Arrest Warrant Issued For Girls Gone Wild Creator Joe Francis

A federal judge has ordered that Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis be placed under arrest, part of an incredibly seedy and frankly hilarious bankruptcy trial that sounds exactly like how you’d picture Joe Francis behaving. Francis is believed to be living in Mexico with his girlfriend and their twin daughters. » 5/20/15 12:10pm 5/20/15 12:10pm

American Hero Nonchalantly Adjusts Boobs Before Baseball Game Selfie

Before this video, I thought there were only two reasons to go to a baseball game: One, to eat as many garlic fries as possible before vomiting and 2, arguing with the people in front of you about something of no actual consequence. Now I know there are three reasons to go. The third reason? Glorious, shameless,… » 5/04/15 11:20pm 5/04/15 11:20pm

Your Boobs Are Poised for a Major Breakthrough

Boobs: What is there to say about them that hasn't been said? Turns out, quite a lot — from women. And if us gals have our way about the girls, we will be monopolizing the conversation about our boobs from here to eternity, which is kind of nice, seeing as how we've had so little say in their presentation up to now. » 9/13/14 2:00pm 9/13/14 2:00pm

Want Bigger Breasts? Massage Them With Fresh Summer Vegetables

Breasts: Everyone wants them, but not everyone's got them. Hi, I'm Billy Mays and I'm here to tell you about a revolutionary new way of increasing your bust size without having to chant some stupid rhymes about boys and sweaters. What if I told you that you could make your breasts bigger just by rubbing them with… » 8/13/14 8:15pm 8/13/14 8:15pm

Fight Stigma of Female Nipples With This Top That Looks Like Boobs

Female nipples are so out right now. Instagram doesn't want 'em. In most states, it's still illegal to wave 'em around even though the same standards of decency don't apply to men. And Facebook won't let you link to 'em in photos because decency, The Children, the female body is the root of all sin, etc. But a growing… » 6/23/14 2:00pm 6/23/14 2:00pm

Nobody Wants to Buy Victoria's Secret's Dumb 'Sexy' Sports Bras

Last year, Victoria's Secret announced a new frontier in tit innovation: sports bras that don't squish boobs down like other, shitty sports bras that actually serve the function they're designed to serve. The boobologists at VS were going to push sexy sports bras, for the woman who can't even for a second bear the… » 5/05/14 4:40pm 5/05/14 4:40pm