Sarah Haskins in Target Women: Charm School [Current]

Earlier: All Sarah Haskins Posts
Condoms, Cleaning Supplies & Crap: A Q&A With Sarah Haskins

Says Maclean's:

The goal of Make-over Camp is to instill poise, grace and confidence in girls between the ages of 10 and 14. For two weeks, they will learn to improve their posture, voice, table manners, conversation skills, wardrobe choices, makeup application, hostessing skills and music appreciation. "We see a lot of young ladies who can benefit from a makeover program," said Angela Chan, director of Lambda and co-creator of the camp. "They need to develop their presence." Marc McCreavy, an industrial designer and interior decorator, will teach the girls how to host events and decorate a table. "It's important to learn about appropriate topics of conversation and appropriate attire," he said.

Concert pianist Wonny Song was inspired to found Make-over Camp after meeting a particularly poised 13-year-old at a Parisian soiree who assisted her parents with hosting and generally conducted herself with poise and maturity. Song wanted to inspire more young women to learn this self-confidence and these waning social graces. Why she interpreted this as needing a finishing school is totally mysterious.

And, not shockingly, many in Song's native Montreal are less than enthused about the concept, dubbing it "charm school," "wife camp," and all kinds of evil. Says one McGill professor, "I'm sorry, but I cannot call a charm school feminist... Yes, young girls lack confidence, as we know from studies and books about the Ophelia complex, but the way to solve it isn't to teach them how to be good hostesses!" Adds an irate mother, "It reinforces old, gendered expectations about ladylike behaviour...Reverting to that 1950s model of repressed housewives is a way of responding to the crisis of the average household-fractured by divorce and busy schedules."

Okay, bashing this ludicrous camp is almost too easy, so I'll save you the virtual ink. And here's the thing: a lot of what this camp teaches is important. Manners, social skills, poise - these are life skills, and ones that help increase self-confidence. The accomplishments that Song seems to have admired in that French girl - that of a young woman who can hold her own with adults, engage with them, look them in the eye - had next to nothing to do with "makeup application" or "table settings."

It's tragic that the only time we hear about stuff like manners or confident interaction with adults, they're being lumped in with such retrograde silliness, and approached in such an offensive and old-fashioned way. Because not only do these undermine the real lessons girls could be learning, but they allow people to dismiss this silly program out of hand, and ignore the few very real good things it emphasizes. This camp is at best silly, at worst offensive, and thanks to its charm-school absurdity, and its equation of "confidence" with "50s-style polish," pretty much wholly irrelevant. But it seems to me sad that genuine manners and social skills, which aren't silly, are being lumped in with it, and as a result dismissed. In essence: Song is totally wrong. But within that, there's a little right, and now no one will see that.

I'm not worried this is going to become some kind of revolution, because it's too absurd, and because it's a self-selecting parental population anyway. I also believe that a smart girl who ends up in such a place won't be brain-washed, because I happen to think more of young girls than The Media cares to. But I worry that between her reactionary exercise in charm and the reflexive 50's-bashing that's become one of the most irritating shorthand of modern rhetoric, we're missing a chance to talk about the fact that actual "poise and confidence" are traits that have absolutely nothing to do with makeup or makeovers - but can be taught and encouraged by treating young women with respect and dignity - and may have more modern application than either camp (pun intended) is acknowledging.

It's ‘Wife Camp' For 10-Year-o=Olds [Macleans]

Most of the women on this show have hard exteriors, which they admit contributes to a lot of their attitudes about fighting, their defensiveness, and in some cases, excessive drinking. When Bubbles revealed that she'd been molested, many of the women said that they had similar experiences in their pasts. They all came to a better understanding of each other — for this episode at least — and comforted one another in a rare but much-needed act of solidarity.

VH1 does not bleep out the word when it is first uttered, or when Ricki Lake talks about the incident, but bizarrely, when Ashley is rehashing the conversation in an interview segment, it is bleeped. Ashley was clearly using "retarded" in a very literal, and offensive, sense, but no matter where you stand on the issue in general, you can't deny the irony of the typo within the subtitle of that screen shot.

Last week, Ricki eliminated Kiki, a former cast member from Real Chance of Love. (Kiki's interview on VH1 Blog sheds some light on how she feels about this, saying that she's "pissed off.") Some of the contestants felt that, by doing this, Ricki was playing favorites toward the white women. In addition, the Real Chance girls were upset that Ashley (from Rock of Love Bus) called them "ghetto." In this clip, the entire group attempts to address these issues head-on.

1.) "Have you seen Latoya?" has never sounded so creepy, or incriminating.

2.) Paula Deen visited the Today show, refused to leave, spread her legs, and grabbed two fistfuls of her vagina. The clip is rather long, but worth every second.

3.) The Real Housewives of New Jersey appeared on The View on Friday. Jacqueline, who discussed her difficulty with fertility on the show this past week, is now pregnant, and due June 11.



Unfortunately my two faves, Danielle and Teresa were not present. Teresa, it turns out, is also with child.

4.) Are your kittens still alive?

5.) More traumatizing than dead kittens: Judge Judy has never been a feminist.



But the thing is, her definition of why she's not a feminist is actually very feminist. So, like Mormon people who baptize the dead, I will anoint Judge Judy as a feminist, and get on with my life already.

6.) Oh, and if you ever need to read her mind, just read the captions on Larry King Live.

7.) Technology is destroying families, and making fathers sad.

8.) George Hamilton gave Bridget a lesson on the cultural history of Miami. Then they bonded about tanning.

9.) Sometimes I feel exactly like this:

10.) UGH! Maya Angelou, don't give her any ideas!

The women on the show - the contestants or new host Ricki Lake - aren't saying (or aren't shown saying) that there is a black vs. white thing going on, but it really doesn't matter because the fighting is like a Matryoshka doll, where there is always something else nested within (e.g. drinkers vs. light drinkers, weaves vs. bad weaves, loud vs. quiet). While it's not exactly the light-hearted "fun" that Charm School had been in its previous two seasons — when stupid insults were thrown around while someone was being filmed sitting on the toilet and someone else was being filmed puking while her friends held her hair back — it'll be interesting to see how this unfolds.

What we saw on TV (and in the clip above) is vilified contestant Megan, wasted and wearing a string bikini with heels, saying something about Ozzy Osbourne that gets bleeped out, then Sharon pics up her drink, and dumps it on Megan. Jerry Springer-style quick editing shows security guards rush in and break it up, then the crowd cheers for Sharon, while all the other Charm School contestants rush the stage to gleefully congratulate Sharon.

What really happened is that Megan was indeed trashed, and after Sharon told her she should get spayed, Megan says something to the effect of, "As a celebrity manager, all you've managed to do is watch your husband's brain turn into a vegetable" or maybe she said "mush." But it was something along those lines. She definitely hit a nerve. But instead of a witty comeback, or rising above it, or having Megan thrown off stage, Sharon decided to dump a drink on her, and then repeatedly punched her, refusing to let go of her hair as security tried to pry them apart. (This was all bleeped and edited because of "legal reasons," which we've roughly translated into "Sharon doesn't want to appear to be the asshole that she is.") The irony is that the whole fight started because Sharon was mad that Megan didn't take the "lessons" of the show seriously, and she didn't learn anything about how to behave properly.

It's all a bunch of bullshit, and while I don't think that the VH1 reality universe is a particularly realistic or responsible one, I do think that it's disgusting for an audience to cheer on a grown woman as she wails on a drunken young woman in a bikini, who later was sent to the hospital for her injuries. It's disgusting to continue to pretend that Sharon is supposed to be a role model for these women, and that she's somehow better than they are. It's also disgusting that the other contestants rushed the stage during the fight, as though this was about someone getting their comeuppance, rather than it being about sour grapes because they're all pissed off that Megan got a deal to have a her own show on VH1.

Perhaps Rodeo hit the nail on the head — after she sat down on the couch to discuss her invention of waterproof jeans — when she said, "You know, Megan has never taken her show seriously. And I have. Every show I've ever been on with Rock of Love, I Love Money and Charm School, I take it very seriously."

Brandi M. took home the grand prize on last night's finale of Charm School, because the judges considered her to be the most changed for the better. (She went from being a gaseous stripper/porn star to a girl who could make speeches without note cards.) Runner up Destiney was awarded an internship at one Daniella Clarke's—one of the judges—stupid clothing line. For their final challenge, the final three contestants were supposed to help the homeless. It was fitting that they were assigned these three appropriately-dressed former contestants (Heather, Megan, and Brandi C.) to help them earn money on Hollywood Blvd.

Somehow, Megan looked more naked in this dress than she does in her string bikinis.

As for all the B.S. about how the Charm School judges helping the girls be more ladylike, don't worry, because if learning by example is any indication, these women won't be ruined from reality TV forever. At the reunion taping, Sharon Osbourne beat the crap out of Megan, who later went to the hospital.

20.) Bobby Brown Farts On Carnie Wilson, Pees On Dee Snider
Bobby Brown took a half-hearted stab at earning a pay check and having a country music career via the reality show Gone Country, in which he lived with other out-of-work celebs down South and competed for a record contract. In this clip, he gets drunk, eats ribs, farts and pees.

19.) Teen Bathes, Then Bonds With Senior Citizen
Baby Borrowers was a social experiment in the form of a reality show that was supposed to teach teenagers how hard it is to raise a family and run a household. For some reason, one of the episodes called for the teens to care for senior citizens, maybe to scare them off of the burden of dealing with elderly parents later on down the road. In this clip, a teen has to bathe her senior ward, and then they have a touching conversation about the generational differences of filing nails square or rounded.

18.) Meet The Two Most Effective Forms Of Birth Control
Some episodes of Supernanny are scarier than horror movies. In this clip, two little terrors defiantly pick their noses and wipe the boogers on a wall, physically abuse their mother and say terrifying things like, "I have a dick and a weenie in my weenie," and "I'm gonna fuck you in your privates one day!"

17.) Vagina Insults Are The New "Ya Momma"
MTV's That's Amore — the spin-off of Shot at Love with Tila Tequila — featured women who incessantly talked about other women's vaginas.

16.) American Idol Contestant Who Looks Like Willem Dafoe With Face Glitter
Alexis Cohen was one of those "bad" auditions featured during the open-call leg of American Idol. They're always easy targets, but her working knowledge of the English language and her literal glittery attempt at polishing a turd made her the best of the worst.

15.) Stage Mom Has Violent, Psychotic Outburst
Rocky, stage mother to Haley, from VH1's I Know My Kid's a star first won our hearts when she asked her daughter if her tampon string was visibly hanging below her miniskirt. This freak out sealed the deal.

14.) Woman With A Half Wig Cries About It
Kim from Real Housewives of Atlanta attracted attention and confusion over her hair — an obvious wig that did not match the color of the natural bangs in the front. Her attempt at clearing the matter up (she had cancer!) only confused everyone more (wait, she only thought she had cancer!).

13.) Pussylicious
The reality show in which women compete for a spot (that's actually never given to them) in the the Pussycat Dolls lineup was called Pussycat Dolls Present: Girlicious, which obviously needed to be shortened to "pussylicious." Especially after one girl's introduction included her saying, "I'm Cassandra. I'm from Aurora, Illinois, I live in Chicago now, and I have a tattoo of cherries on my hoo-ha." Later, another girl gets injured and is forced to dance in her wheelchair.

12.) Women Past Their Prime Audition For Modeling Competition
She's Got the Look was supposed to be America's Next Top Model for the over-35 set. In this clip its obvious that there were reasons beyond their age that have kept these women from working the runway.

11.) Corey Haim Doesn't Understand Why Everyone He Knows Wants Him To Go To Rehab
It's always ridiculous/sad when addicts who can't fully open their eyes or articulate words think that they are fooling everyone. It's double ridiculous when it's someone like Corey Haim who has had a long public history of drug addiction.

10.) Is This Lady's Husband Gay?
Alex and her husband Simon were the breakout stars of Real Housewives of New York. They were attached at the hip, obsessed with teaching their uncooperative children French, and dropped $20k on opera tickets even though their Brooklyn brownstone was literally falling apart. But the question on everyone's mind was whether or not Speedo-wearing Simon is gay or just simply European.

9.) Women Get Wasted, Puke, Break Dishes, & Hock Loogies
This scene from Charm School: Rock of Love was the most entertaining display of drunken behavior since Bret took the girls to Vegas on season one.

8.) Stripper Mom And Porn Star Have Threesome With Dude, While Another Girl Mistakes Couch For Toilet
Scratch that! This is the was the most entertaining display of drunken behavior, brought to us by those classy roommates of Bad Girls Club.

7.) Flavor Flav Draws The Line At Herpes
As though he doesn't have the virus himself.

6.) The Matchmaker & The Mafia
Intervention is supposed to be a poignant, serious show about addiction, however, some of the characters — like this Italian woman who comes from a family who is part of "The Family" — make us smile.

5.) Denise Richards Calls A Celebrity Journalist A Cunt
As much as Denise Richards: It's Complicated sucked, it was fun to see the real reason behind why the tabloids are so hard on her.

4.) Brooke Hogan Is A Sexist Moron
The irony of her show being titled Brooke Knows Best escaped no one. In this clip, she reveals that her thoughts on politics, and how women's menstrual cycles makes them unfit to serve as President.

3.) America's Next Top Model Is A Menstrual Show
Per Tyra Banks' advice, women should bend over and wince in pain, as though they have menstrual cramps, in order to look "editorial."

2.) Terrifying Texas Mom Shows "Pansy" Husband Who's Boss
Wife Swap is a reliable source when looking to investigate the weirdos of America.

1.) Bikini Corie
The best elimination speech in competition-based reality TV programming ever, courtesy of Paris Hilton's My New BFF.

Having to face a night at a bar dressed as unattractive women, the girls pre-gamed quite a bit before even leaving the house. There was some crying mixed in with flashing, mooning, ass spanking, and screaming — and this is all before they got to the bar and started doing tequila shots. Brandi C. ended up having a serious case of Duff Goggles and made out with some guy. We already knew what happened when the girls got home from the bar, and seeing this unaired footage totally explains how they got so shitcanned. In related news, the Charm School reunion was taped in L.A. this weekend and apparently things got intense. Insults were hurled, and Sharon Osbourne physically attacked Megan (the one who only wears bikinis), and, after going to the hospital, she pressed charges against Sharon. Nice going, teaching these wild women how to be "ladies", Shaz.

"Charm School" Chick: Sharon O. Attacked Me [TMZ]
Earlier: Charm School: Women Get Wasted, Puke, Break Dishes, & Hock Loogies