Rachel Griffiths' hint of leopard feels like the kind of "fun touch" Stacey and Clinton are always pushing for classic basics.


Trying to decide what contributes the air of Loehmann's back-room to the normally-flawless Angela Bassett. Is it the wrap? The straps? The open-toed with hose?


On the one hand, Eloisa Dudamel's rather standard gown could be more interesting. But how amazing does she look in this color?


Dana Delaney also gets major points for working "Flaming June" - even if the gown itself isn't setting the world on fire.


Kelley Phleger's seriously unflattering shoe-dress combo kind of plays up the worst aspects of both.


Kind of dig Rita Wilson's subdued take on the disco-glitz trend.


Deborah Borda represents classic concert-wear.


And it's fun how Jenna Elfman's playing with pattern - few are this bold in maternity.


I don't feel that Sophia Bush has ever gotten sufficient recognition for her track record of impeccable dress.


I love that Jason Schwartzman is here, even if he's looking a tad Rushmore.


Ginny Mancini (with Quincy Jones)'s sleeves are the evening's highlight.

[Images via Getty]

The Good:
This whole evocation of earlier recession epochs is an odd one, but if you gotta do boho? The always-stunning Keisha Whitaker!


We're all over the bandage dress. But then sometimes you see one in a vibrant color, like Viola Davis, and there's no arguing with it.


Marisa Tomei channels Betty Catroux, never a bad idea.


I think we were rough on Jurnee Smollett earlier this week, which I hate, so it's with great pleasure that we welcome her back to her rightful place in Good!


Why the fruit isn't this amazing lady identified?! She is sporting harem pants, tunic, Conan-style belt, and what's either a knot of frabric or the world's teensiest turban!


With Reservations...
Sharon Stone: your dress is quite something. The shoes confuse everything. Tell us why?


When it comes to the lovely Angela Bassett, the fit's just not great.


What Say You?
Basically I just really like Alfre Woodard and don't want to put her in the Bad (because as we know tha's the worst thing that can happen to anyone) so I'm counting on you to convince me that this doesn't resemble a nightie!


Sure, there's a lot one could say about Shondrella Avery's getup...but points for making me smile?

[Images via Getty]

• Angelina Jolie started working on Salt yesterday, and her character, rogue CIA operative Evelyn A. Salt, has a couple of different looks:

So far we're seeing raven-haired and blonde. Oh, and here's an interesting quote from producer Lorenzo di Bonaventura, about reworking the script originally intended for Tom Cruise: "I had no idea how complex it would be," he says. "We had to rethink the whole notion of how a man vs. a woman operates in the business world, in personal relationship and in friendships." This should be interesting. [USA Today]

• Well, this just isn't nice: After reports came out that Guy Ritchie calls Madonna "It," Madge has been sent 100 copies of the horror movie Stephen King's It. "She's received the packages at all of her addresses so she suspects they are from somebody she knows. And she is furious," a source claims. [News.com.au]
• Krishna Siqueira is the ex-gf of Madonna's new "friend," Jesus Luz. She says: "He is a wonderful person. We were dating and then the magazine shoot came up. Then came the story that he was with her [Madonna]. We took some time out because we imagined he was going away to live and could not continue long-distance dating." Krishna says Jesus is not with Madonna for the publicity: "He's not that kind of person." [Daily Mail]
• Rihanna's family: Apparently not happy about her reconciliation with Chris Brown. "Everyone wants them to take a break, to cool off," a relative of Rihanna tells People. "No one wants them back together." The couple has left Miami and is now in L.A. [People]
• Lindsay Lohan's New York apartment, which she never actually slept in, is for sale. You get two bedrooms, two bathrooms, floor-to-ceiling windows, and an unobstructed view of the Statue of Liberty for the low, low price of $1,200,000. Any takers? [Gothamist]
• Oh, Christ. Lindsay Lohan's crazy ass father has started contacting Lily Allen. Lily says: "I got a Twitter from her dad saying 'Dear Lily, I think you have an alcohol problem that needs addressing. From Michael Lohan.' I was, like, leave me alone." This is not good. [The Sun]
• What's this? Michael Lohan had lunch with Courtenay Semel? A spy says it was superserious: "There was no laughing and no smiling." What could they have been talking about??? [E!]
• Nadya Suleman, mother of 14, says her original six kids are already jealous of the octuplets. When a friend showed the kids a picture of their new siblings, "they hit the picture," Suleman says. Oh, and by the way, she has a new house: "It's safe. It's about 2,800 square feet, four bedrooms. I don't want anyone to know where we are. I have trust issues. I know there are a lot of emotionally disturbed people." [MSNBC Scoop]
• George Clooney texted ex Lisa Snowdon and it made the paper. [Daily Express]
• WTF. Lauren Conrad has a novel?!?! The tome, L.A. Candy, is about Jane, a girl who moves to L.A. and unexpectedly becomes the star of a reality television show. Shocking. [People]
• Britney's family is excited for her tour, which will include a three-ring circus setup and magic tricks. Are they the only ones? [People]
• Wait: Madonna might join Britney on stage. That would be good. [Gatecrasher]
• Unsolicited uterus update: Mariah Carey is not pregnant. Her "baby" is her dog, Jack, and he may be getting his own reality show. Barf. No, wait: Arf. [Fox 411]
• Amy Winehouse has moved out of Camden to a gated house in the suburbs. Though she seems to be planning a "massive Camden pub crawl." [Daily Mail]
• Sharon Osbourne has been sued by the woman whose hair she grabbed on Rock of Love: Charm School. The charges? Battery, negligence and infliction of emotional distress. Seems like the emotional distress part is from just being on a reality show, no? [TMZ]
• Did you catch Jimmy Fallon's first show last night? Apparently Robert DeNiro, who rarely does talk shows, was pretty funny. [Fox 411]
• Mickey Rourke danced with a bathroom attendant. [Gatecrasher]
• Whee! Ashley Jensen, aka Christina, will return to Ugly Betty. She announced she was leaving in January, but now says: "It's time I challenged myself professionally. They haven't killed by character off, so I'll be back at some point." Her Scottish brogue would be sorely missed. [The Sun]
• Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester is inside the new issue of In Style and in this photo, she looks hungover and strung out. [Just Jared]
• Matthew McConaughey is officially in the record business! He's producing a Bermudian roots-reggae artist, naturally. McConaughey says of Mishka: "My one-liner to him is ‘Look, man, I think your music needs to be heard by more ears than it has. I've heard it. I love it. Anybody I've ever turned on to your music ends up loving it.'" Then he put the bong down. [Rolling Stone]
• Danny Boyle may helm the next Bond flick. Upgrade? [The Sun]
• ABC TV series Life On Mars has been canceled. [Variety]
• Uh-oh: The food may have been spoiled at Elton John's Oscar party; some guests ended up "vomiting for days." [Page Six]
• Angela Bassett will make her directorial debut with United States, an indie feature in which a prominent black literary figure writes a faux autobiography from the perspective of a barely literate hoodlum to decry what is wrong with the glorification of "ghetto" culture… and the book is a hit. [Hollywood Reporter]
• Natalie Imbruglia is not, repeat, not dating Prince Harry. She says: "He was just at my birthday party. That was it. I met him for about two seconds." [Daily Express]
• Sienna Miller is trying to charm people in the film industry in L.A. after being shunned over her affair with Balthazar Getty. Good luck! [Daily Express]
• John Travolta and Kelly Preston have written a letter to Lady Lake, FL, thanking the town for its support after their son Jett died. [UPI]
• Someone broke the windows in Jay Kay from Jamiroquai's Ferrari, but it's hard to care. [Daily Mail]
• Check out this Ricky Gervais meltdown, in which he is not pulling a "Christian Bale," even if that is the headline. [LA Times]
• You know how Bruce Willis is being sued for "walking off the set" of a flick he was supposed to direct? He's calling the suit "frivolous and without merit." [E!]
• The Flaming Lips track, "Do You Realize," is now Oklahoma's official rock song. [AP]
• Spinal Tap: Live! The "Unwigged and Unplugged" tour starts April 17 in Vancouver. [AP]
• Simply Red's plane was forced to make an emergency landing en route from Buenos Aires to Brazil, but everyone is okay. Holding back the years tears! [Reuters]
• If you're living on a prayer, get psyched for the Bon Jovi book which comes out in the fall — an "insider portrait" with previously unpublished photographs and text by the band members. [AP]
• Blind item! "Which sexy NYC-based celeb's pickup line needs a little improvement? 'Have we met?' he asks. 'Have we had sex? No? Do you want to?'" [Gatecrasher]
• Bad news: Fred Durst is making a comeback. [Page Six]
• Jim Carrey's daughter Jane has a band called the Jane Carrey band. [The Life Files]
• Legal troubles for Sean Connery: Did he profit from a loan to a former friend? [Daily Mail]
• "Because this album is so sonically different than anything I've done before and captures many flavors of my emotional life and voice, it needed an entirely new name. 'Terra Incognita' means unknown territory — and that's where I wanted to go musically. The guitars are more wild and atmospheric. The groove is dark and deep and allow for a lot of sonic contrasts. It took me five years to really cut my teeth both as a performer and as a songwriter and I wanted to break all the habits I'd gotten used to and let songs develop out of a groove or simple piano notes and melody." — Juliette Lewis, on her new album with her new band, the New Romantiques, who are replacing her former band, The Licks. [NME]
• "I think that criticism is a good thing because it teaches you to (ask) some questions." — Juliette Binoche, on her new dance performance, which the Times of London called "intermittently excruciating." [Breitbart]
• "I'm coping mostly and I'm mostly clean, I won't lie to you it is a struggle. My dad and I are estranged. In his mind if I'm still ­using in any way then I'm not his son. But my mum speaks to me ­secretly. I try and wrap myself up enough so that it doesn't get to me and I don't feel anything but really of course it gets to me. I love the man and I grew up kind of idolising him. It's breaking my heart that for him the be-all and end-all of our relationship is whether or not there's something despicable in my bloodstream. I'd love to just go to football with him like we used to or just go for a drink and be a son and him a father." — Pete Doherty. [Daily Express]

[Los Angeles, January 22. Image via WENN]

• Aretha Franklin is getting ready to sing for Barack Obama at the inauguration. She met him in 2005 at the funeral of Rosa Parks and says: "I think they expect between three and five million people at the swearing-in. Although I have sung for many, many people - hundreds of thousands - I have never sung for that kind of number, but I am absolutely looking forward to it." [Times of London]
• Kerry Washington, who was the national co-chair for the Vote for Change initiative, is in D.C. for the inauguration and has already attended an Essence magazine lunch and hit some cocktail parties. [USA Today]
• Yesterday's "We Are One" concert at the Lincoln Memorial featured Beyoncé, Stevie Wonder, Bruce Springsteen, Jon Bon Jovi and U2. Watching in the VIP section: Blair Underwood and family; Jay-Z, Angela Bassett. [MSNBC Scoop, Washinton Post]
• In D.C.: J.Lo, Marc Anthony, Shakira, Rosie Perez, Wilmer Valderrama, George Lopez, Geraldo Rivera, Rosario Dawson and others at the Latino Inaugural Ball. Lopez and Anthony were seen kissing. [Politico]
• At the Declare Yourself event: Jessica Alba, Ben Affleck, Jamie Foxx, Hayden Panettiere, Rick Schroeder, Sarah Silverman, John Legend and Lindsay Lohan. [Politico]
• Oprah's best friend Gayle King is in D.C. too, she went to the BET Honors VIP reception. She's got her own XM radio show. [WaPo]
• By the by, J. Lo and Marc are showing "no visible signs of marital distress" despite the tabloid headlines. [MSNBC]
• Picture this: 50 Cent was performing at a Vitamin Water party at the Sundance Film Festival and it was Jim Carrey's birthday, so Fiddy invitved Carrey onto the stage where he busted out some dance moves. [Gatecrasher]
• Mariah Carey got wasted at a Sundance event her husband was DJing. [Gatecrasher]
• Kate Winslet says of The Reader and Revolutionary Road: "I've been very lucky this year. It's extraordinary playing two such wonderful women." Understatement! [Telegraph]
• Leonardo DiCaprio says of filming with Kate Winslet and Sam Mendes: "It felt like a kind of a family — a sort of weird twisted family." [Mirror]
• Ashton Kutcher's blog on The Huffington Post is about a Presidential Pledge. He writes: "We have gathered a group of individuals who share the courage to pledge to our president, and the world at large, what it is that they are willing to do, give, or sacrifice, in an effort to help their fellow man. Our hope is that this effort will inspire others to do the same, with individuals posting their initiatives within their communities. This is not a selfless utopian action. In fact it is a very selfish one. By improving the lives of those who surround us we will in effect improve our own." [HuffPo]
• If you haven't already seen the sad spectacle that is Joaquin Phoenix rapping, click for video. [E!]
• Also a sad spectacle: Joaquin's beard. [People]
• Jeremy Piven's publicist is upset that the producers of Speed-The-Plow have filed a grievance against Piven and says it's outrageous. "He withdrew from the play due to medical necessity on the advice of his doctors, Samantha Masts insists. She also notes he hasn't even been paid for his Broadway stint yet. [UPI, E!]
• This long, long story is about how, with all of her projects, Victoria is beating David and emerging as the "winner" in the Beckham marriage. [Times Of London]
• Any chance Tina Fey's Sarah Palin character will show up on Amy Poehler's new TV show? "No, no, no." [E!]
• The death of Mark Ruffalo's brother, Scott, has been ruled a homicide. [Gatecrasher]
• Blind item! "Which odd couple better hope their mutual spouses don’t discover that they shared a recent night of passion in Las Vegas?" [Gatecrasher]
• Christina Aguilera and husband Jordan Bratman threw Where The Wild Things Are-themed birthday party for their son, Max, on Saturday. [People]
• Is Kate Middleton, Prince William's ladylove, coming to New York? She's spoken with Anna Wintour and Tom Ford and is thinking about working at a major fashion house. [Daily Express]
• Paris Hilton really is BFFs with the winner of her MTV show, Brittany Flickinger: "I love her. She’s slept at my house every night for the last four weeks." But! Paris's dream best friend? Angelina Jolie. "She’s strong but gorgeous and uses her fame for good to make a big difference in the world. That’s a great quality. I’d have a lot in common with her." Um, LOL? [Pop Dirt]
• Isla Fisher is trying to plot her wedding to Sacha Baron Cohen: "[It] has been difficult to plan," she tells Allure. "It is very important to me to have a beautiful ritual celebrated with all my family and friends… when you are in the public eye, to keep that private and to make it happen without it being really visible is really difficult." Plus, Bruno could show up! [SMH]
• Kate Moss's birthday party was a "monumental medieval bash," but the young lady at the door accidentally let some random people in and got yelled at by Kate. [This Is London]
• Jamie Hince has purchased some unconventional artwork for Kate Moss's 35th birthday: A Parisian graffiti artist will spray the pieces directly on the walls of Kate's house. [The Sun]
• Whoops! Katy Perry was accidentally given the International Song Of THe Year award in Cannes, due to an error in the vote-counting. The real winner? Rihanna. [News.com.au]
• Boy George is in prison, where, says an inmate, "He’s not been crying but seems to be in another world and sleeps a lot. They’ve put him in a cell with a Rasta guy to protect him and there is always a guard close by." [The Sun]
• The Jonas Brothers are getting their own TV show, and it's inspired by the Beatles… and the Monkees. The concept: The bros play boys in a band trying to live normal lives at a regular school, despite being trailed by throngs of ardent fans. A hard day's night? [Reuters]
• By the by, Nick Jonas lost a ping-pong game to Sasha and Malia Obama. [UPI]
• Uh-oh: Three buses carrying this year's 52 Miss America got lost on the ladies' first night in Las Vegas. [UPI]
• Sexy spoiler alert: This season of Lost will be extremely Sawyer-centric. And! Oh! New video sneak peek! [E!]
• Here's an interview with Lost's Michael Emerson, aka Benjamin Linus. [E!]
• Hmm, Jay Jopling, the dude that Lily Allen's been hanging all over, is actually married to edgy British artist Sam Taylor-Wood, and now she's facing a £100m divorce. [Daily Mail]
• Even though Guy Ritchie and Robert Downey Jr. have become friends while shooting Sherlock Holmes, Downey is angry that Ritchie is making him wear four-inch platforms in his shoes to give his character some height. A source says: "Rob is stumbling around a lot and cursing Guy over the silly shoes." [The Sun]
• ZOMG, Courtney Love is trying to set up Frances Bean with Twilight's Robert Pattinson! [Daily Mail]
• Portia de Rossi says marriage has changed her life. "It's legal, and it's real, so there's that kind of formality to it that makes it very valid," she says. "I think the emotions that went with that as a gay woman kind of surprised me – that I would be that relieved to have my mother be present at the ceremony to bless the union, and to call [Ellen] her daughter-in-law." [People]
• Congrats to Brothers & Sisters star Rachel Griffiths, who is pregnant with her third child. [UPI]
• The Michael Jackson musical, Thriller Live, has hit the boards in London's West End, but doesn't reference Jackson's backstory. Plus! Producer Paul Walden speaks of MJ in the past tense, saying, "Here was an artist who had an amazing career." [Wall Street Journal]
• FYI: In NYC's horse carriage battle, Liam Neeson is all for them and Alec Baldwin is against. [Page Six]
• CNN's Soledad O'Brien lives in a NYC apartment building where one of her neighbors has a mastiff. Apparently O'Brien is not a fan of the dog due to its "size, slobbering, shedding, drooling, gassiness and odors" — and got the animal — and its owners — kicked out of the building. Sad face! O'Brien has a cat. [ Gothamist]
• Brody Jenner and his Playboy Playmate girlfriend like to stay home and bake cookies. Her Christmas gift to him was a custom surfboard emblazoned with a photo from her Playmate of the Year spread and the Playboy Bunny logo. Classy! [People]
• Alex Trebek is hosting something called Canada's Next Prime MInister. Is that how they do it up north? [Yahoo News]
• Eliza Dushku is developing a biopic about the late photographer Robert Mapplethorpe, and her brother, Nate, will star. Keeping the homoeroticism in the family! [E!]
• John Cleese, 69, has a 27-year-old girlfriend named Barbie, and she's telling this paper about seeing him naked and having sex with him and says he has the "package of a 19-year-old." [Mirror]
• Look for Cher to star in a comedy in which Johnny Knoxville is her love interest. She's 62; he's 35. Fox 411]
• Madonna's new promo shot in which she is wearing thigh-high bondage boots and white fishnet tights, a thong and a top that resembles a surgical bandage is really not that raunchy, considering. [Telegraph]
• Check out Eddie Murphy getting friendly with a blonde on the dancefloor. [Concrete Loop]
• Apparently what the world needs now is another Gordon Gekko movie. [Telegraph]
• "They photoshopped the crap out of me! I don’t care — whoever she is, she looks great!" — Kelly Clarkson, commenting on the photograph on the cover of her new single. [Gatecrasher]
• "When I started filming Lost I was 24 and I’ll be 30 this summer… When you’re in your 20s, men tend to see you as a piece of ass, and women will probably regard you as young and cute. But once you reach your 30s, suddenly people are going to take you seriously and women are more like, 'She’s reached maturity and she’s going to start sagging like the rest of us!'" — Evangeline Lily. [Mirror]
• "I always wanted to kill Hitler, I hated him. As a child studying history and looking at documents, I wondered, why didn't someone stand up and try to stop it?" — Tom Cruise. [Reuters, USA Today]
• "This is me saying this is who I am. This is my story. After all the years of reading scripts and reading lines, this is my chance to do something straight from the heart and put it out there. When I was young I liked punk rock music but then I discovered rap. I love the storytelling aspect of hip-hop." — Joaquin Phoenix. [People]
• "Obama's a unique figure in history. The fundamental American-ness of his story and the fact that he represents for many, many people an image and a view of the country that felt like it was so long missing in action…This place we've been talking about, singing about... it's alive. It isn't dead. It exists… There's always tomorrow and, hopefully, you can use the word 'hopefully' now. You can live here, and use the word 'hopefully'. So that's pretty nice." — Bruce Springsteen. [Guardian]

The Good:

We get it: you're a goddess.


I cannot get over Dakota Fanning. This kid is amazing! She doesn't put a foot wrong!


It's so nice to see how chic Eva Longoria can look when she breaks out of her usual mold!


As we all know, Kristin Scott-Thomas lives in Paris and has gone totally native; it shows!


Digging Kristen Bell's easy slip.


Looks like Rosemarie DeWitt shares my weakness for 20's bohemian chic!


Elizabeth Banks' spun gold may be my favorite look of the night!


I once read that Diane Lane always does this simple shape: you can see why.


I like to think of Angela Bassett's sort of elegance as "opera singer chic!"


Penelope Cruz always makes it look so easy.


Laura Dern's got the height to rock this 60's glam.


The Bad:
What stylist talked Anne Hathaway into wearing an enormous napkin tucked into her belt?


Look, I get what Katy Perry's going for, I do. But this is verging on costume shop!


Sarah Silverman looks so uncomfortable.


Sure, Amanda Bynes looks smokin', but I'm officially over the "sexy costume" that is the bandage.


Sally Hawkins is so talented and adorable...why does she always do "wacky mom" on the red carpet?!


[Images via Getty]

Santa Monica, CA, October 25. Image via Filmmagic.

1. Land O Lakes Indian Maiden

The company explains: "Because the regions of Minnesota and Wisconsin were the legendary land of Hiawatha and Minnehaha, the idea of an Indian maiden took form." This is a whitewashed way of describing how they hijacked the image of indigenous people to sell dairy products, but whatever. The first painting was done in 1928; it was "modernized" in 1939 to look the way it does now. As a kid, I honestly thought that this was my mom until I realized it was Cher.

Hollywood Casting: Q'orianka Kilcher

2. Mrs. Butterworth


This woman was not always made of plastic. She used to be real glass. She had a bun and she was heavy and sweet and you respected her, because she didn't need (the noticeably absent) Mr. Butterworth to get the job done.

Hollywood Casting: Queen Latifah

3. SunMaid


The young woman on the raisin box has evolved since 1916. She's lost about 20 lbs., but she still has the red bonnet and the basket of grapes. And she still smiles.

Hollywood Casting: Minnie Driver

4. Aunt Jemima




Advertising gimmicks are not always politically correct. The pancake icon was based on a blackface "mammy" character; but R.T. Davis Milling Company hired a woman named Nancy Green to play Aunt Jemima from 1890 to 1923. She was paid, but the ads were disgustingly racist. (Try finding a syrup that is not oppressive! Even Log Cabin gives me pause.) In 1989, Aunt Jemima lost her kerchief, got a relaxer, some pearl earrings and a slimmer look. She kind of resembles Roxie Roker now. But who is woman enough to take on the challenge of playing a controversial character?

Hollywood Casting: Angela Bassett

5. Utz Girl




The rosy-cheeked chick has been around since 1921, though she's had some anti-aging procedure and seems much younger now. Her huge eyes and happy smile let you know her potato chips are damn good.

Hollywood Casting: Christina Ricci

6. Little Miss Sunbeam


This blond-haired blue-eyed little girl was on the table before wheat and oats crept into our sandwich bread. Little Miss Sunbeam was born in the 1940s, and she seems part Shirley Temple, part Doris Day and part Buffy and Jody from Family Affair. Or Cindy Brady. An "American Girl" full of "sunshine"…

Hollywood Casting: Abigail Breslin

7. Morton Salt Girl


When it rains it pours, whatever that means. The first umbrella girl appeared in 1914, looking like a toddler; she's grown up some since then. The angled haircut and the umbrella make for an inspired celebrity choice…

Hollywood Casting: Rihanna

8. Coppertone Girl



Introduced in 1959, the impish child whose blue swimsuit bottoms get pulled down by a cocker spaniel was played by a three-year-old Jodie Foster in 1965. Did you know that they changed the logo later because some thought her bare buttocks encouraged pedophilia? Now that the company makes sunscreen instead of tanning oils, the "paleface" message is no longer appropriate and she's been phased out.

Hollywood Casting: Dakota Fanning

9. Tropic-AnaThe Polynesian pretty who used to be topless has since been replaced with an orange and straw. It would be fun if they brought back a female icon who loves exhibitionism, wouldn't it?

Hollywood Casting: Bai Ling

10. Chiquita Banana


Born in 1944, Miss Chiquita was sometimes a lady, sometimes an actual fruit, as seen in this Disney commercial. Her jingle is awesome, even if she was pretty much just a Carmen Miranda rip off.

Hollywood Casting: Salma Hayek?

Don't like these choices? Have some of your own? Suggestions welcome.

[Celebrity images via Getty. Tropic-Ana photo by Michael Poulin via Flickr.]

*Inspired by Shirley MacLaine's assertion that the best parts for actresses fall into one of the above categories.

• Angela Bassett, ER: Bassett will be playing a troubled doctor who comes back to Chicago after doing tsunami relief in Indonesia. Her arrival promises to "shake County General's ER to the core." Verdict: Well "troubled" usually translates to "victim," although a victim usually doesn't shake a television series to it's "core." She might be playing a shrew as well.

• Nicole Kidman, Dusty Springfield Biopic: Novelist Michael Cunningham (The Hours) has revealed that Kidman will star in the upcoming Dusty Springfield biopic he's writing. The film will explore Springfield's tortured, drugged, and depressed years, as well as her successes. Verdict: No one does victims quite like Cunningham, and Springfield's biography is not lacking in victimized and depressed elements.

• America Ferrera, An Invisible Sign of My Own: Ferrera will star in this coming-of-age film about a 20-year-old loner who turns to math for salvation when her father becomes ill. [Uh, isn't that a play called 'Proof'? -Ed.] When the character becomes an adult, she must teach math to students using her crisis as inspiration. BO-RING. Verdict: All of the victim keywords are here: "crisis" "salvation" and "ill father," but the character might overcome her own victimization in the end, so we will have to see how the movie plays out. The only thing that is unfortunate about this is the talented Ferrera starring in another snoozer.

• Shenae Grimes, Beverly Hills, 90210: Former Degrassi: The Next Generation star, Grimes, will play Annie in this 90210 remake on the CW Network. The Annie character will be based on the character played by Shannen Doherty in the original. Verdict: Although Doherty was a decent character on the show, off-set, she was generally too busy victimizing people to be a victim herself.

Angela Bassett Makes Rounds For Last ER Shift [Reuters]
Nicole Kidman Playing Dusty Springfield In Biopic, Says Michael Cunningham [NY Mag]
America Ferrera Joins Invisible [THR]
90210 Cast Continues To Grow [Variety]

• Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie and all of their kids have hit the French Riviera. They're staying in a villa owned by Microsoft's Paul Allen that has breathtaking views of the Mediterranean Sea. A source says: "They love France and will now be here until after the babies are born and Angie is looking at Marseille hospitals as a potential place to give birth." [E!]
  
• These rumors about Mariah Carey marrying Nick Cannon will not die. Could they possibly be true??? [People]
  
• Gossip Girl gossip: Girl-on-girl action is on its way! [Perez Hilton]
  
• Plus! Lisa Loeb will make a cameo on Gossip Girl, playing a socialite. Hee! [LA Times]
  
• Paula Abdul spaced out or went cuckoo or something on American Idol. You can watch it here. [EW]

• Gwyneth Paltrow has broken her toes 30 times. She says: "I don't know what's wrong with me. Say there's a coffee table that's been there eight years. One day I'll just not know it's there and bash into it and break my toe." Is her macrobiotic diet giving her brittle bones or something? [Mirror]
• Gwyneth was also seen visiting a back specialist. And yet! She wears high-ass heels on the red carpet. [Daily Mail]
• Another story about Charlie Sheen and hookers, yawn. Although: His silk robe with"C. MaSheen'" embroidered over the pocket? Nice touch. [Page Six]
• Britney's brother Bryan Spears is dating actress Ivana Milicevic. You've seen her, she's been on TV and in a bunch of movies. [Page Six]
• Britney was seen walking around a spa in just her towel? Not sure why this is news. [The Sun]
• Newly sober Kirsten Dunst has been taking her All Good Things costar, Ryan Gosling, with her to 12-step meetings. But are they more than just costars? [Page Six]
• Dina Lohan: Seen "dancing, drinking and playing with her hair extensions." [Page Six]
• A judge has dismissed Ron Burkle's lawsuit against Italian businessman Raffaello Follieri, aka Anne Hathaway's boyfriend. [Rush & Molloy]
• Blind item! "What notoriously stingy actress buys books at her neighborhood Barnes & Noble downtown, only to try to exchange the dog-eared copies days later for cash?" [Rush & Molloy]
• Mario Lopez and Karina Smirnoff have not, repeat, NOT broken up. You may now return to your regularly scheduled apathy. [People]
• My Name Is Earl star Jason Lee is expecting a baby with girlfriend Cenren Alkac. Lee has a 4-year-old son, Pilot Inspektor, with his ex. So what kind of name will this kid get? [People]
• The title of the season finale of The Office is called "Goodbye, Toby." Plus: Spinoff rumors! [E!]
• Rapper T.I.: Has a new single, is hot. [ONTD]
• Diddy is hosting a $4 million "mega-party" to celebrate getting his name on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. David Beckham is helping him. Diddy will have 10 private jets; five different custom-made Sean Jean outfits, including a tux, a smoking jacket, and a top hat and tails; $400,000 worth of booze; and goodie bags with his own damn perfume in them. [Mirror]
• A former UCLA Medical Center hospital worker has been indicted in Federal charges for the theft of medical records of celebs like Farrah Fawcett, Maria Shriver and 60 others. She accepted $4,600 from "an unnamed national media outlet" for the info. [Reuters]
• Is Amy Winehouse leaving her record label? [The Sun]
• There is video proof that Ashley Dupre agreed to be filmed for Girls Gone Wild. [Yahoo News]
• Is Ashlee Simpson returning to reality TV? [MSNBC]
• Grammy-winning singer Mya was scheduled to being performances in Chicago on Broadway, but she's broken her foot! Sucks. [Playbill]
• "We pray for Brody. Honestly, Brody was such a good friend to me. He hooked Heidi and I up, and I think that everything will work out eventually. I wish that Brody and I were still best friends, I pray every day that everything works out between us." — Spencer Pratt. [People]
• Uma Thurman's parents testified in court yesterday regarding her stalker case. Uma's mom said she believed the stalker, Jack Jordan, "was someone who would benefit from medical attention." [AP]
• Vanilla Ice is off the hook for domestic battery charges because his wife recanted her original statement. [Yahoo News]
• Simon Cowell pays no attention to smoking bans. "He lights up where he likes - and pays the fine if he has to," says a source. [The Sun]
• Edie Falco battled breast cancer in 2003 but never told any of her Sopranos costars. [Page Six]
• SO MANY blind items from Michael Musto! "What hyper-quirky stage actor (who's also known for movies and TV) does lots of coke and has sex in club bathrooms when the boyfriend's at home? What fashion-magazine editor—no, not the obvious one—still has no idea how to use the Internet? (She has to have e-mails read aloud to her and then dictates the reply.) What current anchor is said to have been lesbian lovers with that unhinged late anchor, according to ancient legend? Which female rocker best known from the '70s and '80s recently got so plowed she blew chunks all over a nightclub? Which star who went from Hollywood hotshot to joke to rebounding talent has an impressively large member to go with his award? What longtime r&b singer was spotted in Harlem, where she told a fan who accosted her: 'If you ain't the crack man, don't come near me!'? Which legendary actor's bisexual father is murmured to have died of AIDS, not of "cancer," as the family officially reported? Which scandal-ridden ex-TV personality would have gotten a gay record deal, but he wouldn't come out of the closet? Shouldn't someone say, 'Who do you think you are?' Which star who denies being gay used to give so-so head and has a penis that's even less than four and a half inches? What famous grandson is so delightfully kinky he recently lodged M&Ms up his butt, turning his hole into a veritable McFlurry of sexual delight? (Alas, they melted before they could be of any use.) About which talk-show host's supposed girlfriend was Rosie O'Donnell heard to say: 'Look at her nails! She could never be a lesbian with those nails!'?" [Village Voice]

• A blog called The Blemish says that grainy BJ picture from yesterday is most decidedly not Lindsay Lohan. They have proof, but be warned: It involves a link to porn site XTube. [The Blemish]
  
• Meanwhile, Lindsay is spending Easter visiting her terminally ill grandfather on Long Island... And she took BFF Samantha Ronson with her. [E!]
  
• Renée Zellweger says she's dyed her hair so many times she's amazed "it's still attached to my head, by the grace of God." She doesn't talk about what she's on, though. [Page Six]

• Did Michelle Williams try to save Heath Ledger's life right before he died? [TMZ]
• A woman is suing Harpo Entertainment, claiming that crazy Oprah fans stampeded and pushed her down the stairs when she was an audience member. Orit Greenberg claims she has "severe and permanent injuries" and is seeking $50,000. That's a big give! [TMZ]
• Tori Spelling says she'd love to be in the 90210 remake. "Maybe I could be one of the main character's young step mom," she says. Well, Tori, first they have to ask you. [People]
• Jackass star Steve-O: "I was always powerless over alcoholism ... I haven't mentioned nitrous oxide, the drug I 'fiend' for, by far, the most. I used to inhale this gas by cartridge, specifically, by the case." [People]
• Jennifer Aniston is teaming up with Courteney Cox in an effort to raise $1 million for Epidermolysis Bullosa (EB), a rare and potentially deadly skin condition that mainly afflicts children. [ET]
• Chris Brown is still denying that he's with Rihanna. "I am a single guy," he says. "I have a close friend but it's not like a relationship. I'm just living my life and having fun." Jerk. [Mirror]
• Pamela Anderson is on the safety patrol at her sons' school. "You have to do it," she says. "And I love it." Surely she has a knack for stopping traffic. [Mirror]
• Aw, cute picture of Amy Winehouse when she was a schoolgirl. [The Sun]
• Angela Bassett was in tears yesterday as she got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Congrats! [Concrete Loop]
• Legendary screenwriter Buck Henry has been diagnosed with cancer. [Page Six]
• Chris Rock says a black First Lady could be a problem: "Because a black woman cannot play the background of a relationship. Just imagine telling your black wife that you're president? 'Honey, I did it! I won! I'm the president.' 'No, we the president! And I want my girlfriends in the Cabinet! I want Kiki to be secretary of state! She can fight!'" [Page Six]

In fact, of EW's twenty-five "Ultimate Hotties," the only ethnic ones are Latina: Half-Bolivian Raquel Welch, Mexican Salma Hayek, half-Mexican Jessica Alba, and half-Spanish Rita Hayworth. What about Rachel Weisz? Angela Bassett? Lucy Liu? Or, really, anyone who doesn't inspire girls to ask for nose jobs, $300 highlights or eyelid-surgery for their sweet sixteens?

Sarah Jessica Parker named world's unsexiest woman [Sydney Morning Herald]
Ultimate Female Hotties: Pick the All-Time No. 1 [Entertainment Weekly]