• Apparently emboldened by last week's success in Milan, Bruno — aka Sacha Baron Cohen — crashed Stella McCartney today. "With his red thong clearly visible above his jeans, the comedian — who was virtually unrecognisable in a flamboyant leather gilet, with his slicked-down hair dyed blonde and brown — sucked Tampax, clapped along to the music and generally disgruntled the front row by continually pushing aside those sitting in front of him for a better look at the models." He then delivered a "lone standing ovation." [VogueUK]
• In total radness: DVF to design a comic book in connection with her Wonder Woman-inspired collection. Really hoping she has to make the rounds of the comics conventions. [Fashionista]
• Chloe Sevigny gets into menswear. Well, Gallo will wear it. [Nylon]

• Andre Benjamin's clothing line is for the modern fop. "To create a persona for his fashion line, Mr. Benjamin combined his surname with that of Bill Bixby. The character is a world traveler whose wardrobe includes things like a $995 cotton corduroy blazer, a $350 felted waistcoat and a $95 newsboy cap." [NY Times]
• Whoever wears that will surely be the intended demographic for "J. Crew's first book." "Written by Max Blagg and illustrated by Hugo Guinness, What a Man Should Know is a collection of 50 (very) whimsical tips for the modern male. So what should you know? Chess, wine, and figure-drawing." [Men.Style]
• Some people claimed Heidi stole the Project Runway premise — aka the same setup every single competition reality show has ever had ever. A judge, not surprisingly, dismissed it. [wwltv]
• Michelle Obama sports H&M on the campaign trail. [BlackBook]
• Lagerfeld video. Nuff said. [NY Mag]
• Scary Spice Mel B wants a Project Runway-style reality show. Get in line, kid. [E]
• Rather than going bargain basement, Target courts recessionistas. [Business Week]
• More on Miss Sixty's woes. [BBC]
• Sorta It-Girl Cory Kennedy to replace Kinda It-Girl Daisy Lowe as the face of Docs. [Fashionista]
• Levi's tries way, way too hard: "The San Francisco company has launched a new viral effort it hopes will attract young men to pass along videos of customized "beasts" emerging from the button-fly of Levi's jeans. At Unbuttonyourbeast.com, visitors can choose from nine different animated characters with names like Trout Troutman, Paul the Pincher and Sock Nasty, then customize the beast's message by calling a toll-free number. The effort, unsurprisingly, is geared to young men just out of college." The emails are titled, "Do you dare to unbutton my beast?" [AdWeek]
• India eases the way for the burgeoning luxury market. [IHT]
• Guy Ritchie's first hit since hooking up with Madge: a Nike ad gets big on YouTube. [Telegraph]
• Naomi Campbell's gonna walk for Hermes; everybody flips out. [Fashion Week Daily]
• I wish these celebs would stop calling their mix tapes "albums." Anyhoo, Heatherette designer Richie Rich's, "Celebutante," is about to drop. [Fashionista]
• "If there were a gold medal for marathon modeling, Shalom Harlow would surely win it for the Viktor & Rolf fashion film that will begin today on the Dutch duo’s Web site. 'It was like the fashion Olympics,' said Rolf Snoeren, who, with Viktor Horsting, reenacted a high-tech version of 'Funny Face' to showcase their spring collection. 'It was 14 hours a day on high heels, but she was a champion.'” [WWD]
• 80's power shoulders are big (sorry) on the Paris runways. [WSJ]
• That gold statue of Kate Moss was just unveiled. [Mirror]
• UGGS are like cockroaches: all that will be left after a nuclear holocaust. While everything else is foundering, UGGs is way up! [WSJ]
• The Lauren Conrad line forlorn and unbought. [Page Six]
• Bossy new bikini has "decorative beads" that change color when UV rays grow dangerously high. [Telegraph]
• Screw Jimmy Choos. Cheap shoes make more sense for actual walking. [Daily News]
• "Margherita Missoni, meanwhile, has experienced some teasing for wearing vintage sparkling Harper’s Bazaar frames — due to an eye problem. 'Suzy Menkes says it’s my Sarah Palin look,' she laughed. 'It is definitely not inspired by her.'" [WWD]

(All images via Bauer-Griffin.)

• Holy underminer, Batman! Whitney Port on her clothing line: "I'm developing a clothing line. It won't be like Lauren's stuff, which I loved. Mine will be a little more high-end." [Radar]
• "Fashion Victims: The Catty Catalogue of Stylish Casualties From A to Z" by Michael Roberts, fashion director of Vanity Fair, sounds like it will be fascinating to the fashionistas he skewers and completely stultifying to everyone else. "Roberts has written a poem for each letter of the alphabet, for instance P for "photographer": "Why am I so fabulous? What makes me truly great? What would life be without me? It's hard to contemplate . . . No billboards straddling city streets with body parts gigantic/Nor me with glass in premiere class crisscrossing the Atlantic." The accompanying illustration is a caricature of Mario Testino. " Sounds like a gas. [NY Post]
• Early estimates place the price of Cindy McCain's RNC outfit at $300,000. Well, in fairness $280,000 goes towards her three-karat diamond earrings. [US News]

• We love how thoughtfully celebrities consider the challenges of starting a small business! Jamie-Lynn Sigler on her new jewelry line: “We just started beading these gold bracelets with all different types of gold one day and started playing with different charms, and we thought, Hey, let’s do it,” [NY Mag]
• Word on the street is that Cole Mahr, the dude who wore a dress in the Marc Jacobs print ads, will be doing it again on the runway. Does this bode well for Isis?! [Fashionista]
• Lancome adds Dominican model Arlenis Sosa to its "stable." Says Lancome's prez, “Arlenis possesses beauty, intelligence, charm and compassion...All of our brand ambassadors share these attributes, so we knew she would be a wonderful addition. We are very proud to welcome her to the Lancôme family.” [WWD]
• You'll be relieved to know that Fashion Week is civic-minded. A fashion week press release tells us, "In the spirit of the election season and theme at this year’s Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week, unique, fashion inspired election slogan pins will be given out in small quantities each day. Fashionistas can vote for their favorite slogan at www.votembfashionweek.com."
• "Furrier to the stars" Dennis Basso owes the IRS. "The baritone-voiced minkmeister is singing the blues now that the feds have imposed a $200,000 lien on his swanky Central Park West apartment, according to public records." Basso says it's all a misunderstanding because his "accountant's mother had a heart attack." [NY Post]
• ANTM judge and "top fashion photographer" Nigel Barker and his wife are having a baby girl. "We found out it’s going to be a little girl," Barker, 36, told Us Thursday at the Saks Fifth Avenue Ruby Slippers Collection party in NYC. "We’re going to look at her, and when we see her, we’re going to come up with a name." They already have a 2-year-old son. [US Weekly]
• Men's Heath EIC and titanic douche David Zinczenko is psyched about the new Women's Health. Quoth he, "We've pulled into the passing lane, and we're poised to surpass a lot of women's magazines now. We can see Glamour just up ahead. There are a lot of opportunities for Women's Health because of the size of the market." [WWD]
• We wouldn't normally think much of the fact that AOL is relaunching its style and beauty site, StyleList.com, except that they've tapped Carmindy as their beauty expert, and we love What Not to Wear. [WWD]
• A Saks Fifth Avenue employee has been charged with $680K in theft. [NY Post]
• Wait, has Rachel Bilson been on any worst-dressed lists? “I think it’s cool to be on the worst-dressed list,” she says. “If people aren’t accepting, that’s OK. Bring it on, I don’t care!” [People]
• Fern Mallis basically runs Fashion Week. Here's why she's psyched: "First of all, September shows always feel like school is starting. This particular season there's different kind of buzz in the air, especially with the elections. We are all wondering how the outcome will affect our industry, especially with two first ladies who wear clothes particularly well." [Huffington Post]
• Behold fall's least flattering fashion trend: the pegged trouser. "They usually have two front pleats at the waistband that are designed to add volume in the hip area, then balloon out in the thigh before tapering in again at the ankle. They can also be cropped on the ankle and high-waisted. Admittedly, they sound alarm bells for most of us - extra volume around the thighs is always a hard sell." Thanks a lot, YSL! [The Guardian]
• Speaking of the 90s: LA Gear is back, baby! In what The Cut describes as the requisite "in Saved by the Bell shapes and neon colors." [The Cut]
• Italian designer Mila Schon has died at 92. [Reuters]
• Kate Betts, Joel Stein and Isaac Mizrahi will all be blogging fashion week for Style & Design. Says Betts, "I wanted to offer readers the same kind of inside, up-to-the-minute, offbeat look at fashion week as opposed to straightforward reviews...Joel and Isaac, I hope, will add a lot of humor." [WWD]
• Model Lily Cole is leaving modeling to pursue acting, was inspired by Heath Ledger. But more to the point, she's starting Cambridge, where she'll be studying history! Says the 20-year-old, "modelling can get a little lonely sometimes, especially when you are travelling on your own. That's what I'm looking forward to about going to university to meet lots of new people." [Telegraph]
• Not profiting by Lily Cole's example, former internet phenom/partygirl and wannabe-Lezark Cory Kennedy has been signed to One Model Management. [Fashionista]
• Domino really understands the needs of its readers; they've done the important work of making a "fashion week survival guide." "The survival guide includes recommendations from designers, editors and fashion insiders, including Francisco Costa, Bloomingdale's fashion director Stephanie Solomon, Simon Doonan, Anya Hindmarch, Vera Wang, Lela Rose and Peter Som. Musings include recommendations on what to do for an hour in between shows — Humberto Leon, from Opening Ceremony, suggested Wu Lim Qi Gong Master Massage." [WWD]
• Raise your hand if you want the new KISS Vans! Wait...no one? "To celebrate that fateful day in 1978 when all four members of the band released solo albums, the skatewear brand (and main sponsor of the Warped Tour) is releasing the Vans x Kiss Sk8-Hi commemorative T-shirt and shoe pack sometime in the "late fall" of this year." [AdAge]
• As previously reported, designer Heather Thomson has tapped New York's pool of exotic dancing talent for her upcoming lingerie show. "She held a competition of dancers who perform gymnastics-like routines on brass poles at some of Manhattan's poshest strip clubs and picked eight to model her Yummie Tummie Shapewear." [Reuters]
• The Rag&Bone designers are refreshingly enthusiastic! "We are big fans of Radiohead. Actually, seeing them perform at Glastonbury head-to-toe in Rag & Bone would be pretty magic." [Fashion Week Daily]
• In addition to a ludicrous rock-themed fashion mag and a fashion-themed rock concert, Fashion Rocks sponsors a charity auction. "Among the items up for auction: A leather jacket autographed by Keith Urban and seats at Kimora Lee Simmons and Diane Von Furstenberg's coveted runway shows." [People]
• We love Daphne Guinness largely because of her connection to the Mitfords, but on any terms her upcoming shoot for Vogue Italia sounds rad! [Fashionista]

• L.A. boutique Kitson can't give away poor Lauren Conrad's collection. Well, they can, but not to customers. "They're giving away her collection to Caitlin's Closet, a charity that gives girls dresses for their big events, like the prom and homecoming." I have a terrible image of no one choosing her dresses for prom, though — I mean, they have other options, right? [TMZ]
• Designer Maria Pinto's star has risen along with client Michelle Obama's. 'While she does point out things Mrs. Obama might like, Ms. Pinto said she has never dressed her for events. Of the purple dress worn the night Mr. Obama claimed the nomination, Ms. Pinto said it was not planned. “Michelle is not scheming like her wardrobe should make certain points.”' [NY Times]
• In a match made in pink, Upper East Side, Gossip-Girly heaven, Charlotte Ronson and Shoshonna Lonstein team up for beachwear. "The two, who attended high school together at the The Nightingale-Bamford School, have joined forces on a beach line called Made With Love. Launching at retail in February, the collection includes printed women’s and girls’ bathing suits — a one-piece and several bikini styles — and matching printed beach towels and cover-ups." [WWD]

• Anti-fur activists would really prefer the pope not wear this one ceremonial hat trimmed in ermine. Cause that's obviously the archaic church tradition the pope really needs to address first. I'm not saying this one 13th century cap isn't going to start an international run on ermines, but still... [MSNBC]
• More on fashion week not requiring models to be healthy: "Hilary Riva, chief executive officer of the British Fashion Council, said in an open letter Wednesday that a yearlong model health inquiry deems certificates "an unworkable solution." "From our conversations with our international counterparts in New York, Milan and Paris, it has become clear that they do not recognize the need for an international health certificate," Riva wrote. [WWD]
• Maybe she's born with it? "Maybelline will give out $10,000 grants to 10 people who have changed lives through education. Post your nominee at maybelline.com." [NY Daily News]
• An event I secretly really, really want to go to: "Gamorama, Macy's annual glitzfest to benefit children's cancer research, will be all about the '80s Friday night, featuring Cyndi Lauper and MC Hammer." Have already put in a request for "I Had The Time of My Life." Although not, actually, invited. [Star Tribune]
• Helped by weak buck, Estee Lauder is way up. [Reuters]
• In its desperate resuscitation efforts, Liz Claiborne gives the unceremonious boot to striped-tights staple Sigrid Olsen. "It is a curious development in the fickle business of fashion that clothing labels like Ms. Olsen’s, made by and for the baby boomer generation, are among those being hardest hit by the current economic turmoil and retail< retrenchment." [NY Times]
• Skechers desperate to acquire Heelys! "After Wednesday's close, Skechers said it would pay nearly $143 million, or $5.25 a share in cash, for each share of Heelys. Skechers said the offer would give Heelys' stockholders an 8.2% premium to the closing price of the company's shares on Aug. 12." [The Street]
• New High School Musical panties deemed inappropriate for children? "The underwear, for girls as young as seven, are to promote the popular Disney film High School Musical and have "Dive In" written on the front. The phrase is a reference to a scene in film where characters dive into a swimming pool. But the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC) and the National Union of Teachers (NUT) have both criticized the underwear, describing it as "inappropriate"." [Telegraph]
• Trying to smarten up their image, Sears unveils Fashion Week exhibit. '"What we really wanted to do was bring a taste of Fashion Week to people who would normally never get to sit under the tents or get to see a runway show," said Sears spokeswoman Amy Dimond. The retailer will also hold an exclusive kick-off party meant to get those in attendance, like fashion industry executives, to look "at Sears in a way that people may have not in the past." she said. [Reuters]
• Buyer and showroom head Cynthia O'Connor may be "the smartest woman in fashion" according to BlackBook. “COC + Co builds brands because we have a long-term strategy, not a ‘sell it today and collect your check’ philosophy.” O’Connor loves it just so. “When people walk in, they can see the success and that validates the experience.” [BlackBook]
• Asos.com CEO says they're gonna be "the amazon.com of the fashion industry. "As well as constantly evolving the mix of brands stocked, the etailer is implementing a range of initiatives - from the launch of a marketplace for second-hand clothes to homepages tailored for customers - to stay one step ahead of its increasingly-growing band of competitors." [VogueUK]
• "An ex-hasidic fashion designer uses Jewish symbolism in his designs, offending many devout Jews." I'm more offended by the designs themselves, not to be flippant. [Reuters]
• Without any irony: you can now buy Ralph Lauren Polo from your phone. "Taking its philosophy of “merchan-tainment” to a new level, Polo Ralph Lauren is launching into mobile commerce — m-commerce — incorporating echnology that allows shoppers to buy Polo merchandise from their cell phones." [WWD]

• Cory Kennedy speaks! About Lindsay Lohan and friendgirl Samantha Ronson! "Lindsay just feels safe with her," Cory says. "I just feel like they have a very loyal and trustworthy relationship, which is really hard to come across in the world that Lindsay's in. It's a trust thing." [People]
• Lindsay is looking to settle a lawsuit brought against her by David Kim, who claims LL owes him $55,000 from when he was in her security detail. LL says she doesn't know him and never employed him. Maybe she was drunk and high at the time? [E!]
• Christina Aguilera is unapologetic about her partying: "I spend all day with my son," she says. "Once in a while, if I want to go out and have a mommy-daddy night with my husband, I am more than allowed to do that." You tell 'em, girl. [People]
• Oh! And Xtina wants you to vote in November. That is why she and her son Max are in a new commercial; Max is swaddled in an American flag. Is that kosher? [The Sun]
• A photographer accused of stalking Britney's pregnant little sister, Jamie Lynn, was arrested in Mississippi on Tuesday after the Spears family filed a complaint, claiming he wouldn't leave them alone. The pap says he was 200 feet away and not bothering JLS. [E!]
• The "first sighting of Halle Berry's baby" is a grainy video from an alley where Halle was leaving a photo shoot. All you see is a covered carrier. [E! via Hollywood.tv]

• In the R. Kelly trial, seven family members of the alleged victim have testified. Four witnesses say that they recognize the woman in the video; three say they do not. One relative says "It definitely wasn't her." [USA Today]
• So you know how Entertainment Tonight aired a story about Angelina Jolie giving birth? Apparently they were repeatedly told that the information was from someone impersonating Angie's assistant. And they reported it anyway. The show has not mentioned the babies on air since the initial report, and the story has been deleted from its web site. [Yahoo News]
• JK Rowling is suing the publisher of the London Star Map, since it shows her residence and instructions on how to get there. Rowling considers this a "a gross invasion of privacy." [Perez Hilton]
• "I'm euphoric, I've been doing the happy dance all day. I'm so proud of Barack and Michelle Obama and what this means for all of us…the new possibilities for our country. And if he wants me to, I'm ready to go door to door." — Oprah. [ET]
• As seen in this photo, Jay-Z is also pretty freakin' psyched about Obama's nominaton. [Concrete Loop]
• Bridget Moynahan recalls being heartbroken and knocked up: "When you're suddenly pregnant and no one is standing by your side, even if you're in your 30s, it's a hard conversation. I'm a traditional girl, and I believe in marriage, and I just always thought that's the way I'd be doing this," she says. She also says Will Smith helped her. Yeah. Will Smith. [People]
• After suffering a heart attack on Saturday, Kelsey Grammer has been released from the hospital. Take care of that ticker! [People]
• Prospective jurors in New York got a speech from a clerk about movie stars, mayors and judges who've done their civic duty. The clerk mentioned how he gave the same talk to the jury pool for the Uma Thurman stalker trial. In the front row during this diatribe? Ethan Hawke. [Page Six]
• Sharon Stone: Banned from the Shanghai International Film Festival. [Page Six]
• She has apologized again for her remarks about karma, earthquakes and China, poor thing. [People]
• Brad Pitt dropped a ton of cash on furniture at the Design Miami Basel fair in Switzerland: a hollow white marble rococo-style table set him back $293,000. [Page Six]
• Um, on the of the lamps Brad bought looks like a dude holding hands with two kids, and is sorta creepy. [E!]
• Brad's spent $50,000 on art alone. [Us]
• Michelle Trachtenberg beat Snoop Dogg in a celebrity drag race. Snoop says: "If there was police on my ass, I would have beat you all!" [Rush & Molloy]
• There was a party being thrown last night in the building where Heath Ledger died: It was moved to another location, but Eva Mendes didn't get the memo. [TMZ]
• When Mark Ronson was a kid, he fell out of his bunkbed at camp. [Page Six]
• Johnny Rotten allegedly punched his assistant in the face. So punk rock. [TMZ]
• As mentioned in Midweek Madness, the cover of Star magazine uses a month-old picture to illustrate Angelina's "collapse." [TMZ]
• Kate Beckinsale says it's okay if her nine-year-old daughter Lily dates Brooklyn Beckham. When she's older. [Mirror]
• Beyoncé's little sister, Solange Knowles, broke her foot due to an onstage mechanical mishap during a concert. A large piece of metal fell on her foot. Solange kept singing (in extreme pain) and went to the hospital when she was done. The show must go on! [E!]
• Kenny Chesney is not engaged. Or planning on getting married. Star magazine reported he was maybe gonna tie the knot with his old girlfriend Allison Stewart. He tells People: "I enjoy being a bachelor. I enjoy everything that comes along with it." Yeah, yeah, who cares, right? [People]
• No! Rock band Yes has canceled its upcoming 40th anniversary tour. [Reuters]
• "It all happened suddenly. I wasn't expecting someone so funny, so full of life… I was seduced by his physique and his intelligence. He has five or six brains which are remarkably irrigated." —Carla Bruni on French prez Nicolas Sarkozy in her new book, Carla and Nicolas, The True Story. [Page Six]

Which, you know, sounds like totally understandable behavior, except that Cory is the one who is fucking seventeen years old, and Leigh is 23, and her Myspace headline reads "None of it would happen to me again. I'd seen through it. I elected to grow up." (Boldface ours!) And hummus is made from chickpeas, and eating food could probably do Leigh some good. (Also: having actual fun.) Anyway, we're pretty sure some sort of detente has been reached, since the Misshapes are taking their act to LA and Cory's whole crowd showed up at the last Misshapes, but the gossip was too good (i.e. depressing) not to share. For the record we are Cory partisans, because, duh.

We were recently racking our brains for the word for Yasser Arafat's headdress thingy when we found ourselves reading a post about a French magazine putting Internet It-Girl Cory Kennedy on its cover. We have been following the "career" of Cobrasnake muse and sometime girlfriend Cory for over a year and a half now and we're pretty sure that's why we have no fucking clue who's running Israel or Palestine (or what we're even supposed to call Palestine? Is it still the PLO? What did ) anymore. But the point is that something about the combination of Jazzercize chic and Middle Eastern headdresses and suddenly we had an "epiphany": Arden Wohl, the Vogue profile subject and profound filmmaker and pothead socialite whose "career" we also wished we didn't know about is just the Uptown, Manny-reading answer to Cory. And that's when we realized we needed an intervention! Please! Erase them! One of them, at least! After the jump, a poll. And also, Wikipedia's answer to what's up in the Mideast.

Oh yeah, Ehud Olmert. We knew that. Sort of. But we didn't know his political party, which is "Kadima," which we'd never even heard of, and OMG WE'RE GOING TO ISRAEL NEXT WEEK FOR A WEDDING. Shoot us. Palestine's a lot trickier, and maybe disputed? Salam Fayyad is apparently the new Prime Minister, as of six weeks ago. So glad we took this job! Anyway, onto what really matters.

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With whom we wouldn't have so much of a problem if it seemed like they knew how to have fun WITHOUT the fanatic documentation of party photographers? Well-trodden territory, we are aware, but like the meaning of life, we're still working it out. Thoughts, sage commenters?

Red Carpet Or Rehab, It Sells [NY Times]