Jezebel 
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New York, 1:58 PM
Thu Dec 10
68 posts in the last 24 hours
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10/01/09
In much of the world, salons aren't just somewhere you go to get your hair cut and then get out. They're social institutions, and they serve as psychological and physical safe spaces for women to bond and share their problems over beauty rituals that have specific cultural significance.
In Eastern Europe and most of the developing world, most salon services, from hair braiding to waxing to permanent makeup, are cheap enough to be acessible to even poor women. This is because they aren't actually seen as "luxuries" but rather necessities.
And yeah, looking good can be an act of resistance, of defiance, for women in deeply troubled societies.
During the siege of Sarajevo, Sarajevan women spent even more time than normal on their appearances, going out of their way --sometimes putting themselves in even more physical danger-- to look good.
I once asked a friend why this was and she said, matter-of-factly, "When I walked out my front door to go to school, I knew I might be living my last day. There was a strong possibility how I looked in the morning would be how people remembered me, the final image of me as a living person. Because of that, I made sure I looked my best."
10/01/09
Having a "chocolate facial" doesn't sound very hygenic.
Makeup is actually a very dirty thing to put on your face. Sure it makes you look pretty, but it's a huge cause in acne and the compounding of grease on a person's face.
I don't like the idea of teaching our kids that you need to wear make up to feel good about yourself.
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10/01/09
I think it's just little girls wanting to feel adult and "do what mommy does." But it seems absurd to spend a lot of money on it, when you could play dress-up and beauty shop at home.
10/01/09
One of my favorite bonding experiences with my mom was our mini salon dates together where we'd pretend our dining room was a salon and we'd primp.
As much as I'm a fan of bringing things into the public sphere as a means of creating a community, those moments at home playing pretend with my mom wouldn't have been as special if they were shared in a distinctly non-pretend non-magical place with tens of other little girls.
10/01/09
10/01/09
I have my days where I feel vulnerable without my "armour" on, but really nothing feels good like a swish of black liquid liner, coats of mascara and a bright gloss can make me feel.
Yesterday my "best friend" actually argued with me saying I was wearing full on makeup when we went out for coffee; but I was only wearing eyeliner and mascara and whatever blush hadn't faded from that morning. :/
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10/01/09
I often dress with more precision when I'm feeling stressed or anxious. It's not about looking more attractive to men--though this is probably a side effect--it's about taking control of my self-presentation. Wearing something tailored or fitted, straightening my hair, taking pains to match every piece (down to my underwear), means I *know* what people see when they look at me, even if what they're seeing is no more important than a lack of frizz. It's a small power in a big world.
10/01/09
On an unrelated & probably irrelevant note, every time I go to a Lebanese restaurant the waiters flirt with me and give me free dessert. This doesn't happen everywhere. I'm kind of a grungey, drag-y, punked out looking girl, but I clean up a little when I go out. Is it just a coincidence or something cultural?
10/01/09
I actually don't have a problem with things like beauty salon visits and manicures for little girls, as long as it's presented as a fun treat and not something that is essential to life as a woman.
10/01/09
The idea of children and hot wax scares the hell out of me, children's skin is much more delicate.
Dressing up and putting on makeup is fun, but should be just a treat.
10/01/09
10/01/09
Today she gets upset with me if I leave the house with a chipped manicure or with messy hair. It frustrates me. But at the same time, I can see things from her eyes -- that the same things she spent her whole life craving and not being able to have, I'm rejecting.
I think it goes both ways. Beauty rituals can be empowering. They can be armor (I think back to an article about women in Taliban-controlled Kabul wearing the darkest red nail polish they could find, and the strappiest shoes beneath their burkas) but they can also be unhealthy and they can also be meaningless.
At the end of the day, it's hard to judge others without understanding where they're coming from. Where's the line between pride in appearance and narcissism? Between enjoyment of food and gluttony?
10/01/09