Earlier: Oprah's Favorite Things 2007: The Audience Freaks Out!

• Dina Lohan is pissed that Michael Lohan keeps leaking recordings of Dina and Lindsay's phone calls to him. "The tapes were from a long time ago, and for a father to stoop this low is unforgivable," she says. And:

"My ex-husband has been in and out of jail for 10 years. My children and I gave him a chance to get to know them again, and he clearly blew that chance!" And: "I have had a criminal order of protection from the domestic violence sector since 2005. He was not supposed to even be harassing me by phone." Lastly, if you're still listening: "My heart is breaking for my children that he could do this. He has no visitation anymore and is six months behind in child support. The authorities have been alerted!" [E!]

• Hey, guess what? Michael Lohan has released another recording of a phone conversation between himself and Dina Lohan. She blames him for Lindsay cutting herself, and says: "It's bad." And Dina believes that "something's gonna happen" and it'll be all Michael's fault. [Radar Online]
• Rosie O'Donnell and Megan Fox are afraid of Angelina Jolie. Kristen Stewart says she doesn't want to be like Angelina Jolie. This column asks, Is Hollywood turning on Angelina Jolie? Eh, do you think she gives a shit? [MSNBC Scoop]
• This daytime noir Donnie Darko-esque promo for James Franco on General Hospital is kind of fucking awesome. "Anyone can die at anytime!" [NY Magazine]
• Miss J says of his 7-year-old son: "He insists on wearing nice shoes. I think somehow my fashion genes must have slipped in there." [Us Magazine]
• Kate Hudson is "pushing" A-Rod to elope. Because that's what women do! [Gatecrasher]
• Rihanna spent more than $50,000 to fly her family to New York from Barbados for the Glamour Awards. [Page Six]
• You can watch Rihanna's speech from the Glamour Woman of the Year Awards at the link. A snippet: "Maya Angelou, I love you, but you make this terribly difficult for me." [YouTube]
• LOL headline of the day, via Russell Brand: "Katy Can't Do Your Show… She's Doing Me Instead." [The Sun]
• Kristen Stewart on those who ask whether she and Rob are an item: "The only way that I'm able to stay sane is to protect myself, and like, I know that it doesn't matter how you answer a question, it's going to tip. Someone's going to say, 'She's totally with him,' or, 'No, I don't think she is,' so it's sort of like, I don't care. You just have to seriously be like, have it, have it all. Take my, you know what I mean, just like, you want my shoes? Here you go, what size do you wear?" [ET]
• The 40-year-old women following Zac Efron around were just trying to get his picture for their daughters. No, really. [Page Six]
• Emma Thompson made some comments about her adopted Rwandan son had been subjected to racism at the University of Exeter, and now the Culture Secretary has said: "Miss Thompson is a great actress, but her comments about Exeter… are insulting… Any incidence of racism is one too many, but Exeter comes top or near top in every survey of places for friendliness and quality of life." [Telegraph]
• Sharon Stone was at a fancy Madison Avenue salon and used a private room; Queen Noor of Jordan was also there to get her hair done, but sat in the main area with the plebes. [Page Six]
• The David Letterman blackmail case is "all out war." [NY Post]
• Michael Jackson's funeral bills are in. Total cost: $855,730.31. [TMZ]
• Janet Jackson, called here "the only Jackson who was flush with cash," fronted $49,000 for Michael Jackson's funeral. She'll be reimbursed via his estate, which will also pay the remaining balance. [TMZ]
• Joe Jackson, who was trying to object to Michael Jackson's will and executors, has been shut down by a judge. [TMZ]
• An Andy Warhol portrait of Michael Jackson sold for $812,000 in an auction last night. [NY Post]
• "Winona Ryder and Barry Pepper have been cast to star in the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie When Love Is Not Enough: The Lois Wilson Story." It's the true story of the co-founder of Al-Anon and her alcoholic husband, who lived the high life in the 1920s but a downfall by the 50s. [Variety]
• Playgirl wanted to shoot Levi Johnston in the penthouse of a certain downtown hotel but didn't have enough cash to pay the fee. [Page Six]
• Dominique Swain, who once posed for PETA, has reportedly been "caught" dumping unvaccinated puppies at an animal shelter. [ONTD, Fox 411]
• Heather Locklear's return to Melrose Place is a desperate attempt to get people to care. Is it working on you? Then check out this clip from the show in which Heather — playing Amanda — says, "When I hired you to give this place a makeover, I didn't mean smear it with lipstick and turn it into a five-dollar hooker." [People]
• Celine Dion is adding a "pool complex" to her home in Jupiter Island, Florida — with "two giant pools, waterslides and a lazy river, much like an amusement park." One neighbor complains: "Distasteful is what it looks like - the whole thing sounds like a Michael Jackson fairyland to me." [MSNBC Scoop via Life & Style]
• Some dude is suing Bon Jovi, Time Warner and Major League Baseball for $400 billion, yeah, BILLION, dollars. He claims that he wrote an ode to the Boston Red Sox entitled, "(Man I Really) Love this Team." During the 2007 playoffs, Bon Jovi released a song, "I Love This Town," and the guy took the case to court. One judge dismissed it, but the guy is appealing. [Reuters]
• George Lopez's new late night talk show debuted with strong ratings. Did anyone watch? I found it only mildly funny, with too many race jokes. But I didn't watch the whole thing. [Reuters]
• Steven Tyler supposedly quit Aerosmith, but last night he showed up at an NYC club for Joe Perry's show, announced he wasn't leaving Aerosmith, and joined in on "Walk This Way." My friend Matt says: "If anyone can save the future of Aerosmith by settling the feud between Steven Tyler and Joe Perry, it's got to be Tyler Perry." [Roger Friedman's 411.com] 
• Shakira hugged and 11-year-old fan and it is news. [Page Six]
• Sir Ian McKellan mocked Jude Law at a charity event; Jude swore, "I go home religiously every night after Hamlet." Sir Ian joked, "I guess the night I saw you, you went home via [popular NYC nightclub] the Box." [La Dolce Musto]
• Julianne Hough and Chuck Wicks have broken up. [People]
• "A rare collection of Beatles autographs and photographs, given to a 14-year-old who traipsed across Salisbury plain in the rain to catch a glimpse of her heroes on the set of Help!, sold for £2,200 at auction in Berkshire yesterday." [Guardian]
• Rod Stewart, father of seven, is trying to have another baby with wife Penny Lancaster. Forever young? [People]
• Whatshername will be on I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here but arrive late and earn five times more cash than other contestants. [The Sun]
• "I think there's a lot of persuasive and powerful people around Obama. For a president to make his own decisions, I think that's a rarity. Even someone who we think of as our guy — this is a guy with integrity, a guy who cares, for the first time in a long time — in the Oval Office, even with him we don't really know who's pulling the strings. I think of every president as being a marionette. Whether he's any different, I don't know. Certainly his military advisers all want him to prosecute this war to the end, just as they did in Vietnam with LBJ. It's just too depressing, I think we're going to have to hit the streets. Obama has the chance of becoming JFK or LBJ. I think JFK was one of our last great presidents, although I thought Carter was pretty great too. LBJ could have been a great president if he hadn't gotten bogged down in war, but that was quite a war to get bogged down in. Notwithstanding the fact that the war was wrong and they were talking about the Red Scare and the domino effect, if you go and read the Pentagon Papers they were also talking about rubber, tin and oil. They killed two and a half million people. What was it all for? In Korea they killed four and a half million. Like, we're liberating these people?" — Woody Harrelson plays a soldier in his intense new film The Messenger and, at the link, has lots of thoughts about war, death, the military and President Obama. [Salon]
• "They got in trouble because my children are riding their dirt bikes through the whole trailer park, going crazy, doing flips — and everyone's concerned for their safety. And mom's like, 'Oh, they've been riding the whole weekend, they're having a blast!' I was like, 'They're not allowed to ride their dirt bikes in the trailer park!' They terrorize the neighborhood the whole time." — Pamela Anderson's sons — 13 and 11 — are tiny terrors. [Contact Music]
• "I don't have to play scenes with actors standing on buckets." — Sigourney Weaver, 6 feet tall, says that she doesn't believe her height has ever intimidated leading men. [Telegraph]
• "I had a great time with Hef and the girls when they came to see Peepshow and hang out in Vegas.  I don't watch the other episodes though, because it kind of makes me mad. The girls need to focus on what makes them unique and not doing the same things Bridget, Kendra and I have already done on the show.  Even camping in the backyard was an idea I had for an episode that we never got around to shooting.  And guess what they just showed? The girls camping in the backyard.  I don't want to look behind, I want to look forward." — Holly Madison is annoyed by the new Girls Next Door. [Fox 411]
• "I don't know that [Oprah] and Gayle are necessarily doing each other, but I think they are the emotional equivalent of.. [a gay couple]. When they did that road trip, that's as gay as it gets, and I don't mean it to be an insult, either. I'm just saying, listen, if you ask me, that's the couple." — Rosie O'Donnell. [ONTD via Times Of The Internet]
• "These jeans are a few days old, but the top is probably fresh because it gets to the point where even I can't stand the air around me. I don't know, my personal hygiene - it's so disgusting! Really it's just that I have very few clothes that I like and I'm travelling all the time, so I can't really get any more." — we get it, Robert Pattinson, you're filthy. [MSNBC via New! magazine]
• "I love clothes, and fashion is a great art form. Being a woman and my femininity are very important to me. But with my work I have to check my preferences at the door and personify the character I am playing as best I can. Your character isn't who you are. That's the great thing about my job. I get to step into somebody else's shoes – whether that's a pair of flat brogues or some stilettos." — Hilary Swank. [Daily Mail]
• "I'd love to have kids… But I'm much to young to get married." — Shakira. [Gatecrasher]
• "The funny thing is that I was very open and honest about [my bisexuality] from the very beginning, and everyone was acting like it was some new trend. Go back four or five years, people, and you'll see the same answer. I've been very honest with him from the get-go. I think women are beautiful. I've had a lot of fun with women, and I'm not ashamed of it. The problem is that I also love a well-endowed man. But just because I enjoy women doesn't mean I'm allowed to have affairs in my relationship. I learned through talking with my therapist that it is still cheating even if it's with girls, so there is a rule there." — Fergie. [Us Magazine via The Advocate, Page Six]
• "Lady Gaga stole your act." — President Obama to Cyndi Lauper. [La Dolce Musto]

[East Rutherford, October 22. Image via Getty]

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - OCTOBER 22: General view of at the Meadowlands Sports Complex on October 22, 2009 in East Rutherford, New Jersey. (Photo by Michael N. Todaro/Getty Images)

• Angelina Jolie started working on Salt yesterday, and her character, rogue CIA operative Evelyn A. Salt, has a couple of different looks:

So far we're seeing raven-haired and blonde. Oh, and here's an interesting quote from producer Lorenzo di Bonaventura, about reworking the script originally intended for Tom Cruise: "I had no idea how complex it would be," he says. "We had to rethink the whole notion of how a man vs. a woman operates in the business world, in personal relationship and in friendships." This should be interesting. [USA Today]

• Well, this just isn't nice: After reports came out that Guy Ritchie calls Madonna "It," Madge has been sent 100 copies of the horror movie Stephen King's It. "She's received the packages at all of her addresses so she suspects they are from somebody she knows. And she is furious," a source claims. [News.com.au]
• Krishna Siqueira is the ex-gf of Madonna's new "friend," Jesus Luz. She says: "He is a wonderful person. We were dating and then the magazine shoot came up. Then came the story that he was with her [Madonna]. We took some time out because we imagined he was going away to live and could not continue long-distance dating." Krishna says Jesus is not with Madonna for the publicity: "He's not that kind of person." [Daily Mail]
• Rihanna's family: Apparently not happy about her reconciliation with Chris Brown. "Everyone wants them to take a break, to cool off," a relative of Rihanna tells People. "No one wants them back together." The couple has left Miami and is now in L.A. [People]
• Lindsay Lohan's New York apartment, which she never actually slept in, is for sale. You get two bedrooms, two bathrooms, floor-to-ceiling windows, and an unobstructed view of the Statue of Liberty for the low, low price of $1,200,000. Any takers? [Gothamist]
• Oh, Christ. Lindsay Lohan's crazy ass father has started contacting Lily Allen. Lily says: "I got a Twitter from her dad saying 'Dear Lily, I think you have an alcohol problem that needs addressing. From Michael Lohan.' I was, like, leave me alone." This is not good. [The Sun]
• What's this? Michael Lohan had lunch with Courtenay Semel? A spy says it was superserious: "There was no laughing and no smiling." What could they have been talking about??? [E!]
• Nadya Suleman, mother of 14, says her original six kids are already jealous of the octuplets. When a friend showed the kids a picture of their new siblings, "they hit the picture," Suleman says. Oh, and by the way, she has a new house: "It's safe. It's about 2,800 square feet, four bedrooms. I don't want anyone to know where we are. I have trust issues. I know there are a lot of emotionally disturbed people." [MSNBC Scoop]
• George Clooney texted ex Lisa Snowdon and it made the paper. [Daily Express]
• WTF. Lauren Conrad has a novel?!?! The tome, L.A. Candy, is about Jane, a girl who moves to L.A. and unexpectedly becomes the star of a reality television show. Shocking. [People]
• Britney's family is excited for her tour, which will include a three-ring circus setup and magic tricks. Are they the only ones? [People]
• Wait: Madonna might join Britney on stage. That would be good. [Gatecrasher]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Mariah Carey is not pregnant. Her "baby" is her dog, Jack, and he may be getting his own reality show. Barf. No, wait: Arf. [Fox 411]
• Amy Winehouse has moved out of Camden to a gated house in the suburbs. Though she seems to be planning a "massive Camden pub crawl." [Daily Mail]
• Sharon Osbourne has been sued by the woman whose hair she grabbed on Rock of Love: Charm School. The charges? Battery, negligence and infliction of emotional distress. Seems like the emotional distress part is from just being on a reality show, no? [TMZ]
• Did you catch Jimmy Fallon's first show last night? Apparently Robert DeNiro, who rarely does talk shows, was pretty funny. [Fox 411]
• Mickey Rourke danced with a bathroom attendant. [Gatecrasher]
• Whee! Ashley Jensen, aka Christina, will return to Ugly Betty. She announced she was leaving in January, but now says: "It's time I challenged myself professionally. They haven't killed by character off, so I'll be back at some point." Her Scottish brogue would be sorely missed. [The Sun]
• Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester is inside the new issue of In Style and in this photo, she looks hungover and strung out. [Just Jared]
• Matthew McConaughey is officially in the record business! He's producing a Bermudian roots-reggae artist, naturally. McConaughey says of Mishka: "My one-liner to him is ‘Look, man, I think your music needs to be heard by more ears than it has. I've heard it. I love it. Anybody I've ever turned on to your music ends up loving it.'" Then he put the bong down. [Rolling Stone]
• Danny Boyle may helm the next Bond flick. Upgrade? [The Sun]
• ABC TV series Life On Mars has been canceled. [Variety]
• Uh-oh: The food may have been spoiled at Elton John's Oscar party; some guests ended up "vomiting for days." [Page Six]
• Angela Bassett will make her directorial debut with United States, an indie feature in which a prominent black literary figure writes a faux autobiography from the perspective of a barely literate hoodlum to decry what is wrong with the glorification of "ghetto" culture… and the book is a hit. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Natalie Imbruglia is not, repeat, not dating Prince Harry. She says: "He was just at my birthday party. That was it. I met him for about two seconds." [Daily Express]
• Sienna Miller is trying to charm people in the film industry in L.A. after being shunned over her affair with Balthazar Getty. Good luck! [Daily Express]
• John Travolta and Kelly Preston have written a letter to Lady Lake, FL, thanking the town for its support after their son Jett died. [UPI]
• Someone broke the windows in Jay Kay from Jamiroquai's Ferrari, but it's hard to care. [Daily Mail]
• Check out this Ricky Gervais meltdown, in which he is not pulling a "Christian Bale," even if that is the headline. [LA Times]
• You know how Bruce Willis is being sued for "walking off the set" of a flick he was supposed to direct? He's calling the suit "frivolous and without merit." [E!]
• The Flaming Lips track, "Do You Realize," is now Oklahoma's official rock song. [AP]
• Spinal Tap: Live! The "Unwigged and Unplugged" tour starts April 17 in Vancouver. [AP]
• Simply Red's plane was forced to make an emergency landing en route from Buenos Aires to Brazil, but everyone is okay. Holding back the years tears! [Reuters]
• If you're living on a prayer, get psyched for the Bon Jovi book which comes out in the fall — an "insider portrait" with previously unpublished photographs and text by the band members. [AP]
• Blind item! "Which sexy NYC-based celeb's pickup line needs a little improvement? 'Have we met?' he asks. 'Have we had sex? No? Do you want to?'" [Gatecrasher]
• Bad news: Fred Durst is making a comeback. [Page Six]
• Jim Carrey's daughter Jane has a band called the Jane Carrey band. [The Life Files]
• Legal troubles for Sean Connery: Did he profit from a loan to a former friend? [Daily Mail]
• "Because this album is so sonically different than anything I've done before and captures many flavors of my emotional life and voice, it needed an entirely new name. 'Terra Incognita' means unknown territory — and that's where I wanted to go musically. The guitars are more wild and atmospheric. The groove is dark and deep and allow for a lot of sonic contrasts. It took me five years to really cut my teeth both as a performer and as a songwriter and I wanted to break all the habits I'd gotten used to and let songs develop out of a groove or simple piano notes and melody." — Juliette Lewis, on her new album with her new band, the New Romantiques, who are replacing her former band, The Licks. [NME]
• "I think that criticism is a good thing because it teaches you to (ask) some questions." — Juliette Binoche, on her new dance performance, which the Times of London called "intermittently excruciating." [Breitbart]
• "I'm coping mostly and I'm mostly clean, I won't lie to you it is a struggle. My dad and I are estranged. In his mind if I'm still ­using in any way then I'm not his son. But my mum speaks to me ­secretly. I try and wrap myself up enough so that it doesn't get to me and I don't feel anything but really of course it gets to me. I love the man and I grew up kind of idolising him. It's breaking my heart that for him the be-all and end-all of our relationship is whether or not there's something despicable in my bloodstream. I'd love to just go to football with him like we used to or just go for a drink and be a son and him a father." — Pete Doherty. [Daily Express]

Seen (as pictured) at the Charlotte Ronson show this afternoon (Charlotte is Sam Ronson's twin sister, by the by) LL said: "I'm really sick right now. I think I have an ear infection." Plus: "I'm not sure what I'm doing the rest of the week," she shrugged. You heard it here first: Apathy is so hot right now. [WWD]

• Oh and Lindsay Lohan, who you'll recall once worked with the likes of Jane Fonda and Meryl Streep, has been cast as the lead female role in the remake of A Nightmare On Elm Street. [Just Jared]
• Wait, no she wasn't! [Just Jared]
• This just in: Chris Brown had a "secret meeting" in LA on Thursday night with his mom and other family members and friends. Guess what: He and Rihanna have "officially broken up." And Chris thinks he will not, repeat, NOT go to jail. He told those gathered: "Protect me. I'm your homeboy." [Radar]
• Patrick Swayze, who just got over pneumonia and is still battling cancer, continues to smoke. Ugh! [The Sun]
• In a completely natural follow up to Twilight, Robert Pattinson's next role will be Spanish surrealist painter Salvador Dalí in Little Ashes. [People]
• Jerry O'Connell tried out a breast pump on Ellen and talked about the breastfeeding habits of his wife, Rebecca Romijn, who recently had twins. "I'm not saying anything dirty, it's natural but [Rebecca] does what we call the double football – which is just incredible, because it's like three beings attached," he says. "It's like something out of Cirque du Soleil. It's crazy." [People]
• Apparently the rumors that Mickey Rourke and Courtney Love were hooking up are not true. In this video he says he'd rather "be on a deserted island with a gorilla." [TMZ]
• Angela Suleman, the octuplets' grandmother has been put under a gag order after it was revealed that she may have been paid for her interview with RadarOnline.com. Her daughter Nadya's publicist said: "I had to put a gag on Nadya's mother, who sold her out… They paid her $40,000 to sell [Nadya] out, and she can't talk about her daughter for three months." [Perez Hilton]
• Hilary Duff will appear on the Diet Coke Style Series during fashion week, being interviewed along with Christian Siriano and Heidi Klum. [Ad Rants]
• Bon Jovi is suing a former employee of the arena footbal team he owns, the Philadelphia Soul, for allegedly making his own version of their championship rings and selling them to the public. [TMZ]
• In this video, Ashanti says she doesn't know if she'd call the cops on an abuser like Rihanna (supposedly) did. [TMZ]
• Will Smith says he and wife Jada have "reached out" to both Chris Brown and Rihanna and offered to do whatever they need, even if they just want to be left alone. "If there are mistakes people make, then they should be willing to live up to the mistakes and do whatever penance they need to do. I don't think it's up to us, specifically the media, with such a fast hand to try to chop someone's head off," says Smith. [People]
• Handsome gentleman John Legend on the Chris Brown/Rihanna situation: "I know both of them. I was surprised when I heard because it doesn't strike me as something Chris would do. "You never know what's inside people or what can trigger that. It's an awful story. I feel terrible for both of them but if Chris did what they said he did, that's unacceptable. He has to accept the consequences of it." [People]
• Teenyboppers, brace yourselves: Nick Jonas and Selena Gomez have split up. [Perez Hilton]
• Mandy Moore talked about her recent engagement to Ryan Adams on The Bonnie Hunt Show and says she is "very happy." [People]
• Former Ronette Estelle Bennett died Wednesday at her home in New Jersey at age 67. Along with the rest of the group, Estelle sang the 60s hits "(Walking) in the Rain," "Baby, I Love You," and "Be My Baby." [Pitchfork Media]
• Naomi Watts says her Clive Owen, her co-star in The International is "not to me in real life. On the screen, yeah." She added, "[Owen] is a total pussy cat, incredibly funny, great kind of British schoolboy silly sense of humor and likes to be teased, can laugh at himself. But incredibly focused and well committed to his work. I loved working with him." [CBS News]
• Carrie Underwood says she's anti-Valentine's Day. "I don't believe – and this goes for anybody – your man shouldn't love you for one day out of 365. He should love you 365 days out of the year. I want Valentine's Day every day," she says. [People]
• Being on the road in his tour bus must be so hard for Tommy Lee. He says: "Well there's a shower, there's a kitchen, a Pro Tools recording system, a Jaegemeister machine, both formats of Playstation, and Xbox. I don't have a stripper pole - that'd be kind of fun too. I think I'm missing that. But then again, we don't really need a pole. You don't need a pole to strip right? At least on my bus we haven't needed one yet." [NY Magazine]
• "Because I am a mum, my uniform is jeans and trainers and T-shirts. I was raised as a tomboy with boys and I never really feel like myself when I am really dolled up at premieres and showbiz events." - Isla Fisher. [Reuters]

• Lindsay and Sam fought in the D.J. booth at a party on Friday, but made up later in the ladies' room. Supposedly Sam won't leave Linds because "she doesn't have a career without her."

Also, Lindsay made a big show of drinking only Red Bull, but after she left a stash of liquor was found under her table. At another party later that evening sources say Lindsay hid a bottle of Patron under the table. The next morning, Lindsay threw a fit when Delta couldn't find her a first-class seat on an already overbooked flight. Passengers laughed at her when she stomped her feet and said to a friend, "you'd better come and visit me back there in case I die." [Fox News]

• Britney and K-Fed are fighting over an arrangement that would let her take the kids with her on tour, and sources say she'll cancel the tour if they can't work it out. One plan involves Britney paying Kevin more than $4,000 each week she's on tour for reasons unknown. [TMZ]
• Even Miss Cleo couldn't have predicted this: Vivica A. Fox is the new spokesperson for the Psychic Friends Network. [The Life Files]
• Heidi Klum successfully sued an unemployed German butcher because he used a photo of her he found on the Internet in an ad for a local dance. A German socialite and actress, Jenny Elvers Elbertzhagen, stepped in and paid the $2,800 fine for the butcher, who said, "It is nice to think that not all people in the world are like Heidi Klum." [The Daily Mail]
• Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore have apologized for posting a video online complaining about their neighbor's early morning construction work. They blame the incident on their addiction to Twitter. [The Sun]
• But Demi and Ashton still aren't as addicted as Erykah Badu and her partner Jay Electronica, who twittered the birth of their daughter yesterday. [NY Magazine]
• Mandy Moore and Ryan Adams are back on, and he's posted pictures on his blog to prove it. [Perez Hilton]
• Though Kate Moss performed with Pete Doherty's band Babyshambles while they were together, she won't be playing with current boyfriend Jaime Hince's band The Kills. Bandmate Alison Mosshart says that Kate performing with them would be 'totally inappropriate'. [The Daily Mail]
• A-Rod's divorce from his wife Cynthia was finalized on January 12, so he's now free to date whomever he pleases. Not that being married ever stopped him. [TMZ]
• What do Bon Jovi, Shaquille O'Neal, Carl Sagan, and F. Scott Fitzgerald have in common? They were inducted into the New Jersey Hall of Fame today. [AP]
• Emma Roberts is in two indie movies premiering at Sundance, and she hopes Hotel For Dogs will mark the end of her kiddie movie days. But in case that doesn't work out, she's applied to college and wants to major in "creative writing or novel writing." [Movie Hole]
• Does Zooey Deschanel bring bad luck to magazines? She was on the cover of the last issue of Jane and the next to last issue of Domino. [NY Magaine]
• Scott Ruffalo, Mark Ruffalo's younger brother, had trace amounts of cocaine, morphine, and alcohol in his system when he died, but he was not under the influence of drugs when he was shot. Coroners still say his death was a homicide. [People]
• Nikki Blonsky says the airport brawl her family was involved in six months ago with America's Next Top Model contestant Bianca Golden just brought her family closer together. "I don’t even need to defend myself. It’s pretty obvious that it was just a big scam," she says. [People]
• Lil' Kim has been complaining about how she's portrayed in the Biggie biopic Notorious and now Biggie's mom, Voletta Wallace, says the casting was "too dark" for her because Kim is "a white woman trapped in a black woman's body." She added that Kim should "go find herself, go drink a cup of green tea and get a life!" [Perez Hiton]
• "I wasted so many years thinking I wasn't pretty enough and why didn't I have Jessica Lange's body or someone else's legs? What a waste of time. Now I'm enjoying the tatters of what's left and I'm very happy. Part of it is having beautiful strong daughters and hearing them whine about what's wrong with them. I'm like, 'Shut up! You're lovely!'" — Meryl Streep. [The Telegraph]

• Though the Lohans declared a truce less than a month ago, Michael Lohan wrote on his blog today that Samantha Ronson is to blame for Lindsay's weight loss, cutting, and floundering career.

• Michael claims Samantha manipulated Lindsay into leaving Ali in L.A. to accompany her on a trip to Boston and says, "I am asking everyone out their to intervene in every way possible to help Lindsay ... see what SaMANtha is doing to her and how she is destroying her life." [Perez Hilton]
• Still no word on whether Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer have ended their relationship or are planning to get engaged. While several gossip outlets insist they have broken up, Star is sticking to their claim that Mayer is planning to propose on Jen's 40th birthday, and says they spent the night together at Jen's house on Monday. [Star]
• Mary Louise Parker and director Ian Rickson were feuding during rehearsals for the Broadway show Hedda Gabler, which may explain why one critic called it "one of the worst revivals I have ever, ever seen." Parker smashed a glass pitcher on the floor in anger during a performance, and Rickson flew back to England and didn't attend the opening night party. [NY Post]
• Warner Bros. plans to relaunch the Lara Croft franchise, with a completely new back story, new love interests and villians, and an actress that is not Angelina Jolie. Though there is still no writer or director for the film, the Nerds on the Internet have spoken, and they want Megan Fox to have the role. [Yahoo]
• Though there were rumors that David Bowie would revive his Ziggy Stardust character and perform his 1972 album in its entirety at an upcoming concert, Bowie says it's all "poppycock." [UPI]
• Debbie Matenopoulos's estranged husband is suing her for spousal support and claims that she pays for nothing while living in their multi-million dollar L.A. home, but she says it's a lie. "I am very proud to say, not only do I currently pay my own expenses, I also did so for the entire duration of our marriage," says Debbie. [People]
• Lynyrd Skynyrd roadie turned keyboardist Billy Powell died this morning in Jacksonville, Florida. [TMZ]
• There were some clips of Kelly Clarkson's new video for "My Life Would Suck Without You" online but they've been pulled. If you simply must see the new video ASAP, it's previewing on American Idol tonight. [Rolling Stone]
• A woman is claiming she is the love child of Jerry Lewis and a showgirl, and was concieved above New York's Copacabana. Expect to see more hilarious headlines with the phrase "Jerry's kid?" [UPI]
• Bon Jovi is being sued by a former sales manager for the arena football team he owns, the Philadelphia Soul. The man claims he never got paid after the league decided to cancel the 2009 season. [TMZ]
• Ben Affleck didn't immediately raise his hand when he and his He's Just Not That Into You costars were asked who in the group is romantic during an inane interview. But after some mild harassment he admitted, "I'm definitely romantic. I didn't raise my hand because I didn't want to be the guy who started talking about how romantic he was on TV." [People]
• Bob Barker offered to pay $1.5 million to relocate Billy the elephant from his questionable habitat at the L.A. Zoo and send him to an elephant sanctuary, but the zoo has rejected his offer, saying "Billy's home is at the Los Angeles Zoo, not a distant location that is both inaccessible and unaffordable for the working families and schoolchildren of Los Angeles. [L.A. Times]
• Pete Doherty says the secret to getting models like Kate Moss is "Clobber [British slang for clothes], of course. That and sexual magnetism." The drugs probably don't hurt either. [ONTD]
• Leighton Meester is on the cover of the March issue of Seventeen and says she likes bad boys [not unlike one Chuck Bass]. "I don't want to tame anybody. I want them to be dark and bad," she says. [People]
• In this interview Flight of the Concords stars Jemaine Clement and Bret McKenzie explain why the invasion of privacy that comes with being a celebrity is worth it for the free deserts, drinks, and shoes. [CNN]
• Kanye West and Mischa Barton sat together at the Elie Saab fashion shows and talked about the perils of constantly being photographed. Kanye said: “It’s hard to look sexy without looking angry.” [Fashion Week Daily]
• CBS has compiled a slideshow of 86 celebrities with right-wing leanings. The following people are Republicans: Shannen Doherty, Britney Spears, Rick Schroder, Dr. Phil, Nick Lachey, Susan Lucci, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Gloria Estefan, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, James Earl Jones, Adam Sandler, LL Cool J, 50 Cent, and many more! [CBS]

• The new issue of Vanity Fair isn't out yet, but Miley Cyrus is already warning fans that she's mortified of the semi-topless pictures of herself inside. "I took part in a photo shoot that was supposed to be 'artistic' and now, seeing the photographs and reading the story, I feel so embarrassed," she says. A starlet's first shameful shoot is a tale as old as time and a rite of passage, no? [Us Magazine]
  
• The Disney Channel, which airs Miley's hit show, Hannah Montana, says: "Unfortunately... A situation was created to deliberately manipulate a 15-year-old in order to sell magazines." [People]
  
• Ooooh here's a shot. Provocative? It's Annie Leibovitz, of course. She's really been controversial lately. [E!]
  
• Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt did attend the White House Correspondents dinner on Saturday night. They sat at Fortune magazine's table. Other tidbits from that night: Colin Firth couldn't get into the Bloomberg party; Kal Penn (aka Kumar of Harold & Kumar) hung with Salman Rushie and claims he doesn't actually smoke weed; Pete Wentz shouted, "I just want to thank my girlfriend's vagina!" before he started DJing. Stay classy, D.C.! [Page Six]

• And a reader texted us from a cell phone: "Heidi & spencer are sitting behind me @ the whca dinner. Verrry touchy."
• Owen Wilson: Partying in Miami with Richie Sambora and Vince Vaughn. Just like old times! [People]
• Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer: Went on a date in Miami. You know, they might actually be great together. [People]
• Oooh, Sheryl Crow set them up. [Enquirer]
• Joel Madden surprised Nicole Richie with a trip to the California desert for the Coachella music festival, and they brought the baby. Not to the show, to the desert. [People]
• Meanwhile: Paris Hilton and Benji Madden might actually get married. Making Paris and Nicole sisters-in-law. It's surreal, isn't it? [Mirror]
• Amy Winehouse is not getting a divorce from Blake Incarcerated, despite the rumors (which we haven't heard.) [People]
• Amy's out of jail, btw, after being arrested for allegedly slapping a dude. [E!]
• Oh, wait! Amy "bonked" Blake Wood! Also known as Blake II. A source says "you could hear them down the hall." [The Sun]
• And um, this paper claims Amy has a new lover named Alex Haines. Damn, girl. [Mirror]
• Paul McCartney is "writing" a coffee table book which will contain hundreds of photos taken by his late wife Linda. [Mirror]
• Joyce Carol Oates is writing a fictionalized version of the death of pageant girl JonBenet Ramsey. [Page Six]
• Oprah's interview with Tom Cruise — which will air next week — includes her asking him about Scientology, couch-jumping and Matt Lauer. [E!]
• Tom Cruise took Connor and Isabella to see David Beckham play for the L.A. Galaxy on Saturday. No Katie, no Suri. Shocking, I know. Try and collect yourself. [TMZ]
• Ashley Dupre, Eliot Spitzer's call girl, has signed up with a top music manager, but the record labels they've been pitching have turned them down. Oh, and apparently she can't do anything that generates income until she works out a deal regarding potential charges. [Gatecrasher]
• Oh, Christ: A superfan who has seen Spamalot 40 times thinks Clay Aiken is "the savior." As in Jesus. [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which methed-up TV personality tells British pals: "I always know I'm home when I see the Albert Bridge [in London], because I'm just minutes from my drug dealer's place!" [Gatecrasher]
• Fans at a Bon Jovi concert in Sunrise, FL were evacuated due to a bomb threat. Cuz they're wanted, (waaanted) dead or alive. [TMZ]
• Country singer Kenny Chesney hurt his foot at a concert in South Carolina but continued his show. His boot had to be cut off after the show, ouch. [USA Today]
• Ashley Judd's husband, Dario Franchitti, was involved in a NASCAR crash over the weekend. He wasn't injured but his car was smashed up. [Perez Hilton]
• Guy Ritchie hasn't been traveling with Madonna because someone has to stay home with the African kid while the adoption investigation is ongoing. [Perez Hilton]

• Nicole Richie and Joel Madden were seen partying Grammy weekend, so some random source says, "It's almost as if they aren't parents." Kind of a cheap shot. But yeah, the nanny is apparently working overtime. Mom and dad need to party! [Page Six]
  
• Guess who was on the set when Lindsay Lohan posed nude for Bert Stern's Marilyn Monroe-inspired New York magazine shoot? Not momager Dina, but 14-year-old little sis, Ali. Picking up tips on how to behave? [Rush & Molloy]
  
• Dad Jamie tells Britney's new bodyguards not to let her go to a bar or bathroom alone. Also, when she left a restaurant Saturday, she took a cup of coffee with her. [Page Six]
  
• Britney's ongoing custody case reconvenes in court today. First order of business: Who will rep Brit? The firm of Trope and Trope bailed. [E!]
  
• If you find Bindi Irwin vaguely terrifying, wait until you see her doll. [TMZ]

• Meanwhile, Robert Irwin, 4-year-old son of Steve, was bitten by a baby boa constrictor. "He said, 'I hope it wasn't venomous,'" his mom claims. (It wasn't.) [AP]
• Blind item! "The sobriety of which troubled starlet probably isn't being helped by the fact that her uncle deals weed out of the spare room in her mom's house?" [Gatecrasher]
• Jessica Simpson appears in a workout video, but she doesn't want you to see it! Even though she signed a multimillion dollar contract, she changed her mind and refused to give final approval. Speedfit is suing Jess and her dadager. Hey, it can't be any worse than Blonde Ambition. [Page Six]
• Do Michael Bolton's kids hate his fiancée Nicolette Sheridan? Do you care? [Rush & Molloy]
• Desperate Housewives' Marcia Cross's pregnancy: Life-threatening! "My eyesight started going, and I gained 12 pounds in one week," she says. "Both are symptoms of preeclampsia, a complication that is life-threatening for mother and baby. Within 12 hours of being diagnosed - at 35 weeks - I had a C-section." She now has twins, Eden and Savannah. [Rush & Molly]
• The new season of Dancing With The Stars will feature tennis star Moncia Seles, actress Shannon Elizabeth, magician Penn Jillette, actress Marlee Matlin and TV "personality" Adam Carolla, among others. Click for the full list! [People]
• Spencer Pratt on Heidi Montang's new album: "Madonna, eat your heart out. Britney Spears, eat your heart out. I would say we have diamond records coming - they're gonna sell 10-million plus." LOL. [People]
• Scarlett Johansson: "I learned I was a sexual being through David Bowie's songs." Thanks for sharing! [Mirror]
• Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson spent Valentine's evening together? Drinking at a pub? Harry + Hermione = ♥! [Mirror]
• There's a Bon Jovi documentary in the works, people. Who wants to bet it will be called Livin' On A Prayer? [UPI]
• "I feel at great pain when the spotlight is on the death of 4,000 American soldiers, while 600,000 Iraqi deaths are ignored. War is not a movie, it is a tragedy of dead bodies, victims, the disabled, orphans, widows and the displaced." — Sharon Stone. [AP]
• The driver of The Spice Girls' tour bus saw a car driving erratically. He called 911; it turned out to be a carjacking. The Spice Girls (and their driver) save the day! [AP]
• Oh! And The Spice Girls want to play Nelson Mandela's 90th birthday in June. Not that they've been asked. Yet. [Reuters]
• Brooke Shields' mother tells the National Enquirer that she's disappointed in Brooke and liked ex-husband Andre Agassi better than current hubs Chris Henchy. Sigh. [MSNBC]
• Pictures of Jennifer Lopez' twins will be on People in the US, but OK! internationally. [MSNBC]
• Monopoly, kitchen edition! Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia will acquire Emeril Lagasse's media and licensed properties. [Wall Street Journal]
• Mandy Moore's always been afraid of going on vacation alone. But she did it and had a great time, so is now the chair of uPumpItUp.com, a site aimed at helping women balance their "wellness." [Reuters]
• Olivia Newton-John is planning to walk along the Great Wall of China to raise money for a cancer charity. Does part of you wish she would do the walk in tight shiny black pants while singing, "You better shape up/cuz I need a man/And my heart is set on you..." ? [Reuters]

• OMG Bon Jovi is the motherfucking guest judge on Project Runway tonight! [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• What's this? Heidi Klum says that Seal used to design and sew his own clothes?! [Sassybella]
  
• Jones Apparel Group is saying au revoir to the Isabel Toledo-designed Anne Klein Collection despite the fact that fans and critics alike loved it. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Poor Giorgio Armani. A photo of him posing with one of the kids arrested in connection with the murder of a British student in Perugia last week is up on the arrested kid's Facebook page. The rep for Armani insists (and we believe it) that Armani doesn't know the 20-year old facing charges, but merely granted him the photo as a "tourist photo". [WWD, 3rd item]

• And in less detrimental-to-the-brand Armani news, Julia Roberts has collaborated with the Italian fashion house to create a leather bracelet, sales of which will benefit Bono's (Product) Red. [Fashion Week Daily]
• It's another designer collaboration for H&M! Next up is Swedish uber-textile company Marimekko, which is preparing a collection which a company rep says will be "like a vitamin injection." [WWD, sub req'd]
• "We were just like 'Oh my God! Oh my God!' And both of us just stood there, squeezing each other's hands. Agyness was completely mute and unable to speak. Anna asked me for a business card and I didn't have one. I thought, 'Oh my God, I've just ruined my career'." That's designer and Hagyness bff Henry Holland on his first meeting with Anna Wintour, natch. [Vogue UK]
• Why did Hayden Panettiere attend the Victoria's Secret Show? To see the Spice Girls, natch! And why did she want to see the Spice Girls? Because she's a cock-eyed optimist: "I just want to see all of them getting along." Don't hold your breath, hon. [FabSugar]
• Target's sales figures are down. Just don't blame our boy Isaac Mizrahi! [Business Week]
• Tory Burch: Bought one of her own pieces at the Nieman's in Chicago. [WWD, 7th item ]
• Claudia Schiffer is the face of Chanel Resort and based on the first images, we think she's still got it. [Sassybella]

[East Hampton, NY; August 14. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

• Bill Clinton has begun blogging! Just like us! We wonder if he'll do hungover Friday tomorrow too! [Clinton Foundation]
  
• We've always really liked Craig Ferguson. Now we have to like him less: He's dating Sharon Stone. Anna's heart just broke. [The Daily Blabber]
  
• A judge has dismissed Valerie Plame's lawsuit against the White House in regards to leaking her identity while working as an undercover operative for the CIA. [MSNBC]
  
• Go with us on this: Dinosaurs are sorta like Lindsay Lohan. A slow ascent to power in which they knocked out their other, similar, competitors. And then overnight (literally) crashed and burned. [BBC]

• The story about the Chinese dumplings stuffed with cardboard instead of pork? Not so true! And our theories that Bush has it out for China are further confirmed. [CNN]
• Which is maybe because the Chinese economy is booming? [NYT]
• Mijovi is an energy drink. Bon Jovi is a musician. The latter thinks the former stole his name. We laugh at both. [USA Today]
• Do not ever, ever put the words "Kelly Clarkson" and "suicide" in the same sentence, haters. We momentarily stopped breathing. [ABC News]
• Jude Law's a lover not a fighter. Uh yeah, tell us something that his nanny, Sienna Miller, and his ex-wife don't already know. [E!]
• 9 U.S. casualty reports today pending DoD confirmation. [Iraq Coalition Casualties]