brody jenner - Jezebel

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The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
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coconanas
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
They want her to go to rehab because she dances like a knob when she's shitfaced at a party?

If that is what equals alcoholism, 89% of Australians would need to go to rehab. #thehillsjoefrancis
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GoldenRatioφ (aka -girl11)
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
The title of this says it all...everyone cool in LA and Malibu just goes to a party and looks bored and pissed off for a couple hours, then leaves. So, dancing like this, unless, of course, you are smoking hot Playboy material, and the guys think it's hot, is cause for embarrassment, and embarrassment is cause for rehab. Stop having fun Holly! #thehillsjoefrancis
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liloslifecoach
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
Is it just me or does Holly seem like the only fun one on The Hills? When she was dancing, all I could think was, why won't those sticks in the mud get up and dance?? Stay strong and drunk, Holly!!! #thehillsjoefrancis
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nohaircuts
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
It's like these people have never seen Intervention before.

If they want to get the narrative right, Holly needs to be sneaking beers all day at work, and chugging mouthwash before passing out on the lawn, and then they need to get her beleaguered, co-dependent children to threaten to quit driving her to the liquor store before school. An insincere hug from she-Pratt isn't going to cut it.

This show can even make the judgmental melodrama boring. #thehillsjoefrancis
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delirium.megans
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
if doing 80's dances at a party makes you an alcoholic, then sign me up for rehab. #thehillsjoefrancis
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pantsless economist...access RESTORED
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
The She-Pratt just got a DUI, right? awkward. #thehillsjoefrancis
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JinxyMcDeath
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
I was confused why they told Holly that she needed to go to rehab. I mean, that seemed a bit excessive. Tons of my friends drink "too much" but I wouldn't say enough to where they need to go to rehab for it. Also, I didn't find Holly's behavior to be super drunky.

If anyone has shown to be super drunky, it's that drama queen, Jayde. Ugh, I hate that girl. She starts a fight with the first sentence she says by saying something snarky and immature "Oh, I didn't say hi since I saw you talking to Kristin." And then feigns surprise when Brody reacts negatively and cries foul, "why are you mad!?" Then to top it off, she has the balls to talk shit about him to her friends while he's at the same party. Um, how old is this girl? 16. I would have dumped her for that alone.

See, I said last week that Brody and Jayde were the type of couple that constantly fought, that no one liked together (specifically, no one liked Jayde), but that they stay together for YEARS for unknown reasons. I remain correct. #thehillsjoefrancis
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phoenixgirl70
10/28/09

@JinxyMcDeath: Why do you believe you know the real Jayde and Brody from watching this fake scripted show? That's their storyline. Seriously, hating on a girl you see for 2 minutes on a fake show? To spend time writing not just comments but paragraphs about her? Relax....you don't know her, she is not someone in your life. Save your energy for something real. #thehillsjoefrancis
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JinxyMcDeath
10/29/09

@phoenixgirl70: Oh ok, thanks girl who doesn't know me. I've been laying awake at night thinking about Jayde and Brody and their relationship now for weeks. So, I appreciate your intevention. #thehillsjoefrancis
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TildeMarks
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
I, too, am moved by the Muzak. My milkshake brings all the boys to the aisle, if I dare say so. #thehillsjoefrancis
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TildeMarks
10/28/09

@TildeMarks: Shoulda gone below - note to self. (Dangit.) #thehillsjoefrancis
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morninggloria
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
Things I would rather do than hang out with any of these people:
- have really dry drunk sex for a month-- the kind that you know is fruitless but you just keep drunkenly doing, until one or both of you is like, I am just too impaired for this, and then you go to sleep, and the next day you have that residual "dry sex vagina" feeling.
- study for a SEC sponsored test about taxation of invesmtents
- drink warmed up tequila and chocolate milk
- hug Michael Vick

I wonder if anyone watches this group of dead-eyed vanilla with the price jacked up and thinks, you know, I really think that these people are fucking rad. Do they? Oh, god. #thehillsjoefrancis
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Ruby_de_la_Booby
10/28/09

@morninggloria: At first, I read your top bullet as "dry drunk" sex, as in sex with a dry drunk. Like sex with George W Bush (which you could probably add to your list of things you would rather do than hang out with these people). #thehillsjoefrancis
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morninggloria
10/28/09

@Ruby_de_la_Booby: I don't know that I'd rather have sex with George W. Bush than be friends with a cast member from The Hills or The Fame Whores or The Oblivious Californians or whatever the show's going to be called in the future. I'd probably let George W. Bush get to second base, though. #thehillsjoefrancis
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missheidilynn
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
I dance that way sober...like all the time. I guess The Hills kids would think I am also an out of control drunk.

I can't help but dance in the market when I am at Fresh and Easy...they just play such amazing music my body has to move!!! #thehillsjoefrancis
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Mary McCarthyite
10/28/09

@missheidilynn: I do this too! I just...gotta...dance! #thehillsjoefrancis
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Uncommon Whore
10/28/09

@missheidilynn: Me too. I love that this is like so totally out of control, like woah for them. They seriously must be the most boring people alive. #thehillsjoefrancis
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Ailatan
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
that guy looks like David Schwimmer #thehillsjoefrancis
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CurtCole
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
Until Holly wakes up with her head in a birdcage and a yellow canary plucking out her eyebrows, she doesn't have a drinking problem. #thehillsjoefrancis
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lolabee
10/28/09

@CurtCole: friend of a friend? #thehillsjoefrancis
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CurtCole promoted this comment lolabee was starred lolabee was unstarred

CurtCole
10/28/09

@lolabee: Precisely. #thehillsjoefrancis
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lolabee
10/28/09

In reply to The Hills: Only Alcoholics Dance At Parties In Malibu
i'm convinced that the fact holly that has a "drinking problem" actually means she is perfectly fine; excessive drinking would be the only normal, healthy reaction to being on the hills.
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IBleedGlitter: The High Priestess of Tinsel promoted this comment Edited by lolabee at 10/28/09 1:06 PM lolabee was starred lolabee was unstarred

burningdinner
10/28/09

In reply to Lindsay Headed To India; Are Jude And Sienna Back On?
I've been trying to will Martin Amis to STFU since I read "Money." #lindsaylohan
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J.D.Regent
10/27/09

In reply to Lindsay Headed To India; Are Jude And Sienna Back On?
Can someone make a reality show where they pay Lindsay Lohan to get her GED and like volunteer at an animal shelter once a week? I would watch and support it. #lindsaylohan
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