern about the welfare of any of Jackson's three children. When asked if he had any legal relationship with the kids, the doctor was "evasive." [NY Post]
• Carrie Fisher's show, Wishful Drinking, suggests that Brad Pitt's public love triangle with Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie is the modern-day equivalent of her dad, Eddie Fisher, leaving mom Debbie Reynolds for raven-haired temptress Elizabeth Taylor. Jennifer Aniston went to see the show! Carries says: "She's a very nice girl. I didn't speak to her, but I heard that she liked it. At least, I hope she liked it." [Gatecrasher]
• The Madonna wedding pix case: Settled. She's accepted a "substantial" amount after suing the owners of The Mail for publishing stolen photos of her wedding to Guy Ritchie. [Mirror]
• "Kate Moss had a bust-up with rocker boyfriend Jamie Hince after she was grabbed by a man in a banana hammock thong at Simon Cowell's $1.6 million 50th birthday bash." [Page Six]
• Russell Brand is in love. Possibly with Katy Perry. He says: "I think I'm in love." [The Sun]
• So many Mad Men weddings! Christina Hendricks, Elisabeth Moss and now Bryan Batt, aka Salvatore Romano. He plans to marry his longtime partner, events planner Tom Cianfichi. A source says it could be Christmas in Vermont. Whee! [Ace Showbiz]
• "Naomi Watts has been named as the Hollywood actress who gives the best return on the money she is paid. The 41-year-old star's last three films made $44 for every $1 she was paid to appear." [Telegraph]
• Amy Winehouse will sing on BBC One's Strictly Come Dancing this weekend — as a backup singer for her goddaughter, 13-year-old Dionne Bromfield. [BBC News]
• Have we decided who would make a better Prince Harry? Robert Pattinson or Rupert Grint? [Telegraph]
• Brooke Burns' dog is missing. [People]
• "The 'husband' divorced by Little Britain star Matt Lucas ten months ago hanged himself yesterday. Kevin McGee, 32, who wed the comic in a 2006 civil ceremony, left a suicide note on Facebook. It declared: 'Kevin McGee thinks death is much better than life.'" [The Sun]
• Kevin McGee "is thought to have become deeply depressed over the past few months after breaking up with the comedian, and friends reported that his drug-taking had spiraled out of control." [Daily Mail]
• "Little Britain star Matt Lucas has pulled out of his lead role in a London play after the death of his former partner Kevin McGee." [BBC News]
• Someone had a seizure during an intense scene during screening of Lars von Trier's Antichrist. You know, the one where Charlotte Gainsbourg tortures Willem Dafoe's twig and berries? [Page Six]
• "The blunt truth is weed-loving rapper Method Man may go to jail because he 'forgot' to pay his taxes." [NY Post]
• Layne Staley may be gone, but Alice In Chains lives on. [CNN]
• Dr. Phil is going to be a grandpa. The kind who knows everything. [People]
• It's been 20 years since Lenny Kravitz's Let Love Rule was released? I feel old. [NY Post]
• Whatshisname is calling his divorce a "never-ending nightmare." [The Sun]
• Whatshername is planning a divorce party. [The Sun]
• "I thought I was going to die for real. I should have felt safe but at a certain point of climbing a mountain, you're in a cloud and you hear a noise that is electricity — what can they do to protect you from electricity in the cloud you're in? So they were like, 'Sit on your bag, it's made of rubber'. I went, 'Why?' They said, 'So you don't get electrocuted'. I was like, 'Hang on, I'm on a TV show!' …I prayed. It was probably about half an hour and this is after two previous meltdowns begging Jack - like, 'Cut! Seriously, rescue me!' and he was like, 'From where? There's nowhere a helicopter can land', so I had to get to the summit to get off." — Natalie Imbruglia on working with Jack Osbourne on his TV show Celebrity Adrenaline Junkie. [News.com.au]
• "I'm tired of holding this in. I don't know what to do with it anymore, so, I've decided to give some of it away." — Tyler Perry, on revealing details about his unhappy childhood, abusive father and being molested by a female neighbor at the age of 10. [NY Daily News]
• "I'm insane or stupid. I can't figure out which." — Former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, on performing on Dancing With The Stars despite stress fractures in both feet. [NY Daily News]
• "Anyone who thinks we move in a post-racial society is someone who's been smoking crack." — Spike Lee, 20 years after the release of Do The Right Thing. [Guardian]
• "He's got all these strong women working for him. Strong women survive there." — An anonymous Late Show staffer, on David Letterman. [MSNBC]
• "Less is more. When I wear too much make-up, I feel like a man in drag. I prefer to be low maintenance." — Halle Berry, to In Style. [MSNBC]

The book documents the same pins featured in an exhibition at the Museum of Arts and Design. The project is called Read My Pins: Stories from a Diplomat's Jewelry Box. Albright's extensive collection features around 300 pins, and while that does include a few expensive pieces, most of them are cheap, fun costume jewelry. The title is a play on George H. W. Bush's controversial phrase, "read my lips."


Albright tells NPR about the history of her relationship with the faux-jewels, which began when an Iraqi newspaper ran a poem about the diplomat, which contained the lines "Albright, Albright, all right, all right, you are the worst in this night" and called her an "unparalleled serpent." She recalls,

This all started when I was an ambassador at the United Nations, Sadam Hussein called me a serpent, and I had this one antique snake pin, and so when we were dealing with Iraq, I wore a snake pin. And I thought, 'well, this is fun.' Then I went out, and bought a bunch of costume jewelry to signal what my mood of the day was.

The serpent pin that sparked a trend in fashionable politics is featured on the back cover of her book.


Albright has a lot of critter pins, and her collection seems to feature a disproportionate number of insect pins. She reveals that some bug pins were symbolic "protest pins." She wore a huge bertle pin after the Russians were caught taping the State Department, to send a non-so-subtle message about her anger. When she wanted to "do a little stinging or deliver a tough message," she chose a wasp pin. Butterfly pins meant the opposite, as did her hot air balloons.


Albright also has several bird pins, some of which were gifts, some of which she gave as gifts. Apparently, choosing the right present for a foreign diplomat is a tricky thing, which requires a good deal of care. She says she tried to find "mementos that reflected the United States," like this gold eagle. She also wore an eagle pin to talk with Craig Ferguson, to reflect the fact that they are both naturalized Americans, "which makes us very patriotic."

One of Albright's most notable winged-pins is a simple gold dove, given to her by Leah Rabin, wife of slain Israeli Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin. She wore the "peace dove" to visit the victims of genocide in Rwanda.


Albright says this pin shows the glass ceiling "in its ideal condition: shattered." She says was "so proud" to become the first woman to serve as Secretary of State and "thrilled" when Hillary Clinton took on the same position. However, unlike some politicians, she recognizes that the glass ceiling has yet to be shattered. She tells Forbes that sometimes she finds the media's obsession with her outfits frustrating:

It can be occasionally maddening. As Secretary of State, you are actually doing very important business and delivering tough messages. But no matter what, people were concerned with what I was wearing, the level of my hemline. It can be kind of demeaning, depending on the situation.

But Albright does have some great advice on how to wear pins. She says the location is very, very important. First of all, one must, at all costs, avoid the dreaded "Hooters effect." She tells Newsweek that she has begun to wear her pins higher and higher as the years go on. She also touches on the dangers of bear hugs:

There are some people who wear them on the right side, some on the left side. Some wear them on their lapels. I keep wearing my pins higher and higher. It just goes to show what happens in diplomacy. I was visiting South Korea. There were always good relations and nice dialogue. But there was a Korean foreign minister who thought he was not on the record and was having some fun, and said that he loves it when Secretary Albright would come to Seoul because we had a nice relationship and we were about the same age, but he was like an old man and I was so vigorous and besides when he gave me a hug I had very firm breasts. All of a sudden there was this outcry over this and there were questions about whether would he have to resign for saying that. So they asked me what I thought, and I said, "Well, I've got to have somewhere to put those pins." So that helped, but the next time we saw each other, we shook hands at a very respectful distance, no more hugging.

Another cool feature of the book is the "Pindex" at the back, which catalogs her numerous pins with page numbers and dates. But now that all of her pins are being displayed behind glass, Albright has nothing to wear. Fortunately, people have been stopping her on the street to give her "pity pins." "Yesterday, for instance, I was walking around and somebody gave me a pin that said, ‘Chicks Rock,'" she says, in an interview with the Daily Beast. "So, I think that's kind of fun."


Albright's Pin Diplomacy [Daily Beast]
Big Pin [New Yorker]
Madeleine Albright's Jewelry-Box Diplomacy [NPR]
10 Minutes With Madeleine Albright [Forbes]
Albright's Legacy: Read My Pins [WWD]
Read My Pins: Stories From A Diplomat's Jewel Box [Harper Collins]
Madeleine Albright On The Pins She Wore [Newsweek]

Related: Madeleine Albright On Wingnuts, Lapel-Wear & Bill Clinton's Love Of Women

All Images Via Harper Collins

• Someone's been arrested in the Lindsay Lohan home burglary case — and it's not Lindsay Lohan!

Nicholas Prugo, 18, was arrested Thursday in connection with two break-ins: Lindsay's house and Audrina Patridge's house. Dina Lohan says: "Yes, we have found him, God is good." Man, we were sold on that In Touch story alleging that Lindsay robbed herself. [People, TMZ, TMZ]

• Lisa Ling will return to The View as a guest host on October 5. [ONTD]
• Elton John, who was branded "unsuitable" to adopt a Ukranian toddler because he's gay and old, may be able to be the kid's "guardian," which means the mother retains parental rights. The child is not an orphan, though he lives in a children's home; his brother lives there, too. [Daily Mail]
• Michael Jackson's family thinks the This Is It movie is propaganda, to back AEG's claims that he was fit and healthy and ready to tour. [Page Six]
• Sad face: They're calling off the search for Jessica Simpson's dog, last seen in the jaws of a coyote. [TMZ]
• Halle Berry: Not pregnant, just full of burgers. [People]
• Although how Halle Berry could be full of burgers and get in to that dress is a mystery wrapped in an enigma, with special sauce, lettuce and cheese. [Daily Mail]
• BREAKING: Amy Winehouse had a lovely evening out with a "mystery man." [The Star, Mirror]
• Mystery solved: The dude Amy Winehouse was with is former flame Tyler James. A fan asked her for a kiss and she said, "Sorry, I'm with my boyfriend." [Daily Mail]
• While Chris Brown is doing his community service, he has three off-duty cops watching over him as a security team. [TMZ]
• Jennifer Garner is a prankster on movie sets. [Gatecrasher]
• Jennifer Lopez wore a dress by Victoria Beckham to the White House and it was… fitted. [Daily Mail]
• Avril Lavigne's marriage is really over. She posted a message on her blog which reads: "Deryck and I have been together for 6 and a half years. We have been friends since I was 17, started dating when I was 19, and married when I was 21. I am grateful for our time together… I admire Deryck and have a great amount of respect for him. Deryck and I are separating and moving forward on a positive note." [TMZ]
• Kanye West has been invited to the next Friars Club roast. [Page Six]
• Kanye West has been nominated for 9 BET awards. Will he show up? [NY Daily News]
• Kate Gosselin will be shooting the pilot for her new TV show with Paula Deen this weekend. The idea is to have several hosts, like The View, and comedian Sandra Bernhard and Tammy Lynn Michaels have both been considered for the job. [Radar]
• Paula Abdul told a radio DJ that she's going to be producing a show in Las Vegas and is also working on a project with the Laker Girls. [Eva Amurri, strip down for Californication, by all means, click the link. [Daily Mail]
• Samantha Burke, the lady impregnated by Jude Law, is possibly getting £120,000 from a magazine for pictures when the baby is born. [ Daily Mail]
• Someone showed the nuns at Sacred Heart girls school in New York video of Lady Gaga on stage bleeding; she is an alumna of the school. The nuns were not amused. [Page Six]
• Khloe Kardashian and NBA star Lamar Odom: Getting married. They've been "talking about rings." [E!]
• Is Anna Kournikova pregnant? Rumor has it she's carrying the spawn of Enrique Iglesias. [Gatecrasher]
• Ivanka Trump is keeping it classy and not selling wedding pictures, just releasing a single one. [Page Six]
• A man has been arrested for assaulting a security guard who tried to stop him from getting in a car with Ryan Seacrest. [AP]
• Clint Eastwood and Matt Damon just worked together on Invictus, and they will team up again for Hereafter, a thriller from Peter Morgan, who wrote Frost/Nixon and The Queen. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• A journalist asked Spike Lee if Do The Right Thing would get made today. "It would be very hard to make a film like this today," Lee said. "Not because the subject is irrelevant. I don't think the studios would do this. I have to thank Tom Pollock who was running Universal Pictures at the time. He put the weight of the studio behind me for this film and supported me, even when people wanted to waver and divorce themselves from the film." [Independent]
• "Of The Infernal Comedy: Confessions of a Serial Killer, the opera about the prostitute-mauling Jack Unterweger, that opened this year in Vienna and will tour in Europe and Canada next summer, John Malkovich says: 'It's actually a comedy.'" [The Daily Beast]
• Anna Nicole Smith is no longer with us, but she owes the State of California $43,280.66 in back taxes. [TMZ]
• The battle at the box office this weekend will be family-friendly Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs versus horror send-up Jennifer's Body versus the crappy-looking Love Happens with Jennifer Aniston and Aaron Eckhart. Odds are, Meatballs will win. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Joe Perry is pissed that Aerosmith had to cancel their summer tour because of Steven Tyler's injuries. "I haven't talked to him in over five weeks. I don't know what's going on with him," Perry says. "All I know is he's got to get his act together. I mean, he and I haven't written a song together alone in the same room in over ten years, so there's been some changes in paradigm of what Aerosmith is." [AP]
• The director of The Cove, an award-winning documentary about Japan's dolphin slaughter, plans to attend a screening at the Tokyo film festival even though he could be arrested. [AP]
• "Miley Cyrus, Kelly Clarkson, Jordin Sparks lack power to carry 'Divas' label at VH1 concert… No matter the age, it seems, all one needs to be a diva in the land of VH1 is to miss a Y chromosome." [NY Daily News]
• RIP Guiding Light. [NY Post]
• Katie "Jordan" Price has been questioned by cops over her claims that she was raped by a celebrity. [Daily Mail, The Sun, The Sun ]
• Blind items! "With their partners away, celebs have been using Fashion Week as an opportunity to play! Which two pop stars made sweet music on Sunday night after the gal gave the guy a private lap dance? Hope his longtime girlfriend doesn't find out ... Which supermodel mended her recently broken heart over the weekend with the very-engaged bassist of a hot rock band?" [Gatecrasher]
• Q: When you auditioned for The Late Late Show, the producers told you that they loved the way you actually held conversations with the guests. A: "Yeah, apparently no one does that anymore. Instead, publicists work out what we'll say and who's gonna ask what. I'll ask you, 'Oh you bought a house?' And you say, 'Yeah I just moved and I got a dog.' And I'll say 'Tell me about the dog, is it named Spunky?' And you'll say 'Yeah, Spunky!' I don't do that." — Craig Ferguson. [Time]
• "It's pretty sad. She should have watched it more closely, though. She should have been more careful." — Martha Stewart, on Jessica Simpson's coyote-snatched dog. [Page Six]
• "Have you been in a Kmart lately? It is not the nicest place to shop." — Martha Stewart, whose products were sold at Kmart but will now be at Macy's and Home Depot. [ONTD via Daily Finance]
• "They took a beautiful man and put poison in his body. Why couldn't they have built him up nutritionally and got ten rid of the toxins? …I hate to be this controversial … but I have to speak out." — Suzanne Somers on Patrick Swayze. [Page Six]
• "I think that the music itself is very, very fun for the most part. I have a few more ballady, emotional songs. But lyrically, it's a little more docile - the music is very fun. I guess it's dance music - it's electro-driven but it's still soft." — Leighton Meester, on her new album. [ONTD]
• "When I read the pilot script, I thought, 'What a fun part this would be to play. How fun would this be?' But then all of these people said, 'It's perfect! You're perfect for it!' [My character] Jeff is a liar and a jerk. What am I supposed to say to that? 'Yeah, I guess so! Awesome!' It really makes me go, 'Wait, what do you mean?'" — Joel McHale on new show Community. [LA Times]
• "It's really, really awkward - any time you do a kissing scene or a love scene it's awkward but especially with this one. Neither one of us wanted to do it and we were both terrified but when you do scenes like that it's not at all sensual or sexy. You're in a room and it's full of these middle-aged crew guys who are like eating their sunflower seeds waiting for you to get it right so they can go home to their kids. They just don't want to be there." — Megan Fox on her kiss with Amanda Seyfried in Jennifer's Body. [Mirror]
• "The Office is not one of those things you move away from. I don't want it to go away." — John Krasinski. [Guardian]

• Lindsay Lohan thew a fit at the G-Star runway show:

She arrived with sister Ali in tow, wouldn't pose for photos and didn't like her seats. So, naturally, she threw the seating cards for Juliette Lewis, Christian Siriano, and Taylor Momsen on the floor. When event producers tried to approach her, she sniped, "Don't fucking touch me," and rolled her eyes. Of course, I found pix of her posing so grain of salt. [Page Six]

• Mischa Barton was at the G-star after party, drunk and saying "Like, I'm with the deejay. I totally know the deejay. I'm here for the deejay." [Page Six]
• Kanye West and Lady Gaga were supposed to start a Fame Kills tour later this fall, but it looks like Kanye may have been serious about taking some time off: Tour date listings have been removed from the Ticketmaster website. [LA Times]
• Pink has a separated shoulder! "It hurts," she says. She couldn't do any of the aerial parts of her trapeze-oriented show in Seattle on Tuesday night, but won't cancel tour dates. [People]
• Katie Holmes took Suri to Beyoncé's concert in Australia on Tuesday night, and Suri wore "industrial earmuffs." [News.com.au]
• Jennifer Lopez was spotted at the White House "with an entourage bigger than President Obama's Secret Service detail." [NY Daily News]
• Chris Brown's community service has begun; click for a pic of him in an orange vest. He doesn't seem too… contrite; he Tweeted, "check out my outfit." [Ny Daily News]
• Why haven't we seen Mo'Nique promoting new film Precious? She will be on the Today show this morning, but she wasn't at the Toronto Film festival (Mariah Carey, Gabby Sidibe, Sherri Shephard, and Paula Patton were there) and rumors are that she wants to be paid for appearances. A studio spokesperson says it isn't true. [Showbiz 411]
• Charlize Threron is naked in the opening scene of her new film, The Burning Plain but says: "I'm not some exhibitionist. I think people think I just love walking around naked. When you start making it about yourself, you stand in the way of doing your job. I have to sit in an editing room with [director] Guillermo Arriaga and a bunch of execs, and if I had to sit there and think about myself and these men watching me, I think that would make me insecure. I'm just like every other girl out there. I would cringe." And: "There was a time in my life where I understood actors who said they don't like watching themselves. But when I made the mental switch that I was not watching myself and watching an actual character, that was the day I actually could look at things from a distance." [USA Today]
• "The uncle Desperate Housewives star Teri Hatcher helped put behind bars for molesting two girls has died in prison." [Daily Express]
• Sean Penn and beyond foxy Sports Illustrated model Jessica White: "Together all the time." [NY Daily News]
• Jason Schwartzman's new HBO show, Bored To Death, his most high-profile roles ever. Although he also loves books and music, acting gives him focus: "When I all of sudden became a part of Rushmore, it was like a giant acupuncture needle or something. It just put everything in line for me. It was like going to the emotional chiropractor. I was so disjointed as a teenager, from being unpopular or from being not the guy that girls liked - just feeling like an outsider, just being a dork." [AP]
• Nicole Kidman will star in The Danish Girl, about the first man to undergo a sex-change operation in 1931. I know it's early but I have to say that I'm sort of scared about the medical technology back then and its proximity to genitalia. [NY Daily News]
• Bruce Willis and wife: Moving into L.A.'s new Carlyle Residences, where apartments go for $2.9-$15 million. The new pad has a private wine cellar and elevator. [E!]
• Rod Stewart's son Sean was a riding in a $200,000 Bentley on Sunset Boulevard in L.A. when his friend wrecked the car. Sean was renting it from Beverly Hills Rent-A-Car for $2,500 a day. [TMZ]
• Jasmine Guy: Deep in debt, thanks to a divorce. In related news, she has joined the cast of the new CW show Vampire Diaries as the GRANDMOTHER of one of the characters. A different world, indeed. [TMZ, Buddy TV]
• Director Jane Campion got an admiring letter from Quentin Tarantino about her latest effort, Bright Star. "It was a love letter, really, about the film," she says. "I am really touched. He is one of my biggest heroes of the current generation, I think he is a genius so it was surprising." Asked about what it takes to make movies likes hers, Campion said with a smile: "I am not very submissive." [Reuters]
• Joe Francis tried to crash a party being thrown by Frankie Delgado but was thrown out, mostly because Frankie is bff with Brody Jenner and Brody and Joe had a scuffle a couple of weeks ago. Related: I don't care about any of these people. [E!]
• "Fuming Barbra Streisand fans claim she rigged a 'cute pet competition.' so one of her friends could win priceless tickets to her upcoming Village Vanguard show." [Page Six]
• Burt Reynolds, who just went into rehab, is already out, it seems. [Reuters, Mirror]
• Jon Bon Jovi totally understands why former members of Nirvana are upset about Kurt Cobain's character in Guitar Hero 5 being able to play songs by other bands in the game. "I don't know that I would have wanted it either. To hear someone else's voice coming out of a cartoon version of me? I don't know. It sounds a little forced." [BBC News]
• "Paul McCartney topped a poll of Americans' favorite Beatles, but nearly a quarter of those surveyed said they didn't like the British rock group." [Reuters]
• Katie "Jordan" Price named her celebrity rapist on camera but "terrified" lawyers banned his identity from being broadcast. [The Sun]
• Q. After you dropped out of school at 16, you were a drummer in a punk rock band. What was that like? "It was a wild time. It involved a lot of drinking and fighting, but I'm not sure if I was being a punk rocker or just Scottish." — Craig Ferguson. [USA Today]
• "She looked like Rachel Zoe gone horribly wrong! It proves the point that you can judge a person by the company they keep- or don't keep. "It's painfully apparent that Jesus may be able to turn water into wine, but your basic blow dryer eludes him." — Madonna's brother, Christopher Ciccone, on his sister's look at the VMAs. [E!]
• Q. Did you really write the book's first chapter on your iPhone? "I actually did. I was amazed it had this little keyboard in it. I'm a techno-moron and it had this keyboard that spellchecked as you wrote. It was a good way to start writing the novel because I wasn't taking it seriously, I was just checking out my phone. The rest I wrote by hand." — Nick Cave on his second novel, The Death of Bunny Munro. [Time]
• "It's always so hard for me to describe a film I'm in, as it's so subjective. It's about a lot of different people living in Paris, and a mix of many sides of life, not all happy ones. If you don't go to the bottom, you don't know what joy is, and to explore life you have to plunge head first and take risks. And the way we're brought up with this whole view of life as black and white, good and bad, is completely false, because in life everything is transformable, and something bad can actually be very good, and vice versa. So it's about all those ideas." — Juliette Binoche on her new film, Paris. [Reuters]
• "Yeah. But I don't want to elaborate. I would never call myself a cutter. Girls go through different phases when they're growing up, when they're miserable and do different things, whether it's an eating disorder or they dabble in cutting… I never think I'm worthy of anything... I have a sick feeling of being mocked all the time. I have a lot of self-loathing." — Megan Fox to Rolling Stone, when asked if she had ever cut herself. [NY Daily News]
• "I made my wife appreciate it. She was a good sport. I paraded around. I loved my body. I walked around, danced — dancing with a belly like that was fun. My stepdaughter loved it, too. She kept poking me in the stomach, laughing." — Matt Damon on gaining 30 pounds for The Informant!. [USA Today]
• "Jennifer is one of the coolest women I've ever met. She's so smart." — Gerard Butler on Ms. Aniston. [MSNBC Scoop via Us Weekly]

Earlier: Crush Of The Day: Craig Ferguson

• Oh, snap: Paulina Porizkova has been given the pink slip by Tyra and America's Next Top Model! The '80s supermodel told Craig Ferguson on the Late, Late Show:

"Listen, do you know why I am in Los Angeles? Because I am looking for a job. Because I was fired by America's Next Top Model on my birthday." (PP's birthday was April 9.) She continued: "The reason I was told I was fired was because, it seemed, that America's Next Top Model has gotten too fat and they needed to cut some fat and the fat was me. So I figured it was either that or my gigantic huge ego. Which I wasn't aware of until I was told by the producers that I have an ego problem." Will Twiggy come back? Or will the show just have Ms. J, Nigel and Tyra as judges? [E!]

• Did George Clooney get smashed and puke at a party in Miami? A snitch says "He was drinking vodka and Patron, but it looked like he'd had enough," then he hurled in the VIP area. George says: "That never happened, although I was sitting next to someone who did throw up." Right, right. [Gatecrasher]
• Did Brad Pitt get wasted and drunk dial Jennier Aniston? A source says he called and told her he misses her and that he's sorry for any hurt caused." Right, right. [Gatecrasher]
• Someone tried to break into Lindsay Lohan's house yesterday. Cops thought maybe the house was ransacked, but, no, it was just messy. Who among us has not had a bedroom that looked like it was hit by burglars? I have been there. [TMZ]
• Whoops: Rihanna accidentally sent Chris Brown birthday presents! "One of Rihanna's assistants accidentally gave him an expensive pair of sneakers and a watch that Rihanna had bought before they broke up," a source tells Us Weekly. "She no longer wanted to send them." [MSNBC]
• Kate Winslet wears a ring given to her by Leonardo DiCaprio, and it's engraved inside. But she won't reveal what the text reads. One guess: "I'm cold, Rose." [Mirror]
• More on this in Midweek Madness, but Kate from Jon & Kate Plus 8 maybe "drew up a secret contract that allows Jon to have girlfriends on the side - as long as he stays on the show." [Star]
• Former Idol runner-up Clay Aiken has reached out to Adam Lambert, but apparently the Idol producers don't want Gayken anywhere near Glambert. [Chicago Sun-Times]
• Britney Spears' cousin and former assistant Alli Sims has a new single on iTunes, which she alerted her entire phone book about via text message. [Page Six]
• Since what every woman lives for is to be validated by men, Olivia Wilde must be thrilled that she is number one on the Maxim Hot 100 list. [USA Today]
• Wow! Jennifer Hudson looks gorgeous on the new cover of Essence. LOL at the number one sex secret: "Make Him Say Your Name." People! That is a Beyoncé song. [The Life files]
• Michael Jackson could take home more than $50 million from his 50-show stint at London's O2 Arena. [Reuters]
• Michael Jackson's tour is "shrouded in secrecy." A source says "here are some big things that will happen and amaze." [MSNBC]
• Nicole Kidman was supposed to star in a Woody Allen film with Josh Brolin and Naomi Watts, but has "bolted" from the project. [Variety]
• As seen in this 2008 video, Carrie Prejean was a lingerie model for E! [E!]
• Mark Ronson names his "essentials": Lagavulin whiskey; Duran Duran; the Sunday New York Times. Among others. [Men.Style.Com]
• Justin Timberlake's family adores Jessica Biel. [Page Six]
• A 50 Cent/Bette Midler duet would be epic. Amazing! In the meantime, you'll have to make do knowing that they garden together. Sorta. [E!]
• Drop everything and shed a single glistening tear: Chad Michael Murray is leaving One Tree Hill. Ditto Hilarie Burton. [E!]
• This Daily Fail story is about how Leona Lewis is lonely, homesick and gaining weight; based on a few photos. Charming. [Daily Mail]
• Depeche Mode's lead singer, Dave Gahan, is in the hospital in Athens, Greece for an undisclosed illness. Insert "Shake The Disease" or "Just Can't Get Enough" or "Personal Jesus" joke here. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Katie "Jordan" Price and Peter Andre constantly sniped at each other and she called him her "punch bag," so maybe it's best that they have split. [The Sun]
• This report claims that Katie "Jordan" Price was training for a marathon (?!?!) and refusing to fornicate, which is why "sex-starved" hubs Peter Andre wanted out. [The Sun]
• I called this, but here it is: "Katie Price's mystery man is gay equestrian star." [News.com.au]
• Kylie Minogue and her hot hottie boyfriend went to a photobooth where they acted "like a pair of lovestruck teenagers." Whee! [Daily Mail]
• Kid Rock is making an alcohol product called Bad Ass Beer. "It just tastes like good American light beer…an everyday beer," he says. "It's creating jobs in Michigan at the brewing company. We know people are hurting here so we're trying to take that whole approach." [LA Times]
• New day, same story: Trudie Styler, Rainforest Foundation founder, hired a private jet for the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Won't someone think of the epiphytes?!?!?! [Daily Mail]
• Anna Kournikova had so many demands related to a recent speaking engagement — chauffeur, first class plane tickets — that she is being called Costly Kournikova. [Daily Mail]
• This guy who "contributed script ideas" to Guy Ritchie's flick, RocknRolla, is on the "most wanted" list in London; he was involved in a demonstration against Israel's presence in Gaza and his Facebook (?!?!) states, "Muslim first before anything. And InshAllah I will die one…" [The Sun]
• Three words: Goonies cast reunion. [USA Today]
• Blind item! "Which self-branded wanna-be celeb was caught doing the walk of shame at11 a.m. - in her ball gown - after a recent gala in D.C.? [Gatecrasher]
• "It's very exciting and very different than the first one, which is the luxury of getting to do another one. We did the first one, and those were our pent-up things that we hadn't finished in the show, so now we're just starting fresh in a way, which is really, really exciting. It's just a new adventure." — Kristin Davis, on the Sex And The City sequel. [Mirror]
• "I've changed the destination of my wedding seven times." — Rachel Hunter. [Page Six]
• "Somebody told me these people are using it. I hate politics. I just want people to serve the people. I want governments, whichever government comes in, to be unbiased and say there should be justice in the country and that's my purpose in life." — Composer AR Rahman, who is upset that Indian political campaigns are using the song "Jai Hao." [Times Of India]
• "This is what I told the guys: The plan was I wanted to do the dance record, go on the tour, come home and get pregnant — since I'm a pro at it now because I did it before. I'll write the record while I'm pregnant, then after I have the baby, we'll go on tour and we'll have a new No Doubt record. It'll be amazing… It totally didn't work. I don't know how other women feel, but I lose connection with myself because my body becomes this other vessel for this other human, even after a few months, you don't have your body back, you're not yourself. I was feeling not very modern, not very creative." — Gwen Stefani, on working with No Doubt. [LA Times]
• "Lindsay is a good person to have watch over Ali right now. Lindsay can show Ali the ropes. Ali's out there working on her record and singing career." — Dina Lohan. [MSNBC]
• "I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER... WHY WOULD I USE TWITTER??? I ONLY BLOG 5 PERCENT OF WHAT I'M UP TO IN THE FIRST PLACE. I'M ACTUALLY SLOW DELIVERING CONTENT BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY ACTUALLY BUSY BEING CREATIVE MOST OF THE TIME AND IF I'M NOT AND I'M JUST LAYING ON A BEACH I WOULDN'T TELL THE WORLD. EVERYTHING THAT TWITTER OFFERS I NEED LESS OF. THE PEOPLE AT TWITTER KNOW I DON'T HAVE A FUCKING TWITTER SO FOR THEM TO ALLOW SOMEONE TO POSE AS ME AND ACCUMULATE OVER A MILLION NAMES IS IRRESPONSIBLE AND DECEITFUL TO THERE FAITHFUL USERS. REPEAT... THE HEADS OF TWITTER KNEW I DIDN'T HAVE A TWITTER AND THEY HAVE TO KNOW WHICH ACCOUNTS HAVE HIGH ACTIVITY ON THEM. IT'S A FUCKING FARCE AND IT MAKES ME QUESTION WHAT OTHER SO CALLED CELEBRITY TWITTERS ARE ACTUALLY REAL OR FAKE. HEY TWITTER, TAKE THE SO CALLED KANYE WEST TWITTER DOWN NOW .... WHY? ... BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD!!!!!!!!!" — Your friend, Kanye West. [DListed]

…vehicle size, that is. (McConaughey's got Airstream trailers: a "28-footer" and a "35-footer.") Things quickly escalate, and they next thing you know, Ford trucks, airplanes, blenders and Iron Chef are involved.

Apparently at some point, Craig told Shirley that Paul McCartney looks like Angela Lansbury and, as seen on last night's Late Show With Craig Ferguson, Shirley simply can't get it out of her head. Clip at left.


Earlier: Tom Selleck Makes Shirley Manson Blush

The answer, of course, is "no"... or is it? Judging by the color of the former Secretary of State's face after Ferguson posed the question, we're not so sure. Clip at left.

Craig and Shirley went on to crack each other up; she clearly spilled the beans about his Friday show being pre-taped on Thursday. Also: I wanted to write something like "make that scotch a double," since they're both from Scotland and their accents are so awesome. But anyway: Clip at left.

Wanda was her usual witty self, cracking jokes and asking the newly-hitched Craig "are they trying to overturn your marriage?" as a way of transitioning into a brief discussion of same-sex marriage. Craig replies that "just to be safe, I got married in Vermont... I married someone from the other side," to which Wanda says: "Ohh, you went old school." Wanda, who got married in California, wonders why people don't focus on breaking up their own marriages rather than threatening hers. She points out that gay marriage could potentially solve our economic crisis by pouring much-needed dollars into the wedding industry: "especially with men, we're talking like millions of dollars in ice sculptures alone!" Clip above.

• It's going to be Kate Winslet vs. Kate Winslet at the Bafta awards. [Guardian]
• And! Winslet is on the February cover of In Style. [The Life Files]

• The Oscar presenters are a secret, but no one cares. [NY Daily News]
• Ruh-roh: Justin Timberlake was having dinner with Jessica Biel when Britney and her mom walked into the restaurant. A spy says JT and Jess quickly slumped down in their chairs to avoid Brit Brit. [Gatecrasher]
• Patrick Swayze and his wife Lisa are "each other's rocks." [People]
• Random celebs are going to the inauguration! Josh Lucas will attend the swearing-in ceremony, Kal Penn has a ticket, Gloria Reuben is going to the Creative Coalition's pre-inaugural bash, and Ashley Judd is going to a couple of balls and the swearing-in. Of course, Judd will swing through Sundance first. Stars! Just like us. Not. [USA Today]
• And yes, Will Smith will be there too, as an "eyewitness to history." [Telegraph]
• Want to know what Barack Obama will eat for dinner on January 19th, before he takes the oath of office the next day? Click away. [TMZ]
• The new Barack Obama wax figure is vaguely horrifying. [Concrete Loop]
• Oh dear: Mickey Rourke and Bai Ling made out at Chateau Marmont. [Page Six]
• Breaking: Naomi Campbell and Naomi Campbell's maid have settled their lawsuit. Raise your hand if you think the maid got paid. [AP]
• Lost fans! Foxy Matthew Fox is looking foxy on the cover of Details! [ONTD]
• Lost fans! Awesome Evangeline Lilly is on the cover of TV Guide! [JustJared]
• Whoa: Guy Ritchie was in Madonna's NYC apartment on Tuesday, because Lourdes begged them, "Please don’t be mean to each other." Now, says a source: "Madge and Guy are getting along better than they have in over a year." Absence makes the heart grow civil? [Gatecrasher]
• Madonna is flying to Florida for an equestrian festival, and she's having a British riding instructor flown out for her. Six months ago Madonna had a horse shipped to the U.S., how did we miss that? [Perez]
• Amy Winehouse has extended her "well-being" stay at Le Sport Spa in St. Lucia, but she is ignoring the booze ban her management put in place. A source says, "We keep catching her crawling past bars, or hiding behind chairs. She grabs guests’ drinks and runs off, like a squirrel with a nut." [MSNBC]
• Okay, even though this is a picture of Amy Winehouse on her hands and knees outside of a hotel bar, her spokesperson says: "Amy was not stealing drinks off people's tables. She could have been doing anything in those pictures. She is moving out of the hotel and into a private villa nearby. She wants a bit more privacy. Her dad arrived today and she has decided to stay out there for two more weeks. She is just on holiday and enjoying herself." Clearly. [Daily Mail]
• American Idol's Kara DioGuardi is defending her attack on the contestant known as Bikini Girl. It isn't that she has a problem with attractive women: "I love pretty girls," DioGuardi told Ryan Seacrest on his radio show. "The thing with Bikini Girl, to be honest with you — I think she had a better body than her face. But we wouldn’t be talking about the bikini if she killed the song." [MSNBC]
• In this behind-the-scenes video of Beyoncé and Solange's L'Oréal commercial, you find out that they each think the other one looks "beautiful and flawless." Oh, and there's hair choreography. [ONTD]
• This item is about how Daniel Craig admits he's done some "crap" films, and used to go in Blockbuster and throw his bad movies that were on the shelf under the counter. Which is the story he told Jon Stewart on The Daily Show, and we posted that clip here. [The Sun]
• We've heard this before, but Whoopi Goldberg is returning to the sci-fi genre: She'll produce and star in Stream, a series which premieres today on horror website and on-demand network FEARnet. [Reuters]
• Filmmaker Michael Moore "misused" a war photograph — in which a U.S. soldier is seen cradling a wounded Iraqi girl — and now there is a lawsuit and a kerfluffle. [Page Six]
• Will Ferrell is learning you can't say "douchebag" on morning television. [Page Six]
• Sharon Osbourne won't go on Jay Leno's new prime-time show in September: "I wouldn't go on it. Fuck no. He had always been a friend of ours, but then Ozzy went and performed on Jimmy Kimmel, and Jay has banned us ever since. So fuck him!" Tell us how you really feel, Sharon. [Page Six]
• By the by, Sharon has just won an apology and cold hard cash from The Sun after the paper falsely accused her of overworking husband Ozzy. [AP]
• Even though Courtenay Semel beat up Casey Johnson and set her hair on fire, the two will go to Sundance together this weekend. Fun! [Page Six]
• Emily Blunt is in negotiations to play femme fatale Black Widow in Iron Man 2. [Variety]
• Kendra Wilkinson says: "Now I'm totally against [Hefner's] way of life, with three girlfriends and all of that." But! She will marry fiancé Hank Baskett at the Playboy Mansion this summer. Moral compass: Askew. [NY Daily News]
• Aww, Lenny Kravitz and daughter Zoe work out with a trainer together in Miami. [Page Six]
• For some reason Craig Ferguson is really protective of Jimmy Fallon, who will take over Late Night in March. Ferguson told a bunch of TV critics: "I challenge you all to this: Give Jimmy a month before you review him. [Fallon] is kind of like the reverse Barack Obama. It's like he hasn't done anything yet, but everybody is commenting on his performance. Give him a chance." [AP]
• Jude Law and Judi Dench are helping save a gorgeous old Victorian church in north London. [Telegraph]
• Blind item! "Which aging action star had a leisurely conversation with a young, hunky co-star on set — all while being pleasured by an extra?" [Gatecrasher]
• Joey McIntyre says of the New Kids On The Block cruise: "Our manager tells us this is not a cheesy thing." But honey, he gets paid to say that. [Gatecrasher]
• Emma "Baby Spice Bunton" says there will be no Spice Girls reunion: "We had the most amazing time. It was a completely different vibe and we had so much fun. But it's done now, and I think we're all going in different directions." Ya think? [Mirror]
• Blur guitarist Graham Coxon says Pete Doherty is a "scumbag magnet." [The Sun]
• Daniel Radcliffe had to change a line in the play Equus because American tourists were laughing. It had to do with someone asking a horse's name and the line "Trojan... and you can stroke him." [Telegraph]
• "Are you sure you want to get this close to me after seeing my show?" — Bret Michaels to a group of "busty, flirty" fans who approached him begging for photos at a NYC bar on Monday. [Gatecrasher]
• "People come up to me and have certain words for me, but you know what I do? I say, 'I'm healthy, I exercise, I believe in myself, and I think I’m beautiful.' You just have to learn how to transform the pressures into something that doesn’t soak into you on a personal level. You see it, you breathe past it, you don’t let it sink into your self-esteem." — Raven-Symoné, who battles body critics, but will host a Dove-sponsored self-esteem workshop today. [People]
• "Honestly, to see how in love with Angelina he is, it was really quite disgusting. Awful in fact. It's in my contract now: I won't ever work with him again." — Cate Blanchett, joking about Brad Pitt. [Telegraph]
• "I got a souvenir. I got his glasses as a present. And it's my treasure. I love those glasses. He only has two pairs and he gave me one." — Penelope Cruz, on what Woody Allen gave her after Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Bet he says that to all the girls. [Hindustan Times via Contact Music]

In the clip at left, Ferguson talks with Sedaris about the benefits of "Vitamin P," why it's more fun to be a '50s housewife without a husband, and how seeing his sister's Barbies naked was bad preparation for seeing a real naked woman.