• Beyoncé's first perfume, Heat, launches in February. She says, "Red is one of my favorite colors, as is gold." And the bottle is intended to look antique, because her mother had so many old perfumes when she was little. [WWD]

• Whitney Port, of The Hills/The City fame, says, of fellow fashion-designing show alums Lauren Conrad and Heidi Montag, "I put myself in a different sort of realm as them." Port's biggest fear with her label is "people not understanding your point of view, not being able to get it. But I think my biggest competition is myself." [WWD]
• About 200 Chanel employees picketed the company's headquarters just outside of Paris. Workers who make less than €3000 a month have been offered a 1% pay raise; instead, they would like a raise of 2.5%. [WWD]
• Charlize Theron embroidered a baobab tree on a pair of red Toms shoes for her limited-edition collaboration with the eco-friendly, ethically managed company. Ten thousand of the shoes will be distributed free to children in her native South Africa, and the profits from the $54 slip-ons will benefit Theron's charity. [People]
• According to Jimmy Choo, Madonna thinks his shoes are better than sex. "Madonna told me that buying a pair of my shoes is more satisfying than having sex with a man. At least you know they are going to last for ever!" [OK!]
• Tory Burch is growing overseas. The designer recently opened a flagship in Manila, and her first Tokyo store, which just fêted its launch, will be joined by 30 more outposts across the country over the next few years. [WWD]
• Check out the decade in Olsen style, from distressed denim and tube tops to Chloé wedges and studded Givenchy jackets, via the notorious NYU bag lady period. [Style.com]
• Ever since Barack Obama identified his wife's pin, on Oprah, as one he had purchased for her at Garavelli on their anniversary, people have been buying Garavelli jewelry like it's going out of style. [WWD]
• Lady Gaga curated a selection of goods for sale at the site Not Just A Label. You can snap up her fringed lace half hat from the video for "Bad Romance" for a surprisingly reasonable £92, should you feel the need to dress like a deranged Spanish widow from 2078. [NJAL]
• Malls in Dubai still seem busy, despite the debt crisis there. [WWD]
• Hilary Rhoda will be in next year's Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. Friend-to-Jezebel Liz Glover recently interviewed the model and asked her about her shoot for last year's issue. "For a model, it is a major achievement and a business tactic to widen my fan base," said the Chevy Chase native, over e-mail. "I work out every day, and to have a strong body instead of something frail like in fashion magazines, that's something to look up to." Rhoda, of course, sometimes does appear in the pages of fashion magazines — she once made the cover of American Vogue. Could her athletic look gain high-fashion acceptance? We can dare to dream. [Washington Times]
• Model Jamie Bochert recently ran 12 blocks to get her purse back from a robber. Now that's an athlete. Also she is in the new Lanvin campaign. [WWD]
• Christian Siriano says his maternity line includes party dresses because, "When you're pregnant you still do the same things that you would normally do — go to events, baby showers and weddings. Not every brand does sweet, fun party dresses like this." [People]
• Says Carmen Dell'Orefice, whose name this time Page Six spells correctly: "Sympathy I don't need. Another ad campaign would be great." Dell'Orefice lost most of her fortune in Bernie Madoff's ponzi scheme. [P6]
• More details have emerged about the fashion business incubator program launching soon in New York. Twelve lucky designers will be given the opportunity to rent studio space in the heart of the garment district for under market rates — around $1500 a month. The program is underwritten by a $200,000 grant from the New York City Economic Development Corporation and operated by the Council of Fashion Designers of America. The tenant designers will be announced this month. [FWD]
• Because of dismal sales, Ben Sherman is shuttering its women's line. The company earlier this year stopped making children's wear. [WWD]
• Nike's quarterly results for the period ended November 30 were only slightly down on last year's. Profits and sales at the world's largest sporting goods company each fell by 4%. [WSJ]

• Lady Gaga, in a show of uncharacteristic sartorial restraint, wore a chiffon-and-human-hair Holly Russell dress that more or less covered her legs to an awards show. She thanked her publicist. [WWD]

• Marc Jacobs loves people wearing his clothes. Even knock-offs: "Even when I see a copy, something that's inspired by something I've done, it's a rewarding feeling." [TeenVogue]
• Richard Nicoll is the new women's wear designer of Cerutti. [WWD]
• At a party celebrating a champagne's ascension to the menu at the Lowell Hotel — verily, some people will show up to the opening of an envelope in this town — a woman told a story about a fashion designer who never let a little thing like a death in the family interfere with his duties as a host. "Once I was in Rome for a dinner at Valentino's villa in honor of Jacqueline Kennedy. Sadly, his father had died upstairs earlier in the day. Valentino, always a gentleman, did not wish to upset his guests, so he didn't announce the death until the next day. Jackie had a wonderful time." [P6]
• Coach is suing Target for allegedly selling knock-offs of its handbags. A federal judge dismissed Coach's last infringement suit against the retail giant. [WWD]
• What recession? Domenico Dolce just bought two Manhattan penthouses for $29 million. [NYPost]
• Some 30 outfits belonging to Audrey Hepburn will be auctioned, along with the actress's letters, in London this December. Naturally, there's heaps of Givenchy. [Telegraph]
• Meanwhile, the Brooklyn Museum is auctioning off nearly 8,000 garments and accessories from its costume collection, following the decision to merge its fashion with the Met's. Items from as far back as the 17th Century, as well as modern looks by designers like Bonnie Cashin and Halston, will be deaccessioned as a cost-cutting measure. [NYPost]
• Rosie O'Donnell would like everyone to know that despite her starring role in Nora Ephron's Love, Loss, And What I Wore — a play which contains a joke about wearing Eileen Fisher being tantamount to announcing, "I give up" — she really loves the brand. "When we did the first reading of the play, I said to Nora, ‘I'm really objecting to the Eileen Fisher comment being that I just purchased every single thing she makes and threw out everything else I own. Literally, my entire wardrobe is only Eileen Fisher…that and sweat suits." [WWD]
• Last week in Los Angeles, David Beckham launched something called the David Beckham by J. Bond Collection for Adidas's Originals by Originals line. "It's my style. I wanted to create something that everybody could wear whether it be going to practice, or the gym in the morning, or going for a coffee or going out to dinner at night," explained the soccer star. Coffee or dinner! How versatile. [People]
• Tory Burch loved being on Gossip Girl. "I have never acted before, so I was a little nervous about messing up my line. Blake made me laugh and put me at ease though, and the crew was so gracious." [People]
• Is it proper to call Lindsay Lohan a "client" of the Ungaro boutique when no indication is given that she is paying for the $150,000 worth of clothing she snapped up there in just one trip? Mounir Moufarrige, the guy who hired Lohan to "revive" Ungaro on the justification that "it could work," says: "What do you want, for her to be naked? I'm just so glad she likes Ungaro." [WWD]
• After the new artistic advisor's first Ungaro show in Paris, she may be the only one. Moufarrige went on to say, "I'll tell you one thing on the level: I'm crazy." The collection — which was styled with sparkly love-heart pasties — was so bad that front-row photographer Greg Kessler asked guests to pose as Lohan by hiding their heads in their hands. [NYTimes]
• The after-party, to which the actress arrived late, was no better. Possibly because Ungaro designer Estrella Archs spent her time reading the reviews. Either the stunt will work, said owner Asim Abdullah, or "we go down in a blaze of glory. Or unglory." [WSJ]
• Reviews that rated the show thusly: "An embarrassment." [WWD]
• And: "The Emanuel Ungaro show on Sunday may go down in history as the final gasp of celebrity madness." That line's from a little story, entitled "Hearts But No Soul," by a woman who goes by Suzy Menkes. [IHT]
• Lohan, for her part, says working for Ungaro is "pretty much a fairytale." [People]
• As part of its ongoing "Go Forth" ad campaign, Levi's is launching some kind of online game to build its brand image. Its advertising agency invented the odiously named Grayson Ozias IV, a 19th Century home recording artist around whom the game revolves. Tediously, there is a "corporate responsibility" phase of gameplay, in which players will vote on which charity will receive Ozias' $100,000 "fortune." [AW]
• Levi's would like to point out that 75 years ago, it pioneered the marketing of jeans to women. Not that Levi's, or notoriously non-environmentally friendly denim production in general, is any particular friend to the predominantly female, and overwhelmingly non-union, garment workforce it relies upon. [Feministing]
• Stella McCartney — a woman who was once hired for an unlikely position (head designer at Chloé) by Mounir Moufarrige, though that is neither here nor there — thinks long and hard about the environmental impact of her garment dyes. And she sure seems pretty smart and likable in this interview. [Guardian]
• Meanwhile, McCartney's latest replacement at Chloé, Hannah MacGibbon, says of contemporary fashion, "Everything's so hard at the moment. I don't feel like wearing that at all, even though it's nice to look at. It's completely lacking that sentiment that draws you in — the emotion of it….There's a lack of romanticism in the air. There's a real need for that softness."
• If you just can't wait to see Alexander McQueen's spring show when it's broadcast live from Paris on Showstudio tomorrow, check out the teaser greatest-hits clip that's already running. [Showstudio]
• According to one survey of Japanese retailers being bandied about at Paris fashion week, Alexander Wang has the "hottest" brand right now. Whatever that means. [WWD]
• Is it still news that Kate Moss continues to "design" collections for Topshop? Yes, because it's moderately cute? No, because it's hilariously overpriced? Maybe, because it might inspire a productive trip to the Salvation Army? In any case, Kate Moss continues to "design" collections for Topshop. [Refinery29]
• Latest datum in the Evidence That Martin Margiela Is No Longer With Maison Martin Margiela file: the fact that Maison Martin Margiela has signed on to do something as douche-bourgeois lifestyle-brand-y as "redecorating a suite at Les Sources de Caudalie "vinotherapy" spa near Bordeaux, which is feting its 10th anniversary this year." [WWD]
• Israeli Sports Illustrated model — and current Israeli Defense Force draftee — Esti Ginzberg has added to criticism of fellow model — and compulsory service avoider — Bar Refaeli. After a general called Refaeli a draft-dodger for avoiding Israel's standard 2-year service by taking advantage of rules regarding soldiers' marital status (Refaeli briefly married a family friend), Ginzberg, who started her service in July, told the press, "enlisting is a duty, not a choice. There are a million things I don't feel like doing, but I do them because I have to. Military service is part of the things I believe in, the values I was raised on." Around a quarter of young Israelis find ways to make themselves ineligible for IDF service; Refaeli says she totally really absolutely wanted to do hers, but "celebrities have other needs." Ginzberg is putting in her two years at an IDF reception base, where among other things, she tells new recruits that enlisting is important. Naturally, the media's playing this one as a catwalk catfight. [Independent]
• There's a rumor going around that Milan fashion week might become Rome fashion week. [WWD]
• Betsey Johnson, of all people, is being honored this fall by the National Arts Club. We cannot wait to see how that particular hot-pink whirlwind of hair extensions takes to the club's stodgy Gramercy Park headquarters. [WWD]

• Emma Watson is doing a clothing line with ethical fashion company People Tree. We're still waiting for Mischa Barton's collection, Tree People. [Guardian]

• Rachel Zoe, on extra-curricular fashion week activities: "I went to a meeting with a potential book publisher, because I am starting to wrap my head around doing my next book, which I am really excited about. I've gotten a little bit of my creative writing fill with doing the Zoe Report, my daily newsletter, and really remembered how much I love writing." Funny, because I met the Zoe Report's ghost blogger a couple weeks back! (Nice girl.) [Time]
• Jil Sander's line for Uniqlo, +J, starts hitting stores on October 1. The legendary German perfectionist says, "I like the concept of basic clothes in a democratic world. Uniqlo reminds me of Apple computers; fantastic design for everyone. And I like what is Japanese about Uniqlo, a strong sense of tradition, the orderly approach to everything, great know-how and logistics." Uniqlo dreams of taking over the position of Inditex — parent company of Zara — as the world's largest apparel company by 2020. The success of the retail chain's planned expansion will rest in large part on Sander's talents. [Telegraph]
• Journalistic pet peeve #1: Confusing "discrete" for "discreet." Journalistic pet peeve #2: Spending ten minutes reading an article that tediously explains events that happened a year ago. Who doesn't already know that last fall, "upscale department stores...started slashing prices to unload a glut of inventory. Saks fired the first volley, slapping 70%-off signs on luxury designer clothing in early November 2008. Neiman and Barneys frantically followed suit." [Time]
• For some apparel trade news that is actually, you know, news, how about this: apparel sales rose 2.4% from July to August, the biggest month-to-month increase since February. Sales were still down 5% on last August. [NYTimes]
• If more couples are staying home to have sex because of the recession — sex being, as Chip Lambert pointed out in The Corrections, one of the few pleasures in life that's actually free — wouldn't we be buying fewer pajamas, not more? [Telegraph]
• Courtney Love's fashion week highlights, so far: "Me playing at Alexander Wamg. That was certainly the fucking best. And then the second best was me playing at Alexander Wang." Anything else? "The Rodarte bitches were awesome." [The Cut]
• Abercrombie & Fitch has lost its appeal in the discrimination case brought by the family of an autistic girl who was not allowed to go into a changing room with her sister at the Mall of America store. The then-14-year-old was shopping with her then-17-year-old sibling, who notified a sales assistant that her sister had a disability and could not be left alone. In court, Abercrombie trotted out a psychologist as an expert witness who said that, "this experience is best considered to be a desirable outcome of active community involvement." Because having Abercrombie refuse to make a reasonable accommodation "offers the parents the opportunity to model social problem solving and coping skills to their daughter, as they have done so well throughout her life, and thus prepare her for such future natural community experiences." Abercrombie was fined $115,264. [MPR]
• Dan Ariely, the professor who studies branding and behavior and who concludes that wearing counterfeit designer goods makes people more dishonest in their every day life — on the basis of one study, which lacked a control group — is back to explain his nifty ideas in video format. How about this new rule for science: No studies where the scientist explains his methods thus: "We got Chloé to give us sunglasses..." And no studies that are presented at conferences convened by Harper's Bazaar. [BigThink]
• Dan Caten, one half of DSquared, on the brand's new eyewear line: "It's a way that people can buy into the brand. Maybe some people can't afford to buy the clothes or fit in the clothes." Instead of making clothes above a size 10, let's license out some sunglasses! (Average price: $391.) Perfect solution. [WSJ]
• Ann Taylor is holding an in-season runway show tonight in New York, with a real fashion quotient: Kate Young will be styling. It's all part of the retailer's attempt to turn around its dowdy image. (You may have noticed the new ad campaign starring model Cameron Russell.) [WWD]
• Heidi Klum, whom you may have heard of, is taking Cameron's spot for the retailer's holiday ads. But don't expect her at the show, because she's expecting, and can't fly to New York. [NYPost]
• Vogue's publisher, Tom Florio, doesn't want to talk about McKinsey — but he will take a softball on why he goes to fashion shows: "I look for trends in the business. Like the whole idea of luxury at a better price point, which is something Tory Burch is doing. I try to get a sense of the sociological trends which our editors will adapt. It just adds a little context. You need to understand the business trends like global warming and fabrics getting lighter and more transitional pieces in fashion. If you can speak intelligently about these things when you sell ad pages, you can sort of take their [advertisers'] point of view." [NYObs]
• Burberry, which already has around 600,000 Facebook friends, is launching its own social networking site at artofthetrench.com. Christopher Bailey has commissioned Scott Schuman to take pictures of people wearing Burberry trench coats around the world for the site. Users will also be able to send in pictures of themselves wearing Burberry trench coats. [FT]
• The British brand will also stream its Prorsum fashion show live over the Internet. It's scheduled for September 22, 6:30 p.m., London time. [WWD]
• Avon president Elizabeth Smith is leaving the company. No replacement has yet been named. [Crain's]
• French Connection has laid off 50 workers at its head offices and closed its offices in Denmark and Sweden as a response to continued weak sales. [Independent]

• Charlize Theron has nabbed the September cover of a slimmed-down Vogue. The issue counts only 584 pages, compared with the 840 pages of Sienna Miller's 2007 issue. Theron last made the cover in October 2007. [TFS]

• Kate Moss is the fall face of Just Cavalli. Splitting the difference between the competing trends of top- and bottomlessness, she poses for one ad in a tuxedo jacket and nothing else, and for another in some kind of leopard-print leotard. In a third, she wears a micromini sequined dress that seems to be held up with magic. [FWD]
• Legendary photographer Corinne Day — whose pictures of Kate Moss for The Face helped put the supermodel on the map — is facing a serious illness, and requires expensive medical treatment. Friends are trying to raise money by selling 500 prints of a 2001 photo of Moss nude on a bed; the pictures are £100 each. [LOVE, link NSFW]
• The first images of Jil Sander's hotly anticipated +J line for Uniqlo have just surfaced, and it looks fantastic. Japanese magazine Non-No shot seven looks from the men's collection, and it's entirely apparent that the German designer has not lost her talent for tailoring and her ability to pare down a look to its most basic, striking elements during her years in the fashion wilderness after being fired from her namesake label by owners Prada. +J, which hits Uniqlo stores this November, includes around 140 pieces of men's and women's wear, and prices start at $25. [Hypebeast]
• Macy's has announced that Ne-Yo will be the new face of Alfani's Red men's wear. [WWD]
• Uma Thurman has the campaign for Givenchy's new Angel or Demon perfume. [The Sun]
  
• Under Isaac Mizrahi's direction, Liz Claiborne continues to seek a higher-fashion image without shedding its affordability. To wit: this fall, Coco Rocha and her old flaming red hair star in a very kaleidoplaid campaign. Also, count this as another example of the models-in-the-supermarket fashion imagery trope. [Design Scene]
• Patrick Robinson and his design team at the Gap have been concentrating on the basics — and particularly on revamping the company's various styles of jeans. To advertise the offerings, the company has chosen a bevvy of top models, including Carmen Kass, Anja Rubik, and Arlenis Sosa, each identified with a particular style of denim — "The Boyfriend," "Curvy," "Long & Lean," etc. We wonder who it was, though, who chose to put the lesbian model Freja Beha Erichsen next to giant type that reads "Real Straight." [Models.com]
• Loeffler Randall is adding e-commerce to its website. [WWD]
• Jewelry designer Anna Sheffield's collection for Target hits stores at the end of this month. The pieces range from $19.99-$79.99; some are made of sterling silver. They all look very cool. [Lucky]
• You know the economy's terrible when Jessica Seinfeld serves pigs-in-blankets to Gwyneth at a charity gala. [WWD]
• In Paris, several recent fashion school graduates are starting their own lines — with a difference: instead of focusing on the tradition ready-to-wear, these young designers each want to do small collections made-to-measure for each client. And the prices are right: 50-80 Euros for a shirt, 70 Euros for a dress, 150 Euros for a jacket. In putting an affordable price on services that are something more than tailoring and something less than couture, with all its connotations of excess, these youngsters have almost certainly found a gap in the market. [DazedDigital]
• Meanwhile, shoe designer Jeffrey Campbell knocked off a Chloé boot. His offerings this season are basically just Ann Demeulemeester's and Balmain's shoes done for cheap(er). How is it this guy hasn't gotten sued yet? (Of course, Chloé probably took inspiration for their shoes from some vintage boots.) [The Greyest Ghost]
• And there are also instances of high-end brands ripping off less-expensive ones. Cf. Proenza Schouler's version of the Frye boot. [On The Fringe Of Fashion]
• After the record-breaking sale of all the art he collected with Yves Saint Laurent, partner Pierre Bergé plans to go ahead with an auction of furniture, sculptures, and textiles in November. The works are expected to fetch around $5.7 million; the proceeds will go to AIDS research. [WWD]
• Miss J's new memoir, Follow The Model: Miss J's Guide To Unleashing Presence, Poise And Power contains a troubling blind item about not being let in to a fashion show on the explicit instructions of the head of the PR company running the designer's front-of-house operations. The PR company seems to be Kelly Cutrone's People's Revolution, and the designer — specified as Brazilian — seems to be either Carlos Miele or Alexandre Herchcovitch. Was Miss J denied entry because he is black, or because he now bears the taint of Night-Time Tyra? The latter seems unlikely, since Miss J points out that the same designer later begged America's Next Top Model to use his line for the finale runway show when ANTM went to Brazil in Season 12. (That particular laurel went to Rosa Chá.) [Fashionista]
• The New York Fashion Week menswear schedule is out, and it contains some surprises. This season, Yigal Azrouël is killing his separate men's wear presentation, and combining his two shows into one. Philip Lim is doing the exact opposite, adding a separate men's wear presentation. [WWD]
• Feast your eyes on ShopBop's "WARTIME" array of products, and ponder the aestheticization of orchestrated human killing. [ShopBop]

The Good:
Ooh, Kate Bosworth's delectable gown is reminiscent of Oleg Cassini.


Estelle is kind of becoming a fashion icon; how cute and spunky is this little romper?


Camilla Alves: like TV's pretend idea of what a real girl wears, but like a hundred times better.


Rachel Zoe's not a stylist for nothing, but then you reach her face and she's always making a face like she's smelled something nasty.


Say what one will about Agyness, she makes average clothes look cool, and expensive clothes look attainable, and that's really kind of the point.


Emma Stone: easy, breezy, beautiful.


Yes, I love me a good jumpsuit, and Gaile Lai's 80's/riveter iteration is exactly that!


Janelle Monae's is probably my favorite getup of the evening, and possibly in history.


Maria Sharapova has just totally justified her celebrity.


The Bad:
Krysten Ritter's futuristic nurse is ready for triage. (Good word!)


Astrid Bryant: Moratorium, please, on Hefty couture.


What Is Going ON?
Exhibit A: Zoe Saldana.


Exhibit B: Chloe Sevigny.


Exhibit C: Leighton Meester!

[Images via Getty]

Let's face it. If you are a normal person, you do not have close to $800 to spend on a pair of shoes. And even if you did, you would probably be spending it on something you could wear over and over again, or, hell, something you could wear at all. (Forget "if you have to ask you can't afford it", this is "if you have to be mobile you can't afford it.")

"I feel horrible when my girls come in here and say, 'I can't spend this much on sandals,' " says one boutique owner, who spoke with the Los Angeles Times regarding the rising price of ridiculous shoes. "They think it's my fault, but I am paying these high prices too." Another LA boutique owner agrees. "When Chloé came on the scene, I remember noticing it. All of a sudden, every line started designing a shoe collection that was more elaborate and more expensive."

Why do women do it? Bankrupting themselves, making their tootsies uglier and forcing pain upon themselves for some perverse pleasure gotten from owning something so impractical, so debilitating, and so (we repeat) fug? Let us not forget the sagacious words of our favorite paper, London's Daily Mail, which explains the allure of high heels thusly: "Men like an exaggerated female figure." Yeah, my boyfriend who insists men aren't looking at my feet? Apparently he's right.

Whatsa Matter With Choo? [NY Observer]
Manolo Lovers Feel Financial Pain At the Pump [LA Times]
Life's Little Mysteries [Daily Mail]

[Image via Style.com]

• Anna Wintour claims she is very concerned about how "pale and thin" the models look nowadays. Don't worry, Anna, next to you they look vibrant and full of color! [WWD, 4th item]
  
• Here's your public service announcement of the day: The ingredient 1,4-Dioxane, which is found in many organic beauty and cleaning products, has been found to be carcinogenic. Go de-green your home now. Just don't mix any ammonia with chlorine in the process! [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• "You could say the baseball cap comes from a jockey cap worn by a Russian princess in the 1760s," says milliner Nasir Mazhar. [Vogue UK]
  
• Designer Giles Deacon says if he wasn't a designer he would be a zookeeper. [Independent]
  
• Ghanian businessman Kwabena Osei Bonsu making handbags from plastic litter he finds strewn throughout Accra. We don't normally endorse "handbag designer" as a profession, but that's kind of cool. I wonder if you could make handbags out of "space junk"? [Independent]

• Whoah USB port engagement rings; I totally want one. For my right hand of course. [Chic Report]
• Oh phew: Hermes profits are up. [WWD, sub req'd]
• MAC and Heatherette: Doing a makeup line together. Oh, Lydia Hearst is going to be all over this shit. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Former Chloe designer Phoebe Philo is apparently itching for a new design gig. [WWD, 2nd item]
• And 6267 designers Tommaso Aquilano and Roberto Rimondi are rumored to be taking over the reins at Gianfranco Ferre. [WWD, 5th item]
• Ossie Clark's widow Celia Birtwell is designing a limited-edition capsule collection for...Express. Uh, yeah, that'll save your languishing business, Express. [WWD, sub req'd]
• OMG the suspense is killing us; Will Carla Bruni wear Chanel or Dior when visiting UK PM Gordon Brown and his wife with new husband French president Nicolas Sarkozy next week? [WWD, 3rd item]
• Hot deal alert: A $3,509 python skin laptop bag. [Chic Report]

• Who will win the Council of Fashion Designers of America's Womenswear Designer of the Year award, the "Best Picture" of fashion? The nominees are: Marc Jacobs, Francisco Costa of Calvin Klein, and Lazaro Hernandez and Jack McCollough of Proenza Schouler (who tied last year with Oscar de la Renta.) Bets? [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Oooh and Fran Lebowitz will emcee the awards themselves on June 2. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Ok, so now Waris Dirie is saying she was abducted and assaulted while she was missing in Brussels. And treated like "prostitute" by police. She originally said she was just, like, lost. Her manager says she was in shock. [Telegraph, Yahoo]
  
• And what is Erin Fetherston's latest short film about? "Zooey [Deschanel] plays a tramp who eats a magic mushroom and finds herself with a group of fairies." Of course she does. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Whoah is Posh going to guest-design for Roland Mouret? Whoah. [Fashionista]

• Model Erin O'Connor sprained her ankle! Why God created blogs: "The thought of not being able to wear teetering heels for a sustainable period fills me with dread! Think of a vicar without a dog collar...a bus driver without a bus??? Eek, you know elevation and a well-turned ankle are all essential requirements in this job. I suppose, to look on the bright side one doesn't need one's heels to write one's blog on the laptop." [Vogue UK]
• Another woman takes the reigns at a fashion design house: Hannah MacGibbon, 38, will debut her first collection as lead designer for Chloe this October in Paris. [WWD]
• ELLE's creative director Joe Zee is getting his own column in the ladymag, entitled "Style A to Zee." Ha ha ha how terribly clever! But yet, also familiar! Oh, right. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Victoria Beckham: Frowns on skinny jeans for men. [DNR]
• Helena Christensen is going to be "designing" for Tocca. And by that they mean she's going to "recreate" an old design of theirs and put her name on it. [WWD, sub req'd]
• What did Donna Karan give her daughter Gaby for her birthday? A bicycle! How...Donna Karan of her! [Fashion Week Daily]
• This month Madonna is styled as a boxer for the cover of the new, improved Interview magazine...and she's also styled as a boxer for the cover of Dazed & Confused. Huh. [Chic Report]
• Victoria's Secret latest beauty line seems to be aimed at teens. Um, as opposed to everything else they sell? [BellaSugar]
• Ksubi denim founder George Gorrow thinks the internet is "kind of a crock." Cosign. [Sassybella]

[Image from Vivienne Westwood's show via Getty.]

• Jennifer Lopez is expected to file suit against former Sweetface design partner Andy Hilfiger, ostensibly because, uh, the line really sucks. Hilfiger, meanwhile, is expected to countersue because Lopez' hubby Marc Anthony is a psychotic asshole. [NY Daily News]
  
• In a strange twist of fate, PETA's new phone number was previously "owned" by designer Zac Posen's mother, Susan Posen. Now, when people call the number looking for Susan, PETA officials kindly inform them that her son is murdering animals for his designs. [NY Daily News]
  
• Kim Cattrall: Future PETA target? It appears her wardrobe is awfully croc-skin heavy in the upcoming Sex and the City movie. [WWD, 6th item]
  
• Karl Lagerfeld won a raffle? That seems wrong, somehow. [WWD, 3rd item]

• "I have a soft spot for Galliano; Alexander McQueen, however, that's a different story for another day." —Manolo Blahnik [Fashion Week Daily]
• The entire Elle fashion department (including Joe Zee, Anne Slowey, and Project Runway star Nina Garcia) were eating dinner at NYC restaurant Indochine at the very same time that French Vogue's Carine Roitfeld was at the restaurant for her son's birthday. [Fashion Week Daily]
• LOL of course Madonna is co-hosting Gucci's upcoming February fundraising event "A Night to Benefit Raising Malawi and UNICEF." [WWD, 1st item]
• Louis Vuitton and the Burlington Coat Factory have reached a settlement over that whole manufacturing and selling of fake bags things. [Sassybella]
• Boutique perfume label Bond No. 9's top nose Laurice Rahme has launched the first-ever known perfume bottle recycling initiative. Under Rahme's direction, all Bond No. 9 stores and counters will accept empty perfume bottles of any brand and ensure the glass is recycled. [Fashion Week Daily]
• Natalia Vodianova is the face of the upcoming Diane von Furstenberg spring 2008 advertising campaign, the first ad campaign DVF has had in decades. We never realized that Diane didn't advertise, which gives us weird, newfound respect for the wrap dress. [Vogue UK]
• For Vogue's Lauren Davis' upcoming nuptials, each of her socialite bridesmaids has been paired with a different designer who will create a different gown for each woman. (Participating designers are Derek Lam, Proenza Schouler, Vera Wang, Giambattista Valli, and Alberta Ferretti.) This is why we hate socialites. [Fashion Week Daily]
• For the gay geek in your life: A Chloe iPhone! [Portfolio]

• Kate Moss: Looks sexy in new Donna Karan ads. Donna Karan: Guest judge on Project Runway tonight. That is all. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• "My mother always said it was a good thing I went into fashion because it proved I didn't have any great expectations of myself, and she was right. I haven't made an empire with my name on it. I don't go around calling myself an artist. If anything, I'm a whore. I go wherever they pay me," Karl Lagerfeld. But surely you did that H&M collection for the art, right Karl? [Vogue UK]
  
• Lily Allen, Rinko Kikuchi, Charlotte Casiraghi, Natalie Imbruglia, Thandie Newton, Claudia Schiffer and Emma Watson are all expected to attend the Chanel pre-fall collection in London tomorrow. Wait: Natalie Imbruglia is still around? Remember when she dated David Schwimmer? [WWD, 1st item]

• "I think of advertisers as investors investing in my vision, and it's hard not to take people who don't support your magazine in a different breath. I run a fashion-entertainment magazine, where it's not church and state. To me, it's one big church." —Marvin Scott Jarrett, editor-in-chief of Nylon. At least he's honest? [WWD, 3rd item]
• If you find yourself in New York, might we suggest skipping posing with Santa at Macy's in favor of posing with a giant swan at the Marc Jacobs store? [Fashion Week Daily]
• What? Forever21 knocked something off? For real? The full, shocking story here. [Sassybella]
• Revenue is waaaay up at Guess? No, that's not a question; remember how it's called "Guess?" [The Street]
• Ferragamo and Prada: Both planning on going public next year! Or like, eventually someday. [WSJ]
• "Customers should know the deliveries and that the store is divided by day and evening all the time. When people don't find what they are looking for very quickly, they just leave, and we don't want people to leave!" This is Domenico Dolce, weirdly/sweetly earnest, regarding the re-opening of the Dolce & Gabbana store in New York. [Fashion Week Daily]
• The Gap founders: still planning on opening a modern art museum in San Francisco. The community: apparently excited. Why? Well, we read on. It's going to be called the Contemporary Art Museum at the Presido. "CAMP" for short. Love! [WWD, sub req'd]
• Gucci: The Movie? Directed by Ridley Scott??? Don't tell Tom Ford! [WWD, 4th item]

• Lancome spokeswoman Kate Winslet managing to sound annoying while dissing the celebrity product endorsement business: "I remember five or six years ago, it was really a big deal to be the face of a campaign or a spokesperson for a particular brand name. Now, it just doesn't seem to matter so much." [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Tim McGraw is getting his own fragrance through Coty; we hope it smells like blue jeans, beer and jealous wives. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Katherine Heigl is the face of Nautica's newest fragrance "My Voyage for Her," a name which sounds to us sounds like some seventies book on the female orgasm, but okay. [WWD, sub req'd]

• And in further fragrance news, singer Eve wants one, even if no deal has been inked yet: "I not only want to meet the nose, but I want to be the nose. I want to be that person who's in there putting stuff in the little bottles. I'm obsessed with smells." [WWD, 2nd item]
• Designer Rogan Gregory has won the CFDA/Vogue fashion award, beating out Philip Lim, Erin Fetherston, the Threeasfour gang, the Vena Cava girls, and the duo behind VPL. Honestly, what? We didn't even really realize he was in the running. Also he designs jeans and T-shirts. Albeit, eco-friendly jeans made with fair trade cotton and endorsed by Bono's wife or something. [Vogue UK]
• CoverGirl is giving itself a makeover, with its advertising to be more focused on "individualized beauty" and less about its approach of "fresh and clean" beauty. Which would normally be "whatever" until you think of the implications for NEXT WEEK'S EPISODE OF TOP MODEL WHEREIN THEY SHOOT COVERGIRL COMMERCIALS. We so think Heather is going to win. [WWD, sub req'd]
• J.Lo is now designing an intimates collection. It is to be "infused with Latino sensuality." [WWD, sub req'd]
• Okay, but if you thought that was absurd: Vivienne Westwood's cultural-political manifesto, uniformly declared a flop when she presented it earlier this year, is going to be presented once again, this time in London, with Georgia Jagger (yes, Mick and Jerry Hall's daughter) reading the part of Alice in Wonderland (yes, Alice Wonderland figures into the manifesto, which is sorta written as a play). Says Westwood of this trip down the rabbit hole, "If you follow it your life will change." [Vogue UK]
• Infamous footwear designer Manolo Blahnik has been made a Commander of the British Empire by the Queen of England. For his great contributions to giving women across the land major foot problems? [Vogue UK]
• Model Karen Elson just gave birth to her second child and has already been shot as the face of the new BCBG ad campaign. How do these woman look so damn put together this soon after giving birth? To the spawn of Jack White, nonetheless? [FabSugar]
• See Chloe Sevigny as the face of Chloe fragrance here. [Sassybella]
• Aw, we have tears in our eyes: Donna Karan, Zac Posen, and Diane von Furstenberg are all going to work the cash register at the 7th on Sale event (lots of shopping, benefits AIDS patients) this weekend. [NYP]
• Nike is selling off its low-end brand Starter. [WSJ]
• Liz Lange maternity has also gone all private equity on us blah blah and sold a majority share of its company off blah blah. Meaning that now banker types can not only knock their wives up but clothe them on the cheap too? [WSJ]
• And lingerie line Agent Provocateur was just sold to a private equity firm too. [Independent]

• OMG! International Herald Tribune fashion critic Suzy Menkes and designer Marc Jacobs have somehow settled their seemingly-insurmountable differences! After their tiff in New York over Marc's really late fashion show, Marc left Menkes a Marc Jacobs T-shirt with a pretty bow on her seat at Louis Vuitton on Sunday. And what was on the T-shirt? A "love letter," says Marc. Coy! [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• But! Newsweek writer Dana Thomas, author of new luxury industry expose Deluxe: How Luxury Lost Its Luster, is now banned from Louis Vuitton after riding them particularly hard in her book about how luxury sucks now that it's all about logo-strewn accessories and crap. Good grief, couldn't LV just laugh all the way to the bank about shit like this? [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Says Chloe Sevigny about being the face of the new Chloe fragrance: "I'm concerned that the customers might be confused, though; I have the umlaut in my name while they have the accent. I'm Chloë, not Chloé." Stop. Even if you're kidding? Stop. [Fashion Week Daily]

• Le sigh! Kirsten Dunst is, like, so over getting harassed at fashion shows for being so irresistibly fabulous. Kiki says that "Fashion shows really aren't my forte anymore" but somehow mustered the courage to go to the Chanel show anyway since, like, she was already in Paris. Her verdict? "Hey, it wasn't so bad. Maybe they had better security than other shows." [Fashion Week Daily]
• If you care about what editors think you'll be wearing this spring now that the Spring/Summer 2008 shows haveended (we know — you're thrilled), you can read here. Or you can, uh, just continue to wear whatever the fuck you want. [Vogue UK]
• Samuel L. Jackson: "I love fashion TV... Those of us who are comfortable in our maleness can appreciate fashion." [Vogue UK]
• Michelle Pfeiffer has never tweezed her eyebrows? My ass. [FabSugar]
• MTV is introducing a new online TV show following the lives of up-and-coming fashion designers. as they prepare for the MAGIC apparel trade show in Las Vegas, which is like the Fashion Week of shit people actually wear, not that that makes it any less ridiculous. Stars include renaissance DJ Steve Aoki. [WWD, 3rd item]
• It finally happened: Fashion blog Coutorture got bought out by Sugar Inc., which we hope means a name change to "TortureSugar." [WWD, 2nd item]
• Sex and the City costume designer (and longtime drag queen employer) Patricia Field swears she wasn't trying to shove Carrie Bradshaw-style down all our throats. "I'm just declaring it so. I know I look like I have a crystal ball or gypsy tea, but I don't." [WWD, 4th item]
• You know what irritates us even more than a brand getting celebrities to design a limited-edition version of a product? When a brand gets celebrities to design a limited-edition version of a product that's not even on sale! The offenders this time? French ballet slipper company Repetto. 30 designers (Chloe Sevigny, Jean Paul Gaultier). 30 pairs of ballerina shoes. On tour for your viewing pleasure. You know, because the Frick is so boring at this point. [WWD, 1st item]
• And on that note! The inhouse DJ of YSL, Balenciaga, Chanel, etc. is also a designer. His name is Michel Gaubert, and he "collaborated" with Longchamp on a collection of bags. [WWD, 4th item]

Worried that Alexander McQueen's show, a tribute to his friend and champion, Isabella Blow, was going to be bathed in bathos? Well it turns out that McQueen, who showed in Paris over the weekend, had the collection of the season, or so sayeth the critics. Those same critics were less kind to Nina Ricci and Chloe - except for Suzy Menkes, who seems to love everyone except sworn enemy Marc Jacobs. Below, the major fashion critics take on McQueen, Ricci, Chloe and John Galliano.

"[Isabella] Blow is now with the angels" "emotional sensitivity of the show brought some beautiful homages" "unique pieces" McQueen's harsh attitude to women has not changed. Models struggled down the runway on teetering platforms. It is an inevitable part of his oeuvre that a woman will appear caged - even if the dress underneath is divine" —Suzy Menkes, International Herald Tribune

"[A] collection of outrageous beauty" "all a vivid reminder of Blow's eccentric, stylish wardrobe." —Hilary Alexander, The Telegraph

"McQueen mustered the clarity to dispense with smoke and mirrors and show his capabilities in cut, drape, and feathered flourish to an audience near enough to inspect every detail" "his romantic fairy-goddess chiffons put him back in the game of current trend" "McQueen honored his mentor by striving to bring out the best in himself" - Sarah Mower, Style.com


Nina Ricci:
"[A] listless collection that didn't suggest a clear plan" "he achieved... wreckage" "dirty colors" "jackets that looked lifted from a mud room" "stringy hair dangling with feathers" "[b]ut other designers have done the same" "isn't very far from what a cool girl is wearing now" —Cathy Horyn, The New York Times

"Nina Ricci has never been so beautifully realized" "a perfume of a collection that hit a modern spot between romantic and sugary" "combining a youthful stride" —Suzy Menkes, International Herald Tribune

"[A] particularly poetic state of dishevelment" "smudged by the murky first light of a city day" "a reassertion of his Belgian identity" "deciding to take the path of underground edginess rather than Parisian chic" "what he's doing for day is the thing to watch" - Sarah Mower, Style.com


John Galliano:
"Mr. Galliano's style is romantic and narrative, typically with an impoverished muse at the center" "for once the models looked happy in their outfits and nobody complained that they were too thin" "looked fresh" "light and friendly" —Cathy Horyn, The New York Times

"Everything in John Galliano's garden was lovely" "However much the designer plants new ideas and changes the landscape (this time it was a carousel and fairground) the effect is always much the same" "this was just Galliano light" "sweet but never cloying" —Suzy Menkes, International Herald Tribune

"Here all was softness, frills, retro bias-cuts and gentle pastels, with the emphasis on roses; printed on chiffon, appliquéd in silk and half-hidden within the folds of a ruffled peplum." —Hilary Alexander, The Telegraph

"[A] gamely dizzy performance of typical Galliano-esque high jinks" "Galliano is motoring on reinterpretations of his classics" "it happens that this is a season in which that looks right" "the narrative wasn't a groundbreaker, merely a device for trotting out Galliano's standard pretty, printed, flouncy dresses" "Galliano is still in the game" —Sarah Mower, Style.com


Chloe:
"But could Mr. Andersson have starved his hungry audience more? The shapes in the collection were so undefined, so indistinct that you had the feeling the same dress was going by again and again" —Cathy Horyn, The New York Times

"It seemed smart to take Chloé back to its roots - while still pushing forward. It has most recently been pitched as a brand for women who want to stay forever innocent on the cusp of maidenhood and maturity" "...this season proved that [designer Paulo Andersson] is not trapped in that vision." —Suzy Menkes, International Herald Tribune

"[R]etro-cuteness cauterized by an intrinsic graphic modernity" "something fresh" "a few rare thoughts about how to make transparency passable on a daily basis" "there was a lot of repetition" "reverted, in a contemporary way, to the old-time Chloé of the early seventies, when Karl Lagerfeld [designed it]" - Sarah Mower, Style.com

• Diane von Furstenberg on designer Marc Jacobs' we-think-idle threat to stop showing his precious dresses in New York: "It would be really horrible to lose him... I am ready to beg in front of his pavement." [WWD]
  
• Terry Richardson just shot Tom Ford for the cover of Out. It's boxing-themed because it'll shock the world! [Page Six]
  
• Ann Taylor: The Jeffersons of retail! Movin' on up, pricepoint-wise. (Because nothing says "expensive" like expensive!) And also to the East side, with a new space on New York's Madison Avenue. [WSJ]
  
• Oh, brother: in the neverending high-low war H&M looks like the new Forever21. Now the "copyright" is Chloe's, and the beef isn't even with actual clothes but with the H&M ad campaign, supposedly "virtually identical" to Chloe's own. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• New York Fashion Week! It's finally over! Oh no: London Fashion Week. It's just beginning. [Vogue UK]

• <<li>Bulgari profits are up a crazy 32%: Who is buying that much Bulgari? And what are they buying? We can't even name a single Bulgari product other than that Green Tea shampoo that we got as a sample in a hotel once. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Calvin Klein designer Francisco Costa is just like us: Stopped by security when trying to get backstage after fashion shows. [Fashion Week Daily]
• How Anne Klein designer Isabel Toldeo is going to be recovering from Fashion Week: "We head out to the San Francisco area where my husband is painting a large scale mural - and for the opening of Barneys - and then it's on to a Big Sur getaway where we are staying on a cliff to watch the fall fog roll in - very Play Misty For Me." Uh, yeah. Us too. [The Fashion Informer]
• Yohji Yamamoto is creating "his youngest and most affordable" line to date, which is getting the moniker "Coming Soon." Just us, or does this name make you think of lies you tell men in bed? [Um yeah just you -Moe] [WWD, sub req'd]

• Juliette Lewis and her band, The Licks, are the new face of Costume National's spring advertising campaign. We'd much prefer it if the brand was being shilled by the rap group "Tha Liks," also known as "Tha Alkaholiks," but whatev. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Gayest item ever: Anderson Cooper, the fragrance. Brought to you by Tom Ford. [Janet Charlton's Hollywood]
  
• Levi's, which is already suing Polo Ralph Lauren and most Japanese premium denim labels for copyright infringement, continues its quest to get anyone who manufactures pants from denim to send it royalty checks by suing Abercrombie & Fitch. Stay real, guys! [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Things we did not know: Republican fundraiser Georgette Mosbacher: (sorta) besties with Luca Orlandi (of Luca Luca). [Who the fuck is that? -Moe] [WWD, sub req'd]

• Nicky Hilton's clothing line offers fashion from a "global elite" perspective. Barf. [Fashion & Beauty Romania]
• The race is on already to see if Patricia Field can one-up her own deleteriously influential work dressing everyone on Sex and the City by dressing everyone on the upcoming Lucy Liu vehicle Cashmere Mafia Guess what? No. [FabSugar]
• More fun with copyright infringement: Topshop must destroy 1000 yellow denim dresses that bear an uncanny resemblance to, uh, a yeallow denim dress shown by Chloe during the resort season. They also had to pay some money in a settlement moderated by a court that has better things to do but on the other hand at least isn't making new abortion laws. [Vogue UK]
• We will apologize to British people for making them care about what Angelina Jolie is wearing, if they apologize to us for Victoria Beckham and Sienna Miller. [Vogue UK]

[from L to R, an additional look by Chloe, and 2 by Missoni]

• The long-anticipated sale of luxury department store Barneys New York finally went down this weekend, going to a Dubai-based investment firm for $832 million and making for what was probably the smoothest Middle Eastern negotiation in modern history. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Now that Barneys is owned by Arabs, however, does this mean Jews will take their luxury shopping elsewhere? [Portfolio]
  
• The European couture shows start July 2, and three design houses (Dior, Lacroix, Valentino) are duking it out for "fashion party to end all fashion parties" status. [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Sinead O'Connor "gives a crap" about fashion. Way to pick a profile subject, WWD! [WWD, sub req'd]

• Limited Brands to lay off 10% of its corporate employees. [WWD, sub req'd]
• Fashion industry enfant terrible Jean-Paul Gaultier will be recognized for his bad boy ways as the honoree at this year's Fashion Group International's Night of Stars, whose theme this year is "The Rule Breakers." Metaphysical question of the day: If you're being honored as a rule breaker, does that mean you are no longer a rule breaker? [Vogue UK]
• Metaphysical question of the day, II: What came first, the pretty shoes or the ugly feet? Victoria Beckham has some bad-looking feet, which may or may not be the result of the pretty shoes she likes to wear. [AHN]

These two are so fucking rad, man, they've just done a gram of coke each and are five minutes away from shagging that man with the paunch and the spotty back over there in the corner, and they'll wake up and shoot up and drag themselves back to their Willamsburg loft where they'll hang out with lots of people who are thinner and more interesting than you.

"I am strangely, terribly greasy. You wish to embrace me, but I will just slide out of your arms with my shiny greasiness. I am tempted to roll in the conveniently nearby sand and exfoliate my dampness away, but that would detract from my sweaty beautifulness. So I shall stand here next to this wall instead."

"Why? Why is my hair so red and spiky? I am shocked!"

"Get your stupid fucking handbag off me, bitch."

Haha! I spit on your stupid size zero you fat ugly cows!

This girl will stomp up and down your naked back in her death-defying shoes, before crushing your head between her pneumatic buttocks with demented glee. Then she will feast on your brains.

Versace in deal to design, furnish Versace brand helicopters. "It costs so much we are not even saying how much," says the company's CEO. That Donatella! Always known for her understated, tactful humility! [WWD]

New Chloe designer (and former Lego champion) Paulo Andersson says his collection is based on the idea "of a girl who steals from her mother". We knew we were destined to become a fashion muse! [WWD]

Nicole Miller CEO Bud Konheim criticizes the Times' Cathy Horyn for incorrect pronunciation of "Lanvin" and "jodphurs"; seems to have no qualms about being referred to as "Bud". [WWD]

The top 5 fall collections viewed online, according to Women's Wear Daily: Marc Jacobs, Michael Kors, Oscar de la Renta, Zac Posen. The bottom 5? Let's just say we're not surprised the list includes Vera Wang. [WWD]

Jessica Biel disappears from the front row of Stella McCartney's show. [People]