[Malibu, November 11. Image via x17.]

• Michael and Dina Lohan will work together on getting Lindsay Lohan off of pills. Says Michael Lohan. [Radar Online]

• Papa Lohan says of Lindsay: "Her problem is prescription drug use. I've seen pictures of her in Paris, and she looks totally out of it. There are morons hanging around her, and they have their hands on my daughter." [Gatecrasher]
• But! Dina Lohan says: "I don't go — like my ex — on national television and make things up. He's estranged from Lindsay; he doesn't know what's going on in her life. Michael doesn't talk to her. "I've had full custody of all my children for the last 10 years. He has been incarcerated for some of that time, so whatever is going on in Lindsay's personal life is our business. And for him getting paid to say things about her when he's five months behind in child support is wrong." Oh, and re: Ungaro, Dina sniffs: "The critics can say whatever they want, but Lindsay is a genius." [Page Six]
• "Leave Lindsay alone. Let her be a real 23-year-old. Let her grow, and let her artistic abilities flourish. Stop judging the Britneys and the Lindsays. They are very creative girls, and that is a gift from a higher power of God."— Dina Lohan. [Page Six]
• Dr. Conrad Murray, Michael Jackson's personal physician, may face arrest — and could lose his medical license — after missing a late child support hearing. [NY Post]
• "The CBS producer accused of blackmailing David Letterman was convinced the comic king bedded 'six or seven' female staffers, a pal of the newsman said Thursday." [NY Daily News]
• A chimpanzee was supposed to be a guest judge on Dancing With The Stars on Tuesday, but PETA complained. This is not a joke. [NY Post]
• Nicole Kidman has teamed up with Omega watches — she signed watch boxes to benefit the United Nations Development Fund for Women. Fifty percent of the proceeds of the watch sales will go to UNIFEM. [WWD]
• Jon Gosselin didn't leave the twins' birthday party at 6pm — he stayed to put his kids to bed. And he was cordial to Kate. But did not spend the night. [TMZ, People]
• You know how Jon Gosselin brought a misspelled birthday cake (it's "Mady", not "Maddy") to his kids' birthday party? Well it was sort of an insult to Kate, who was making a cake from scratch. [BBC News]
• Mischa Barton was spotted buying rounds of shots for Ryan Ross — formerly of Panic At The Disco; currently in Young Veins. [Gatecrasher]
• Mischa Barton was spotted getting out a cab in front of a bar, yelling "I need a drink!" Been there. [Page Six]
• Uh-oh, Nicolas Cage owes over six million dollars in unpaid taxes. Uncle Sam doesn't like that. [TMZ]
• Dr. Phil is denying that he forced a woman to stare at a naked man and grabbed her breast. [TMZ]
• Hilary Swank walks around naked in front of her boyfriend's son. "You wonder at what age you should stop walking around nude," she admits. "But he doesn't look twice. He doesn't think about it yet." Really? He's 6 years old. [Gatecrasher via Marie Claire]
• Khloe Kardashian will now be known as Khloe Kardashian Odom. Adjust accordingly. [Page Six]
• Robin Williams will do his stand up act, Weapons Of Self Destruction, in NYC in November, his first show since having heart surgery. [NY Daily News]
• LOL: Woody Harrelson gets his zombie punchlines from Paul McCartney. [NY Post]
• Mya's dress split at a party; she used safety pins and staples to cobble it back together. Stars are just like us! [Page Six]
• "The husband of Danielle Staub from "Real Housewives of New Jersey" claims she strait up lied when she called him a rapist and a dog murderer ... and now he's suing her for defamation." [TMZ]
• At the link is a recap and insider report and blow-by-blow account of Jeremy Piven's Broadway drama/Speed-the-Plow meltdown. [NY Times]
• Kylie Minogue will do a residency in Vegas? Makes total sense. [Mirror]
• Speaking of Kylie: her ex-boyfriend Olivier Martinez has accepted undisclosed libel damages over a claim that he had cheated on her during their long-term relationship. The Sun apparently makes stuff up. [The Star]
• Breaking: Audrina Patridge is single and happy. [People]
• Kristen Bell will star as Christina Aguilera's rival in Burlesque, a musical drama about "a small-town girl with a big-town voice who finds love and success in a neo-burlesque club." You guys, Cher plays the club owner. CHER. [Hollywood Reporter]
• On the Wanda Sykes HBO special: "She is… the funniest person in America… Sykes gets the crowd laughing early and keeps them laughing to the end, with no significant down time and no cheap tricks… [It] all builds to a prolonged, brilliant segment on being gay and black that puts a racial spin on every coming-out cliché- making us see both with new eyes." [USA Today]
• "Filmmaker Steven Spielberg, long recognized for his artistic achievements, was honored with the Liberty Medal on Thursday for his compassion and humanitarian work." [AP]
• Parker Posey has joined the cast of Highland Park, a dark comedy with Danny Glover. The film focuses on the high school faculty in a struggling community. In the story, a teacher wins the lottery and uses the cash to restore the local library; the film is actually attempting to help reopen a real library in Detroit. [Hollywood Reporter]
• "Thursday's episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta took a dark turn. Following the news of the death of Anthony "AJ" Jewel outside his Atlanta strip club last week, viewers watched his then-fiancée, Housewife Kandi Burruss, waver about the future of their relationship - awkwardly unaware, as the cameras rolled, that the relationship had no future." [People]
• Isaiah Washington: Still looking for jobs. Sources say it's not because of the Grey's fallout, but because he is difficult to work with. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Gloria Estefan bought 2,000 tickets for her concert in Puerto Rico this weekend and will distribute them via raffle among 17,000 recently laid-off government workers. [AP]
• Gladys Knight is embarking on a farewell tour? Is she taking a midnight train? [Independent]
• "I'm in 'Gay Paris' — I swear as an Englishman that by the time I leave tomorrow it'll be known as 'Hetero Paris.' Or at least Bi Paris." — Russell Brand. [NY Daily News]
• "I was always thinking 'how am I going to keep my old chap in my pants?' But Ayda and me are very loved up – sprogs on the way and all that business. I don't know what will go on down the road, but I don't want to do anything to fuck it up or do anything to upset her." — Robbie Williams on gf Ayda Field. [Telegraph]
• "My dad went into a rant. Farrah came flying at him to defend herself, he blocked her and, in the process, broke her arm. They spun the truth to protect Ryan (but) I was there, I saw it happen." — Griffin O'Neal says his father Ryan O'Neal cheated on Farrah Fawcett and was abusive. [Daily Express]
• "It's obviously very strange, a little mad. Especially the [Audrey] Hepburn comparisons. I mean, that's such a lovely thing to say about the film, and I see it in the Paris montage. But you know, I didn't think about the end product much when I was making it. I just thought, what fun! There's Emma Thompson! I had to fight for this part; I auditioned three times and must have called my agent every day for two months afterwards. I knew it was a special gang going in, but I just thought…oh, I have to play Jenny. Her journey is enormous." — Carey Mulligan on all the buzz her performance in new film An Education is getting, in which she plays "a fiercely intelligent teenage girl living in barely pre-Beatles London." [The Daily Beast]
• "It's fucking weird. I'll be the first to admit that New York is one of the greatest cities in the world. But what you see on screen is not the life we really lead." — Gossip Girl's Penn Badgley, who likes taco stands, not fancy restaurants. [BlackBook]
• "The only expert thing I know about a relationship is that I don't know anything. I think every time I think I know something, obviously you then learn that you don't know anything, but I do know this to be true: I know that men marry women hoping that they will not change, and women marry men hoping that they will change, and inevitably, everyone's disappointed." — Vince Vaughn. [Independent]
• "Younger guys are generally more adventurous, not set in their ways. I don't like guys my age because they are normally either married or divorced and grumpy, fat and balding." — Madonna. [Daily Express]

• Handbag model Lily Allen performed live at the farming-themed, hay-strewn Chanel show this morning. [Fashionista]
• Claudia Schiffer has formally announced she will no longer do any runway modeling. She plans to fill her downtime with a trip to Iraq. [Sun]

• Marc Jacobs' and Viacom's flacks have denied the reports that Marc Jacobs and Lorenzo Martone are to appear on a gay version of the Real Housewives for the Logo network. [CityFile]
• Vera Wang, however, says bring on the cameras. "I'm doing a TV show. It's coming. I don't know when, or how, but it's coming," said the designer at the National Arts Awards. Wang, seated at the table of collector Julie Minskoff, said she doesn't buy art because she can't afford it. But if money were no object, "I would buy Tom Sachs, because I like Hello Kitty. And the guy who does all the pills, because I take them all." Should make for some interesting viewing, then. [StyleFile]
• A Puma branded mobile phone: It's happening sometime next spring. [WWD]
• Ever phlegmatic Vogue editor Grace Coddington, on fans now recognizing her in the street: "It's probably a short-lived thing. There will be another fashion movie and another person who comes out from that." [Grazia]
• During the Givenchy show, someone stole Coddington's purse from her chauffeured car while the driver apparently napped. [NYDN]
• Prince turned up at the Yves Saint Laurent show in a gold sequined suit he designed himself. [WWD]
• The only odd thing about this sweet article on the art show Rodarte is curating in Paris: who is this documentary crew that's mentioned in passing, and why have they been following the Mulleavy sisters for four years? [NYTimes]
• Actress Ashley Judd is releasing a perfume, of which she says, "Beloved Red Rose captures the essence of love." Not that she'd be an objective source on that or anything. [People]
• Meanwhile, Tamara Mellon's Jimmy Choo has signed a 12-year fragrance licensing contract. So expect a Jimmy Choo scent soon. [WWD]
• The reason Celine had a lag of 13 months between confirming Phoebe Philo as its new creative director and actually giving her a catwalk show is apparently not because the LVMH overlords' were given pause by anything Philo did — it's simply that 2009 was marked off as "Transition Year" in Marco Gobbetti's calendar, and spring 2010, well, that's a whole ball game. [Reuters]
• French Connection is closing it s21 stores in Japan. The retailer lost $16.8 million in the first six months of this year. [WWD]
• Cher and Bob Mackie are at it again, creating costumes out of rhinestones, nude tricot, and feathers for the star's Caesar's Palace show in Vegas. What else would you expect? [People]
• Juergen Teller is working on a book of nude photographs of Raquel Zimmerman and Charlotte Rampling at the Louvre. [WWD]
• Ellen Tracy is taking its sportswear slightly downmarket. From this spring onwards, its wares will cost $50-$149. The brand has signed an exclusive distributorship deal with Macy's. [Crain's]
• For those who wish they could be Don Draper: A limited run of 250 suits inspired by Mad Men will be sold at Brooks Brothers starting October 19th. [WWD]
• Pierre Bergé, Yves Saint Laurent's life and business partner, says he received death threats and was accompanied by bodyguards following his decision to auction two Qing dynasty bronzes from his and Saint Laurent's art collection that China wanted repatriated. [Reuters]
• Chef Marcus Samuelsson, television chef Giada de Laurentiis, and Zac Posen are cooking this weekend for a $325-a-head event at the Food Network New York City Wine & Food Festival. Samuelsson muses on the similarities between professional cooking and fashion design: "I've been backstage at a fashion show, and it's like a kitchen. It's a very similar energy." Posen, a home cook, says Martha Stewart and Jacques Pépin saved his life. "I was a very depressed middle-school student and I watched [those shows] avidly, and then Martha Stewart changed my life. Her first cookbook [Entertaining] was given to my mom, but I took it." WWD even re-prints Samuelsson's maple-glazed salmon and couscous recipe. [WWD]
• Renzo Rosso, the Diesel founder who owns Maison Martin Margiela, has confirmed that the rarely seen Belgian designer, rumored to have departed his namesake house, has been gone for "a long time." Instead, Margiela is "here but not here. We have a new fresh design team on board." This season's collection, just shown in Paris, was rated a disappointment by the fashion press, who would like to see a successor named. Haider Ackerman and Raf Simons are rumored to be under consideration, but anyone named would have to design the label anonymously. [Vogue UK]
• Roland Mouret: Just another designer broadcasting his show live on the Internet. [WWD]
• Some Very Important Designer forgot his ticket to Viktor & Rolf and nearly had to stand with the hoi polloi! [Fashionista]
• The Clean Clothes Campaign is pressuring Europe's biggest retailers, like Tesco, Aldi, and Carrefour, to institute a common guaranteed minimum wage for garment workers across Asia. Its lofty goal? Assuring that the people who make the clothes we wear are paid $475 a month and get a 48-hour workweek. You can e-mail retailers via the Campaign's website. [WWD]

• Michael Lohan says Jon Gosselin is trying to get out of his TLC contract to appear on his new show Divorced Dads Club and hinted that a few famous former sports stars/single dads may be joining them.

• Lohan says of Jon's relationship with TLC, "There's bad blood there. If your show was making the network $130 something million and they paid you the pittance they paid you and restricted you from doing so many different things, how would you feel?" adding that the producers of Divorced Dads Club are, "reaching out to Dennis Rodman. I know Jose Canseco has already said yes, he wants to be part of the show that bad. There are even some divorced celebrities who are not dads who want to do the show." [Radar Online]
• In Croatia Jay-Z and Beyonce were having dinner by the ocean when their body guard started fighting with a paparazzo. The photographer threw his tripod at the body guard, so he threw it in the ocean. There's video: [TMZ]
• Dr. Conrad Murray will be arrested for the death of Michael Jackson and charged with manslaughter in the next two weeks according to a law enforcement source. MJ's dermatologist Dr. Arnold Klein will also be arrested and charged with medical malpractice. [Fox News]
• The doctor who performed the in vitro fertilization procedure in Celine Dion that resulted in her second pregnancy says he implanted an embryo that had been kept frozen in liquid nitrogen for the past eight years. The embryo was frozen while she was going through IVF to conceive her first child René-Charles in 2001. [People]
• A friend of Samantha Burke says she met Jude Law in a New York club. "He was sick, so she kept going to his hotel over the course of a week to take care of him." But Jude wasn't all that grateful. "Jude didn't even remember her. She hasn't seen him since New York. They've only been in contact through their lawyers," says the friend, who added that she thinks Samantha's crazy to keep the baby and that she may be looking for money because "her family doesn't have any money." [E!]
• A "family friend" says Chaz Bono is planning to conceive a child with his fiance Jennifer Elia after his gender reassignment surgery is complete and Cher has volunteered to help them find a sperm donor. "Cher doesn't care if the baby is a boy or girl, but she's insisting on a donor with intelligence, creativity and good looks," says the source. [National Enquirer]
• Sheryl Crow sold her music catalogue to fund affiliated with an Australian bank. She'll get a smaller cut of the royalties, but the group will promote her copyrighted material to movie houses and advertisers. [WSJ]
• A source says Jason Trawick hasn't broken up with Britney Spears. "Things are fine – they still maintain a great working relationship and he's in her life as a great friend as he's always been," said the source, "Things are casual … Britney really listens to what he has to say. He's been with her a long time, he gets along with the family. He has her best interests at heart, and he cares about her." [People]
• The LAPD has issued a statement saying someone gave them the nude Eric Dane/Rebecca Gayheart tape that "could link celebrities engaging in illegal activity... The LAPD was in the process of reviewing the voluminous files contained on the DVD when the story was leaked to the media. No determination has been made as to whether or not the DVD contained any information that could be used for a criminal investigation. Some of the information contained on the DVD included archived articles and photographs of porn stars and formally convicted madams, which could readily be found over the Internet." [Extra]
• Brad Pitt's former Thelma & Louise co-star Michael Madsen said, "Everybody's had enough of Brad Pitt. I've seen enough of him for a lifetime." It's possible he's mad at Brad for not getting him a role in The Assasination of Jesse James. [TMZ]
• Ugh, "internet personality" Justin Ross Lee, who previously shared pictures of Ashley Olsen he took on a flight sold video of Brad Pitt, who happened to wind up on another flight with him. [Star]
• Renee Zellweger and Bradley Cooper "get along really well and just kinda click," said a source, "Bradley likes the speed of everything. He likes that Reneé is low-key." [People]
• Renee Zellweger wore Carolina Herrera to the premiere of her movie My One And Only but Mark Randall, who plays her son, wore jeans with ripped knees and five year old Converse sneakers. "I decided to dress up a little tonight," he said. [N.Y. Observer]
• A group of Bulgarian Orthodox priests have asked Madonna to reschedule a concert scheduled for August 29 because it falls on St. John the Baptist day, when followers are supposed to refrain from "secular pleasures and merrymaking". [UPI]
• "I don't have a girlfriend," says Robert Pattinson, "I don't know why... You always think you're going to get more girls after you've made a movie and it never happens. You sit there and you're like, 'I'm a big movie star and I want to go out with some models,' but I don't know why that doesn't happen." [People]
• A friend says that Jasmine Flore, whose body was found in a suitcase and thrown in a dumpster over the weekend, had told her husband Ryan Alexander Jenkins of Megan Wants A Millionaire, that their relationship was over and was supposed to go to Las Vegas to reunite with an ex on the day her body was found. [TMZ]
• The ex, Robert Hasman, says he received a text from Jasmine Flore saying she was coming to see him, then another that said "suck it." Police suspect Ryan Jenkins may have seen the first message on his wife's phone and written the second. Jenkins reported Flore missing on Saturday night and is now MIA. [TMZ]
• Ryan Jenkins has a criminal record for assaulting a girlfriend in 2005. He was ordered to get treatment for sex addiction and domestic violence and serve 15 months probation. [TMZ]
• American Idol producers want Faith Hill to be a celebrity judge next season. [Radar Online]
• When Leighton Meester came to the studio to perform the vocals on Cobra Starship's "Good Girls Go Bad," "She like, turned the lights down low in the studio and lit a few candles to set the mood," says bassist Alex Suarez. "I've never seen candles in the studio before... So she's like, 'You make me want to lose control,' alone in the dark surrounded by vanilla and lavender, clenching her fist, just really feeling it." [People]
• Julianne Moore is selling her New York townhouse for $12 million and you can check out shots of her living room, kitchen, and bathroom here: [Fashion Week Daily]
• Jason Schwartzman married clothing designer Brady Cunningham on July 11 in the San Fernando Valley. "It was a very small ceremony with many family members and close friends," said his rep. [People]
• If you can't wait to hear the song Heidi Montag will perform at the Miss Universe pageant later this month, you can check it out at the link. Heidi says, "I am so excited to perform ... at Miss Universe for my first ever live performance... This is such a miracle in life and I give thanks to God everyday for this once in a lifetime opportunity." [People]
• Three women displaced by Hurricane Katrina have been charged with collecting rental assistance from FEMA after Oprah Winfrey helped them buy new homes through her Angel Network. [Reuters]
• George Lopez's family members are mad at him because he buried his grandma without telling them. "George buried our grandma and didn't tell any of us about it," said his sister Linda Sierra. "He didn't let any of us know — George's sisters, nephews and nieces are all heartbroken." [Radar Online]
• Philadelphia native Bill Cosby appeared at a news conference today with Pennsylvania Governor Ed Rendell to criticize Senate Republicans' plan to provide less money for schools than the Democratic governor has proposed. [AP]
• Possible Mad Men spoiler: Orestes Arcuni, who played the bell hop on Monday's episode, says, "The kissing and sex stuff is so technical that it only resembles something romantic when spliced and edited together. It took about four hours and about ten different camera set ups to shoot. The actors are not having a romantic experience, that's hopefully the result of good editing, a good story, and ultimately what the audience brings along with them to the viewing experience." [Gothamist]
• Katey Sagal, who is starring in the FX drama Sons of Anarchy says of there being more roles for actresses "of a certain age," "I don't know why it's changed, but I'm really grateful it has. Maybe it has to do with the fact that we're all living longer and suddenly it's okay to get older. Maybe there's a broader audience for these characters. The stories you can tell about older women are deeper. Plus, cable has opened up enormous possibilities. In feature films, you're still lucky if you're not the girlfriend or the wife. But I just read yesterday that Dianne Keaton is going to be on television now, she's doing a series with HBO, so TV is where our stories are being told." [CNN]

• As mentioned yesterday, after Perez Hilton insulted Fergie, Perez and Will.I.Am had a confrontation in which Perez said:

"I don't need to respect you, and you're a fag. You're gay, and stop being such a faggot." GLAAD is not happy! A spokesperson for the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation says: "These are vulgar antigay slurs that feed a climate of hatred and intolerance toward our community. For someone in our own community to use it to attack another person by saying that it is 'The worst possible thing that thug would ever want to hear,' is incredibly dangerous. It legitimizes use of a slur that is often linked to violence against our community. And it sends a message that it is OK to attempt to dehumanize people by exploiting antigay attitudes." [E!]

• Fergie's husband Josh Duhamel on the Perez kerfluffle: "When you get rich saying hateful things sometimes you ask for it… It's an unfortunate incident and I hope it goes away." [ET Online]
• Tila Tequila has gone off on Perez Hilton. From her Twitter: "you are such a whiney bitch! quit crying ur not a star." And! "I will not be like other celebs who are afraid of him and kiss his ass! i am not afraid of Perez Hilton. He knows he can't fuck with me." Plus: "I find it ironic that Perez talks shit about people all day long. He calls people faggot yet bashes Miss California. Perez Hilton is a bitch." [ONTD]
• Oh snap: Kirstie Alley also went off, making fun of Perez by Tweeting: "Will.I.Am? You am my new hero… smack!!! Wah wah wah… ouch ouch my eye… ouch ouch ouch call 911 boo hoo ouch." [ONTD]
• John Mayer joined the Perez hate on Twitter. [Pop Dirt]
• And Kelly Clarkson says no one will pity Perez and she would give her left arm to look as pretty as Fergie does. [ONTD]
• Polo Molina, the manager of the Black Eyed Peas, is the one who hit Perez and has turned himself in. Perez says to Will.I.Am : "I'd have more respect for you if you hit me yourself - you're a coward. Violence is never the answer. Fuck you, will.i.am, for lying. Shame on you. I did not deserve what happened to me. I have lost all respect for all of you and the Black Eyed Peas. And Fergie, you're fugly." Stay classy. [Gatecrasher]
• "Jail 'Break' For Rihanna Ex: Beater Brown Gets Off Easy With Assault Plea." [NY Post]
• RIP Ed McMahon: 1923-2009. [Post Chronicle]
• Jon and Kate Gosselin announced that they are separating on last night's show. (And court documents show they have filed for divorce.) This columnist speculates that Jon will become a C-list celeb and Kate will be watched closely — people will be expecting her to cross the line or make a misstep with the kids. [MSNBC Scoop]
• "It still remains to be seen how TLC will handle the episodes of Jon & Kate shot before the divorce papers were filed - and now instantly dated. The channel has made a huge 40-episode order for the show's fifth season." [Variety]
• Cameron Diaz got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame yesterday, and Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and Lucy Liu were there to celebrate with her. [People]
• Scenes from a lunch with Betty White and Cloris Leachman! It's hilarious. Cloris says of the tunic she makes for her clothing line, Clorisline: "It looks so pretty. Just tie it, put on some jewelry, go out to dinner and get drunk." Betty has quips too — just read it. [USA Today]
• Amy Winehouse wishes to become a permanent resident of St, Lucia! The weed must be really, really good. [Gatecrasher]
• Readers of Heat magazine in the UK have voted Robert Pattinson as the sexiest man on the planet. Blinded by the sparkles! [Mirror]
• BREAKING: Miley Cyrus makes money. [TMZ]
• David Beckham won "substantial" libel damages over a newspaper's claim that he "made a play" for a model. The story was printed on the front page of The Daily Star in April, and Beckham's lawyer called the allegation "serious and defamatory" and "untrue." The newspaper has retracted. [Mirror]
• OMG: A movie with Cher and Christina Aguilera? So much hair! So little wardrobe! So much attitude! [Variety]
• Even though there were reports that Anna Faris and Chris Pratt had wed in Hawaii, Anna's rep says: "it's not true." [Daily Express]
• A dude who played a gangster in Slumdog Millionaire has been accused of threatening the owner of a production company — demanding roles in films! [Times Of India]
• Lauryn Hill canceled all of her European tour dates; Wyclef Jean will stand in for her at the Montreux Jazz Festival. [Reuters]
• One of the co-executive producers of Heroes has abruptly left the show. [NY Mag]
• One of Candy Spelling's former employees claims Candy fired her for complaining about being overworked and underpaid. [TMZ]
• Katie "Jordan" Price has gotten a crude X tattooed over the tattoo of her estranged husband's name on her wrist. It looks bad. (But the pix of her gallivanting on a powerboat near Ibiza look awesome.) [Daily Mail]
• Katie "Jordan" Price has ever-so-eloquently Tweeted: "pete being a true cunt to me ! he left me nt me leave him." [The Sun, Twitter]
• The Spice Girls made a ton of cash last year, from touring. [Mirror]
• Blind item! "Which hot young bachelor has (quite disappointingly) revealed himself to be a totally awful kisser?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I was broke at the time and this was my chance to make a few bucks, so I jumped at the opportunity to record for my first time in a professional studio. The work I did back then in no way reflects the music I am currently in the studio working on. I'm thrilled to be working with some of today's hottest songwriters and producers and can't wait for people to hear what my music really sounds like." — Adam Lambert is not a fan of his song, "Want," recorded before American Idol. [NY Daily News]
• "I think crime here is shocking and knife crime is shocking and everyone must do what they can to be safe." — Kevin Spacey finds London a wee dangerous. [Telegraph]
• "I recently gave a self-esteem workshop for Girl Scouts in Nashville, and I told the girls that I wasn't a role model for my weight, because I change. Sometimes I'm thicker when I'm around my family and I'm eating more. Sometimes I'm thinner because I'm on the road and that takes a lot out of me. But I do feel it's important to talk to girls about weight. They see these images, and there's no way they'll ever live up to them. I want them to see someone who is real and know they don't have to live up to anything." — Kelly Clarkson. [Reader's Digest]
• "I have a very serious regime of starvation and stress. I have gotten meaner as I have gotten thinner. I'm like the lost Olsen triplet." — Kathy Griffin. [WWD]
• "Everybody is unique. They're both very beautiful and they're both kind of sexy gals. Maybe Megan will start doing the things that Angie is so well known for. [Angie] is obviously known for her helping with kids and concern for others. I think that would be wonderful for all of the kids [if Megan were to do the same]. Megan can do a lot of good, so that would be great." — Jon Voight, on the similarities between his daughter Angelina Jolie and Megan Fox. And yes, he said his daughter was sexy. [Life &Style]

• GLAAD is concerned about Sacha Baron Cohen's depiction of homosexuality in Brüno:

"We have very mixed emotions about the movie," says GLAAD's Rashad Robinson. "Those of us who saw the film agreed that you can't critique it as a single film because it's more like 90 minutes of individual sketches. Some are funny and hit their mark but others hit the [gay] community instead." GLAAD is asking for a bit where a baby is sitting in the same hot tub where two men are having sex be cut. "As someone who sat at the back of a focus group audience outside of Los Angeles, I felt they were laughing at us at times." [E!]

• Sacha Baron Cohen, dressed as Brüno, showed up outside of Buckingham Palace yesterday and announced: "I hope Prince Harry is coming to the premiere – I've heard he's a total slut!" [Telegraph]
• Brüno on prime minister Gordon Brown: "The guy needs a total makeover. He needs a fake tan, he needs to wear some tight slacks." [Telegraph]
• In the UK, you can't see Brüno unless you're over 18. [Telegraph]
• WTF: "Two police chiefs are under investigation for allegedly breaking into the Martins Ferry, Ohio, home of Sarah Jessica Parker's surrogate in an attempt to dig up dirt they hoped to sell to the tabloids." [Gatecrasher]
• Elle magazine says it has "no reason" to believe that Lindsay Lohan is responsible for $500,000 worth of Dior jewelry missing from a photoshoot. [Gatecrasher]
• Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have donated $1 million to the UN Refugee Agency, to help displaced people n Pakistan. This comes one week after Brad donated $1 million for a pediatric cancer center in Missouri. [People]
• Jersey Housewives' Danielle says of the showdown in the finale: "My kids deserved to see how Mommy was going to grow from this and move forward. My children needed to learn from that, and that is why they wanted to stay in the room." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Housewives' Dina says of Danielle: "I never denied that I was part of [exposing] the book. I just literally never had the book in my hands. Literally. Like, I never had possession of the book. So how can I go around showing something that was never in my hands? So Jacqueline misunderstood what I was saying. She thought I was saying I never had anything to do with it. But, no, I had everything to do with it." [People]
• Oh dear: Morgan Freeman had an affair with his step granddaughter??? [National Enquirer via Perez]
• Madonna is calling on Gwyneth Paltrow to help her decorate a room for new child, Mercy. Her Madgesty's "wish list" includes "porcelain dolls, antique teddy bears, a library of leather-bound children's books and ancient maps of Africa to adorn the walls." Plus! Lourdes is super excited about having a sister: "She's bought piles of leggings, hipster T-shirts, tutus and sneakers for the new arrival." [The Sun]
• This essay argues that Madonna's "acquisition" of Mercy just helps baby traffickers. [Daily Mail]
• "Madonna 'banned Kate Winslet's musician father from appearing on Snatch film soundtrack.'" [Daily Mail]
• Good news: Bret Michaels will not sue the Tony Awards, even though he was injured by a set piece: "I'm taking the high road." [People]
• Has Sean Penn gone back to his wife after Natalie Portman broke his heart? [Page Six]
• "Michael Jackson is looking for a child who is missing limbs or in a wheelchair to appear on stage with him at his O2 gigs." [The Sun]
• Wow: E! is asking fans if the site should be a "Speidi-Free Zone." In a poll, the site asks, "Beginning today through Sunday, we are putting it to the fans to decide whether to banish Heidi and Spencer from E! forever, or at least until they do something truly newsworthy." [E!]
• Billy Joel's daughter and ex-wife speak out about his split from wife Katie Lee: daughter Alexa says, "If my dad's happy, I'm happy and I respect any decision that he makes." Chrsitie Brinkley says: "I'm very sad that this has happened, and I wish them both happiness." [Extra]
• Billy Joel's wife Katie Lee was seen dancing "erotically" with fashion designer Yigal Azrouel six months ago, and some say he introduced her to people as his girlfriend. [NY Post]
• Apocalypto: Paris Hilton — and her reality show — have landed in Dubai. [AP]
• 50 Cent spent $33,000 on Tom Ford suits. [Page Six]
• Like Lost? Like Sawyer, aka Josh Holloway? In this clip, he talks about all kinds of stuff — his character, Jack, Juliet, etc. [EW]
• Lost alum Maggie Grace: Returning to Hawaii, but she teases: "I don't know why." [E!]
• I dare you, DARE you to watch this video of Ellen Page, Alia Shawkat (who was Maeby from Arrested Development), and Har Mar Superstar singing "Don't Stop Believing" and not cringe, wince or guffaw. [NY Mag]
• A fourth Mission: Impossible starring Tom Cruise? Just looks desperate. Although having JJ Abrams involved again is interesting. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Jennifer Aniston and Aaron Eckhart star in Love Happens, a movie about a self-help guru with a secret who dates a florist. Except it seems like the secret is given away in the trailer, which is posted at the link. [People]
• Reese Witherspoon with star in Pharm Girl, a comedy about one woman's experience working at a large pharmaceutical company — the longer she works there, the more she sees the "underbelly" of the industry. [The Hollywood Reporter]
• Rashida Jones will star in a rom com called Celeste And Jesse Forever, about a divorcing couple who attempt to maintain their friendship while pursuing new relationships. [UPI]
• Coming soon: A Bride Of Frankenstein remake, in which "the monster is a babe," someone like Scarlett Johansson or Anne Hathaway. [Page Six]
• Guy Ritchie's chauffeur: Caught driving without insurance. [The Sun]
• Kelis has filed her financials with the court and it all comes down to the fact that she doesn't have a lot of cash, and having a baby takes money. She'd like Nas to pay up. [TMZ]
• TR Knight is leaving Grey's Anatomy and word is, he wants to do Broadway. Or at least: Theater. [E!]
• Snippet from this Betty White interview: You stole the movie [The Proposal]. And added the sentimentality it needed. That scene in the airplane really got me. "Well aren't you dear. Thank you." There were some other topics I wanted to cover— "Can I get you any coffee or water?" [MovieLine]
• George Lucas is building an office complex that looks exactly like Hearst Castle. [mediabistro.com]
• Critical acclaim for the second season of Mad Men? Duh. [Variety]
• You can't sue the Bionic Woman over a car crash! She doesn't drive. She just runs, making a wannannana - wannanana - sound effect! [TMZ]
• Ozzy Osbourne will appear on Jack Osbourne's show, Celebrity Adrenaline Junkie, in which stars do stuff like bungee jump, white water raft and skydive. [The Sun]
• "Ryan Cabrera Sued over Death Trap Driveway." [TMZ]
• Katie "Jordan" Price got drunk in Ibiza and said to a journalist: "I'm gonna cut your fucking face. I swear to God I'll fucking cut you." Charming! [Daily Mail]
• Is Conan O'Brien losing viewers to David Letterman? [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which ditsy blond didn't seem to care when a crowd of ladies caught her sniffing Colombia's finest - right out in the open - in Atlantic City?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Miss Congeniality was a romantic comedy, I call that a buddy flick. It's a new kind of film. If you really think about it; it wasn't about romance, it was about her saving her friend at the beauty pageant. Men do films like this, The Proposal or Miss Congeniality, all the time and they're considered comedies and there's always love in it. There's always love in it. There's always a relationship. I would like to help create a broader spectrum of categories where the writing gets better. There are great writers out there." — Sandra Bullock. [Reuters]
• "He's like a new man. He really went through something [with that racist tirade incident]. He used to be very angry and bitter. He's completely different now. You can see it, and he can feel it. I'm very happy for him." — Larry David on Michael Richards. [Reuters]
• "I wish I could afford to be here all the time, but it's a very expensive city to work in. It's gotten worse for me. It's gotten better in that they give you tax breaks. But everything (else) has gone up. I work on a very limited budget." — Woody Allen. [USA Today]
• "Chaz is embarking on a difficult journey, but one that I will support. I respect the courage it takes to go through this transition in the glare of public scrutiny, and although I may not understand, I will strive to be understanding ... The one thing that will never change is my abiding love for my child." — Cher, on her daughter's decision to undergo a sex change. [TMZ]
• "Positive is not funny. Nobody laughs at positive, 'What a beautiful day it is!' or how many friends I have, how many people love me. There's nothing funny about that at all. But there's funny in the negative. When you speak in negative terms, the more negative, the funnier it is. Hence, the funny crank." — Larry David. [LA Times]
• "In America, there's such a hunger for young people, so you get the young up-and-coming star. And then it becomes a time period when they really don't know what to do with you or how to use you. And then it changes, I think, after 50 - then you become - 'I'm the mother of the 20-year-old.' So I'm hoping there's going to be a shift again and I'll work more." — Andie MacDowell, who says her 40s were an awkward time because she had trouble finding roles. [Yahoo News via AP]
• "I don't like the word 'cougar' because it just makes me think of teeth and somebody who's biting. We have to come up with a new word." — Countess Luann de Lesseps. [Gatecrasher]
• "You know what, I prefer a flatter-chested look. That's just kind of me. I think it's more of a fashion look. If you look at a lot of high-fashion models and things like that, they're always you know, a little flatter. I like the way clothes fit better…" — Lauren Conrad is not into plastic surgery. [People]
• "We should all believe in something, and I believe it's time for another shot of tequila." — Justin Timberlake. [Page Six]
• "Seriously, this is one of my favorite songs ever. I love the whole album. I'm completely immersed in it. I can't wait for you to hear it." — Mariah Carey on her OWN new single. [NY Daily News]

• Eric Ienco, Madonna's former house manager and cook, alleges that Madonna's kids are lucky if they get to spend a half an hour a day with her; "It's a puzzle she wants to adopt again."

• "She's hardly ever with her children. She's got two full-time nannies and one part-time nanny. So why adopt a kid if somebody else is raising them?" he said, adding, "Madonna puts herself before her kids. When she adopted little David, he arrived at her home from Africa - and three hours later, she left to do Pilates. Wouldn't you think she'd want to spend the entire day with her new son?" [The National Enquirer]
• Madonna's rep says the police didn't question her properly after she fell from a horse over the weekend in the Hamptons. Madonna claims the accident occurred when the horse was startled by the paparazzi. "Madonna was barely conscious and had fainted twice, right after the fall and when she was in the ambulance," said the rep. "She only remembers giving the police her name. They never asked her what happened. This could have been a very dangerous situation and we're just all grateful that she wasn't hurt more seriously."
  [Access Hollywood]
• Madonna's trainer, Tracy Anderson, said that even though she "fell on her bum," she'll continue working out. "She doesn't take time off," said Anderson. "I'm just going to modify [the workout] a little bit and get her moving again." [People]
• Channing Tatum says of says of his Fighting co-star Terrence Howard, "The more I hung out with Terrence, he would constantly talk about the craziest shit. Like he told me about how there's no cell that could ever hold him because he'd make acid from his urine and his feces." [Movie Line]
• Terrence Howard says he thinks the title Fighting is appropriate for the film. "This isn't necessarily about fisticuffs, it's about emotional battles that everyone goes through," he said, "Fighting, you know, is more of a synonym for the human condition." Co-star Channing Tatum wasn't as enthusiastic. "Trust me ... I gave them a thousand different other options for it," he said, like, "God, eh, ‘Last Chance,' eh, ‘Scared'…. It's about relationships," he said. "The whole movie is about relationships." [The Observer]
• Channing Tatum won't reveal details of his upcoming wedding to Jenna Dewan, but people can't help but notice her gigantic engagement ring. "Almost everybody goes, 'Oh my God, that is so big,' " said Dewan. "And I'm like, 'I know, I feel the same way.'" [People]
• The mother and stepmother of Slumdog Millionaire star Rubina Ali had a brawl in the streets of Mumbai over reports that Rubina's father was trying to sell her. Sadly, there is a video clip of the two women choking each other. [TMZ]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Jennifer Hudson's rep says she is not pregnant. [Extra]
• After a four year hiatus the VH1 Divas concert will return in September. VH1 is asking for diva suggestions. [PR Newswire]
• A Russian tabloid claims that Oksana Pochepa, one of the women claiming to be Mel Gibson's lover, is a nymphomaniac. "Sex is the most important thing for her. She had a great deal of partners, although she was not like a prostitute," a friend said. "She just loved sex. She had her first experience when she was in the ninth grade and could not stop afterwards. It was like fitness for her." [The Daily Beast]
• Former Miss USA Shanna Moakler wrote on her blog that she doesn't hate Miss California Carrie Prejean because of her anti-gay marriage remarks, "But she lost the crown because she wasn't able to convey compassion for ALL the people that as MISS USA she would be representing. and if YOU like it or not, gays and lesbians make up this country as well. THIS is why we have judges so they can find the RIGHT woman who obtains these qualities. they are crucial in my eyes when holding a honor and title as big as being Miss USA. The panel of judges was qualified and did their job, they represented all of us, men, woman, black, white, gay and straight." [Perez Hilton]
• There's a rumor going around that Cher and her daughter Chastity Bono are pitching a reality show that would follow Chastity's sex change. Cher's rep said they are not currently shopping a reality show, and that if they were it would not be about Chastity getting a sex change. [E!]
• Lakers center Andrew Bynum is denying that he took Rihanna out on her first post-Chris Brown date last weekend. [TMZ]
• Actress Natascha McElhone has pledged to continue her late husband's work with his charity Facing the World, which offers surgery to third-world children with facial disfigurements. [The Daily Express]
• Project Runway will debut on Lifetime on August 20. Also premiering that night: Models of the Runway a half-hour show about the competition among the models. [Time]
• In keeping with the title Relapse the cover of Eminem's new album is a portrait of Slim Shady sculpted with pills. [Rolling Stone]
• LeAnn Rimes says even though tabloids are reporting that she cheated on her husband, she's doing great. "It's something that I'm not going to back and forth in the press about, because it does hurt me and my loved ones, and I'm really not going to address tabloid rumors and I'm sticking to that," she said. [Yahoo]
• Jamie Foxx said he almost quit his role in The Soloist because of the mental strain. "It was something that I enjoyed, but it shredded me. I went to places that I never thought I would ever go. I just remember being in my bathroom broke down, talking to my manager like, ‘I don't know if I'll be able to finish this ... You had to lose your mind every day you're on set, and sometimes you didn't have enough time to get your mind back before the weekend." [Bossip]
• The jurors for the Tribeca Film festival have been announced, and they are a diverse bunch. For instance, the Narrative Short jurors are Thomas Haden Church, James Franco, Mary Harron, Debra Messing and Mary-Kate Olsen, which The Times points out is "the entire leading cast of Ned and Stacy and about half the cast of Spider-Man 3." [NY Times]
• Jade Goody's mother, Jackiey Budden, says while she was dying of cervical cancer Jade asked her to smother her. "If she was on a machine we'd have to turn it off, but when you've got cancer you don't have a machine. She wanted me to put a pillow over her head," said her mom. "I really didn't want to see her go that way." [The Star]
• Whoopi Goldberg says friend Patrick Swayze is keeping busy as he fights pancreatic cancer. "He's kicking butt," said Goldberg. "And, you know, he's sick. And he, like the rest of us, doesn't know when it's going to happen — because it will happen, that he is going to go — but he doesn't know when or where. ... His attitude is, why wait for it to happen? So he's busy as hell."[UPI]
• Uma Thurman is supposedly planning to marry her fiance, Arpad Busson, on Saturday. [The Sun]
• Billy Bob Thornton says of his new action film Eagle Eye, "Every now and then you have to do a big action movie, so you can pay for the house. And you have to pick a good one, because most of them are just crap. And this one is really good." [The L.A. Times]
• Michelle Rodriguez went to the Dominican Republic last weekend to be a bridesmaid in her friends wedding. She reportedly pushed clothed guests in the pool, and at the bachelorette party she called the male stripper "fat" then said, "This is the kind of thing that brings out the bisexual in me." [Perez Hilton]
• On April 17 Dave Grohl and wife Jordyn Blum welcomed their second daughter, named Harper Willow Grohl. [People]
• Dawne Wilson, who allegedly threatened to kill Tyler Perry in an email, has been charged with felony aggravated stalking. [TMZ]
• After returning from a weekend trip to Las Vegas, Lindsay Lohan went clubbing in Hollywood last night with a male friend. [Perez Hilton]
• Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag will be holding the rehearsal dinner before their wedding this weekend at Wolfgang Puck's Beverly Hills restaurant Cut if you care. [People]
• Noel Gallagher says Oasis may be taking a five year hiatus from recording and touring. [NY Magazine]
• In an interview Paula Abdul called Simon Cowell a "masterful bully" and said she almost quit seven times during the first season because she, "couldn't believe that someone was actually getting away with crushing fragile kids. This happens behind your back, not in front of your face ... And when someone attacks you with criticism that isn't constructive, sometimes it's hard to take. [ABC News]
• In her new book, Tori Spelling talks about worrying that her son Liam had a big nose after seeing the ultrasound. She says: "I did speculate about that because when I saw the sonogram, all I could think about was, 'Oh my God, does his nose look large?' Obviously, that comes from what I experienced myself growing up. But when you get your sonogram, it's the last few months of the pregnancy and your kid is running out of room in there-they're all squashed up. So the features are greatly exaggerated. But I didn't know that then. They look a bit scary. So I just put the question out there-is that reaction a characteristic of someone living in Hollywood? Or do moms everywhere think the same thing? Do they all worry about what their kids will look like? I think they do." [The Daily Beast]

• Rihanna is currently on a beach in Mexico, and this picture on the cover of the NY Daily News is the first we've seen of her in a long while. [NY Daily News]

• Chris Brown's March 5 arraignment may be postponed because the LAPD is still investigating the case. A source told E! News, "The D.A. is being even more thorough than usual with this case. They don't want to mess it up." [E!]
• Kevin Federline is starting his own children's clothing line because he doesn't want to pay a lot for jeans. He says: "It's a really tough business, I'm trying to take it seriously and make a quality product for kids but not have parents pay like $500 or something ridiculous for a pair of jeans. You buy your kids a pair of True Religions, then they roll around in the dirt like kids do and a $200 pair of jeans is gone. With this economy, I'm looking to do something much more reasonable." Uh… All you have to do is shop at The Children's Place or Old Navy or Target or somewhere they don't sell True Religion for children. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Meanwhile, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are suing baby buggy company Silver Cross, claiming the manufacturer unlawfully used a picture of the celebrity parents pushing twins Emme and Max in their strollers. Don't you know if you want J. Lo and Marc to endorse your product, you have to pay? [E!]
• It's hard to focus on this story about how Lily Allen likes naked lapdances and partying with Lindsay Lohan because the picture of Lily and Lindsay wearing black masks and showing off their "shh" tattoos is oddly mesmerizing. Question: Did we ever figure out what LL meant when she said the "shh" tattoo was a "woman empowerment thing"? [The Sun]
• Katie Holmes may be working on a flick in New York, but she plays "fourth fiddle" behind Kevin Kline, Paul Dano and John C. Reilly. Fox's Roger Friedman calls her movie career "over." [Fox 411]
• Slumdog's Dev Patel is in talks to appear on the real Who Wants To Be A Millionaire to raise cash for kids living on the streets. [The Sun]
• What's next for the stars of Slumdog? Lots more movies. [NY Daily News]
• Madonna is helping Rosie O'Donnell get through menopause. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Dita Von Teese signed a record deal. She will be singing now. Of course, she won't be warbling "All The Single Ladies" or anything: She plans to cover Irving Berlin's "Lazy." [E!]
• Keira Knightley was to play Cordelia in a £25 million film version of King Lear, but it's been scrapped. [Telegraph]
• Peaches Geldof was not allowed to drink at the NME awards; she placed an alcohol ban on herself. [Daily Mail]
• Jay Leno was questioned by a Writers Guild panel yesterday; they are trying to determine if he violated strike rules by delivering a monologue last year (during the strike). [Variety]
• LOL: Ever since Kellogg's dumped Michael Phelps, there have been oodles of negative stories about the brand. [Silicon Alley Insider]
• DMX is in jail, where he is not behaving himself: He stole a tray of food from the dining hall and threw it at a corrections officer. How would they handle this on Oz? [Perez]
• Chris Isaak has his own talk show, The Chris Isaak Hour, on the Bio channel. It starts tonight! Guests play songs and chat and hang out with Chris's dog. [USA Today]
• If you get divorced, the guys you date afterward, who put a "spark" back in your heartbroken life — Jennifer Aniston calls them "defibrillator men." [Daily Mail]
• "Big Poppa" has moved in with Real Housewives' Kim Zolciak. Yeah, he's married. [NY Daily News]
• In case you've been wondering what the hell she's been up to, Kate Bosworth is producing the film based on a book called Lost Girls and Love Hotels. [Gatecrasher]
• What the world needs now: A Jerry Seinfeld marriage-oriented reality show. Celebs, comedians and athletes will "judge couples in the midst of marital disputes while recommending various strategies to resolve their problems." I thee dread! [Hollywood Reporter]
• Brenda Blethyn opened a new library in her hometown and paid a fine for a book she borrowed 50 years ago. Bet Hortense loves this one. [The Sun]
• Clint Eastwood is the second person ever to received a lifetime achievement honor from the organizers of the Cannes Film Festival; he hot the Palme D'Or yesterday. Ingmar Bergman got one in 1997. [Reuters]
• The James Brown museum may be on hold, but there is a James Brown exhibit at South Carolina State University. See glittering suits and glossy shoes and the comb he used to neatly sculpt his hair. [AP]
• Star Jones's ex, Al Reynolds, is maybe getting engaged again, if you care. [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which sleazy reality star is going to have a cow when he finds out there's a sex tape of him floating around? In it, he's having a threesome with his very best friend." [Gatecrasher]
• "I'm probably a little bit shocked but I remember the overwhelming thing was feeling like I was just floating on a cloud. I went into that event knowing that was my last rally but no one else knew that. So when I crashed and I realised we were both OK, it was a massive relief." — Eric Bana, on crashing his race car during a Tasmanian rally. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "I sincerely hope that this tragedy will make people realize that great apes should never be kept as pets or exploited for films, television, or advertising. Their lives are miserable from the day that they are taken from their mothers... until they are cast off to roadside zoos or meet a violent end, as Travis did in this tragic case." — Anjelica Huston, on the chimpanzee attack. [Daily Express]
• "I think that at 12:30, either you're awake or you're not. I don't think the 10 p.m. will affect me at all. If we can do decent ratings, hold on to Conan's numbers, I'll be happy. It's a marathon, not a race. It's a long, long thing if it's going to work." — Jimmy Fallon. [USA Today]
• "The stars made by television who were once so big you just couldn't believe it-Johnny Carson, Carol Burnett, people like that, Sid Caesar-they were enormous stars made by television, but there were lots of real stars in America. Now everything is so vitiated because there is so much media, if we want to dignify a lot of it, it begins to just all run together. At least when you said "Clark Gable" or "Elizabeth Taylor" or "Katharine Hepburn," you knew exactly who you were talking about, you didn't have to explain them. Now you have to talk about people like Paris Hilton and Britney Spears and the people on the American Idol. I mean, it's very diminished in quality, I guess is what I'd say, the quality of stardom. Because I don't know who most of those people are. I'm not kidding! I read Page Six mystified every day, and everybody I talk to agrees with me. They don't know who anybody is." — Liz Smith. [The Daily Beast]
• "A real gossip story is Lana Turner's daughter killing Johnny Stompanato. It had all kinds of tragic ramifications-celebrity, sex, a little girl involved and so forth. I mean, who cares if somebody you've never heard of is sniffing cocaine in a bathroom down in Soho? That's the level of gossip today. There seems to me to be no real stories and the real ones all appear in the headlines-A-Rod taking steroids, though why anybody gives a shit I don't understand. You know, the real story of this year is Bernie Madoff, and betrayal, disaster and everything else, lives being smashed and ruined by somebody's criminal activity. But gossip? Even the ‘90s are beginning to look good." — Liz Smith. [The Daily Beast]
• "I thought that was something that you could use for humor, like any other comedian or someone else would utilize current events. After I saw the photographs of Rihanna, that wasn't funny anymore. There's a point you're already past a woman fighting you back. You look at (the photograph), and it obviously went past that point, so there's some issues there that definitely gotta be addressed. Not to take any shots at Chris or Rihanna or to take sides in any way, but it's really not cool. It's not funny at all anymore. That's why there won't be no more references to that from me in any way." — 50 Cent, who initially mocked the Rihanna/Chris Brown incident with a "Street Fighter"- like characters in an animated video. [MSNBC]
• "I was average. I had a lot of friends but I was not in that ultra cool circle. I was a bit of a class clown. I guess to get through the tedium of the quadratic formula, I thought everyone was fair game. Between self-discovery and the social hierarchy, high school can be the most confusing time of your life." — Zac Efron. [Mirror]
• "I'm so negative against her. She just shouldn't have any of those children as far as I'm concerned. I know that's going to get me in a whole mess of trouble, but I don't know where her mind is. She says the strangest things. I don't think she's doing drugs, but she acts like someone who is not of this world. It's like, 'hello, come down to Planet Earth with the rest of us!'" —Cher, on Nadya Suleman. [USA Today via ET]
• "My mom is like this hard-core, liberal feminist. She's a professor in Boston, and she's been teaching women's studies for 30 years and international politics. So I've traveled, and I've heard so many women's stories, and I've heard stories of really, really hard lives. And I just feel like there are so many stories to be told, and it's hard to find someone who can sort of intertwine them with the right kind of action and suspense and use genius metaphors ... while striking a chord with the universal theme of the search for one's true identity. I asked Joss [Whedon] to create it with me and for me, and it was really special to me." — Eliza Dushku, star of Dollhouse. [USA Today]

[Los Angeles, January 28. Image via WENN]

• Okay, so they're saying Beyoncé had a little armpit hair at the Cadillac Records premiere. 1) Who cares? 2) Can you even see it? [Mirror]
• A reader points out you can barely see Beyoncé's pit hair in Perez's pictures, though on TMZ, her pits seem especially hirsute. Photoshop of horrors? [Perez Hilton, TMZ]
• Surely when Kanye West said that Beyoncé is "just as great, if not greater, than artists we had in the past. She’s probably greater than Tina Turner," he had not seen this. [Perez Hilton]
• Tina Turner put on a show in New York right after being hospitalized for having a very high fever. Amazing. [Page Six]

• William Balfour, the man accused of killing Jennifer Hudson's mother, brother and nephew, is innocent, says William Balfour's lawyer. [People]
• Amy Winehouse's husband Blake Fielder-Civil, failed a drug test, so he's headed back to prison to be Blake Incarcerated again. [Daily Mail, Mirror]
• Here's the thing: If Blake had stayed in prison instead of going to rehab as part of an early release, he'd be out at the end of the month. Now he could be in jail until 2010. Whoops! [The Sun]
• Remember how Miley Cyrus said she was "embarrassed" by her Vanity Fair issue with those suggestive Annie Leibovitz pictures? Well she told Scotland's Daily Record: "Everyone outside of America liked it a little bit more because that's more like the style, but the States are really conservative." And! "I would love to be a photographer. She was amazing and so talented and her lighting... I would love to work with her again. But I realize I'm just a kid." [ONTD]
• Madonna was in Buenos Aires yesterday, where she met with Argentine President Cristina Fernandez as well as former guerilla hostage Ingrid Betancourt. [USA Today]
• Twilight's Kristen Stewart will play Joan Jett in biopic The Runaways. Do we approve of this casting? [Hollywood Reporter]
• Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham on her new clothing line: "Do I draw? No. Then again, nor do lots of designers. But I put it all on myself and walk around in it, and I know what feels comfortable. I know how a dress should sit. I’ve worn so many and when I see the photographs I think, crikey, my boobs are up round my neck again because the corsets are too short and not cut high enough." Ooh, and: "In these recessionary times, and at these prices, women are looking for something that will be an investment, aren’t they?" [Mirror]
• "I was never that good a singer, but I think I am good at fashion." — Victoria Beckham. [The Sun]
• Rihanna and Chris Brown are being sued by a photographer, who claims he was beaten and robbed of his $3,000 camera after taking a picture of the couple in May. Did the singers' bodyguards go ballistic? [TMZ]
• Hockey star and Vogue intern Sean Avery has been suspended by the NHL for making "inappropriate comments." He said: "I just want to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds," referring to ex girlfriends Elisha Cuthbert and Rachel Hunter, who are both dating other players. [AP, Gawker]
• A sneak peek at the season premiere of Lost! Drama for Kate and not-so-little-baby Aaron, involving the nature of their relationship… [LA Times]
• Christina Aguilera wears a heart-shaped locket with her son Max's name on it and a tiny drop of human blood. She doesn't say whose blood it is, but does claim: "I love the symbolism of the blood droplet. It's like Max pierced my heart." [Perez Hilton]
• Naomi Watts plans to get naked in the name of art. [Daily Express]
• First Alyson Hannigan, now How I Met Your Mother costar Cobie Smulders is pregnant, too. Something in the water? [MSNBC]
• Pete Wentz admits that getting Ashlee Simpson knocked up was a "happy accident." [Page Six]
• Audrina Patridge has written a blog post in which she says: "I just want to put it on record that never did I EVER call Lauren a 'slut,' 'bad friend,' 'shady person,' etc. I simply asked her a question and that’s how she interpreted it. I didn’t go around town running my mouth either." Plus: "Justin and Lauren treating me like I wasn’t worthy of an explanation was almost worse than the rumor itself, and it only got worse the harder I tried to get a genuine answer." And! as for JustinBobby: "His inexcusable behavior has become somewhat expected at this point. And I just want to say that if I were looking for a serious relationship, I would definitely be looking elsewhere!" [People]
• Zoolander sequel: Good idea? Not sure. Me and my friends have been too busy sunbathing off the southern coast of St. Bart's with spider monkeys for the past two weeks, tripping on acid. Changed our whole perspective on shit. [ONTD]
• CBS has a midseason series called Game Show In My Head, a reality show produced by Ashton Kutcher. Contestants must perform "embarrassing and hilarious" tasks in front of strangers to earn cash. [NY Times]
• VH1 is ordering up 8 episodes of Tough Love, a reality series from Nancy Juvonen and Drew Barrymore's Flower Films. The premise: A group of women in a house get "ready" to meet Mr. Right by having their destructive dating habits "reshaped" at "tough love boot camp." [Variety]
• Johnny Depp's production company has acquired the screen rights to In The Hand Of Dante, a Nick Tosches novel. [Variety]
• Tyler Perry was in court over allegations that he stole the material for his blockbuster film Diary of a Mad Black Woman from a playwright named Donna West. [Yahoo News]
• Donny Osmond on gay marriage: "There are many gay individuals that are members of our church. I know many of them. In fact, some of my best friends are gay. You ask how I react regarding their marriages. Well, I do support our Church leaders who say that we can accept those with gay tendencies in our church as long as they do not act upon their temptations. Everyone has tendencies to succumb to temptation, but we all have the same standard given to us by our Father in Heaven. Whether we may be tempted to be immoral with members of our own sex or of the opposite sex, we are expected to live chaste lives." [Joe. My. God., Donny.com]
• Dylan McDermott, who married his wife Shiva Rose in 1995 and = with whom he has two children, will be single again on January 2, when their divorce is final. New year, new you. [TMZ]
• Kristin Chenoweth is working on a memoir, due in stores April 2009. [Daily Express]
• Ricky Gervais answers reader questions, and talks about the Beckhams being in an Extras special. [The Sun]
• Brandy, who has not recorded anything for four years, has a new album, out December 9. She still faces a wrongful death lawsuit which goes to trial in April, stemming from a car accident in which another driver died. Says she: "What I experienced in the past couple of years was tough, but I had to face it and find the strength to move forward. Connecting back with music has definitely helped me through everything. Once I got back in the studio, the butterflies went away." [Yahoo News]
• Julianne Hough and her boyfriend are "talking marriage" but are not engaged. [People]
• Gary Coleman was in court yesterday, facing a disorderly conduct charge from that Utah incident outside of a bowling alley. He paid $100, case closed. [ET]
• What's a Hollywood lawsuit without mentioning the name Bruce Willis? [TMZ]
• Former Playmate Shauna sand claims she was choked, punched and thrown across the room in front of her kids by her husband, Romain Chavent. She got a restraining order against him yesterday and the paperwork alleges that the Frenchman hit her in the breasts when she'd just had reconstructive surgery. [TMZ]
• Donald Trump is mad at his brother Robert, since Robert's getting divorced but failed to get a pre-nup. Ouch. [Page Six]
• "I have a passion for words. That has always been in me, and I wanted to see if I could come up with some interesting phrases. I wanted to make people laugh a little and to tell some good stories." — actor Christopher Plummer, whose memoir is "engaging." [WSJ]
• "Nobody really wants to recognize that Beyoncé is a fucking living legend." — Kanye West. [Perez Hilton]
• "Every investor and financier turned down this film because of Mickey Rourke, but I wouldn't do the film without him." — Director Darren Aronofsky, on The Wrestler. [Page Six]
• "Some actors take drugs, drink, and act crazy to light a fire within them; others take drugs, drink, and act oddly to put out the fire in them. Mickey [Rourke] is one of those actors." — Alec Baldwin. [Page Six]
• "It is fun, obviously, to kiss Beyoncé. I insisted on a lot of takes." — Adrien Brody, on his role in Cadillac Records. [Rush & Molloy]
• "I got my gig late, got married late, had my kid late – and none of it came a minute too soon. All my life I'd had this problem with following through, not feeling that I was worth it. Not having a mother makes you think, 'If only I'd been better, she wouldn't have left me.'" — Mariska Hargitay. [People]
• "I've been contemplating taking a college course in religion. I love religion. I remember whenever the book The Da Vinci Code came out, the Discovery Channel did this three-night piece on it that I TiVoed and then watched eight times." — noted scholar Jessica Simpson. [Page Six]
• "I'm planning an album of all these great songs from the '60s that I've never covered before. It was such a magical time for music - groups like The Beatles, the Hollies, the Zombies, the Kinks, the Stones and singers like Dylan and Otis Redding… I want to pay tribute to a time when I used to listen to music on my little transistor radio or on my AM radio in my Ford Mustang." — Cher. [Page Six]

• Madonna and Alex Rodriguez are "quietly" shopping for a love nest in Manhattan. Is this relationship really real? And why so quick on the rebound, your Madgesty? [Page Six]
• Neither Angelina Jolie nor Brad Pitt can really cook. Angie's "signature dish" is cereal. Brad says, "I can rock a Sunday BBQ but that’s as far as my culinary talents go." [The Sun]
• Barack Obama will almost certainly be Barbara Walters' "Most Fascinating Person of 2008." [Rush & Molloy]
• Beyoncé, blue? Back in 1999, after Destiny's Child changed group members, and the former members accused her father of failing to share profits, Beyoncé felt that everyone blamed her for the group's troubles. She says, "For a couple of years when I was 19 I suffered depression." [Daily Express]
• Check out Beyoncé on the cover of Giant. [Concrete Loop]
• Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty want to do a film together? Is this a joke? [The Sun]

• Amy Winehouse sent X Factor judge Louis Walsh a green tie and shamrock cufflinks as a thank you for being nice to her goddaughter Dionne, who visited the show. The gift came with a handwritten note. A source says: "I very much doubt that Amy wrote it herself as at the end of note there was just a scrawling signature in completely different writing." [The Sun]
• Kate Moss and Jamie Hince had a "scuffle" over their holiday plans: Kate had scratches on her cheek; Jamie had a black eye from her chunky ring. [Page Six]
• OMFG: Gossip Girl's Ed Westwick and Jessica Szohr (Chuck Bass and Vanessa) were seen "canoodling" at the Dallas airport on Sunday night. [Page Six]
• Did anyone see Nastia Liukin on Gossip Girl last night? [LA Times]
• Speaking of Gossip Girl, Kelly Rutherford, aka Lilly van Der Woodsen, is expecting her second child. [ET]
• Gwyneth Paltrow is still with Chris Martin; the rumors that she'd shacked up with a real estate billionaire appear to be false. [Rush & Molloy]
• This reporter is shocked that there are dozens of Facebook groups dedicated to "bullying" Nicole Kidman. One is called "Am I Taking Crazy Pills or is Nicole Kidman the Worst Actress in the World?" and another is "Nicole Kidman Looks Like An Alien With Foetal Alcohol Syndrome." The writer claims, "She is hard-working and dedicated to her family and hasn't a hint of the prima donna about her, they say." [News.com.au]
• Kanye West was playing his new album for the band Keane so loud that he blew up the mixing desk. [The Sun]
• Try to picture Keanu Reeves on a panel with Caltech researchers. It's happening Friday; he's discussing his flick The Day The Earth Stood Still and how "science in the movie meshes with real world scientific research." [UPI]
• The new season of American Idol will be "more real" and "intimate" and "raw," "letting the kids be more emotional." Somehow, Paula Abdul plays a role in this. [MSNBC Scoop]
• You know how Peaches Geldof was working on a magazine? It's called Disappear Here and it will be distributed free on Thursday, in "secret places" in New York. [Gawker]
• News you can't use: Clay Aiken is a "hands-on dad." [People]
• Lost fans: There's a casting call out for a father and son who speak Arabic… Sayid backstory plotline alert! [EW]
• Former UCLA Medical Center employee Lawanda Jackson pleaded guilty Monday to selling confidential info about Farrah Fawcett's cancer battle to the National Enquirer. Plus, she used her boss's password to access the medical records of dozens of patients, including Britney Spears and Maria Shriver. She'll be sentenced in May. [Yahoo News]
• Parminder Nagra, who plays Dr. Neela Rasgotra on ER — and whom some may recall as "Jess" from Bend It Like Beckham, is pregnant with her first child. The baby daddy is boyfriend James Stenson, a photographer, with whom she's been for 7 years. [Us Magazine, UPI]
• Courteney Cox Arquette will be on three episodes of Scrubs, starting January 6. Matthew Perry will also show up on Scrubs, later in the season. [People]
• Eva Longoria smokes. [Perez Hilton]
• "Michael Phelps has turned into a party and poker animal, surrounding himself with bimbos and booze." [Page Six]
• M.I.A. is expecting a B.A.B.Y. and is keeping B.U.S.Y. — she has 3 songs on the Slumdog Millionaire soundtrack and launched N.E.E.T., a record label to bring politically charged music to the mainstream. She says: "I think my baby is going to start off making club music. That's all I've been listening to. Of course, you never know. When you want someone to do something, it ends up doing the opposite. It might end up being an accountant." [USA Today]
• Uma Thurman's parents unknowingly hired Tanya Hollander — who is accused of booking call girls at Eliot Spitzer's fave escort service — to manage their upstate yoga center. [NY Post]
• Mariah Carey's husband Nick Cannon has purchased a million dollar ski chalet for Mimi in Aspen. Joint bank account though, right? [Mirror]
• Gabrielle Union says the rumor mill helps her dating life: "Ludacris and Hill Harper are two of my closest male friends, and people always said we were all dating. It's like they were blocking for me. I could date the people I wanted to date and no one ever knew because they thought I was, as somebody said, 'sucking face' with Hill Harper." [Daily Express]
• Ellen Page's Oscar nomination is not enough to get her membership in the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences — the peeps who vote on the Oscars. [NY Mag]
• Cate Blanchett: Getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame this Friday! [Daily Express]
• Akon's trial for endangering the welfare of a minor — stemming from when he threw a 15-year-old kid off the stage in a 2007 concert — has been postponed until December 17. [Perez Hilton]
• Donald Trump's brother, Robert, is getting divorced from socialite and major philanthropist Blaine Trump. [NY Post]
• Naomi Campbell's Russian billionaire boyfriend punched a photographer in the gut. [Page Six]
• We haven't seen Cher in a while, because she's been in Nepal working with orphans. [Page Six]
• Hear Helena Bonham Carter's voice in an MTV ad about domestic abuse. [Guardian]
• Singer Bryan Adams has called the cops over a mother and son stalker team. The pair — possibly from Romania and suffering psychiatric problems — have been following Adams for weeks. [The Sun]
• Did the fact that Axl Rose went "missing" for two months cost Guns N' Roses the number one slot on the charts? [The Sun]
• The set used for the British TV show The Office was destroyed after a massive explosion and fire. [Daily Express]
• "Some people talk about their personal lives a lot. I try not to, unless it's more of a generality. I don't want to broadcast my personal life because I feel it's off-putting. People are like, 'Oh, shut the fuck up. Cry me a river.' Who wants to hear the reality, really? You can't win." — Kate Bosworth. [Daily Expess]
• "I sit with my investors and business managers and accountants looking at the numbers and I’m like, 'Yo, the values of stocks in different areas that I invested in are decreasing!' So I take the loss like everybody else…I’m waking up in a room that was previously Mike Tyson’s bedroom, a fighter who earned over $500 million in his actual career, and when I purchased his house from him he was in bankruptcy…If that’s not a strong enough reminder for you, I don’t know what’s going to remind you to be aware of where you are financially and make conscious decisions…" — 50 Cent, in Forbes. [The.Life Files]

• Fran Drescher is speaking out in order to encourage her fellow California residents to vote no on Proposition 8, stating: "This proposition is not about gay marriage; it's about hate, discrimination and intolerance of diversity. It is wholesale, unadulterated hate-mongering and it MUST be snuffed out in a dramatic fashion at once to illustrate to those behind it that in America we embrace the neighbor who might be different from us and are proud of it!" [HuffingtonPost]

• Bangarang, Rufio: Agent Provacateur has just released their new ad campaign, featuring model Helena Christiansen as a sexed-up "Pirate Queen." [Telegraph]

• Shanna Moakler tells People that her ex-husband, Travis Barker, "had a feeling that something was about to happen," before he boarded the plane that crashed, killing six of his fellow passengers and leaving Barker with third-degree burns on the lower half of his body. [People]

• Uh-oh! Apparently the photos Brad Pitt took of Angelina Jolie breast feeding for W Magazine have "upset Brad's parents." [Star]

• Simon Cowell and his girlfriend of six years, Terri Seymour, have officially split. Seymour apparently dumped Cowell by phone, which is almost as harsh as Simon Cowell has been to 8 million Idol wannabes over the past 5 years. [People]

• Criss Angel has nothing but love for Hugh Hefner's ex, Holly Madison. Angel had high praise for the Girl Next Door, who accompanied the wacky magician to the opening of his new Cirque du Soleil show in Vegas last Friday. "This is one of the most special evenings for me in my life," Angel said, "and I can not think of a more beautiful person, a more special person, inside and out, than Holly to spend it with." [People]

• Another day, another endorsement: this time, Tyra Banks has declared her support for Barack Obama. So congratulations, Senator! You're still in the running to becoming America's Next Top Elected Official! [E Online]

• Sad news: Pulitzer-prize winning author Studs Terkel has died at the age of 96. [NY Times]

• More sad news: John Daly, the Academy Award-winning producer of "Platoon," has died at the age of 71. [NYTimes]

• Ricky Gervais is apparently a big fan of symphonies, claiming that "nothing quite moves me like classical music." Not even "Freelove Freeway?"[Mirror]

• One Day At A Time star Mackenzie Phillips, who has struggled with drug addiction in the past, pled guilty to cocaine possession on Friday and has been ordered to attend a drug rehab program. [Reuters]

• The new James Bond film, Quantum of Solace, has broken the one-day British box office record with opening day sales reaching approximately eight million dollars. The previous record holder? Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. [Reuters]

• Jessica Simpson had to take her best friend and hair stylist Ken Paves to the hospital yesterday after a member of the paparazzi accidentally hit Paves in the eye with a camera. [TMZ]

• Cher's doctors are urging her to take a break from performing until at least January, due to "asthma-related bronchitis." [Daily Express]

• Jada Pinkett Smith has swapped gym workouts for yoga. "Right now I just do yoga maybe three times a week," Pinkett says, "As I've gotten older the gym's just not good on my joints anymore. I do a lot of activities outside. I do a lot of hiking, I love to run a little bit, I'm surfing now... I've got to keep up with my kids." [Daily Express]

• Are Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty over? "Friends" are reporting that Getty's refusal to divorce his wife of 8 years may have something to do with it. You think? [Daily Mail]

• Lauren Conrad is On The Move, Azlan-style. After a prolonged period of alleged laziness, Conrad is promoting her eponymous clothing line all over our fifty states. [Yahoo]
• According to this Sun columnist's "hunch," Kate Moss is pregnant. Take that for what it's worth. [The Sun]
• According to model Niki Taylor — and her husband, doctor and uterus' hunch — she's pregnant too! [People]
• Fashiongate FAQ. [Washington Post]

• More signs of economic apocalypse: the cancellation of Fashion Rocks, CondeNast's annual fashion-rock concert-magazine. [AdAge]
• Here's how to get those undecided swing voters! "On Thursday morning, (Zac) Posen filmed a 15-second video urging people to vote, to vote for Barack Obama, and to dress for the occasion." [WWD]
• L'Oreal keeps its head above water, but cuts forecasts. [WSJ]
• There's hedging your bets, and then there's...this. In case they don't get Runway back, Bravo's introducing Fashion House, Celebrity Sew-Off and The Fashion Show, which sounds suspiciously like a Project Runway where viewers choose the winner. [Yahoo]
• Kate Moss, friend, rumored to be dressing up as Tina Turner, Cher for Halloween, kicks. [Fashionologie]
• "Where would Moss be without her languidly rockish locks?" Um, I don't know. Anyway, her hairdresser is releasing a budget line of hair products. So that we can continue to look nothing like her, on the cheap! [Guardian]
• Ferragamo does all the beautiful, 40s-style shoes for the epic film Australia. [W]
• As an army of Bettys and Joans can tell you tonight, Mad Men has had a serious influence on fashion. [LA Times]
• Charlotte Ronson for J.C. Penney is predictably darling. [Nylon]
• Speaking of cute fast fashion: Old Navy's latest plus-sized line is really pretty. [Fabsugar]
• On the other side of economic divide, Balenciaga's Nicolas Ghesquière ditches his celeb moddles. [New York Magazine]
• And the head of Chanel: “Even in tough times, people want to see beautiful and inspirational things." [Economist]
• Rami Kashou lectures at the Phillips Collection. Quoth the master-draper: "I want to talk about what it takes to keep a dream alive...What it's like to be a 5-year-old and have a dream." [Washington Post]
• Bottega Veneta gets into cruisewear. Believe it or not, more frequent collections is actually a Recession-proofing measure. [WWD]

• OMG. This may make you hyperventilate: Mad Men's Jon Hamm is in talks to do a multi-episode arc on 30 Rock. The man known as Don Draper could be Liz Lemon's neighbor and a potential love interest for Tina Fey's character. Breathe. Just breathe. [EW]
• Jennifer Lopez sued her first husband, former waiter Ojani Noa, for writing a tell-all book about their relationship; it violated a 2002 confidentiality agreement. Inside: details about her "multiple duplicitous sexual affairs" behind Noa's back (including a tryst with Marc Anthony while he was married to ex-Miss Universe Dayanara Torres). Anywhoozle, an L.A. judge has awarded Ms. Lopez $545,000, because she really needs the money. How Mr. Noa is gonna get it is another question. [E!]
• Today in Madonna/Guy Ritchie news: She "bombards him" with "weird" texts and says "you're going down." Meanie! [Mirror]
• Madonna had a "secret helicopter trip" to visit A-Rod less than a week after her split from Guy Ritchie, and they met at Jerry Seinfeld's mansion in the Hamptons. Yeah, I dunno. [The Sun, TMZ]
• Wait, apparently The Seinfelds have been friends with Madonna for years. [Page Six]

• Jennifer Hudson's family has announced a new organization: The Hudson-King Foundation for Families of Slain Victims is named in honor of the singer-actress's slain mother Darnell Hudson Donerson, brother Jason Hudson and nephew Julian King. "The specific purpose of the Foundation is to care for the needs of families who have lost relatives to a violent crime," the family says in a statement. "This encompasses their basic needs of food, clothing and shelter as well as grief counseling." The foundation is accepting donations, click for the address. [People]
• New details: Police believe Jennifer Hudson's nephew was shot in the SUV in which he was found. William Balfour, who is Julian's stepfather, has refused to take a lie-detector test and has stopped cooperating with detectives. [MSNBC]
• Jennifer Hudson was on vacation with fiancé David Otunga in Florida when her sister Julia called her with the news. Jennifer is on the cover of People this week. [USA Today]
• A source says Jennifer Hudson is "still in shock," "hasn't gone out much at all" and "has lots of security around her." She is holed up in a hotel in Chicago and has not been seen in public since identifying her nephew's body on Monday. [Yahoo News]
• Not only is Joaquin Phoenix retiring from Hollywood, he's moving away: He just put his Hollywood Hills home on the market. So long, burning hot bird. [TMZ]
• Uh-oh: Yesterday Jermaine Jackson said that there would be a Jackson 5 reunion with both Michael and Janet; today Michael says: "My brothers and sisters have my full love and support, and we’ve certainly shared many great experiences, but at this time I have no plans to record or tour with them. I am now in the studio developing new and exciting projects that I look forward to sharing with my fans in concert soon." Hey, Jermaine, before you announce that Michael is touring with you, you probably should check with Michael. [Perez Hilton, Reuters]
• Here's a profile of the two guys who are running the Brooklyn restaurant Heath Ledger had planned to open: "The actor truly lived the New York experience. He taught his daughter how to skateboard. He rode his bike over the Williamsburg Bridge. He visited farmer’s markets. He played chess in Washington Square Park, and he brought coffee for the paparazzi. 'He really just took New York and rolled with it,' Mr. Mongell said. 'He was just one of us, man.'" [NY Times]
• Photographer Timothy White has published a book called Hollywood Pinups, in which stars like Ashley and Mary-Kate Olsen, Kate Hudson, Vanessa Williams and Susan Sarandon pose in classic vintage Vargas girl style. [LA Times]
• Brooke Shields is thinking about adopting, but she won't go outside the U.S.: "There are a lot of babies out there in our immediate back yard that need families." [Daily Express]
• Did you know that Wilmer Valderramma had an animated show on the Disney Channel? He speaks to JustJared "exclusively" about the show in a fairly boring interview. [Just Jared]
• Mick Jagger's daughter Elizabeth is being forced to move out of her New York apartment; the owner decided to put it on the market. Elizabeth will find a new place and paint it black. [Daily Express]
• It's the end of the road for Fox show King Of The Hill: It's not being renewed past its current 13th season. [UPI]
• If you want to see John Mayer sing Stevie Wonder's "Love's In Need Of Love Today" and dedicate it to Barack Obama, click here. [E!]
• In this interview, Quantum Of Solace Bond Girl Olga Kurylenko says stuff like: "I’m not a romantic person" and "Most of my life I’ve been alone" and, growing up in poverty in the little Ukrainian town of Berdyansk, "I ate cabbage my whole childhood. My mother said it was good for my breasts, but I think she lied." [Mirror]
• John McCain on Saturday Night Live this weekend? Maybe. [MSNBC]
• Margaret Cho's had to cancel shows because she is "unbelievably sick." Get well! [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which blockbuster director has only himself to blame for his recent burglary? After a hard day of filming, he decided to unwind with a couple of prostitutes who stole his valuables." [Page Six]
• Jennie Garth on the new Melrose Place: "I don't want to do it." Heh. Tell us how you really feel, Jen! [E!]
• Melissa Etheridge's 9-year-old son on California's Proposition 8, which would ban same sex marriage: "Wow, that's lame." From the mouths of babes! [People]
• Punky Brewster Soleil Moon Frye renewed her wedding vows. Damn, her kids are cute. [People]
• Rachael Ray's magazine is totally voting for Obama. [TMZ]
• Ryan Seacrest on Jennifer Hudson: "I always liked her spirit, her strength, her charm, her charisma. She's a strong girl and a special girl." [People]
• Look at this picture of 10-year-old Keira Knightley! She was in a cop show called The Bill. [The Sun]
• Some people are supporting Russell Brand after he was fired for making a nasty joke on his radio show; others are attacking him. [Daily Mail]
• Simon Cowell lost "Most Popular Talent Show Award" at the National Television Awards, so he went out and got drunk. But actually, everyone was drinking, it was an after party. Sheesh. [The Sun]
• Actress Michelle Yeoh and 1,000 Vietnamese children marched in Hanoi yesterday to promote motorcycle helmets. The weird thing is, she's not wearing one in the picture accompanying this story. Maybe so you know she's the star and not a schoolkid? [Yahoo News]
• Sean Connery denies that he's coming out of retirement for one last film. Maybe he could just do some voicemails? Love that Scottish burr! [Daily Express]
• Four ooky, spooky words: Addams Family, The Musical! [NY Mag]
• Financial markets may be down, but the prices of James Bond memorabilia? Up! "License to make a killing." [Reuters]
• "My health is great but there's a wind thing that blows there [in Las Vegas] at different months and I have an allergy to it. If I had cancer everyone would know it. I wouldn't tell them, but somebody would. When you have those kind of things happen if you're famous you can't keep them a secret. [The reports] don't make me angry. People have been saying the weirdest things since I was a teenager." — Cher, on the rumor that she canceled a Caesar's Palace show because she has cancer. [Daily Express]
• "She is very pregnant. I am on call permanently right now. She's at the very end, and it could happen at any point. She (feels) hot all the time. I think she wants to just be not pregnant anymore. It's a struggle to go up and down the stairs. Going out in public is insane." — Pete Wentz, on Ashlee Simpson. [People]
• "It used to be that when you got into the first team then the rewards would come, whereas young kids these days are earning so much money at such a young age. You want that hunger there, you want the hunger to be rewarded. Unfortunately, that's not the case these days. They can all afford to buy their own cars. That's the bad part - to have that at such a young age." — David Beckham, on overpaid young athletes. [Perez Hilton]
• "I'm sure these kids in bands think they're rock stars these days, and I'm sure they are to a certain extent. To me, there's a lot of people making music in bands and there's not so many rock stars around. And I don't know what it is, mate. I think they're trying too fucking hard and it's coming across really fake." — Liam Gallagher. [Rolling Stone]
• "[Marriage licences] should be like dog licences. I think you should have to renew marriage licences, unless you have children. And I think before you have children you should have to go and pass various tests and get a licence to have a child. Because it's the most transformative and difficult thing of your life." — John Cleese. [Telegraph]
• "I think giving birth to a child, as a woman, is what we're born to do. I don't mean that to sound sexist, because many women don't get to do it, and I thought I was one of them. But at the same time, if you are given that gift, it's an extraordinary thing. Bella and Connor are 15 and 13, so we've taken them, Tom and I, almost into their adult life. To then have a birth child that I have to take into adult life, give her her wings, it's a big purpose. I know my place. Put it that way." —Nicole Kidman, talking about Sunday Rose and her other kids, in Parade. [Perez Hilton]
• "I was taken aback when I met her. I thought she was one of the most beautiful women I'd seen. I thought: 'Wow! Whoever goes out with that girl is one lucky guy!' A month into our relationship, she told me she was pregnant, but was no longer with the father. I told her it didn't change the way I felt about her. Apart from being my wife, she's also my best friend." — Seal, on Heidi Klum. [Daily Mail]

• The crew on Madonna's world tour is threatening to quit because they had to stay at a cheap airport hotel while she stayed in an £11,000-a-night castle. It cannot be confirmed whether or not Her Madgesty said, "Let them eat cake." [Mirror, WOW Report]
• Here's the latest on David Duchovny: He may have had an addiction to online porn. And he may have released a statement about it because he was already in treatment and a fellow patient was about to sell info to the tabloids. [Fox News]
• Looking back at old interviews, Duchovny revealed his love of porn and '80s porn stars. [People]
• Meanwhile, Tea Leoni has canceled her appearance at the Toronto Film Festival. [People]
• Lindsay Lohan hung out with Sam Ronson instead of going to her grandfather's wake on Long Island. [The Sun]
• Lindsay signed a MySpace message "This song is for SR… ILY." Translation: "This song is for Sam Ronson. I love you." [Pop Dirt]
• Are Queen Latifah and her long time partner Jeanette Jenkins planning on adopting? Are they out now? [ONTD]

• Some dude's been arrested for stealing a digital camera that had pictures of Kate Middleton and Prince William vacationing in Mustique together. The camera belonged to Kate's little sister Pippa and the guy intended to sell the snaps to the tabloids, obvs. [Daily Mail]
• Kevin Spacey: Seen pinching the bare bottom of some dude. [Mr. Paparazzi, via Perez Hilton]
• Says a witness: "Kevin looked like he was having a brilliant time." [The Sun]
• Elisabeth Hasselbeck of The View is heading to the Republican National Convention on Thursday. She'll fly in and out on the same day. "I must really want John McCain elected," she says, "because I would not get on a plane like that for anyone else." Oh, the sacrifice! Thank God McCain has you. [NY Daily News]
• The apocalypse is nigh: Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are opening a bar. In NEW YORK. To be called The Hill. [W]
• Save Katie! The anti-Scientology group Anonymous will be protesting at opening night of Katie Holmes' Broadway debut in All My Sons. "We aren’t looking to shut it down, we just want to prove a point," says a spokesperson. [MSNBC]
• Josh Hartnett and and unnamed female friend went into a little-used library at a SoHo hotel and started getting "hot and heavy." Since the hotel — and the library — are under security camera surveillance, the staff saw a little show on a monitor. No video link, sorry! [MSNBC]
• Michael Phelps shot a cameo for the new season of Entourage. "It was like being in New York City with one of the Beatles," Kevin "E" Connolly says. "People were stopping in the streets and climbing up things to see him. They were going nuts. He's like a superstar." [Yahoo News]
• Meanwhile, Michael Phelps is totally not talking about the ladies and doing his best to have some privacy: "I never said I have a girlfriend, and I never said I don't have a girlfriend," he says. [People]
• DNA evidence has linked an air conditioning repairman to the 2001 stabbing death of Ashley Ellerin, Ashton Kutcher's former girlfriend. [Yahoo News]
• Johnny Depp was on stage with his old band! One night only! He played guitar and sang backup! It was for charity. [Yahoo News]
• This was probably inevitable but still: Oy: Agyness Deyn is working on a Hollywood career. [Daily Mail]
• Not that you asked, but Britney has been working out "super hard" and is in "great shape." [Page Six]
• Angelina Jolie would like to work on a European film. "No one has asked me yet," she says. "When I can really speak it, maybe I'll try out for a French film in a few years." [Breitbart]
• Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty: Moving in together? They looked at a $22 million mansion in Malibu and Sienna liked it. (At that price point, what's not to like?) [Perez Hilton]
• Maroon 5's Adam Levine: Seen hitting on newly single Anne Hathaway at the Vanity Fair DNC party. Uh-oh, isn't Adam on that herpes chart? [Fox News]
• James Gandolfini, 46, married his fiancée Deborah Lin, 40, in her hometown of Honolulu, Hawaii on Saturday. "They both wore long, green leis around their necks," says a source. "There were lots of white flowers on the tables and Gandolfini was beaming." [People]
• French actress Emmanuelle Beart and director Fabrice Du Welz are defending their latest movie, Vinyan, in which Beart stars as a mother who loses her son to the 2004 tsunami but refuses to believe he is dead. The character and her husband go looking for the kid in the jungle of the Thai-Myanmar border and stumble across a terrifying world ruled by savage children. It's a horror film, but the director says, "I tried to be as respectful as I can. I don't want to be unpleasant to people who have really suffered from the tsunami." [Yahoo News]
• John Mayer got really drunk and partied with a blonde cocktail waitress on the last night of his world tour. On stage, he mentioned reading The Secret and said "I had a conversation recently, and a lot of tears were exchanged." Jen Aniston, sniff, sniff. [People]
• This is just coming out now, but apparently Amy Winehouse overdosed twice last year: Once in July, from smoking hash for 36 hours; next in August from cocaine, heroin, ecstasy, ketamine and crystal meth. Now she might have brain damage or schizophrenia from the drugs. [The Sun]
• Another "Amy Winehouse may have brain damage" story. [Daily Mail]
• Headline of the day: "Could Scarlett Be The Next Spielberg?" Yes, Ms. Johansson wants to direct. [Daily Express]
• Mel Gibson has become "close to" a "glamorous Russian musician" on the set on his new movie but he says she's just a colleague and he remains happily married. [Daily Mail]
• The stage musical version of 9 To 5 features 19 new Dolly Parton songs. "She's so lovely and so humble," producer Robert Greenblatt says. "She says, 'I'm not sure I'll get you the whole way there, but I'd love to give it a try. If something doesn't work exactly, I'll rewrite it.'" [Variety]
• Colin Farrell saved this homeless guy's life by giving him cash and telling him: "You need to get your life together, man, promise me. And make sure you go see my new movie." [Toronto Sun]
• Jude Law is visiting Afghanistan to promote peace. Yeah, I dunno. [AP]
• Sign of the recession? Diddy had to give up his private jet. [The Star]
• Natalie Portman won a humanity award at the Venice Film Festival, where she made her directorial debut with a short film called Eve. [The Star]
• Duran Duran fan? Maybe you wanna read about how cocaine destroyed the band. Written by Andy Taylor! [Daily Mail]
• Sixty-two year old Cher has a 36 year old man and she hired a private jet to fly him and two of his buddies to Memphis to catch a Merle Haggard show, which is kind of awesome. [Page Six]
• Michelle Williams and Spike Jonze: Still on. [Page Six]
• Leanne Rimes, 26, has been married for seven years, and says she is ready for a baby. [People]
• "You are bugging the fuck out… No disrespect. …Alaska? I don't even know if there's any black people in Alaska. If you really think we're gonna let you win the election with these crazy decisions that you're making, you're bugging." —Diddy's thoughts about Sarah Palin in a video directed to John McCain. [Perez Hilton]
• Jerry O'Connell says pregnant wife Rebecca Romjin craves lemonade and soy cream cheese. "Can't be cream cheese. Soy cream cheese. Do you know how difficult it is to find soy cream cheese? It's usually in the corner of the supermarket someplace!" [People]
• "The easiest sex scene I have done was in Mulholland Drive because it was with another woman. There was no awkwardness. There was no sexual tension." — Naomi Watts. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "When it comes to fashion, I know about as much as Betty. I love to play dress-up and it’s fun, but I’m not interested in the fashion world. If I wasn’t an actress, I’d probably want to be a teacher." — America Ferrera. [Mirror]
• "I always knew I was never the prettiest or ugliest girl in the room. Life's too short to inject botulism into you face to get rid of a tiny line because you've laughed too much. I don't feel a need to lose weight, because I'm not 21. I'm happy with my package." — Ashley Jensen, aka Christina on Ugly Betty. [Daily Mail]
• "It's very strange to be here in London without Anthony Minghella, whom I loved very much, and very painful. I was so frightened in the first week of shooting The English Patient, I was trembling, but he was trying to find a way to win my trust, and he just said to me, 'Well, fly...' and I did and it changed my life." — Juliette Binoche. [Independent]
• "Victoria and I are very different. People bracket us together because we live in the same city and we’re both interested in fashion. Victoria’s fashion line has been very successful and, hopefully mine will be too. But that’s where the similarities begin and end." —Melanie "Scary Spice" Brown. Not that you knew she had a fashion line. [Daily Mail]
• "The only thing I can cook really is mince meat, which is ironic because I'm a vegetarian. But I like calzone and lasagne. I cooked every day in Spain so David and the boys lived off minced meat for four years. I cook a Sunday dinner every single Sunday I'll have you know. My kids like Yorkshire pudding so I make that, I can make it from scratch and I make Dora the Explorer cakes for afters because the kids love them." — Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham. [Daily Mail]
• "I can't even think about having another baby right now. The boys take up so much of my time." — Victoria Beckham. [Mirror]
• "I don't care for [romantic comedies] where the guy is emasculated, tossed around by the woman, and lacking a point of view. It's a disservice to both the male and the female. I like to give my guys some balls" - Matthew McConaughey to Plenty magazine. [Page Six]
• "I kind of want to see how the audience responds first. I don't want to overstay my welcome." — Shannen Doherty, on whether she will stick with the new 90210. [LA Times]
• "I informed British Airways of my late arrival. I told them I was a kind of minor celebrity and I might get a bit of hassle at the airport. Turns out they are complete arseholes. Even when I fell over and badly creased my hat, I had no assistance. I was crying but I didn't want them to see. A cynic might say I missed the plane, an honest man might say I went to the airport a little late." —Pete Doherty. [Mirror]
• "I think manipulation is something that women do a lot, it's still our number one problem. You look at those characters [in The Duchess] — Georgiana and Bess — and they're hugely trying to outmanoeuvre each other, but I think it's also possible for intense love affairs to happen between women — not necessarily sexual, but things can obviously take a sexual turn. Women do get obsessed with other women — whether they love them or hate them, and I think that line is very easy to cross." — Keira Knightley [Guardian]

• A Britney Spears/Justin Timberlake duet! In the works! [Page Six]
• Jennifer Garner has confirmed that she is expecting her second child. But you knew that. "It always makes me laugh when people say 'Is she?' 'Isn't she?' It's like eventually you will know, so just chill out for a minute," she says. [People]
• Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt plan on hosting a soirée — as suggested by the mayor (?!?!) in their town in Southern France. They want to get to know the locals and be good neighbors and all that. [Daily Express]
• Matt Damon and his wife welcomed their second daughter into the world on Wednesday. Her name is Gia Zavala Damon. [Reuters]
• Details on Madonna's Sticky & Sweet tour: 100 pairs of out of stock fishnet, pantyhose in old style weave, purchased for Madonna via ebay and local dance shops; 12 traveling trampolines, 3 Romanian gypsy musicians, 1 chiropractor, 1 personal trainer, 1 masseuse. Four sections of the "journey": Pimp, old school, gypsy and rave. [Perez Hilton]
• Hot new L.A. property: Paparazzi-proof condo. [U.S. News & World Report]
• Nasty blind item! "Which two perky Olympian teammates are really bitter rivals? One spiked the other's protein shake with laxatives before a big competition, but her plan backfired when her nemesis not only powered through the competition but beat her so-called friend anyway." [Rush & Molloy]

• Three adult patients died unexpectedly and a teenage patient was raped at Aurora Las Encinas Hospital, the Pasadena psychiatric facility known for its association with celebrity physician Dr. Drew Pinsky. [L.A. Times]
• Is Jodie Foster making nice with her ex-partner, Cydney Bernard, so she doesn't have to pay her $25 million in alimony? [Perez Hilton]
• Lindsay Lohan's bralessness makes headlines. [The Sun]
• Sam and Lindsay "fled the scene" of Sam's birthday party Tuesday night, because there were too many photographers. [Page Six]
• Courtenay Semel, Lindsay's alleged "first girlfriend" wound up in jail in Vegas Tuesday night after a drunken altercation with security. She's dating Tila Tequila now, btw. [Page Six]
• Catherine Zeta-Jones attended the funeral of her grandmother, Zeta, today in Swansea, UK. [The Sun]
• 90210 promo: Shannen Doherty asks, "Miss me?" [ET]
• Tori Spelling on 90201: "As of now there are no plans for me to be on the show. I hope it turns out to be a really great show, just for my dad’s legacy." [People]
• Blake Lively responds to that video clip of America Ferrera rolling her eyes! Blake says: "I haven't even heard about it. I don't ever pay attention to that stuff. She's one of my best friends in the whole world and honestly, when you're sitting in a room for three hours doing satellite interviews — we were staring at a Post-It with a smiley face — so I think I probably rolled my eyes a hundred times." [EW]
• Uh-oh, music mogul Damon Dash owes $7.3 million in mortgage payments on two Manhattan apartments. Foreclosure proceedings have begun! Where is (former Roc-A-Fella Records partner) Jay-Z when you need him? [Rolling Stone]
• Someone's suing Salma and Sami Hayek. Investment deal gone bad. [TMZ]
• Peaches and Bob Geldof have smoothed things over by going for tapas in Majorca. Crimminy. I wish I were in Majorca right now. [The Sun]
• Rhys Ifans started a drunken brawl at gf Kimberley Stewart's birthday party. Apparently some dude tried to chat up Kim, and Rhys screamed: "Fuck off, don't touch my bird! Let's take this outside, you think you're a big man." Haha, wow. [Mirror]
• James McAvoy has landed the lead role in Gnomeo And Juliet, in which he is a garden gnome who falls in love with an ornament. [Mirror]
• Cher helped Bill Clinton celebrate his birthday Monday in Vegas. Do you believe in life after love? [Page Six]
• Is Oprah sick of being on the cover of O magazine? [Page Six]
• An animated Amy Winehouse stars in a new online game called "Escape From Rehab." The goal: To get out of a clinic and rescue Blake Incarcerated from jail. Your weapons: A beehive, a crack pipe and a syringe. Sigh. [The Sun]
• Jason Wahler's upcoming civil trial could dig up some dirt, like his battles with alcohol and substance abuse, his previous arrests and the time he called the plaintiff, a tow-truck driver, the N-word. [E!]
• Angie Harmon and Jason Sehorn: Expecting baby number 3. [AP]
• Jerry Seinfeld will be the new celebrity pitchman for Microsoft and appear in ads with Bill Gates. Will the campaign be better than the Apple commercials with Justin "I'm a Mac" Long? Uh, if by better you mean nerdier, then, yes. [WSJ]
• James Brown's children, the woman who says she's his last wife, and the state of South Carolina are nearing a settlement over the late soul singer's estate. There should be an inheritance for 6-year-old James Brown II, who had to take a DNA test in April. Hopefully, he feels good. [USA Today]
• Gary Glitter returned to Thailand after being refused entry to Hong Kong. He's in some kind of international limbo. [Guardian]
• Coming to theaters August 29: Mamma Mia!: The Sing-Along Edition, with lyric subtitles. Plug your ears or join in! [MSNBC]
• "Mr. President, are you aware/Our flesh and blood is dying over there?/When the coffins come back, do you care?/When only the poor kids die, is it fair?/Don't get me wrong. I respect the flag/But it hurts to see a kid in a body bag/He fought for his country with all he had/Now we have a family without a dad." — LL Cool J's new track, "Mr. President." [Rush & Molloy]
• "I wish I had been nude from the time I was 12 until I was 28. I looked great! I want to tell all young girls to walk around in bikinis all summer — and enjoy it. I want to tell them to never, ever feel bad about anything, because there will be that one day in your 20s when you’ll eat a hamburger and actually see the hamburger on the side of your leg." —Jennifer Love Hewitt. [MSNBC]
• "I love horses. I've learned from them. Once you master a horse — but it also masters you — you gain more confidence in yourself. [Riding horses] has a rhythm that's rather Zen-like. When you can mount it and move it and move along with it, that is a hard-won and very real accomplishment." —Christian Bale. [Yahoo News]
• "I won’t say I’m never going to do drugs again. I just know I’m not a good person on drugs." — Lily Allen. [The Sun]
• "The majority of times I go to the cinema, I want a bit of everything. I want to be challenged intellectually, and then again I don't want to be too challenged intellectually. I believe my wife to be very creative so of course I'm interested in how she thinks, and there seems to be no end to the desire to be creative; I find that invigorating and interesting. You know, you have conversations, some deep, some shallow. That's the same in everybody's relationship." —Guy Ritchie. [Telegraph]
• "I don't think running for office is anything I'm prepared for or could even prepare myself for. I work really long hours and work a lot and have done press tours and junkets, but there is nothing like a presidential campaign that I have experienced before... I think at one point we visited three different cities in one state in 12 hours. It's exhausting." — America Ferrera on campaigning for Hillary Clinton with Chelsea Clinton. [E!]

[Los Angeles, July 26. Image via INFDaily]

• Did Mariah Carey have an eye job or something? She won't walk down the red carpet without her sunglasses. If so, it's probably not her first procedure; her nose and boobs seem to have changed in the past few years. [Page Six]
  
• Also: Mariah's been wearing a giant ring that gossipers want you to think is engagement-esque. And she's been hanging with Nick Cannon. [People]
  
• David Bowie and Iman's 7-year-old daughter, Alexandria, listens to Hilary Duff songs, at which point "David just leaves the room," Iman says. "He thinks she should be listening to underground music." [ONTD]

• Amy Winehouse says she's not cheating on her hubby: "Me and Blake are meant for each other, he's my man." [Mirror]
• But, um, apparently Blake Incarcerated thinks she's divorcing him and wants £3 million. These tears dry on their own. [The Sun]
• But Amy denies having an affair. [Daily Mail]
• Ashley Alexandra Dupre is suing Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis. Her statement claims that she was offered alcoholic drinks and "once intoxicated, she was induced into exposing her breasts while being filmed and told to sign a 'release' form." She was 17 at the time and not "legally competent" to enter a into a contract. She's seeking $10 million. [ET]
• Joe Francis says: "To show my appreciation, I'm sending Ashley a dozen cupcakes from Magnolia (Bakery)- assorted with sprinkles along with a card attached that says thanks for the free publicity." [Rush & Molloy]
• So yeah, Britney's back on How I Met Your Mother. Abby, the "sassy office assistant," will try and get revenge on her crush, Ted, since he's dating her boss. Yawn. [Yahoo News]
• Meanwhile, Brit's Child Custody Evaluation report, which is "several hundred" pages long, is both damaging and encouraging for Britney. [TMZ]
• Jamie Lee Curtis says of Miley's pix: "I only wish that her guardians had protected her." [People]
• Bill O'Reilly on Miley Cyrus's Vanity Fair pix: "If you have a billion dollar franchise, you don't throw it away." And what about the millions of Hannah Montana-loving kids? [Perez Hilton]
• Kathy Griffin and Apple billionaire Steve Wozniak: Dunzo. "As a matter of fact, I got an email last week from him, and he is going to marry someone else," Kathy says. "I think he might be married. I don't really know that for sure, though." [WOW]
• Tracy Ullman plays Dina Lohan on her show, State Of The Union, and says: "I think I need to get bigger, better teeth to play her... American teeth that will do her justice." [Page Six]
• Ludacris with lipstick on his collar sounds like a song. [E!
• Jason "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" Segel: Seen making out with soap star Adrienne Frantz. [Page Six]
• Kristin Bell still has her Catholic high school uniform. "I tucked that away when I was 18," she says. "I'm going to wear it on my wedding night." [Page Six]
• Pamela Anderson is now an American citizen. [Page Six]
• Dancing With The Stars' Christian de la Fuente was rushed to the hospital after being injured while dancing with Cheryl Burke. He got hurt dancing. [TMZ]
• Rocker Scott Weiland has been sentenced to 192 hours in county jail for his November DUI arrest. Good luck! [TMZ]
• Shenae Grimes, who plays Darcy on Degrassi: The Next Generation, will be joining the cast of the 90210 spinoff. I'll admit I used to watch D:TNG. The storyline where Darcy posed half naked in her cheerleader uniform and sold the pictures to some guy over the internet was crazytown. [ET]
• Is Ryan Seacrest going to get kicked off of American Idol? [MSNBC]
• A documentary fronted by Duchess of York Sarah Ferguson — in which she plays "lifestyle coach" — might be dropped from the UK's ITV after one of the participants was arrested following the discovery of the body of an 18-year-old man in her apartment. [Variety]
• Victoria Beckham's boobs are gone. Isn't that old news? [The Sun]
• Mel Gibson will be in his first feature film since 2002. He'll play a police investigator. Wouldn't it be awesome if the cop were a Jew? [Yahoo News]
• The guy accused of stalking Uma Thurman might not have broken any laws. "He loved her and possibly still does. He never wanted to annoy her, threaten her or alarm her," says his lawyer. "Creepy? Yes. Obsessed? Yes. Criminal? No." Uma is testifying in court today. [Reuters]
• Cher had a fling with Tom Cruise at the start of his career. She's 16 years older than he is! And there's a joke in there about Cher being popular with The Gays but it's best left alone. [Daily Mail]
• Janet Jackson's boobs are in the news again. She wasn't wearing a bra at the GLAAD awards and it was pretty obvious. [Daily News]
• Four words: Jimi Hendrix sex tape. Let me stand next to your fire! [NY Times]