boardingschool - Jezebel

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Mean Girls
Britney's Not Crazy. She's Just On Deadline.

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ILikePineapples
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
I don't understand why everyone is hating on this girl so much or saying she's undeserving of sympathy... she's still a child! Sure she cheated, but kids make mistakes. Very often they learn from them. I bet many of us (not all of us, of course) cheated at SOME point in our academic careers and got away with it. This poor girl has parents who are turning it into a lawsuit/national spectacle. She will regret this sooooooo much when she's older and I actually feel kind of bad for her- the cheating was wrong, of course, but the punishment seems too severe for the crime.
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PhillyLass
12/11/08

@ILikePineapples: You're serious? You think suspension is too severe a punishment for cheating? It's a standard and perfectly reasonable penalty-- and even a bit lenient since some schools adhere to zero tolerance policies that would have resulted in immediate expulsion. And you think it's fine that she failed to return to classes once the suspension term was over? And it's fine that she unilaterally decided she should be allowed to create a special 'do it herself' homeschooling program without even bothering to consult the school? Yeah, she's young. And she should have taken her punishment, chalked it up to a learning experience, and gotten on with her life. The lack of sympathy here stems from her complete unwillingness to accept responsibility for her actions. She's not going to learn from a mistake that she refuses to acknowledge as her own.
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lalaland13
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
OK, I read the article and I don't understand why she still wants a diploma from that place. I would have just left and said nothing is worth this shit, plus the price of admission. I'll go to a state school instead, sine hell, a lot of this probably happens at Harvard or whatnot.

Reminds me of the book Prep, really.

And she would be getting a lot more sympathy if she hadn't cheated.
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hostageinhollywood
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
my family and i sued a boarding school like this one. i didn't cheat or anything, but i was being tormented by a group of boys and girls there (really sick Easton Ellis type stuff) and the school did nothing about it. after a few nice rape threats against me, the headmaster said the boys just had a crush on me and boys will be boys. i still picture his face on punching bags.

bullying sucks everywhere, but imagine having to live with them 24/7.

thankfully when i got up the nerve at 15 to tell my folks what was going on they pulled me out and called a lawyer...

my heart goes out to this girl.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@hostageinhollywood: Cheating and being told that you're going to be raped. One is not like the other. These are sooooooooo very far apart on the scale.
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DangerMouse
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
Who thinks they can do off-campus "completion of studies" without arranging it?

Oh. Rich people. The same people who have time and money to sue to say someone else made them not only cheat on a test but then randomly come forth and fess up.

If she doesn't get into college, it might just be because she is cowsuit crazy.
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sportz.star
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
Huh. I get the "I don't like being bullied part" but much like others I don't understand why it forces you to cheat. Blame someone else for your cheating? This is novel.
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glissade
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
"without giving her a chance to offer her side"

This is stupid. All college apps (definitely the common app, at least the majority of others) offer a space where you have to explain any suspensions, crimes committed, etc. My best friend was suspended, wrote a few sentences explaining the circumstances, and still got into Columbia.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@glissade: It depends on what you got suspended for, too.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@glissade: What happens if your suspension takes place after the apps go out, though?

Actually, I know the answer to that. You know that your school will notify the colleges, so you send a letter to Admissions explaining the reason for the suspension, same as if you had time to put it in your apps.
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GoodBadNotEvil
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Exactly- I know a high school valedictorian who was found to have cheated on her final paper. She was stripped of being valedictorian and her future college (I think Cornell) was made aware of the situation, and they rescinded their offer. Harsh?
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ChildBride
12/11/08

@glissade: You're absolutely right. Secondary schools are also REQUIRED to notify colleges if an applicant has been suspended, faced disciplinary issues, etc. MPS had/has an obligation to any schools Bass applied at to inform them of her violation of the honor code, just like they inform the colleges of her grades.
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DangerMouse
12/11/08

@GoodBadNotEvil: I don't think that's harsh. I wonder what the heck SHE was thinking. Once I got into college, I knew better than to screw that up.
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Gretchen is a new kitten mom!
12/11/08

@ChildBride: That seems to be the point here that has been overlooked. Schools ARE required to give colleges any information on suspensions, honor code violations, or any other disciplinary actions IF ASKED. Not all colleges ask - your average state university will not. If you're a student gunning for, oh, say Yale, you bet the question will be asked. Any elite college is going to ask the HS for more than just grades.
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Ratinski
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
I would consider suing all the assholes who made my life between the ages of 6 and 18 a living hell by mocking me constantly and isolating me, but since they're all either unemployed or working dead-end, low-paying, unskilled labor jobs, it would be pointless.

I instead take some joy in the fact that I'm sort of successful and living in New York while they're still living at home and probably always will be. It's one of those things that perks me up when memories of school rear their ugly head.
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Raspberry Swirly
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
If this gets her off without trouble, I am going to march myself into a shoe store and steal a pair. This one time I was bullied, too.
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jgh
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
She wasn't cheating. She just. wasn't aware. of the rules! (South Park)
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pantsless economist...access RESTORED
12/11/08

@jgh: "hoooww cann i reeeachhh theeesee kiiids?"

omg what a great episode.
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Snowbunny
12/11/08

@jgh: "My name is Mr. Cart-men-es, I am going to teach you calculus!"
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Everything MidnightBikeRide does is a balloon.
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
Ridiculous, of course. But is I had spent $43 thousand on a year of high school and it was anything less than mind-blowingly awesome, I would be looking for my money back too.
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Everything MidnightBikeRide does is a balloon.
12/11/08

@MidnightBikeRide: "if", that is
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tiny dancer
12/11/08

@MidnightBikeRide: Mind-blowingly awesome, yeah. I can't even comprehend the tuition. If school costs that much a year, then damn, I'd want to graduate as as a tap-dancing nuclear scientist who flips pancakes over the reactor while saving puppehs and kittehs by telepathy.
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ChildBride
12/11/08

@disco.monkey: Bear in mind, that's the cost of tuition PLUS room and board. It's like college--they're charging you for the classes, but also dorms and food. Day students don't pay that price.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@ChildBride: ...The article says day students pay 33k. As in only 10 grand is room and board. Tuition is $33,000 dollars a year. Insane.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: They have financial aid for the poorer students. All private schools do.
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nellicat
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Your point? That amount of $$ is obscene and to pretend that anyone can go there because there is "financial aid" for poorer students is just ridiculous. Further, I'd bet dollars to donuts it's obvious to every girl there whom the "charity cases" are in every class.
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Mav
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: My brother's school is 35k and goes from k to 12.

Granted its for severly learning disabled kids to help them to learn utilizing small classes and a myriad of different tactics...

but just general school? Yeah I can't see why you would pay 33k for your averaage high school experience. Even with awesome teachers.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: I'm on some financial aid at my ridiculously expensive private university- but that's for my Bachelor's degree! Plus, I was a private school brat for elementary/middle school. That was expensive, but worth it because my parents wanted me to get a Jewish education. This is just a fancy shmancy high school. It's going to be hellish pretty much no matter what or where it is, and if you have enough money to afford to pay even part of that cost for a high school, you probably live in an area with good public schools, since rich neighborhoods tend to have better public schools. I went to a relatively shitty public school and did fine. I just can't see the point in paying that much for high school.
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CollegeCamel
12/11/08

@nellicat: not necessarily. My school cost about $35,000 for day students, $45,000 for boarders. One of my best friends was a boarding student on financial aid, but thanks to the magic of TJ Maxx she rocked 7 jeans, Uggs, North Face fleeces, and Longchamp bags like the rich bitches did.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@Mav: That's a specialized school. I have no problem with spending money on specialized schools. My parents did, K-8 for me. Nearly 20k a year for Jewish Day School, and because of that I have a decent knowledge of Jewish history and tradition, and have been able to read and write in a language with non-Roman characters since 1st grade (Hebrew, of course). That's different then just high school- if you want college prep, take AP or IB for free at a public school!
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e.b.
12/11/08

@nellicat: and that they get mocked for it.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: Social connections and name prestige might be the point of paying so much for school.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: ...Aka, fulfilling the expectations of legacies for purposes of applying to and getting into brand name universities? I have major issues with that whole concept. Social connections while in high school? If you're talking about making friends, I'm a firm believer that you should be exposed to people of all economic classes while you're young. Snobberific private schools don't allow that. And if you're talking networking- my god, who needs to network when they're 15 years old?

As for name prestige, my public high school has name prestige because Disney made a movie about our desegregation. 'Remember the Titans', anyone? That doesn't make it a better school than any other.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: They're probably becoming friends with people who will own their parents companies in the near future.
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Mav
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: Yeah I started that comment before I read the whole article. I was thinking maybe it was specialised...

Then finished reading the article and just didn't go back.

Indeed, I don't see the point of paying so much just for private institutions if you are in an area where public is just as good. Fairfax county has some good schools so I don't see the point in private unless for specific mental or religious reasons.

Now DC? Yeah okay. Their schools aren't all that great (though are trying).
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: ...That's called networking, sweetheart. Making connections with people for the purposes of business and furthering your career. Just because someone will one day own their parent's company does not mean that they will a) expand your views as a person or b) be a particularly good friend. They will be what certain parents would call the 'right' kind of friends- the ones who are in the 'right' social and economic class.
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Mav
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: HA FAIRFAX COUNTY GRADUATES REPRESENT
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@Mav: HA not Fairfax county! No way. City of Alexandria is NOT Fairfax county.
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Mav
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: CURSES! I just remember seeing the banner for the titans in our gym. I sort of have forgotten what all the schools are in the system...

I went to Madison. We are also in the movie. But having our butts whooped. And having a car smashed...
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G Gordon Liddy
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Ha yes, "prestige" goes so far in the real world. Just like in the studies that show Ivy league grads make the same as us poor public school urchins.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@G Gordon Liddy: Seriously. I go to a lesser known but still somewhat prestigious private university. And I could have done just as well with a degree from a state school- especially since I'm from Virginia, where our best state schools are ranked along side some very 'prestigious' private schools. My family and I are spending a bazillion dollars on my education because I am happy here.
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G Gordon Liddy
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: Its one of the sisters schools right? I'm not stalking you, I just remember waaay to many details about commenters on here. Do you like it b/c is has its own culture? I'm about to graduate from a very big urban public school with no "school identity" so small private schools are sort of another country to me.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@G Gordon Liddy: Brandeis University. Definitely has it's own culture, large Jewish population, strong departments in many of the fields I'm interested in, near a city, not a big party school (but people still drink), etc. I'm happier here than I've ever been in my life. To me, that's a good reason to spend the big bucks, you know?
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cwisto moweina has got yer goat
12/11/08

@e.b.: It's their own fault for letting people know they're one of the poors. What did they expect?
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PhillyLass
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: c)does not mean they will manage the company with skill and success. Sooner or later even legacies have to stand on their own two feet. And their lack of awareness about the real world generally results in epic failure. See: George W. Bush.
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Jessi Ramsey
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
I was once made fun of from a girl on rival lacrosse team in high school for being the only black girl on my team. It caused me to "uncharacteristically" knock that bitch flat on ass repeatedly. I was suspended from the team and just didn't return at the end of the suspension thus ended any career I could of had. Clearly this is grounds to sue...someone. I'm not sure who but I'm obviously my case is solid.
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Jessi Ramsey
12/11/08

@Jessi Ramsey: it's obvious* my case is solid.

But at least I aimed my anger at the chick who did me wrong. Not do something completely unrelated and cheat on a test.
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PrettyNotPretty
12/11/08

@Jessi Ramsey: The only time I've ever hit anyone was when a girl called me a derogatory name for being Jewish, and I knocked her out.

I didn't ruin a lacrosse career though. I'm just no longer allowed in Croce's of Key West...

I hope the other team suspended the bitch who made fun of you, but for some reason I'm doubting it.
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Antrack
12/11/08

@Jessi Ramsey: I had a girl on a rival lacrosse team grab my cooch so she could get a ground ball. That caused me to stop running and stand with my mouth open for a second. For a second!
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CollegeCamel
12/11/08

@Jessi Ramsey: did you knock her down in an obvious way or a stealthy I'm-just-playing-lacrosse way? Because I knocked over so many bitches playing lacrosse and never got kicked off a team. Even after I broke a girl's wrist. Got a lot of yellow cards though...
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Jessi Ramsey
12/11/08

@CollegeCamel: Completely obvious. trust. I wasn't kicked off though, I just didn't come back after my suspension was up.
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mepo - Robert Cornhole invented it
12/12/08

@Antrack: That made me laugh so hard. I hope that doesn't make me a bully.
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TheUptightMidwesterner
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
This is ridiculous. Pardon the sarcasm, but..

I am sure that the girls who really get bullied at the poor old public schools will appreciate that this fine woman stood up and said "no more".

I am sure that the girls who get bullied at school with
Physical assaults before, after, and enroute to school.
Getting groped by boys in the halls or bus.
Getting called pig all the time or having ham slices stuck on their locker.
Having the police called out to her house because a well-meaning "friend" called police to say she was trying to kill herself..
Having rumors spread about them
Getting called racist or demeaning names DAILY
Getting your house spray painted

Yeah- ALL these victims of bullying are gonna think of this young woman who was forced to cheat on an art test and not get into Yale and thank her.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@TheUptightMidwesterner: God, I'm so glad I didn't go to public school. That sounds horrible.
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Mafalda para Presidente
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Yeah, I hear all public schools are like that.

/sarcasm.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@Mafalda para Presidente: Eh, in my single-sex high school no one really got bullied. Except for this weird white girl who was born addicted to heroin and crack. She told everyone that and she expected not to be teased. Bah!
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e.b.
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Seriously?! She expected to be treated like a human being. OMG how ridiculous!.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Doubt it. Unless your school was tiny, and I mean tiny, I mean you could count every student on your fingers and toes tiny, there were things going on that you weren't aware of. Every school has a bullying problem. Every school has kids who don't fit it. That's life.

My high school, a pretty normal racial mixed and then segregated by academic track kind of public school, had plenty of bullying of all sorts. You deal.

Then again, if my high school had a tuition as high as my college tuition, I might think differently about this case. At 43 grand a year, that school better not fuck up my college admissions over anything.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: My school only had 280 people in it. My graduating class had 75 people in it. So, it really was that small.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: I meant literally when I said counting on your fingers and toes. At 280 people, there are plenty of people who you did not know well enough to know whether they were being bullied, even if you knew all 280 people by name.
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Mafalda para Presidente
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Well, at my double-sex school with 1000 people in it, I never knew of anyone being bullied. There was normal teenager bitchery, but I've encountered that in every public or private school I've ever attended.

I'm not sure you got the jist of my sarcasm.
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KittyKittyCat
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: That's not really small. Lots of schools out where I come from have 10 or less students in their graduating class and are lucky to have 70 people in the whole high school. 280 people is probably almost a 3A high school.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@e.b.: You can't tell people that and not expect to be teased mercilessly and cruelly. You really can't. Crude but true.
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TheUptightMidwesterner
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: I was making the point that this is real abuse that people -KIDS- have suffered at the hands of their classmates. It happens at all kinds of schools. These are examples that my friends who are teachers and police liason officers have given me.

They are the ones who should be suing.
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G Gordon Liddy
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: What the fuck does being born addicted to heroin warrant teasing? Is it funny?
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@G Gordon Liddy: I'm too biased to comment on that freely. Let's just say that she looked and acted strange. No one really had much sympathy for her. At all. Not even the teachers which was really sad. Some of them even used to laugh to her face and make crappy remarks.
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Mav
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Wow. Yeah. So her fault for being born addicted. I totes see where its hilarious and she should be mocked for it.

/sarcasm
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nellicat
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Perhaps you are doing it on purpose, but you are coming across as extremely obnoxious. So . . . if a child or teen looks and acts strange, then bullying is acceptable? If a person is annoying you, it's okay to pile on? Are you related to Lori Drew, by any chance?
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CollegeCamel
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: I went to an all-girls school with only 400 students combined in middle and high school, but we still had a gang of 6th graders that pushed girls into the elevator and beat them up.
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G Gordon Liddy
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: I've worked with children that have been born addicted to drugs. Yes, it fucks them up and they act "strange" just like Autistic children act "strange". It takes a lot of intense special education classes and therapy to have them function normally. Its nothing to laugh at, or to treat with derision. Was she adopted?
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@nellicat: It isn't acceptable. Never said it was. I was just stating why she was bullied. If she had said nothing of her birth and aforementioned consequence I sincerely doubt that she would have been teased.
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CollegeBookworm
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: You doubt she would have been teased... Even though "she looked and acted strange"?

Right. I'm sure that people wouldn't find ways to tease someone who stood out regardless.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@G Gordon Liddy: She lived with her grandmother who was a psychologist. Her mother was still in rehab to get off the drugs but she visited her often. She did fairly well in my opinion. She studied abroad in England last year and is a writer. I think, regardless of the teasing, she turned out better than half the people in our class.
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nellicat
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Bullshit. You obviously were one of the ones piling on and are looking for ways to rationalize it. Your post that she simply "couldn't" make a statement like that and not get teased = it wasn't really your fault for teasing her, it was hers for asking for it. Your insistence that she "looked and acted wierd" is nothing but an attempt at rationalization.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@nellicat: I never said I wasn't one of the one's that teased her because I was. I mostly avoided her at every cost which was pretty easy for me. That is all.
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e.b.
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: Well I'm glad I didn't go to a tiny single-sex high school where "no one really got bullied" because that sounds horrible.
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@e.b.: It was high school. I was horrible little thing but, hey, it's been nearly four years, and I grew out of it. At least I acknowledge my behavior unlike so many other people who go on blissfully unaware on how they've treated other people.
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cwisto moweina has got yer goat
12/11/08

@I_Love_AFI: It probably was horrible and no "little thing" to her. Four years isn't really that long of a time and your comments about the whole situation lead me, and probably many others, to believe that you haven't grown out of it because you kinda failed to acknowledge your behavior and instead blamed the victim for making her predicament known.

Ugh, your whole story makes me feel ill.
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nellicat
12/11/08

@cwistomoweina has got yer goat: Me, too. Does it not occur to her that a girl with a drug addicted mother who lives with her grandma and is teased by everyone, including teachers, really doesn't need more shit added to her life?
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PhillyLass
12/11/08

@CollegeBookworm: She fucked up her college admissions all by her cheating self.
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LovelyHue
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
Uhhh...as someone who was bullied A LOT (okay, more in elementary school than high school, I admit) - WTF?

I think it's kind of cool to sue someone over emotional damages for being bullied. But I don't see the relation to the test. At. All.
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Cardbross
12/11/08

@LovelyHue: Her suit most likely alleges Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress, which requires that the defendant have committed some action that is "offensive to all sense of decency." She also has to show some sort of damage for which she is seeking redress.

She (well most likely her lawyer, but still) is using the test as a means to a) make the infliction of emotional distress seem more flagrant by tying it into the destruction of her academic career, and b) create a case for damages in the form of lost potential wages.
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PhillyLass
12/11/08

@Shidobu: c) looking for a scapegoat to blame for fucking up her chances of getting into an elite college.
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hfree
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
WWJOD? (What What Jackie O Do?)
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prestocaro fears the culling
12/11/08

In reply to Mean Girls
As a self-professed cheater, the first rule of cheating is: you were never cheating.

Then keep in mind a tip from Auntie Wanda (Sykes): You got to stick with your lie.
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BeckySharper
12/11/08

@prestocaro: "If we went to war on the lie, then we fight on the lie."--Slim Charles
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Evie Havok
12/11/08

@prestocaro: That was a stupid thing to admit to. If you do cheat stick to your story and never let up. They can't prove anything otherwise unless you copied verbatim.
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Snowbunny
12/11/08

@prestocaro: Amen. You NEVER confess to cheating! I don't care if somebody is pumping your head full of Barney in Guantanemo Bay. You weren't cheating. You were gazing thoughtfully into thin air OR your forgot where the clock was OR somebody you don't know put that on the inner label of your water bottle.

You confess to cheating on one test your entire academic career is destroyed. Idiot.
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Ultraprison!
12/12/08

@prestocaro: It's like Seinfeld. "It's not a lie... if you believe it." Wise words from George Costanza.
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