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How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script

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mbg1968
07/01/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
The minute my husband told the NATIONAL PRESS that he was "trying to fall back in love with me" would be the minute I changed the locks, as Maureen Dowd suggested here [www.nytimes.com]

Trying?!? Can anyone say PUBLIC HUMILIATION? What a creep!
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hollygirl
07/01/09

@mbg1968: Really incredible.
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tell Dolly Parton again
07/01/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
Wouldn't it be amazing if Sanford just up and resigned, moved to Argentina, went to live with his mistress and was never heard from again? Like if he put his money where his mouth was instead of saying "Well, I love her, but my career comes first!" That's essentially what this is, I think, and Jenny Sanford is going along with it presumably because there are benefits to being the governor's wife. Sanford wants to play himself as this romantic figure, but everything he's doing is so, so cynical.
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leesie
07/01/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
As a latina, can I express my total annoyance at the bullshit stereotypical language being used by Sanford and media outlets to describe the affair and the Argentinian mistress?

They include, "forbidden," "passionate," "fiery," "steamy."

Fucking hell, people.
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Rooo sez BISH PLZ
07/01/09

@leesie: Oh, you got that too. So nice -- well, that's the wrong word -- to know his execrable word choices were not a figure of my imagination.

Es un hijo de ... well. This is a public site. Never mind.
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debbyherbenick
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
This is so sad... especially as there are still children involved and a wife. Love story or not, it perhaps is not best shared with the public.
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SomeAuthorGirl
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
Pee-yoo. I felt a little badly for the guy for like five minutes. However, now that we've crossed into TMI-Crazytown, someone needs to grasp him firmly by the shoulders and insist he shut the fuck up. This comes off as nuts, not just the run-of-the-mill ass-y and douchey behavior we've come to expect from public figures.
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Sunflowercat
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
On top of the national clinic in assholery that he's been holding for the past week, as one of the poor schmucks with the misfortune to live in this jackass's state, all the soulmate/hiking/faux-Biblical horseshit he's been laying out is second to the fact that he's probably the only goddamn governor in the country who may be worse than Sarah Palin. Now we're not only never going to dig out from under the horrific unemployment -- which is being remedied by a few thousand jobs cleaning up a former nuclear site at this point, by the way, which is all our politicians think the poor deserve to do when we're not serving them their fucking drinks -- we're being held hostage by the other Republicans in office, none of whom want the (also incredibly substandard) lieutenant governor to be able to run as an incumbent, so they won't impeach this self-righteous prick. If you think he's despicable on paper, try living with the godforsaken idiot for seven years and counting.
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Madlenka
06/30/09

@Sunflowercat: Le Sigh. I am a former Texan who moved to New York a few years ago. I get no pleasure from this, but I think I can proffer some non-Palin alternatives to rival SC's ridiculous mess of governance:

1. George W. Bush--Good god.

2. Rick Perry--Somehow a huger asshole than Bush.

3. Eliot Spitzer--I needn't go into his idiocy, because we're all too aware of it. However, the combination of his winning personality and the state's legislature meant that little to nothing actually got done while he was in office. I actually really like our current governor (I'm one of only about 19% in that camp right now), but the State Senate is still populated with scions of asshattery that show me that the only problem with big government is that when the douches at the helm can't get their shit together, it becomes a state-sized epic fail.

Don't worry, I'm not saying any of these top Sanford at the moment, just that I can feel your pain.
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Rooo sez BISH PLZ
07/01/09

@Madlenka: I'm a New Yorker who spent (post-Richards) time in Texas and then moved back home here.

You and I may have more in - how shall I put it, "reciprocal common"? - than your narrative might indicate.
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La Chica Lucy
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
Megan, this post was so well written, especially the last four paragraphs. Brilliant, really.
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Hana Maru
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
"she claimed that her husband encouraged her to meet his mistress but she refused"

I know what's up. He totally wanted to nudge them both into a threesome.
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tonightineed is actually Mrs. Ziegler-Spock
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
Okay, "trying to fall back in love" with your wife is not something you should ever come out and say publicly. Even if it's true, there is no reason to ever say it aloud in a public forum.

Then again, Sanford doesn't really seem to grasp that concept otherwise.
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willwriteforfood
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
What exactly is he expecting to get out of telling A REPORTER FOR A NATIONAL NEWS OUTLET, "I'm trying to fall back in love with my wife"? If she were smart, she'd tell him to save it, and get herself a damn good lawyer.

I love this part: "This was a whole lot more than a simple affair, this was a love story. A forbidden one, a tragic one, but a love story at the end of the day."

What, you're Romeo and Juliet now? Verbal diarrhea is right.
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bajita
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
Attn all cheating spouses who act like your new affairs "open their minds," or that their "love is on fire for your new soulmate":

Has it occurred to you that you're so "in love" and so "excited" because of the forbiddenness and newness of the affair? Jesus. I feel like a mom telling her 14 year-old she's not going to be with her 8th grade boyfriend forever.

(Yeah I realize some affairs do last- like Paul Newman & Joanne Woodward- but Sanford acting like his affair is ok because it was a "tragic love story" kinda makes me ill)
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lalaland13
06/30/09

@bajita: And even Paul Newman had an affair, sadly.
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WashingMyHair
06/30/09

@bajita: Exactly, he's only been with her a handful of times...what an idiot!
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laundryday
06/30/09

@bajita: Plus this guy seems so tamped down in his normal life that I imagine he is like a 14-year-old discovering exciting feelings for the first time. It's just his audience is grown-ups. I think there's something pretty genuine about what he's saying, it's just that it's hilariously immature.
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Schm
06/30/09

@bajita: I had a sorta-fling with a foreign guy a while back, and we slept together in America and then met up in Europe again for a hot weekend. I just thought it was fun times, nothing more, but he was always sending me these intense Sanford-esque emails about our "unrequited love" and all this crazy bullshit. It was really weird.

Then I found out he had a super serious girlfriend the whole time we had been hooking up, and suddenly it all made sense. He was a sad loser who was afraid to break up with his S.O., so he decided to become obsessed with some forbidden fruit instead and in his mind justified it into some dramatic "impossible love" scenario. Same shit, different day. These guys watch way too many movies, methinks.
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queenieinmanhattan
06/30/09

@bajita: I have to believe Paul and Joanne wrote letters that were leaps and bounds better than those emails.
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ratz
06/30/09

@laundryday:

You said it precisely right! It is so embarrassing because you really can sense how genuine he is.
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queenieinmanhattan
06/30/09

@ratz: My German friend told me there's a new slang word circulating in Germany these days - it basically means to be ashamed for someone, to be acutely embarrassed on their behalf. It's like the mirror image of schadenfreude, and equally as useful.
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DangerMouse
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
OMG I AM SO SPECIAL THIS IS REALLY LOVE I AM SO DIFFERENT FROM EVERY OTHER PHILANDERER EVER LET ME TALK ABOUT IT AGAIN.

Dude, you are not a beautiful and unique snowflake; you're really just another guy who cheated on his wife. You just happened to go down big for it. You're also trying to make it better by saying you were in love as though that excuses you from doing the right thing (whether the right thing be not seeing the new woman, separating from your wife in advance, whatever).
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Schm
06/30/09

@DangerMouse: I think this guy irks me so much because this was the same exact shit my dad pulled when he left my mom. He met some other woman and suddenly was all "Oh my god, I'm in LOVE, you all couldn't possibly understand!"

I find that when adults act this way, it's usually because they never had a chance to date around enough when they were younger. They seriously think no one in the world could possibly understand their passionate, beautiful love, and they'll use that as an excuse to throw away each and every responsibility and consideration to their family.
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queenieinmanhattan
06/30/09

@Schmalerie: I find that when adults act this way, it's usually because they are painfully and acutely narcissistic, not unlike my father - who has done this to three different women (no Argentinian ladies, but one Swiss one, were involved), including my mother, over the last thirty years. Man is a serial monogamist, with slight overlaps.

I love him, but the justification and "rebirth" that has to accompany the start of each new relationship is just so far beyond me. The sheer drama of it all makes my head spin.
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Schm
06/30/09

@queenieinmanhattan: Yes, absolutely. Oh and sorry to hear about your parents too - it's such a shitty situation to be stuck in the middle of.

I definitely think that kind of intense narcissism goes hand in hand with being emotionally immature and inexperienced with relationships. I probably acted with the same amount of drama over someone when I was 15, but since then I've moved on and learned. It was vomit-inducing to be in my mid 20's and see my father excuse his cheating by thinking of himself as some Shakespearean protagonist involved in a love "no one could ever understand", while skipping town on my poor mom who was left with all the bills.

Ugh. This is why I'm afraid to ever get married.
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queenieinmanhattan
06/30/09

@Schmalerie: Are we related? ;-)
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Samanthrax
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
You know... I really don't think the fact that he was unfaithful to his wife has anything to do with his ability to be a shitty Governor. Using government funds to do it, however, is another story.
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RainbowBrite
06/30/09

@Samanthrax is Sarcastic and Joking: The fact that he's against gay marriage and yet fails to honor the commitments of his own takes it to another level, in my opinion. If he weren't so fucking sanctimonious I wouldn't be so eager to judge his own shortcomings.
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Schm
06/30/09

@Samanthrax is Sarcastic and Joking: I know this maybe sounds cold, but I'd rather my elected officials be having Lewinsky-type extramarital activities than shit like this. At least Clinton didn't fall in love and spend a bunch of taxpayer money flying around to go see her, abandoning his duties. People are dangerously incapable of being responsible and rational when they fall in love hard.

At this point I just expect that every politician is going to cheat, and I honestly don't really care. But they need to be able to compartmentalize, and they owe it to their voters to not allow a little bit of fucking to sweep them off their feet and away from their job.
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LBB
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
attempting to fall back in love with his wife

FAIL. Automatic, do not pass "Go", do not collect $200, go directly to hell, FAIL.
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NotIt
06/30/09

In reply to How The Sanfords Are Rewriting The Public Infidelity Script
I like to imagine that Jenny Sanford is holed up with some chocolate, reading through all the old CEFADs, realizing that we all make mistakes. Like the mistake of being in a relationship with a dude who seems to be primarily concerned with himself.
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Rooo sez BISH PLZ
07/01/09

@NotIt: @pileofmonkeys: *snort* As Coleman's lady friend said about the lobster and cracked crab at the end of "Trading Places" -- "Can't we have both?"
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jeepgirl
07/01/09

@Rooo sez BISH PLZ:
@pileofmonkeys:
"Looking good, Billy Ray!!"
"Feeling good, Lewis!!"
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