Posts Tagged “
Bill O'reilly
”Did Hillary's Appearance On O'Reilly Actually Make Me Like Her More?
Fox is the only news channel that gets any audio on my cable box. This is something, like the interminable nature of this campaign, I generally regard as a negative. But yesterday I had a revelation. See, Hillary Clinton just went on Bill O'Reilly, and when they aren't rerunning clips of the really boring interview, the Fox News talking heads are creaming their pants over how well she's held up, what a "fighter" she is, etc. And it hit me: has Hillary Clinton's stubborn refusal to drop out maybe been good for America? All the phony, cynical and self-serving praise she's had heaped upon her pantsuited self from Rush and Ann and the Weekly Standard and the "Fair And Balanced" regime has started, ever so gradually, to convert into something genuine: respect. Anyway, The Indianapolis Star just endorsed Hillary, a Baptist minister got ushered out by Secret Service for asking John McCain if he really called his wife a "cunt", and Barack Obama drank shit beer at a VFW and the whole thing has lasted so long it's starting to feel like life itself, and Megan and I decided to look at it on the beer-glass half-full side today. More »Good Morning, Voters! I'm Calling On Behalf Of "Women Voices." If You Are Confused, My Mission Is Accomplished!
In which we adopt the persona of Women's Voices. Women Vote robocaller and misinformation chief Lamont Williams, if he only had a voice.
Yo voters, this is Lamont, calling because you need to register to vote. Oh really? You already registered? But did you ever receive the packet? Did you send in the detailed form? Because we explicitly stated on every packet that you were required to send in the form. All right, to be sure, you are not required to send in the form to vote, per se, but to be registered. And you need to register! To vote. Women's Voices, Women Vote has even kindly provided me with some dates and deadlines, although they are mostly, to be honest with you sisters, completely arbitrary and false and I suspect only generated to elicit the sort of mass confusion popularized by Karl Rove, but I'm a cynic. Five years after Bush said so, I also don't believe, ladies, that the Mission was actually Accomplished, or that Saddam Hussein orchestrated September 11, or that Guantanamo is really such a decent place to retire. And as far as I know, Barack Obama isn't Muslim and the United States did not invent AIDS, but maybe I am paying too much attention to these two winos named Moe and Megan... More »Why Is Mariah So Shady?
- Did Mariah Carey have an eye job or something? She won't walk down the red carpet without her sunglasses. If so, it's probably not her first procedure; her nose and boobs seem to have changed in the past few years. [Page Six]
- Also: Mariah's been wearing a giant ring that gossipers want you to think is engagement-esque. And she's been hanging with Nick Cannon. [People]
- David Bowie and Iman's 7-year-old daughter, Alexandria, listens to Hilary Duff songs, at which point "David just leaves the room," Iman says. "He thinks she should be listening to underground music." [ONTD]
Your Period Could Save Your Life; Swedish Prisoner Gifts Guards With Wooden Willies
• Scientists have found stem cells in menstrual blood. • And a new company, C'elle, is already offering women period blood storage starting at just $99/year! • Joan Benoit Samuelson, "the matriarch of marathons," is running Olympic trials in Boston for fun. • Amy Poehler eats Honey Nut Cheerios because of The Wire• An ex-prisoner in Sweden was fined after he gave parting gifts of wooden dicks to female guards. • More from Sweden: a Muslim woman won a discrimination case after she was told to vacate a bus for wearing a niqab scarf. • The first born are usually the smartest. • The Supreme Court will consider using the death penalty for child rape. • Media Matters calls Bill O'Reilly a big ol' homophobe.
news roundup
BREAKING OMG: Did John McCain Bone Blonde Lobbyist?!
- Maybe no.. But he would have, if loyal advisers had not protected him from himself! Loyal advisers who are now telling the Times all about it? (Loyal advisers who wish he had left the GOP? Seems poss!) Vicki Iseman. A youthful-looking 40. Pretty! Deny deny deny. Gary Hart was his groomsman, you know! The "miracle" Huckabee's been waiting for? [NYT]
- Let's be clear, Bill O'Reilly doesn't want to "lynch" Michelle Obama. Not until he has enough "evidence." He will "track it down." [Media Matters]
- Tucker Carlson just said he thinks she's got a "chip on her shoulder." Not that there's anythign wrong with that.
- All she was talking about was the record turnout! [CBS News]
- And let's go back to the chip thing for a sec. As Chris Matthews so helpfully pointed out this morning, slavery was in the Constitution. She grew up bound and determined to succeed, flung herself into an Ivy League bastion of entrenched privilege and classism and survived. Better than can be said for some of us but whatevs. [WSJ]
dirt bag
Blake Overdoses; Amy Loses WeaveHive
- Did Amy Winehouse's husband, Blake Fielder-Civil, overdose on heroin in jail? He was reportedly found passed out in his cell and rushed to the prison hospital. [TMZ]
- Amy went out in London and "left a pair of boob enhancers, like chicken cutlet things to push up your boobs, and some hair extensions in the toilet." Whoops! And hey, what was she doing in there, anyway, that she needed to ditch her cutlets and hair? [Page Six]
- This report claims that Blake traded signed pictures of Amy for drugs. [The Sun]
- Post-overdose Blake has been banned from all contact with the outside world. That means no visitors. Amy is going to freak the fuck out. [Perez Hilton]
- Diva alert! There's an empty private room with a luxurious brown leather couch in North Shore University Hospital on Long Island, patiently awaiting for Jennifer Lopez to give birth. "No one's even allowed in there until she gets here. It's just sitting there for her," says a source. [Page Six]
- After she gives birth, People magazine will probably pay J. Lo and Marc Anthony between $4 million and $6 million for photos of the twins. [Ad Age]
end of days
Jordin Sparks Loves Herself Just The Way She Is
- American Idol winner Jordin loves her curves. [People]
- Anne Heche and her hubby have seemingly regained their sanity. [People]
- Big Brother/Big Government are spying on our cats. [BoingBoing]
- Ponds paid for massive product placement in the new, reportedly-awful series The Starter Wife. [Slate]
- Well it's about fucking time. [BBC]
news at 10
News At 10: Paula Zahn "Really" Hates Animals
- Hawk-evictor and CNN anchor Paula Zahn's new boyfriend is chairman of a company that operates animal-processing factory farms. [NYDN]
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