[Los Angeles, November 6. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

1. The Feather Duster
Is it a mullet? Is it (shudder) a shag? Wait til you see this angle:

Didn't Alyssa Milano have this same 'do on Who's The Boss? Thanks to Fey Friends, you can see this guy naked. NSFW, obviously.

2. The Fabio
There's not enough Pantene Pro-V in the world to fix those split ends. Only a pair of scissors can cure what ails this gentleman. (You can see this guy naked too. NSFW.)

3. The Dorothy Hamill

Fey Friends calls this one the Kate Jackson, but it's clearly a Dorothy. This shaggy look is actually making a comeback, on teenage Disney Channel stars and that one guy on Bravo's Million Dollar Listing. Be afraid.

4. The Soul Glo
A Jheri curl on steroids! The faux commercial from Coming To America was so solidly based in reality it almost wasn't funny.

5. The Lace-Front Man-Weave

John Travolta has one. So does Brendan Fraser. Lord only knows what is up with Nicolas Cage's hair these days.

Oh! Here's a close up of Revolta:

6. The Long-Ass Combover

Joe Biden's hair-plug and comb-over combo is a desperate attempt for you to listen to his words and not look at his scalp. Why are some guys so afraid of going bald? It doesn't sap your strength! Ask James Carville.

7. The Silver Scrub Brush

Jay Manuel is the only one who knows what the hell this is all about.

8. The Electric Shock Treatment Therapy

This is the dude, yes, dude from Tokio Hotel. I hate to sound like my mom but: Kids today are crazy.

Want to nominate a dude with wretched hair? Feel free to post pix in the comments!

The Way of the Bro Coiffure [Radar]
Inexcusable Hairdos on the Nude Dudes of Playgirl [WOW Report]
The Worst of Playgirl: Tresses Messes [Fey Friends] (NSFW)

[Celebrity images via AP.]

• Whoa, Reese Witherspoon runs a tight ship! And now that Jake Gyllenhaal has moved in, he has to abide by the rules: "Reese believes in wide-open communication, and she discussed at length with him what is best for her household,” sez a source. "Some of (the things she insists on) are run-of-the-mill. He has to take off his shoes when he’s in the house; trash must be taken out when the can is three-quarters full; and no feet on the coffee table." Plus! "Jake used to swear like a sailor, but not anymore. If he does, he has to apologize." [MSNBC]
• Jennifer Lopez doesn't let her twins "repeat" clothes: They wear a new designer outfit every day. They also have Waterford crystal bottles. That's a joke. Maybe. [Showbiz Spy]
• Madonna, Guy Ritchie and the kids went for a stroll in New York, so is the marriage really on the rocks? [Mirror]

• Oh, and Madonna is "loving" the attention she's getting from the scandal. She and Guy aren't planning on divorcing and she's not into A-Rod. Plus, Guy's not bothered by anything Cynthia Rodriguez has to say: "They have an unconventional marriage," a source says. [Page Six]
• Alex Rodriguez is trying to save his marriage. Good luck! [The Sun]
• Here are some shots from that "very deep," "top secret" video Britney is filming for Madonna's Sticky and Sweet tour. (As previously reported, apparently you see a person wearing a black hoodie who gets stuck on an elevator. When this person realizes she's trapped and can't get out, she starts to kick the walls and hit things. She screams into the camera. Then she takes off the hood, revealing long blonde locks, looks into the camera and says, "It's Britney, bitch." Haha, deep as a paper plate. [E!]
• Something is up with Britney's child custody case: A hearing that was supposed to happen today is rescheduled for Friday. Here's the thing: Britney's not supposed to be able to get custody while she is in a conservatorship with her dad: If you can't take care of yourself, how can you take care of others? So something's gotta give… We'll see. [TMZ]
• Lily Allen, who recently got back together with ex Ed Simons, has a new song on her MySpace page, about getting back together with an ex. [The Sun]
• Justin Timberlake's grandma thinks he should get hitched to Jessica Biel. "I just want them to be happy," she says, probably prompted by a British reporter. "Justin should get married in Lynn’s back yard in Tennessee. She has a big yard with beautiful flowers. I think it would be perfect. Jessica’s really sweet. She’s his age and isn’t possessive. I think their personalities are a lot alike." [The Sun]
• Angelina Jolie's dad, Jon Voight, is "so excited" about the twins, though he hasn't spoken to Angie yet. It sucks that they're estranged, but he can read all about her on the newsstand, huh? [Yahoo News]
• The leather jacket Angie wore in Wanted is up for charity auction, as is a golf session with Morgan Freeman. Tough choices. [E!]
• The battle for Angie's baby pictures is getting heated: Will it be OK! or People? [Rush & Molloy]
• Quentin Tarantino and Brad Pitt are meeting today regarding QT's WWII movie Inglorious Bastards. [Deadline Hollywood]
• Sienna Miller is seeing Balthazar Getty, but she didn't bust up his marriage. A source says he and his wife have been on the rocks for a year and quietly separated. [Rush & Molloy]
• Mug shots of Josh Brolin and Jeffrey Wright after the bar brawl in Louisiana. [Rush & Molloy]
• Blind item! "Which cocaine-loving actress is said to be relying on her closeted husband to meet guys? A source says that when they were at a party recently, the hubby asked a fellow guest, 'Do you want to bleep my wife? Because you can.'" [Rush & Molloy]
• Kylie Minogue: Aussie tour! [News.com.au]
• The Vanity Fair cover of sorta nekkid Miley Cyrus garnered a record-breaking 915 reader letters, mostly negative. [WWD]
• Whoopi Goldberg will be in the Broadway musical Xanadu for six weeks while the The View is on hiatus. Will she rollerskate? [NY Times]
• Page Six got something wrong and Paris Hilton is pissed; try to muster some interest. [Perez Hilton]
• Heath Ledger's family went to the premiere of Dark Knight last night. His father says the movie was "very good." [People]
• If Michelle Williams wants little Matilda to receive Heath's assets, she'll have to file a claim with Australian court. [News.com.au]
• Hopefully Khloe Kardashian likes stripes! She violated her drunk driving probation and has to serve 30 days in jail. She's supposed to report to the facility on Friday. [AP]
• The policeman from the Village People is recovering from vocal cord surgery. Be well, macho man. [Reuters]
• Brendan Fraser was a producer on Journey to the Center of the Earth and saved a bunch of money by changing the script: "Some people look beyond their nose and say, 'It's just writing.' Yeah well, you know, [whispers] It's the best part. All we have to do is change the screenplay around a bit, restructure it, it's a quick thing. It's a cheap fix, in other words." Sure, sure, change a writer's words, they love that. [LA Times]
• Holy crap. Janet Charlton's house is freakin awesome. Is this how bloggers live? Where is my freakin tiki bar??? Or pool, for that matter? [WOW Report]
• Okay, so you know how Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood left his wife for an 19 year old Kazakhstan waitress? His family is begging him to come home, because apparently he and Miss Ekaterina Ivanova are on a drinking binge: Ronnie's been downing two bottles of vodka a day for the last ten days. It's only rock and roll… [Daily Mail]
• Amy Winehouse is making Blake Incarcerated a scrapbook of stickers of footballers. [The Sun]
• You could read this "night in the life of Amy Winehouse," but you probably already know what it says: She arrives disheveled, drinks a passion fruit daiquiri, hollers about mayonnaise, writes a letter to "my Blakey" ("I can't wait to see you and fuck you senseless"), maybe does coke in the loo, jumps in the trunk of a Mercedes and makes it home by 3:30 am. [Mirror]
• Rocky Aoki, founder of Benihana restaurants, died last week, and his daughter Devon was seen shopping for dark sunglasses. [Page Six]
• "When you make out on the show, it's just an open mouth. Your lips are touching each other, but there's definitely no kissing" — Blake Lively of Gossip Girl. [Page Six]
• "Obesity is not a disease, as the Americans term it, but it's just greed. The only cure for being fat is to 'not eat.'" — Ricky Gervais. [Mirror]

The Good:
I think that both Abigail Breslin and her top are adorable.
Jodie Foster: Still beautiful.
Looking too skinny again, but I do love Kate Bosworth's sorta mumsy dress.
Pretty good for SJP. (At least she's not wearing the Uggs and puffy coat.)

The Bad:
Valley of the Dolls much, Anita Briem?
OMG! It's Encino Man Brandon Fraser! I loved that movie buuuuudy! Too bad he looks like he hasn't changed his wardrobe since it premiered.
Christina Ricci did not get the memo about why one does not wear a short shiny white dress.
Did Emile Hirsch get dressed in his dad's clothes?
Why is Maggie Gyllenhaal wearing her support garments over her dress?
Seth Rogen? Or your high school chemistry teacher?

The Ugly:
Is Anne Hathaway starring in a film version of Little House on the Prairie? Or a public service announcement for "When Bad Shoes Happen To Good People"?
Um, how old are you, Robert Downey, Jr?

[Images via Bauer-Griffin]