• Unsolicited uterus update: Nicole Richie is in labor!

She has been admitted to the hospital to give birth to her second child with Joel Madden. Details to come. [ET]

• Spoilery secrets from Sex And The City 2: Gay wedding! And Jesus on Manolos, if Miley Cyrus is in the movie that has got to be one of the signs of the apocalypse. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Cops rushed to Halle Berry's house yesterday when someone tripped an alarm on the property by accident. [TMZ]
• Janet Jackson will open the MTV Video Music Awards with a musical tribute to her brother, Michael Jackson. [USA Today]
• It's been decided: Michael Jackson's three children will not enroll at the school Tito's kids attend; they will continue to be home schooled by the same tutors they had under Michael's supervision. [TMZ]
• "Various members of Michael Jackson's family tell TMZ they are already talking about lawyers who might rep them in a wrongful death lawsuit against Dr. Conrad Murray… In California, Jackson's immediate family could sue for the economic loss they have suffered by Jackson's death — e.g., the financial support Jackson could have provided had he lived. Here's the problem — Jackson's death may actually be an economic gain. It's already becoming clear Michael Jackson is more profitable in death than he was in the last years of his life." [TMZ]
• Emma Watson's first days at Brown University: Not going so great. The paparazzi shot her doing orientation activities, and a Twitter user wrote: "My dad made Emma Watson mad by taking a photo of her going inside the Financial Aid office at Brown. She was with her mom & boyfriend." And now: A CNN story! [CNN]
• Rihanna's dad: Not too thrilled about Rihanna topless (but wearing pasties) in Italian Vogue: "The photo was disturbing," he told Us Weekly. He was, however, amused by Chris Brown on Larry King Live: "The costume he wore was so funny. That bow tie thing. He needs to bury that." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Uh-oh. According to this column, even though a judge ordered Chris Brown and Rihanna to stay away from each other, they can't. A source says "They spoke to their lawyers to see what was allowed, and are now planning two weeks in Mexico." As always, consider the source on this. [MSNBC via Britain's Star]
• Tila Tequila's lawyer claims that Shawne Merriman's version of events is "spin." In a statement, Tila's rep says: "Fortunately, we as a society will not tolerate a 6'4", 270 pound all-pro NFL linebacker physically assaulting a young lady who is 4'11" and 93 pounds. It is never justifiable to brutally assault, choke, strike and imprison a woman." [TMZ]
• Shawne Merriman's ex-girlfriend says "he never laid a hand on me" and "it's out of his character" to lash out at a woman. [TMZ]
• Kate Hudson was spotted wearing a diamond band on THAT finger, so speculation is that it's a meaningful gift from A-Rod. [Gatecrasher]
• Amy Winehouse's dad caught his daughter in bed with none other than "druggie and former jailbird" Blake Fielder-Civil. Mitch Winehouse allegedly threatened to "punch his lights out." [The Sun]
• Brody Jenner met with cops yesterday to make a statement about the altercation between his girlfriend Jayde Nicole and Girls Gone Wild mastermind Joe Francis. [Radar Online]
• Antonio Banderas told Ellen that knee operations after a skiing accident required Melanie Griffith to use narcotics again, which is why she went to rehab. Antonio says: "In March, she came to me and said, 'I'm feeling a little bit weak in my determination for this ... so I just thought to go to rehabilitation by myself. So the whole entire family is supporting her, and I am supporting her, and at this particular time more than ever. I'm very proud of her." [People]
• Jay-Z will perform at Madison Square Garden on Friday at a special September 11 benefit concert, and tickets — originally priced at $55 — are being scalped for $200 to $3,000. Jay says he's "disheartened." [AP]
• Yoko Ono allegedly told Britain's Sky News channel that the entire Beatles' music catalog will be made available on iTunes; then the news item was removed. Is an announcement imminent? [MSNBC]
• This report claims that the Yoko/iTunes story is untrue. [CBS News]
• Kourtney Kardashian baby shower "secrets" at the link. [People]
• Kourtney Kardashian's baby daddy, Scott Disick, hangs out with Kevin Federline. [Page Six]
• Pamela Anderson has been dating this electrician/surfer for a while now, but People calls it a "new shocker." [People]
• Pam Anderson plays a scantily clad security guard who strips passengers of animal products in a new PETA ad, which the CNN Airport Network has deemed too racy, saying "children make up part of the demographic in airports." [Page Six]
• Simon Cowell is planning a massive, $400,000 party for his 50th birthday, with Elton John, Kevin Spacey, Denise Richards and Donald Trump attending. [MSNBC]
• Robert Rodriguez is taking over Austin, Texas as his new flick, Machete, starts filming. Look for Jessica Alba, Robert De Niro, Michelle Rodriguez and, yes, Lindsay Lohan. [Page Six]
• Lil Wayne's North American tour grossed about $42 million and drew nearly 804,000 fans, making it the highest grossing hip-hop outing of the year — and the most lucrative rap tour that Billboard has ever tracked. Plus, that kind of cash buys a lot of whatever Weezy drinks out of that styrofoam cup. [Reuters]
• Halle Berry is in talks to star in action-thriller Dark Tide. Penned by Amy Sorlie, the story concerns a diving instructor who returns to the deep after a near-fatal incident with a Great White shark. [Variety]
• Rapper Eve was in the VIP area of a club when she got hungry, so she asked for "something vegetarian, like grilled cheese or chicken fingers." [Page Six]
• Everything you never wanted to know about Sydney Andrews, the Melrose Place character played by Laura Leighton. [People]
• Laura Krafft — who once worked for Stephen Colbert — will head the writing team for Wanda Sykes' new show. [Page Six]
• Spandau Ballet: Making a comeback. [Daily Mail]
• "For a while I thought, well, maybe I just don't want to work any more, or work now, because nothing was appealing to me. It actually was a little nerve-racking. But I read this and I thought: 'Here's something.'" — Edie Falco on Nurse Jackie. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "9/11 has been the pretext for the systematic dismantling of our Constitution and Bill of Rights… the official story behind 9/11 is a fraud" — Charlie Sheen. [Page Six]
• "The second time I had plastic surgery I got it done for free. People was covering it and I met a team of doctors that had a publicist who kept adding procedures. The guy who did my LASIK surgery wanted to do a 'tune-up' and now I've had five surgeries on my eye. I have partial blindness in one of my eyes, actually. It was very much like Nip/Tuck where they'd be like, 'Tell me what you don't like about yourself,' and then they'd draw all over you with markers to highlight your 'problem' areas. […] Besides, I actually have a theory that my original nose has grown back. I heard that your ears and nose continue to grow as you age so I think that I'm right back to where I started." — Kathy Griffin. [Time]
• "We never wanted to be parents, with all that entails: the loss of freedom, total dependency. I didn't have a work ethic for such a long time. Imagine if I had a child like me? I didn't start earning until I was 36. I'm the sort of person who has to check three times that I've shut the door, so I'd probably stare at a kid all day to check it was breathing." — Ricky Gervais on he and partner Jane Fallon's decision not to have children. [The Sun]
• "I'm not the kind of woman who waits a lot. [Laughs.] I take life as it is, and it just happened that my masseuse, Su-Man, asked me, 'Do you want to dance?' I was lying on the table having a massage, and I said, 'Yes.' Then I met with Akram, and they proposed, 'Do you want to do three days of trying something together?' But I never think of time, because when you're inside of your life, you don't think of time. It's a learning process with my body, and it's challenging, but I love it because it allows me to enter different worlds, spaces, and fears. I don't want to go to the same place. Otherwise, I'm bored." — Juliette Binoche, on In-I, a dance performance she choreographed with Akram Khan, in BAM's Next Wave Festival. [Village Voice]
• Q: Paparazzi get photos of celebrities doing pretty much everything, but they never seem to get pictures of stars after surgery. Why is that? A: Oh, there's a whole system you need to know about. First of all, the plastic surgeons in Beverly Hills all have secret celebrity doors. After the surgery, you leave the plastic surgeon's office covered in a sheet that's not unlike a burqa. Your assistant takes you to an upscale hotel where you hide in a dark room of shame until you're better. There are bandaged rich ladies walking around the hallways of the Four Seasons and the Peninsula in Beverly Hills right now. It's not unlike being a war criminal or a terrorist. — Kathy Griffin. [Time]

• To start this Memorial Day weekend, here's a picture of Robert Pattinson with his arm around a pretty blonde that is probably making the girl I saw wearing a "Team Edward" t-shirt yesterday cry. [ShowbizSpy]

• The mystery woman is apparently Erika Dutra, who was "was introduced to Robert by a mutual friend at the beginning of the night and he was smitten with her from that point on," according to a source, "He took pictures of her, sat with her all night, and the two of them were even seen kissing! There was serious chemistry between them, and they looked like they were having an amazing time." Related: sales of Erika Dutra voodoo dolls have shot up 999% in Hot Topic stores across the country. [Life&Style]
• "I just want to become a traditional old man with a beer belly. I'd like to be sitting on the veranda of our place in France, just staring out over the lawns." -Johnny Depp [ShowbizSpy]
• Charges will be dropped against Kiefer Sutherland as he has reached an agreement with the designer he headbutted at a Met Gala after-party earlier this month. [USWeekly]
• Blind Item: "Which once-hot pop star can barely sing a note and needs mucho enhancement in the studio, getting help from a songwriter who's also vocally stepped in for that working-class rock band? Similarly, which famous young lady actually does the singing for her more famous sister?" [BlindGossip]
• When Kate Moss goes camping, it's called "glamping." [DailyMail]
• "If I went to a psychiatrist, it would be a long session,' he says. 'I've always thought that I do have a number of issues that probably need dealing with, because I am quite odd in some ways. I get very dark moods for no reason. "- Simon Cowell [DailyMail]
• Wondering if your favorite television show got canceled? Here's a nice rundown of shows that didn't make it. [Yahoo]
• Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards, who went through a fairly nasty public divorce, have dined together since, for the sake of their children: "Believe it or not, we had dinner together with all of us," Richards says, "So I love that... It's important for our daughters to see us get along and to be able to be in the same room." [USWeekly]
• Hayden Panettiere was spotted frolicking on a yacht with James Blunt. When asked for comment, James Blunt pulled out a guitar and sang, "My life is brilliant, blah blah blah blah." Not really. But still. [DailyMail]
• "It's so important to have hobbies and girlfriends, and not know people that work in Hollywood. It's a sanity thing; it keeps you sane. I was playing soccer and I joined a kickball league. That's way more interesting to me than going to some party."-Jessica Biel [ShowbizSpy]
• "There'll be a whole new generation that has to be trained and a leader that you'll all love when you meet her. There'll be lots of cadets, boys and girls who'll be learning how to use the neuron splitter and the inter-planet interceptor - new tools to enable them to slip from dimension to dimension."- Dan Aykroyd on Ghostbusters 3. [Guardian]
• Employees at the hotel where Mariah Carey recently stayed during the Cannes Film Festival were ordered to decorate her room with Hello Kitty decor to "help her feel at home." [DailyMail]
• "I was told for a very long time that I was not pretty enough, too strange, not edgy enough. But I've always been famous, it is just that nobody knew."-Lady GaGa [ONTD]
• "There's always a sense of Andy Warhol whenever we make a Black Eyed Peas album. It's an artistic factory with several rooms going at the same time. We don't just sit down. We jump from room to room, all of us adding ideas to the recipe. If you get burned out on one idea or your ears get tired, you walk to another room and step into a whole fresh creative zone for more ideas."- Fergie [Reuters]
• Elizabeth Taylor has "fallen in love" with Twitter and is reportedly tweeting from her hospital bed. [NYTimes]
• In other Twitter news, Heidi Montag sent a tweet to Miley Cyrus that read: "Yeah we can't wait to go to church with you!! We need extra Jesus time before we leave for the Jungle for I'm a Celebrity."[EW]
• Mark-Paul Gosselaar is proud of his Saved By The Bell days: "That image will stay with me for my entire career," he says, "But I'm not looking to shed the persona of Zack. I'm proud of the work I did." Friends forever! With you everywhere! Talkin' bout friends forever! Always will be there, we'll be there! [JustJared]

• Samantha Ronson's family is seeking a restraining order against Lindsay Lohan, and confirming some of the troubling rumors about Lindsay's habits.

• Samantha's mom, Ann Dexter-Jones says Lindsay "was doing drugs" in her hotel room at Chateau Marmont this weekend. "She cuts herself too," Ann continued. "She is a cutter!" Sister Charlotte Ronson complained about Lindsay trying to get into her party and followed the family to the hotel and booked the room below them. "She does these things to get attention," said Charlotte. [OK]
• Sources say Lindsay is "devastated" about the restraining order. She has been crying uncontrollably and people close to her say they're worried she "might lash out." [TMZ]
• Lindsay tried to deal by doing what any young woman would do after a breakup: Going out clubbing with her mom. [Perez Hilton]
• Samantha Ronson went to Las Vegas alone for a DJ set last night. If you don't believe they are broken up, TMZ has provided riveting video of Sam walking alone. [TMZ]
• But, a source insists Ronson and Lohan "are totally communicating. [People]
• Looks like Jessica Simpson's record label wasn't too happy about her forgetting the lyrics to her songs - she's been dropped. [Perez Hilton]
• Jessica Simpson's rep confirms that she is no longer on country label Sony Nashville, but says she's still with Epic, the record company she released her pop albums with. "She was on loan to Sony Nashville for her country album," says her rep, adding that Jess "is and has always been an Epic artist. She continues to be on Epic's label."[People]
• When Rihanna's dad heard that Chris Brown pled guilty in court, he said "needs to stop being in denial" about what he did. "So what happened? Somebody else did this to Rihanna then?" said Ronald Fenty. "I just would like to see justice go in the right direction." [Us]
• Coldplay has filed court papers denying guitarist Joe Satriani's claim that they plagiarized one of his songs to create "Viva la Vida." They say Satriani's song "lacks originality" so it's not eligible for copyright protection and that any similarity is coincidental. [E!]
• Aspiring singer Leighton Meester has leaked a new song Heidi Montag-style. You can listen to Blair Bear's singing voice here: [Perez Hilton]
• As mentioned earlier, Nadya Suleman has a reality show in the works that will focus on her octuplets and "will also be following Nadya Suleman as she attempts to find a person to have a relationship with." There's still no word on what network will pick up the warped reality show. [Perez Hilton]
• Howard K. Stern and psychologist Khristine Eroshevich were supposed to be arraigned today in the Anna Nicole Smith drug case, but the court date has been postponed to May 13. [TMZ]
• People desperately want Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart to be together. If you are one of them, check out this intricate analysis of what time each left a hotel over the weekend. [E!]
• The Pet Shop Boys will release their 10th album, Yes in the U.S. on April 21. "We thought that 'Yes' just kind of summed up the theme of the album. It's a positive, upbeat, euphoric pop album," keyboardist Chris Lowe said. "It's almost an answer to the question, 'Is that the Pet Shop Boys?' 'Yes!'" [CNN]
• "I am often aware of how much harder it is for young women in Hollywood today ... I am so relieved and feel so privileged that I am beyond that." - Julia Roberts. [AFP]
• Charlie Sheen's baby, Max Sheen, has been released from the hospital. The twin was in the hospital for the past three weeks because of issues related to his low birth weight. "Premature babies are often underweight. Max made weight and went home," said Sheen's rep. [People]
• Following his arrest this weekend, Redmond O'Neal, the son of Ryan O'Nealand Farrah Fawcett, was charged with a felony count of drug possession today. [TMZ]
• Farrah Fawcett's doctor says she is expected to leave this hospital in a few days, and that she has been a particularly great patient. "All people who face cancer are brave," says Dr. Lawrence Piro, "but Farrah has been especially brave because she has had to battle two burdens at the same time. One is the burden of cancer. The other is the burden of going through the cancer in a very public way. Throughout, Farrah has used something which is a masterful gift of hers, and that's her humor. And positive thinking." [People]
• Nicholas Cage has sold his German castle. "Due to the difficult economic situation, unfortunately, I was no longer able to keep it," he said. [Yahoo]
• Diane Keaton will star opposite Harrison Ford in a movie about feuding morning news anchors. [Daily Variety]
• Four of the girls expelled from Oprah Winfrey's Leadership Academy for Girls in South Africa on sexual harassment charges say they were locked in their dorm rooms for days with guards outside before being expelled. One is talking to the tabloids and says, "If they say I was touching other learners, it's true ... No one complained to me about it. Obviously if you touch someone, if they are uncomfortable, they will tell you." [Perez Hilton]
• Drew Barrymore says she didn't lose weight while filming Grey Gardens intentionally. "I got really thin while I was making the movie because I was so fraught with anxiety," said Barrymore. "I couldn't eat for a while." [E!]
• Drew also says that she wants to focus more on dramatic roles now. "I'm in my thirties now, and I really want to try all the things that I haven't gotten to do yet, like directing, and doing a drama," said Drew. "I've produced and gotten to do a lot of optimistic love stories, and that was so where I was at for 10 years in my life. And now I feel like, 'Okay, now I know how to do that. I wanted to get scared again.'" [People]
• Gwyneth Paltrow and her trainer Tracy Anderson are having a hard time getting people to sign up for their $900-per-month gym, and now Anderson is holding two classes at a Marriott. [The Observer]
• Julianne Hough is leaving Dancing With The Stars next season. "I wasn't planning to come back this season because I wanted to focus on my music," Hough said. "But I went back and it's been so much fun to dance with my good friend who happens to be my boyfriend." [Fox News]
• Hugh Jackman Tweeted: "Having lunch on the harbor [sic] across from the Opera Center. Loving life!" But the landmark in his hometown of Sydney is actually the Opera House. [The Sydney Morning Herald]
• Sienna Miller is making her Broadway debut this fall in the play "After Miss Julie." She says: "I'm scared obviously but really excited ... If you want to be an actress you think about opening on Broadway." [Reuters]
• Kim Kardashian may be the butt of Eminem's jokes, but she says she doesn't mind. "I just saw Eminem's new video for "We Made You" and he totally spoofs me!!" Kardashian wrote on her blog. "It was a total surprise to me because I had no idea he was going to talk about me in the song ... I think this video is so funny! I am a huge Eminem fan and find it flattering that he would rap about me ... He's a bit harsh about some other celebrities, but you just have to let it go and have a sense of humor." [People]

• Madonna's adoption of a second Malawian child: Denied.

A spokesperson says the judge's decision had to do with "residency requirements" and the fact that the girl was being well taken care of in the orphanage. Will Her Madgesty appeal? She's actually wanted to adopt this child, Mercy, since she met her in 2006. [CNN, Telegraph, ABC News, People]

• Sacha Baron Cohen totally has a random black baby in Bruno, to mock Madonna, perhaps? [Daily Mail]
• While it is indeed good news that Britney's ex, Adnan Ghalib, has turned in his gun — for which he had a license — the question must be asked: Why did a paparazzo have a fucking gun? [E!]
• Two things about Jessica Simpson maybe being on Dancing With The Stars: She is an actual star, but we all know she can't dance. [MSNBC]
• Jennifer Lopez wants more kids but loves the attention of the spotlight and doesn't want to be a stay-at-home mom, says a random source. Dilemmas! [Gatecrasher]
• Amy Winehouse is back in St. Lucia, and who could blame her? [Mirror]
• Gymnast Shawn Johnson is trying to put the stalker stuff behind her and says, "I'm doing really good. Keeping my mind set on the dancing, that's the most important thing for me right now." [ET]
• Pencil this in if you must: Sex And The City 2 hits theaters may 28, 2010. [E!]
• If you want to see the show tunes that were on the iPod President Obama gave the Queen, click the link. "Shall We Dance" seems like an obvious choice, but it's kind of amusing to see a song from Rent on there. [CBS News]
• Oh lord, Barack Obama may have broken copyright laws by buying music and then giving it away. [Wired]
• Check out shots of Brad Pitt from Vanity Fair; he's in character as a Nazi-killer from Inglorious Basterds. [Socialite Life]
• The guy who tried to break into Jamie Foxx's hotel room — and who has been hanging around the set of Foxx's latest flick — has been arrested. It's crazy that Foxx had to force the guy out of his room and slam the door in his face! [E!]
• Johnny Depp is in Puerto Rico shooting a flick called The Rum Diary and looks adorbs. That is all. [Socialite Life]
• Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers will be part of an "all-star" recording that a source is calling "Disney's version of 'We Are the World.' It's about kindness and passing it on." If there is anything about purity rings or virginity I am suing God. [E!]
• You know Miley Cyrus' little sister Noah is an actor, right? She says: "I think it's amazing to have Miley as a sister because I look up to here and she's like my role model because she tells me everything to do that's right and I really learn everything from her." [The Star]
• Kelly Killoren Bensimon: No longer modeling for Saks Fifth Avenue. [Page Six]
• Five words: Hugh Jackman naked in Wolverine. [Socialite Life]
• Rising Sun Pictures, the Australian visual effects company that worked on Wolverine, swears it is not responsible for leaking the flick online. [The Star]
• James Franco is going to star in another stoner comedy called Your Highness. [Pop Sugar]
• LeAnn Rimes had dinner with an "unidentified male friend" and OMGISSHECHEATINGOMG. [Just Jared]
• Maybe you heard about this? Some show called ER had its finale last night, after fifteen seasons on the air. [E!]
• If you live in Boston, you won't see Jay Leno's 10pm show at 10pm — you'll see the news instead. [E!]
• The BBC has been fined for the lewd phone calls made by TV personality Jonathan Ross and comedian Russell Brand. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Charlie Sheen's infant son remains in the hospital. [People]
• Why in the name of Zeus can this woman not rest in peace? Anna Nicole Smith's dad is planning on suing her former lawyer/boyfriend/pill supplier, Howard K. Stern. [MSNBC]
• Pilot Chesley Sullenberger already has a two-book deal; now there's a TV documentary about the hero coming to TLC later this year. [NY Daily News]
• Chef Jamie Oliver has a brand new daughter, Petal Blossom Rainbow. She joins sisters Poppy Honey, 7; and Daisy Boo, 5. Brain explodes from cutesy twee names in 3…2 … [People]
• Got sunshine on a cloudy day? The Temptations will perform at the NCAA Final Four! [Yahoo News via AP]
• Woody Allen's latest flick is shot in New York — this after the last four were shot in Europe. Welcome back! [Yahoo News via Reuters]
• The Rolling Stones will reissue several albums, remastered, but with the original track listings and sleeves. [Mirror]
• First it was one station in Florida; now 16 TV stations are refusing to air the Osbournes' new show. [Daily Mail]
• Blind item! "Which wholesome TV host shocked partygoers when he pulled out a baggie of Colombia's finest?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I was driving once with my best friend - this was when I was in my 20s — I remember ripping my faux eyelashes off because they were driving me crazy, and sticking them under her dashboard. [A week later my friend called]. She said, 'Um, Brooke? I found your fake eyelashes stuck under my dashboard - why the hell did you put them there?' I was so embarrassed! But then she goes, 'And then I decided to put them on, so I'm wearing them today!' I was hysterical. How gross, right?" — Brooke Shields. [Gatecrasher]
• "With a black president, we've got to come up with a new excuse. Can't blame the Man, when you are the Man." — Wanda Sykes. [WSJ]

• Thanks to the tipsters who let us know that Chris Brown was hanging out at their school, the University of Mary Washington earlier this week, and that his visit was very poorly timed.

• Chris Brown was spotted playing basketball in the school's gym. What's really ironic/disturbing is that it happened to be in the middle of The White Ribbon Campaign, a week devoted to raising awareness about violence towards women. [TMZ]
• Rihanna snuck out of L.A. unnoticed and is now in Hawaii and getting back to work. [TMZ]
• Sam Lutfi's sister Christina testified in court today that she slipped Britney Spears a cell phone at her request because Jamie Spears won't let her use the phone. "[Britney] told me she wanted to get a hold of Sam," said Christina. "She wanted him to help her find a lawyer, and wanted someone to get a prepaid cell phone to her. She was scared because her father was blackmailing her with visitation rights over her kids." Brit's security confiscated the phone. [People]
• These court documents show that Britney Spears' attorney guaranteed that if Britney flakes out and can't finish the Circus tour, he'll pay $1.5 million to vendors. [TMZ]
• A man claiming to be Beyonce's manager tried to push his way into Jamie Foxx's hotel room on March 22. Foxx fended him off, but his security team spotted him today and he was arrested for burglary, criminal threats, stalking, false imprisonment and harassment. [Perez Hilton]
• Government officials in Malawi are backing Madonna's adoption of four-year-old Mercy James. "She is supporting over 25,000 orphans in this country and she has proved that she can take care of David. Very few rich and famous people can take time to fly all the way to Malawi to support our children. We support her adoption process," says Minister Patricia Kaliati. [The Daily Express]
• Ryan Seacrest interviewed Miley Cyrus about her 20-year-old boyfriend, Justin Gaston. He asked, "has your dad not said to you, he's a little too old?" "No," Miley said. He also asked, "Do you think you'll marry your Justin?" to which she said, "If he gets a pretty ring." [RyanSeacrest.com]
• Everyone thought Michael Vick would return to football once he got out of prison, but he has other ideas. He has a construction job lined up and will work a regular 40 hour week. [TMZ]
• There's a rumor that Lindsay Lohan is on a liquid diet and drinks three Red Bulls a day. Her rep says, "Lindsay has always enjoyed a Red Bull, but she eats. Everybody needs to mind their own business and stop worrying about what Lindsay eats or doesn't eat." [People]
• Dina Lohan tried to take her daughters Lindsay and Ali clubbing, but were turned away because Ali is only 15. Dina reported screamed, "Do you know who I am?" when they weren't let in. [Celeb News Wire]
• Lindsay Lohan had yet another nipple slip. [Egotastic]
• Shanna Moakler says she isn't breaking up with Travis Barker because she was having an affair with Gerard Butler, but because Barker was cheating on her. She says after his plane crash, "Not only did I fly to Georgia, I stayed by his side the entire stay and also for the bus ride home... After arriving in L.A. and getting settled in the new hospital, I came across numerous romantic emails with MANY other woman, some famous, some I personally knew - all heartbreaking." [Star]
• Maya Soetoro-Ng, Barack Obama's sister, has a book deal. The book is called Ladder to the Moon and is about what lesson's her four-year-old daughter might have learned from her mother, had she lived. [Politico]
• Last night Mickey Rourke carried an open beer out of a restaurant in Hollywood. [TMZ]
• Tommy Lee has a profile on a dating website for millionaire, but he says "d33pthr0at" is an impostor. In real life he's dating one of the contestants from Paris Hilton's My New BFF. [TMZ]
• Isla Fisher and Courteney Cox had tea together yesterday and brought their daughters along. [Pop Sugar]
• Mark your calendar and cancel all you appointments: the Sex and the City sequel will come out on May 28th 2010. [Perez Hilton]
• Charlie Sheen says one of his twins does not have a heart condition. His rep said: "Charlie and Brooke's infant son remains in the hospital, not because of a heart condition as reported, but because he has not gained the weight necessary to leave hospital. Max is expected to reach the weight requirement shortly and will join his brother [Bob] at home." [Star]
• But now Entertainment Tonight is insisting that the baby does have a heart condition, but is in the hospital because of his low birth weight. [Entertainment Tonight]
• Zooey Deschanel would like to point out that she's not Katy Perry. "It's a little bit annoying, to be totally blunt. The only similarity that we have is that we look a bit alike," said Deschanel. [Perez Hilton]
• Natasha Bedingfield wants you to know that her honeymoon is going well. She says that though you "don't need another half to make me whole...having an 'other half' definitely makes my life a 'whole' lot more fun." [People]
• David Foster, says Clay Aiken is a great father to his sister Jaymes' baby. He says their relationship works because, "she's very close with Clay, they're best friends ... It made perfect sense to me that he'd want to have a child with his best friend." [Entertainment Tonight]
• Jennifer Hudson says her fans don't have to feel responsible for her. She says: "The other day this lady came up to me and got really close to me," she recalls, "and I thought, 'What is it that makes people want to ... embrace me?' I don't like it when people get all emotional. I don't want you to cry." [People]

• A dude was arrested for trying to break into the Dancing With The Stars studio.

He's now got a restraining order against him because he was trying to meet Olympic gymnast Shawn Johnson — but with two guns and duct tape in his car. Frightening. [Breitbart]

• The man stalking Shawn Johnson, Robert O'Ryan, says the gymnast was "speaking to him personally through the television and via ESP, and he will be with her not matter what." [NY Daily News]
• "Desperate" Britney Spears has been sending texts to ex Adnan Ghalib, according to a source. "She keeps sneaking messages to Adnan begging him to help her win back her freedom. She says she is lonely and misses being able to date the men she chooses. She feels trapped." [The Sun]
• One of the nurses fired by mother of octuplets Nadya Suleman says: This woman does not care for these kids, she's in this for the media, for the paparazzi." [Breitbart]
• "This woman does not care for these kids, that's my honest opinion," says nurse Linda West Conforti, founder of Angels In Waiting. [ABC News]
• Yes, Nadya Suleman was once a stripper. Or topless dancer. Move along. [MSNBC]
• Scarlett Johansson is the "muse" of Champagne brand Moet & Chandon, and you are not. [WWD]
• Also, people are talking about how thin ScarJo is now. [Defamer]
• Are Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz on the rocks? A source says: "He is going out all the time and she's stuck at home. It's just not working." Her rep says this is not true. [Page Six]
• Mariah Carey wants a baby, so she has dropped $200K on a pink crib, a high chair and some other stuff. Her rep says it's not true. [Gatecrasher]
• "Jessica Simpson was spotted ordering a cooked gourmet meal in a restaurant for her dog." [The Star]
• Neil Patrick Harris will host the TVLand Awards, which sounds like fun: There will be tributes to Magnum PI, Knots Landing, M*A*S*H and, uh, Two And A Half Men. [Socialite Life]
• CSI star Marg Helgenberger has filed for divorce from her hussband, actor (and SAG prez) Alan Rosenberg. They married in 1989 and have a son. [Breitbart, AP]
• Bish Plz Face Of The Day goes to Harlow Madden, resplendent in purple. [People]
• The Oscars, which have taken place in February the last couple of years, are moving back to March. [NY Mag]
• What is wrong with this sentence: The Pussycat Dolls will perform on the Kids Choice Awards, singing "Jai Ho." [Three Stooges movie. Directed by the Farrelly brothers. Starring Jim Carrey, Benicio Del Toro, and Sean Motherfucking Penn. [World Of Wonder, E!]
• Nicole Kidman's been cast in that Woody Allen film which Freida Pinto, Naomi Watts, Josh Broling and Anthony Hopkins are already attached to. [Yahoo News via Reuters]
• Canadian model Noot Seear has been cast in sparkly vampire flick New Moon. This story suggests, "Let the Robert Pattinson and Noot romance rumors begin!" [Yahoo News via E!]
• Lost's Ian Somerhalder has joined the cast of a new CW show, Vampire Diaries. [Variety]
• By the by, the Twilight soundtrack is burning up the charts; Robert Pattinson sings on it, you know. [Yahoo News via E!]
• A review of ABC's new show, In The Motherhood, which is based on webisodes, reads: "What may be funny for five minutes isn't necessarily funny for 30." [USA Today]
• Ugly Betty fans: Do you think Betty should end up with her boss? Eric Mabius, who plays bossman Daniel Meade, says no: "That would be the equivalent of us jumping the shark." [USA Today, EW]
• Courteney Cox has been shooting her new show, Cougar Town, and it seems her wardrobe consists of bathrobes. [Daily Mail]
• Here's a preview of what to expect of the new 9 To 5 musical — starring Alison Janney! Dolly Parton oversaw the casting and wrote the music. [NY Post]
• Whee! Bob Barker is coming out of retirement — for one day — to be on The Price Is Right. He'll be promoting his autobiography, Priceless Memories. I want to spin the wheel. [ET]
• Jeremy Piven's sushi case will go into arbitration on June 8. [EW]
• Click the link to see Padma Lakshmi eat a burger like she's having sex with it in an ad for Carl's Jr. [E!]
• Watchmen actor Jeffrey Dean Morgan just found out he's the father of a four-year-old son by an old girlfriend. Surprise! [Daily Express]
• Gossip Girl's Kelly Rutherford is on the cover of Baby Couture, you know, the magazine that puts the coo in couture? [Just Jared]
• Who the hell cares if Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller were rooting against Denise Richards on Dancing With The Stars? [MSNBC]
• Here is a video of Pharrell Williams singing and dancing in a McDonald's in Paris because they wouldn't serve him; they weren't exactly open or something. [NY Daily News]
• Jenny McCarthy is on the cover of Shape magazine, and says "[Weight Watchers] taught me portion control and to be conscious of what I put into my mouth." That's what she said? Anyway, she's not gluten and dairy free, not that you wanted to know. [People]
• Merengue star Elvis Crespo is accused of masturbating on a flight from Houston to Miami. A woman says she saw him cover himself with a blanket, jerk off and then expose himself. Questioned at the airport, Crespo said: "I don't recall doing that." [AP]
• Brit headline of the day: "Simon Cowell Gets His Comeuppance As Prince Philip Calls Him A Sponger." [Daily Mail]
• Put this on your wish list: A box set of Hollywood movies shot before the 1934 Production Code. "Graphic stories of scandal, adultery, prostitution, drug use, murder and homosexuality." Woohoo! [USA Today]
• Blind item! "Which mouthy actor had a waitress dump a scalding cup of coffee in his lap - right after he smacked her bottom?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Interesting characters are pretty rare if you really want to be the lead. That's the usual complaint of actresses my age, and they're not wrong. They depend on you being beautiful. Since I'm not cast for my physicality, I'm not that interested in those parts. I find that playing so many characters in so many films is a way to stay in the moment." — from a profile on fantastic, awesome actress Catherine Keener, who turns 50 this week. [Guardian]
• "Complex later replaced the pic with the Photoshopped version, causing all of this drama. But you know what, who cares! I'm proud of my body and my curves and this picture coming out is probably helpful for everyone to see that just because I am on the cover of a magazine doesn't mean I'm perfect." — Kim Kardashian on her Photoshop of Horrors. [Socialite Life]
• "I always say the younger girls have the abundance of work, but I get to play real women, not girls, who have a whole life behind them." — Virginia Madsen, who's in The Haunting In Connecticut. [LA Times]
• "Right now, I like the idea that things can just kind of pop up and if they feel right I can do them. Committing to my own sort of project, that's like, 'Okay, let me block out two years of my life and do it.' I was heavily fulfilled with the last one and I always have this thing with myself that if I can't sleep because I need to do it, then I'm gonna do it. But if I'm not losing sleep over it then…" — Justin Timberlake, who is not working on a new album. [The Star]
• "It's not black-and-white justice. It's heart-and-soul justice. That's the difference between her and a lot of the crime shows out there. These crimes are not huge. But they are offensive. And they're disrespectful. Some of them, she has to go to the law. But some of them are small, like 'Somebody took my dog!' Or 'I think my husband is with another woman.' And she pours out justice the way she sees fit." — Jill Scott on her role in The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency, which debuts Sunday on HBO. [USA Today]

• Rihanna's maybe moving on! But: She was seen getting cozy with Wilmer Valderrama. Isn't that dude bad news bears? He's been linked to Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Ashlee Simpson, Mandy Moore… [Mirror]

• So you know how Lindsay Lohan has a new Maserati? It's already been in a minor car accident. LL wasn't driving — her assistant hit a Subaru in front of them. [Just Jared]
• Is Angelina Jolie on a "crazy" diet called liquid detox? [The Sun]
• WTF: Nadya Suleman has fired the nurse-nannies from Angels in Waiting! She felt she was being judged or something? How the heck is she going to take care of 14 kids by herself? Seriously? [E!]
• Did Jennifer Aniston dump John Mayer over his Twitter obsession? [Daily Mail]
• This one time, Mary-Kate Olsen was driven off the road by the paparazi. "It was never written about,"she says. [Just Jared]
• Designer Rachel Roy has filed for divorce from hip-hop mogul Damon Dash. He co-founded Rocawear but has since been struggling with debt and bad business deals; she has her own line of women's clothing. They have two kids. This should be interesting. [NY Daily News]
• Jesus Luz says he did not cheat on Madonna with some random woman in Brazil: "The press created this story." Welcome to fame! [The Sun]
• Uh-oh: "Madonna's fling with Jesus Luz and her rumored hookup with A-rod may foil adoption plans." An official from Malawi's Ministry of Child Welfare says: "Our official policy is that we do not encourage our children to be sent into broken homes." [NY Daily News]
• Um, this report claims that Jesus wants to adopt a kid with Madonna. Grain of salt. [ONTD]
• Angelina Jolie's mother owes $60,000 in back taxes, despite having passed away in 2007. How do you fix that? [TMZ]
• Diablo Cody and her homies all wear matching necklaces which read "Fuck My Face." Heart-warming! [NY Mag]
• Here is a photograph of Amy Winehouse climbing over a spiked fence and being compared to Sideshow Bob. [Daily Mail]
• Lindsay Lohan's former roommate and Tila Tequila's ex-girlfriend Courtenay Semel has checked into rehab. [Page Six]
• Someone blogging as Leighton Meester but decidedly not Leighton Meester likes poetry, goes to a shrink and complains about the paparazzi. [NY Observer]
• Nicole Richie channels Lady Gaga in her pix for BlackBook. [Just Jared]
• Cindy Crawford is naked in the April issue of Allure, with some strategically placed soap bubbles. [The Superficial]
• Jessica "Slimpson"'s body "has now fully returned to its former glory" so you can all relax. [The Sun]
• Geri Halliwell is on a "man-ban." [The Star]
• Another day, another story about Hugh Grant making out with two women at the same time. In public. [Page Six]
• Kim Kardashian couldn't pronounce "philanthropic" at a charity event, and people laughed at her. Tragic! [Gatecrasher]
• Is Fergie heading to Washington to play a private concert for Sasha and Malia Obama? Is this why she is brunette now? Will she teach them to spell duchess with a T? [Gatecrasher]
• Coldplay's Chris Martin met kiddie band The Wiggles, got super psyched and them covered their song, "Fruit Salad." So punk rock. [The Sun]
• Chris Martin can't get Michael Jackson tickets! [Mirror]
• Maybe Chris Martin should bid on this Michael Jackson stuff up for auction? A Swarovski crystal-encrusted white glove could go for a mere $15,000. [NY Daily News]
• Speaking of Michael Jackson, he's invited the stars of Harry Potter to be All-Access guests opening night of his sold-out UK shows. Naturally. [The Sun]
• Anne Hathaway will play Judy Garland in an upcoming film and theater productions of Get Happy: The Life Of Judy Garland. Question is: Will she sing or lip sync? [E!]
• People. For the last time. Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are not a couple in real life. Quit asking. Sheesh. [E!]
• But hey! Meet the New Moon wolf pack! Cute teenage Native American actors! [Socialite Life]
• Amanda Seyfried has pulled out of Zack Snyder's film Sucker Punch — described as Alice in Wonderland with machine guns — due to scheduling conflicts. Who should play Baby Doll, the girl in a mental institution in this big-budget action flick? [ONTD via Slashfilm via EW]
• "Syfy" is not a new kind of hip hop from the West coast but what the Sci-Fi Channel is calling itself now. It's also Polish slang for syphilis, so people aren't kidding when they say, "Sick name." [Jossip]
• Denise Richards went to see Charlie Sheen's new twins: "They're amazing." Isn't it nice when everyone gets along? [ET]
• Ooh, recession humor: Amanda Bynes has just signed to an ABC pilot called Canned, a show about a group of friends who are all fired on the same day. [ET]
• Kiefer Sutherland has signed on to play Jack Bauer for an eight season of 24. [Mirror]
• Anna Faris is on the new cover of Self magazine; cover also shills "1 minute abs." Huh? [Just Jared]
• Chelsea Handler's last night show has been extended through 2012. Bring back Russell Brand! [Reuters]
• Oh no: Problems with NBC's Parks & Recreation? Test audiences found it "unoriginal" and "too slow." [Deadline Hollywood]
• Kenny Rogers music helps stroke victims. [Wired]
• This article about Angela Lansbury contains the following sentence: "Ms. Lansbury, who describes herself as a homebody and a working actress, is described by pretty much everyone else as a 'living legend,' a phrase that makes her want to vomit 'a little,' she conceded." [WSJ]
• Blind item! "Which TV heartthrob had to wait until a young starlet's mom walked away before he could hit on her at a party?" [Gatecrasher]
• "This movie was never meant to be the end of Hannah Montana. The thing is, a lot of people put where the show's future lays in my hands — and it's not up to me. It's up to Disney and whether they want more episodes, and we hope that they do." — Miley Cyrus. [Yahoo via Billboard]
• "I had avoided getting married pretty good for, like, 23 years, and I ... secretly felt that men who were married admired me, like I was the last of the real gunslingers." — David Letterman. [People]

• Reports of LeAnn Rimes cheating on her husband, Dean Sheremet, just got juicier: Sheremet's family members called in to a radio show this morning to announce that he is gay. [Perez Hilton]

• Originally a spokesperson for the ski resort where Natasha Richardson was fatally injured said she was walking around and laughing after the fall and went to the hospital an hour later. Paramedics say they saw her sitting on a stretcher and were sent away. She was taken to the hospital three hours later. [TMZ]
• You can watch Lindsay Lohan's new Fornarina commercial here. For some reason it reminds us of Barbie and the Rockers. [Just Jared]
• Lindsay says of Britney Spears: "She's marketed as an entertainer, which is what she is. Not necessarily as, like, an artist. And I respect that about her, cause she doesn't want to pretend." [Jossip]
• Lindsay is having a hard time trying to rustle up work these days. "It's scary when you realise, 'Oh my God, I'm not working'. And have a house to pay for now," she says. Lindsay added: "I'm talking to (lots of people). One is Sean Penn - I spoke to him the other day. We're trying to get Seth Rogen for this project, but Seth won't call us back." [The Mirror]
• Lindsay may not have a job but she just bought a new Maserati. [Perez Hilton]
• A source claims that model Natasha Ellie is the woman who sent Chris Brown a text message the night of the assault, not his manager. Supposedly lyrics to Rihanna's song "Emergency Room" is about Rihanna discovering Chris was cheating on her with Natasha. [Hollywood Rag]
• Doug Reinhardt has asked Paris Hilton's father Rick for her hand in marriage and will presumably propose soon. The couple have been dating since last month. [Hollywood Rag]
• Fred Durst is still talking about his brief relationship with Britney Spears. He says: "I just guess at the time it was taboo for a guy like me to be associated with a gal like her." [People]
• Kelly Osbourne just left rehab a few weeks ago and says this is the first time she's been clean since she was a teenager. "I had my tonsils taken out [at age 13], and they gave me liquid Vicodin," said Osbourne. "I found, when I take this, people like me. I'm having fun, I'm not getting picked on. It became a confidence thing." [Just Jared]
• Vanessa Hudgens is "clearly the man in the relationship" because she pumped gas while Zac Efron sat in the car. [The Superficial]
• Ellen DeGeneres is going to be on the cover of O Magazine. Putting different people on the cover of a magazine? What's Oprah thinking? [Perez Hilton]
• In this video Ellen DeGeneres and Katy Perry sing "I Kissed A Girl." [Perez Hilton]
• Charlie Sheen can't tell his twins apart. "They're not identical, but at this stage, they're similar enough," says Charlie. He says he and his wife picked the names Max and Bob because they "are very short and simple - easy to spell and remember ... Bob is the same frontward and backward. I'm a fan of a short and simple name." [The Star]
• Gwyneth Paltrow says she's feeling "mother guilt" because she has to take her kids out of their London home for her Iron Man 2 shoot. She says: "I barely ever do films, I'm with them almost all the time. But in a way it makes the transition harder. I feel like if I worked all the time, then they would be used to it. But when I'm always there and always doing the school runs and I'm always around and then I just disappear for 14 hours a day to film, it's hard." [The Daily Express]
• It's pretty clear where Suze Orman wants the profits from George W. Bush's book to go. She said she wants to tell the former president: "You blew up every single financial vessel we had and if you think you aren't personally responsible, well, the blame starts at the top. There is no higher top than you, SIR! If I were you, I would feel so absolutely horrific that I would take every penny I had and distribute it to anybody and everybody to help them in whatever way I could. You owe the American people every penny of your fortune and your family's fortune." [Perez Hilton]
• Years ago, James Toback directed the film Black and White, in which Robert Downey, Jr. hits on Mike Tyson. Before the shoot, which took place soon after Downey got out of rehab, RDJ found out Toback hadn't told Tyson about the scene. Toback recalls: "Downey said, 'What if he gets angry? I said, 'I would assume he would.' He said, 'How far do you want me to take it?' I said, 'Take it until he responds in the extreme.' Downey responded, 'What if he kills me?' I said, 'Well, I haven't thought about that. I think it's unlikely-no better than a 5% chance.' But, at the rate you're going, you're going to end up dying in the parking lot of a motel in Culver City. So what would be better ... that or dying like this?"" [Black Book]

• Lindsay Lohan won't be in court today to respond to a warrant for her arrest, but her lawyer will be there. The attorney claims it's all a misunderstanding, to which we say: Sure, sure. [AP]

• Lindsay Lohan's dad is "concerned" for his daughter: "I've said it before and I'll say it again — she has to be careful of the people around her. I worry about any of those negative elements in her life." Is one of those negative elements you, sir? [Extra]
• Lindsay Lohan's warrant seems to be due to her missing or being late to one of her alcohol education classes, which she must take as part of her probation. LL blames the paparazzi for making it impossible to show up on time. [TMZ]
• Six women were injured and three people were arrested and charged with inciting a riot at the America's Next Top Model stampede on Saturday. [NY Post]
• Lily Allen has filed charges against photographers who allegedly rear-ended her car; this comes after she punched one of the dudes. [E!]
• Here are pictures of Mel Gibson "frolicking in the surf" in Costa Rica with a woman who is not his wife. [Daily Mail, RadarOnline]
• Jennifer Aniston is telling friends she dumped John Mayer after he "went cold" after the Oscars. Sound like he did the passive-aggressive breakup thing. [The Sun]
• Rihanna may star in a remake of the Whitney Houston/Kevin Costner flick The Bodyguard? Why, Hollywood, why? [Gatecrasher]
• This is interesting: The Rihanna/Chris Brown duet was just an old demo. "Nothing has been recorded by Chris and Rihanna since February," says an unnamed source. [NY Daily News]
• Twilight's Robert Pattinson was overheard telling a fellow Brit, "I can't get laid [in N.Y.C.]" Sparkly vampires are so last year. [Gatecrasher]
• Pattinson had to "do all this naked stuff" for a man-on-man sex scene for his new Dali movie. He admits: "In a lot of ways, I was kind of crossing lines of what I thought I was comfortable doing." [Mirror]
• Drew Barrymore and Justin Long were seen making out at a bar in Hollywood one night, and laughing and smiling while eating sushi the next. That is not a euphemism. They're back on! [Just Jared]
• The first of Nadya Suleman's octuplets could be home tomorrow. [People]
• Ryan Reynolds says it took months and months to prepare for his role in Wolverine: "When you think about it like that, it's vaguely depressing," he says. "But when you actually do it, it's worth it when you see on the screen that's me and it's not a stunt person, and I'm doing the whole thing." [LA Times]
• Gwyneth Paltrow's trainer, Tracy Anderson, is having trouble getting people to join her gym. Maybe because membership is $4,500 a month? [Perez]
• Tracy Anderson says of her pupils, "Madonna never slacks off. She's like a gym nerd. Gwyneth is cheekier than Madonna, that's for sure. Some days she'll be like, 'Do I have to do cardio?'" [Mirror]
• This report claims Madonna works out so hard and and gets regular glyco peels on her face because she wants to look like her daughter. Yeah, right. [Daily Express]
• Speaking of Madonna, her new man, Jesus Luz, is moving in. [Mirror]
• And! He is macrobiotic now, thanks to her Madgesty. [Daily Mail]
• Meanwhile, clashing schedules mean Gwyneth Paltrow and husband Chris Martin won't see each other for weeks. Alert the media! [Daily Mail]
• Is there a cash prize on Dancing With The Stars? Because Lil' Kim owes $1 million in state and federal taxes, ouch. [UPI]
• Check out this profile of Paul Rudd, in which he says: "I went through a phase where I thought it was really funny to make pratfalls in very crowded places. And I jumped out of a moving car once for a laugh. That was a mistake." [NY Times]
• The promoter behind Michael Jackson's upcoming concerts says "He's 50 but he's going to dance his ass off." Also: "If Mike gets too nervous to go on, I'll throw him over my shoulder and carry him on stage. He's light enough." [Telegraph]
• There's already a Michael Jackson ticket-scalping scandal. [WSJ]
• And! Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch is about to be sold. [Fox 411]
• "Rob Lowe has been carpeted by bosses for being too orange." [The Sun]
• Robin Thicke will be touring with Jennifer Hudson and says that the tour will be "cathartic" for her. "I think it's going to be the perfect thing for her to do, to get out there and get outside her head and feel the love she's been getting. She's a special lady." [Yahoo News via E!]
• Gossip Girl's Jessica Szohr dropped by the set just to say hi to her boyf, Ed Westwick. [Gatecrasher]
• Kristen Stewart's gushing about the new Twilight movie: "To see them cope without each other and to see this character Jacob, who is supposed to represent light and warmth and he pulls her out of a rut that's like seemingly impossible — it's really tragic. Like, I can't wait to see Taylor's [Lautner] face when I tell him, 'It's him, it's always been him,'" she says. [LA Times]
• Keira Knightley will not be in the next Pirates Of The Caribbean flick, saying: "It was a completely fantastic experience, and it was an amazingly large portion of my life, but I don't think I need to go there again. I think that it's done." So who will be the leading lady in the film? We need to know, since Russell Brand may be playing Johnny Depp's brother! [Mirror]
• This profile of Kat Von D has a quote from a 12-year-old fan, who says: "I like how she says her tattoos are everything she's been through." [WaPo]
• Whoa, Rhys Ifans looks totally different and dare we say hot in these pictures. When he was dating Sienna Miller he looked like a vagrant. [Daily Mail]
• Rumors about Liz Hurley's marriage continue to circle; today it's that she is "more like a boss than a wife." Wait, is that bad? [Daily Mail]
• Liz Hurley's mother-in-law denies the rumors that Liz and her husband have broken up: "This is just gossip. That's all I can say. I don't like commenting on family matters in public." [Telegraph]
• Charlie Sheen's wife had twins Saturday night; the first kids for her and Charlie's fourth and fifth. [Star]
• Heather Mills bought a seafood restaurant in Hove, East Sussex, and plants on making it vegan. [Daily Mail]
• MC Hammer is being sued for not delivering a book on fatherhood to his publisher. Please Hammer, don't hurt 'em. [Mirror]
• What's cooking with Gordon Ramsay? He has been taken to court over unpaid debts three times in a month. [Daily Mail]
• British reality star Jade Goody is "near death." Do you get the feeling the papers are circling like vultures? [NY Times]
• Aww, the movie industry nursing home is closing by the end of the year. [UPI]
• R.I.P. Ron Silver, whom you may have known as Bruno Gianelli on The West Wing. [NY Post]
• Blind item! "Which songbird's hard-up husband is having a hard time paying off her $500,000 engagement ring? He tried to stiff the jeweler and when finally threatened with a lawsuit, said he'd pay - on an installment plan." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which rehabbed starlet's wallet turned up in the Financial District, with her driver's license, black American Express card and several bags of blow?" [Gatecrasher]
• "Nine months ago at the conception I pulled all my best moves - I used new style. Apparently it's all about temperature so the windows were open. We'll see what happens." — Jamie Oliver, who is hoping his unborn child will be a boy. [The Sun]
• "I don't think there was one dinner that I ever cooked my kids that wasn't burnt because I was always on the phone, because teatime came when America was buzzing. When it was noon in New York, it would be 5pm at home in England, and the phone would be going nuts. You know, they go on about women juggling, well, my theory is that something always has to give, and, in my case, it was my kids." — Sharon Osbourne. [Daily Mail]
• "I find that word so unconstrained and unsophisticated. I don't know if you are referring to The Sun newspaper's Shagger Of The Year title, which I've been awarded three consecutive times now. It ranks among my finest achievements along with my British comedy awards and other accolades. I continue to live as a single man might but I certainly don't do anything as vulgar as shagging." — Russell Brand, on being called a champion shagger. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "Children are so cute and talkative when you get them out of bed, vulnerable blabbermouths, but when they get older they talk less. As the days fly past, it's only going to be a few more years that he likes me. Maybe he'll always love me, but he might not always want to be around me – he might not always like me. He's borderline embarrassed by me already, so…" — Sarah Jessica Parker, on spending time helping her son get dressed in the morning. [Daily Mail]
• "Finding someone that you like, or who likes you, is always difficult at my age. But being famous complicates things much more. I suppose that some boys feel a bit intimidated by me and stay on their guard." — Emma Watson, who is about to turn 19. [Telegraph]
• "My teeth are capped and I had the fat removed from under my chin. That's basically why I have the goatee because it covers the scar. And my nose was straightened. Then they took the heaviness out of my eyelids. Thank God the plastic surgeon said you've got to be careful, you've still got to look like you. But I've stopped dying my hair, that's it now. I never did it before because it would have been a salt-and-pepper look, which wasn't good. But the older I've got, the whiter my hair has got and I like it." — Tom Jones. [Mirror]
• "I never watch my [movies]. I make an album and then maybe 10 years later, I hear a thing or two. If I walk into somebody's house or a department store, I always say, 'Can you please turn that off?' Because I spend so much time on it, before it's released, that once it's released it's on its own. I really don't want to listen to it." — Barbra Streisand. (Yentl is now on DVD!) [Newsweek]
• "I want to very badly. But I want to get it right. We are definitely on band practice. There are a lot of performances in the movie." — Kristen Stewart, on singing while playing Joan Jett in new movie Runaways. [LA Times]
• "How this IVF rumor started, I really, really have no idea. But I can tell you that it is definitely not happening in the near future…It's great that Ellen and I are a gay couple and people are open-minded enough to talk about us having a family. The only thing I'm trying to avoid by denying it is, I just don't want those horrible pictures in magazines where they circle your stomach and point and go 'baby bump!' " — Portia de Rossi. [LA Times]
• "I went to a pitch meeting for a show last year and the guy in the office asked me why is it that people do drag? And I said why is it that more people don't do drag? What in our culture keeps us from dressing up and using all the colors in the creative box? The answer to that question is we grow up in a fear culture that says blacks go there, and Jews go there, and it's really interesting that we inflict these margins and parameters on our lives. I have to credit drag with helping me tear down a lot of those walls. Once you tear down one wall its like, you know what, we could have a really great room if we tore down all of these." — RuPaul. [The Daily Beast]
• "Bad behaviour makes men more glamorous. Women get destroyed, thrown out of society and locked up in institutions. My mother had me locked up in an insane asylum the first time I told her I was doing drugs. A really heavy place. Mick [Jagger] came and got me out." — Marianne Faithfull. [Telegraph]

• Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady were wed yesterday in Santa Monica. The bride wore Dolce & Gabbana, and so did her three dogs. [Us Magazine]

• A source claims that often, and especially towards the end of the marriage, Guy Ritchie would call Madonna "It." As in "It's in a bad mood today." And "We can't make It angry." This paper has a helpful illustration of Cousin Itt wearing a pointy bra. [The Sun]
• Blake is no longer incarcerated! Amy Winehouse's husband got out of jail yesterday and says of the divorce: "It's all going ahead - but I don't really know what will happen." And! "It's just nice to be on the outside again. Now I am going to get over my drug habit." Amy, who is still in St. Lucia, may return to London to try and "save her marriage." Really? [The Sun]
• Will Chris Brown go to jail? Will the charges ever be filed? Is his crime a misdemeanor or a felony? So many questions, not enough answers. [People]
• Robert Pattinson and Hugh Jackman went out and did karaoke together in Tokyo. Ten bucks says they sang nothing but show tunes. [E!]
• Daniel Radcliffe took a "mystery brunette" out on a date and the paps were there to make things even more awkward! [Daily Mail]
• Remember how Jeremy Piven abruptly quit Speed-The Plow? A grievance hearing took place yesterday, but no agreement was reached. Will producers take it to court? [AP]
• Piven says he dropped out of the play after being examined by a "Harvard-educated cardiologist affiliated with Yale." So there. [TMZ]
• Piven cried twice during the 20 minute hearing and said he'd been "incredibly sick." [NY Times]
• Producers failed to prove that Piven should not have dropped out of the play. [People]
• Initiation ceremonies require Princes William and Harry to drink through a straw from a toilet filled with beer and strip naked to run the length of the runway at the Royal Air Force base in Lincolnshire. This is how you "earn your drinking wings" or something. [The Sun]
• So you know the little girl who played Latika in Slumdog? Rubina Ali? Her parents had to be pulled apart after brawling with each other at her homecoming yesterday. A neighbor says: "They were hitting each other and tearing each other's clothes off." Apparently her mom walked out when Rubina was four, leaving her father to care for her, and her father called the mom a "money grabber." Countered the mother: "I'm not here for money, I just want to celebrate the success." [The Sun]
• Crap: Azharuddin Mohammed, the ten-year-old boy who played young Salim in Slumdog was beaten by his father yesterday. He was tired from his flight from L.A. and refused his father's request to leave their shack and face the media; his father started hitting him. There's a picture of the kid crying. [Daily Mail]
• Even though Jewel hurt her knees while rehearsing, producers are "desperate" to keep her on Dancing With The Stars. [MSNBC]
• Early word is that Lil' Kim is the one to beat on Dancing With The Stars. Can't wait to see her costumes! [People]
• Russell Simmons has agreed to pay $40,000 a month in child support to Kimora Lee Simmons. She has sole custody of their 2 daughters. And now: Gobs of cash. [AP]
• Loving, loving Beyoncé's hair on the April 2009 cover of Ebony! [The Life Files]
• LOL: please just look at the expression on his face in these high school yearbook pictures of Will Ferrell! [TMZ]
• Jodie Foster was caught speeding, and it was caught on tape, but the footage won't be shown. Apparently she got "annoyed," "angry" and "agitated" with the cops. [Page Six]
• Critics are praising U2's new album even as they critique Bono. Writes Washington Post's J. Freedom du Lac: "It's becoming increasingly difficult to hear U2's music without filtering it through your feelings about the other Bono, that strident, sanctimonious swirl of idealism, agenda and ego." [Reuters]
• If you're interested in the 1996 audition that changed Edward Norton's life, click the link at the end of this sentence. [ET]
• This is interesting: A film version of the musical Damn Yankees will star Jim Carrey and Jake Gyllenhaal. Who will play Lola? You know that whatever Lola wants, Lola gets. [Variety]
• Not sure why this behind the scenes video of Mischa Barton at a photoshoot is so dull, maybe because she has the same blank expression in every scene. [BlackBook]
• No idea what Woody Allen's new flick is about, but the cast is intriguing: Antonio Banderas, Freida Pinto, Naomi Watts, Josh Brolin and Anthony Hopkins. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Pink. Dolly Parton. Rocking chairs. For sale! [USA Today]
• The conflict between Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards has died down. So says Charlie's younger brother Ramon Estevez, whom I did not know existed. [E!]
• George Lucas will produce his first film, post-Star Wars. It's based on the famed Tuskegee Airmen. [Fox 411]
• The Coen brothers have a new film, and it's a short, fake commercial slamming the coal industry. [Guardian]
• MC Hammer's new TV show, Hammertime, will give viewers a glimpse of his life as "as a businessman, computer geek, proud father and husband." No word on whether he is too legit to quit. [AP]
• Jermaine Jackson is working on getting custody of his sons after one told a teacher that his mother had been slapping him repeatedly across the face. [RadarOnline]
• This didn't get a lot of press, but people in wheelchairs protested the Academy giving Jerry Lewis a humanitarian award at the Oscars because they object to the way he talks about "the cripples." Producers actually tried to make sure the foreign press wouldn't write about the incident. [Deadline Hollywood]
• Ann and Nancy Wilson of Heart will get a lifetime achievement award from songwriter's group ASCAP. [Reuters]
• Paul Newman was given a posthumous honour by the US Congress on Tuedsay. [Reuters]
• Be honest: How do we feel about the fact that Eddie Murphy will play Richard Pryor in a biopic? [Guardian]
• Blind item! "Which angry comic had a few cast and crew members fired from his hit show - all because they overshadowed him?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I think that what I'm getting to explore is really the heart of a woman. And I can't say that about everything that I've done. Or maybe I've explored the heart of a woman, but it's been like skating on ice. You know, often you don't get to swim in it. It's an in-depth exploration, and kind of a close-up look at a woman, at all the different ways that she… I think in a way it's about love. You know? It's about love… all the different ways that she loves and whether those loves are acceptable or not." — Holly Hunter, on Saving Grace. [The Daily Beast]
• "I know that Ben Stiller for example, he watches American Idol and he'll email me: 'Hey, who got kicked off?' you know, the night it's on. I'm like, dude — I can't tell you, sorry, you're gonna have to watch. Coming up tonight on prime time!" — Ryan Seacrest, on Idol's celeb fans. [Mirror]
• "It's particularly distressing to me to observe that we're fine with these young women, who it normally is, who are chased, stalked, put under siege by battalions of strange men who sleep in their car and follow them and take pictures up their skirts, and when they throw the dummy out or whatever, everyone thinks they've gone mad. I would defy anyone not to be affected by what is, I think, harassment really. I just think it's slightly below a moral code that I have as a man or as a human being. To chase people, it just seems very bestial." — Rupert Friend, aka Keira Knightley's hottie boyfriend, who is in two films of his own this spring. [Independent]
• "I did not kiss her. She kissed me. We had fun." — Teri Hatcher, on her on-screen smooch with Eva Longoria Parker for Desperate Housewives. [Mirror]
• "At times I was incapable of getting enough oxygen to get my lines out on stage, and sometimes I'd forget where I was in the play. This misconception that I was out partying was wrong. My problem was that as soon as I woke up, I wanted to figure out a way to get back into bed." — Jeremy Piven. [NY Times]
• "Ty said he thinks his best chance of beating me is if I get pregnant during the show so I would be too tired to dance. Talk about a strategy! Of course, that would be fine with me if it did happen, so either way would be a win!" — Jewel, on competing against her husband, Ty Murray on Dancng With The Stars. [People]
• "We pay millions and millions of dollars in tax. The thing that stung us [about the criticism] was the accusation of hypocrisy for my work as an activist. I can understand how people outside the country wouldn't understand how Ireland got to its prosperity but everybody in Ireland knows that there are some very clever people in the Government and in the Revenue who created a financial architecture that prospered the entire nation – it was a way of attracting people to this country who wouldn't normally do business here. And the financial services brought billions of dollars every year directly to the exchequer. What's actually hypocritical is the idea that then you couldn't use a financial services centre in Holland. The real question people need to ask about Ireland's tax policy is: ‘Was the nation a net gain benefactor?' And of course it was – hugely so." — Bono, on the criticism of U2 moving part of its business to the Netherlands to lessen its tax burden. [Irish Times]
• "If you get knocked down, setbacks in life, like applying for a job if they don't hire you, keep trying, keep getting up, keep doing it. Don't give up, that's what it's about. I'm so tough and so bad, I can be humble and lift another guy up." — Mr. T, giving advice to the unemployed. [Mirror]
• "'Brown Eyed Girl' I didn't perform for a long time because for me it was like a throwaway song. I've got about 300 other songs I think are better than that." — from 10 questions with Van Morrison. [Time]
• "Hmm, [how to add] a sexy sizzle to your look? Well high heels are probably the easiest thing, I would say. Instant glamour. Walking around in them naked, you don't need anything else really." — Dita Von Teese. [Daily Express]
• "I hope it won't change anything in how other directors and actors work with me. I mean, the Oscar's going in the loo, next to Sam's. I'm not taking it on a set. I'm just going to work the way I've always worked, which is just to get on with it." — Kate Winslet on her Academy Award. [Daily Mail]

• So much Oscar gossip! For instance:

Amanda Seyfried got her heel caught in a stocking during the song and dance number. Zac Efron's microphone got tangled in his bow tie. We'll never be invited back," Zac joked. Alicia Keys broke a heel; Goldie Hawn snuck in the back where "no one's screaming." Jennifer Aniston was heard whispering to John Mayer: "I really love you, every part of you." [AP]

• On the red carpet, Mickey Rourke told a reporter: "I said to myself, 'I would rather have Loki for another two years than have an Oscar,' and I told her that, you know. But she stayed as long as she could." [E!]
• Mickey Rourke maybe tried to grope Jessica Alba, who "jumped back and made a disgusted face." [Gatecrasher]
• On the red carpet, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt snubbed Ryan Seacrest. Again. [NY Daily News]
• Kate Winslet on the red carpet: "I said to my daughter, 'If I did win the big prize, what do you think I should say?' And she said, 'I just think you should be really crazy and emotional'. I thought, 'You're no good.'" [E!]
• Kate Winslet doesn't want to see Angelina Jolie naked. [E!]
• Robert Pattinson on the red carpet: "I did a rehearsal and messed it up. I am probably going to be the letdown of the entire show." Uh, yeah. You're the let down of the entire show. The Oscars hinge on a sparkly vampire. [E!]
• Did you know that Oscar winners are obliged to sign winners' agreements? The agreements say if they or their heirs ever decide to part ways with their Oscars, they must offer to sell the awards back to the Academy for $1 each. Matilda Ledger will have to sign this when she turns 18, apparently. [E!]
• A review of the show: "Hugh Jackman a winner but production was a lost cause." [NY Daily News]
• Harvey Weinstein had a party Saturday night and everyone was there: Robert DeNiro, Leonardo DiCaprio, Jennifer Lopez, Jessica Alba, and Miss Lindsay Lohan, who showed up with a guy who owns local luxury car dealerships. [Fox 411]
• Katie "Jordan" Price attended Elton John's Oscar party, and her "rival," Victoria Beckham, was there. No showcase showdown occurred. [Daily Mail]
• An insider on Rachel Zoe: "Her television career is interfering with her styling work. Clients are getting very upset." This is why she was seen "flipping out over the phone and screaming at the top of her lungs" at the Weinstein pre-Oscar party. [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which married Oscar nominee has been cheating on his wife with a hard-partying starlet?" [Gatecrasher]
• Jennifer Aniston didn't run into Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at the Dreamworks Oscar bash — because they didn't show up! [Gatecrasher]
• Penelope Cruz and Tom Cruise did run into each other at an Oscar party. "Penelope tapped him on the shoulder and timidly asked, 'Tom?' Tom turned around, got visibly flustered and awkwardly said, 'Oh, hey. Hi,' and gave her a small, distant hug before turning back around to his friends. It was weird." [Perez]
• Here's a rundown of all the Oscar winners. [NY Post]
• Meanwhile, Chris Brown called Rihanna to wish her a happy birthday. He also sent her a diamond bracelet and necklace, as well as an iPod Touch. Friday night, Rihanna had a birthday party that was Blackjack-themed (Chris was not there) and then jetted off to Barbados. [Gatecrasher]
• What the fuck is up with CNN anchor Kiran Chetry saying that Rihanna will have to deal with the "stigma" of being an abuse victim? Writes Barbara Morrill: "Do we use such terminology about victims in a robbery? When a man beats up another man?" Some dude says, "She'll be remembered for this, rather than her own talents." This is not right. [Daily Kos]
• Amy Winehouse stays busy: Now she's accused of splitting up a lesbian couple. An unnamed woman claims she found her girlfriend in bed with Amy Winehouse, and that Amy asked if she wanted to join. This woman changed her MySpace profile to read: "Amy Winehouse asked me for a threesome and I said no, no, no." [Mirror]
• George Clooney is in Darfur, but the United Nations is pulling his security escort, since he has been speaking out on the troubles in the area. Please Cloons, be careful! [Daily Express]
• Nicholas Kristof says he and George Clooney are bunking in a tiny room in a guest house and "George's side of the room has a big splotch of something that sure looks like blood." [NY Times]
• Speaking of putting yourself in harm's way, T-Pain has canceled a concert in Guyana after "credible death and kidnapping threats." Someone doesn't like Auto-Tune! [E!]
• Oooh, will Michelle Obama be on the first non-Oprah cover of O magazine? [Liz Smith]
• Harlow Madden will be a big sister! Nicole Richie is pregnant again. [ONTD]
• Guy Ritchie might be dating a film producer on his Sherlock Holmes film, or just, you know, hanging out with a coworker. [Daily Mail]
• Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony threw a birthday party for their 1-year-old twins on Saturday in the backyard at their home in Bel Air. A clown was involved. [People]
• Cruz Beckham's birthday looks awesome: He turned four, while dressed as Wolverine, at the Xtreme Martial Arts World Headquarters in Hollywood. Eva Longoria and nieces attended! [Daily Mail]
• During his speech at the Independent Spirit Awards, Mickey Rourke said Eric Roberts "is the fucking man and he deserves another chance." No one seems sure why he felt the need to make this point. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Prince Harry and Natalie Imbruglia: Flirting via text message? [Daily Mail]
• Meanwhile, in a new documentary, a journalist says of Prince William: "He's doing almost nothing. I'm sorry, but as second in line of succession to the throne, he really should be doing more." [Telegraph]
• In this video, Rosario Dawson talks about her mother licking her in public. Yeah. She's traumatized by spit. There's more, about lesbians/sex/virginity. [NY Times]
• Slade Smiley, from Real Housewives Of Orange County, has been arrested. It's a civil contempt charge. [UPI]
• Al Pacino will play Salvador Dali in a new film; but not the same one in which Antonio Banderas will play Dali or the one in which Robert Pattinson plays Dali. Who will be more surreal? [Daily Express]
• Freida Pinto's ex is still talking about how Slumdog Millionaire wrecked their relationship, and how upset he is that Freida is getting close to Dev Patel: "Now everywhere I go I see them on billboards. I am devastated." This is from the paper that loves to shame women, don't forget. [Daily Mail]
• By the by, Salman Rushdie hated Slumdog, saying it "piles impossibility on impossibility." [AP]
• Bruce Springsteen will headline this summer's Glastonbury festival, bringing "Born In The USA" to the UK. [Telegraph]
• Is Michael Jackson making a comeback? He's reportedly in talks to do 30 live shows in London or Las Vegas later this year. Then again, a couple of weeks ago, he was reportedly dying. [NY Daily News]
• In this Q&A, Matt Groening talks about changing the main titles of The Simpsons: "We're always throwing in what we call Black Bart gags, where Bart is writing on the blackboard, and we switch little things around. Lisa's saxophone solo switches." [NY Post]
• Richard Gere and his wife have opened up an inn. They are innkeepers now. Do with this what you will. [NY Mag]
• The creative director and global business strategist of INXS, Chris Murphy, swears they did not dump their lead singer JD Fortune from the band in the middle of a busy airport. [News.com.au]
• Debbie Gibson's house in the Hollywood Hills is for sale and photos reveal that there is a mirrored piano in the living room and a 7-up can by the bathroom sink. [The Real Estalker]
• Charlie Sheen and wife Brooke had a sports-themed baby shower, if you care. [People]
• "I've been through a lot. I can't sleep, sometimes I wake up at night. I still see him." — Housekeeper Teresa Solomon, who found Heath Ledger dead more than a year ago. [News.com.au]
• "My intention is to be Prime Minister of Canada, not Governor General, which is mainly a ceremonial position." — William Shatner. [PR-Inside]
• "Some beautiful women are passive in the bedroom. They're gorgeous, they know they're gorgeous and they don't feel the need to do anything beyond being gorgeous. Elizabeth Taylor was not one of those women. Being with her was like sticking an eggbeater in your brain." — from an essay by Robert Wagner. [Daily Mail]
• "There's a lot of gay people that dress better than me… No, I just think it's a stereotype that all gay people dress good, and then it's also a stereotype that if you dress good, you're gay." — Kanye West. [NY Mag]
• "I think about it; because I am effeminate I've always thought about it, 'Am I gay?' And then, I so love being with women, and I so love women's bodies and all that. I think, well no, I can't be. But sometimes I think it would just be simpler if I was, because everyone thinks I am. I'm quite camp, but no, I don't think I am. If I was gay, I would just get on with it. But definitely I love women, I love being around women, I find them incredible and intoxicating, and I've never had that feeling I get with women with a man." — David Walliams of Little Britain. [Guardian]
• "From the first day I met her, she said, 'I want us to be friends and I want you to know that you are a huge part of our family and are welcome any time.' She has been as good as her word. Dad and I have had our ups and downs over the years but Catherine is someone who has cemented the family together. She and Dad were in Los Angeles two weeks ago because he got some sort of lifetime achievement award and we all went out to dinner. I've never seen my father as happy as he is with her. It's cool to see." — Cameron Douglas on Catherine Zeta-Jones being good for his dad, Michael Douglas. [Daily Mail]
• "It's always great to rehearse on a plane, because people think you're mad… Emotionality is really easy for me. My father always said that Fondas can cry at a good steak. And so on a personal and professional level it's great for me not to have to do that." — Jane Fonda , 71 (?!?) on her role in Broadway show 33 Variations. (The show is being protested by Vietnam vets.) [NY Times, UPI]
• "I have decided to freeze myself when I die. You know, cryonics. You pay a lot of money and you get stuck in a deep freeze once you've been declared dead. Medical science is bound to work out a way of bringing us back to life in the next century or so, and I want to be available when they do. I would be doing the nation an invaluable service." — Simon Cowell. [Daily Mail]
• "[Partying] is what I do for a living. I get paid to go to events and parties, and it's fun." — Paris Hilton. [Gatecrasher]

• Amy Winehouse is househunting in St. Lucia!

She will be a Caribbean Queen. A source says: "Amy loves it over there and being away from it all has helped her hugely in her fight against drugs. She has been drinking and smoking cannabis but is still a million times better than she was in Camden." [The Sun]

• Brad Pitt took the boys — Maddox and Pax — to Las Vegas! They were spotted at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino last night. Meanwhile, Angelina and the girls (Shiloh and Zahara) are in New York. Donde esta los twins?? [People]
• Liev Schreiber might star opposite Angelina Jolie in the spy thriller Salt. Sounds like a good combo, no? [Variety]
• Rihanna is "torn" about helping the police charge Chris Brown with assault. [NY Daily News]
• Madonna may not be in the Twilight sequel after all. Sadness! She would make a very convincing bloodsucker. [ONTD via EW]
• The "intimate" details of Madonna and Guy Ritchie's divorce will be made public? Haven't we already heard everything? [Daily Mail]
• Studios are "lining up" to court Tom Cruise? Because Valkyrie did better than expected around the world, and because he promotes his flix so hard? [Variety]
• When Nadya Suleman, mother of octuplets, was on the cover of Life & Style, sales went "through the roof." Us is expected to have a good week, too, since it has exclusive photos of Suleman. The question is: Who is getting the money from the sale of these exclusive pix? [MSNBC Scoop]
• Kanye West's hair is evolving. "His ducktail seems to be growing nicely into the mullet-nub stage. Bravo." [NY Mag]
• Did you know that Kate Winslet was the fourth choice for her role in The Reader? It was first offered to Nicole Kidman, then Marion Cotillard was considered, then Naomi Watts. [Daily Mail]
• When Dita Von Teese said she went celibate for awhile after breaking up with Marilyn Manson, she was only joking. "I just thought it was funny to say at the time," she says. "I'm pretty sure it's safe for you to report that I've had sex by now." But there's no one dude in her life: "I'm just really enjoying being single, and having fun, global affairs. I'm enjoying being free, and enjoying different men...I'm enjoying being in the moment and enjoying everyone for what they have to offer." [E!]
• Dita is working on a second book: "It's a step-by-step guide to beauty for girls who don't want to look like every other girl." [E!]
• LOL at "Orlando Zoom." [The Sun]
• At the Brit awards, Bono joked that he wanted to be in Girls Aloud. Bass player Adam Clayton quipped, "Which one?" [The Sun]
• Duffy won three Brit awards and joked, "I don't mean to be greedy." [Daily Mail]
• Coldplay won zero, repeat, zero Brit awards. [Mirror]
• Amy Poehler's new show, Parks and Recreation, started filming today. Amy says: "I'm excited about settling in and doing a really specific character, respectfully written, and I think it's really funny and really small and low-stakes. And I enjoy small, specific, low-stakes humor." [E!]
• A drunk Josh Hartnett knocked over a bunch of glasses of Champagne at a Fashion Week after party and explained, "Sorry, I'm half-lit." [Perez]
• Mickey Rourke's agent, David Unger, says financiers preferred Nicolas Cage for the role in The Wrestler. But Unger explains how he helped Rourke make a comeback. And! When Unger's parents' dog died, he says, Rourke got them another. "He did it without telling me; my mother had tears in her eyes," he says. "Of course, they named the dog Mickey." [USA Today]
• Tupac is dead, but his legal battles live on: A production company is suing the company run by his mother, alleging they're "refus(ing) to honor and perform a contract of a production of the film based on the life of Tupac Shakur." Dear Mama: Keep ya head up! [Hollywood Reporter]
• Anna Wintour wants Katy Perry and Justin Timberlake in Vogue. Whatever Anna wants — Anna gets! [Page Six]
• Recessionista alert: Real Housewife Bethenny Frankel used a coupon when getting her hair done. [Page Six]
• Everything you need to know about Conan O'Brien's last shows is here. [NY Daily News]
• Eric Bana is working on a film called Love The Beast, about his obsession with cars and racing. But he's teamed up with an environmental group to offset the pollution caused during filming: "We love cars but love the planet more," a producer explains. [Reuters]
• Arnold Schwarzenegger was supposed to shoot a scene for a Sylvester Stallone flick, but he has a pesky budget crisis to deal with. [TMZ]
• American Idol runner-up Katharine McPhee will make her TV acting debut in an April episode of CSI: NY. [Reuters]
• Sandra Bullock will star in a flick called The Blindside, in which a homeless black teen from a broken home is taken in by a well-to-d- family abd becomes one of the first players selected at the NFL draft. (It's based on a true story.) Bullock plays the rich mom. [Hollywood Reporter]
• E! host Debbie Matenopoulos is seeking $12,558 in temporary monthly support from her estranged husband. That's still a lot of money in this economy, right? [People]
• On that new show Confessions Of A Teen Idol, Eric Nies of The Real World and The Grind says he was almost going to be Batman instead of Val Kilmer. Stop laughing! [Videogum]
• Charlie Sheen's pregnant wife was hospitalized for premature contractions but she is already out. [E!]
• Charlie Sheen blabs about the nursery he and wife Brooke have set up for their twin boys, due in April. Yawn. [People]
• Slumdog Millionaire's Anil Kapoor says he identifies with the movie: "I also started from a very simple background. Bare feet. Running in the slums with my friends. Going through the rubbish." He grew up in "what they call a 'chawl,' a step up [from] a slum. You have these small cubicles, 100 or 200 sq ft, like holes, but they are made of concrete, and the ceilings are slightly different. For all of us there was a communal bathroom, so you have to stand in line. It's like two baths for about 10 families and two toilets for about 10, 15 families." [Guardian]
• What the world needs now: Little Fockers, the next flick coming down the line from the people who brought you Meet The Parents and Meet The Fockers. Ben Stiller will return; Robert De Niro and Owen Wilson are in negotiations. [Reuters]
• Calm down: The Rock is not returning to wrestling. He is, however, pushing his new flick, Race To Witch Mountain. Yay? [IHT]
• "I don't want to be known as just a pretty face. I loved Charlize Theron in Monster. I want to play parts that are challenging and inspiring." — Slumdog Millionaire's Freida Pinto. [Telegraph]
• "I thought, well maybe I'd like to get involved, but I was nervous about it and I thought, you know, I don't want to be a dilettante. People would say this guy's just an airhead celebrity and he doesn't know anything, and at the time of course, I didn't. So I thought: well I should learn about this and I travelled there." — Ben Affleck, on getting involved with humanitarian work in the Democratic Republic of Congo. [Mirror]
• "I can tell you that the guys have some standouts. That kid Danny Gokey is one of my favorites. Adam Lambert is pretty darn amazing. So are the guys who play the dueling pianos (Matt Giraud and Ricky Braddy). And Scott (MacIntyre) the blind kid, is fantastic. I love Megan (Corkrey). Oh, and Jackie Tohn - she's great." — Paula Abdul, on her American Idol faves. [MSNBC]
• "The difference now is for new bands. They are under so much pressure to release their material for free. It's different for us, we have a loyal fan base who buy our records. We can also make money from touring, thanks again to our fans, who go out and buy tickets. The danger in giving music away free is for writers. Where would Cole Porter be now? If you have to give away your work for free and you can't play live, where do you earn the money? It's an interesting time for music." — Bono. [The Sun]
• "I'm always looking for a man. But please, only princes should talk to me." — Nicollette Sheridan don't want no frogs. [People]
• "I think I won't [get naked in a movie] again. I can't keep getting away with it, and I don't want to become 'that actress who always gets her kit off.'" — Kate Winslet. [Page Six]
• "I hope Rhianna is getting counseling from a professional counselor who will tell her that there is no way for her to ever win, and that she will have to curtail her own penchant for escalating conflict by screaming at or hitting or humiliating her abuser. I hope he gets real counseling too, that is not from a minister or his mom or any other shame based bullshit method that will never work, and that is designed to avoid dealing directly with self-control issues. I hope that they both leave each other alone and get over their faults." — from a longish rant by Roseanne Barr. [DListed, MSNBC]
• "I can't pass judgment, but aren't fake breasts already looking really 1995?" — Jeanne Tripplehorn to More. [Page Six]

• Has the fighting between Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony has turned physical? Yes, according to Star.

An insider says "They love hard; they fight hard — and sometimes that has led to pushing and shoving." More in Midweek Madness. [Star]

• For the first time since her mother, brother and nephew were murdered, Jennifer Hudson will return to the spotlight: She'll sing the national anthem at the Super Bowl on February 1st. [E!]
• Mickey Rourke on 9/11: "President Bush was in the wrong place at the wrong time, I don't know how anyone could have handled this situation. I don't give a shit who's in office, Bush or whoever, there is no simple solution to this problem... I'm not one of those who blames Bush for everything. This shit between Christians and Muslims goes back to the Crusades, doesn't it. It's too easy to blame everything on one guy. These are unpredictable, dangerous times, and I don't think that anyone really knows quite what to do." [Telegraph via GQ]
• While shooting Revolutionary Road, Kate Winslet would bug hubby Sam Mendes about the film after work, during dinner. [Daily Express]
• Guess who hid in a bathroom and then got kicked out of a Golden Globes party for slipping in uninvited? Ms. Paris Hilton. How times have changed. [Gatecrasher]
• Some of you may find Josh Duhamel and Fergie's wedding invite — which came with a caricature of the couple fishing — cute, but it seems very cheesy and Six Flags souvenir booth. It's supposedly a "reflection of both of their personalities." The invite lady explains: "Fergie loves bling and has a love for unicorns and Josh loves nature. The artwork had leaves and hidden details like a unicorn and the invites were decorated with crystals." Go ahead, click and giggle. [People]
• Jared Leto spent Golden Globes night hitting on newly married ex-girlfriend Scarlett Johansson. [OK!]
• Are Kate Winslet's Oscar hopes in jeopardy due to Holocaust backlash over her Nazi role in The Reader? [Telegraph]
• Britney news! She has new digs. "I just took my babies to our new home and they loved it! I can't wait to move in," she wrote on her website. (Or was it a Harvard grad?) Anyway, her Studio City mansion is up for sale, if you have $7 million. [People]
• Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts think that Nicole Kidman's daughter, Sunday, is after their first-born son, Alexander. "I think it's kind of weird and early, and I think she should back off, slow down and get her act together before that all happens," Liev says. He also says his son is "dishy." "I can say that about my son? The boy is really, really dishy." [News.com.au]
• Not So Blind Item: "Yes, that douchebag is leaving the TV show. But, wanna know the real reason? He's back on the drugs and alcohol, showing up late to work and being very unpleasant to work with. Is his homewrecking girlfriend gonna support him now???" [Perez]
• Talk about girl-on-girl crime: Heiress Casey Johnson got in a fight with her ex-girlfriend, Courtenay Semel (who was Lindsay Lohan's "roommate" and dated Tila Tequila) and Semel "beat the crap out of her and lit her hair on fire." Casey had to go to the hospital. [Page Six]
• Cue teen screams: Vanessa Hudgens might be in the next Twilight movie. [NY Daily News]
• Roman Polanski has no plans to ever return to the United States, according to a new filing, and his lawyer argues that Polanski does not need to be present for the court to rule on his motion to dismiss a three-decade-old rape charge. [AP]
• Amy Winehouse has been offered a movie role! She would play a music teacher in a "problem school," kind of like Michelle Pfeiffer's flick, Dangerous Minds. But Amy would have to "clean up her act." Do we think she can do it? [The Sun]
• Paula Abdul has changed her tune and is now saying of American Idol: "I am a big fan of the show. I am blessed to be on the show. It's the greatest show on television all around the world and ... a gazillion people would love to be in my shoes." Uh, weren't you just criticizing the show for putting your stalker on? "Well, that is true. But that's that. I can't talk about it anymore. It's an ongoing police investigation." [AP]
• Three baby-name experts have given the name Seraphina Rose Elizabeth Affleck (Ben and Jen's new baby) an A-minus, a B and a B. [AP]
• Dev Patel from Slumdog Millionaire once moved his drama teacher to tears when he played a child in a hostage crisis in Russia! [Telegraph]
• Wax on, wax off: Jackie Chan is in negotiations to star in a remake of The Karate Kid. The new flick would be relocated to China and Jaden Smith — Will's son — would be the bullied boy. Oh, and Will Smith is producing, naturally. Banzai. [Hollywood Reporter]
• By the by, Will Smith thinks he can be President. "Oh yes, when he's out of office in eight years." [Daily Express]
• We highly doubt that Coolio said that Madonna looks like "a bag of crisps," because he is a rapper from Compton and says chips. But anyway, the story goes that Coolio said: "Have you seen Madonna lately without make up? She’s like a fucking bag of crisps." [The Sun]
• Charlie Sheen's ex-wife, Denise Richards, and new wife, Brooke Mueller, are on "friendly terms" now. [Perez]
• The Osbournes are headed back to TV! This time they'll host Osbournes Reloaded, a variety show with skits, impersonations and audience games. [Reuters]
• Anne Heche: Expecting another son? [People]
• Captain Mike from The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button has filed for divorce. As an aside, his dad is the late Richard Harris, aka Dumbledore. [TMZ]
• OJ Simpson's former attorney, Robert Shapiro, says: "He’s a sociopath." Clarity! [Fox 411]
• LOL! Video of Macy Gray drunk. Thank Dionysus she got in the passenger side of that car. [ONTD via Hollywood.TV]
• Stevie Nicks and Fleetwood Mac: Going on tour for the first time since 2003. Stevie says the magic is still there and they're all excited to go on the road. Now everybody spin! [AP]
• Click if you want to see Lisa Marie Presley's twin girls, and read the words "time to paint Graceland pink." [People]
• Here's a very long story about how Emma "Baby Spice" Bunton lost her baby weight — "it's taken me a year." [Mirror]
• Did you know Rowan Atkinson (from Blackadder and Mr. Bean) once saved his family from a plane crash? "The pilot of the Cessna plane they were taking from Mombasa to Nairobi had passed out and despite a total lack of flying experience, Atkinson snatched the controls and slapped the pilot until he came round." [Daily Express]
• Mary J. Blige had an awesome birthday party in New York over the weekend, with her husband, Jay-Z, Beyoncé, Russell Simmons, Busta Rhymes, Stephon Marbury and a cake "so large that it had to be carried out by two people." [Page Six]
• Flavor Of Love is over, but VH1 felt it needed a replacement, so its new series is For The Love Of Ray J. You know, Brandy's brother? The dude in Kim Kardashian's sex tape? Yeah, I know: Downgrade. And when you're talking about Flavor Flav, it's hard to believe. [Concrete Loop]
• Click to see "Michelle Rodriguez Bin Laden." [The Life Files]
• Chaka Khan needs Activia yogurt, Miracle Whip and 2 ashtrays in her hotel room, among other things. [The Smoking Gun]
• "There are a lot of things I’m grateful for: my health, my family, my career, my family's health. We'll march on. We have to. There’s nothing you can do about it. You can't change what happened. Things could be worse. You remember that, and you go on with your life." — Kevin Bacon, on losing money due to Bernard Madoff's money scheme. [MSNBC via Life & Style]
• "I made love to a chicken in a cabaret in graduate school. It was called A Post-Apocalyptic Tryst. It really is the bravest thing I’ve ever done. I mean, honestly, I’m not that brave. But I did that in front of a lot of people. There wasn’t, like, penetration or anything, but I wined and dined the chicken, and then I made out with the chicken. The chicken wasn’t live; it was, like, a Perdue." — Liev Schreiber. [NY Mag]

• Guy Richie and Madonna have agreed to put their custody battle aside for one day in order to spend Christmas at Richie's estate, so that their children can spend the holiday with both parents. [DailyMail]

• Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards' two daughters were involved in a four-car collision Friday, but are said to be doing just fine. " Sheen "said it could have been much worse," his publicist, Stan Rosenfield, says,"They were in their car seats, and he is extremely grateful for the safety features from Mercedes.” [People]

• Was jealousy over a gift the motive behind the murders of Jennifer Hudson's mother, brother, and nephew? [People]

• Paul Anka's wife, Anna, has been accused of attacking the "Puppy Love" singer with a giant block of ice. According to Page Six, "The flying frozen missile hit him square in the skull, opening such a large gash that Anka had to go to the hospital." [PageSix]

• The family of James Bland, one of the pilots who died piloting the plane crash that injured Travis Barker and DJ AM is speaking out on their son's behalf: ""We know the investigation will eventually show they weren't negligent," says Bland's sister, Laura Martz, "James took piloting very seriously. If he felt the plane wasn't maintained properly, he would've refused to fly that day. Whatever happened on the runway, I'm sure it was beyond [the pilots'] control." [People]

• Kate Moss' boyfriend, Jamie Hince, has put his foot down about Kate's partying and is demanding that she forgo New Year's Eve celebrations so that the couple can spend the evening with Moss' five-year-old daughter, Lila. "‘Jamie says Kate needs to calm her lifestyle down but she seems to have no intention of doing so. She just wants to party all the time," says a source. [DailyMail]

• Will Smith is vowing to get back into the real world after living a somewhat isolated celebrity life. "''I sat there with my children and my 16-year-old son couldn't understand how I didn't know (the election) was over already. He was like 'You're out of touch,''' Smith says. [NYTimes]

• Chris Brown is busy writing songs for Rhianna: “I actually have a couple of songs written already that would be dope collaborations between me and her," Brown says, "And I’m writing for her new album now!”[Just Jared]

• Pulp Fiction screenwriter Roger Avary has been charged with gross vehicular manslaughter. [E!]

• Playboy has issued an apology for the now-infamous "Virgin Mary" cover. "While Playboy Mexico never meant for the cover or images to offend anyone, we recognize that it has created offense, and we as well as Playboy Mexico offer our sincerest apologies," says Raul Sayrols, publisher of Playboy Mexico, "The image is not and never was intended to portray the Virgin of Guadalupe or any other religious figure. The intent was to reflect a Renaissance-like mood on the cover."[Reuters]

• Whitney Port is already dissing the Hills, noting that NYC guys are much better than the ones she left behind in L.A.: ""I was recently in L.A., and I couldn’t help but think, 'Oh my gosh, everyone is kind of the exact same here. You have all these guys in the entertainment industry who are just trying to be smooth and super-cool," Port says, "The guys [in New York] are [still] trying to be cool — guys do that everywhere — but they're more confident and they know what they want." [US Magazine]

• Keanu Reeves is a bit jealous of Hugh Jackman:"I had a little actor envy when Hugh Jackman got to play Wolverine and I didn't," Reeves says, "The claws are cool and I liked his fortitude and honor." [ONTD]

• Scarlett Johansson claims she never opened up about her marriage to Ryan Reynolds to UK Cosmopolitan. Her rep calls it an "obvious attempt...to gain monetarily by misinforming their readers."[E!]

• No Doubt fans: the band will kick off their world tour with an appearance at the Bamboozle Festival in NJ on May 3. [No Doubt]

• "A mother recently gave me her baby and asked, 'Can you please bite his head?'" - Robert Pattinson. Well, that's what happens when you become a sparkly vampire. Nobody would have asked Cedric Diggory a thing like that! [Page Six]

• Paris Hilton has another video in support of her nascent Presidential campaign and, this time, she's got Jeb Bartlett giving her advice. It's not as good as the first, but it just goes to show that President Bartlett was nothing without Josh. [Funny or Die]
• In other really important news, Madonna really doesn't want "Sarah Fucking Palin" at her party and doesn't appreciate the winking. [Huffington Post]
• And the Foo Fighters want McCain to stop using their song "My Hero." Man, does anyone listen to lyrics anymore?[WWLTV]
• McCain thinks we're all his "fellow prisoners." So do we, old man, so do we. [Think Progress]

• Even General Petraeus agrees with Obama about Afghanistan and Pakistan now. Who's naive now? [Washington Independent]
• Oh, and Obama's harped-upon planetarium earmark? Failed, and it was (as I thought) for one of those projectors that makes the stars at planetariums and helps with, you know, science education and shit. It was not one of those things your high school teachers put transparencies on. [Huffington Post]
• Speaking of science education, the Supreme Court is going to hear arguments about when Navy sonar is harming whales. I'm betting they rule in favor of the navy, just because.[Washington Post]
• Yes, yes, rumors continue to swirl about Sarah Palin supposedly appearing on Saturday Night Live this weekend despite the fact that the campaign has floated this every week for the last three weeks in order to soften her appearance. Even Seth Meyers is saying its not true. Just because they want us to think she has a sense of humor doesn't mean she does. [Newsday]

• Did Samantha Ronson refuse to DJ a lesbian bar because "she doesn't do those kind of venues" ? [Page Six]
• Headline of the day: "Lindsay's MySpace Is Like Her Fake Wedding Ring." [E!]
• Additionally, Lindsay says Joe Francis is "yuck." [E!]
• Did Michael Lohan write a blog in which he calls Samantha Ronson "disgusting" and discusses her toilet paper habits? [The Sun]
• Victoria Beckham says she'd like to have another kid but she's too busy right now. "I don’t want another baby for two years because I’m working so hard on my fashion business. I haven’t got time. We would like another child but it won’t be for a couple of years yet." She also says: "David and I still go out on our own and we have a real laugh together. I love him more now than I did when we first met." Awww. Sniff! [The Sun]
• The Jolie-Pitt Foundation has just donated another $1 million, this time to fund the Human Rights Watch's work in Burma and Zimbabwe. [Perez Hilton]

• It's official! Whitney Port, the girl who was flown to Paris by Condé Nast but could not pronounce Givenchy, has her own spinoff of The Hills. The series starts shooting immediately in New York and will follow Whitney's life working for Diane von Furstenberg. Can Whit hold her own? Can she pronounce Houston Street? All will be revealed in 2009. [E!]
• Shanna Moakler, who was "devastated" when she learned of the plane crash that left her ex-husband badly burned, is spending time with Travis Barker, trying to lift his spirits. [People]
• Will George Clooney come back for the final season of ER? (Hint: No.) [Reuters]
• MTV is working on a "black version" of The Muppets with, who else, Kanye West. [Rush & Molloy]
• Blake Incarcerated says he'd rather stay in jail than go to rehab, probably because you can get drugs in jail. [The Sun]
• Kate Moss has been "trying to forget" her breakup with Jamie Hince by hanging out in Paris. [The Sun]
• A judge has thrown out a paparazzo's suit against Keanu Reeves; Keanu hit the dude with his car as he was trying to inch out of a parking space and the guy tripped over his own feet and hurt his wrist. [AP]
• Is Kristin Chenoweth dating Jeff Probst? They're both very pretty. (She says "We're really good friends.") [E!]
• Jonny Lee Miller, ex-husband of Angelina Jolie and star of TV show Eli Stone, is expecting a child with wife Michele Hicks. It will be their first! [People]
• Vanessa Minnillo and Nick Lachey may have split up, not that you care. Also maybe on the rocks: Josh Duhamel and Fergie. [E!]
• Radar did a photo shoot with Shannen Doherty and she looks all angst-y. [Radar]
• Isaac Hayes has left part of his estate to the Isaac Hayes Foundation, which promotes literacy, music and nutrition. [AP]
• Hugh Hefner says Holly Madison is not dating Criss Angel. "Holly shares my bed on a nightly basis," Hef says. But! He admits that his relationships with Holly, Kendra and Bridget are "in transition." [E!]
• Michael Phelps admits he pees in the pool. And! If you missed Phelps playing Dr. McSwimmy in a Grey's Anatomy spoof before the Emmys, you can see it here. [LA Times]
• Pete Doherty was a "chess-mad schoolboy" when he was a kid. [The Sun]
• Charlie Sheen's wife had emergency gall bladder surgery even though she's in the early stages of pregnancy, yikes. She's gonna be okay. [E!]
• Jennifer Hudson's new CD includes a duet with fellow American Idol alum Fantasia. That's a lot of voice on one track. [Fox 411]
• Janet Jackson has left her record label. Stay tuned as she tries to figure out how to stay relevant. [E!]
• "I would like to go to university and complete a degree and so that will mean a break from acting. I've always tried to balance my education with my acting career, but I just don't think it will be possible to juggle it with a degree course. I have a need now to study." — Emma "Hermione Granger" Watson. [Daily Mail]
• "I am a size 27 jeans. My measurements are 34, 26, 39. But remember I am 5'2" and ½ and everyone carries their weight in different places. I am really sick and tired of people being so mean and nasty and assume I am lying. JUST FOR YOU NON-BELIEVERS, I WILL POST A VIDEO BLOG OF ME SHOWING YOU GUYS MY SIZE 27 JEANS LATER TONIGHT!" — Kim Kardashian. [MSNBC]

• Following the terrible plane crash in which drummer Travis Barker and Adam "DJ AM" Goldstein were seriously injured, there were reports that Chris Baker, Travis's friend and business partner, was on his way to be home with his pregnant wife. These reports were erroneous. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Both Lindsay and Sam blogged about the horrifying plane crash. Wrote LL: "It's so scary to think that life can end so fast...we must all treasure each and every moment—and be thankful for what we have." [E!]
• Travis Barker is burned "mostly from the waist down." DJ AM is "really really badly burned," and the worst is on his face. [E!]
• Mandy Moore has rushed to the bedside of ex-boyfriend DJ AM. Travis Barker's ex-wife Shanna Moakler hopped a flight to be with Travis. [E!]
• Random celebs react to the DJ AM and Travis Barker news. [E!]
• DJ AM and Travis Barker could be hospitalized for weeks but are expected to fully recover. [CNN]
• A tire blowout could be to blame for the plane crash. [People]

• At the Emmys last night, the dresses were pretty, but boring. Christina Applegate looked awesome. [Yahoo News]
• On the red carpet last night, Christina Applegate said: "I've got a pretty dress on and lipstick, and [it's] something I haven't done in two months." She also addressed her breast cancer and the double mastectomy she endured: "For me to have a voice and be the voice of a 30-something-year-old girl going through this and dispelling the misnomers that it's an older woman's disease is a big part of this for me." [People]
• This report says that since the Golden Globes were almost canceled and the Oscars were anticlimactic, the Emmys were festive and glamourous but not ridiculously over the top. [MSNBC]
• Tina Fey lost her purse during the Emmys. She also said of Sarah Palin: "I want to be done playing this lady Nov. 5. So if anybody can help me be done playing this lady Nov. 5, that would be good for me." [AP]
• Is Lindsay coming out, little by little, on her MySpace — instead of in one big "Yes, I'm gay" cover story on a tabloid mag? [LA Times]
• Someone is trying to sell 12 pictures from Casey Aldridge's digital camera that show Britney Spears, Jamie Lynn Spears, daughter Maddie and Casey… and in one picture, Jamie Lynn is breastfeeding Maddie and her breast is exposed. Because JLS is a minor, selling or buying the pix could be a violation of child pornography laws, even though they're not sexual. [TMZ]
• George Michael was arrested with crack in a public restroom. Um. Crack as in drugs. Not ass crack. As far as we know. He was taken to a police station and given a "caution." [BBC News]
• George Michael says: "I want to apologise to my fans for screwing up again, and to promise them I'll sort myself out. And to say sorry to everybody else, just for boring them." [Perez Hilton]
• Comic Sandra Bernhard says a "gang rape" joke she made about Sarah Palin was part of her act. "I certainly wish Governor Palin no harm. I'd just like her to explain to me how she can hold such outrageous views — and then go back to Alaska." [UPI]
• Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds were out on the Lower East Side of New York recently wearing matching bowler hats. They went to some bar and the doorman wanted to take a picture with Scarlett when she snapped, "I'm not the Statue of Liberty." [Page Six]
• Jack McBrayer, who plays Kenneth on 30 Rock, says Jennifer Aniston's stint for the show was "fantastic." "I think we are all star-struck with her." [People]
• Singer Natalie Cole, who recently revealed she had hepatitis C, has been hospitalized as a result of side effects from her medication and a heavy promotional schedule. [USA Today]
• Mel Gibson just bought David Duchovny and Tea Leoni's Malibu home for $11.5 million. Hmm, liquidation of assets… Are David and Tea going to get divorced? [TMZ]
• Ali Lohan hopped on the back of a male friend's motorcycle and had to be rushed to the hospital for minor injuries after a minor accident last month. She got "scraped up." A friend says, "I think she may have wanted to impress this boy." [ONTD]
• Miley Cyrus is sick of being Hannah Montana. [ONTD via TMZ]
• Kate Moss and Jamie Hince have split up and it is FINAL. [The Sun]
• A "mystery hunk" gave Kate Moss a lapdance. [Mirror]
• Does Pete Doherty want Kate Moss back? [Mirror]
• Hugh Grant and Jemima Khan: Back on. [Daily Express]
• Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham says: "You know, I could just go shopping every day and sit on my bum. But I’d be so bored. I don’t even go shopping any more. I run four miles, seven days a week. I am eating more. I think you do eat more when you’re working out." She also says her new short hair wasn't her idea: "I just told the hairdresser to use his imagination." [The Sun]
• Sienna Miller is going to be in that Guy Ritchie Sherlock Holmes film, which means she'll be reunited with Jude Law on screen. Awkward! [Mirror]
• The woman who is suing two photographers and a paparazzi agency over a video that shows Heath Ledger doing drugs has amended her lawsuit. [News.com.au]
• Kanye West, John Legend, Sheryl Crow, Stevie Wonder and others can be heard on Yes We Can: Voices of a Grassroots Movement, a CD for sale exclusively through Barack Obama's campaign. [USA Today]
• John Lennon had a terrible temper and once screamed into son Sean's ear so loudly his ear was damaged and he had to go to the hospital. [Page Six]
• Heather Mills is donating one million dollars worth of vegan food to children in the South Bronx, one of the poorest neighborhoods in New York. What kids in the ghetto dream of: Soy burgers. [The Star]
• Heather says: "The public adores me... I haven't got a bad word to say about Paul... men are falling over themselves to ask me out... my only interest in life is helping others." [Daily Mail]
• Holland Taylor, who plays Charlie Sheen's mom on Two And A Half Men, commented on the news that Charlie and his wife Brooke are expecting a baby: "I think he's a wonderful daddy to his girls – he just adores them, he's very sweet with them. [But] it will be very interesting to see Charlie with a boy. It'll bring out a whole other side of him, I'm sure." [People]
• Arnold Schwarzenegger confirms that he used to smoke weed with Tommy Chong. [TMZ]
• Robert Wagner had an affair with Barbara Stanwyck, his co-star in the 1953 film Titanic, who was 23 years his senior. [Reuters]
• Jamie Oliver and his wife Jools are expecting a new baby to join daughters Poppy Honey, 6 and Daisy Boo, 5. May we suggest some possible names? Violet Love, Rose Sugar, Carnation Milk. [Mirror]
• Steven Tyler performed in pants he'd gotten from Cher. [Fox 411]
• Jenna Jameson and Tito Ortiz: Having twins. [Perez Hilton]
• You know how Audrina moved out of Lauren Conrad's house? It was supposed to be an "exclusive" story for a major tabloid mag. But now everyone knows. But! Since she already signed a deal, Audrina gets to keep the money. We'll see what Us Weekly has on the cover on Wednesday. [TMZ]
• Holly Madison and Criss Angel: Still hanging out in Las Vegas, though they deny that they're dating. They were seen dancing and kissing in a club. [Perez Hilton]
• Rachel Bilson will star in an indie romance in which she plays a TV actress living in Hollywood. Way to show your range! [Variety]
• David Blaine will hang upside down above Central Park for 60 hours and could go blind due to the blood pressure in his eyes. Additionally, he could bore us to tears. [Mirror]
• Be prepared to take Mariah Carey seriously as an actress: She plays the battered wife of a state trooper in Tennessee, and just got cast in Push, where she'll play a Harlem social worker. She's also developing a movie musical based, um, on her Christmas album. [Rush & Molloy]
• "I gained five pounds and it’s like a national scandal." — Eva Longoria. [The Sun]
• "I will no longer attempt to do any sports movie, anymore. Any sports. No golf movie. I'm retired from sports-genre films. You know, I think I filled my quota." — Will Ferrell. [USA Today]
• When you were younger, did you ever dream about being royalty? "No. I was a tomboy. When I was a child, I made mud pies—sort of just adding water to mud and squishing it together. I didn't wear a skirt until I think I was 14. The princess thing was the last thing on my list." — Keira Knightley. [Newsweek]
• "My breasts have had a brilliant career. I've just tagged along for the ride." — Pamela Anderson. [Daily Mail]
• "I'm 37. I have nothing to say about the new 90210. Who gives a shit." — Sarah Silverman. [E!]