Pervert Birds Steal Swimmers' Underwear to Build Nest Of Filth and Sin
If you ever thought that birds could be trusted, you need to think again. While it’s long been known that birds are brazen perverts who will line their nests with any number of sexual objects, some Scottish birds have gone far too far—they’ve stolen the underwear from some innocent skinny-dippers just trying to…
Audubon Society Slams 'Sad Ravings' of 'Consumerist' Jonathan Franzen
When he isn’t sharing his thoughts about the Internet with the Internet, bestselling author Jonathan Franzen is a birder. He recently wrote a long essay speculating that the looming threat of global climate change is encouraging us to abandon more concrete (but smaller-scale) bird-related conservation efforts. He…
Foie Gras Is For Assholes
Yesterday, a federal judge overturned the state of California's ban on foie gras. Great news, for assholes.
Drunk Birds Sing Drunkenly, Science Says
A new study has found that when you get zebra finches totally wasted, they become noticeably worse at singing. They probably think they sound awesome, though. Then they probably want to fly somewhere to get little bird-sized burritos before crying into a bird-sized phone to some ex-birdfriend, before spending the rest…
New York Proposes Eliminating All the Shitty State Swans
The State of New York might launch a huge offensive against a nasty invasive species that tears up underwater vegetation, threatens passenger jets, and (occasionally) attacks people with the raw, avian vindictiveness of an avenging archangel. Unfortunately for the State of New York and its beleaguered PR interns, that…
Bloodthirsty Housecat Attacks Televised Birds
By now, we all probably know that cats are murdering psychopaths bent on torturing all manner of small rodents, insects, and birds to death. Therefore, faced with an absence of innocent souls to send off to hell, cats will live out their blood fantasies through television. This cat in particular was observed…

