So much drama today in Midweek Madness! There might be four SATC flicks; Heidi Montag's a prisoner in her own home; Lindsay Lohan's telling her little sister to get a nose job and implants, James Franco's student film features penises.

• Jim Carrey is getting all up in Elin Nordegren's business, for some reason, and posting his thoughts on her marriage to Tiger Woods on his Twitter page:

• Jon Paul Buchmeyer, who worked as a publicist for Tyra Banks during her Inside Out book tour, has spilled some secrets about the Smize Queen in his new memoir:

• A moment of silence: Madonna and Jesus Luz are broken up.

[Miami, November 30. Image via INFDaily.]

[New York, October 13. Image via INFDaily.]

• Kate Gossselin will be going after Jon Gosselin for "raiding" their joint bank account.

• Whoopi Goldberg on Patrick Swayze:

Filming for the Sex And The City sequel began today, and if you take a ludicrously close look at pictures of Sarah Jessica Parker on the set, it's easy to see what's happening to her character!

• Well here's one we haven't heard before: A source claims that Macaulay Culkin is Blanket Jackson's father. [The Sun]
• Also: Prince Michael Malachi Jet Jackson, 24, claims Michael Jackson is his dad. [TMZ]

Details of the SATC sequel are kept under tight wraps, but: it's come to our attention that - wait for it - the plum role of Mr. Big's office will be played by law firm Hogan & Hartson. [ATL]

• Is Brad Pitt done with showbiz? It almost seems like he's dropping hints:

While we've already discussed the cover of Bazaar's July issue (and the cover story), a fashion layout inside is also worth questioning.

• Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's former bodyguard Mickey Brett might pen a tell-all or sell a TV show based on his life working for the A-list couple.

• Kate Moss has been cooking for her boyfriend, Jamie Hince. Now she wants to be the first supermodel to release a cook book and it may be kosher for passover.

[Vancouver, April 2. Images via Bauer-Griffin.]

[Los Angeles, December 14. Image via INF]

[New York, July 25. Image via INFDaily]