NYPD Is Looking to I.D. This Guy Who Rode the Subway With His Balls Out
NYPD is investigating an incident involving a man who had his testicles dangling on a subway seat.
The Results of This Global Scrotal Beauty Pageant Are Terrible and Glorious
Click this link if you want to see some very NSFW photos of balls from all over the world!
Pig Testicle Mutilating Woman to Deliver State of the Union Response
Iowa junior Senator Joni Ernst, who rose to national prominence by working a record number of castration double entendres into an early campaign ad (Respect!), will be delivering the GOP's State of the Union rebuttal. This is fucking amazing news.
Men's Rights Group Demands Their Balls Be Allowed to Breathe on Buses
A recent campaign to stop the phenomenon known as "manspreading" on New York's transportation system has men's rights organizations in a tizzy, especially in Canada, where one "advocacy group" is demanding men be allowed to spread their legs as far and wide as they want to to avoid a pain more awful than anything…
Want to Sit and Drink in The Shower? Prepare to Lose Your Genitals
This literally sounds like it came directly from SAW 45 3D. It is that horrifying.
The Amazing True Story Of My Exploding Balls
The hardest part was shaving my balls. Before you go in for your vasectomy, the literature says, you should hop in the shower and shave all the hair off the surgical area. I called the office the day before surgery to confirm that I had to do this.
The MTA Will Finally Chastise Men Whose Balls Need Three Seats
I have testicles, they're fairly sizeable (physically, not metaphorically), and they don't need a separate seat on the subway. In fact, no matter how big someone's balls are (again, speaking from a purely physical standpoint), they will never need an extra seat. Yet some men continue to sit on the train as though they…
How to Kick a Guy in the Balls: An Illustrated Guide
The groin shot: an attack so devastating that men have banned it from virtually every contact sport they engage in. Let's learn how to do it.
Mind-Blowing Facts Men Don't Know About Women Is Blowing My Mind
While it's safe to say we should all have a working knowledge of how the human body works, it's also quite obvious that definitions of what constitutes common knowledge vary widely, and nowhere is this often truer than when it comes to what we know about the opposite sex, and vice versa.
Adults Are Laughably Bad at Identifying Human Reproductive Systems
As it turns out, when you ask a bunch of adults to identify specific parts of the human body, suddenly everyone becomes a comedian!
Watch Some Dudes Play Holiday Carols With Their Ball Sacks
I bet the pitch meeting on this commercial was hilarious. Like, someone was all, "Why don't we have a row of nut crackers crunch nuts to holiday tunes?" "'No! Why don't we imply that men have balls of steel that make beautiful music when they collide?" And then the boss — who was in his head and not listening to…
Gahhhhh: Watch a Guy Nail His Balls to the Ground in Red Square
Performance artist Pyotr Pavlensky nailed his scrotum to the cobblestone in front of horrified tourists in Red Square on Sunday as a protest of what he says is Russia's descent into a police state. He was arrested for the stunt. (Video is NSFW.)
Bro Loses One Of His Balls During Fraternity Hazing
If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you do it? How about if everyone were letting the cool older fraternity brothers snap you in the balls with towels? For one hopeful member of Wilmington College's Gamma Phi Gamma chapter, the kind of peer pressure his mom probably warned him about resulted in him being down one…
Wedding Delayed By Man Cutting Off Own Balls
When you work on the internet, at least once per day you come across a story that makes your crotch wince and your brain scream to unremember what it just read. This is today's story.
What We Talk About When We Talk About Balls
Hey, what do we really know about balls, you guys? That they make semen and testosterone. That they are extremely vulnerable, but are bafflingly referred to as symbols of strength. That the expression "ballsy" is a good thing. That they are probably dipped in all manner of substances we might find…
Book Claims JD Salinger's One Ball Drove Him to a Life of Seclusion
You can tell a lot about a man by his balls. If a man has two healthy balls, he's all robust and manly and world-take-over-y. If he has only one, he is a half-man, like the half man on Two and a Half Men. But rather than star on the world's shittiest television show, one famous one balled half man opted to withdraw…
Testicle-Munching Fish Are Ruining Summer for Scandinavians
Summer is full of the sorts of hidden dangers that come with being drunk and out in the hot sun for longer than usual. You could fall asleep in a wading pool and be urinated upon by your neighbor’s dog. A shark could attack you while you’re flipping around on your boogie board like a dying seal. You could wear a…
New Condom Ad Warns Would-Be Dads About Nut-Punching Toddlers
Adweek has (rightly) praised this spec ad written for Durex, a cautionary, slow-mo montage of fathers having their testicles smashed by careless toddlers set to the Moonlight Sonata. All of this nut violence could have been avoided if these dudes just practiced safe sex and avoided procreation. Humanity has had a…
Giant Testicles Are Modern-Day Oracles of Men's Health
Wow, we are truly living in a period of testicle-trivia Enlightenment. Do you remember the ignominious and dark Days of Old before we knew that testes had taste buds on them? I shudder to recall it.
A Few Suggestions for the Next Phase of Ballsack Evolution
Yo, nature! You're crazy, bro. You have to know you're crazy. I mean, you do a great job with a lot of shit—my teeth totally grind up food like a boss; my precision grip is hella virtuosic on the DVR remote; my feet and pelvic angle crush verticality. But seriously, WHAT IS YOUR DEAL WITH BALLS?
