[Istanbul, December 3. Image via Splash.]

Sara the saxophone-playing walrus makes the crowd flip-per at the Istanbul Dolphinarium in Turkey. — Splash

Watch Sara play the saxophone!

Here Is A Walrus Playing A Small Saxophone [Best Week Ever]

Via These Are Only Words' Flickr

Via J03P's Flickr.

[New York, November 12. Image via Bauer-Griffin.]

Image via Fukusuke-Pon's Flickr, more here.

Pictured: The Baby Pygmy Hippo That Brings New Hope For The Endangered Species [Daily Mail]
Rare Pygmy Hippo Offers Hope [BBC]
White House Pets: Hippo, Gator And 'Satan' [CNN]

[New York, November 5. Image via Splash.]

Knives! Needles! A pencil, a safety pin, coins, jewelry and a rubber duck. Oh, and there's the snake who swallowed a golf ball. Probably thought it was an egg.

When I was younger, we had a family cat who liked to chew underwear. Dirty underwear. Specifically the crotch. Anna says her cats are the opposite: "When they see dirty socks or underwear on the floor, they walk by and cover it up, like it's something gross in a litter box." My family has had lots of different dogs, and not one of them has ingested a pair of socks or a rubber duck. Have any of you had pups with odd appetites (and, one assumes, subsequent tummy aches)?

(Aside: Check out this display at the Glore Psychiatric Museum in St. Joseph, Missouri. It's an imaginative arrangement of 1,446 items swallowed by a HUMAN patient and removed from her intestines and stomach. She died during surgery from bleeding caused by 453 nails, 42 screws, safety pins, spoon tops, and salt and pepper shaker tops.)

Bow-ow! Dogs Swallow Pins, Pens, Crazy Canine X-rays [NY Daily News]
Display Of Bad Things Swallowed [BoingBoing]

[Image via HMR Print]

[New York, October 23. Image via Splash.]

Just call him Jaws. Baby walrus Akituusaq shows off his new set of titanium false teeth at his home at the New York Aquarium. The 16-month-old Pacific walrus, nicknamed 'Aki', was fitted with the crowns by Wildlife Conservation Society Global Health Program vets working with a dental consultant to protect his tusks from damage during growth. A spokesperson for the Aquarium said: "Aki seems to be adjusting well to his new teeth."

[Image via Getty.]

A couple of mating moor frogs (rana arvalis) are seen in a pond in the suburbs of the eastern town of Leipzig, Germany. The male moor frog (top) becomes blue in the spawning season. — Getty Images

This past weekend, New York City played host to the CFA-IAMS Cat Championship, where felines from all four corners of the country were judged on aesthetics and athletics. We sent FourFour's Rich Juzwiak — Pot Psychologist, beloved pop culture chronicler and father to the feline internet sensation named Winston — to capture the craziness on videotape.

From what I can tell, cat shows and dog shows couldn't be more different. It's like comparing apples to oranges... or cats to dogs, for that matter. Or so it would seem, as I roamed the floor of Madison Square Garden's Expo Center at this weekend's CFA-IAMS Cat Championship.

Whereas a dog show has a pageant-like, almost sterile vibe wrapped up in etiquette and handler-glamor, a cat show is more like a flea market (no parasitic pun intended). Sure, it involves formal competing (a Russian Blue named Blade Runner took this year's top prize), but the slow-moving, quiet judging is usually off in the periphery. It's the owners and their cats (often kept in gaudy gift-basket-like encasements) waiting in the middle who command center stage (so to speak). And damn it, that's where they belong.

As I talked to people who've devoted their lives to their felines (and have the sweatshirts and Crocs to prove it!), I encountered none of the aloofness their pet of choice supposedly exhibits. In fact, all I had to do was point a camera at them to get them to talk all about their animals and the cat-show scene (it isn't catty, one woman assured me). No one even so much as hissed at me when I asked about the "crazy cat person" stereotype and whether it applied to them. Some of the friendliness no doubt stems from the fact that most of them are breeders and therefore salespeople, but I felt no pressure to buy after they'd given me some of their time and good humor. They're virtually dog-like! Which, bizarrely enough, is how many describe their cats. Video below.

Related: 'Barack' Beats 'McCain' For Purrfect Presidency [MSNBC]
Cats Being Cathletes: An Afternoon At The CFA-IAMS Cat Championship [Deadspin]

[Image via Getty.]

A pair of African elephants mating in Masai-Mara game reserve in Kenya. — AP

Earlier: Happy Hump Day!

Dr. Wensley adds: "Cats and dogs, like young children, are sensitive to adult human emotions, and when these become tense or unpredictable this can cause stress-related health problems in our pets." So, depending on the situation, you should probably heed the doc's advice: "We would urge owners to make arrangements for their pets that minimize disruption to their pets' routines and allow their pets' lives to remain as stable as possible."

Of course, each scenario is different, just like each pet is different. Especially since a new mathematical model shows how and why animal personalities develop. Just like humans, some animals are routine and rigid, while others are curious, flexible and interested in change. For some reason, the idea that an animal has a personality seems new to science, which seems bizarre. But back to custody battles: My ex and I had a cat together, but when we broke up, I knew I was leaving them both. Have you ever had to have a custody agreement for a pet?

Pets Suffer From Stress Of Marriage Break-Ups [Telegraph]
Animals Have Personalities, Too [MSNBC]

Red Panda via LoquaciousD's Flickr.

Additional cute: When Puppies Play, It’s Ladies First [MSNBC]

[Image via Cute Overload]

[England, October 1. Images via Splash.]

Some tortoises get frisky in Preston, England. Despite "Bob's" best efforts, his partner "Jane" looked less than enthralled by the ordeal. — Splashnews

[London, September 29. Image via Splash.]

[Images via Cute Overload.]

Additional cute: Baby squirrels rescued from Hurricane Gustav.
Also: A clip about pets and the economy. (Starring my sister.)

Caption:

"Oh god. I just spent three quarters of my day licking myself. I just sit here, with a bowl of water, some toys and my urges – lonely one minute and satisfied the next. Such a wicked paradox. I need to get out. I need to meet people. But I’m happy this way. It feels good. So good. But my crotch shouldn’t define me. Was it the way I was raised? Did my dad bury his face in his crotch for hours on end? Not dad. I never smelt it on his breath. Well maybe once, but I can’t be sure that was crotch. The guy ate garbage like it was going out of style. But really, some pages are better left unturned. Am I the only one? I doubt it. That Rottweiler probably treats his nether regions like a buffet. Look at me. I’m justifying my lack of discipline by making up stories about other dogs I don’t even know. I need a drink. Then I need to lick my crotch. More like want. Is that selfish? Self-pleasuring myself for half a day? Screw it. I’m going in. If my owner could do it, he would. So it’s perfectly natural. Isn’t it? I need a distraction. That ball looks okay. Oh crap. I need something new. Something that doesn’t involve my crotch. It’s all I’ve got. My walker’s cool, but I can’t lick his crotch. It’s gonna take everything I’ve got to make it through the night. Just one night."

Caption: "Sit."

Caption: "Cat food from Rutan. Irresistable."

Caption:

Should I sniff her butt? Will she mind if I sniff her butt? What will it say about me if I sniff his butt? Maybe I’m gay? Should I question sniffing butts so much? Do other dogs sniff as many butts as I do? How many butts have I sniffed this week? I’m guessing it’s a lot if I’m questioning it so much. I love sniffing butts. I need to sniff one right now. There aren’t any around. I have to get a hold of myself. Who am I kidding? I need a butt and I need it now. Now. Good god. Am I living a life that’s guided by butt sniffing? I am. My parent’s warned me. I didn’t listen. Like a cheap tramp. A whore. I’m a butt-sniffing whore. What if I tried to cut down? Nothing heavy. Just a few sniffs a day. I can do that. I know I can. I’ve done it before. But do I really want to? I mean, that’s what we do. We sniff butts. No one looks down on me for it. There was that guy who gave me a look while I was in mid-sniff. Who is he to judge me for sniffing a butt? Maybe I’m just being paranoid. I get like that when I haven’t sniffed a butt. I’ll stop cold turkey. But not now. The fever’s too strong. A wiff will get me through the night. Just one, heartfelt inhale of the poodle across the street and I’ll be satisfied. I love how she resists at first and then sticks it out with reckless abandon. What a slut. Wait. Why is she a slut? I’m the one going in there. That coy little look she gives me when she walks down the street. Oh, I’m sniffing that butt. Count on it."

Caption: Think you're my master? Last time I checked, you're the one picking up my poop."

When the mice are away, the cats will play... A UK company has unveiled these flatpack feline toys - including a fire engine, fighter plane and a TANK that your pet kitty can play in. The Cat Playhouse range is designed by London-based firm Suck UK. According to the company, "cats love to play in cardboard boxes and these are just about the most fun cardboard boxes you will find." The toys cost GBP £15 / $30 USD each.

— SplashNews.com

[Image via AP.]

A harbor seal (Phoca vitulina) appears waving with its flipper to an animal of the same species a at the harbor seal station in Friedrichskoog at the North Sea, northern Germany. — AP

[Beverly Hills, September 3. Image via Flynet.]

[Image via AP.]

Ms. Horikoshi divorced her husband who had asked her to be stay-at-home mom; she wanted to pursue her career. "I don't want a family, I want to continue to work hard. I don't need help, I don't need a husband. I can do everything by myself," she says. "But sometimes I feel lonely, and now when I come back to my apartment, I can see two dogs." Dogs, not kids, okay?

Of course, there are downsides to the pet craze: The Japanese love everything tiny and kawaii (cute), so there are puppies born with horrible deformities due to overbreeding. Also, there are some all night pet stores in Tokyo's sleazy Roppongi district that are used for schemes: a "hostess" will ask a drunk businessdude to buy her a little dog; the next day, she will bring the dog back to the shop in exchange for cash. The shop keeps a cut.

But back to the cute: Since people are integrating pets fully into their lives, the market responds. Kimonos, yukatas, cookies, omu-rice dishes… for dogs. Pricey stuff, and pet owners are snapping it yup.

Let's be honest. A dog doesn't talk back. A cat never grows up to get hooked on heroin and resent you. A dog doesn't need college tuition or bat mitzvah money. I suspect that some people might see Toshiko Horikoshi pushing her puppies in a pram and snicker and think she's insane. Think she wishes she had babies. But she's a doctor who knows what she's doing. She doesn't want kids. She wants dogs. And that's okay. We're living in an overcrowded world where women are finally allowed to make choices. And if your choice is to baby a puppy or kitten instead of a human, who cares? There's a stigma of "crazy cat ladies" — maybe dating waaaay back to when women who were "too close" to animals were thought to be "communicating" with "familiars" in the animal world and therefore deemed witches?

Unlike spoiling a child — where the rest of the world has to deal with the bratty maladjusted results, isn't lavishing attention, affection, and yeah, cash on a dog or cat a victimless crime? So why do people feel the need to make pet-crazy women feel guilty?

(Related: I want that freaking pomeranian pictured up top. Kawaii!)

Preposterously Pampered Pooches [Tokyo Times]
In Dog We Trust [ABC News]