• Sometimes the morning brings good news: Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana are going to play Italian priests in the movie version of Nine, which was inspired by Fellini's 8 1/2. Priests! [Elle UK]

• And here's the bad news: The U.S. Department of Labor reports job losses of nearly 10,000 in the apparel and textile sector for January alone. Departent stores cut nearly 9,000 positions the same month. [WWD]
• Luxury conglomerate It Holding SpA, which owns the labels Gianfranco Ferre and Malo, may go into bankruptcy. The Italian stock exchange has suspended trade of its stock indefinitely. [WSJ]
• Residents of San Francisco's Mission district — kind of like the Williamsburg of the west — successfully fought a proposed American Apparel using the city's stringent permit requirement laws for chain stores. The idea of hundreds of American Apparel-clad hipsters arguing the finer points of locally-owned commerce to the planning commission is a little wacky but sweet. [SF Gate]
• Meanwhile, spunky Badgers influenced the University of Wisconsin to let its contract with Russell Apparel, owner of the Russell Athletic brand, lapse following reports of anti-union activity by the company in Honduras. [U.S. News]
• Phoebe Philo talks at some length about her design process for her first Céline pre-spring and resort collections, which are to be shown in June. There's nary a mention of the fact that her first Céline collection was to be for fall 09, which booster Anna Wintour had booked into an exclusive Vogue editorial for the March issue, and which sources recently reported LVMH had gotten "a team" to work on in Philo's stead. [WWD]
• This completely escaped my notice: the real people in the background of the ad campaign for Isaac Mizrahi's first collection for Liz Clairborne include bloggers Dannielle Kyrillos of Daily Candy and Katrina Longworth of Spout Blog. Wonder whose idea that was? [Brand Freak]
• Model Heather Marks diaried her food intake for seven days in the run-up to New York fashion week. You can now commence arguing about whether or not it's healthy; I vote her a paragon of nutritional virtue, but then, I've been in this industry a long time. [Grub St.]
• Fendi's sole perfume, Palazzo, which launched in 2007, is being taken off the market due to disappointing sales. [WWD]
• Victoria's Secret has hired an L.A. entertainment company to help place their products in film and television venues. Look forward to a net increase of characters taking moments to adjust their VS bra straps in 3, 2, 1... [Brand Week]
• The Times of London has a sneak peek at a new exhibition of Madonna's clothes in the English capital, and a fascinating take on the semiotics of her Madgesty's dress. [Times of London]
• Oooh. I totally want stationery that features designers' doodles and sketches. [WWD]
• Fashion houses seem of two minds about how to design for the recession: some, like Louis Vuitton and Zac Posen, are talking all about "classic" this and neutral colors that, while others, like Coach, want more than ever to harness the bright sparkle of trendiness that might make their products stand out from others'. Everyone's going to be watching to see what Marc Jacobs does, of course. [WSJ]
• And whatever that might be, the Guardian has a good, long appreciation of Jacobs' recent Stephen Sprouse collection for Louis Vuitton, and a more than a few 80s New York stories of the designer himself. [Guardian]
• Unsurprisingly, Kate Moss is the female celebrity women most want to dress like. I think, cough, she is part of the reason Hunter rubber boots are selling so well, Wall Street Journal. [The Sun]
• Ew, Fergie has a shoe line now. [WWD]
• McDonald's McCafe will be the "official coffee" of New York fashion week, with espresso and drip coffee available for free in the tents all week long. Naturally they're expecting front-row celebs to be photographed, paper cups in hand. Micky D's hasn't traditionally had the best outreach with the womenfolk; I guess by now they figured out the shortest distance to a girl's heart is via vanilla latte. [AdAge]
• The pre-holiday 70% and 80% markdowns at Saks and other department stores were just a harbinger of things to come. Expect the big stores that can afford the hit to keep pushing prices down — and expect the smaller concerns to continue struggling to compete. [WSJ]
• This is just ridiculous. Heel height has nothing to do with the economic climate, and "sky-high heels," which I'm pretty sure didn't even exist in the 1930s since they didn't then know how to achieve height and strength by using a metal core within the heel shaft, have been in for about the last four years and certainly aren't any new recession thing. Who writes this crap, and why aren't they busy getting to the bottom of the Lipstick Sales Conundrum or retooling the Hemline Bellwether hypothesis? [The Sun]
• American Eagle Outfitters is suing Citigroup for allegedly misleading them into buying assets that they were assured were safe and liquid, but whose value has now plummeted. [Dealbook]
• Unlike Kellogg's, Speedo is standing by Michael Phelps in the wake of being photographed doing whatever he was doing with that unusual-looking pipe. [WWD]
• Jason Wu's PR firm threw the 26-year-old designer a party at the Soho Grand ahead of fashion week. [Style.com]
• Love magazine, the hotly-awaited brainchild of power stylist Katie Grand (formerly of Pop) has leaked its inaugural cover. It's a triple header, with one featuring Agyness dressed up as Queen Elizabeth II, another showing Iris Strubegger as a purple-haired cyber clubkid, and the third with Iggy Pop. Looks like a winner. [Models.com]

MOE: Hey hi what's up shit is pretty fucked huh.
MEGAN: It makes me a little glad I never leave my house. Hooray for blogoraphobia.
MOE: Okay, first things first: there are violent protests in Tibet, and China has to quell them in a way that doesn't make Stephen Spielberg look good, and now the protests have spread to other provinces.
Tibet has long been a pretty sweet separatist province to have, what with the exiled leader advocating nonviolence and spending most of his time with Beastie Boys etc. etc.
MEGAN: And getting to meet practically every head of state in the world, albeit unofficially...
Except for, obviously, those countries in Africa rapidly becoming Chinese client states.
MOE: China has a whole other separatist province called Xinjiang and no one pays attention to those guys. Because they're angry Muslims. Hey Sudanese Islamofascists? How's about some CONSISTENCY??
MEGAN: Wait, didn't we care about that for like 2 seconds last week when Al Qaeda did a video of training there? I didn't realize that we'd forgotten to care about that.
MOE: Hey, look, a story about a recent thwarted hijacking attempt by a Uighur Al Qaeda girlbomber! I think the Chinese government thinks you should care again.
MEGAN: Oh, thanks nameless Chinese propagandists newswriters!
Anyway, so, how soon until they start beating monks in the streets and we issue some sort of vague milquetoast protest about it that in no way compares to our reaction to the monk beatings in Myanmar? Or did I blink and miss it?
MOE: Oooooh, think Laura Bush drop her cookie sheet again and get on the phone with Hu Jintao?
MEGAN: Maybe she could send him cookies? I'll bet some chocolate chip ones could go a long way toward repairing US-China relations
MOE: I
Yikes, that disappeared.
MOE: Okay yeah so, it's very tricky what is happening with Tibet, but either way, it led to an incredibly cerebral discussion of Bjork on the comments over the weekend, did you see? My father was impressed with Bjork's timing on that one, but perhaps if he knew Bjork's tears cure cancer (too bad she never cries) he wouldn't be so surprised. Interestingly, this week Taiwan is holding elections, and he's headed out there. Taiwan is interesting because, you know, they really have it best, as "splittist" provinces go. Elections, democracy, a decent standard of living, no painful shared history of, like, cannibalism or Cultural Revolution or any such thing. The pro-China Kuomintang party is supposed to win though.
MEGAN: Interesting. Wait, now, Taiwan's pro-China even though China considers them a rogue provice? Taiwanese politics are so hard to understand. Is it possible that China's financing the Kuomintang or something
MOE: hahahaha well China's financing the entire economy, sort of like ours. The thing is that the Kuomintang came from mainland China and fled to Taiwan, with numerous palace treasures and such, in 1949. There they found a happy population of ethnic Chinese who spoke another dialect and also, Japanese because the Japanese colonized it, and proceeded to pretty much subjugate them until the seventies, when a democracy movement began burgeoning and our relations with the mainland made it a lot easier for Jimmy Carter to pressure the Kuomintang to treat the "ethnic Taiwanese" better. Somewhere in there Chiang Kai-shek died, his much nicer son Chiang Chingguo took over, and a kind of slow, steady democratization took hold. The thing is that most Chinese, no matter what dialect they speak, are pretty pragmatic and rational and no one wants war with China, but while they have us around a lot of them also don't feel like taking shit from China. On the other hand, of course, Taiwanese control most of the factories in China. It's complicated.
MEGAN: [Awkward segue alert] As complicated at Dina Mattos McGreevey's sex life?
MOE: Hey, good call. That conversation was certainly venturing into prurient and meaningless territory so I'm glad we can now focus our attention on The McGreevey-driver threesomes. I think my favorite part is that they were described as "intense" "hard-core consensual sex orgies".That sounds so...cardio! It's a good thing too I guess if they all started with get-togethers at T.G.I.Fridays.
MEGAN: Like, taking a date to TGI Fridays is so Jersey and let us not pretend that it is not because it is. Also, their intense 3-way orgies (which, can an orgy really only involve 3 people?) always involved one of the guys jacking off while one of them fucked Dina.
But what's sort of really interesting to me is that in earlier publications, he's said not to have started working for McGreevey until 2000, which throws off his timeline I think, and that Dina's divorce lawyer wants financial records about financial records and correspondence with McGreevey's rich boyfriend. Also, apparently, they're due in court soon to litigate over the money McGreevey is hiding from Matos so that he doesn't have to pay as much in child support and alimony. Fucker. Like, aren't gay men supposed to be the good ones?
MOE: Um yeah they shared a room at the TRUMP PLAZA in Atlantic City. Here is what I have to say about that; okay, there is a hotel room shortage in Atlantic City, sure. But if if you are the governor you get the "casino" rate and that is seventy bucks. "It became almost laughable — I would never have my own hotel room," Pedersen said. Okay, so a few things: what does this mean about Silda Spitzer? How long has the New York Post been sitting on this story just waiting for everyone to remember that they once for a brief moment cared about Dina Matos McGreevey?
MEGAN: I'm personally hoping that Silda's sunning herself on a beach somewhere foreign and being served tropical alcoholic beverages by inappropriately young but attractive cabana boys.
And that she and Eliot didn't fuck around with 3rd parties because it's one thing imagining Gay McGreevey jerking off and another entirely grosser thing to have to picture Eliot Spitzer in a wide variety of sexual situations
Excuse my while I go wash my brain out with bleach. Maybe you could talk about the financial markets and i'll try to think of something to say that makes it sound like my summer interning for the Bank of New York wasn't a complete waste of time for everyone involved?
MOE: Okay, well, the government is going to have to print money to bail out the banks because they made the financial instruments so complicated no one has a fucking clue how much, if anything, they're worth, and everything is so interconnected that it could all collapse like in the Asian Financial Crisis unless the Fed steps in and offers a quarter trillion dollars to save it. Or something.
Here it is explained by someone named Dave Wilson who is on some email list that my ex-boyfriend is on.

There's currently a kind of cascade failure happening throughout the financial community, spurred
both by extraordinary levels of borrowed money that was used to speculate (it's like those mortgages that were issued for 110% of the value of the house, except that type of "investment" has, unbeknownst to most people, actually been taking place in pretty much every investment sphere you can think of); if those speculative investments go South, investors have to come up with lots of cash, fast, (this is known as a margin call) meaning they wind up selling everything they own to raise cash, which then depresses the value of the stuff the investors had to sell (as well as similar stuff owned by others) since suddenly there's a lack of scarcity combined with a suspicion on the part of would-be buyers that perhaps this stuff is being dumped for reasons other than a need for quick cash...

Last fall, the former Treasury secretary confessed to Fortune magazine that until the mortgage storms broke over his head in the summer of 2007, he was unfamiliar with the kinds of complex mortgage structures with which Citi's own balance sheet was packed. Almost certainly, the gulf between competence and compensation on Wall Street has never been wider.

"Why not set an example of Bear Stearns, the guys who have this record of dog-eat-dog, we're brass knuckles, we're tough?" asked William A. Fleckenstein, president of Fleckenstein Capital in Issaquah, Wash., and co-author with Fred Sheehan of "Greenspan's Bubbles: The Age of Ignorance at the Federal Reserve." "This is the perfect time to set an example, but they are not interested in setting an example. We are Bailout Nation."

"Dividends are a girl's best friend" and "Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue chip," are headlines launching in print ads this month.

What of emerging markets? High-margin growth stocks? High profile stocks that have taken a beating recently? What are they, afraid we'll be as stupid as all the men who invested in securities backed by the no-down-payment mortgages of indebted Americans? Don't worry, we've TOTALLY cut up too many credit cards to make that mistake!!