• A fan of Britney Spears rushed up on stage and tried to dance with Brit Brit on Saturday night in Connecticut. He was quickly surrounded by backup dancers and "escorted" away. There's video. [Perez]

• The dude in question (at Britney's concert) was drunk. He was arrested for breach of the peace and also booked for being "highly uncooperative" while in custody. [Daily Mail]
• Madonna's case in the adoption of Mercy James will be in the Malawi Supreme Court today. Will Mercy's biological father  who opposes the adoption  try to derail the proceedings? [Times of London, UPI]
• Madonna and Demi Moore have bonded over Kabbalah and the fact that they both have younger men; a source says they're hoping to arrange a double date soon. Do you think they'll have milkshakes? One glass, four straws? [Daily Mail]
• Madonna's daughter Lourdes hearts Lady GaGa! Madge and Lola went to Lady G's show in NYC and Lourdes was "singing along to every word." What's amusing is that since GaGa's megablonde and cartoonish, she's almost like a young Madonna, no? [Gatecrasher]
• David Hasselhoff was rushed to the hospital for alcohol poisoning over the weekend. His 16-year-old daughter found him unconscious and he was "barely breathing" when they got to the emergency room. [Radar Online]
• Amy Winehouse left the hospital  where she'd been after collapsing for dehydration  and went to a bar. [The Sun]
• Angelina Jolie's "curved bullet kill" in Wanted has been nominated for an MTV Movie Award in a new category: Best WTF Moment. Possibly because MTV would love it if Angie showed up. [E!]
• By the by: Andrew Morton, who penned biographies of Princess Di, Monica Lewinsky and Tom Cruise, will write about Angelina Jolie next. [Page Six]
• Casey Aldridge, boyfriend and baby daddy to Jamie Lynn Spears, is out of the hospital after flipping his truck. A "source" says "They're both at the house in Liberty [Miss.]... Now Jamie Lynn will have two babies to care for." [E!, People]
• "I'm not embarrassed about being bisexual," says Pink, according to this disreputable paper. [News Of The World]
• Pink has Twittered: "I just read that I'm bisexual. So 1991. Good thing people write articles about me so I can get my facts [straight]." Apparently the interview with the News Of The World was "entirely fabricated." [NY Daily News]
• Words you probably never thought you would see together: "Robert Pattinson's penis implant." [Yahoo News via Bang Showbiz]
• Crap. Jenny McCarthy has inked a deal with Oprah Winfrey's Harpo Productions and will develop a talk show, which, of course, Jenny will host. What do you think she'll talk about? Autism? Anyone? [Yahoo News via Reuters]
• Wolverine had an $87 million opening weekend, which is huge. But holding on to it might be tough: Star Trek opens this Friday. [NY Post]
• Now that you've suffered through Wolverine, know this: Hugh Jackman will star in Ghostopolis, a flick about a man who works for the government's Supernatural Immigration Task Force. His job is to send ghosts who have escaped into our world back to Ghostopolis. It's what they call "high concept." [The Hollywood Reporter]
• A writer hangs out with famed trainer Tracy Anderson: "According to Tracy, if I commit to an hour of her exercise regime six days a week, for the rest of my life, just like Gwynnie and Madge (whose remarkable bodies she proudly takes responsibility for), a 'teeny, tiny, lean and mean' figure will be mine. Voilà." [Daily Mail]
• Scarlett Johansson's directorial debut  a segment for New York, I Love You  is going straight to DVD. It's being called "unwatchable" and a source says, "It was really bad, so it was cut." [Daily Mail]
• Bethenny Frankel, one of the Real Housewives of New York, went out to a Hula-Hoop competition with a date… and the Times. She wore "a baby T and skin-tight Paige jeans." And said: ""My friends call me 'That Girl,' like Marlo Thomas. Like, I'm in New York trying to figure it out." [NY Times]
• Real Housewife Kelly Bensimon says of her ex, the guy she allegedly gave a black eye: "What guy does that? He acted like he was Rihanna." Her attorney calls Nick Stefanov a "jilted moron." [Newser via NY Daily News]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Elisabeth Hasselbeck says: "I'm definitely not paying attention to my pregnancy." That makes two of us! [People]
• Jay-Z is living in post-racial America, you guys. He performed at the University of Arizona and later blogged: "On the show as well were Third Eye Blind and Kelly Clarkson ... I thought that had to be the oddest pairing ever, but soon realized it's what I've always professed. There's NO such thing as Black music or White music only Good or Bad music." [MTV via RapRadar.com]
• Rihanna's new man is an ex; she was seeing Negus Sealy before she "made it." A source says: "He's a really smart guy - clever, good looking, very cool. All the girls adore him and call him the Love God." [Daily Mail, NY Post]
• Victoria and David Beckham are house-hunting in Italy; he's been playing for AC Milan while Vicky and the kids stayed in L.A. since the boys are enrolled in CA schools, but now that summer's coming, it's Ciao, Hollywood. [Daily Mail]
• John "The Player" Mayer is single again. It seems that model he was dating talked too much. To the press. Although who knows. [Gatecrasher]
• Cindy Crawford's husband, Rande Gerber, is being sued for sexual harassment by two female employees at a San Diego business he owns. [Page Six]
• Someone asked Russell Brand if he would shag reported virgin Susan Boyle. "I don't think I should be the one to do that," he said. "Susan deserves a nice strapping farmer from the North." Related: What is wrong with people?!?! [The Sun]
• Gisele Bundchen rarely poses for pictures with her new husband Tom Brady: "Tom hates being photographed," she explains. [Gatecrasher]
• Mark McGrath is no longer the host of Extra, so he's trying to make music again. Sugar Ray comeback album, people. Titled: Music For Cougars. Naturally. [Page Six]
• Princess Eugenie was mugged in Cambodia. [Mirror]
• Enrique Iglesias and his manager allegedly ran over the foot of an 11-year-old girl as they were leaving a radio station appearance back in 2007. Lawsuit alert! [TMZ]
• A Little Britain movie could be coming to the United States. [The Sun]
• Sting's daughter, Coco Sumner, fell and fractured her skull outside of a restaurant. She is recovering "well." [Daily Mail
• Vanessa Hudgens has settled a breach of contract lawsuit filed against her by a producer who worked with her very early in her career. [UPI]
• Another day, another claim that Coldplay's music is stolen. This time it's Cat Stevens  sorry  Yusuf Islam, who says: "There's been this argument about Coldplay stealing this melody from Joe Satriani, but, if you listen to it, it's mine! It's the Foreigner Suite, it is!" [The Sun]
• An excerpt from a Paul Newman biography has details about the actor's relationship with Joanne Woodward  which started when he was married to someone else. "I was probably too immature to make a success of my first marriage," Newman allegedly said. "Guilty as hell" was how he described himself about his first marriage, adding: "And I'll carry it with me for the rest of my life." [Daily Mail]
• Blind item: "Which D-list rapper got in a hemp, er, heap, of trouble with event sponsors when he lit up a joint at their bash? They couldn't kick him out because he was the 'big' celebrity name of the night, but they didn't end up paying him." [Gatecrasher]
• "Famous female singers tend to moan and whine a lot about being famous. Damn, I'm Pink and my bank account hasn't seen a red zero for a long time, and I can do what I love best  sing. Isn't that something that makes life better?"  Pink. [News Of The World]
• "When you come to film in Rome, the official statement to you is that the Vatican has no influence. Everything progressed very smoothly, but unofficially a couple of days before we were to start filming in several of our locations, it was explained to us that through back channels and so forth that the Vatican had exerted some influence. Was I surprised? No. Am I a little frustrated at times? Sure."  Ron Howard, on shooting Angels & Demons. [AP]
• "It is good fun and the part feels like it was written for me. Chuck has witty lines, gets to dress up and has very nice clothes […] [Sometimes] I [keep and] wear the suits. They're killer, don't you think? There is a lot of stuff I wouldn't wear, but he really puts it together very well. The whole outfit just comes together as an interesting look."  Ed Westwick. [Mirror]
• "Nia is like a rock star over there. You walk down the streets of Greece and people just go nuts, it's like you're with Tom Cruise or something."  Rachel Dratch, who is in the new Nia Vardalos flick, My Life In Ruins. [CBS News]
• "I've always rather admired you but now I realise you're an absolute . I'm only sorry I didn't get a chance to kick you when I fell over – maybe next time."  Judi Dench, in response to a critic who called her latest play "deeply dodgy" and "fit only for pretentious masochists." [Telegraph]
• "All of these shows are derivative of the shows that we used to do. The topics, some of the story lines, they're all very similar to what we did every day on the show for 11 years. When you have dynamic people that have some sort of conflict and put them in a confined space together, it's bound to be dramatic."  Ricki Lake, new host of Charm School, thinks the reality genre is a lot like her old talk show. [NY Daily News]

• In 2007 Sean Penn and wife Robin Wright said they were divorcing, but then reconciled. On Friday Penn filed for "legal separation with minor children," three days before their thirteenth wedding anniversary. [Extra]

• People has released its 100 Most Beautiful People issue and Christina Applegate took the cover, which Perez Hilton thinks Robert Pattinson deserved. Isn't beating cancer just a bit more impressive than starring in a vampire movie? [Perez Hilton]
• In the cover story, Christina Applegate says that she's trying to embrace her body after having a double mastectomy. "You have to get through the physical transformations then buck up, go to work and try to be the normal, happy Christina for everyone around you," she says, adding that her boyfriend helped her through it. "I'm very grateful to Martyn [Lenoble] for coming along at a time that he did because he's been my rock through all of this," Applegate says. "He gave me something to really want to live for and something to smile about." [People]
• Also among People's Most Beautiful People: Michelle Obama, Dev Patel, and Nick and Joe Jonas. [People, Reuters]
• Director of Robert Pattinson's new film How to Be says, "He was thinking about giving up acting and maybe doing music solely when this role [in How To Be] came along ... He wanted to play the roles he wasn't getting." [People]
• A judge ruled the the $1.4 million jewels Rihanna was wearing the night of the beating can be released from evidence and returned to their owner. [TMZ]
• Tyra Banks testified today against her accused stalker, Brady Green, saying: "I fear my safety. I feel extremely vulnerable. I fear the safety of my staff. My family." She said her staff doesn't tell her about fans, but "They said this person threatened one of my staffers. At that moment that was it. The first thing is there's this person who's more than a fan." [People]
• Tyra Banks says that Brady Green is "more aggressive" than a regular fan and she has been forced to hire security. Green sent Tyra love letters and flowers and was arrested when he snuck into her studio. If convicted he faces 90 days in jail. [TMZ]
• Jon Gosselin of Jon and Kate Plus Eight responded to the photos of him leaving a nightclub with a woman who was not Kate, saying, "Like most people, I have male and female friends and I'm not going to end my friendships just because I'm on TV. However, being out...late at night showed poor judgment on my part. What makes me sick is that my careless behavior has put my family in this uncomfortable position. My family is the most important thing in my life and it kills me that these allegations have hurt them." [Entertainment Weekly]
• Liev Schreiber missed the L.A. premiere of X-Men Origins: Wolverine because his 21-month-old son, Sasha was sick. His rep said, "Sasha got home today and is feeling much better after being hospitalized on Tuesday night with respiratory problems." [People, TMZ]
• When Hugh Jackman heard that 800 people lined up a day early for the X-Men Origins: Wolverine premiere in Tempe, Arizona, he personally called a local cafe and treated everyone to a breakfast of coffee and pastries. [The Daily Express]
• TMZ has a copy of the police report from Casey Aldridge's truck crash. The report says "for some unknown reason" Aldridge's truck went off the road and ran into a ditch. Then he "overcorrected and lost control" of the truck. It went back on to the road and then rolled over. A passenger says Aldridge wasn't drinking. [TMZ]
• Al Roker will appear on The Weather Channel in a new show called Wake Up With Al. THe show will air from 6 am to 7 am so Al can continue working on The Today Show. [AP]
• Kate Walsh's soon-to-be ex, Alex Young, demanded to know how much money he deserved from his half of the home they purchased together. They bought it for $4.95 million and now it is worth $3.6 million, so it doesn't look like he'll be getting that much, especially since Walsh paid most of the down payment and he left her with the mortgage. [TMZ]
• Shauna Sand has obtained a restraining order against estranged husband Romain Chavent. She claims, he held her down, bit her lips, and tried to suffocate her. [TMZ]
• 71-year-old Jane Fonda slipped into her 1980s workout leotard for a skit at a New York charity event. [The Daily Mail]
• Susan Boyle says reports that she is leaving Britain's Got Talent are totally untrue. "There is no way I am quitting the show - the only way I'd leave the show is if Simon Cowell kicked me out!" she said. [The Independent]
• In 2004 Sharon Stone became a mail-order minister so she could marry restaurateur Michael Bourseau and stylist Brenda Swanson, but now the couple has filed for divorce. [TMZ]
• Ashanti will star as Dorothy in The Wiz this summer at the New York City Center. [NY Times]
• Toby Keith, who has had several celebrity feuds over the years, said, "if you're gonna tell a lie about me, and then back it up like it's the truth to try to make your star brighter ... yeah, I've got a problem with that ... If you can't do as well as I'm doing, then the only thing you can do is take shots at me, but that's expected." [AP]
• Christian Bale says of his leaked tirade at a technician on set, "I did what I did, I'm not hiding from that - I went overboard." He continued, "But there is an essential trust and it's not a tacit one, it's a verbal one, a spoken one, which is every sound guy says, 'We are not only not recording, we are not listening.' So, well, there goes that." [The Star]
• The Good Morning America anchors pranked Matthew McConaughey this morning by letting him show up to an empty studio in New York while they were all in D.C. celebrating Obama's first 100 days. There's video of McConaughey wandering around the set, as the anchors cackle here: [VideoGum]
• Tony Bennett donated a watercolor painted of friend Duke Ellington to the Smithsonian museum today in honor of the 110th anniversary of Ellington's birth. [AP]
• Usher says his 17-month-old son, Usher Raymond V, has "got my name and it seems to me he has my personality," but Usher doesn't want him to be a performer necessarily. "I hope whatever he chooses to do in his life, he goes after it with passion and dedication," he says. [People]
• At least one Jonas brother doesn't plan to be making music with his brothers forever. Joe Jonas says, "I guess personally I would love to do more acting, maybe movies – that would be really cool." Either that or he may, "write a book one day, because I love to read. The Alchemist is my favorite book of all time." [People]
• Joe Jonas also says of "Forever and Always" the song Taylor Swift wrote about their breakup, "It's flattering ... It's always nice to hear their side of the story."[ONTD]
• Grace Jones is known for being late, but she showed up last night to a performance attended by many celebrities less than 30 minutes before the end of the party. When she finally did arrive, she descended to the dance floor in a clear glass elevator, wearing a cape and a mask in the shape of a butterfly. [WWD]
• Sex and the City costume designer Patricia Field says of Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick having twins, "It's going to be interesting, ... I think that she could have fierce daughters. Fierce daughters!" [People]

• Tyra Banks will be in court this week; she's expected to testify in the trial of her alleged stalker, Brady Green.

How weird will it be to be face-to-face with the guy? Oh, and get this: Green's lawyer's argument is that Tyra is to blame. "She invites fans that are inspired by her show to reach out to her," defense lawyer Sydney O'Hagen said in opening arguments at Green's trial. "Mr. Green was a fan, albeit perhaps an overzealous fan." Green allegedly sent flowers and love letters to Tyra, and then when an employee of her talk show refused to give him the address of the studio over the phone, Green said: "You're fucking lying, I'm going to find you and slit your throat." [NY Daily News, NY Post, AP]

• Casey Aldridge, the father of Jamie Lynn Spears' baby, was injured in a car accident yesterday; he was taken to the hospital with non-life threatening injuries. [Breitbart]
• This report claims that Casey Aldridge has a "cracked skull." [NY Post]
• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's wedding had a "spring feeling," meaning the colors were green and yellow and people drank margaritas while eating appetizers like tuna tartare and chicken salad. No one noticed the glowering specter in the corner, the one named "In The Grand Scheme These People Are Irrelevant." [People]
• Miss California, Carrie Prejean, received a "hero's welcome" when appearing at a San Diego megachurch. "'You need to apologize to the gay community. You need to not talk about your faith. This has everything to do with you representing California and saving the brand,'" Prejean recalled being told. "I was representing California. I was representing the majority of people in California." She also said: "I learned that God has a bigger crown than any man can give you." [AP]
• Clearcast, a TV company in the UK, wants to cut scenes from Keira Knightley's domestic violence ad before it is broadcast; specifically, the scenes where the actress is being thrown to the ground and kicked  the organization believes it is too violent. [Telegraph]
• The Sanskrit tattoo on Rihanna's hip is misspelled, but the tattoo artist says she wouldn't care: "It's copied off of a necklace that she got from somebody important to her," he explains. [UPI]
• Actress Vanessa A. Williams  not to be confused with Ugly Betty's Vanessa L. Williams  is using Rihanna's name on an invitation to a violence-prevention event. Rihanna is not involved with the organization, but the copy reads: "On February 8th, when famed singer Rihanna was allegedly beaten by her boyfriend, she was not alone." [Page Six]
• Susan Boyle auditioned for a TV show 14 years ago, and was rejected. [Daily Mail]
• Guy Ritchie has purchased a house 200 yards from Madonna's London mansion, putting him "as close as possible" to the kids. In addition, a source says Guy laughed when he found out that her Madgesty's new man, Jesus Luz, speaks very little English, saying: "Blimey, no wonder the whole thing works so perfectly." [The Sun]
• Is Jesus Luz only getting modeling jobs because of his relationship with Madonna? [Page Six]
• This paper claims Amy Winehouse is being called the "Pied Piper Of St. Lucia," since she loves hanging out with kids. But you get the feeling that the only person calling her that is whomever wrote this story. [The Sun]
• Henry Ian Cusick, aka Desmond on Lost, is being sued by a former ABC Entertainment employee for sexual harassment. He's been married for 3 years after being with his wife for 14 years and the couple has 3 sons. [Daily Mail]
• Apparently two high school guys saw Kate Winslet in her workout gear and commented on her "big hot booty." [Page Six]
• "Every Friday that he's shooting a movie, Hugh Jackman comes to work with a bag full of lottery tickets. He gives them to everyone who works on his movies: co-stars, camera crews, set hands, the people who cater the food. He doesn't play." [USA Today]
• Miley Cyrus says that she and Nick Jonas are just friends and not back together  if you heard that he is her boyfriend it is just a "stupidddd rumor." She Twittered: "It makes me sad to think that people out there aren't friends with THEIR ex bf, because let me tell u it IS possible." [People]
• Jennifer Hudson performed a concert in her hometown of Chicago  her first since her mother, brother and nephew were killed there. She didn't talk about the murders but did dedicate "You Pulled Me Though" to family members in the audience. [UPI]
• Will you look at the way Tina is looking at Beyoncé? It is soooo "tired mom." [Concrete Loop]
• Speaking of Beyoncé, guess who has another hit flick? Obsessed was number one at the box office with $28 million. [MSNBC Scoop, NY Daily News]
• Surely this will come as shocking, shocking news: The ladies of The Real Housewives Of New Jersey have ties to the mob. [NY Daily News]
• If you're a dedicated fan, get your credit card ready: Various props from the newest George Clooney flick, Up In The Air, are going up for sale. [UPI]
• Kobe Bryant demanded creative control over the documentary Spike Lee filmed of the basketball star, and an insider claims "Spike completely yielded." [Page Six]
• Jon Hamm and ladyfriend Jennifer Westfeldt have formed a production company named Points West Pictures. They have 3 projects in development and all will feature at least one of the couple. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Jamie Foxx has recorded a message for Nineline, a crisis helpline run by Convenant House, the agency which works with homeless kids. Says a spokesperson: "Now kids in crisis will not only hear a reassuring voice but a well-known, positive role model." [Hollywood Reporter]
• If you're interested in reading an essay about Mike Tyson written by Ice-T, click here. [The Daily Beast]
• There's tension and "cattiness" in the Pussycat Dolls; in a recent concert, Melody said: "Thank you so much for supporting me - even if I'm not featured, you know what I'm saying?" [NY Daily News]
• Katy Perry and Travis McCoy of Gym Class Heroes: Back on. [Gatecrasher]
• Kate Walsh's divorce is getting nasty  there's a quibble over the accounting firm Walsh is using, which her estranged husband Alex Young says is doing PR for Walsh. [TMZ]
• Daniel Radcliffe is the "12th richest young person in the UK." He's got more cash than Princes William and Harry! [Telegraph]
• If you have $27,9995,000, you can buy the Holmby Hills house of Kimberly and Hugh Hefner. [LA Times]
• Yes, yes, James Franco's student films are inspired by gay poetry. [NY Mag]
• Ugly Betty returns this week, ending the rumor that the show was cancelled. [NY Daily News]
• Liam Neeson and his sons are "keeping busy with normal life"  like going to Knicks games. [People, Mirror]
• In this article, Dominic Monaghan spills on all of his travel memories. He says: "I do remember a fantastic holiday to Thailand with Billy Boyd and Orlando Bloom in my early twenties. We were all single, young and up for an adventure. We went to Bangkok then took off to the islands." [Independent]
• Curious what's up with Michael Keaton? He's directed a film, The Merry Gentlemen. And he's broken his foot. [LA Times]
• In a lengthy interview, Natasha McElhone talks about dealing with grief since the death of her husband one year ago. [Guardian]
• Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood, 61, plans to marry his girlfriend Ekaterina, 20, just as soon as he can get a "speedy" divorce from his wife, Jo, 54. [Mirror]
• Actor Campbell Scott got engaged in November, but we're just hearing about it now? Eh, congrats. [People]
• "Kylie Minogue and Richard Branson lose money but make UK rich list." [News.com.au]
• Aerosmith will perform on Maui to settle a class-action lawsuit resulting from a concert cancellation in 2007. [AP]
• "He was renowned for wearing grandpa-style spectacles but it now emerges that John Lennon's iconic look came about by accident…" [Daily Express]
• Blind item! "Which alcoholic songbird wears her sunglasses even inside her hair salon so no one can see how sauced she is?" [Gatecrasher]
• "I love her. It's great for her. It's what she wanted."  Josh Lucas on ex-girlfriend Salma Hayek getting married in Venice on Saturday. [People]
• "Tax got to 82% [in the 1970s] and I thought this was kind of unfair. Also, I see... that the government has taken it up to 50% and if it goes to 51 I will be back in America. I will not pay the Government more than I get. No way, ever. So they've reached their limit with me. That's the lot."  Michael Caine. [Telegraph]
• "I did read a scene for the Coen brothers last year, which they were amazed I would do. I was amazed they were amazed because apparently there's a whole etiquette I'm not aware of that says if you've been in a couple of films, you don't read. Which I find very strange, because how are the filmmakers supposed to know whether you can do it or not? I was very happy to read."  Tilda Swinton, when asked if she has ever auditioned for a role. [Backstage]
• "Life's a pain in the butt. You've got to be in shape for it. And the hell with the good old days. The most important thing is now. What are you this moment?"  Jack LaLanne, who still works out every day for two hours, lifting weights and swimming, at age 94. [Reuters]
• "I knew it was a joke. I knew it was supposed to be silly. Something like that I don't even take seriously. I thought it was hilarious."  Beyoncé, on the "screeching" clip made by prankster Matthew Zeghibe. [Gatecrasher]
• "I was raised in the country. When it was warm outside we were out there in shorts, no shirt, no shoes. I was doing that long before anybody was taking pictures and people like you were seeing it."  Matthew McConaughey. [Newsweek]
• "I know I've never done any independent film before…but there aren't that many other scripts out there with great parts for women my age. It's a true phenomenon that the parts dwindle as you get older. You wake up one day and you're flabbergasted to find out…so, this has happened to me. When I started out," she continues, "It was right around the time when Meryl Streep and Jessica Lange and Sally Field-all these actresses getting older-were still having big movies every year. There was a Sophie's Choice, a Norma Rae, etc. I thought, this is a new era, and I won't have to worry. It will all be fixed by the time I'm 40! And of course, it wasn't. All of us female actors think we can just keep going and going. But it's not always the case."  Geena Davis. [The Daily Beast]
• "We know so much about every actor on planet Earth. We know how they like to slice their avocado, what they named their baby. When I'm watching them save the world in a movie, I don't want to be thinking about their baby's name. I will now go on record to say I'm not going to even name my kid."  Ryan Reynolds. [NY Mag]

• So you know how Gerard Butler kicked a paparazzi's ass yesterday? He was definitely provoked. After Gerard allegedly got out of the limo and punched the dude in the face, the photog continued following Butler for more than an hour before going to the hospital. Plus, he called a lawyer before calling the cops. [TMZ]
• Oooh! Anna Wintour has a crush on Gerard Butler! Get in line, lady. Or put him on the cover of Vogue! [Page Six]
• Did you notice how Brad and Angelina stopped in New Orleans before heading back to France? Totally on purpose! An insider says: "Brad wanted to check on the progress of the houses being built in the Ninth Ward." And someone else says: "With just a handful of weeks before the presidential election, they wanted to subtly remind everyone that New Orleans is still in recovery mode." [E!]
• Um, Angelina is in a new glossy version of The Bible. [Drudge Retort]

• Britney's lawyer would not take a plea deal for her driving-without-a-license case. He wants a $10 fine. "We don't want a misdemeanor," he says. "This should be an infraction. No probation." So! There will be a trial on October 15. [E!]
• As for Jamie Lynn, as previously reported, even though the Enquirer says she is knocked up again, other sources say she is not pregnant. Phew. [Perez Hilton, TMZ]
• Oh yeah, and what's up with OK! saying that Jamie Lynn's baby daddy Casey never cheated on JLS, when In Touch had an exclusive interview with the other woman? Both mags stand by their stories. [MSNBC]
• Zac Efron was attacked by a a middle-aged man thought to be a deranged fan in London. The dude ran up to Zac and girlfriend Vanessa Hudgens and tried to grab Zac's hair. Apparently he wouldn't let go of the teen heartthrob and had to be tackled by a bodyguard. [Mirror
• Michael Phelps went to a party where ladies surrounded him and screamed, "Fish man! Fish man!" [Page Six]
• Wait, what's this? Michael Phelps has a girlfriend? Miss California runner-up Nicole Johnson? [Rush & Molloy]
• Nicole Richie and little Harlow are on the cover of People this week! [People]
• Diddy is pissed that John McCain called Barack Obama "that one." [Radar]
• On October 14, there will be a benefit concert thrown by DJ AM's friends  with performances from celebrity DJs, including Mark Ronson, Steve Aoki, Danny Masterson and Mixmaster Mike. Proceeds will go to the memorial funds established for crash victims. [People]
• Former America's Next Top Model competitors will now be on Modelville, a reality show within Tyra's talk show. Very meta. [E!]
• Joe Jonas and Taylor Swift have broken up. You know who they are, right? [Us Magazine]
• Hugh Hefner talks about his split with Holly Madison: "If Holly says it's over, I guess it's over. She's still here in the house. Until a few days ago, we were still sharing the same bed." He also says: "It's now apparent there will be some new faces in my personal life and on the show. There's been moments that I've been down in the dumps about all this… [But] there are girls lined up outside the front gate. At my age, that's hard to believe, but it seems to be true." He added: "It's a big house. And I'm not going to live alone. I'm definitely not going to live alone." [AP]
• Nikki Blonsky says that airport brawl with ANTM's Bianca left her "completely destroyed" and she lives "every day in pain." She and her father face assault charges. [People]
• Audrina was on Ellen's show and talked all about LC and Justin Bobby! Lauren and Justin flirted in the past; Audrina has tried to call LC but LC hangs up on her; and Audrina hasn't spoken to Justin Bobby. So basically nothing was confirmed. [Perez Hilton]
• Courteney Cox looks like a dazed zombie on the cover of the new Marie Claire. [ONTD]
• Michael Jackson took his kids to a comic book store in L.A. and they wore masks, prompting this paper to print the headline: "It's ALWAYS Halloween In Michael Jackson's Family." But the unmasked pix are cute! Blanket is getting so big. Here's a question: Do you really think MJ is the father of those kids? [The Sun]
• Oprah is leading an Obama fund-raising weekend in Chicago. [Chicago Sun-Times]
• Jason Priestley returning to 90210? Ah, to direct. Hmm. [People]
• Ricky Gervais has built a gym at his New York apartment — because he is too embarrassed to work out in public. [The Sun
• Katy Perry's mom dated Jimi Hendrix? And her dad was an LSD dealer, good friends with Timothy Leary? [The Sun]
• Hannah Montana is hazardous to your health: Some jewelry with the Disney star on it was found to have high levels of lead. [Perez Hilton]
• Lil' Kim is being sued for $2.5 million by a recording company, which says the rapper hasn't delivered all the recordings their contract requires. [USA Today]
• Rachael Ray wants to open a burger joint in New York. "I'm going for a '60s back-in-the-day Rat Pack-y kind of hangout, and I want the bar to be really central [and] the burgers to become a very social thing. I want people to come to the bar to see beautiful proper martinis being made and to enjoy some sliders." So. Hungry. [Gothamist]
• TV chef Jamie Oliver didn't want to kiss girls at his book signings for fear of communicable disease: I said, 'Look, you know, I'm very loyal to my wife and if I have to keep kissing these birds, right, it's only a numbers game before I get herpes. And once you've got it ... it never goes. And I'll be growing flapjack on me lip.'" [Daily Star]
• Paul McCartney is calling on his fans to boycott McDonald's after finding out his picture is in a Mickey Ds in Liverpool. He's been a vegetarian for decades. [Nikki Sixx, who is dating Kat Von D, says, in the beginning, when they first started seeing each other, "When I tried to kiss her she karate chopped me. She's a fiery one." [People]
• American Idolcontestant Kelli Pickler battled a year-long depression and anti-depressants made her "crazy." [People]
• LOL: Boogie Nights, the musical. [The Star]
• Do what you must to prepare yourself: Katie Price, the "glamour model" known as Jordan, and her husband Peter Andre are moving to Hollywood in January. They have three kids: Harvey, 6, who is blind; Junior Savva Andreas Andre, 3, and one year old Princess Tiáamii Crystal Esther Andre. [Perez Hilton]
• Ozzy Osbourne's show on Fox will be "half scripted," so the Writers Guild of America is issuing a warning to writers about that. [NY Times]
• Following Peter Cook's interview with Barbara Walters, Christie Brinkley says: "It is a measure of [his] character that he has breached the confidentiality agreement that is in the divorce settlement and has sought to present this distorted one-side view of his marriage." Word. [ABC News]
• Here's a picture from Howard Stern's wedding, if you care. [People]
• Who shot the sheriff? Eric Clapton is auctioning 13 of his shotguns. [The Sun]
• Anna Deveare Smith will premiere a new solo piece in November, inspired by Arizona State University's law school, named for retired Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Connor - the first U.S. law school to be named for a woman. [Yahoo News]
• "All men have thought about her at least once in their lives. The great thing about Judi Dench is that she's the matriarch of British film. She has an innate power about her ... Bond needs a woman like M to contain his nonsense and say, 'Look, 007, you've been an idiot!' But they won't sleep together. Not unless the cupboard gets very bare in terms of storylines."  Daniel Craig. [Sydney Morning Herald]
• "[The Beatles] were young capitalists who, far from developing a youth culture, were exploiting youth culture by promoting fan worship, mindless screaming and nothing more than a passive teenage consumer."  Historian David Fowler. [Guardian]
• "Last night i went to see Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist and it was so cute! I think the entire cast is so much fun to watch, and the storyline is great. I'm a big fan of Kat Dennings and Michael Cera. It would be nice to give them some support! Seeing movies like this is such a good feeling. It also shows you how important movies are in life – you can be in a horrible mood, and most of the time a movie that makes you laugh and enjoy life can change your mood by the time you walk out of the theatre."  Lindsay Lohan. [People]
• "Most heterosexual men do not find Renée Zellweger attractive. It’s true. Nice girl, and I have met Renée. She is the kind of girl who bakes really good muffins, you go out to dinner with her, but that’s it."  Denis Leary. [Vanity Fair]
• "What Jay and I have is real. It's not about interviews or getting the right photo op. It's real."  Beyoncé, sorta talking about her wedding in Essence. [ People]
• "But if you, out of nowhere, are going to grab a woman out of the woods and make her your vice presidential candidate, what can I do? [Sarah Palin] is like Jodie Foster in the movie Nell. They just found her, and she was speaking her own special language. Have you noticed how [Palin's] rallies have begun to take on the characteristics of the last days of the Weimar Republic? In Florida, she asked 'Who is Barack Obama?' Hey, lady, we just met YOU five fucking weeks ago."  Jon Stewart. [Rush & Molloy]

• Following the terrible plane crash in which drummer Travis Barker and Adam "DJ AM" Goldstein were seriously injured, there were reports that Chris Baker, Travis's friend and business partner, was on his way to be home with his pregnant wife. These reports were erroneous. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Both Lindsay and Sam blogged about the horrifying plane crash. Wrote LL: "It's so scary to think that life can end so fast...we must all treasure each and every moment—and be thankful for what we have." [E!]
• Travis Barker is burned "mostly from the waist down." DJ AM is "really really badly burned," and the worst is on his face. [E!]
• Mandy Moore has rushed to the bedside of ex-boyfriend DJ AM. Travis Barker's ex-wife Shanna Moakler hopped a flight to be with Travis. [E!]
• Random celebs react to the DJ AM and Travis Barker news. [E!]
• DJ AM and Travis Barker could be hospitalized for weeks but are expected to fully recover. [CNN]
• A tire blowout could be to blame for the plane crash. [People]

• At the Emmys last night, the dresses were pretty, but boring. Christina Applegate looked awesome. [Yahoo News]
• On the red carpet last night, Christina Applegate said: "I've got a pretty dress on and lipstick, and [it's] something I haven't done in two months." She also addressed her breast cancer and the double mastectomy she endured: "For me to have a voice and be the voice of a 30-something-year-old girl going through this and dispelling the misnomers that it's an older woman's disease is a big part of this for me." [People]
• This report says that since the Golden Globes were almost canceled and the Oscars were anticlimactic, the Emmys were festive and glamourous but not ridiculously over the top. [MSNBC]
• Tina Fey lost her purse during the Emmys. She also said of Sarah Palin: "I want to be done playing this lady Nov. 5. So if anybody can help me be done playing this lady Nov. 5, that would be good for me." [AP]
• Is Lindsay coming out, little by little, on her MySpace  instead of in one big "Yes, I'm gay" cover story on a tabloid mag? [LA Times]
• Someone is trying to sell 12 pictures from Casey Aldridge's digital camera that show Britney Spears, Jamie Lynn Spears, daughter Maddie and Casey… and in one picture, Jamie Lynn is breastfeeding Maddie and her breast is exposed. Because JLS is a minor, selling or buying the pix could be a violation of child pornography laws, even though they're not sexual. [TMZ]
• George Michael was arrested with crack in a public restroom. Um. Crack as in drugs. Not ass crack. As far as we know. He was taken to a police station and given a "caution." [BBC News]
• George Michael says: "I want to apologise to my fans for screwing up again, and to promise them I'll sort myself out. And to say sorry to everybody else, just for boring them." [Perez Hilton]
• Comic Sandra Bernhard says a "gang rape" joke she made about Sarah Palin was part of her act. "I certainly wish Governor Palin no harm. I'd just like her to explain to me how she can hold such outrageous views  and then go back to Alaska." [UPI]
• Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds were out on the Lower East Side of New York recently wearing matching bowler hats. They went to some bar and the doorman wanted to take a picture with Scarlett when she snapped, "I'm not the Statue of Liberty." [Page Six]
• Jack McBrayer, who plays Kenneth on 30 Rock, says Jennifer Aniston's stint for the show was "fantastic." "I think we are all star-struck with her." [People]
• Singer Natalie Cole, who recently revealed she had hepatitis C, has been hospitalized as a result of side effects from her medication and a heavy promotional schedule. [USA Today]
• Mel Gibson just bought David Duchovny and Tea Leoni's Malibu home for $11.5 million. Hmm, liquidation of assets… Are David and Tea going to get divorced? [TMZ]
• Ali Lohan hopped on the back of a male friend's motorcycle and had to be rushed to the hospital for minor injuries after a minor accident last month. She got "scraped up." A friend says, "I think she may have wanted to impress this boy." [ONTD]
• Miley Cyrus is sick of being Hannah Montana. [ONTD via TMZ]
• Kate Moss and Jamie Hince have split up and it is FINAL. [The Sun]
• A "mystery hunk" gave Kate Moss a lapdance. [Mirror]
• Does Pete Doherty want Kate Moss back? [Mirror]
• Hugh Grant and Jemima Khan: Back on. [Daily Express]
• Victoria "Posh Spice" Beckham says: "You know, I could just go shopping every day and sit on my bum. But I’d be so bored. I don’t even go shopping any more. I run four miles, seven days a week. I am eating more. I think you do eat more when you’re working out." She also says her new short hair wasn't her idea: "I just told the hairdresser to use his imagination." [The Sun]
• Sienna Miller is going to be in that Guy Ritchie Sherlock Holmes film, which means she'll be reunited with Jude Law on screen. Awkward! [Mirror]
• The woman who is suing two photographers and a paparazzi agency over a video that shows Heath Ledger doing drugs has amended her lawsuit. [News.com.au]
• Kanye West, John Legend, Sheryl Crow, Stevie Wonder and others can be heard on Yes We Can: Voices of a Grassroots Movement, a CD for sale exclusively through Barack Obama's campaign. [USA Today]
• John Lennon had a terrible temper and once screamed into son Sean's ear so loudly his ear was damaged and he had to go to the hospital. [Page Six]
• Heather Mills is donating one million dollars worth of vegan food to children in the South Bronx, one of the poorest neighborhoods in New York. What kids in the ghetto dream of: Soy burgers. [The Star]
• Heather says: "The public adores me... I haven't got a bad word to say about Paul... men are falling over themselves to ask me out... my only interest in life is helping others." [Daily Mail]
• Holland Taylor, who plays Charlie Sheen's mom on Two And A Half Men, commented on the news that Charlie and his wife Brooke are expecting a baby: "I think he's a wonderful daddy to his girls – he just adores them, he's very sweet with them. [But] it will be very interesting to see Charlie with a boy. It'll bring out a whole other side of him, I'm sure." [People]
• Arnold Schwarzenegger confirms that he used to smoke weed with Tommy Chong. [TMZ]
• Robert Wagner had an affair with Barbara Stanwyck, his co-star in the 1953 film Titanic, who was 23 years his senior. [Reuters]
• Jamie Oliver and his wife Jools are expecting a new baby to join daughters Poppy Honey, 6 and Daisy Boo, 5. May we suggest some possible names? Violet Love, Rose Sugar, Carnation Milk. [Mirror]
• Steven Tyler performed in pants he'd gotten from Cher. [Fox 411]
• Jenna Jameson and Tito Ortiz: Having twins. [Perez Hilton]
• You know how Audrina moved out of Lauren Conrad's house? It was supposed to be an "exclusive" story for a major tabloid mag. But now everyone knows. But! Since she already signed a deal, Audrina gets to keep the money. We'll see what Us Weekly has on the cover on Wednesday. [TMZ]
• Holly Madison and Criss Angel: Still hanging out in Las Vegas, though they deny that they're dating. They were seen dancing and kissing in a club. [Perez Hilton]
• Rachel Bilson will star in an indie romance in which she plays a TV actress living in Hollywood. Way to show your range! [Variety]
• David Blaine will hang upside down above Central Park for 60 hours and could go blind due to the blood pressure in his eyes. Additionally, he could bore us to tears. [Mirror]
• Be prepared to take Mariah Carey seriously as an actress: She plays the battered wife of a state trooper in Tennessee, and just got cast in Push, where she'll play a Harlem social worker. She's also developing a movie musical based, um, on her Christmas album. [Rush & Molloy]
• "I gained five pounds and it’s like a national scandal."  Eva Longoria. [The Sun]
• "I will no longer attempt to do any sports movie, anymore. Any sports. No golf movie. I'm retired from sports-genre films. You know, I think I filled my quota."  Will Ferrell. [USA Today]
• When you were younger, did you ever dream about being royalty? "No. I was a tomboy. When I was a child, I made mud pies—sort of just adding water to mud and squishing it together. I didn't wear a skirt until I think I was 14. The princess thing was the last thing on my list."  Keira Knightley. [Newsweek]
• "My breasts have had a brilliant career. I've just tagged along for the ride."  Pamela Anderson. [Daily Mail]
• "I'm 37. I have nothing to say about the new 90210. Who gives a shit."  Sarah Silverman. [E!]

• Naomi Campbell pleaded guilty to kicking and spitting at police officers after screaming foul words at a British Airways employee. Naomi was heard on the phone saying: "They have lost my fucking bags, get me another flight, get the press, get me my lawyer." What? Like you don't say that all the time. Please. [The Sun]
• Didja hear? Jamie Lynn Spears squeezed out a daughter named Maddie Briann yesterday. Good luck, kid! Er, kids. [E!]
• Not that you needed to know this but: JLS didn't have a C-section. [ET]
• Casey Aldridge was so nervous the first time he held his new daughter  birthed by girlfriend Jamie Lynn Spears  that he said he was afraid he's drop her. Aw. [TMZ]
• "[Jamie Lynn] is awfully young to be a momma, but that's what they make [grandmothers] for. They have to help. That's the way it is with our circle of friends." JLS's distant cousin Margie Busby. [People]
• Britney might move back to Louisiana. [Us]
• Snoop Dogg's new country video is out! "Country music is the most underrated music in the world," Snoop, who dedicates the song to Johnny Cash, says. "It always has the test of time, it's great, it's heartfelt, and it touches people no matter what color they are or where they're from." [People]

• Amy Winehouse is still in the hospital. [People]
• Tom Cruise is introducing David Beckham and Will Smith to fencing. Or, as this paper notes, they play with their swords together. [Mirror]
• Would you look at Will Smith's son, Jaden, 9, surrounded by blondes? [E!]
• Rhys Ifans is "heartbroken" after his split with Sienna Miller, which is why he got loaded and threw a beer bottle at photographers. Or maybe they were harassing him. [The Sun]
• Holy crap! After 14 years, is there a song from the Guns N Roses album, Chinese Democracy? [E!]
• OMG OMG Match Game is coming back? Seriously, I watch the old episodes on GSN and it is the best thing ever conceived. Drunk celebrities making sexual innuendos and double entendres. Bret Sommers, Richard Dawson, Charles Nelson Reilly. And that skinny mic Gene Rayburn rocks! It's corny, it's genius. Watch this. Or this. Oh! Anyway: Sarah Silverman, Norm MacDonald and Rashida Jones will be on the new version. [ONTD]
• Katie Holmes's Broadway play is bumping Mario Lopez's Broadway musical from its theater. Are we living in a parallel dimension where such a sentence makes sense? [ONTD]
• Janice Dickinson: Seen wearing an eyepatch and throwing water on a paparazzi. These TMZ dudes are jerks, huh? They just stalk and harass celebs till something happens and then post the video as "news." [TMZ]
• If you know who Charlotte Church is, you may care that she is pregnant with her second child. [The Sun]
• Oh no! The H, A, and N on this Hancock billboard in London were added last. Meaning, for a period of time, the sign read COCK. [The Sun]
• In Pete Doherty's new YouTube video, he films himself while taking a bath. What? At least he's clean. [The Sun]
• Molly Sims' dog ate so much sand it had to go to the hospital. [Page Six]
• Socialite Tinsley Mortimer is apparently too boring to get her own MTV show. [Page Six]
• Oprah Winfrey's bff Gayle King likes James Frey's new book, ha ha. [Page Six]
• Twin models walked off the set of Catherine Zeta-Jones's new movie The Rebound because they didn't want to wear skimpy bathing suits, yawn. [Page Six]
• Is there trouble in paradise for Ivana Trump and her new hubby? He didn't go with her to England's Royal Ascot races or to a slew of parties in Saint-Tropez. What the hell is wrong with him? Hanging with Ivana sounds fun. [Rush & Molloy]
• Jeremy Piven hit on Megan Fox at a party and promptly struck out. [Page Six]
• Jay-Z's new glasses are reminiscent of Raj from What's Happening!!. [The.Life Files]

Star
Jamie Lynn's "baby joy turns to tears…" because her shotgun wedding to Casey Aldridge is allegedly off! Despite frequent, happy looking trips to Wal-Mart, the two teens fight all the time. Even worse, Casey is reportedly two-timing Jamie Lynn! "Casey is acting like a dog," a local yokel notes. And Casey's not the only "celebrity" behaving badly. The Hills Whitney Port is acting like a diva, showing up late to appearances and demanding trips to 7-Eleven. Even more shocking: a Whitney Port personal appearance commands $14,000. New moms Melissa Joan Hart and Jaime Pressly are gabbing about their new baby boys. Jaime ate cabbage soup six days a week and worked out two hours a day to lose her baby weight. Sounds…farty and ill-advised. Lilo hates Mary-Kate Olsen because of her friendship with Samantha Ronson, although MK is really scared of people thinking she's a lezebel. John Mayer has a touch of the OCD: since moving in with Jennifer Aniston at her hotel in Florida while she shoots Marley and Me, he has been cleaning up after her cleaning lady. Jen, who is 9 years older than John, is also featured in a spread called "Cougar Season" alongside Mariah, Ellen DeGeneres, and ur-Cougar Demi Moore. Ladies sometimes date younger men: this is not news. We are officially over the term "cougar."
Grade: D (falling asleep outside and having someone write "Dick" on your stomach in sunblock)
Us
Former jilted Bachelor star Andrew Firestone has a "Second Chance At Love," the Us cover blares. Even though ex-fiancée Jen Schefft dumped him on his keister after the show aired, Firestone has found love with a leggy blonde Serbian model named Ivana Bozilovic. You guys, it's so hard to rebound from a break-up when you're a ridiculously good-looking heir to a tire fortune. Firestone has been through so much! Not as much as breakup postergirl Jennifer Aniston. But things seem to be looking up for our formerly depressed diva! Her friends all love new boyfriend John Mayer, even notoriously tough Courteney Cox. Several preggers stars are just about ready to "pop": Gwen Stefani, Nicole Kidman, Jamie Lynn Spears, Luciana Damon (Matt's wife) and Ryan Shawhughes (Ethan Hawke's gf) are among the super pregs. Patrick Swayze has gone back to work on the forthcoming A&E series The Beast even though he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. No cancer puts Patrick in a corner! Kim Cattrall signed on to executive produce and star in a new HBO comedy, Sensitive Skin, which is about a woman rediscovering her sexuality. "Even though it's my name, and the word skin is there, it's a very subtle show," she assures Us. Mmmkay.
Grade: D- (subway smells on a 99 degree day)
In Touch
Angelina is "Pushing Brad Away!" Nooooes! Apparently Ange has violent mood swings because of all the pregnancy hormones and Brad can't deal with it. He took Maddox to the MotoGP motorcycling championship just to get the eff away from Angie. At least she's not back to her Billy Bob humping days, but allegedly Nicole Richie is back to her old bad habits, namely not eating. She's down to 95 pounds, only ten pounds heavier than her scary looking lowest point. Also back to bad habits: Brit Brit. She's back on the sauce, but still not doing drugs, though some fear that Britney's cocktail swilling might lead back down the road to cocaine corner. Also: there's some sidebar saying that Britney's boozing is causing her to have acne. WTF? Did a boob job come between George Clooney and Sarah Larson? Apparently Larson got her tatas done in May, and George wasn't happy about it. Sarah, however, is so thrilled with her new bod that she is considering posing for Playboy. Sigh.
Grade: F+ (second degree sunburn)
OK!
Aw, Shiloh is excited about Angelina's new babies! Apparently SO excited that OK! felt the need to devote four pages to the minutia of Shiloh's very existence. She has "pull-up diapers and tells Mom and Dad when she has to go to the bathroom"! She is learning to sleep alone! She puts her hands on Angie's stomach to feel the twins kick! Um, just like ANY OTHER TWO-YEAR-OLD EVER IN THE HISTORY OF LIFE. Brad Pitt might be making babies these days, but according to a "friend" of John Mayer's, Brad doesn't stack up to John in the sack. John is "Not just good, but sensational" at the sex." Jen is so appreciative that she's started glowing and wearing dresses. Or something like that. Mutiny in The Hills! Lauren Conrad and Audrina Patridge are brawling. There's a photo shoot with Audrina at her pool house, behind the main house where Lauren and Lo live, and apparently L.C. was pissed about it. "She was very, very mad." Audrina says. "She said it's her house. But this is my room…No she thinks I'm sneaky and shady for doing this photo shoot, yet she and her team knew about it." Dramz!
Grade: F (boob sweat on a date)
Life & Style
Katie is Tom's Prisoner. Again. Katie went to New York for four days to rehearse for her new play, All My Sons, and she never went anywhere but the hotel and the theater. She looked annoyed at a party, according to an "insider" and it's because she feels suffocated. Is John Mayer ready to be a dad? Life & Style ponders. Jen started talking about a friend's fertility treatment over dinner and John "swiftly" changed the subject. "This spinach is awesome…It's very garlicky," Mayer reportedly said. Heh. Maybe that's why Jennifer Aniston has been feuding with He's Just Not That Into You co-star, Jennifer Connelly. The cast of the film, which includes Drew Barrymore and Ginnifer Goodwin, got together for a Marie Claire photoshoot, and Aniston threatened to pull out if Connelly was included. Janet Jackson looks to be "up 20 pounds" since October, and she needs to lose weight before her Rock Wichu tour in September. She plans to eat healthier and exercise more and blah blah blah.

Grade: F- (heatstroke)

• Kate Moss emerged from a bar, giggling and a little tipsy, and announced: "I'm getting married!" Jamie "Hotel" Hince of The Kills is the lucky guy. [The Sun]
  
• Is Britney's paparazzi moment finally over? "Over the weekend, there were less than a half dozen covering Britney," says an agency head. Yet there were 30 in the pack covering Miley Cyrus. Most of them were Britney regulars, but they want something new and fresh. It's moved on to Miley." Oh, dear. [Rush & Molloy]
  
• The New York Times on Britney's appearance on How I Met Your Mother: "Ms. Spears showed that for a few minutes she can play someone else. But she was not entrusted with an opportunity to show she is herself again." [NY Times]
  
• Tyra Banks isn't getting along with ANTM photo shoot creative director Jay Manuel, only wants to show up on judging days and could leave the show altogether  she wants to put all of her energy behind her talk show. [MSNBC]
  
• Amy Winehouse: Going back to rehab? A source says there are too many temptations in London and her management considered flying her to a clinic in Israel, or maybe one in Cape Town, South Africa. [The Sun]

• A new poll has named Ellen DeGeneres the top TV host  over Oprah. Ms. Winfrey, you better start dancing! [Yahoo News]
• Michelle Williams' father is urging Heath Ledger's father to be honest about Heath's finances. "Come clean," Larry Williams says. "Say where the income went and where the assets are." [Mirror]
• Usher's new wife: Seen "guarding" her man "like a watchdog" from the other sexy women on the set of his new video. [Page Six]
• Fergie is not pregnant, says her modeling agent. Gee, thanks, and we know it's not at all in your best business interest to say otherwise. [Page Six]
• If Axl Rose releases his long-awaited album, Chinese Democracy this year, Dr. Pepper will give everyone in America a free can of Dr. Pepper. Or you could just buy a can and listen to "Patience." (I been walking the streets at night, just tryin' to get it right...) [Page Six]
• In New York City, Lower East Side bar crawlers are dodging the Olsen twins' black Escalades. [Page Six]
• After seeing her on Dancing With The Stars, a top cosmetic surgeon is claiming Priscilla Presley's botched face job could have been avoided: "There is no movement at all in her face, no expression. No expert in Botox would leave you like that. Her mouth is uneven. It's almost like a Bell's palsy on one side, as if there's been nerve damage." Another writer says Presley looks like "a bulldog bitten by wasps." Ouch. [Rush & Molloy]
• Apparently the "doctor" who injected Priscilla used industrial-grade silicone used to lubricate auto parts. Larry King's wife and Lionel Richie's wife also saw this phony doc. [TMZ]
• Famous Cajun chef Paul Prudhomme has been shot! Except the bullet did no damage  it just grazed his skin. The chef was cooking at a Louisiana golf course at the time of the incident, and there's no information as to where the .22 bullet came from. [TMZ]
• Singer Nate Dogg has pleaded guilty to aggravated trespassing and battery and can not own a gun for 10 years. Bad for his image, good for the world at large. [TMZ]
• Ryan Phillippe says seeing ex-wife Reese Witherspoon with new man Jake Gyllenhaal is "bizarre" but he tries to avoid looking at pictures of the two together. [People]
• Renee Zellweger moves so often she feels like a gypsy. "I'm never bored. The whole world is home. It's my playground. I can go and play anywhere and I love it. I like to move along. I had a really nice house in Bel Air and I was paying this huge mortgage for my cat." [Mirror]
• JK Rowling may be forced to defend her ownership of Harry Potter  she wants to block the publication of a Harry Potter encyclopedia; her publisher says her intellectual property rights do not exend that far. Banisho competiva titlo! [Mirror]
• Helen Mirren has won an award for "promoting healthy nudity" from the USA Naturist Society. She appeared naked in Calendar Girls and sunbathes naked at home. [Mirror]
• Brooke Burke's son was born March 5, but she still hasn't decided on a name. Her other kids are named Rain, Neriah, and Sierra. Any suggestions? [People]