Victoria Beckham's Designer Dreams In The Bargain Bin

• Poor Posh. After the embarrassingly poor sales of her denim line and ensuing abandonment by retailers, we hear that her men's dVb line has been pushed back "until next year" by L.A. boutique Kitson. Plucky Posh is undaunted, having spoken of her desire to launch a couture line and show at New York's fashion week. dVb denies the line is floundering, claiming that "it is currently being manufactured but is likely to reach stores later than anticipated." [This Is London]
• A man has confessed to the murder of Canadian model Diana O'Brien, whose body was found last week in Shanghai, where the 20-year-old was on a 3-month modeling contract. 18-year-old Chen Jun was arrested Friday morning in Anhui province; he apparently killed the model during an armed robbery of her apartment. [CNN]
• Gwyneth Paltrow is really slacking in her obligations to Estee Lauder's new "Sensous" perfume, refusing to show for any of the hundred ridiculous promos the company's set up (opening the stock market, anyone?) and leaving the burden on the slender shoulders of co-pitchwomen Hilary Rhoda, Carolyn Murphy, and Elizabeth Hurley. Recriminations all around. [New York Magazine]

Colorful Fashion Gays Get Into Spat Over Turban • Oral Sex Can Lead To Throat Cancer

Simon Doonan apologizes for an unfunny joke he made about Andre Leon Talley's turban at the CFDA Awards. Imagine how pissed ALT would have been if Simon commented on his floor-length velvet cape. • Developers say "The Audrey" a "kitchen computer for women" flopped because of the economy, but we think its failure had more to do with the fact that women don't need "lady computers." • International pop sensation George Michael announces his "final two" big concerts, and he might retire from touring all together! • Is there an ice cream connection between female pop stars and mental breakdowns? • OMG you guyzzz, Miley and Mandy finally released their comeback video to AC/DC dance crew! And it features all of the hit stars of the late '90s? • Sorry: HPV in the throat contracted through oral sex can cause throat cancer more easily than tobacco or alcohol. • A NY state rep pushes for foreign models to be reclassified to a different visa category for entertainers and athletes. • The girls at Fashion Meets Finance disappoint people with brains. Quick! Spot the SATC quote in the article! • Is your sweater turning you into a "sad and sorry sack"? This vintage ad promises to get you the boy's attention you so desperately, desperately crave (click on Andre to see full ad).

Designer Divas Naomi Campbell And Sharon Stone Get Spanked

• Naomi Campbell has finally been charged for her April freakout at London's Heathrow airport. “Campbell is accused of three counts of assaulting a constable, one count of disorderly conduct likely to cause harassment, alarm or distress and one count of using threatening, abusive words or behavior to cabin crew, according to reports.” Her court date is set for June 20th; does anyone think that maybe a stint in juvie could set her straight? [The Guardian]
• Christian Dior cosmetics spokesmodel Sharon Stone continues to pay for her ridiculous remarks regarding last week's earthquake in China: Dior is pulling all ads starring the Hollywood wackadoo "from all of the department stores and from all of China". Karma, baby! [NY Times]
• Andre Leon Talley is returning to the Savannah College of Art and Design to speak at the school's May 31 commencement ceremony. Think he'll wear the "floor-length red satin robe and silver crown accented with red 'rubies'" this time around? [Paris Parfait]

Vivienne Westwood Never Gets Her Knickers In A Twist

• Vivienne Westwood rules for many reasons; here's reason number 1,457: when the designer received honors of British ranking at Buckingham Palace in the '90s, she went “knickerless on both occasions.” [The Star]
• Proenza Schouler is teaming up with Guiseppe Zanotti to expand its line of footwear. I’m crossing my fingers that the prices won’t be unbearable, because this news excites me more than you know. [Elle UK]
• This is the stuff nightmares are made of. Photographer Nick Knight plans to create 3-D images of a 30-foot Naomi Campbell. “He has scanned Naomi 'straddling the barrel of a large tank' to form one sculpture, and another is envisioned as a 'circle of three Naomis, like The Three Graces.'" Please, people, stop encouraging this woman's egomania. [Fashionologie]

Retraction: Agyness Deyn Is Offically Actually Awesome

• Breaking news: a Telegraph profile today inspired me to finally watch the Agyness Deyn music video. It is generic and derivative and cynically targeted at the aging Britpop nostalgists who write blogs and I fucking love it. Oh man, and I don't even hate myself for this. Embedded after the jump. [Telegraph]
  
• Tinsley Mortimer's makeup may look light and natural but it is actually deceptively heavy and high-maintenance! One brave New York writer consumed three hours she will never get back in an effort to emulate the Tinz. And you wonder why they pay her the big bucks. [NY Mag]

It's A Bird! It's A Plane! No, It's Anna Wintour's Dress

The Fashions At Flawless Were Anything But

Michael Kors: #1 "Wannabe" Fan

• "Of course I am a Spice Girls fan. I love everything that teenage girls love. I am the oldest teenage girl." That's Michael Kors, who went to see the Spice Girls when they performed in the New York area this week. Other fashion world luminaries who showed up the concert to hear such sonic gems as "Two become One": ELLE editor-in-chief Roberta Myers and fashion director Nina Garcia, Harper's Bazaar EIC Glenda Bailey, and Vogue European editor-at-large Hamish Bowles. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• "They're the most exciting thing since Warhol," says Vogue's Andre Leon Talley of English rockers/designers Rodnik. So enamored is he that he was willing to give up his front-row seat at Proenza Schouler last week so that he could join the Rodnik designers in the standing room area. [Vogue UK]
  
• Marc Jacobs: Fond of male escorts! [NY Daily News]
  
• The Times of India asks: Is fashion industry caste and gender biased? We're gonna go out on a limb and say "yeah." [TOI]

Heidi Klum Makes It Work; Designs For Jordache Jeans

• The facts speak for themselves: Heidi Klum is designing a capsule collection for Jordache, for which she has been modeling over the past year. Think she'll offer hair extensions to cover nipples as well? [WWD, sub req'd]
  
• Kathy Hilton just released her own perfume. It's called "My Secret." We don't really want to think about what Kathy Hilton's secret might smell like. [BellaSugar]
  
• Gloria Steinem would not approve: Georgina Chapman, Marchesa designer and wife of Halston co-owner Harvey Weinstein, was named "Georgina Weinstein" on her front row seat at Halston yesterday. Only, as Chapman herself put it, "I didn't change my name, they did it for me." [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Jimmy Choo's CEO Tamara Mellon thinks that boyfriend Christian Slater should take a more active, or acting, role in fashion. Mellon says Slater would be "perfect" to play Halston in any upcoming biopic on the designer. [WWD, 1st item]

Last night at The Box nightclub here in New York, the British designers behind Rodnik (Philip Colbert and Richard Ascott) showed their Fall/Winter 2008 collection in a somewhat interesting way: Instead of a runway and floodlights and rows and rows of chairs, the designers decided to publicly perform a set of really, really bad rock songs while their models chilled on stage. Yes, Rodnik is not only a fashion label, but a band! (Drums and vocals, specifically.) And damn if everyone wasn't totally behind them in their endeavor. There was laughter, free booze, and even dancing by fashion industry gatekeepers Anne Slowey (of Elle) and Andre Leon Talley (you know where he works.) Photos of the event begin in the gallery after the jump.

Modeling Matriarch Continues To Demand Diversity On The Runways

Nothing Comes Between Kate Bosworth And Her Calvins

• Kate Bosworth is the new face of Calvin Klein jeans. Looks good enough to make us forget another girl named Kate who once was the face of CK jeans. [Vogue UK]
  
• In case you forgot, here's what Brooke Shields looked like in her Calvins. [Sassybella])
  
• With nary a girl to dress for red carpet season, Badgley Mischka has made an awards-attending Barbie. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Mazel Tov to Stella McCartney, who just gave birth to baby number three, a son, Beckett Robert Lee Willis. McCartney and her husband Aldashair WIllis have two other children and one ex-wicked stepmother. [WWD, 2nd item]

Halloween Hagyness Looks Just Like Misshapes Hagyness!

• Model Agyness Deyn and designer Henry Holland went as Mr. and Mrs. Beetlejuice for Halloween. They did their own makeup. [Vogue UK]
  
• Jennifer Hudson on Vogue editor-at-large/hideous capelet advocate Andre Leon Talley: "I was like André, you don't have a cell phone? André, you don't e-mail? He's like, 'I don't e-mail honey, I don't do that,' I was like, 'No, no, no, we have to get that together." [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Jacob "Jacob the Jeweler" Arabov has pleaded guilty to the charges of falsifying records and lying to a federal agent during a drug investigation. We hope all that ice can buy a man a carton of cigarettes in the big house. [WWD, sub req'd]

Marc Jacobs To Host Aladdin-Themed Halloween Party

• Those invited to Marc Jacobs' annual holiday costume party (aka - not us) need to start preparing their costumes now. The theme has finally been announced! "Arabian Nights." We double-dare someone to go as Edward Said. [WWD, 2nd item]
  
• The most important movie of all time, the Sex and the City movie, shot at the offices of the most important magazine of all time, Vogue. My god, how did the world not combust when these two forces joined powers? Also, Anna Wintour will not be appearing in the movie. But Andre Leon Talley will! And we hope that Jennifer Hudson, who is playing Carrie Bradshaw's assistant in the movie, manages to restrain herself re: that whole idiotic bolero-from-Mars thingy he made her wear to the Oscars. [WWD, 1st item]
  
• Why we love Barneys New York's Creative Director Simon Doonan, reason #482: "Everyone in the music industry looks like a hooker. Let's call it porno-chic. It seems to me nowadays that Janis Joplin wouldn't be able to get her clog in the door without a full makeover!" [Fashion Week Daily]

For Celeb Stylist Rachel Zoe, The Worst Is Yet To Come

• Anna Wintour-mocking Rachel Zoe has been dropped from her management company because "they didn't want to anger Anna and Anna is more important." [NY Post]
  
• Agyness Deyn, the Most Important Model In The Universe right now, turns out to not really be 18 or even 21 (ages she's given to various interviewers) but 24. Which explains why Dodai calls her "Hagness". [Daily Mail]
  
• Vogue's Andre Leon Talley is really glad that Calvin Klein is using black actor Djimon Hounsou as the face of his campaign because Talley feels that black faces are not getting the exposure they deserve. Which is why, we assume, he referred to Honsou as "what's his name... [the] black man." LOL. [Fashion Week Daily]
  
• Paradox of the day: Dockers trunk shows. [WSJ]