Jezebel: celebrity fit club

Loose Lips

Jessica — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 17:45:00 EDT

Dustin "Screech" Diamond, he of the crap personality on Celebrity Fit Club and cringe inducing sex tape, is writing a tell-all about his days on Saved By The Bell. There will be "sexual escapades among cast members, drug use, and hardcore partying," says Nymag.com. Not gonna lie: we are deeply excited about this. • Brooke Hogan is considering posing nude in Playboy. Even if she does, Kim Kardashian will always be the reality TV Playboy crossover nearest to our hearts. • And speaking of our Kimmy, apparently she's in a feud with Shanna Moakler? Apparently it has to do with Shanna's ex Travis Barker, whom she thinks Kim is hitting on…or something. Anyway, Shanna said, "I have for some time now avoided Kim Kardashian at all costs. I've avoided events, parties etc. in order to not see her." [NYM, Us, TMZ]

Celebrity Fit Club: Joanie Loves...Chocha?

Tracie — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 11:00:00 EDT

On last night's episode of Celebrity Fit Club, everyone got a chance to let loose at the bachelor party thrown for cast member Brian Dunkleman. Erin Moran — Joanie from Happy Days — was particularly excited about the stripper that showed up, and went to town on the edible panties she was wearing. Clip above.

Celebrity Fit Club: Toccara Is Totally Not Fat

Tracie — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 14:00:00 EDT

Granted, Toccara Jones did voluntarily go on a weight loss/fitness show, so it was a little ridiculous that she didn't want to follow the diet that Dr. Ian assigned to her on Celebrity Fit Club, but we kinda get where she was coming from when she freaked out on last night's episode. She is seriously gorgeous, and it must have been really tough to hear that she needed to lose weight, especially when she is obviously so happy and confident with herself the way that she is. The best thing ever? When Dr. Ian told her to have some class and she came back with, "Kiss my ass!" and "No, fuck that!" Clip above.

Toccara Loses Weight And Her Mind On New Celebrity Fit Club

Tracie — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 15:00:00 EST

The new season of Celebrity Fit Club premieres March 13 and it looks awesome. This time around, four Fit Club veterans return (Toccara Jones, Dustin Diamond, Willie Aames, Tina Yothers) to battle against four newbies (Erin Moran, A.J. Benza, Brian Dunkleman, Sommora) in a really intense Boot Camp program that pushes them to the limit, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. Toccara goes apeshit on Dr. Stacy, then tells the panel to kiss her ass for suggesting that her now-trim figure is "dysfunctional." Dustin Diamond gets into it with Harvey, and then sheds a tear saying, "I just came here to work out, man." And who knew that Erin Moran (Joanie from Happy Days) was such a treasure?! She shakes her tits at the camera, gives Toccara a lap dance, then states that she has a hemorrhoid from "pushing too hard." Clip above.

Being Weight-Obsessed Makes You the Biggest Loser

Jessica — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 10:30:00 EDT

Perennial dieters have a new fixation for their weight neurosis: competing with the contestants on the Biggest Loser. According to a New York Times "Thursday Styles" section "trend" piece, The Biggest Loser is bumming viewers out because they're not losing weight as quickly as the contestants on the show itself. The fans don't seem to take into account that each person on The Biggest Loser is sequestered at weight loss boot camp for the duration of the show, divorced from the temptation of new Doritos flavors (Blazin' Buffalo & Ranch!) and undermining office cookie pushers. Even with a team of weight loss gurus at your disposal, reality-show fit clubs are not all they're cracked up to be. British TV presenter Lowri Turner had a pretty shitty time on ITV's Celebrity Fit Club. In fact, her team captain told her before the final episode, ""If you don't lose any weight this week I'm going to punch you in the face."

Lowri's experiences in non-televised "slimming clubs" weren't much better:

We were pitted against one another, albeit more subtly. Forget the idea that it's a communal effort — this is dog eat dog (even if that is all you get to eat all week). At the center of a slimming club meeting is the weigh-in. This involves queuing up for either a pat on the head by the group leader or a disapproving click of the tongue...As you inch towards the scales...you feel yourself metamorphosing from an adult with a job, a family and a life into a pathetic five-year-old begging for a "well done" from the teacher. There is usually a "slimmer of the week" prize for the most well-behaved dieter, and although stories about forcing those who have "failed" to wear piggie masks may be apocryphal, these days at least, those slimmers who have gained flab do not get to stand up and take a bow.

Turner's most impressive revelation is at the end of the article. "I did lose weight at all three slimming clubs I attended. However, I also became obsessed by my weight, incredibly boring and entirely lacking in humor. Deprivation made me grumpy and selfish." And seriously. Have you ever tried to talk to someone who is seriously dieting? All they can discuss is fucking baby carrots. There are more important things in life. Like Cool Ranch Doritos.

Big Losers, But Can Viewers Keep the Pace? [New York Times]
Friends, Dignity, Self Respect ... Weight Wasn't All I Lost At My Slimming Club [Daily Mail]
Earlier: Your Coworker With The Candy And Cookies Is Trying To Make You Fat
Related: Why do women Feel OK About Their Bodies Until Other Women Show Up? [Psychology Today]