China Bans Erotic Banana-Eating Livestreams, So There Goes My Weekend Plans

Chinese authorities are cracking down on “inappropriate and erotic” content on live-streaming sites, and have now officially banned “seductively eating bananas” and wearing stockings and suspenders. Anyone at Jezebel will attest that that is literally my entire diet and wardrobe, so this news is disconcerting to me…
Texas Governor Greg Abbott Releases Bananas Plan to Overthrow the Federal Government
Texas Governor Greg Abbott has made a career, calling, and vocation out of suing the federal government—“I go into the office, I sue the federal government,” he famously said, back when he was the state’s attorney general, but today he took it to a new and special place. Abbott released an entirely insane, wholly…
Watch Tina Fey in a Weird Banana-Themed Improv Sketch From 1997
Let's take a trip back to 1997, when Tina Fey was performing improv as part of Chicago's Second City. In this video, Fey imitates the calm, soothing tones of a WBEZ host (named Lynn Mahevic) who waxes poetic about the cultural significance of the banana and "its place in religion and history and art—its resonance in…
This Chick Eats 51 Bananas a Day to Stay Thin
Meet Freelee "The Banana Girl," a self-styled diet guru who has developed a program consisting of large meals of a single raw fruit or vegetable. In one YouTube video, she demonstrated how she consumes 51 bananas in one day, adding a new, pun-y layer to the whole "you are what you eat" ethos. B-A-N-A-N-A-S.
Some Asshole Threw Bananas at Italy’s 1st Black Cabinet Minister
Just two weeks after an unapologetically racist dickbag and Italian Senator named Roberto Calderoli compared country’s first black cabinet minister to an “orangutan,” another racist dickbag threw bananas at Integration Minister Cecil Kyenge during a rally.
Screw Gatorade, Bananas Are Where It’s At
Gatorade may have millions of dollars worth of research behind it and a bunch of star athletes endorsing it, but it turns out the humble old banana still does a better job of giving you an energy and nutritional boost when you're exercising. New research looked at whether a banana or a carbohydrate sports drink like…
A Banana Opener, For the World's Laziest People
Seeing as how he believes the banana is an "atheist's nightmare" we don't think Kirk Cameron would approve of this banana opener. And fuck anything that makes us side with that creationist freak.
Rachel Zoe Checks Into Hospital To Deliver Her Baby
According to online reports, Rachel Zoe went into labor this afternoon and has checked into Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles to give birth to her son. Expect impeccably-styled photos of the tot to appear any day now.
Rachel Zoe Announces Pregnancy On Twitter
Though Rachel Zoe was already declared pregnant in a unanimous decision by tabloid editors, she just Tweeted the news herself, adding, "I feel great, Rodger and I are beyond excited and so thankful for all of your love and support."
Demi Moore & A Giraffe Have A Fashion Orgasm With Rachel Zoe

So. I was forced to watch a show I'd never seen before, The Rachel Zoe Project. As far as I can tell, someone died? Rachel dramatically said stuff like, "Taylor was everything to me." And: "My heart is broken. Broken."
Get Hooked On Banana Luchadores
By day these homemade crocheted bananas blend in with the rest of the produce, but by night they don tiny masks and fight it out in the fruit bowl. [Craftster, BoingBoing]
A Reader's Treasury Of Cures For Your Cramps
Recently, I complained of my monthly misery, seeking help — and thank you, seriously, for getting all up in my uterus. Thanks to all of your suggestions, we now present the ultimate guide to curing your cramps!
Food For Thought
After fathering a son at 74, Gerry Burks was dubbed Britain's oldest dad. How does he stay fit - and keep his swimmers so strong? "I eat lots of bananas and always have done, sometimes a couple a day." [UPI]
The Zoe Report: More Goop For Your Inbox
Stylist and reality TV star Rachel Zoe is launching a newsletter called The Zoe Report.
