• Earlier this week on The View, Joy Behar joked about Tiger Woods' mistress Rachel Uchitel: "Yeah, you-ka-tell she's a hooker." Uchitel didn't find it so funny, and her lawyer threatened to sue the show.

• The View responded by issuing this statement: "Joy Behar made a play on Ms. Uchitel's name. This was intended as a joke. We sincerely apologize for the choice of words and for any misimpression the joke may have created." [TMZ]
• Woods, for his part, is taking an "indefinite" break from golf. [ESPN]
• An unnamed Tiger Woods mistress bragged to friends that she had been trying to get pregnant by him for years. "She used to try to arrange to see Tiger when she was ovulating. She thought she'd be set for life financially if she could have Tiger's baby," said a source. Tiger had no idea, but hopefully he's learned an important lesson about birth control. [Radar Online]
• On the Today show, Jamie Jungers said she was introduced to Tiger Woods at a nightclub in 2005 and they ended up sleeping together. She said, "The more we drank, the more flirtatious it got." Isn't that how these things usually go? Jungers insists she isn't part of the escort service that some claim Tiger uses. "I got nothing from this relationship – except a broken heart," she said. [People]
• Escort-service owner Michelle Braun says of Jamie Jungers' story, "That's just a lie. Of course she's going to deny it. What girl is going to go on national TV and admit she was an escort?" [E!]
• In court today Anna Nicole Smith's two doctors and her lawyer, Howard K. Stern, plead not guilty to drug conspiracy charges. A judge refused to suspend the physicians' medical licenses, saying the case has been going on for years, so they're obviously not an "imminent danger." [AP]
• You may have heard that Courteney Cox and David Arquette are adopting a child, but her rep says it's a "complete fabrication." [Daily Express]
• Johnson & Johnson heiress Casey Johnson has been charged with first degree residential burglary and receiving stolen property for allegedly stealing lingerie, mail, clothing, and handbags from her ex-girlfriend Jasmine Lennard's home. [TMZ]
• Here's something you shouldn't regift: engagement rings. The ring Tila Tequila gave her fiancee Casey Johnson is actually the same ring she gave Courtenay Semel when they were dating."It is absolutely not real and Casey is well aware," said Courtenay. "I would not expect Tila to be able to differentiate a real diamond from a fake one. Her ring is as real as her engagement!"" [Radar Online]
• Ashlee Simpson has been cast as a supporting character in Nicole Richie's new sitcom. "Nicole adores Ashlee, and she truly believes in her talent," says a source. "With few other job prospects on the horizon, Ashlee - who desperately wants to establish herself as an actress - was feeling down until Nicole stepped up and promised: ‘I've got your back. What are girlfriends for?'" [Hollywood Scoop]
• Ick. Heidi Montag wrote on Twitter, "Here is a poem I wrote for my hubby Spencer," and linked to a 58-line poem about the flesh-bearded one. Here's a sample: "You are the most selfless, loving, perfect, caring, miraculous soul to be / Every day I am in aw (sic) of you / All of you passions motives are always so pure and true / I feel bad for all the women in the world who don't have you / But sorry ladies there is one and I don't share [Us]
• Charges have been dropped against the 22-year-old Chicago woman accused of videotaping a part of New Moon. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Def Leppard's former manager filed a lawsuit against the band for allegedly not paying her after a 2008 tour. [Radar Online]
• VIDEO: At LAX the paparazzi get too close to a woman in Axl Rose's entourage. He says, "touch her again, I'll break his fucking neck." The photographer touches her again and Axl knocks him to the ground. [TMZ]
• A woman called the police from Nelly's house after she saw "an older man with glasses and a mustache" walking around the house with a duffel bag full of video games and electronics. When the man was asked "why are you here?" he didn't answer and ran for an open window. Was it an early visit from Santa? [TMZ]
• Judy Garland and Sir Elton John were named the top gay icons by a voters on OnePoll.com. [Contact Music]
• Liza Minnelli says The Wizard of Oz isn't one of her favorite films. "I just loved her so and for some reason The Wizard of Oz bothers me when I see it. They do terrible things to her. ... That's 'cause it's my mom." [AP]
• Alyssa Milano is among the many Italian-Americans offended by Jersey Shore "My husband actually showed me the trailer on YouTube last night, and I got upset," she said. "It upset me. I was like, 'Turn that off!' So no, I don't think I'll be watching that!'" Nicole Polizzi, a.k.a. "Snookie," defended her show on The Wendy Williams Show saying, "The Italian, whatever, national, whatever their organization is, they don't understand that 'guidos' and 'guidettes' are good-looking people that, you know, like to make a scene and be center of attention and just take care of themselves... They are old-fashioned. They don't know that; they think it's offensive, because maybe in their time it was offensive, but now it's kind of a compliment. So they don't understand that and that is what we are trying to say. They are way overreacting to the show. We're 22 to 29 just having fun at the shore. They are just taking it way out of proportion." [Us]
• After a screening of her new film The Young Victoria Emily Blunt said, "I don't feel like I had a burning ambition to play the Queen of England... She learned not to mistake stubbornness for strength, and I learned about the humanity of that world." [Style]
• "I can't go two months without being pregnant, engaged, or breaking up because I'm too needy, which is always the one they love," says Kate Hudson. "I'm not needy. You kind of have to laugh it off, but it can kind of screw up other things around it." She added: "If I walk out on the street with any man, I'm dating him. I've been dating two of my best friends from high school who are like girls to me. I have a child, and there are people involved, and it's unfair to talk about somebody else, especially when you're not in that place yet to be discussing those things." [Star]
• Tori Amos says she went through years of therapy but her daughter Natashya, who was born in 2000, was "the missing piece of the puzzle for me. [Her birth] literally kicked out any kind of negativity or self-abuse that I was holding onto." [CNN]
• Dave Itzkoff, who interviewed the remaining members of the Jackson 5 for Sunday's New York Times Magazine says they "seemed mostly unaware of the aura that surrounds their surname. They were a quartet of garrulous, goofy, occasionally cantankerous men who just happen to belong to one of popular culture's most captivating and scrutinized families - and who are still coping with a devastating loss on that same tremendous scale." [N.Y.T.]
• "I am not proud of being rich," says Ricky Gervais. "I still think they are waiting for me to pick up the wrong fork." [ONTD]
• In Esquire's "What I've Learned" column, Peter Jackson admits, "I'm a technophobe. I don't know how the technology works. But I know what the technology is capable of, which is the important thing." He adds, "My thirteen-year-old daughter makes films with her friends on the weekends. Then she edits them on iMovie, and I sit with her and ask her to teach me how to do it. I'm trying to learn." [Esquire]
• 15-year-old Saoirse Ronan says of her character in The Lovely Bones, "I never really thought of Susie Salmon as someone who was dead... Although her body is dead, her soul is still there. That's what makes Susie who she is and that's what I love about her." [Reuters]
• After an Irish report found that Catholic church leaders covered up widespread sexual abuse of children for 30 years, Pope Benedict said he felt "outrage, betrayal, and shame," but Sinead O'Connor is still calling for him to step down. "Popes have had no problem voicing their opinions when we wanted contraception or divorce," O'Connor said. "No problem criticizing The Da Vinci Code. No problem criticizing Naomi Campbell for wearing a bejeweled cross. Yet when it comes to the evils done by pedophiles dressed as priests they are silent. It is grotesque, unbelievable, bizarre and unprecedented. They stand for nothing now but evil." [Reuters]
• Pierce Brosnan, who appears in Roman Polanski's upcoming film The Ghost, says of the director's arrest, "There's a sadness to the whole situation. What happened was wrong in every way, but I just wish the man well and closure for this time in his life, at this moment in time. He's a magnificent director. He's iconic in the world of cinema. I think we've made a good film, the cast is really top class and I just hope that justice will be served with some dignity and compassion, and swiftly... We had dinners, we talked, I met him before and we got on very well together, but I don't know the man. I certainly knew the history of the man, and my heart goes out to his family, to his wife and to his children, and, as I say, I hope this chapter can be closed quickly." [Daily Express]
• "I tried to lose my virginity when I was seven-years-old," Diddy tells Playboy. "I was on top of a girl who was nine or 10, but it didn't happen - so everybody doesn't have to bug out. My mother and the babysitter whipped my ass." [The Sun]

• Though "sources" recently claimed Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal had broken up, an insider now says, "Jake is planning to pop the question over the holidays and couldn't be more excited."

The source continues, "Her children love him, his family loves her and now it's time to make it official... Reese is a traditional sort of lady, which is one of the many things Jake adores about her, and Christmas is her favorite holiday." [Popeater]

• Break out the champagne: A Maryland Judge granted TLC's request for a preliminary injunction against Jon Gosselin this afternoon, so Jon must stop making media appearances that violate his contract with the network. Jon skipped the hearing and his lawyers didn't present any evidence. A trial is scheduled for April 19. [AP]
• Here's what Jon missed: TLC's lawyer said by the end of Jon and Kate Plus 8, the network was paying the family $22,500 per episode, not $75,000 as Jon has claimed. The network's reps also offered a run down of every embarrassing thing Jon did in the past few months that "made the show look bad," explaining, "photos of Jon Gosselin with scores of bikini-clad women was inconsistent with our image brand of our show." [Radar Online]
• In other news, sources say the Gosselin kids no longer believe in Santa. [Us]
• Rachel Uchitel's friend Ashley Sampson was the first person to give an on-the-record interview about Tiger Woods cheating. Rachel tried to cover up their affair by saying she barely knew Ashley and calling her a drug abuser, and now she may sue Rachel for defamation. "Ashley told the truth and Rachel trashed her and lied," said a source. "That made Ashley furious." [Radar Online]
• It appears Rachel Uchitel is moving. She was spotted lugging suitcases and picking up a ton of dog food. [TMZ]
• Jamie Jungers, another woman linked to Tiger Woods, will tell her story on Today, then sell it to a magazine. There's a rumor going around that Tiger paid for her liposuction, but her rep denies it. [Radar Online]
• In an interview with Extra, Jaimee Grubbs said she's "deeply sorry" for having an affair with Tiger Woods. "I couldn't describe how remorseful that I am to have hurt her family and her emotionally... [but] if it wasn't me, it was going to be other girls. I did care about him. I didn't do it for superficial reasons. I didn't do it to purposely hurt [Elin]," said Grubbs. [Radar Online]
• Tiger Woods' mom Kultida Woods flew from L.A. to Atlanta today. [Radar Online]
• Poor Tiger: The scandal has forced him to cover up the name on his yacht. [Radar Online]
• If you're keeping track, the following stars still support Tiger Woods: Donald Trump, Kim Kardashian, Khloe Kardashian, and Wylef Jean. Diddy says: "Ye without sin cast the 1st stone!!!! Put down your rocks sinners!!!!! Tiger keep your head up! God bless your fam Black man!" [Us]
• You can start holding your breath: Kourtney Kardashian's baby is expected "any minute," according to Khloe Kardashian. [Radar Online]
• The mother of Lamar Odom's two children ripped apart a recent story from Life & Style about Khloe Kardashian bonding with the kids. "My daughter met Khloe for about 10-15 minutes... I don't think a 15 minute meet and greet with a child can be defined as a bonding experience for anyone," said Liza Morales. Though the article claimed Khloe hadn't met Lamar Jr. because he was "too young to travel," Morales says, "The truth is my 8-year-old son told me he didn't want to meet her at that time." [Radar Online]
• Gisele Bunchen's mom and aunt visited her and Tom Brady in Boston for the birth of their child. Her aunt says: "He's a beautiful, healthy boy." Gisele's dad, who stayed in Brazil, says, "We don't know the name yet. I don't have all the details. But obviously when someone is born into the family, it makes us all happy." [People]
• At a press conference today Tom Brady called his son's birth "a wonderful experience in my life," and said they still haven't picked out a name. [Us]
• Shawne Merriman is suing Tila Tequila because he says she lied about claims that he "choked and attacked" her. But rather than suing her for defamation, he's going after her for intentional interference with contract and unfair competition because he says she was trying to ruin his career. [TMZ]
• Courtenay Semel thinks Tila Tequila's engagement to Casey Johnson is a stunt. "We're talking about the biggest fame whore in LA, and the other one — I think she's just lost her mind!" said Semel. [Radar Online]
• BREAKING: Taylor Swift straightened her hair. [People]
• Richard Heene, Mark Sanford, Jon Gosselin and Glenn Beck made FAIL Blog's list of 2009's biggest losers, and Imma let them finish, but KANYE WEST WAS VOTED THE TOP FAIL PERSON OF THE YEAR! [People]
• Alicia Keys says of Beyonce, who recorded a duet with Keys for her new album, "Her and I together was like reunited sisters - most people get in the studio and don't get a chance to really collaborate, be in one room, we were in one room having a ball." [The Mirror]
• Several bouncers at Jay-Z's 40/40 Club in Atlantic City have been fired after video surfaced of them beating two men in the club's parking lot last month. [TMZ]
• A source says of Jessica Simpson and Billy Corgan, "They are getting to know each other... He's a nice guy." [Extra]
• Chris Brown called in to a Seattle radio station to promote his new album, but when the DJ asked about Rihanna, Chris said, "I'm really done talking about the whole situation ... I'm just moving forward." The DJ replied: "Fuck that, did Rihanna throw you under the bus or what?" And Chris' handlers hung up. [TMZ]
• Though there is no official Susan Boyle merchandise, there is an estimated £5 million a year market for Boyle-themed merchandise. [Blackbook Magazine]
• Pamela Anderson is doing a two week stint as the Genie of the Lamp in a London performance of Aladdin, but she cancelled her two premiere performances due to unspecified "issues." [Daily Express]
• Pamela Bach has been charged with DUI for failing a breathalyzer test on November 28. Since she has a prior DUI from earlier this year, she'll do a minimum of five days in jail if convicted. [TMZ]
• Axl Rose missed a soundcheck last night in Taiwan for an upcoming Guns n' Roses concert. It may be because he got into a fight with a paparazzo at LAX that "ended up with a few bloodied participants." [Rolling Stone]
• James Caan's wife Linda Cann is requesting full custody of their two minor children in their divorce. [TMZ]
• In Barbara Walters' "10 Most Fascinating People" special last night, Lady Gaga was shown kissing a woman, but Adam Lambert kissing a dude at the AMAs was edited out. An ABC rep says: "It was an editorial decision to show very little from the performance and focus on the fresh, new interview with Adam Lambert," though much of the interview was about the kiss. He continued: "The Lady Gaga kiss was used quickly in context of things that upset her father." [TMZ]
• The Lilith Fair is coming back this summer and the lineup includes Mary J. Blige, Sarah McLachlan, and Sheryl Crow. Check out the full list here: [Perez Hilton]
• Amanda Peet announced she and her husband David Benioff are expecting their second child. [Perez Hilton]
• James Van Der Beek is dating model Kimberly Brook. [People]
• Miley Cyrus' song "The Climb," which was featured in Hannah Montana: The Movie was replaced in the Grammy nominations for best song written for a soundtrack by "All Is Love," which Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs wrote for Where The Wild Things Are. Miley's people say the song was submitted in that category by mistake, but the Grammy organization didn't offer any explanation. [People]
• Spike Jonze says he and Dave Eggers didn't speak to any children before writing the screenplay for Where The Wild Things Are. "I think it's interesting because not having children - Dave and I didn't have children at the time - we wrote it from our memories of childhood as opposed to our experiences as a parent observing a kid," he said. [The Independent]
• Jenifer Lewis didn't exactly crash President Obama's inauguration, but she did manage to trick security. Her seat was far from center stage, "So I went over to a Marine, and I told a fib and said that I left my credentials on the plane. And he was standing there at attention with that beautiful uniform on. His head tilted just a little. He didn't want to break formation. And he said, 'Aunt Helen?' He happened to be a 'Fresh Prince' fanatic. And he proceeded to escort me 30 feet from the podium." [CBS News]
• "I've lived with people speculating about my health for decades, and I don't say this with sarcasm, but sadly, I've outlived so many who have prematurely buried me," says Elizabeth Taylor. "There are so many things in the world that are more important than my health watch." [USA Today]
• "I always felt like a very ordinary looking girl, and I found that dressing in a unique way made me feel less ordinary and more glamorous," says Dita Von Teese, adding, "I also used clothes as a way to counteract my extreme shyness when I was younger. I wore a lot of extravagant vintage hats, which can make people somewhat intimidated. I think people will only approach if they have something very, very interesting to say to the girl in the outrageous hat!" [People]
• Meryl Streep drank a martini at a party after a New York screening of It's Complicated "I had to," she said, "to get through this." Also, when someone yelled "It's hard to be Queen," at Meryl, she shot back, "I wouldn't want her problems, believe me!" [Showbiz 411]
• When he was in college, Eli Roth of Inglourious Basterds worked as a sex chat room operator, posing as a woman. "They hired guys because guys know what other guys want to hear," Roth said. "The creepy thing was, because this was in 1991, we only got doctors and scientists because they were the ones using the Internet." [BBC]
• Here are some words of wisdom by 50 Cent from Esquire's "What I've Learned" column: "Always have bail money," "Money is freedom. Money is a private plane. Money is no metal detection," and "Being shot defines how strong I am. It prepares you for the confusion of being an artist." [Esquire]

• According to an ex-girlfriend of Yankees star Alex Rodriguez: "He was so vain. He had not one, but two painted portraits of himself as a centaur. You know, the half man, half horse figure. It was ridiculous." [NYDN]

• Apparently, the centaur paintings don't bother Kate Hudson any: "All she does is talk about Alex," says a source, "She even plans her movie schedule around him. She's madly in love." [ShowbizSpy]
• An author has written a book all about Britney Spears that is based on psychotherapy sessions he took...on Britney's behalf. .[LATimes]
• "There are some people out there who think that I'm repulsive, that I'm not even human. This guy said, if he had a choice between having sex with me and cutting his dick off, then he'd cut his own dick off. And I was like, first of all I think you're lying. But second, if he is telling the truth, then that says something pretty profound … about him."- Diablo Cody [Guardian]
• "Yeah, once in a while, but it's not like it used to be, now they're weird sizes and strange shapes. But yeah, once in a while we get a nice pair of panties."- Billy Joel, on having underwear thrown at the stage while he's performing. And yes, I wrote underwear, not the other word. Pant—-, see! I can't even write it! Ugh! [NYMag]
• Colin Farrell and his girlfriend, Alicja Bachleda, had a son together on October 7. The boy's name is Henry Tadeusz Farrell; he's Farrell's second child and Bachelda's first. [People]
• The woman accused of stalking both Justin Timberlake and Axl Rose claims that she's been targeted by "Babylon witches" who have "evil" powers over her. [TMZ]
• "I thought there were thousands of other guys that deserved it, but it's been a great year. But now the pressures off. I can be a slob again." -Hugh Jackman, on handing over his "Sexiest Man Alive" crown. [People]
• "I'm 61 now and I think I'll probably be touring for the next five years. I'm in better shape now than I was at 30. I'm like Benjamin Button."- Alice Cooper [Independent]
• "The Starry Messenger," starring Matthew Broderick, has been pushed back from its original off-Broadway debut date, due to shaky preview performances wherein Broderick seemed to forget several lines. [Yahoo]
• Bruce Springsteen, Mick Jagger, and The Black Eyed Peas joined u2 on stage last night at a concert celebrating the 25th anniversary of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. The show will be broadcast on HBO in November. [Yahoo]
• Metallica and Lou Reed also played together, as did Annie Lennox and Aretha Franklin. [NYTimes]
• Sienna Miller got upset when a photographer asked her about her ex-boyfriend, Jude Law, as she was walking her dog in New York City: "Just before she got home, she had an outburst, told the photographers to [bleep] off and burst into tears," says a source. [PageSix]
• "It was hard on both of us. When we were talking, I said, ‘Even though this isn't happening right now, I'm going to still go out on the road. And he said, ‘Great, I support you.' And he's been very supportive."-Lady Gaga, on continuing her tour after her planned tour with Kanye West was canceled. [ShowbizSpy]
• A source claims that the Jon Gosselin/Hailey Glassman breakup has all been"carefully orchestrated" for the press: "First, Hailey laments how hard her life has been lately and how bad Jon treats her, then Jon repents. Next, Jon plans to announce that he is going to be spending some time alone. It has all been designed so that it doesn't seem as though Hailey got dumped." [People]
• Meanwhile, Jon's spiritual advisor, Rabbi Shmuley Boteach has released another statement re: Jon's relationship with Hailey: "I have advised him to end it with Hailey. It is unacceptable to be in a relationship when he is still married and has to take care of kids who are hurting. It is not a healthy relationship." [PageSix]
• This slideshow proves that Heidi Klum is excellent at picking out and pulling off Halloween costumes. [CNN]
• "It is heartbreaking to see so many young girls and boys suffering. I spent some time visiting brothels and showing prostitutes how to use condoms to prevent the spread of AIDS. I met one woman who has three children and prostitution is the only thing she can do to feed them. I met children sold by their families into domestic slavery, who are abused and worked around the clock."- Molly Sims, describing a recent charity trip to Haiti. [PageSix]
• Kenny Ortega says that Michael Jackson was hoping to make a series of movies: "He told me he wanted to create a partnership with me to do films. We were talking about doing Legs Diamond. And we were talking about doing a full-length, 3-D feature of Thriller." [DailyExpress]
• "I'd never experienced anything like that, and I would never wish anyone else to. Being judged by the colour of your skin is horrible. My dad is really laid-back. He said, 'Don't worry about it. I've experienced stuff like that many times, especially when I was younger, so don't be upset for me. I'm fine.' Do you know what he did? He got my CD, went back in the shop and said, 'You've just offended a really nice young lady. I just want to leave you this, so you can look and see who it is. This is my daughter. I'm not trying to cause trouble, but I wanted you to see that.'"-Leona Lewis, on being asked to leave a shop because the saleswoman "didn't like the look" of her father. [DailyMail]
• JoAnna Garcia of Privileged will guest star on an upcoming episode of How I Met Your Mother, as a college friend of Ted's. [JustJared]
• Brooke Shields was the one who convinced Andre Agassi to shave his head; before then, he'd been wearing a wig on the court. [DailyMail]
• I was working in the lab late one night, when my eyes beheld an eerie sight, for my monster from his slab began to rise, and suddenly to my surprise,he did the mash! He did the monster mash! The monster mash! It was a graveyard smash, you guys. For real. [YouTube]

• Mayumi Heene has admitted that the entire "Balloon Boy" story was a hoax. According to a recently released search warrant affidavit, "the motive for the fabricated story was to make the Heene family more marketable for future media interest." [Reuters]

• Heene also admitted that she and her husband, Richard "knew all along" that their youngest son, Falcon was hiding, and not in the balloon as they had led authorities to believe. All three children, she says, were instructed to lie. [NYDN]
• You can read the entire affidavit here.[The Coloradoan]
• A computer taken from one of the "Burglar Bunch" members who allegedly broke into Lindsay Lohan's apartment is filled with Google image searches for "Lindsay Lohan Blue Rolex" and "Lindsay Lohan Rolex." [TMZ]
• Meanwhile, Paris Hilton visited the LAPD last night and retrieved most of her stolen property; Hilton had lost nearly $2 million in valuables to the ring of thieves targeting starlets' homes. [People]
• Lisa Rinna's former landlord says she owes "$635,083.73 in back rent and damages," on her former retail location, Belle Gray. Rinna, meanwhile, took to her Twitter page to announce that she had "a very different story. Let the games begin!" [E!]
• "It'd be nice to have a six-year-old and say, 'I have this film I made, you might quite like it'. Yeah, definitely that's on my mind."- Wes Anderson on his new film, The Fantastic Mr. Fox. [Guardian]
• Jon Gosselin still hasn't returned the money he withdrew from his joint account with Kate Gosselin. [People]
• "I've had many, many unrequited crushes. I knew this one guy's entire schedule my senior year of high school and would conveniently be outside his classrooms whenever class let out. But I was a goth kid and he was a soccer player, so he wasn't having it. He was just horrified by me."- Christina Hendricks [Advocate]
• Food Network star Sandra Lee says that Angelina Jolie used her "No-Bake Birthday Cake" recipe in August in order to create a birthday cake for her son, Maddox. "She's a very busy, overextended mother," says Lee, "I'm very proud not just that she made my cake but that someone of her stature isn't delegating these [tasks], like her children's birthday, to other people. I'm glad she loves the show and that the kids apparently also watch it too." Please let them get together for an episode! Angelina Jolie making dinners out of stuffing, salad dressing mix, and half a can of Miracle Whip would be the greatest hour of programming ever, no? [People]
• "I look at what happened to Michael Jackson and it's a case of 'there but for the grace of God go I.' Those painkillers! F***!'"-Ozzy Osbourne [DailyMail]
• Justin Timberlake has filed a restraining order against a woman named Karen McNeil, who already served a year in prison for violating several court orders issued to keep her away from Axl Rose [TMZ]
• Boy George says his time in prison was good for him: "I'm the happiest I've ever been." [TheSun]
• When Winona Ryder agreed to a low-budget film The Private Lives of Pippa Lee, she was seemingly unprepared for just how low-budget it would be: "Little did I know I would be in Danbury, Connecticut, without a rental car, living off a highway. I had to rely on Keanu, who had the car he drives in the film, to get me to Starbucks - that's how low-budget it was." [DailyExpress]
• Jennifer Lopez plans to debut her alter-ego character, "Lola" tonight. Hooray? [PageSix]
• Charlize Theron raised $140,000 at a recent charity auction by auctioning off a kiss to a female fan. [DailyExpress]
• "I still don't feel that John's fans are accepting me. I don't know who's really John's fans, and who's really John and Yoko fans. The Beatles fans, some of them really denounced John in a way. So I don't know who's who. So whenever I create something I never think about who's gonna listen to it. But then, I'm getting some beautiful letters. So they like the CD or something. It's really great, but I'm not gonna ask, ‘Are you a Beatles fan?'"-Yoko Ono [TimesOnline]
• "I knew going into Miss USA I was asked to be there because I am controversial and because I am qualified. I look at women in the spotlight every day. I know how a girl can successfully navigate that world."- Perez Hilton [LATimes]
• LaToya Jackson says that Michael's children are still grieving the loss of their father, and though all three are in therapy, Paris seems to be handling things a bit better than her brothers, Prince and Blanket: "Prince just doesn't want to speak about it. He won't even watch the DVDs – he just walks right past the TV. It's too soon, too touching. I do worry about him very much. And Blanket is just a very sad, shy little boy. He cries – he really does cry. It's so painful for him. No one can bring his daddy back and it hurts so much." [Mirror]
• Paul Heyman of ECW says that Rihanna's "Russian Roulette" cover art is a complete rip off of the wrestling organization's cover art for the compilation "ECW: Extreme Music." TheSun]
• Roseanne took to her blog to speak out against her ex-husband Tom Arnold for cracking jokes about the couple's relationship as it relates to the recent David Letterman scandal, as Tom keeps cracking jokes that he slept with his boss, which, according to Roseanne, is not the case: "I never had sex with an employee! Tom was first my boyfriend and then repeatedly asked me to create a job for him on my show, which I did," she writes, later concluding with, "Stop accusing me of breaking laws that I never would break. Having sex with your underlings is not allowed, unless you legally marry them. Otherwise it is creating a hostile work environment, where those who do not have sex with the boss do not get promoted. this is the law! stop setting me up for lawsuits with your careless lies!!! shut the fuck up about me you idiot!" [RoseanneWorld]

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ that they try and book a suspect for the most serious crime they can be charged with. While domestic abuse is punishable by up to four years in prison, a suspect found guilty of making criminal threats will do up to nine years. Of course, it's up to the D.A. to file any additional charges. (And a jury must find him guilty.) In addition, the breaking news is that Chris Brown may have used a "deadly weapon" in the assault.

This high-profile situation raises so many questions:

• Will Rihanna break up with him? You might think think that a 911 call and a trip to the hospital would immediately mean that a relationship is over. But Diane Lane's husband, Josh Brolin, was arrested for spousal battery in 2004. She declined to press charges, however, and they remain married. And plenty of women, all over the world, stay in physically or emotionally abusive relationships.
• Will Chris Brown's career suffer? The singer has a deal with Wrigley's gum and has been pursuing acting; he was in StompThe Yard and on an episode of the The O.C and was supposed to star in a basketball film called Phenom. Do people support a man who hits women? Miles Davis sold a lot of albums. Axl Rose was accused of abuse by both Stephanie Seymour and ex-wife Erin Everly.
• What if Rihanna doesn't break up with Chris Brown? What would happen to her? Her well-being, her carefully-managed image via Jay-Z and the people at Def Jam; her ads for Gucci and CoverGirl cosmetics? Rihanna — and her management — were always reluctant to admit that the star was dating Chris Brown; how will they handle commenting on this incident to the public, should she choose to stay with him? Or will they "encourage" her to stop seeing him?

One thing is clear: Whether or not he is found guilty, Chris Brown has some issues he needs to deal with. In 2007, he talked to Giant magazine about his abusive stepfather:

Like the day an 11-year-old Brown made a promise to his mother. He vowed that he would go to jail by age 15 for killing his abusive stepfather. "I just want you to know that I love you," he told her. "But I'm gonna take a baseball bat one day while you at work, and I'm gonna kill him." Brown's parents had separated when he was seven. When his mother remarried, she moved her son and his new stepfather to a trailer park. Then his stepfather shot himself in the head. The shot went straight through the eyes. He survived the suicide attempt but was permanently blinded.

"When you're blind, your senses are heightened, like your smell, hearing, your sense of touch," Brown explains. "You can move and maneuver around your sight. But he used to hit my mom….He made me terrified all the time, terrified like I had to pee on myself. I remember one night he made her nose bleed. I was crying and thinking, ‘I'm just gonna go crazy on him one day…' I hate him to this day."

Chris Brown Could Do Nine Years in Prison [TMZ]
Chris Brown Allegedly Attacks Rihanna, Own Career With 'Deadly Weapon' [Defamer]
EXCLUSIVE: Is Chris Brown Violent? [Giant]

• Britney's big eff you to her (chef) dad: Skipping dinner: "Britney thinks that if she doesn't eat much she will lose weight, then people will notice," an insider says. [MSNBC]

• Madonna is honoring Guy Ritchie's request to return to the UK for the holidays, so he can see the kids. But: Surprise! She's bringing A-Rod with her. Merry Christmas! [The Sun]
• Scarlett Johansson is threatening to sue Cosmopolitan UK over fabricated quotes about her marriage to Ryan Reynolds. [Guardian]
• Here's the thing: British Cosmo claims that the story written by Rebecca Winters Keegan had an "additional interview" by Francesca Williams. "Francesca Williams" is a pseudonym, and the "interview" was done at a press junket for Vicky Cristina Barcelona, on Aug. 4, when ScarJo wasn't even married. WTF. [WWD]
• Even Queen Elizabeth is feeling the effects of the crappy economy: They're serving leftovers at Buckingham palace. [Page Six]
• Skidoosh! Jack Black will be on a special post-Super Bowl episode of The Office! [UPI]
• Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber's newborn son has a name! Please give a warm welcome to Samuel Kai Schreiber. [People]
• January Vogue is all, "Yes We Can… Put Anne Hathaway on the cover, smiling like she's high on glue." [ONTD]
• By the by, Anne Hathaway's ex, Raffaello Follieri, has agreed to repay more that $3.6 million back to those he ripped off in a real estate scam. [Yahoo News via AP]
• Anthony Kiedis narrowly escaped kidney failure? [Gatecrasher]
• The news about Nicole Richie getting music advice from Rihanna and Kelly Osbourne? False. But! Nicole does eventually want to record an album. "Right now I have a lot on my plate," she says. "I've really been working hard – going on auditions for acting, doing design for my line, and being a mom – so that pretty much takes up my days." [People]
• Benji Madden and Paris Hilton were seen having a "quiet conversation" at the grand opening of the Dolce & Gabbana boutique on Robertson Boulevard hosted by Rachel Bilson. (?) Are they getting back together? [Yahoo News via E!]
• Someone besides the "Saudi Princess" was there in the Ruffalo death: Another person was arrested one day after Scott Ruffalo, Mark Ruffalo's brother, was shot; but he was released three days later without being charged. [TMZ]
• Dennis Quaid and his wife have settled their dispute with Cedars-Sinai Medical Center over that massive overdose that almost killed their twin babies. The Quaids will get $750,000, subject to court approval. [TMZ]
• Blind item! "Which daughter of a sports legend made a sex tape with two dudes when she was just 16? Lets hope this doesn’t hurt her (non-existent) showbiz career." [Gatecrasher]
• Anti-Scientology protesters tried to make a scene outside the premiere of Tom Cruise's new flick, Valkyrie, but they had the wrong location, whoops. [MSNBC Scoop]
• Meanwhile, Katie Holmes attended the Christmas party in her NYC building, because she is a good neighbor. [Page Six]
• Uh-oh: Uma Thurman's beau, Arpad Busson, is among those swindled by Wall Street deal-maker Bernard Madoff. He lost a lot. [Daily Mail]
• Brandy's 2006 car crash will not go away: A man was was injured in the multi-car pileup is suing Brandy… and the lady who died in the wreck. [TMZ]
• Isaiah Washington is now a citizen of Sierra Leone. [Perez Hilton]
• Click for video of Emma Watson, who says, after Harry Potter ends, "I think I will be ready to do other things…" but: "People just think of me as Hermione." [Guardian]
• Axl Rose wrote a 4,584-word open letter over the weekend and posted it on his band's website; he talks about Slash, the media, Chinese Democracy, and: "I don't see myself as solely Guns, but I do see myself as the only one from the past making the effort to take it forward whether anyone approves or not and giving beyond what many would or fight for to do so...I don't feel any reason whatsoever I should have to throw what I've not only worked for but fought and suffered for away because some hurt, angry, betrayed, misguided and lied to people with a lynch mob mentality, joined by others who could care less (especially in the media), enjoying the controversy and hate, choose one over the other regardless of what's right because they want what they want…" [Yahoo News via E!]
• Tim McGraw says despite rumors, he is not running for Governor of Tennessee in 2010. Maybe later in life, though: "I think I gotta get a lot smarter between now and then!" [People]
• Emma Thompson says her husband is so cheap: "He makes Oliver Cromwell look like Imelda Marcos on a spending spree in the Egyptian bit of Harrod's with Elton John's credit card." She adds: "When I whimper as I watch him pulling his ancient, baggy and fake Calvin Klein pants up over his perfectly formed six-pack to his chin, he snaps 'Oh, stop it. These'll be perfect for the next five years.'" [Telegraph]
• Look for Jennifer Lopez to star in a romcom called Plan B, in which a single woman conceives twins through artificial insemination (her Plan B) only to meet the man of her dreams (her Plan A) on the very same day. OMG what to do? [Hollywood Reporter]
• Reese Witherspoon will star in an untitled project by James L. Brooks, known for Broadcast News, Terms of Endearment and Spanglish. [Variety]
• Six minutes, six minutes, six minutes: Doug E. Fresh is facing triple foreclosure. [US News & World Report]
• Hoochie coochie yaya mama: The Labelle ladies — Patti LaBelle, Nona Hendryx and Sarah Dash — are back, playing a show at Harlem's Apollo Theater Friday and planning a 2009 tour. [USA Today]
• A jury says that three women who own Oscars won by silent film star Mary Pickford cannot sell them; Pickford never wanted the statuettes to be sold. But! Imagine the price those things would fetch? [Yahoo News via AP]
• Kirk Douglas, 92: The oldest celebrity blogger on MySpace. [Reuters]
• Peter Falk has Alzheimer's disease and can no longer run his own life. [TMZ]
• Hollywood private eye Anthony Pellicano's been sentenced to 15 years in prison for spying on the rich and famous. [WSJ]
• El oh el: "A contaminated monkey skull, termite-infested statues and other African artifacts of the so-called reality television show Survivor will not be allowed into the United States." Customs agents seized an bunch of stuff CBS was trying to ship from the African nation of Gabon back to the U.S. [CBS News]
• Mickey Rourke has ordered his tux for awards season: "It's got to have some pink in it," he says. "You're not going to see me ever in just black and white." [USA Today]
• "Brooklyn gets a lot of love. It's time for the Bronx to get a little bit of love too." — Pete Wentz. [Time]
• "I'm still kind of embarrassed to say it, but I had to go and see a therapist for many years and work really hard to find out what made me short circuit. There were just too many things in me that were broken that I didn't know how to fix, so I love my therapist because he took 13 years to sit there with me. I was very ashamed of seeing a therapist because I thought only crazy people went, and then, after about nine years, I asked him, 'Well, was I really crazy?' And he nodded and said, 'You were, but not any more.'" — Mickey Rourke. [Daily Express]
• "I felt the show could not go on any further without having the first black bitch on television. And he agreed." — Diahann Carroll on her conversation with Aaron Spelling about Dynasty. [Telegraph]
• "There are bands that I got into when I was 15, when I was mad at my dad and just wanted to be different. I don't think I'd give those bands half a chance now. But I hold some kind of nostalgia for them that I won't let go. Bands like Minor Threat and Black Flag. If someone just gave that stuff to me and I didn't have any of the associations that went along with punk rock or the angst, do I think that I would just go, Hey, I like this song, as opposed to 'Umbrella' by Rhianna? I'm not sure. I think I would probably go with 'Umbrella.' I'm probably going to get shot for saying that, but it's the truth." — Pete Wentz. [Time]
• "My mates are in a totally different place. I’ve grown up so much over the last few years, and they are still all into going out, and dancing and taking drugs, and they haven’t got work at five in the morning. I hang out with much older people, I go for dinners at posh places and talk about art! I haven’t really talked about this but when I decided I wanted to have a baby, I made a decision to change my life." — Lily Allen. [Spectator]
• "I'm a foodie. I like the best of the best, from sushi at Nobu to cheesecake at Junior’s in Brooklyn." — Jay-Z. [Gatecrasher]

• Move over Jon Stewart, Hugh Jackman will be hosting this year's Oscars! "Hugh is the ideal choice to host a celebration of the year’s movies – and to have fun doing it." says a flack. [Deadline Hollywood]

• Kate Winslet is offended by speculation that her 30-year-old character in The Reader is a child abuser for having an affair with a 15-year-old. "To me, that is absolutely not this story at all. That boy knows exactly what he's doing. And, for a start, Hanna Schmitz thinks that he's 17, not 15, you know? She's not doing anything wrong. They enter that relationship on absolutely equal footing. Statutory rape? Really, please, don't use that phrase…This is a beautiful and very genuine love story and that is how I always saw it," Winslet says. [UPI]
• Despite earlier reports, Pete Wentz swears up and down that he and Ashlee do not want to hock their photos of newborn Bronx to the highest bidder. "Truth is like every celeb couple we were offered
  mounds and mounds of money by mags from here to Guam to pimp out the baby. We just don’t want to go down that road with him," Wentz says on his blog. [Perez]
• Zooey Deschanel's fake band in the movie Yes Man is called Munchausen By Proxy Syndrome, and it's actually not half bad. [NYM]
• Rufus Wainwright is one gay guy who will not be joining the fight against Prop 8: "Oddly enough, I’m actually not a huge gay marriage supporter," Rufus says. "I personally don’t want to get married but I think that any law or amendment to the constitution that deals with sex and love should just be banned in general. I don’t think any government should encroach on what goes on in the bedroom at all. Frankly, if you want to marry a dog, why don’t you go ahead and marry a dog, I don’t care. I’m a complete libertarian and so I really disagree with it." [Perez]
• Rut roh. Allegedly Denise Richards is in dire financial straits. "She's willing to do just about anything and take any role that's not pure porn," says a source. [TMZ]
• Rumors abound that Axl Rose has Anthropophobia, or loosely, he's afraid of people, and has been avoiding interviews and his management as a result. His flacks deny it, saying, "He has not been diagnosed with anthropophobia. He hasn't fired Front Line, and no interviews have been canceled." It does sound sort of far-fetched. [Perez]
• Aw, 9-year-old Angelina Salaiz got to meet her hero, Mariah Carey, earlier today on CBS's morning show. We bet they bonded over a shared love of Hello Kitty and butterflies. [CBS News]
• Is the world ready for a Mel Gibson comeback? Um E! Online says yes, because he grew a mustache. Yeah…ok. [E! Online]
• K-Fed was out bowling and he kissed a mystery lady. Riveting news! [TMZ]

• Sources say Paula Abdul is basically done with American Idol. Just like when she sees a mediocre contestant, it's all: "Thank you, but no." [MSNBC Scoop]

• Former American Idol producer Nigel Lythgoe says maybe it was the producers' fault that "stalker" Paula Goodspeed ended up in the same room with Abdul on the show: "We've seen over 700,000 contestants. And one has made a terrible, terrible mistake." [People]
• Macaulay Culkin's sister Dakota died yesterday in a terrible traffic accident in L.A.; she stepped off a curb and was struck by a car. [TMZ]
• Scarlett Johansson talks about hubs Ryan Reynolds: "Getting married is a huge moment in anyone's life, and the few months leading up to it were a little crazy. But Ryan and I are in love, and we're enjoying evolving our relationship together. I feel that my life and my work are heading in the right direction." Also? They're both very romantic. Just so you know. [Perez Hilton]
• Holy sunglasses! Stevie Wonder might be the next contestant on Dancing With The Stars. Stevie sez: "It'd be fun. It's not impossible, but right now it's just a thought… Come on. You've got to think. If I have 7 children, I've got to be able to dance right?" [Perez Hilton]
• Oooh, a book exposing secrets about Martha Stewart? Written by a member of her own family? Intimate details of Martha's boozing, eating and crying binges… the stars she hates, what really happened in prison and her "special" lady friend. A good thing? [Jossip]
• Tom Cruise's new flick, Valkyrie: Reviews are meh. Not good for a $90 million picture. [Fox 411]
• Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty are still going strong; they were seen checking out some rock show in Hollywood. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Watch Sienna miller act like a mental patient as she wanders around in a hospital gown and smears blood on a wall in this video by UK band The Hours. Deep. [Just Jared]
• Mariah Carey's world tour is canceled. Bun in oven? [Perez Hilton]
• Britney's kid burped while she was wishing people Merry Christmas in a video or her site. Charming! [People]
• Heath Ledger's family is "so proud" the actor got a Golden Globe nomination for The Dark Knight. [People]
• There's a London couple being sentenced for supplying drugs to a "hit list" of celebs including — wait for it — Amy Winehouse. [The Star]
• "Of the 90 or so actors to grace the Saturday Night Live stage since its first show in 1975, only eight have been African-American." Boo. And ridiculous. [Gatecrasher]
• Here's everything you never wanted to know about how Samantha Ronson is suing the lawyer she hired to stop Perez Hilton from spreading rumors about her and how the lawyer is suing her right back and how blogs are writing about the whole thing. [LA Times]
• Maggie Gyllenhaal and Peter Sarsgaard are joining the cast of Classic Stage Company’s production of Uncle Vanya. Pretty daamn cute, being in a plaay together. [NY Times]
• Ugly Betty's Ashley Jensen is suing the host of Bravo's Flipping Out, Jeff Lewis over "aggressive threats and outrageous behavior." [TMZ]
• We've heard this one before but here it is again: Seal says Heidi Klum told him she was pregnant after their first date. "I laughed and said, 'Already? That’s amazing!' She said, 'Not with you stupid.' There was a pause of about 10 seconds," Seal says, "and I said, 'It doesn’t change the way I feel about you because the fact that you are here tells me that you think a lot about me.'" [Mirror]
• Enrique Inglesias groped a 17-year-old girl on stage in London while singing to her. Well, he put his hand on her heart. But that is kind of close to some other stuff. The young lady in question, Maria from Essex says: "I had such an amazing night. I'll never forget it. It felt like a dream. He's so hot." [Mirror]
• Gilmore Girls star Lauren Graham is coming back to primetime! Look for her in an ABC comedy from writer Alex Herschlag (Will and Grace) about a self-help guru who teaches women how to live a stress-free life — but struggles to follow her own advice when her boyfriend dumps her. [Variety]
• Eminem and Dr. Dre are back in the studio, and Em says he and his mentor are "up to our old mischievous ways." Good news. [Reuters]
• Real estate drama between Nicolette Sheridan and former fiancé Michael Bolton: Dude is homeless! [Page Six]
• Did Gwyneth Paltrow have a boob job? [Page Six]
• Axl Rose is anthropophobic — afraid of people. Some people are probably quite Axlphobic. [Page Six]
• If you smell the pungent scent of marijuana, know this: Willie Nelson cannot be far away. [Page Six]
• Kim Raver's heading to Ethiopia for UNICEF. [Page Six]
• Whitney Port has finally discovered that L.A. guys are trolls and New York guys are "more confident and know what they want." [Page Six]
• Blind item! "Which rehabbed starlet convinced a group of college kids to bring her a big bag of powder? She hoarded all the drugs for herself before kicking the kids out of her hotel. But the crew had the last laugh - they stole her entire liquor stash as they left." [Gatecrasher]
• Rihanna and Kelly Osbourne are coaching Nicole Richie as she prepares to release her debut album? Does this mean corsets and "Papa Don't Preach"? [Daily News]
• ALL 13 streets on a new £400million estate are being named after Rolling Stones hits. [The Sun]
• "I've heard stories from my aunts and uncles and my dad, I had an attitude about Germans, a prejudice about them. I speak several languages and I'm interested in languages. I can read a German paper slowly and can almost figure it out, yet I don't speak German and I realize I don't want to speak German. I don't like the way it sounds and I don't like being in Germany. By playing a German and trying to be honest about it I sort of got past that prejudice and judgment... Germans are people too!" — Viggo Mortensen. [Daily Express]
• "Mental disease is the only thing you can be diagnosed with and get yelled at for having. Why is that? From the moment I was diagnosed there was a certain sense of euphoria and 'Thank God' we figured this out. I thought that I'd become such a curmudgeon." — The Sopranos' Joe Pantoliano, who was miserable despite the success and family he'd always wanted. (He was diagnosed with clinical depression.) [AP]
• "I loved her, no question, in the proper platonic sense but, yes, I loved her. We were filming one day and I kept her waiting on set because I was still in my caravan, playing cards. She stormed in and shouted: 'You are a real nut and I've met some nuts in my day.' And then she hit me. A couple of hours later, I went to see her and gave her a present to say I was sorry for keeping her waiting. She said: 'Don't worry, pig. I only hit the people I love.'" — Peter O'Toole on Katharine Hepburn. [Daily Mail]
• "Some people believe that if you date a person from another race you are somehow denying who you are. They believe that dating someone with a different skin color somehow makes you a self-hater, loathing that which makes you yourself. They believe that it's an insult to your parents, ancestors, heritage and community. I find this view much more telling about the people who say this than about those who do find a physical, spiritual, mental and emotional connection with someone who looks different than themselves. Choosing someone who I am physically attracted to and who also inspires, uplifts, educates and keeps me interested is my first priority- not their race." — Russell Simmons. [ONTD]
• "I've never played super-dark in a film. I think I'd be curious to do it. If a character comes along that I find really compelling and it works out that the director wants to go that direction with me, I'm totally willing to try. I've actually auditioned, but I think people have a hard time making the leap from — I don't want to use this as a cop-out, but my energy is not dark, my being is not dark. Oh, gosh — I can be very dark… I become very Eeyore." — Amy Adams. [Washington Post]
• "WHAT I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day" - Phyllis Diller in Bruce Littlefield's book, Merry Christmas, America!. [Page Six]
• "I have excellent facilities for ablutions, should you ever tire of the sweating and such. I'd be happy to scrub your back - from a safe distance." "We could meet early evening and bolster your rightly damaged ego with orgasms." "Come and see me in the daytime. We could generate a satanic infant." — text messages to ladies from Russell Brand. [Gatecrasher]

• Madonna and Alex Rodriguez are "quietly" shopping for a love nest in Manhattan. Is this relationship really real? And why so quick on the rebound, your Madgesty? [Page Six]
• Neither Angelina Jolie nor Brad Pitt can really cook. Angie's "signature dish" is cereal. Brad says, "I can rock a Sunday BBQ but that’s as far as my culinary talents go." [The Sun]
• Barack Obama will almost certainly be Barbara Walters' "Most Fascinating Person of 2008." [Rush & Molloy]
• Beyoncé, blue? Back in 1999, after Destiny's Child changed group members, and the former members accused her father of failing to share profits, Beyoncé felt that everyone blamed her for the group's troubles. She says, "For a couple of years when I was 19 I suffered depression." [Daily Express]
• Check out Beyoncé on the cover of Giant. [Concrete Loop]
• Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty want to do a film together? Is this a joke? [The Sun]

• Amy Winehouse sent X Factor judge Louis Walsh a green tie and shamrock cufflinks as a thank you for being nice to her goddaughter Dionne, who visited the show. The gift came with a handwritten note. A source says: "I very much doubt that Amy wrote it herself as at the end of note there was just a scrawling signature in completely different writing." [The Sun]
• Kate Moss and Jamie Hince had a "scuffle" over their holiday plans: Kate had scratches on her cheek; Jamie had a black eye from her chunky ring. [Page Six]
• OMFG: Gossip Girl's Ed Westwick and Jessica Szohr (Chuck Bass and Vanessa) were seen "canoodling" at the Dallas airport on Sunday night. [Page Six]
• Did anyone see Nastia Liukin on Gossip Girl last night? [LA Times]
• Speaking of Gossip Girl, Kelly Rutherford, aka Lilly van Der Woodsen, is expecting her second child. [ET]
• Gwyneth Paltrow is still with Chris Martin; the rumors that she'd shacked up with a real estate billionaire appear to be false. [Rush & Molloy]
• This reporter is shocked that there are dozens of Facebook groups dedicated to "bullying" Nicole Kidman. One is called "Am I Taking Crazy Pills or is Nicole Kidman the Worst Actress in the World?" and another is "Nicole Kidman Looks Like An Alien With Foetal Alcohol Syndrome." The writer claims, "She is hard-working and dedicated to her family and hasn't a hint of the prima donna about her, they say." [News.com.au]
• Kanye West was playing his new album for the band Keane so loud that he blew up the mixing desk. [The Sun]
• Try to picture Keanu Reeves on a panel with Caltech researchers. It's happening Friday; he's discussing his flick The Day The Earth Stood Still and how "science in the movie meshes with real world scientific research." [UPI]
• The new season of American Idol will be "more real" and "intimate" and "raw," "letting the kids be more emotional." Somehow, Paula Abdul plays a role in this. [MSNBC Scoop]
• You know how Peaches Geldof was working on a magazine? It's called Disappear Here and it will be distributed free on Thursday, in "secret places" in New York. [Gawker]
• News you can't use: Clay Aiken is a "hands-on dad." [People]
• Lost fans: There's a casting call out for a father and son who speak Arabic… Sayid backstory plotline alert! [EW]
• Former UCLA Medical Center employee Lawanda Jackson pleaded guilty Monday to selling confidential info about Farrah Fawcett's cancer battle to the National Enquirer. Plus, she used her boss's password to access the medical records of dozens of patients, including Britney Spears and Maria Shriver. She'll be sentenced in May. [Yahoo News]
• Parminder Nagra, who plays Dr. Neela Rasgotra on ER — and whom some may recall as "Jess" from Bend It Like Beckham, is pregnant with her first child. The baby daddy is boyfriend James Stenson, a photographer, with whom she's been for 7 years. [Us Magazine, UPI]
• Courteney Cox Arquette will be on three episodes of Scrubs, starting January 6. Matthew Perry will also show up on Scrubs, later in the season. [People]
• Eva Longoria smokes. [Perez Hilton]
• "Michael Phelps has turned into a party and poker animal, surrounding himself with bimbos and booze." [Page Six]
• M.I.A. is expecting a B.A.B.Y. and is keeping B.U.S.Y. — she has 3 songs on the Slumdog Millionaire soundtrack and launched N.E.E.T., a record label to bring politically charged music to the mainstream. She says: "I think my baby is going to start off making club music. That's all I've been listening to. Of course, you never know. When you want someone to do something, it ends up doing the opposite. It might end up being an accountant." [USA Today]
• Uma Thurman's parents unknowingly hired Tanya Hollander — who is accused of booking call girls at Eliot Spitzer's fave escort service — to manage their upstate yoga center. [NY Post]
• Mariah Carey's husband Nick Cannon has purchased a million dollar ski chalet for Mimi in Aspen. Joint bank account though, right? [Mirror]
• Gabrielle Union says the rumor mill helps her dating life: "Ludacris and Hill Harper are two of my closest male friends, and people always said we were all dating. It's like they were blocking for me. I could date the people I wanted to date and no one ever knew because they thought I was, as somebody said, 'sucking face' with Hill Harper." [Daily Express]
• Ellen Page's Oscar nomination is not enough to get her membership in the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences — the peeps who vote on the Oscars. [NY Mag]
• Cate Blanchett: Getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame this Friday! [Daily Express]
• Akon's trial for endangering the welfare of a minor — stemming from when he threw a 15-year-old kid off the stage in a 2007 concert — has been postponed until December 17. [Perez Hilton]
• Donald Trump's brother, Robert, is getting divorced from socialite and major philanthropist Blaine Trump. [NY Post]
• Naomi Campbell's Russian billionaire boyfriend punched a photographer in the gut. [Page Six]
• We haven't seen Cher in a while, because she's been in Nepal working with orphans. [Page Six]
• Hear Helena Bonham Carter's voice in an MTV ad about domestic abuse. [Guardian]
• Singer Bryan Adams has called the cops over a mother and son stalker team. The pair — possibly from Romania and suffering psychiatric problems — have been following Adams for weeks. [The Sun]
• Did the fact that Axl Rose went "missing" for two months cost Guns N' Roses the number one slot on the charts? [The Sun]
• The set used for the British TV show The Office was destroyed after a massive explosion and fire. [Daily Express]
• "Some people talk about their personal lives a lot. I try not to, unless it's more of a generality. I don't want to broadcast my personal life because I feel it's off-putting. People are like, 'Oh, shut the fuck up. Cry me a river.' Who wants to hear the reality, really? You can't win." — Kate Bosworth. [Daily Expess]
• "I sit with my investors and business managers and accountants looking at the numbers and I’m like, 'Yo, the values of stocks in different areas that I invested in are decreasing!' So I take the loss like everybody else…I’m waking up in a room that was previously Mike Tyson’s bedroom, a fighter who earned over $500 million in his actual career, and when I purchased his house from him he was in bankruptcy…If that’s not a strong enough reminder for you, I don’t know what’s going to remind you to be aware of where you are financially and make conscious decisions…" — 50 Cent, in Forbes. [The.Life Files]

• Amy Winehouse and Blake Formerly Incarcerated: Dunzo. He's left her for a German model; she's admitted that it was never going to last and that they were "only together for sex." Keep in mind that this report comes from a terribly disreputable paper. [News Of The World, Page Six]
• By the by, Blake Fielder-Civil's jail sentence appeal was refused by two judges. [The Sun]
• "Impeccable" sources say Guy Ritchie is banking $70 million of Madonna's money as part of the divorce settlement. That kind of cash will buy a lot of rounds at the pub! [Perez Hilton]
• Oy, Alex Rodriguez is a "Kabbalah school dropout." Madonna will not be happy about this. [MSNBC]
• That was quick: Michael Jackson has settled his court case in which be was being sued by a sheikh. [BBC News]
• Bloody hell. The Twilight sequel has been greenlit. [UPI]

• Brad and Angelina's family is just as cute and perfect in real life as they claim to be. [Page Six]
• OMG Barbara and Jenna Bush helped take Sasha and Malia Obama on a tour of the White House and all of the girls totally jumped on the beds! Says Laura Bush: "They're really tall beds; you need to get a running start." [People]
• Will Leona Lewis team up with Beyoncé and Jay-Z for Barack Obama's inauguration concert? [The Sun]
• Larry Rudolph, Britney Spears' longtime manager, discusses her documentary: "There just came a moment where she decided to get up, brush herself off and move forward. She had hit a low point in her life. She realized that and everybody else realized that. She wanted to get to a better place." Plus, there's A clip! [LA Times]
• Britney made an unexpected appearance in court Friday for a hearing on her ongoing conservatorship. [Yahoo News]
• Jessica Alba ate Nutella crepes at a downtown Manhattan restaurant, where the staff said the meal was "on the house," so she left a $200 tip. Classy. [Page Six]
• In this in-depth piece about Nicole Kidman, we learn that while Keith Urban is on tour and Nic rides around in the tour bus, "She likes to sneak away and go to people's garage sales. 'All I need is a hat, and I go,' she says. She bought little ceramic candle holders at one sale, she says, and embroidered Christmas stockings at another, 'when it wasn't anywhere near Christmastime. I love it.'" [Washington Post]
• Johnny Depp's movie took over a highway in Wisconsin; the detour traffic made a road collapse. Whoops! [AP]
• Ooh: Today is the day that Boy George is due to stand trial; he's accused of assaulting and falsely imprisoning a male escort. [The Star]
• How do people in the Bronx feel about the name Ashlee and Pete Wentz chose for their baby boy? Not impressed. [NY Times]
• "Bronx is beyond precious. I'm over the moon with joy," says Jessica Simpson. "Life is a beautiful miracle. Ashlee and Pete are healthy, happy and enjoying every moment." Cool, cool. Do people really say "over the moon"??? [UPI]
• Nicolette Sheridan, who ended her engagement to Michael Bolton about three months ago, was seen making out with "Hollywood Lothario" David Spade Friday night. Just let that image settle in. [Star]
• Even though Michael Phelps has professed his love for McDonald's, he has a deal promoting Subway. How did the sandwich chain land the deal? [AdAge]
• Illeana Douglas has a (laminated) message for the paparazzi, you should click and see. [DListed]
• Pleasure principle: Janet Jackson is going to take a break from music to focus on having a baby with her boyfriend Jermane Dupri. [Daily Express]
• The economy takes no prisoners: The Tyra Banks Show is moving to the CW's afternoon block after being in syndication for four seasons. Stations have been making budget cuts, so Tyra's production schedule will be cut to 26 weeks from 34. [Reuters]
• Natasha McElhone says her mission now, besides acting and providing for her family, is to complete some of the work her late husband, a doctor, began: "to finish his life, to finish his unfinished business." [LA Times]
• In this interview with Stephen Colbert, he discusses meeting Eleanor Holmes Norton (the District's delegate in Congress): "I felt so dirty. I felt like a piece of meat. I find being a piece of meat very exciting. In my last life, I think I was a veal cutlet." [Washington Post]
• Paris Hilton has been "constantly texting" Benji Madden and trying to show up at clubs where he is supposed to be. [Mirror]
• You can buy a silk couch owned by Jenna Jameson on eBay if you have $9,500 to spare. It's pearl gray. [DListed]
• Even though the economy is in the crapper, there's stuff celebrities won't give up: Mad Men's Elisabeth Moss needs her coffee; Jessica Biel must travel first class; Hilary Swank gets facials; supermodel/ANTM judge Twiggy must have pink Champagne, and much more [WWD]
• Dora The Explorer is getting a new voice: Will kids notice? [Page Six]
• Blind items: 1. Which ex-couple — an actor and a model — still share some aspects of their sex life? Both are known to sleep with a famous Lower East Side topless dancer who has a reputation of never going home alone. 2. Which TV host has such good rapport with his fetching female co-host that his wife has correctly guessed they're having an affair? [Page Six]
• No Doubt: On tour, summer 2009. [People]
• Ben Stiller and Chris Rock: "Israel is better than Hollywood." [AP]
• Dita Von Teese is suing Macmillan Publishers, which printed Patti O'Shea's In Twilight's Shadow, a paranormal romance novel about demon hunting. For some reason, Dita's face is on the cover. She certainly did not give permission. [Yahoo News via E!]
• Now that the Daily Mail has apologized to David Duchovny for printing a story about him having an affair with his tennis instructor, Duchovny's dropped his $1 million lawsuit. [E!]
• Travis Barker is suing the owner and makers of the "defective" Learject that crashed September 19, killing four and leaving him and DJ AM with severe burns. [Yahoo News via E!]
• So you know how Michael Lohan — Lindsay's dad — was going to box for charity? The parole board has stepped in, saying the boxing match can't happen because he spent 20 months in prison for attempted assault. Whoops! [Yahoo News]
• Will the Golden Globes not happen again this year? Last year is was a writers' strike; this year a Screen Actors Guild strike could cancel the event. [Fox News]
• Hollywood veterans and experts from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology are spending $25 million on a lab called The Centre for Future Storytelling. Matt Damon is involved. [Times Of London]
• Lily Allen sought therapy after her miscarriage: "I was in a very, very dark place after the whole thing happened. That was the toughest thing I've had to go through in my life. [Therapy] is really, really helping me. I feel it's getting better and everything's going to be OK." [Mirror]
• Crazy stuff in this Q&A with Quincy Jones: His dad worked as a carpenter for the black mob, and in 1974 Q had two brain aneurysms. Oh, and Q talks about Frank Sinatra: "[He] was one of those guys where he liked you or he didn't. I got to know the Frank that nobody wrote about, the guy who visited Billie Holiday in the hospital to make sure her bills were paid and who took care of Amos and Andy when they were down on their luck. He was a stand-up guy who didn't see color, and that was rare back then." [Newsweek]
• Padma Lakshmi went to see the Foo Fighters and Dave Grohl dragged her on stage; she ended up playing tambourine with the band and getting hit on by Taylor Hawkins. [Page Six]
• Meg Ryan's Bel-Air house is for sale, if you have $19.5 million to spare. You get 6,877 square feet, a pool, spa, and guest house. [TMZ]
• Cedric the Entertainer may not be the obvious first choice for a Broadway drama, but he's getting good buzz for being in the David Mamet play American Buffalo. [NY Times]
• Cops are looking for a "Casanova conman" who claims links to Heath Ledger, Robert De Niro and Keith Urban and has left broken hearts and empty wallets across Australia. [News.com.au]
• Wow. A Keith Richards easy listening album. With a jazz version of "Over The Rainbow. Wow. [Telegraph]
• A doozy of a headline: "Camilla Admits To 'Letting Herself Go' Since She Married Charles... And Vows To Take Up Tai Chi As A New Year's Resolution." Lulz. [Daily Mail]
  
• Warren Beatty is suing over the rights to comic strip detective Dick Tracy. Apparently he's working on a Dick Tracy TV special? Who knew? [Reuters]
• Paul Newman's will was made public and he left his personal property, including real estate, to his wife, Joanne Woodward. His Oscars and other awards went to the Newman's Own Foundation; his airplane and race cars will be sold, with proceeds going to his estate. [AP]
• A Smashing Pumpkins show has been postponed; Billy Corgan's sick! [UPI]
• Billy Zane's parents closed down the Chicago med school they owned, leaving some students in the lurch. [UPI]
• Enya: Might tour for the first time ever. [Reuters]
• Oh, good (oh God?): The Vatican's newspaper has finally forgiven John Lennon for declaring that the Beatles were more famous than Jesus Christ. Plus, The paper says the Beatles made music that is better than "standardized, stereotypical" songs being produced today. [Reuters, AP]
• Speaking of the Beatles, Paul McCartney says his conflict with John Lennon was over before the singer was shot. [UPI]
• investigators say Olivia Newton-John's missing boyfriend probably drowned while on a fishing trip. [News.com.au]
• A man who waved Samurai swords at a Hollywood Scientology building had a "previous relationship" to the church; he was shot and killed by a security guard. [AP]
• Rocker Bryan Ferry is dating his son's ex-girlfriend. The Roxy Music star is 63; the lady in question is 27 and his son is 22. A "pal" says the lady had fling with the son about 5 years ago. Yuck. [The Sun]
• Jodie Sweetin has filed for legal separation from her husband but is "trying to stay positive for Zoie," their 7-month-old daughter. [People]
• Why is a letter Princess Diana wrote to her royal footman on her honeymoon up for sale? And how sad is it that she mentions how "terribly lonely" she is? [Daily Mail]
• Rod Stewart and Penny Lancaster are trying for a baby. Yeah, he's 63, so what? [Mirror]
• "Ever since her Oscar nomination, Sophie Okonedo has been offered plenty of 'mini-skirted girlfriend' parts. But she'd much rather stay home and do nothing." [Telegraph]
• Blackadder: a Christmas comeback. [The Star]
• A New York rabbi paid $2500 at an auction to go out with ice skating queen Oksana Baiul. He says: "Well, I'm single, it's for charity, and she seems like a nice Jewish girl. I guess I'm the luckiest guy in my congregation." [Page Six]
• "My son would have been at that rally in Chicago when the first African- American president was elected, and I'm sure he would have gone up onstage and grabbed the microphone as only he could." — Ol' Dirty Bastard's mom. [Page Six]
• "I got drunk and lied to him. I said 'I've lost my keys and I can't wake my mum. Can I stay on your sofa?' He went to brush his teeth. I took my clothes off and jumped in his bed. It's the only way I can ever get together with people." — Lily Allen on her seduction technique. [Mirror]
• "I laugh when people say we don't get on. Of course we row. But we are best friends as well as partners. I don't think we'd know what to do without each other." — Kate "Jordan" Price on her relationship with her husband, Peter Andre. [The Sun]
• "Axl's a friend, and I don't want to compromise that. But as for 'fun' crazy: He wrote his (half) brother, Stuart, a $25,000 check every day to throw these lavish theme parties. It was like, we're in Indianapolis, so there were Formula One cars everywhere, with all the girls dressed up in pit-crew uniforms. It was decadence at the highest level I'd ever seen, a Caligula kind of outlandishness. There were orgies, sure. Was I involved? Yes. Well, I was in the same room — we'll leave it at that." — Lars Ulrich on being on tour with Axl Rose and Guns N Roses back in the day. [Perez Hilton]
• "Something else comes out of you when you become a parent and, as you get older, you start to see more character in your face. Now, when I look at myself, I just see somebody at peace, and I see a mom, and I see my own relatives in my face – and that’s a kind of beauty that exists for everybody and doesn’t disappear." — Angelina Jolie. [Daily Mail]

• Kate Moss emerged from a bar, giggling and a little tipsy, and announced: "I'm getting married!" Jamie "Hotel" Hince of The Kills is the lucky guy. [The Sun]
  
• Is Britney's paparazzi moment finally over? "Over the weekend, there were less than a half dozen covering Britney," says an agency head. Yet there were 30 in the pack covering Miley Cyrus. Most of them were Britney regulars, but they want something new and fresh. It's moved on to Miley." Oh, dear. [Rush & Molloy]
  
• The New York Times on Britney's appearance on How I Met Your Mother: "Ms. Spears showed that for a few minutes she can play someone else. But she was not entrusted with an opportunity to show she is herself again." [NY Times]
  
• Tyra Banks isn't getting along with ANTM photo shoot creative director Jay Manuel, only wants to show up on judging days and could leave the show altogether — she wants to put all of her energy behind her talk show. [MSNBC]
  
• Amy Winehouse: Going back to rehab? A source says there are too many temptations in London and her management considered flying her to a clinic in Israel, or maybe one in Cape Town, South Africa. [The Sun]

• A new poll has named Ellen DeGeneres the top TV host — over Oprah. Ms. Winfrey, you better start dancing! [Yahoo News]
• Michelle Williams' father is urging Heath Ledger's father to be honest about Heath's finances. "Come clean," Larry Williams says. "Say where the income went and where the assets are." [Mirror]
• Usher's new wife: Seen "guarding" her man "like a watchdog" from the other sexy women on the set of his new video. [Page Six]
• Fergie is not pregnant, says her modeling agent. Gee, thanks, and we know it's not at all in your best business interest to say otherwise. [Page Six]
• If Axl Rose releases his long-awaited album, Chinese Democracy this year, Dr. Pepper will give everyone in America a free can of Dr. Pepper. Or you could just buy a can and listen to "Patience." (I been walking the streets at night, just tryin' to get it right...) [Page Six]
• In New York City, Lower East Side bar crawlers are dodging the Olsen twins' black Escalades. [Page Six]
• After seeing her on Dancing With The Stars, a top cosmetic surgeon is claiming Priscilla Presley's botched face job could have been avoided: "There is no movement at all in her face, no expression. No expert in Botox would leave you like that. Her mouth is uneven. It's almost like a Bell's palsy on one side, as if there's been nerve damage." Another writer says Presley looks like "a bulldog bitten by wasps." Ouch. [Rush & Molloy]
• Apparently the "doctor" who injected Priscilla used industrial-grade silicone used to lubricate auto parts. Larry King's wife and Lionel Richie's wife also saw this phony doc. [TMZ]
• Famous Cajun chef Paul Prudhomme has been shot! Except the bullet did no damage — it just grazed his skin. The chef was cooking at a Louisiana golf course at the time of the incident, and there's no information as to where the .22 bullet came from. [TMZ]
• Singer Nate Dogg has pleaded guilty to aggravated trespassing and battery and can not own a gun for 10 years. Bad for his image, good for the world at large. [TMZ]
• Ryan Phillippe says seeing ex-wife Reese Witherspoon with new man Jake Gyllenhaal is "bizarre" but he tries to avoid looking at pictures of the two together. [People]
• Renee Zellweger moves so often she feels like a gypsy. "I'm never bored. The whole world is home. It's my playground. I can go and play anywhere and I love it. I like to move along. I had a really nice house in Bel Air and I was paying this huge mortgage for my cat." [Mirror]
• JK Rowling may be forced to defend her ownership of Harry Potter — she wants to block the publication of a Harry Potter encyclopedia; her publisher says her intellectual property rights do not exend that far. Banisho competiva titlo! [Mirror]
• Helen Mirren has won an award for "promoting healthy nudity" from the USA Naturist Society. She appeared naked in Calendar Girls and sunbathes naked at home. [Mirror]
• Brooke Burke's son was born March 5, but she still hasn't decided on a name. Her other kids are named Rain, Neriah, and Sierra. Any suggestions? [People]