Baseball Star's Holiday Safety Tip: 'Ladies, Let Ur Man Drive'

Today, I took a break from gestating male heirs/ slaving over a hot stove/ piping down and letting the men talk to check this website called "Twitter," where a famous base-ball player named David Price had some great Thanksgiving travel tips for ladies: let your man drive! Especially in dangerous weather! Men, you see,… » 11/26/13 3:40pm 11/26/13 3:40pm

Baby Falls Out of Window, Is Caught by Joe Torre's Daughter

Today in hahahahdskjhksdghsdgfkdshfskdhfjsfhwghhggjh, Cristina Torre — a 44-year-old New Yorker who just happens to be the daughter of legendary MLB manager and catcher Joe Torre (THE CATCHER PART IS IMPORTANT LATER)—was walking down the street in Brooklyn when she saw a 1-year-old baby fall from a second-story fire… » 6/20/13 3:20pm 6/20/13 3:20pm

Lil Wayne Sang 'Take Me Out to the Ball Game' and We Were Like 'Hell…

I don't think that I am being simplistic when I say that love is one of the most important feelings that a human being can experience, so please go forward in good faith knowing that I am not being flippant or irresponsible with what I'm about to say. I fell in love last night. I know, I know! We never thought it would … » 10/22/12 3:40pm 10/22/12 3:40pm

Major League Baseball's Dress Code Actually More of a Slut Ban

Concerned with an uptick journalistic sartorial sloppiness, before the 2012 baseball season began, a mixed gender panel of experts crafted a new dress code for reporters who talk to players in Major League locker rooms. This sounds like a pretty good idea on its surface — after all, who doesn't love rules about sleeve… » 10/17/12 2:50pm 10/17/12 2:50pm

Insulting Baseball Is Like Insulting All Fathers Everywhere

In case you people thought I've given up on pursuing baseball fandom, THINK AGAIN. I am not a dumb baby quitter! I will conquer baseball! What happened is that I moved. From L.A. to Seattle. And moving is stressful and expensive, which means I don't have my TV set up yet and it's hard to watch baseball without a TV.… » 5/28/12 3:45pm 5/28/12 3:45pm

Catholic High School Throws a Tantrum Over Facing a Girl in Arizona…

Since the State of Arizona went ahead and ruined women's healthcare, a fundamentalist Catholic high school in Phoenix figured it'd go ahead and ruin America's pastime before the summer kicked into high gear, you know, just in case any ladies were thinking about enjoying the sport. » 5/11/12 2:10pm 5/11/12 2:10pm

Sports Blogger Who Posted Upskirt Pic of Female Fan Doesn't Get Why…

Last night, when a female fan attending the Braves/Phillies game unwittingly flashed her panties at TV cameras, it was only a matter of time before some douchebag on the internet posted a still of the shot and acted like they were King Awesome, Vagina Destroyer. And this morning, a popular Philadelphia sports blogger… » 5/02/12 2:20pm 5/02/12 2:20pm

Atlanta Braves Concerned That Pixar's Brave Will Confuse Morons

When you first heard that Pixar is releasing a film called Brave you were probably surprised to learn that it's about a feisty Scottish girl, not one of the Atlanta Braves. Now it's emerged that the Atlanta National League Baseball Club, which owns the team, has been working for months to save other moviegoers from… » 12/20/11 9:30am 12/20/11 9:30am

The Politics Of Baseball's Little Pink Backpacks

In a new hazing ritual, rookie relief pitchers are forced to carry gear and snacks for the rest of the bullpen in colorful backpacks meant for little girls. It's hard not to snicker at the image of a top athlete carrying a little cartoon pack, but the tradition also says something about gender politics and the culture… » 9/01/11 10:10am 9/01/11 10:10am