• Gerard Butler is not, repeat, not dating Jennifer Aniston.

"I love her to death," he says. "She's the coolest and she's become a great friend, but there's nothing going on. And if there was, I'd be happy to say it!" Next week's tabloids covers: JEN'S HEARTBREAK! REJECTED BY GERARD! [E!]

• Starbucks barista to Nicole Kidman: "You know who you look like — that lady who used to be married to Tom Cruise. What's her name?" [Page Six]
• Randy and Evi Quaid were arrested yesterday, but they posted bail last night after the Presidio County Sheriff was kind enough to drive them to an ATM. Apparently law enforcement sources believe Randy and Evi have a pattern of staying in pricey hotels and not paying when they leave. [TMZ]
• Jude Law is the biological father of a newborn child, but he has told his one night stand Samantha Burke that he will not see their daughter for three months. He needs to finish Hamlet on Broadway first. [Telegraph, Telegraph]
• Bruce Willis doesn't like Facebook: "It's frightening, I think it's like the fall of Rome. Three years from now, after all the bees are dead..." [Mirror]
• In her book, Mackenzie Phillips claims she had sex with Mick Jagger when she was 18 (he would have been around 35). "I've been waiting for this since you were 10 years old," Jagger allegedly told her. She says: "I'd known Mick since I was a kid, and maybe most people think their parents' friends are old and gross. But this was Mick Jagger. Mick Jagger! He was hot. He had the most perfect ass in history." [NY Post]
• Britney Spears' 50/50 custody split with Kevin Federline will continue, at least through the end of the year. [TMZ]
• Chris Brown has booked his first show since assaulting Rihanna in February: He'll play Power 105.1's Powerhouse '09 concert with Keri Hilson, TheDream and Trey Songz. A source says: "Chris isn't advertiser-safe yet - his image has a long way to go… But for this show, he'll draw a crowd, so the producers of the show are willing to pay." [MSNBC Scoop]
• Jessica Alba's one-year-old daughter Honor is becoming bilingual. "I am a mother who shoves information down her throat, poor thing," Jessica says. "I sing her songs about colors in Spanish and English when I'm cooking. Literally I integrate learning into everything I do. We're into colors because I feel that's something a 15-month-old can sort of identify. So now she kind of points to blue and says 'azul' and I say 'Yes, azul, muy bien!' It's slow going but she's sort of picking it up." [People]
• How is Travis Barker doing after surviving a plane crash and the death of his good buddy DJ AM? Friend Rob Dyrdek says he's doing "better than I would probably think anyone would really expect." [People]
• "Mariah Carey is in a happy place with projects, love life." [USA Today]
• Brody Jenner's girlfriend, Jayde Nicole, is suing Joe Francis, alleging assault and battery. Joe Francis' response: "Jayde Nicole is an absolute and total liar. The only thing that Jayde Nicole is famous for is having a tattoo of the word 'respect' above her vagina." What does that have to do with anything? [TMZ]
• Khloe Kardashian's fiance, Lamar Odom, called off his bachelor party, which was to be hosted by Joe Francis and Khloe's brother Rob. Lamar opted for a private dinner with his teammates (and Joe and Rob) instead, which sounds like a smart move. [TMZ]
• Lamar Odom's bachelor party was supposed to have "stripper poles, midgets, and tons of candy." Because Joe Francis is classy like that. [Page Six]
• Sources says Ok! magazine will pay $300,000 for an exclusive on Khloe Kardashian's wedding. The money will go to Khloe and her mom. [Gatecrasher]
• Holly Madison, Hugh Hefner's former "number one" girlfriend, is getting her own reality show, Planet Holly. Holly says: "It's the perfect excuse for me to be normal in a lighthearted comedy romp. Think Mary Tyler Moore.' Um… MTM did not pose nude or have implants, though, right? [NY Daily News]
• Gossip Girl's Kelly Rutherford has filed court documents alleging that her stressful relationship with her ex husband has affected her ability to produce breast milk for her three-month old daughter. [Extra]
• Kelly Rutherford has been granted a temporary restraining order against her ex-husband, claiming he follows, threatens and scares her, her nanny, and her mother. [NY Daily News]
• Even though Kelis and Nas have been pictured together, their divorce is still on; there will be a hearing November 20. [TMZ]
• Jermaine Jackson's Michael Jackson tribute: "badly organized." [BBC News]
• Anne Heche says that she doesn't plan on marrying the father of her six-month-old child: "I want to stay in love." [E!]
• "Dancing with the Stars goes recession chic by reusing Shawn Johnson's costume for Natalie Coughlin." [NY Daily News]
• Click to see a picture of Emma Thompson is a Morris dancer outfit. [Daily Mail]
• Ricky Gervais explains how he got Philip Seymour Hoffman to do a cameo in his new film The Invention Of Lying: "I didn't know Philip Seymour Hoffman, but I sent him an email saying, 'Dear Philip, please do my new film. There's no money as I spent the entire budget on testicular implants. But don't think of them as my testicles, think of them as our testicles.' He loved it, and it worked." [Telegraph]
• From a great piece on Catherine Deneuve: "When we are talking of her role as a fashion model, and we reach the face, she confirms that she has never had any work done on it, while many of her age have. 'I haven't had the time,' she jokes. Then she adds: 'If you want an explanation, you would have to meet my mother. She is 98. It's genetic.'" [Times Of London]
• Edward Norton will play The Hulk in the Avengers movie. Norton says: "The thing about [Marvel's] universe that's fun is that it all cross-pollinates. Even when I was working on the script [for 'The Incredible Hulk'], I tried to plug in the whole Super-Soldier Serum from Captain America." [MTV News]
• "Olivia Newton-John claims to have seen UFO." [Telegraph]
• Justin Guarini, whose nose job nose is kind of insane, is getting married this weekend in a "spiritual," "intimate" service, which means Kelly Clarkson probably won't be there. [Prz]
• Brigitte Bardot is about to turn 75, and this column "reveals a life lived between bed and bedlam." [Daily Mail]
• Redmond O'Neal has been moved from jail to a an in-patient drug rehab facility. [People]
• Charles Manson follower Susan Atkins, who admitted killing actress Sharon Tate 40 years ago, has died. [NY Post]
• "As ailing showbiz mogul Dick Clark prepares to celebrate his 80th birthday in November, a new documentary threatens to tarnish his image by recounting his controversial beginnings." One word: Payola. [Reuters]
• "Richard Pryor's two children say they were never told their late father set up a trust for them…" [TMZ]
• "I haven't watched Vampire Diaries. And I haven't seen Twilight either." — True Blood's Stephen Moyer. [E!]
• "I think that by understanding Chanel's character and different sources of inspiration, you understand the rest of her life." — Audrey Tautou. [WSJ]
• "It's the first time that I really want to have kids. I've been very fortunate in my career, and my life has been about that for so long that you get bored of it. You're ready for your life to be about other people and other things." — Vince Vaughn, recently engaged... Will this turn into another "poor Jennifer Aniston" story? [People]
• "I wanna eat my potatoes and French fries and sponge cakes. When I play a role like this, I can't have my carbs and it makes me crazy." — Gerard Butler. [E!]
• "It's odd for my kids when they turn up at the theater and see me being a parent in a film. I know they're thinking, 'Who are these kids that are around my dad?' But they seem OK with it. Actually, my girls completely boss me. I have no power in my house whatsoever. I am the geek of my household. I am so low-status in my house, you wouldn't believe it. I'm definitely not treated like a movie star." — Clive Owen, who plays a widower dad in his new film The Boys Are Back. [Parade]
• "I love playing Peggy [Olson]. Finding the balance between playing her, finding new things, and not losing her, and constantly finding enough new stuff to keep her remaining herself…Playing her is an exercise in remaining simple, despite the fact that she is becoming more complicated. [She's] not out to hut anyone, she's just trying to figure out who she is. But it still is agenda-free. She is looking for her place in the world." — Elisabeth Moss, who is on the September cover of Vanice magazine. [JustJared]
• "Hitler was a genius orator. To make that many people turn and change and hate, he had to be a showman and he was." — Michael Jackson, on Rabbi Shmuley Boteach's tapes, which are now a book. [Daily Mail]
• Michael Jackson was asked by Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, "Is there a lot of jealousy in your profession?" "Absolutely," Jackson says, "and 'M' is one of them. Madonna." [Page Six]
• "We're more in love than ever. It's great." — Patricia Arquette, who filed for divorce from husband Thomas Jane earlier this year but is now back with him. [People]
• "Atheism has been on the rise for years now, and the Bible of the atheists is [Darwin's] The Origin of Species. We have a situation in our country where young people are entering college with a belief in God and exiting with that faith being stripped and shredded. What we want to do is have student make an informed, educated decision before they chuck their faith.… I am proud to bring this to people's attention. You see things in the world that are truly distressing and you think, 'What can I do?' Well this is something I can do." — Kirk Cameron. [People]

A strange piece on Bardot at 75 purports to celebrate the actress as an "existentialist icon" and a feminist figure. Emblematic of a free new sexuality, an overtly sensual demeanor and an attitude of not giving a toss, Bardot, says Agnès Poirier, was a model for the new woman.

And yet, Bardot was, like Marilyn before her, first a sex symbol. She was someone who was defined by the gaze and perceptions and fantasies of others. Yes, she was gorgeous and naturally sexy. But the things people praise in this piece and in the accompanying video- her "typical Frenchness" and "joie de vivre" and "modern beauty" - are surface impressions, as facile as those of the men who adopted her as a sex symbol at the time. Says one scholar in the film, Bardot was "a vivid, standing, invitation to experience and inhabit and acknowledge ones one lust, the sexual side of one's nature, because she is an amalga, the sort of perfect shape of an attractive, erotic, desirable female."

They all talk about Bardot like she's dead. When in fact she's inconveniently alive. Since her retirement at 39, while it's certainly true that she doesn't seem to give a damn what people think, she hasn't always hewn to the roles of either "sex symbol" or "feminist icon," much as the author would have us believe she does.

She would only leave her home to protest about animal rights and make some ill-advised comments about immigration. She was once linked to Jean-Marie Le Pen's National Front but has never been a member or even a sympathiser. In fact, to this day, she has never stopped being herself: plain-speaking and natural. She has never resorted to any cosmetic surgery, whereas so many of her contemporaries including Sophia Loren, who also turns 75 this week, put their hopes of immortal beauty in the surgeon's knife. Bardot has retained her authenticity. Her story is that of a refusal not only of hypocrisy and moral grudges, but also of caution, calculation and premeditation.

What? Bardot has been repeatedly charged with "inciting racial hatred" for making public statements against "foreign over-population" and, spurred by the ritual slaughter of sheep during Eid-al-Kabir,a letter to government officials in 2004 in which she described Muslims as "this population that leads us around by the nose, [and] which destroys our country." In a book, she wrote that "...my country, France, my homeland, my land is again invaded by an overpopulation of foreigners, especially Muslims." And she may not have been a member of Le Pen's party? But she was married to one of his most active supporters. Don't try to toss that in with no plastic surgery as some kind of free-spirited foible.

I find it ironic that those so eager to claim her as an icon of liberated womanhood are so insistent on looking only at that image that was created to appeal to men, and on ignoring the actual woman she is. She was an "icon," it's true - but not for who she was, or even who she wanted to be. Bardot has been vocally critical of her own film work and of a youth devoted to men. But we won't talk about that: it's so much easier when we can just objectify women and make them what we want.

Happy birthday, Brigitte Bardot [Guardian]

Brigitte Bardot at 75: 'She Represents The Power Of Woman' [Guardian]
Is Brigitte Bardot Bashing Islam? [Time]

• Amy Winehouse was hospitalized for dehydration after she "fainted after being out in the sun and without drinking water. She has been taking part in a lot of activities which also played a part."[TheSun]

• In a bit of good news for the singer, however, Amy has won a high-court harassment injunction that forces paparazzi to stay at least 100 meters from her home. [Guardian]
• "I do really intellectually highbrow stuff in my downtime. I read first-edition Shakespeare. I write poetry. I'm trying to get my masters in neuroscience. That's the kind of guy I am...man, I don't even know what a masters is."-Robert Pattinson[Guardian]
• Meanwhile, Jay Leno admits that his hospitalization was for exhaustion. "That's like a rich person's condition. Poor people that work – they don't get exhausted," Leno says, "Only rich people get exhausted. It's an embarrassing thing." [People]
• "Probably the sexiest woman I know is my mother. She's an ethereal angel. Nobody looks like that woman. If I could meet my mother and marry her, I would. I would be with my mother now, if she weren't my mother, as sick as that sounds." -Shia LaBeouf[ Star]
• Is Lauren Conrad coming back to The Hills? "She kind of realized, especially in this economy, there's not much else out there for her," says a source, "What else can she do that would earn as much?" Also returning to the Hills, my Laguna Beach favorite, Kristin Cavallari.[PageSix]
• Bristol Palin is reportedly still trying to "control" her ex, Levi Johnston. "What Bristol is doing amounts to emotional blackmail," says a source, "She no longer wants Levi in her life and is threatening to have him cut out of their newborn son Tripp's life." [NationalEnquirer]
• "I get to travel and go to London and Paris, while this person sits by the computer writing mean things about me. I'd rather be the one traveling."-Miley Cyrus on Perez Hilton. [ShowbizSpy]
• Sadness! 120 Minutes host Matt Pinfield has checked himself into rehab. "I've been struggling with a dependency that I need to address," Pinfield says, "I want to have a life, I don't want to be a statistic . . . It's the fight of my life, but you know what, I'm gonna win." [PageSix]
• Cindy Crawford's husband, Rande Gerber is being sued by two former employees, who claim that Gerber sexually harassed them while they worked as waitresses at the Moonstone Lounge, a part of the Hard Rock Hotel of San Diego. Gerber's rep denies the allegations: "These allegations were previously investigated and shown to be baseless. This lawsuit has no merit." [E!]
• Ouch: Scarlett Johansson's directorial debut was cut from the upcoming New York, I Love You for being "unwatchable." [PageSix]
• John Mayer's new romance is apparently over already; a rep for the singer claims that Mayer and Scheana Marie are "no longer in contact. She's been exaggerating her interactions with him." [E!]
• Oh, snap! Lily Allen was rejected when she tried to give a friendly hello kiss to Joan Collins. "Omg , was just introduced to joan collins, shook her hand and went to kiss her on the cheek," Lily wrote on her Twitter page. Apparently Joan's response was "I don't kiss people I don't know." Nobody messes with Alexis Morrell Carrington Colby Dexter Rowan! [TheSun]
• Lady Gaga has a new boyfriend, and his name is Speedy. [TheSun]
• "The reason I am in Los Angeles is that I'm making a television show that I can be proud of. One of my principle goals in life is to avoid embarrassing my children by doing what I do. And I think I've just about managed that."-Hugh Laurie [DailyMail]
• Casey Aldrige the father of Jamie Lynn Spears' baby, has been released from the hospital after sustaining injuries from a car accident. [People]
• Brigitte Bardot is speaking out against the slaughter of Egyptian pigs, a precautionary move meant to stop the potential spread of swine flu: "Taking advantage of the global hysteria over the propagation of 'Mexican' flu, which has nothing to do with animals, in order to launch a campaign to exterminate pigs raised by a destitute section of the population is extremely cowardly," Bardot says. [TimesOnline]
• A bouncer claims that Jon Gosselin is always on his best behavior when out with friends at a club: "He always has his wedding band on," the bouncer says, "He talks about his kids all the time. He loves his family." [People]
• PETA has backed out of a deal with Michael Vick, as the organization believes he's still not sorry for his crime: "Our No. 1 goal at PETA is to prevent cruelty to animals," says PETA's Dan Shannon, "I believe a genuine, contrite Michael Vick could convince people not to get involved in dog fighting. What we don't believe at this point is that there is a contrite, remorseful Michael Vick. At this point, it looks like there's zero chance." [AdAge]
• Kate Winslet on confronting the mean girls in her life: "I was shopping with my mum and we walked into a department store and I saw this girl behind the make-up counter who had been the ringleader of the mean girls at school. I walked up to her and said: 'Hello, how are you?' She said 'Oh fine, how are you?', a bit panicky because she remembered how much of a bitch she'd been and suddenly I was a bit well-known and she was very embarrassed. And I said:'So, working at a make-up counter, then?' This girl was going to be a model and her dad was going to buy her a car if she grew her fingernails. I said: 'Don't you want to be a model or a dancer?' She: 'No, I'm just waiting for, um, y'know a couple of contracts to come in and am doing this for the time being' and then she said: 'Things good for you then?' and I said: 'Yeah, they are - and I want to say thanks for being such a bitch 'cos you made me much, much stronger, so thanks a lot,' and walked off! And I thought: 'Yeeees! Come on!'"[DailyMail]

• Packing for tedious summits as a political wife must be that much harder knowing that Michelle Obama will be there, ready to rock some gorgeous outfit at the drop of a discussion paper. [Telegraph]

• Pamela Anderson is going to do an eco-friendly vegan line with Heatherette co-creator Richie Rich. Something tells me Pamela Anderson and Richie Rich will find a way to extract the air of dull virtuousness that still clings to eco-conscious clothing, and replace it with a little sex appeal. And a lot of sparkly gold lamé. [Hollyscoop]
• "The spot is a subtle tribute to the genius of Serge Gainsbourg and to the sensuality of Brigitte Bardot." Says. The. Director. Of the. Lindsay. Lohan. Fornarina. Ad. Well. He. Would. Say that. Wouldn't. He. Question mark. [WWD]
• Topshop is really truly absolutely finally opening its doors in New York's SoHo. As rumored, Kate Moss will do the ribbon-cutting on Thursday morning, before a huddled mass of 3,356,890,765 fashionistas yearning to be free/awaiting the slightest provocation to stampede. [WWD]
• Guardian writer Emily Rotberg has crucial suggestions for anyone planning to brave the Topshop melee on opening morning. Bring disinterested friends, Rotberg writes, to act as your runners and placeholders in various in-store queues, like the line for the fitting rooms, and don't bother asking the sales staff for help. "They are present to demonstrate how to wear a £10 shoelace as a headband," says Rotberg. Not to offer anyone assistance. Happy (Top)shopping! [Guardian]
• Valentino dropped into terrible Meatpacking district club 1OAK (which stands for "1 Of A Kind," a factoid I can't seem to scrub from my brain because of the very absurdity of a preposterous club in a neighborhood filled with identical preposterous clubs claiming some kind of singularity) for its gay-themed night. Then the designer left. Which might mean he was unimpressed with the level of talent available, or or that his 76-year-old ears were unwilling to weather 1OAK's musical onslaught. [P6]
• Marks & Spencer, the biggest British department store chain, reported a smaller-than-expected drop in same-store sales for the fourth quarter. After experiencing sales declines of 7.1% over the holiday quarter, analysts expected a similar slump in the numbers for the three months ended March 28 — but the company's comps only fell by 4.2%. [WSJ]
• Seven For All Mankind is going to do a 30-style footwear range for fall. Price range: $235-$550. [WWD]
• Pierre Cardin told Fantastic Man magazine that he's ready to sell his empire of licenses. For about $1.3 billion dollars. [P6]
• Lord & Taylor is instituting a company-wide salary freeze this year. [WSJ]
• In news that may shock and surprise you, the Italian luxury industry trade group, Altagamma, says it expects the $230 billion global fashion and luxury goods market to decline this year. I know. [WWD]
• A girl interned at Teen Vogue for a week, and spent a lot of time eating cupcakes, organizing accessories, and looking at pictures of models on the internet. You can tell from the accompanying pictures that she chose her outfits very carefully. Wise move. [Teen Vogue]

• Amy Winehouse is doing fine, says her spokesman, whom she pays to say such things. Despite tabloid rumors, she is not on a suicide watch. [People]
• Also, Amy's mom says Amy is a good influence on her goddaughter, Dionne, who wants to be a singer. [Daily Express]
• Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman: Back on. [People]
• Michelle Rodriguez was staying at a fancy hotel in Coconut Grove, FL but she must have had a fight with the ladyfriend she was traveling with: Guests heard two women yelling at 9am Sunday morning and one saw Michelle in the hallway, banging on the door, hollering, "If you don't open up, you're not getting your [pleasure toy] back." Then the door creaked open. [Rush & Molloy]
• Nick Nolte suffered smoke inhalation and abrasions during a fire at his home in Malibu. The blaze seems to have started in the bedroom due to an electrical problem, and when firefighters arrived Nolte was trying to put it out himself with a garden hose. [UPI, AP]

• Travis Barker is still in a burn center in an L.A. hospital. His condition has been "up and down." [E!]
• Travis tells Us Weekly: "I hate planes. My biggest fear ever is to be involved in a plane crash, so when that happened… well, I'm just thankful to be alive! I'm just grateful to be here at all. I am doing the best I can possibly be. I'm so anxious to get out of here. I've just been in surgery after surgery. I have third-degree burns basically from my feet up to my waist and both hands. One of my hands has second-degree burns and one has third-degree burns. I'm trying to have a quick recovery and play the drums again and be able to hold my kids again." [AP]
• Britney Spears may have to go to trial over driving without a valid license. This case stems from an August 2007 charge after she hit a parked car and left the scene. [USA Today]
• Jennifer Lopez and Leah Remini were attached at the hip at the Elle Women In Hollywood event: They even held hands when they went to the bathroom together. And yeah, Leah is a Scientologist. [E!]
• Natalie Portman has discovered microloans through Queen Rania of Jordan and says she's learning to curb her "accumulation mentality." When "you meet people who have one shirt," it makes you stop and think, Natalie says. "If I have 40 shirts, why would I ever buy anything more?" [Newser]
• It's official: Salma Hayek will be on 30 Rock, maybe shooting in the next few days. That show is the new Love Boat. [E!]
• Kanye West to Ellen: "You have really great style." [People]
• Ted Casablanca on Kanye and Ellen: "It's really refreshing to see a tough rapper so at home with the gay stuff." El oh el at "tough." [E!]
• Billy Ray Cyrus calls Miley's boyfriend, 20-year-old Justin Gaston, "a good kid." This was the one with the bible, you'll recall. [People]
• Meanwhile, a Hannah Montana co-creator is suing Disney over a percentage of the profits from licensed merchandise. Up against The Mouse in court? Good luck! [Perez Hilton]
• Penn Badgley, aka Dan Humphrey from Gossip Girl, has a crush on Parker Posey. [NY Mag]
• Josh Kelley is "always trying to impress" Katherine Heigl, if you care. [People]
• Eva Longoria will be a guest judge on Project Runway, not that we know when it will ever come back. [ONTD]
• Paris Hilton gets presidential advice from fake prez Matin Sheen. [Funny Or Die]
• Madonna wore Clark Kent-style specs at her NYC concert, and this Brit tab accuses her of stealing them from Lourdes. [The Sun]
• Maggie Gyllenhaal will be shilling Duracell batteries by becoming the spokesperson for the Power A Smile campaign, in which young ambassadors to deliver gifts to patients in children's hospitals this holiday season. [BrandWeek]
• Speaking of Gyllenhaals: Maggie and Jake's parents are calling it quits after decades of marriage. Does anyone stay together? Ever? [Perez Hilton]
• Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal are reportedly househunting in London. Sigh. [Daily Express]
• Jamie Lynn Spears and her baby daddy Casey Aldridge are on the cover of OK! magazine with the cover line "I'm No Cheater." More on this in Midweek Madness… [Perez Hilton]
• Scarlett Johansson wears red white and blue on the kookily patriotic cover of CosmoGirl!. [PopSugar]
• Bad news for Eddie Izzard fans: The Riches has been canceled. [UPI]
• Could The View win an Emmy if Elisabeth Hasselbeck left? [LA Times]
• Janet Jackson may or may not have vertigo. [Perez Hilton]
• Lily Allen may have a new man, since she was photographed in the vicinity of some random dude. [The Sun]
• The Iranian actress in Leo DiCaprio's new flick, Body Of Lies says: "I had a lot of problems because of this movie. (Iranian officials) took my passport. The intelligence service interrogated me several times. In the end, the judge said, 'We have to see the movie and then decide what we're going to do with you.'" She is afraid to go home to Iran and is living in France with her husband since the incident. [Daily Express]
• Whee! Slash action figure! [UPI]
• There's a picture of Paul McCartney in a McDonald's in Liverpool, but he's been a vegetarian for 30 years. Sir Paul is pissed. [The Sun]
• A bouncer asked Stephen Dorff to smoke outside and he yelled, "Do you want a piece of me? You don’t know who you’re messing with." Yeah, probably not. You're an actor, right? [The Sun]
• A post-divorce Bill Murray is looking for renewal. He says when his ex-wife filed papers alleging that he abused her and was addicted to alcohol and marijuana, "That was devastating. That was the worst thing that ever happened to me in my entire life." [AP]
• The new Bond girl was born with six fingers on each hand. [Newser]
• Dancing With The Stars' Derek Hough is living with girlfriend Shannon Elizabeth — as is his entire band. [People]
• Love, LOVE this artwork for Cadillac Record, starring Adrien Brody, Jeffrey Wright and Beyoncé. [Concrete Loop]
• Things you never wanted to know about Rob Lowe's nanny: She allegedly only dates black guys because of their cocks. She bragged that her boyfriend's penis was "the second largest black cock in the NBA.'" [TMZ]
• Brody Jenner has found "the one" and she is a 22-year-old Playmate named Jayde Nicole, of course. [Perez Hilton]
• "I'm not the ... pervert that I've been painted to be." Peter Cook, Christie Brinkley's ex, to Barbara Walters in an interview that will air Friday on ABC's 20/20. [People]
• "[Society wants women] on anti-depressants so they are no longer creative or fierce. They dull your rage. People don't like angry women so they say, 'We're going to have to drug that bitch to get her to shut up. We will humiliate her and disenfranchise her, but first she has to shut up.'" — Roseanne Barr. [Guardian]
• "She calls herself feminist but she's not. She's a careerist. I had a time in my life too when I didn't stay at home with my kids because I was on a bigger mission. She'll pay for it later though. She'll get her karma… In the 60s we used to say if a woman ruled the world there would be no war. But that's not right. What we mean is a thinking, conscious woman, and there's no place for any of us in this world. To make it in a man's world takes a certain kind of woman. Sarah Palin is the kind of woman they want right now." — Roseanne Barr. [Guardian]
• "By denying the responsibility of man in global warming, by advocating gun rights and making statements that are disconcertingly stupid, you are a disgrace to women and you alone represent a terrible threat, a true environmental catastrophe." — Brigitte Bardot, in a letter to Sarah Palin and John McCain. [Yahoo News]
• "In my opinion, Stephen King is without question our greatest writer. No one tells a better story than Stephen… I set out to write a good story with The Notebook, one that would sell 10 million copies and make me rich… and I did." — Nicholas Sparks. [Page Six]
• "Posh doesn't strike me as particularly stylish. I don't think she's a good example of British style at all." — Mischa Barton. [The Sun]
• "I won't respond to that. That doesn't even deserve the dignity of a response. I don't know the details of that. It is absolutely ridiculous… This from the Guardian? I don't believe it! It is insulting that you would even bring it up! My God… I turned down the Mail to do this!" —Faye Dunaway, on the rumor that she threw a cup of urine in Roman Polanski's face when the director refused to allow bathroom breaks on the set of Chinatown. [Guardian, via NY Mag]