barbara - Jezebel

posts about #barbara more →
Beaches Blooper Reel
The Female Spiral Of Shame In Post-War Suburbia
The View's New "Star": Just As Fucking Annoying As The Last One

Your version of Internet Explorer is not supported. Please upgrade to the most recent version in order to view comments.

Dsmvwl Admin Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×

TexasCrude
05/06/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
That's it. I'm changing my screenname to Hand-WalkingQueer.
Reply

TexasCrude was starred TexasCrude was unstarred

rocknrollunicorn
05/06/09

@Hand-Walking Queer (texascrude): Guess who got the part in the new Falcon Player's production?

Certainly not THE HAND-WALKING QUEER!
Reply

rocknrollunicorn was starred rocknrollunicorn was unstarred

TexasCrude
05/06/09

@rocknrollunicorn: Damn that Iris Myandowski!
Reply

TexasCrude was starred TexasCrude was unstarred

tankearae
05/05/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
One of the worst movies ever made.

And I can't decide who I dislike more, Bette Midler or Barbara Hershey and her collagen injections.
Reply

tankearae was starred tankearae was unstarred

spryte
05/05/09

@tankearae: Well you better hurry up and make a choice, because I'm sure they're both dying to know!!!

Jeez. Seriously?
Reply

spryte was starred spryte was unstarred

jessacecilia
05/05/09

@tankearae:

Woooooow. I'm not really a big movie fan but I know enough to know that this a classic. They just don't make movies like Beaches anymore. I've never heard of anyone even disliking this movie, let alone calling it one of the worst movies ever made!

I made my best friend watch it for the first time about a month ago. She's Australian and I'm American, so the majority of our friendship is spent apart. We both cried for the entire last 1/4th of the movie.

My only complaint is the actress they had for Victoria..ew. How can you hate this movie?!?!?!?
Reply

jessacecilia was starred jessacecilia was unstarred

rocknrollunicorn
05/06/09

@jessacecilia: I can see not liking it if you dislike Bette Midle (what?!) or super-sentimental films. Or are not a lady, I guess. Or hate friends, New York, the '70s and '80s and the beach.

Calling it "one of the worst movies ever made," however, means either you're prone to hyperbole or you've only seen a handful of movies and they were pretty good ones.
Reply

rocknrollunicorn was starred rocknrollunicorn was unstarred

Kate.the.Great
05/05/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
I love love love Beaches! I need to own this immediately!

It's the only movie that make me cry EVERY time I watch it.
Reply

Kate.the.Great was starred Kate.the.Great was unstarred

queenieinmanhattan
05/05/09

@Kate.the.Great: For me, that movie is Steel Magnolias. Nothing turns on the waterworks like it does. Anytime I need a good cry but can't quite get there, it does the trick.
Reply

queenieinmanhattan was starred

dreamweave
05/05/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
Please, God, let there be one of these for Terms of Endearment to pull me out of the fetal position after I lose my mind and put myself through that movie again.

LOVE THIS!
Reply

dreamweave was starred dreamweave was unstarred

rocknrollunicorn
05/05/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
That IS the best gift ever! Fuck, I'm jealous. Seriously I think I could recite this movie in my sleep, but it never gets old.

I really wanted B. Hershey to say, "Wait, did I say wrench? I mean hammer and nails." after that picture fell off the wall, though.
Reply

rocknrollunicorn was starred rocknrollunicorn was unstarred

poires et poireaux
05/05/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
That cell phone is all sorts of amazing.
Reply

poires et poireaux was starred

Penny
05/05/09

@poires, poireaux, et poissons: You could do some damage with that thing.
Reply

Penny was starred Penny was unstarred

queenieinmanhattan
05/05/09

@poires, poireaux, et poissons: I don't think that's even a cell - I'm pretty sure it's just a cordless. Yes, once upon a time, those had retractable antennae, too. Ah, the 80s. :-)
Reply

queenieinmanhattan was starred

Penny
05/05/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
"What the fuck am I saying?!"

I swear, with as often as I sprinkle obscenities into my daily speech, I should live in a blooper reel.

I LOVE THIS.
Reply

Penny was starred Penny was unstarred

perruchon
05/05/09

@Penny: My favorite was "I hate my life", complete with sad Charlie Brown shuffle off-screen. That's pretty much exactly how I react when I stuff things up.
Reply

perruchon was starred perruchon was unstarred

rocknrollunicorn
05/05/09

@perruchon: Yet she does it so gracefully. I sound way more pathetic.
Reply

rocknrollunicorn was starred rocknrollunicorn was unstarred

Whiskey and Popcorn
05/05/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
Hand Walking Queer? Well according to some, as a bisexual all I would be doing is sitting on the fence :-P
Reply

Lirael
05/05/09

In reply to Beaches Blooper Reel
The narrator's monotone dialogue alone makes this gold
Reply

Lirael was starred Lirael was unstarred

The Queen of No
05/05/09

@Lirael: That's Bill Murray!
Reply

The Queen of No was starred The Queen of No was unstarred

hello.kitty
02/07/09

In reply to The Female Spiral Of Shame In Post-War Suburbia
Poor Babs, she just needs a dose of Ritalin--will smooth out the executive functioning in a snap!
Reply

hello.kitty was starred hello.kitty was unstarred

tscheese
02/06/09

In reply to The Female Spiral Of Shame In Post-War Suburbia
I'm a Barbara-Helen. I know exactly where every single damn thing is in my apartment. I could find it in minutes. I know where my clean clothes are. I could put together three or four presentable, clean, sharp outfits in five minutes if you asked me. My messenger bag is ready to go--wallet, iphone, keys, a little makeup bag, water bottle, e-books stored on the iphone for long waits or commutes, and I can even pack up a snack of healthy fruit in a second or two.

The thing is, though, that everything is on the floor. Like, everything. I don't have time to hang up every last fucking thing, and I don't care--none of my clothes are made of wrinkly fussy stuff. I don't care about my hairbrush because I have short DIY butch hair, and I don't care about my fingernails because I just mess with them when no one is looking. I have a huge pile of dirty socks just sitting where I can find them (makes laundry day easier.) I have an empty soda can on my desk. OBVIOUSLY THIS MAKES ME A GODAWFUL HUMAN.

Jesus. I'm clean, dressed, on-time, well-spoken, I eat lots of fresh fruits and veggies, and I get up when my alarm goes off. I can't be goddamn Hints from Heloise 24/7. Just let me have my floodrobe and lackadaisical attitude towards dusting and vacuuming, all right?
Reply

tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred

lautaylo
02/07/09

@tscheese: Enjoy the freedom that comes with living alone. That used to be my modus operandi until cohabitation. The last 5 years have taught me that a) things don't stay where I put them if someone else lives here and b) despite my clear ability to locate any given item in the jungle of my dwelling, my partner may not have the same powers and slowly go insane from the confusion.

There's been some compromise, that's for sure, and it's all good now. But here's my point: SAVOR IT, BARBARA. These are the good old days.
Reply

lautaylo was starred lautaylo was unstarred

tscheese
02/07/09

@lautaylo: I cohabitated for four years with someone who was far, far, far more disorganized than I. I just kind of let my slightly-organized chaos exist on top of his utter chaos.

I live alone now and it is the sweetest freedom ever.
Reply

tscheese was starred tscheese was unstarred

RobertaFisk
02/06/09

In reply to The Female Spiral Of Shame In Post-War Suburbia
I watched this movie and then straightened up the house, put a veggie lasagna in the oven, and worked on my thesis. Then I said "30 minutes of work - time for a Jezebel break!" Some bad habits just aren't worth breaking.
Reply

RobertaFisk was starred RobertaFisk was unstarred

mbot says Spock yeah!
02/06/09

In reply to The Female Spiral Of Shame In Post-War Suburbia
I am really wishing I had a pretty vanity table now.
Reply

Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini
02/06/09

In reply to The Female Spiral Of Shame In Post-War Suburbia
Does it make me a square that I more like Helen than Barbara? Do I have to turn in my Jezebel card because I like everything being neat, clean, and tidy? I can't live without my planner book.
Reply

DixieCaverns
02/06/09

@Beets.Go.On: Well, do you do it 'cause it works for you, or do you do it because it is "approved by custom" and 'cause it'll get you a husband quicker?

I'm assuming your answer will be the former. Otherwise, yeah, hand over the card, Missy.
Reply

DixieCaverns was starred DixieCaverns was unstarred

Beets.Go.On is the Fat Yogini
02/06/09

@DixieCaverns: I'm pretty sure my obsession with being organized has been a general negative in the world of men, though Mr. Beets is slowly coming over to the dark side.

Though I do use Proactiv because having a bad complexion IS looked down by society, so there you go.
Reply

HidingInCanada
02/06/09

In reply to The Female Spiral Of Shame In Post-War Suburbia
Fuck it man, I wish I was a Helen.
Reply

HidingInCanada was starred HidingInCanada was unstarred

mbot says Spock yeah!
02/06/09

@HidingInCanada: Me too!
Reply

Earlier discussions Other discussions Show all discussions Show featured discussions only Start a new discussion

#barbara

Jezebel

SUBSCRIBE TO Jezebel

Beaches Blooper Reel

The Female Spiral Of Shame In Post-War Suburbia

The View's New "Star": Just As Fucking Annoying As The Last One

Login

Reset Password

Register

Submit Your Comment