@Crabby Cakes wants some Dance Biscuits.: They don't flatter me either, but mostly because I have no boobs. You have to have at least a little cleavage to keep the neckline in place and all I have is a large expanse of ribcage. Pinning the neckline doesn't work and just looks odd so I've given up.
I'd like a flatter belly too, but mine has more to do with margarita consumption and I'm not feeling up to giving up the alcohol.
@Crabby Cakes wants some Dance Biscuits.: I have the Buddha belly and the tiny boobage. Wrap dresses are out, as are under-the-bust hemlines. I tried on the prettiest holiday top the other day with one of those hemlines, and I looked like I was 6 months pregnant. Ugh.
I meant to comment on the Michelle Obama post before, but forgot, so I'll say it here. The best pick up line/compliment I ever got was "Did anyone ever tell you you got a figure like a sister?" (The way he said it, "figure" and "sister" ended with an "uh" sound, it was brilliant.) I'm white, but I have an ample booty.
Ok, so I don't think that talking about Michelle's behind is all that relevant, but I like the fact that I have that in common with her. She's sophisticated and classy, and it just shows that all body types and sizes are beautiful.
One ball sadness. My husband may have the testicular cancer, and he is uninsured. Now we're trying to get the insurance so we can afford to figure out what the fuck, and if he's gonna have to get a unilateral lopitoffamy, or worse...
@MeganGlass: Just to let you know that testicular cancer is not a death sentence. My BEST friend had it, and now has two beautiful sons a few years later and is doing great (with one testicle). Keep the faith!!! Big hugs!!!
@JazzednJersey: Thanks. The fact that it's very survivable is helping, although we don't know for sure yet that this is what it is. Though it's at the top of the list of suspects. Guess we'll find out soon...
And, alright, to make up for my last comment, here is an on-topic comment:
1. No one judges one-balled dudes. Three-balled dudes, however......
2. Photo editors keep a selection of belly buttons on file so they can digitally add one to KK's photographs. Because not having a belly button is the grossest thing ever.
3. Michelle Obama's J Crew Letterman top is sold out on J Crew. I hope they sent her a thank you note or some free clothes.
4. Vampires like blood, not fat.
5. Chivalry is simply being kind. And those of you who disagree can kiss my fat ass.
6. I hope when I am 60+ I will be using a vibrator. While drinking a dry martini, of course. Also, Carrie Fisher rocks.
7. Wrap dresses are flattering on some, not on others. Kind of like everything.
8. The VS fashion show.....I don't really have words for that.
9. I am so glad it's Friday. And I don't feel like working, which is why I just wrote this incredibly long comment.
I'm still trying to picture Debbie Reynolds giving ANYONE a vibrator for Christmas. Or for any other gifting occasion, for that matter. My brain is balking at the mere suggestion.
@Gretchen: I'm trying to imagine how mortified I'd have been if my mom gave me a vibrator for a gift when I was 15... it'd still be kind of horrible now that I'm 31.
I am little confused that the Event That May Not Be Named hasn't been mentioned yet. Also, I am surprised that there was no post on the 30th anniversary of Jonestown this week, unless I missed it. And YES I sent a link into the tip line...
@Anna: Clinton as Secretary of State, I think. NYTimes has it up on the Caucus blog but no official confirmation from Obama's or Clinton's camp yet, from what I know.
I know this post is from yesterday, but I witnessed something disgraceful this morning on my ride to work. Picture an extremely crowded metro car because of massive train delays and numerous men sitting in the too few seats. Also picture a woman and her infant and no man offering his seat. I was far enough back that I didn't realize she had the baby with her until I was almost at my stop. I was going to say something but then she got off.
#1 is my pet peeve! I take the bus to/from work every day and the men (mostly 20's and 30's) don't give up their seat for those truly in need, much less an able-bodied woman (heels or no).
I've taken to offering their seats on their behalf (while I stand nearby) to old ladies and women with small children. The recipients are always appreciative, and the men are, I hope, at least a little bit shamed.
Man, am I not getting a joke or something? I don't understand why, and this isn't only on here I think I've seen it crop up on one or two other feminist focused sites, there's an expectation voiced that it's the guy's job to pay for dinner. I don't understand how that could possibly be justified. Like, shouldn't stuff like that be based on a case by case basis (contingent on salary, whose turn it is, special occasion, sudden windfall)? I've heard the argument that it's because women take so much longer to get ready. But, isn't that also a sex based generalization?
@AlabamaWorley: Yes, it is a sex-based generalization and, like everything, is true for some people and not for others. I mean, I take longer/put more effort into/spend more money getting ready than my dude does when we go anywhere, but I'm absolutely baffled as to how anybody would think that entitles me to anything.
I think everything should be determined on a case-by-case basis, which is why I think lists of "rules," even if joking, are lame if not potentially dangerous. Hell, I disagree with the entire list above -- I don't want anyone's seat and if my shoes hurt it's my problem; I rarely take cabs and don't give a rat's ass who gets in first; I like to split expenses reasonably equally; don't "cum" on me at all but if you do (WTF?) I'll take care of it myself; manicures are lame. To each her own, you know? If a dude is into you, he can figure out what you like or YOU CAN TELL HIM. Groundbreaking!
@MrsChuckBass: Imagine my shock on finding out that I have a wife and she does not wish to experience the manly deluge of Chuck Bass on her great golden acreage. What a day!
i want the guy to pay for dinner because it costs more money to be me than it does to be him. clothes, tights, bras, tampons, facials, manicures, haircuts, makeup, handbags, shoes, face cream, waxing. i know i don't NEED to buy all these things. but if a guy wants to go out with me he NEEDS to subsidize that with food.
I have one word: Amen. Am I a crappy feminist? So be it. I work bloody hard every day, am a great mom, and am like Rachael freaking Ray in the damn kitchen. Yes, I expect to be treated like a lady and as if I'm special.
Not to say that my way is better or whatever -- it's just how my brain works!
11/21/08
Also, I would like it to be FLATTER and FLATTERED. That would make my day.
11/21/08
I'd like a flatter belly too, but mine has more to do with margarita consumption and I'm not feeling up to giving up the alcohol.
11/21/08
@anastasia beaverhousen: You may have saved me from going to every holiday party in a black sack with this suggestion. Thank you!
11/21/08
11/21/08
Ok, so I don't think that talking about Michelle's behind is all that relevant, but I like the fact that I have that in common with her. She's sophisticated and classy, and it just shows that all body types and sizes are beautiful.
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
So he's at least staying sane about it. If it's the big C, it's at least curable, as opposed to treatable.
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
1. No one judges one-balled dudes. Three-balled dudes, however......
2. Photo editors keep a selection of belly buttons on file so they can digitally add one to KK's photographs. Because not having a belly button is the grossest thing ever.
3. Michelle Obama's J Crew Letterman top is sold out on J Crew. I hope they sent her a thank you note or some free clothes.
4. Vampires like blood, not fat.
5. Chivalry is simply being kind. And those of you who disagree can kiss my fat ass.
6. I hope when I am 60+ I will be using a vibrator. While drinking a dry martini, of course. Also, Carrie Fisher rocks.
7. Wrap dresses are flattering on some, not on others. Kind of like everything.
8. The VS fashion show.....I don't really have words for that.
9. I am so glad it's Friday. And I don't feel like working, which is why I just wrote this incredibly long comment.
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
I NEVER say "you should have posted about this" OR "scoop" the editors, but shit....I mean....COME ON.
I feel like I've been on the cusp of a really good orgasm since 11am.
11/21/08
Oh wait. Were you talking about filthy commie liberals or Jezeditors?
11/21/08
11/21/08
/kidding, please don't take my vowels, Hortense!
But seriously, it's not even on CNN's radar. They can't possibly wait till Monday, can they?
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
11/21/08
No wait, that's Jed.
Touche.
11/19/08
11/19/08
11/18/08
I've taken to offering their seats on their behalf (while I stand nearby) to old ladies and women with small children. The recipients are always appreciative, and the men are, I hope, at least a little bit shamed.
Manners: ur doin' it wrong.
11/18/08
11/18/08
I think everything should be determined on a case-by-case basis, which is why I think lists of "rules," even if joking, are lame if not potentially dangerous. Hell, I disagree with the entire list above -- I don't want anyone's seat and if my shoes hurt it's my problem; I rarely take cabs and don't give a rat's ass who gets in first; I like to split expenses reasonably equally; don't "cum" on me at all but if you do (WTF?) I'll take care of it myself; manicures are lame. To each her own, you know? If a dude is into you, he can figure out what you like or YOU CAN TELL HIM. Groundbreaking!
11/18/08
Or in (re: the mouth, b/c I always use condoms whilst having intercourse so it doesn't matter)
Who's with me?
11/18/08
11/18/08
Hee.
11/18/08
11/18/08
1. Open jars for me.
2. Carry heavy furniture for me.
3. Reach things that are on the top shelves.
4. Occasional sex and backrubs.
Everything else I can do myself.
11/18/08
works for female tall, strong friends too:
4. Occasional sex and backrubs.
As a tall, strong female, all I gotta say is this: sigh. if only.
11/18/08
11/18/08
If we know you and don't offer you a seat (i'm assuming you're talking about the subway) then yes, we're acting like a schmuck.
If we don't know you then you're on your own. you chose to wear heels. you can vulture for a seat to free up just like the rest of us.
I only give seats to the elderly.
11/18/08
11/18/08
Not to say that my way is better or whatever -- it's just how my brain works!